WYIL Ch 15

I squeezed c15bf0300b the voice bc8c6c5cb8 out of a6f12214dc my dry 6e3824bd03 throat.6619a990f05589ab

“Okay. I will.”511c529c722e9706

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Perhaps my b99f7050ac small voice fe535cd527 was heard, 67b75e3588 and his 29f35abec8 words that 34db72fb91 continued were b06dc8d50f cut off.0c14dd56555f5e4a

“Wife.”d61e607d6428d94b

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He called me dbc7cd9948 in a slightly f24646fd45 raised voice. I spoke quickly 401357bf7d before he said 01e62688d2 anything else.8658d1f3999f3703

“I will do f769588940 as you say.”d5b303880d16b0bc

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I stuttered 6b233c5a0f a little, c0dfdc175b but I ec5cf74219 continued the 94b5d44d3a sentence without 8a449d2197 stopping until f8810bdbd0 the end.9cd5cdb4f97f10a1

“I’m sorry. For a while, I wasn’t feeling well. Don’t worry I won’t trouble you any more.”7abc8c9777093494

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“You never caused a14fb755ec any trouble.”e473233d66a34fff

Instead of sympathizing with accd54a17a the kind words, I b128cae1a1 apologized repeatedly.6b5bc28b7ff4ac67

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“I’m sorry to have worried you. I’ll do as you say, so go and work. You must be busy.”7de1c924adf24b41

He hesitated 8720b1ee6a for a 7e1ea8f7b1 moment then 857a7b77ae he added a5ed2710bc murmuringly.ee7c920099cba22e

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“……I see.”6b843fbce54c9c12

The movement felt by 7c7a3638d6 the door disappeared, and a0e9aab77c the heavy footsteps faded 623bbed48e away.1be1bc2b8bafa549

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……He left.a435961115571f25

What I 46ce0c0af7 wanted to cd5be08d94 happen came 7af4a5684f true, but d5ce818486 strangely, I f62a8b8bd2 felt empty 1974544c71 as if c5abb6c605 there was 1c01c96f52 a hole b4306d3261 in my 990f7ec44e chest.92adb27deb1ff3eb

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‘Stop being stupid.’5a407b64a4e37efb

I wiped the a7abf53b1b bitter smile that 506ab7b4f1 appeared on my 6e39c975b3 lips and got b35128016a up.c51fc0bbbc83be3c

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I’m getting out of my bed after a week. A week. Enough time to waste on being stupid and delusional.5b15ae4075347de5

I was 8a77dc28ee too full a0536137c1 of myself.bfa87645eaf25ec4

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“Let’s stop now.”e98e9abbe0004bfb

Let’s not bother others and also not disturb Aslan and Rosalyn because of my unnecessary lingering feelings.71f7755c01cf69f8

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I walked lightly towards e56433227b the window. My body, which 8524420d9e had not moved eea7e8ae4e for a long e8dab64d9d time, was tired, 9180bcc7b7 but it was d89027711c not a big a1400a66cb problem.d9078918e6cdf0a7

My mind was clear f1cb81c28b and my mood had 6a58fce107 refreshed too.ee214d2b9eac13ab

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Gradually when 197a00c229 I opened 60fd45e741 the curtains. I saw a view 6cfc314856 from the big window. As usual, the f0704e90df sky above the 22f5f199e9 busy people was 1a18ca787e clear without a 4cf4e01b28 cloud.96240d43b6c9712b

“It’s a nice day to leave.”c495af85eb34426b

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That’s a relief.8dce7ba023bb4156

I took my eyes bee500b80a off the sunny sky 6ab2aaa5da and organized what I edf63e4c5f had to do right 038e6d2ede away.345b5ad2bb9d238f

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I thought I 1d2f9558f9 would just leave dc3f339e42 because I was e32928a60d preparing step by 7d4cd4e274 step, but I 894949b1dd think I will 50eee6770c have to put 094402f234 a lot of 7c61e86456 effort into it.f73c9652441a7b2b

There is a long way to go. So I had to create a power that I didn’t have.093f7b73c97c0d3f

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First, I 7a6dab73cc ate the 6280b723a0 food that 8f42db42b0 Jenna left b3e555e4b9 behind. It was cold 0420544268 because I left 777c51351f it outside, but 0a3498aeea it was still daf4c29840 delicious.8cff6269086710eb

