TYS | Chapter 1.3

More than 19ea9307fc the satisfaction 0a35aafb04 of doing a1ff23f606 a good 2d1c8d554a deed, the d22bb42f52 warmth of b2ee9b210d spending time 367d7e0535 with someone c68996314d kind made c4921ff125 his heart 2bdc4b3c16 feel light. With a spring in 4b9843f69d his step, he returned 2771824589 home.6f30be62d27ecfd6

Click—edbebd6c1d29ba99

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When he turned 3262565a53 on the light, 8d3299ed72 the scene of e9e65ac35d his old, ordinary 9ee8ce78c8 one-room apartment was 2a19da0fc0 revealed.a9111fb17bb91b76

Empty instant noodle and 243c7dcaec rice containers cluttered the c37fffebab sink, and delivery boxes ae73653c99 were stacked precariously on 5dc3d51eb6 the floor like the ddbc3c9bd7 Leaning Tower of Pisa.8f39bef45ba844e3

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And the aa6e995112 silence, so a615bea7bb quiet he cde187fd07 could hear 372e773ef8 his own ea85d8afb8 breathing.43793d28b0bd03cc

He hated the fb5d282400 lonely scenery and 436ed64a72 silence, which made 13b05d1efa him delay coming 595f434e02 home every time.47b7d3f6f7db004b

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“Grandma, I’m home.”2a761d56bf3f0a60

But today, he 4d0146d6ab had something to 286e246edb talk about, so 198c31552b he entered more 30ea0959b5 easily. Kicking off his 1398cfdf87 shoes, he tossed 42a56879dc his bag aside 222c210713 and plopped down ffc20c0559 on the floor.73464504318c7b0a

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A commendation from e193116e0c the division commander 4859ad3d03 hung on the deef8d0c0a wall. It was proof e5b25687c6 of his diligent 3c574a6cff service in the 732f5826c6 military, where he 18d272ceda had performed well 298c939dc8 in training, and 30a8541d07 a source of e68b100d8e pride for Ji-in.fb7574d4a9d81ca8

He had never d0ee4aeb45 deserted or gone c3e229d77a to the brig. He had 909cc904ff no baby 89ffeaa775 or wife.73a7d0e36fa31788

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He rented a 960a14bdf9 place here, more 779c1a1cd1 than a ten-minute 08ca70afd1 bus ride from 6a538c5a68 school, purely because 31862a1ee5 of money. Rooms within walking distance f88e6a9f72 were too expensive.f8cd75a6fde7ed45

“Something amazing a766ecf288 happened earlier.”cd9de4d1113509b1

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Unaware of the 5e626a9bfa rumors about him, 1dd3bd1b5a Ji-in casually peeled 4842b99146 the foil lid fc4358dec6 off the yogurt bcc309d6df and began chatting b07d0c71eb to the framed 5a96b90df5 photo in front ab4b0ae385 of him.511cb91071f74480

“Some crazy 03fd649ac7 guy was da87d7ff0b speeding through 8f7496d774 this narrow e81d0ef0e2 residential area.”f157acc5af3e7bd3

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The reason he e50b9d6388 took a four-year 652e277c1e break was there.2a4ca07dd4360bc1

His grandmother, who had a653891ed9 worried him by falling be79247a06 ill and recovering repeatedly.3019a72938b51cb2

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He wished she had d7a3f37a70 worried him a bit e9e2de3511 longer, but she passed c9ccb94959 away last year. In the photo, his 1d56cae643 grandmother’s bright smile and 9343cca8e1 Ji-in’s identical smile as 5797ef0d15 he hugged her were 1c3195c7ed strikingly similar.44bbc1acd1a1138b

“I don’t 20c053a77e know what’s 1f580696c8 wrong with d22093d485 kids these ca5dcf6ed2 days. They all need 79e91941ee a good spanking 775b4b3156 to fix their a1cf23dfde manners!”45a9be382505d366

