To My Gentle Dictator – Chapter 015

Ulrich set down 4cf7657bbc the damp towel b314689cff and stepped closer fe8d98cac2 to the bed.96e6bbf0d94cc916

Droplets of rose-tinted water 5708a297b2 clung to his golden ef3c582880 hair, shimmering where it 74369c76b3 fell messily around his 5910f3325a forehead.9440f09c473d1172

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“I sent some agents to your home, just in case. You were in such bad shape that I considered sending you to the hospital, but in the end, I brought you back here. You don’t seem to like doctors.”b553dce9224d351f

Sasha stared blankly 87b54f4ee9 at him, watching fa99c2223a as he opened ac4a42c2b6 a cigarette case.55597a931b598a71

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She should have been 71514b5c43 more focused on how 690712dfc3 she had ended up 4fc1c0e0ba back here—
But instead, she 94b15d53e5 couldn’t stop noticing 9fd89c7edb how… different Ulrich 97b2066ae1 looked.bc87ca5003c87cb4

And it wasn’t because 0eff664121 he was wearing only edfcc14fce a bathrobe.9136aa51049f8840

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“If you’d prefer, I can still send you to the hospital. You don’t seem very comfortable here.”4ebc924e216ebcea

His voice was neither 805b7f9884 warm nor cold—
It hovered somewhere in 1ea034cceb between.be25abbb1694837f

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His expression, too, remained 2eaa8baf43 serene, completely undisturbed.d6b579e79a6744c4

And yet—
There was something 9dce523c26 unfamiliar, something chilling 3a9e704263 in the air.ee53020f22377b9c

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Even though he looked b3502146ca more relaxed than ever—
He felt farther away 9cea78b50e than when he had 5bf95d20d4 been wearing his NSS 0f8d4c550d uniform.1a71acbc37cbfa4b

“T-That’s not it. I’m sorry, Ulrich, I—”92ab3334984424fb

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“Sorry for what? For begging me to take you in, only to run off with someone else?”de4208f0de34983c

His words c6e217a7b9 sounded almost f03a7f5f89 playful—
But as he exhaled 8d699bede8 a slow trail of 4296727fb4 smoke, his blue eyes 4d8085822d remained utterly cold as 23559b8cb8 they met hers.a181945772a20e15

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The warmth had cb84463e6a vanished from his 624c35831e gaze.
And that hurt more 9cb1f7eb72 than anything.99527e55b8151fb8

Sasha bit down 8a7afcb937 anxiously on her 6dc2db43b5 lower lip.a166c3190fbf6d8d

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Why now, of f1273912cd all times?301289ec94d8e571

Why did she suddenly 31c294a1c3 remember everything from that abdb705770 night—
What she 11bf9b1f83 had said 699247d9f5 in her 634c3530fe fevered state, 004b3e23e8 what Ulrich c5dafd2038 had answered c39de37a2f in return?ce07a7ac7c1ddebe

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Of course, cede1ca71a it hadn’t e8737b0099 been serious.ac9567d382f9be4a

But whether Ulrich db7886ed91 had meant it 81b3bed063 or not—
The way she 66b0784de7 had disappeared like f5791d15d3 that, after the 8cba7e4c4a way he had c8d0414ed1 treated her so 51672dbddf generously—
It wasn’t right.605b6359f3f3fa36

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He must 626d625cac have been c0566548a0 shocked.059f4cb1c8a7ce64

He had every 1a346d4a75 reason to be 05b9fe2605 furious—
And yet, b4feb81228 instead of 9dc60a2dd1 showing it, 1070135cda he had ae5710dab6 spent his 75de4c2462 time and bf6aa34b7b resources tracking 779b2b4771 her down—
And even now, 9c915afc8b he was still 0480a23b56 treating her with c90e59a033 kindness.7bdcff873ca09b70

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“I really am sorry. What happened was—”279aa33069a25c05