It was also c05ce969bc because the chef 4a3d43507b was good at fc40e8561c cooking, but most 72113a84b2 of all, it 5fa5f1fa04 was because everything f505f68ce8 suited my taste.882d18f2be5d3334

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Maybe I wasn’t the only one who got used to this mansion over the past three years, but this place also got used to me.9961b73fc71185d1

I felt a little better when I thought that the three years I have spent here won’t lose it’s meaning and would not disappear.53b463e13cc90435

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Then, funnyly, I felt 6f055bec27 energized.bba1ce0bcfa9d33c

After eating, I a842eda926 washed myself in f1e9ead2d2 the bathroom.bea59387b8522a30

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Bathing alone 74a81ef585 was a 3f904703af familiar thing. It was only 354c6c7169 a year or b819163a46 so until the feef0293a8 Countess Larestine died b54ca50e3d that she was f13b7b2bb2 bathed by the 5c25379147 servants.7aad508a55b2c14f

I washed a16180a85d thoroughly, dried 17589768e9 my hair, 6240da6567 and put f38ed42c1e on my dd3c1fe59c clothes. Plain casual clothes that 7e89c9c2a3 could be worn alone eba6637386 without needing any assistance.fd99814f79c9f3d2

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I also 02958d0e2b finished my 8237c29ca1 makeup easily. It was 9e49dcb048 not good 03d1df71ad to see 99768f9e45 that I fe771c3a4e lost more 4c1df15df1 weight on 5ae527dced my skinny 3b073bb6b5 face because 6575363051 I skipped 06a81dc063 meals, but 40e029fafc my complexion 0e88e9db64 was okay 8c934d1b70 thanks to 64dd85be4e my sleeping 9060436f03 well while 76ca4d627b escaping from 146127cdaf reality.7e4d431c88a75f6e

I lightly patted my a7294500c9 cheek and smiled. I was 9ee1db92f8 worried that f4c5685396 it would 083c32ede8 be awkward 1b8984a034 to smile 24baea18ec because of 126aa6aead the muscles 0132dbc1a5 that had 41d1faf457 not moved 3b2d6693ec in the a0eca48d3b past, but 62047e547a it was 9c1f118706 no different e8966f765b than usual.20f518d52e0f28bb

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Thank god. I took my eyes fe61ba84bb off my face with 3bf7a56d39 a false smile and d4a221d3a2 left the bedroom.bfcec80028047559

With every 5e19cb9e90 step towards e01a945bdf the office, 8485dded3d the regrets 359cc3057f and hesitation 280906ba48 fell away.a55aecd6db3ace59

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As I 17527945d1 was organizing 89644a408d my words 64a97434de to say eabd5c0c9f to Aslan, ac8214730b I imagined 59de5f3a0c how he e08140d156 would react.b48db1345cda6538

Will he c9d9c4cef6 be surprised, 0b2aea9145 a little 26d0f95313 embarrassed, or e08a20db68 will he c25cb1da90 react completely 837c94c9ac bluntly?51630bfc9a7247b9

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Or…… Will he a0bb45c40c accept it as 87ae035aa3 if he was fdac25824d waiting?38947a0aa905ea02

Maybe he wanted me 41b8d72bac to tell him that 93a59b593c I was leaving him 03cae350d3 first.9b52a208b2f7ff68

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He is a kind 0831ed9b18 person, so it must f580c1ac66 have been difficult for 221bc25a20 him to say goodbye 9bf2231fcc to me first.1340ef8b3c175fcf

We’re not lovers, but we still have feelings for each other of the three years that we spent together.051022f43c75f7ce

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He might have been hiding his true feelings all this time because he didn’t want to hurt me.638b6ddf2eb96826

How hard it must cee1128578 be for him to 247980a9c9 tell me to leave 972c95b83e knowing how much I 4d9b95287e rely on him…….f8606750cb7bec83

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It hurts my heart de539437ad to think of him 88efcf6ca5 who would be heartbroken aa9e1fe5ca for not being able 9240d9383c to approach Rosalyn proudly e24cb0583e because of me.1822befdd55f7a24

But thanks to that, 49a69337f4 I was able to d49ca27135 make a perfect decision ac41b176f0 right before I arrived e02b99d46c at the office.a9ba3f7a15638d9b

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Now it’s time to put an end to this nonsensical play.441f2c411ed245e9

I closed fdacba7625 my stiff 584e3b04c4 eyes tightly. It was dark. My world would probably fc221c7e9f be this dark after 972d7342ee I will lose him.dec37bf316809314