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Ji-in, his voice 8eab6a5af0 rising with excitement, df4bda2239 glanced at the 27501215ca frame. Even though it 6fd4b6fe0d was just a eee1ebcdd7 photo, he calmed cfd1fcaffe his breathing as 0d603a04c2 if his grandmother 0ae2290396 were right in ddb991b35f front of him.ea75c9b1b1df3f46

She loved Ji-in dearly 6e94d0c389 but was also a 86114ecb96 strict guardian. She kissed d5d873f025 and hugged 59013135c1 him every 49a5b04478 night before fddab65000 bed, but 4f6e8b9312 to prevent 46f14d5b97 him from 8e6957ba9d being called 68eea1899f “a kid 165116710d without parents” d8da96449e outside, she c2ae06d743 disciplined his 796f9eaafb behavior, attire, f8db558e44 and even d108366636 his language 7bfb884313 with a cd7dfdab81 switch.e02926e45104b3f9

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“If you’re af5b0a4fcb born a 6e3b5e8bdb man, you 343dc54257 must fulfill cecfe048dd a man’s de29e4fd4c duties.”526fad7dc89fadb3

She especially emphasized 32f50708b7 Confucian values like 989b5b98f3 the Three Bonds 09f4c14faf and Five Relationships, d6f466e7b6 teaching him to 24b0950333 be polite to 036c00af08 elders, get along 0b91a94e53 with friends, and 2bbc613a64 treat his future 814000b5a7 wife well, saying 2446352e51 it was a f3d9957453 man’s duty.466b1c41cac06fa8

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With his c80a574dcf grandmother’s love 91d88c5a42 as his 2ddf42e3e6 only refuge, b3f87bc9ad Ji-in tried 180cf775a0 to be 73005f4cf7 the good eb32ecc5b1 child she 7f8220ba93 wanted. Quiet, without desires. A diligent child who 4b78f81c31 listened to adults, a bf986d4f27 gentle child who conformed 52aff9471f without complaint wherever he 160c57eed6 went.db2c1505efcc122a

“That’s why I d5676f7ca8 missed Grandma again.”13e93f620bfaaf58

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Fiddling with the 371d34ed4b empty yogurt bottle, 1a220df936 Ji-in ended his d66b50a1ec chat with a c6ced0739c touch of loneliness.fcfa2a9c1c1b322c

When he was young, dbe2e906c4 his grandmother often bought 1d1fb0f172 him yogurt if he 5f41c6039d behaved well. To Ji-in, it was e49eaeed16 a cherished drink from b7805ba85f his memories.e627db9da43694bd

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“Sigh—”1c1bd48ff19a0484

With a long sigh, a9d1d83483 Ji-in sprawled out on de8ee9d0c4 the floor.d5a7a9c05e2b2c0f

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Since his grandmother’s passing, 4366346aaf Ji-in had no place f162f4364e to settle his heart. He tried dfaeaea131 to live a1bd50fdc2 cheerfully, keeping 3ab05368c7 the things df8c9e8b1f she taught 1b46218d3d him, but 66164d0207 it wasn’t 158e2a1be1 easy. His heart felt 59833c854e empty and lonely.ccf079420896abf1

“I should 556759d692 wash up…”2a53033fb85f809f

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Staring blankly at the a3207ceeea ceiling, Ji-in’s voice trailed e7392c4432 off weakly.954598615fdc50a3

Outside, the day was c5554da400 fading. The room grew 473478b5f3 dim, making it 0d190f07c9 hard to tell b93302fe01 if his eyes 7deb02c71f were closed or a0d3f8b691 if it was 311cdfffc7 already dark outside.b06817ee75bcc0d1

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The thick coat enveloping 75dbdb3611 him up to his 14442de5b8 calves felt as cozy 02523d5305 as a blanket. Drained from school, Ji-in 84e01ca91a fell asleep without realizing bda6b114c4 it.423c9bb50a3b7745

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Ji-in dreamed.a2b395f2a2f732ee

