UBC Ch26

“Explain.”2d354ee2a717e206

For ten minutes, it e829090993 was the same situation, d153b87d8a the same question. Having succumbed to 8ec7f9c8da his unreasonable command, 05f7593f4b I was dragged eb943c95c1 to the main 9e739f80a2 hall and sat e60d30df58 there, crumpled.1d62472620c24b60

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“I don’t want to.”7b0159ea03f34e6d

“So, you just don’t like me.”7a402e822b06b705

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“Ha.”b6e343926dd657fc

Whether the man knew it or not, he had a coolly handsome face when he kept his mouth shut. Fortunately, as Kang Eui-tae’s teacher during the previous summer vacation, I could hold my head high and wield my boldness. Moreover, I knew that he couldn’t treat me carelessly. This meant that the worst things that could happen in a male-female relationship, like violence, were unlikely.2e8faf3323818def

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“Why is money the ultimate solution? Ugh, it’s so annoying. Why do I have to say these things to a man older than me?”e976dc131543fdab

“You don’t like the phone either, you don’t like the money.”71fec012ae67e514

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“It’s not that I don’t like them. How many times do I have to say it? It’s just a matter of the heart. There’s no sincerity in it. And the amount of money is excessive. I don’t know how I’m supposed to accept something like that. That’s why I’m angry.”125edfe121e3bec4

“You want me to smooth it over with a few words? You act like you know everything to me. Are you stupid?”d85eb5bcf14a9b5f

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“Ha!”139089f96f964e1d

I scoffed, implying that I couldn’t respect his words. Kang Eui-tae was leaning against the sliding door, looking at me with disdain. He couldn’t believe that I could repay my drunken debt with a thank you. Our sighs came from the realization that we couldn’t understand each other, but also didn’t have the ability to perfectly persuade the other.9ac0397f1b96d2c4

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“Anyway. And the phone bill too.”a79e4ebdf62056ad

“Just use it.”5108ebe059100740

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“My mind is pretty much made up to refuse.”2478181f50aa1fdb

“I gave it to you because I was lonely.”01345de8752bb040

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To my words about ae736c7d6e whether he could just 8d16e9c483 throw things at me, fc887c7310 Kang Eui-tae responded emotionally. My gaze, which 1e58f129b7 had been fixed 5c3ff602ce on the closed 85d5b54abe gate, turned inward. The man who had c0c5407d69 been sitting there asking 0e312e35ee what was wrong with 672027b63c money and a phone 9cbefc9dfe was now talking about 2a88da74d9 loneliness.8c071db64f6b424e

“Usually, you call. When you’re bored, when something good happens, when money comes in.”7e72dd848b35ac81

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“…Don’t you have any friends?”f4ec4b133abf0662

“You’re here. My friend.”193cd267942f9aef

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I had 51510a8e1f never considered bb6558153b the man 1a2d67b623 leaning against 9cb4bb6cb0 the sliding dc22caeb7d door with 1a5b53c3c1 an awkward bf7e86b06c smile as 8a878b7be1 a friend. But, funnily 0f444b53a1 enough, his f2c144b6f6 words moved 2a67ad9eca me. The embarrassing feeling I 52df4d12c9 had when he gave f6222ed872 me a lump sum 728203e556 of money was somehow b186f18599 making me try to 1808fc506c understand him.38c5e06dfb6f5780

The summer 402a9756c0 breeze came 120efc29cb in, passing a72752b418 over the 8bb1fe2ea1 back of 18457a4651 his hand 5ce3b75bf3 as he a609ea6c62 nervously chewed 58f15c8b33 his nails. Kang Eui-tae waited af78d1b442 patiently for my a6ec5ba350 answer. The phone bill, the 280fc02419 price of the device b2242efd46 itself. The numbers 19281e4095 with zeros 004b6706d7 attached were a0a0833e31 erased, and 2206c924eb only one 8c329e23bf word in 9c82c4aa04 Korean remained. Friend.ca45db6df1ffde94

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“Can I use it until graduation and then give it back? My mom said she’ll buy me a phone when I go to college.”17e815d26746272f

“Sure.”e257ba4752f5b5cb

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“Don’t call too often. Especially when you’re drunk.”21568e43c165bbf4

“Okay.”73b6a09c439c8d68

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“And from now on, let’s ask each other before visiting. That was the most uncomfortable part. Now that things have turned out this way, let’s use the phone properly.”28a2fbca1f99a48c

“Complicated…”e962a4bf64731676

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“Are you already annoyed?”2247f63752edb965

When I e7d771fb0c glared at 7491b5a108 him reproachfully, b92bc11a78 Kang Eui-tae 90fcf0279d immediately changed 86fa71d705 his expression bf107511d2 and slowly f6f0aac88d shook his 09abf420a5 head. The phone e96e035458 issue was 3789f11fb8 resolved surprisingly 48f18d31a1 quickly. The next task was c9f697d025 inside the phone. I took 6025a01db1 out the c7579cb0d2 child I 6b3164649f had hidden 36be429c61 deep in 9610b50551 my pocket.ba02163fcd782754

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“Why on earth are you Kang Jang-mi? A smokescreen? Or is it some kind of operation name?”c0149267360868fe