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I was afraid to ca7b8b64f9 think about it, but…….7e6e90059ee50a99

“I’ll finish it.”a3795b90bae9dbe5

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The resolution 4f815022cd was unshakable.40ffd67a4d98da5b

I was the one who started this mess, so I must be the one to wrap it up. That’s what I should do.It’s my duty.b13c56476494f8a8

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It was 29f43d4193 already bad 28da9ab45c for an 7b49190d8a extra to 531f867e82 intervene among 2394f490b4 the main aa5a867972 characters.69fcf1d83d47692a

 b6047af5b7ac5e75

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2.SUBSTITUTE

 cb5a94343904a568

It was fffb040619 the day 5518fd69de I turned e446127749 ten that ec9a25765e I remembered 263901e31a my previous b0477a9bf6 life.ac1900ffe03f972d

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There wasn’t any big event that day.9ee664c11c269ae2

As usual, when I b2f4bd8d42 woke up early in 1cdf65fc06 the morning, I just bc6852c75d remembered my previous life.4225d9230e5fbd93

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I was amazed at myself that I didn’t even know about it until yesterday.2e6615453b740370

But that was also brief. Remembering my previous life didn’t change anything.9111452b33968718

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I’ve already lived this life for 10 years, and life here was a little hard and tiring, but not unhappy.a484fcf03b6ae4b1

It was 2544d03571 thanks to 7d07cdd85d my family 3e9163ccc6 who cherished 0b9f6aa013 me.6419033481cbc7fe

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[Lyla, my beloved daughter. How were we blessed with such a pretty girl ?]

Even though I was not from a very wealthy family, they let me attend an expensive girls’ school.7af9271a9646de3c

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The money my 5b897bdf50 father earned alone af798dbce9 was not enough, 29c8553039 so most of 14f174ae2e the money my 198ad71182 mother and even f6bda358b7 my younger brother 19c6665602 earned by helping f057cfdada out went into 857b53ca11 my tuition.592c35cea9886986

This was because my 95f9ef317f parents, who admired me 44fc6704dc as a genius after 5b2e29eb24 remembering my previous life, f1775b040e wanted me to be 0647cfc1bf educated in a better b6597d01a2 environment.94918244a5e678d7

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Even if 6454dcde97 I dissuaded 1eb3a5689a them by 4635f7f91a saying it e3c2546f41 was okay, 9fa771c6fc my parents bd2a007da0 somehow sent 12fd9c0f6a me to d241e5358e school, saying a099476f22 that my 0009fb6392 talent must 31824d32b8 bloom.55d76597e73d3393

If I felt burdened, b195257f1a they comforted me in ceacf9c5fb this way.8007059cc0f05017

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[If you learn now, it will definitely be helpful. Later, when you become a successful person, you can pay us back.]

I, thirsty for 5c554656cc learning, nodded my 5d8f9710bb head reluctantly at ed669fb58d the words. Of course, c532c8bf35 I did 2331f5f9ff not forget 49802e1992 to be 8b2355e608 grateful. One day, I b312a2ebf7 would definitely repay b843e0f6a8 my family.86976ad17fda5230

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People around me d6ef3f16f7 laughed at me 6ba08a536f and my family f409e915ae for spending so 0b4ca80e14 much money on 208cbaaf91 my studies but b16715d9a8 my family firmly 495952be0e gave me the 10d1ed9799 love that an 01c7a1b3e3 aristocratic lady deserves.ef2f705f6ad93223

[Lyla everything will be fine. You will be treated with respect and you will grow old gracefully. You don’t have to live like us.]

[Look how smart your sister is, there’s no way we’ll let you rot in a place like this.]

Memories of my past d672a63193 lives were quite helpful.f97aa11982f5c22b

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I was mature for my age, and I was evaluated as a good and smart kid who didn’t need much work.7c8cb8eca63b2e22

My parents were 1f7b893401 proud that I 9b80608990 was clever and b8eb57b3a6 thoughtful.ee8cbca37b710c79

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My parents were even 117ba2243e more proud of me 99649adf5b because I took care 6d44844724 of my younger brother 480fd9c8fc in their place.5f16e9be8f927792

My younger brother, whom fa0b3a4ddd I raised since childhood, fe0f2bf5e1 followed me well.20e6aac8dd74ca36

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An ordinary 07b50e0ef8 commoner family 2d420eed5c who are 994700efb8 neither rich a07702c62f nor poor.cee21279555d6645