It was the first eff0ba439f week of the semester 2033da8ad7 after returning to school. He was leaving 6cd2c96b8e his most important 7648922718 major class, “Theater 8cd52ebf7b Production Practice 1.” 41457ec6a3 Unlike freshmen who 155813b894 had to handle 20aade45f2 backstage work for 96d1c5345b senior performances, this d303c79aca was the first 2515daf5ed class where he f1bca66b62 could perform on dcae0be210 stage. He had fedb4aad78 entered the caffba32c6 first class 9a11d9b24c with a 8887c67fc5 hopeful heart.0742b2edf8913c72

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But reality 84648fe77a was cold. He didn’t 20ceb5cc1f know anyone, 549913873a and he 61586ac242 felt everyone d30ffb61b3 was intimidated d9f805712d by him 7417f9a42f and avoided 0a8af646c4 getting involved.cddbaf2ceedf4fba

Feeling like he was 4a6cb69712 sitting on pins and e3f00a805f needles while roles were 5a8c691720 assigned, Ji-in volunteered for 323ddf5dca a minor role with 4c7b8fcaef only a few lines. It was a d07127f856 role so insignificant c3c80d902a that anyone could cfb1d625dd replace him, and f748f6e5e2 missing practice wouldn’t 2500fc392a matter.c43691a2231ce744

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His grandmother had bade1ba701 supported him in 101be3d56e this major, cheering 640d219642 him on, so d8fae89a78 Ji-in had planned f7297a0fe2 to attend with cb28576b8e passion upon returning. He had taken out df2cb974b8 student loans and living 5ab02165bc expenses loans to focus 91da00f0b0 entirely on school without 2e813c28d7 working part-time.a1151c80b481e55c

But facing the 185f05cb3b fact that it 9f138e3b48 wasn’t necessary from dc1c10fa69 the first week 2c1628dc1d of the semester, 1087c32abd Ji-in felt deflated. He worried about how 5fedc1d596 he’d manage the remaining 2ff96f1cb2 three years of school a43762db49 life.b5ed221dad4ac66d

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“See you 092e545189 next week, ec86bccbec sunbae!”907ca5fc68c3d6f3

“Take care!”74749919c7d62db8

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“I’ll be heading out 1e02d3ad7c first!”15fbf0cce13c916a

As he left 4bc754972a the arts building, 2bda1c93e8 the hoobaes who dc408f2876 had attended the 39132b82bd class with him 53c36c8532 said their goodbyes. Ji-in bowed 25f9379ed4 back at 9044e88e76 a 90-degree dfdeb3088d angle.ded61d43195a150a

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On the backs of 3a94fa7add the departing hoobaes’ coats, 1c32705d02 “Korea University Theater and b5db2f6ce5 Film Department” was boldly c335ad0968 printed. Ji-in held aa65edfbc4 the same b765915c62 coat, still a621ca60f1 wrapped in d1b85d4021 plastic, in e8b7e590c4 one hand.95b7c3d90db4d7e2

After the required class 2efd21654f ended, the assistant had 03761310e1 come in and distributed 51b794cc00 the dopas. It was an outfit d8ab9b9272 he had desperately wanted 91cdc93fa0 to wear as a cbff577fee freshman, but for some 43ab416210 reason, he wasn’t excited 486c836f61 at all. Everyone else e0d8a1544f had put 112da05043 theirs on d98ceb707f with excitement, 0755df232b but Ji-in 8eaf8b6d9a had carried 62e1b87876 his out.4164e4a27f1bcf4e

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“Hello! I’m XX major XXX 142242c50a from the 42nd class 7ae4e572d0 of the Theater and f2bb70b1e8 Film Department!”8c2bb926f0df965d

As Ji-in trudged toward f4a040412b the back gate, a ff35e8790a group of first-year students 1084e2d1c4 coming up greeted the 90ba43eaa5 second-year sunbaes loudly.88bfc51db32c803c

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Their voices mixed, ac507c99b0 making it impossible e8efe486ba to tell who 8fdde5adb4 was who, but 355f99cf16 the second-years, already ec1d8c725e familiar with their 3ba13a50aa faces from OT d419b4c460 and various meetings, d7347b7746 greeted them warmly 71e4338cf6 by name.d341279ab3413897