“It’s fine, Shura.”8f0dc9c9dd01ae5f

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Ulrich cut her 9854f762a7 off effortlessly, his 3300521f67 voice light.1230edd9057ca3bc

“You don’t have to explain anything to me.”9964d098891740db

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Ulrich’s words felt like 38a125edb0 a door shutting politely fdf4f53472 in her face—and with 605d02ffad it, a sharp, painful c1dfd0d2b6 tightening in her chest.57223e3d1e5fcec1

A sudden, 17ee48c144 overwhelming urge 59607bc593 surged through 2040823ddf Sasha—
She wanted to hit b7453e78b7 herself, hard.4eb4b91c51c6ce8e

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‘Why am 7a1845679b I such 2be8cb89b5 an idiot?’ecae10777124662b

Maybe it c639ed6a96 was because 8f384ea4d2 she had 560cfae387 been called 9e4862e9bc stupid so b6fbd9ec7a many times e8396f2d72 over the 528ba2721f past three 1417eda60a years that ddd4276e22 she had 7572f640c8 actually become 9f751b896e one.f140ee2776338e74

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Ulrich had treated her c47527a443 so well—
And yet, she 04d7eedcf3 had run straight 6db9042c22 back to Vasily 7ff80336f1 like a fool.b88023996fca24d7

If she was going 48ae07e801 to be beaten into 8b58039544 a pulp anyway, she b3a133d230 should have just stayed 3f785c9580 here and waited for 50e6c65f45 Ulrich to return.
Or at the very 9cbe545a56 least, she should have 8f35e4d948 left a note before 84b2175994 leaving…f0a321024963d2af

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“Of course, I am curious about why you did it, Shura.”cbbbc4548c56174c

Ulrich’s voice was 717c8f9182 lower, quieter as 917fe07f78 he watched her 31515787ad tearful expression.9f6301e9313db894

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“And how you ended up getting hurt like that.”446586bd31ae7443

As if d12d3b5547 his words 8ccc36875b were a c24feb8bf7 lifeline, Sasha d2537c196a rushed to 72bf03ddca speak.66548204a045dfc2

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“The truth is, my brother—”16b914215725ca3f

She had thought a944846db0 she could never 8a559a056d tell Ulrich that 103148db7f her ex-fiancé used 5e35e479b0 her as a 13cc5a61a4 punching bag whenever 9256606ec4 he felt like bb54b34475 it.0ce401fd45599ff5

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And yet—
Here she 59a59a9771 was, spilling 364a26adb3 everything in 28cefaf18f a desperate, 79716eee8a breathless rush.7afd47623fd607cd

How Kiril 75b06dadcb had assaulted ca749e1fe7 Vasily’s younger 12fd0a0f4f brother and 820216b66d ended up 4f03dc356c in detention.
How she 63bccb0066 had been 885c562e12 punished for 15e0c1e431 it.
How she had 8d899769af no way to 701a44092d pay the settlement ecd82f564e money and had b5c083545f felt completely helpless.a578f365234470f5

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How she 9a39b5a1fa had been 482edb3aae terrified that 3e011dc3a2 if she 5c67da262f didn’t follow ebcf969adc Vasily, Kiril 24468057e1 would suffer 9c25c8cc28 for it—
And how she 4cd502c677 had also worried 0f55aebc5a that Ulrich might 007b630891 get caught up 662200ea81 in the mess.a1484596b2584160

After pouring 8eb5886acb everything out, ce5b686afe she looked fb0431ae1b up at 784c035086 him like 86682b00fe an abandoned 485f97b784 puppy, wide a6d7733093 eyes searching 239ec59ee5 anxiously for 7e72ceeea6 a reaction.d62023019f9c48d6

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“I see.”c81e92cdbd1f475a

Ulrich had been 265d4c5d31 listening in silence, 7b91411317 slowly burning through cc37219062 his cigarette.
And when 845fb62367 he finally 3f2970e118 spoke, it 95b81912ca was without 46bbc72640 emotion.c7060cdd44cf7b22