“You said you liked roses.”2fa5729b58ad0515

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I thought the ‘Kang Jang-mi’ incident, which I had imagined all on my own, would end on such an anticlimactic note. But saying that my favorite flower was a rose felt somehow cowardly. Kang Eui-tae had revealed his loneliness to me and tied our ambiguous and complicated relationship to the perfectly wholesome concept of friendship. Perhaps it was because his words had resolved some of my worries. When I was in a good mood, I was talkative.6b96882e2c13d629

“Actually, there’s something else I really like.”b74b180e446ab706

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“…Sunflowers?”9e72282b913221c7

“No.”5c42a5bb6dbaec3c

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“Dandelions?”6f6d69cb234c1865

He didn’t even care that I was lying. The fact that he was trying to guess from the flowers he knew made him suddenly seem cute, and my heart was filled with generosity.18060952cf143fd1

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“When I was little, it was Parents’ Day, so I saved up my allowance. I saved for three months to buy the biggest carnation pot from the flower shop downtown that I had my eye on. But I lost it at school. I must have bragged about it too much. Someone might have taken it, or I might have lost it. I was just so upset on the way home from school that I couldn’t move my feet.”1f753510d28203b2

It was definitely in my bag until the second period. I, who was maintaining the concept of a timid and kind class president, didn’t have the courage to confess to my homeroom teacher that I had lost the money. Why did I bring so much money and not take care of it? Afraid of the homeroom teacher’s scolding with a pointer, I lingered in front of the flower shop empty-handed on the way home from school. If I broke my piggy bank, I could buy about one flower. I was going to promise the owner that I would bring the money tomorrow and take just one flower.53391ddd565738a0

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“Just one carnation…”619a8a34a34b7d0e

“Huh? Why just one? You said you were going to buy that flower basket and told me not to sell it.”11ec60d05e3eb839

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The shame, embarrassment, and sorrow I felt at the time were as hot as covering myself with a blanket in the sweltering heat. I couldn’t say anything and just pouted my lips, shedding thick tears. Then, the owner’s hand with a bandage on it picked up the carnation flower basket and gave it to me, hesitating.78288718b5152acc

“I’ll give this to you as a gift because you always greet me so nicely. Take it carefully so you don’t lose it.”2e818072d57a239b

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Unexpected misfortune can also bring unexpected fortune. The feeling of holding a single carnation in my arms, the feeling of running home from school in May and opening the front door, the feeling of seeing my mom smiling happily and hugging me. To me, flowers symbolized celebration and happiness. Until the fourth grade of elementary school, I would buy snacks on the way home from school and stop by the flower shop. That’s where I learned. The names of the flowers, the flower language, the scent of the flowers, the excited expressions of the customers waiting for their wrapping. I used to say that I would become a flower shop owner when I grew up, with sparkling eyes.4b6cedb2b7e7d3cc

“Orchids purify even the heart of the person who grows them. The flowers that bloom are so beautiful that happiness is doubled.”a8f6a16f5e6f1fe6

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The delicate appearance and fragrance of the orchid that the owner showed me enriched my life even more. Isn’t that what an unforgettable memory is? A memory that suggests a direction in my life.a9f86e6f5d6f372b

“So, when I grow up, I really wanted to be a flower shop owner who grows a lot of orchids.”25f4a7640bd8344c

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“You can do it.”ac21be5efb0950e1

“My mom will hate it. So will my aunt. They told me never to do self-employment. They said it’ll ruin my health. Then I won’t be able to have pretty babies or meet a good husband.”78eab038c9cfd899

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My mom and aunt’s repertoire was always similar, but the conclusion was one. To live the life of a rich housewife instead of suffering. If I just avoided what they told me not to do, I could get on a high-speed train and arrive at the finish line. I wondered if I had rattled on too much, saying this and that, and bit my lip with my front teeth. Kang Eui-tae, who had been listening like an enthusiastic listener, reached out his hand. I flinched, thinking he wanted to hold my hand, but he said confidently, “Phone,” making me feel like an idiot. Without thinking, I took out my phone and put it in his hand. As soon as he received my small, white phone, he quickly pressed the keys. In less than 10 seconds, the phone was returned to me, and the screen showed161828a6aa28f777

[Kang Nan-cho (Orchid)]

Instead of [Kang Jang-mi (Rose)].

Embarrassed to 06a33cdef5 see me e32f437750 snickering, Kang 4aeaad3f17 Eui-tae lowered d1b43e3f4f his head d7af3f63fa and rubbed 1021b59621 the back 710d2f18e0 of his c2a82c80b8 neck.83f8e09f6ac0dd45

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“Don’t think too much, live the way you want to. How long do you think you’ll live?”e89802e4d29ebbfb

Kang Eui-tae’s face, which had stretched his neck out and then lifted it up again as if stretching, looked peaceful for once. The moonlight gently wrapped around his fingertips as he closed his eyes, feeling the breeze.8dc3e2d8067ec984

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The carefree words of people who live without thinking. I couldn’t dismiss it as just a casual remark because his younger sibling had really left without living long. I couldn’t add a single word to his lesson, which he must have learned painfully.0c7ebff7918bb45a

“What did you save me as? Kang Nan-cho’s brother?”ea74e035d1ae578e

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Kang Eui-tae just shrugged his shoulders and didn’t give any other answer. Probably just my full name, blandly. Suddenly, I laughed. It was a day when Kang Eui-tae’s thoughts and words made me laugh.7350bbc0c881fab8