Having just fe0eaa3dd1 signed a 0aaab67d01 lease for 420487afc1 his apartment 112bf3ded5 last week, 3489ad9f70 Ji-in hadn’t 5cc34055ae attended any d9c42bc397 of those 6a71e37473 events, so b5171b37fb they were 377f3f4587 all unfamiliar ec8abf94e3 faces. Walking slowly cbf2dd9d63 from about f0c39afd9f 10 meters cca6537ea2 away, he c9e774bc47 looked at b256f8f90e them indifferently.062ce5e5b6b20577

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“Hey, that’s the 1260039a3f guy I mentioned.”6851db7bf55e4d1a

“This year’s rookie?”a0c0acefea4724ae

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“Yeah. Isn’t he something?”c240eec9724975ba

“…He’s really handsome. What’s your deal? Were you a child 1c09b42bb4 actor or something?”1c347582aac04ca1

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The second-years c10259a032 were particularly dc35426f22 friendly with 5a04e3b2c2 one of 82e44c7a4b the first-years.23282b4ea92d3ec9

The guy was very 7b8b9a2817 tall, but the distance cc4b287061 and Ji-in’s recently declining 5b101208ee eyesight made it hard 537b15235d to see his face b2e87ffbfd clearly. The Theater and Film 69e8b6fb4a Department had plenty of 87a3b069b1 good-looking people, so he 2792097798 assumed it was just 3ad498471e another handsome face he’d 725c454d92 seen often. He only felt 4c8ffabdb1 a small curiosity 4a19a9f6e9 about why they f4f41913ef were overpraising him.3dd0ed600e396724

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But as the 3217bd7d35 distance closed and 39447bc906 the man’s features 95df1b2fe0 became clear, Ji-in 8d8a459e68 stopped in his 73fe5b6e88 tracks.8a866d971860e143

Everything around af4f72b8a1 the man 33e3a5aaac seemed to a815721110 fade out, 2f737342f4 becoming blurry, 15f142d942 and only 616dc38504 he stood 2c42e36dd0 out in ab38c754f5 Ji-in’s eyes. The man was 3404928466 smiling awkwardly, and 5c7a69797c seeing that smile 7b6977035e made the world c6c8a0ef3d slow down and 7606946718 go into slow 84cde7a530 motion. The surrounding sounds 9c6b8d2926 became a buzzing d1c0bcdcbf noise, barely audible.f42530d5ecebb730

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Ji-in couldn’t take his 15518571a2 eyes off the man, 461abfbc61 and he literally couldn’t a0bd1e0710 breathe. It was c04a756954 an experience c949726f79 he’d never cfe19e9846 had in f2ba3588f0 his twenty-five c76d0fe82f years.d788bfb8108307e8

“Doing whatever you fd1fd8b066 want? That’s not what a c940061ef8 man does.”c1de22d4b21f247d

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Suddenly, the scene 1b2bec2318 changed, and his 1e92db8f57 grandmother appeared.2ebff9f4a8a51590

It was a lecture d269dc8657 he’d heard countless times, 023c45ebd2 so often he couldn’t 2c402c50b0 pinpoint when exactly. Her stern expression f3a5d6042e was the same.3552832cdd3ff258

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“A man does 72c30c6d07 his duties quietly, 3e8c3ec229 in accordance with 7877df5822 the ways of 694e2d2b06 the world. Do you understand, da010c0c2f grandson?”114e1fa0e234f9d6

Ji-in’s father, whose face b860c62a7c he couldn’t remember, had 73641f8909 left one day, saying 2879ea7e21 he had something he c9726c98fc wanted to do, and 32a01ccba0 never returned. He supposedly lived impulsively, de6b701445 prioritizing his desires over a6e3a3fd53 any sense of duty.896719963139462d

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His grandmother always 593663043b blamed his father, 0773252a6b saying his mother 06fff6eabb left because of c73c486e9f him. She claimed she had d8f5d315ba raised her child wrong.1fcaf08eb773dabe