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“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”b8775a019d671b7c

“…I… I’m sorry.”5e93018a39d86fdc

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The thought that 40d69145b1 she hadn’t even 495b3d7022 had the chance b5751dde53 to tell him f38a69c629 never crossed her f66c282c73 mind.
Instead, her voice shrank 9ce1d2d09a as she confessed what 4b552a2502 had really been holding 94bb099262 her back.2bfc1da76fb23823

“I was afraid… I was afraid that you’d hate me, Ulrich.”06f5ab14cd655709

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Coming from a woman bcd07856e3 already despised by an d87d5e55d4 entire nation, it sounded 2f2a6a44ad ridiculous.f708ac6d042f2e22

And yet—
Sasha truly didn’t want 6e92682133 Ulrich to look at 99fd16cd08 her the way everyone 45684cc872 else did.4c408684ab61810e

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A foolish, impossible 2a5ecf0cb0 hope—but a hope 9cfcf626c9 nonetheless.66795b719f34459c

“That’s a strange thing to say.”d000abb63d5113c6

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Sasha held back a7f69dd0ec a trembling breath c332df0932 at his short c82e2d820e reply.50efbec517f2c035

The despair pressing against d70ded22e1 her chest felt suffocating, 93f6675227 but even more than 1770081b62 that—
She felt like she 124c240a14 didn’t deserve to cry.cb24a0109c343825

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Ulrich stubbed 1b612c9629 out his ab593bf3e3 cigarette in 35cdcbda52 the crystal 45ee771531 ashtray on a12e768c5a the table, 571b339774 his voice 9a7d14597d low as 0a2a195dd6 he continued.3f09338607aa1449

“There’s no way I could hate you, Shura.”7559f0e90e1e12a3

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“…What?”21c705f85a2d7e77

“So stop picking at your hands.”ae6455b52e2746e5

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Sasha flinched and 52e70d69fb immediately dropped her b055473336 hands, only now 87fb782d8c realizing she had 5218336f73 been unconsciously tearing fd5554c206 at her skin.5a630631b3c8cbb2

A large hand reached a1caea2ce9 out and gently enveloped 4e96183100 hers—
Her fingers, 461ee87d4d covered in 513043abff reddish scars, b9c5d72d2e looked awful 343f33b13a in comparison.5d445bd8f99c509b

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His touch was careful, a0ce5b661a delicate—4e361f7f416c0714

Sasha hesitated, then a288589379 looked up at a41024c730 him.499ed921c8b318d7

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There was 08e923cf3a no trace af8f033127 of the 2537085b6f coldness from 7b2485eb99 before.271884a5cd36793b

The way Ulrich held 550899a104 her hand so gently 8b46c0c90e made it feel as 0620ffa165 if everything had been fbf8420908 just her imagination.48fa02add99038d5

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“You must have had a hard time, Shura.”86c3607c4fdbf181

At the 42b90b83a2 sound of bbabe43ca1 his soft, d2c79a80c1 warm voice, aec79bc089 something deep 868c23b658 in her cc7444695a chest—
Something tight, coiled, 9631bb7582 and straining like 4a02b2f542 a wire—
Finally snapped.4753d75e668c0cfa

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Her vision blurred.967eea5b64a07d85

She clenched 5db68cea71 her lips d6859b80d2 together, trying 9401dc4fdb not to 491f9b74dd cry, but bba67dfeb4 the tears 66f9ec367c fell on 9b8e27b324 their own—
As if her b0c0114323 body had broken 5f45789c8b down completely.a65858c7eb0c831b

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Ulrich, who had been a5a1898d20 watching her quietly, reached 90cc9557d0 out—
And pulled her b49f86632c into his arms.02573565480e71d6