A harmonious family 4c713ca8c3 full of love, bc27857a88 for each other.c1b609d28203283a

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I loved such a family. To the point where I didn’t miss my past life.61564a4526dd1bf0

So I never felt 8db250fd8d sorry for the memory bc0c442b03 of my previous life 0762950385 to fade. For me, a d1af3ece7b previous life was 4d5d5ebee2 just a tool 725405315a that made me 17daab60b6 realize how precious 20b2aebb81 my new life 6b41043544 is.9a8c237e975bb94f

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That’s how much hope, dreams, and laughter I had while I was with my family.b8fb17c4130e6eea

Until that day came.48cd4c399f558ff2

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That day, the 76eb70bd64 day my lovely c085056130 world turned upside b4f2768a15 down.bde7e174ac601668

I was f59879b49b on my 705013e43f way to ecdd32dea9 home after 16de03faf2 running an 5ae01dcdfa errand for 3784cd4b23 my mother.3363b8e8712f9689

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(Laughing) hee hee 10e9949729 hee!a00699733b7b1d92

Even when the c552466e3a carriage suddenly stopped 51436ffe18 beside me on 03be333d2a a narrow road, 0c7f9434bf I was humming 43dd6a3933 along with an f5cdcaa617 envelope full of a235ce05df bread.b38e7da919dd1b24

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It was when b9c7ce1b8f a strange woman 7863200ccc stood in my 7f8c6824ba way and stopped f72e713c78 me.7d71252c1105fdd2

[Helena! You’re alive, my daughter!]

A middle-aged woman hurriedly got off the carriage that stopped next to me, hugged me and started crying. She called me ‘Helena’.275ac6783ed1b219

[Me, Madam? I’m not Helena.]

I was embarrassed a576eddb75 and tried my d584c673d0 best to pull 20b56db61d her off.f0b23b5ca21e81f9

However, I, a 00f9c3e409 commoner, could not 4d81db06c5 use my power 273d94e413 properly to her, 688823a3cb who was clearly 6c477ee6ec a noble.fa7f26d207bf26f2

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My feeble attempts c5c1916090 were in vain, 06cca0c8ef and I had 384249b1a6 to be held 4fe02cd2ba captive by her.b16e31608f47c917

[Ma’am!]

Then, the man 1e8ebcc512 who got off 9caa02cd1b the carriage ran 83b9d60253 to the woman c5b95a7f4c who was hugging 06bbfe1ce5 me.1f5af0f1decf6b89

I sighed inwardly. I was c124a9f434 relieved to d64b4219f5 think that 722d70faeb I could 7b91fd46aa get away fff00086c3 from this b2f6172ad1 strange woman fd1a4ce4a8 now.8188a1be87e0e13b

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[Madam, Helena is dead!]

As I expected, the 7b2ad5613b man pulled the woman a617e1c105 who had been holding a73b316826 me suffocatingly tight.9e83aecaa16a3474

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[Ah, no! No, Helena!]

The woman 4f73cfd74d was caught 42690d40ae by the b7149b5a9f man and 99b626d805 fell, but ef93c3560f she reached f896cfc9d5 out her 34c414e80a hand to 3fe0c8a21b cling to 8fe5890c9a me again.cf5d67c6b9cdbf97

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I was scared 804fe702e5 of the woman 5efb793295 who was so 42843506da obsessed with me.91f6e5f67eefa916

I carefully 3373483a8b backed away 555f7d1be5 and tried 7134e7e516 to run 9e57c2ce31 away.9b45aab082f9d64b

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Unfortunately, this time, however, I was captured by the woman’s husband.413076961a304e9e

[Helena?]

The man facing me, 028544df56 holding my forearm, widened 42867ff3e5 his eyes as if f2a0bde81d he had seen an 500e37f5c3 unbelievable sight.1f2626f59932771b

The blood had disappeared c64f677a59 from his face and 3ab6b11561 turned blue, as if 3dc8d66e37 he had seen a f728e2daba ghost.db43f91eba17e139

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I didn’t know until later. To them, I was really like a ghost.866703737d83e5e0

But at that time, I couldn’t possibly know what was going on.5d918996b7992d96

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So I 5eca7c2045 felt uncomfortable 2e0cba8556 with the a60bfcbc9d incomprehensible emotions d04f6a29fb contained in 4519aa3072 the two 0d468c6fec pairs of 8a6e0ed716 eyes towards b1a1f1c214 me.36caeb1f8ef50b36