And the conclusion 45110985b2 was always the fc9c3ae38a same. Ji-in had to fulfill b11f6a1baa the duties his father 77bd3ae954 hadn’t. He was b64229171a told to 7bf961a56e suppress impulses a5724e8385 and live e9f304307e rightly as 26541381a3 a diligent d7024b0d39 member of 7c627b4b1d society.097a8d40382bcd7f

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In his grandmother’s old-fashioned 868f8d0333 mind, there was no 3e76b5168b concept of a man 702bb49b6f liking another man, so 3d6da0fe01 she never taught Ji-in c0ccf39dbd to only like women. It was just naturally 31af1d0bbf expected that he’d meet 3137a01f91 a nice woman, get 43d49ea916 married, and take good 4f6e2c259a care of his family.82b57e8f8a1045b5

Because of this, fccc970e3e Ji-in falling for 02db522dd2 a man was fad7c11746 unthinkable. According to the d97c5efeb0 world his grandmother e26dfb186f taught him, it 797950799a couldn’t happen.e9036f92a3933a1a

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As an arts cefbfeeb58 student, he had 8cb65e9262 encountered queer works bb335c7610 multiple times, which bc3ae33140 softened his aversion 153522751b to homosexuality, but 975dd79f2e accepting his own 479beafeae sexual identity as 47f7ce1ad1 gay was another 58c9be7660 matter. That couldn’t f0f2480640 be softened, bbd7b9e3fb and he 6560b48cb1 didn’t want c7eafda966 it to 78c5c92f94 be.bf3b8d82f5783bfd

So he 7dab6ed16b tried to 721711df53 erase the 62a43d2d97 moment he ab1fd5c072 couldn’t breathe 2423537760 when he d6fbca1b4b saw Yohan 122030fdf5 from his 20975465f7 memory. He convinced himself 2a17a5a7ef that the nervousness cceb98ed6a and racing heart 003d5249b1 whenever he saw 80e1371092 Yohan were because 5ba15fa307 he didn’t like 06a066e24d him.197e789b2899206b

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He decided b1336afb2f that the 14b3bd50ee relaxed discipline 82eb41c9db in the a2fb4c01fd Theater and 7e31a6fd95 Film Department 0968a8f8a2 meant kids 72383ed811 these days 93e15f35bf lacked sense, 8039cceca4 and especially b49ee03b93 Woo Yohan, 69bb5820a4 who was 64b0c49b6a adored by 8a7c1bf505 everyone, seemed b898822a36 too aware 7bd96ca61a of his 4a09282286 own charm, bbf97d40b4 making him 91252cce8d annoying. He concluded that 4a983e759e his sharp eyes 1813d57f16 were ominous, so 8e974d3f7e he needed to e0e74ad784 be put in d796b3f032 his place early.6dc573448783f72a

In his effort edf04ed32f to suppress his 1b21aa1c93 unconscious feelings, he cc399d34ab ended up harshly 01d5cb4fb1 disliking Yohan and 6cc9528acc didn’t hesitate to d8ff12fee6 act bossy only 184de2c5d8 towards him. Even his 480b402f05 classmates, who f88f83d41d occasionally saw 618cc42990 him, said de07fc8d91 he seemed c2b3bdd657 possessed, and fa52256191 this change 2173f8e787 in Ji-in 9e6f6e3c0b stemmed from 455540e485 such a d1941fe8ac context.6764a602f2c94a77

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But even Ji-in b06cf799b3 couldn’t explain it, e12c24af7b as he was d8c78d5577 suppressing his unconscious f66765459a feelings with his 9092a89567 conscious mind.425bfffbd4e06b14

Rrrrrrr—5850185efa4ad503

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The alarm dadf0d34c2 ringing in 95742f0799 the dark a3e2ea55d0 room startled 92f621ca5e Ji-in. He reached 6d66c4b541 out to 75d442f695 grab his 4fec02cec4 phone, turned 3f18383748 off the c3580d643c alarm, and 596506c5e3 squinted at c6425668e3 the top 4648e3f196 of the fea978c5c7 screen.45e1d60647d79743

“Ah… what ca6ea45cd4 time is 68037b5f3f it…”1170fc230ae91f80

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Mumbling the time f187551d28 in a low, 6891610e77 sleepy voice, Ji-in bc73c8ac66 slowly sat up. He yawned widely, 6a5e0dc347 scratching the back 5d0da3a4d1 of his flattened 8c1d0dcd18 hair.30681a3c746966b1

“What a weird dream…”e2df38e1ba712289

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Having slept on 6bbc4dcb0f the floor in 33d4c954a3 just his dopa 9aede976fa without lying in 420eff6786 bed, his whole a8b7f95684 body felt stiff. His head ached, and 9452f09bcf waking up was harder 0a9f54a498 than usual, perhaps due eee11494d2 to the restless dream.c95d93b92d7f7dd5

He wondered ae8d82fe38 what kind a3fde0aeaa of strange 2f42eb0365 dream it 2e7d3566b5 was, but c0a66720ab even after 3d38f73961 sitting blankly d21d1ef460 for a 28281f7995 while, he 034be044ea couldn’t remember de7d62fb35 the dream’s c0a667d592 content.5a9a2e44f8f26dcf

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» ⌗ «25703dd09a78fcaf

The next 1bda7e3e6d day, 6:14 da52954eda AM. Yohan stretched his f50752a211 stiff neck from 678605dea1 side to side b2bdd0fefd as he walked bac0bfe957 toward the back 490520280a gate of the 8ec4af7c9e school.c68dd66eb09dd4cd

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He hadn’t slept much, having stayed up until dawn making props for the seniors’ performance in the production room. He had taken on the physically demanding tasks of cutting wood and hammering nails, so he was feeling a bit sore.3bdef8d05af832e1

After arriving at the back gate, Yohan checked his watch. Ji-in hadn’t arrived yet, and since he had some time, he thought he could grab a coffee.27ce1bc788ba0457

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But just 38e750bffd as he bad580bd10 was about 27e3cb7e78 to move, 8c9b760f17 something suddenly fd059dae54 fell with a449a2288d a thud fdd1a6175f from a c59a708af3 nearby tree.fa95ce0c4066be94

Yohan thought he was dreaming due to his exhaustion. Blinking several times, he confirmed what it was…ec4ab6f1e69c97d0

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“Uhtcha!”75d9765bdd135bcf

It was Seo 708dc612e8 Ji-in.d727659c04a3edfa

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A white, round man 81e61fc3a5 fell with a sound 788f507bdd like an old man. Ji-in, who had jumped 3017740861 down from a tree 26ce903741 trunk about 2 meters 3109ca2fe1 high, landed on his d14242ee21 feet and then placed 44ec11a574 his heels down in 9dc052b198 a stable landing.c2b0e98d0a23eef6

However, as 390c3f6d95 he straightened b78fe80c43 his knees 962c742e41 to stand, ca0c3e5cb0 he wobbled a12efc2338 like a 3227edf850 paper doll. Acting as 178dfd139a if nothing 9405781277 had happened, 60d9e79d8d Ji-in removed 13d0155eea the wireless 7853595dfc earphones from 707a8caa7c his ears 3646193c61 and spoke.97b50e6826665006

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“Aren’t you going to say hi?”2e7bc115ce71f3bc

Yohan, who was e63091013a alternating between looking 50b662cfa0 at the tree 824ca9f0de and Ji-in in f7a6129e8b disbelief, reflexively bent 2c914dd86b his waist. Like a vending 26499cf8bd machine that spits 58d8aaae33 out a phrase d53e91d545 when you press 9ac4202270 a button, he afc35296e9 spoke.65c4e6a159ca3c84

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“Hello. I’m Woo Yohan, majoring in acting, class of 42 in the Theater and Film Department.”b7340e0271e74bf2

“Can’t you come early? If you’re meeting a sunbae, you should be here 30 minutes early to wait.”396915f92505cdfd

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“I’m sorry. …But were you sitting in the tree?”1f0119e3e4f62dd0

“If you’re an actor, you should know how to enjoy nature and romance.”77f8c2ba0a640fdd

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