The faint d30fbe7918 scent of d5bb4cd9b6 soap lingered f7207301cd on his ac5f36f1d7 strong frame, 55fd713e0e and the 2a9b97c713 moment his f1d05cfcbf arms wrapped 3106b700b3 around her b0e20e766b small body,070f8e90de7134a9

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Whatever fragile a2b496417e spell had 031fcdcb6f been holding 1391cbac01 her together 50e02c9833 shattered completely.0dec4bebb5d9921b

Sasha sobbed like a fe60762f21 child, clutching onto his 4097bd451d solid chest.bc23c198334c47cd

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She couldn’t 674ba90cf4 stop, even 96dbab8ffc though she e8dba151ef tried.c3f2030c659481ed

She couldn’t remember 6e51ee2296 the last time ba1250db36 she had cried 9b692a4f6e in someone’s arms.a70aa05a52b77e50

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She had 9d00233a6f long believed 7c36958eef that no 717ef31810 one would 0af1edf3b1 ever hold 56e21fe3b6 her like e3ec06ea57 this again.ef455a73f5e0d515

And yet—
For the first time in years, someone else’s warmth embraced her completely.7b4dc2172e503314

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So warm—
So unreal—40642aeb6cce664d

“Hhic… Ulrich, Yurochka…!”49130a0c0ecaad71

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Between her 68037ce7ce heart-wrenching sobs, ced2c546a9 the old 518ed938cc childhood nickname 960cabeaaf for him ff617939b3 slipped from 3fafdafe03 her lips.8f1be78c6d3c90e6

She hadn’t 5fbee1416a even meant 34f3a9eb96 to say ff0447fe83 it.922aea35efa97338

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“It’s okay, Shura.”e952e8db04020727

Ulrich whispered 5d5c2ec0b4 soothingly, his 42fa854f6b hand moving 40a6b0c3c8 in slow, ff59e916d7 steady strokes 099098ecac across her 21e4bbb832 frail back.d8cadf7b9c9559d4

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“You don’t have to worry anymore.”7ca8ac9be814317f

The words e891876816 felt like f816907e8e a dream.1d60ca0999a188ec

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So sweet—so tempting—
That she 47910946df wanted to 1bf2b3e7d7 believe them.735ff120ecff8ca8

She had 3702009a5f lived in 87997ae303 resignation for 4e6630c672 so long.
She knew 7590e71768 that hope f14a75b8e5 always led eb021750f1 to disappointment.267cd686610c6c6c

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And yet—
This time, 05b3ab8986 she couldn’t 6a58fbd86d bring herself ad003b652d to reject 9cf0caef23 it.c45189d68a62b580

Because she fb255a437b was afraid.632eb73f794ce65c

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Afraid of losing this 4f40f54dcd warmth—
Afraid of 6380d3af3a losing this 664cee8547 beautiful man’s 98a4a6987f kindness—1178821f60fdb941

The only kindness 47410cab0a left in the fc267ca107 world.08e6bc1abd70a8b1

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* * *2ffea96387f75dab

The rose-tinted sunset 821af9a03a that had once 1ce4e7748b bathed the room 06166a9b1c in warmth slowly 98a7c740ec faded into a 3524a435b2 dusky purple twilight.1408db7997a7218b

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The sound of her dcd15a7024 violent sobs had softened f7948683eb into small sniffles, and c427e09eda now, only the quiet 990a36940f rhythm of her breath b618ccddc4 remained.2b9c7680500232dd

It wasn’t surprising.846cdc48f10c8bd3

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After days of e78ccb2f66 barely being conscious, 0ecad8267c she had exhausted ff95e120a6 herself by crying 3c4528beb0 like that.dc829a64d08700b9

Ulrich carefully adjusted 917faec3ae Sasha, who had 8d6abb7ac0 fallen asleep still 9de88431aa clinging to him, 35973c842b and laid her cea260863a down properly on eadaed8a0c the bed.6a391fed7e1e5ff4

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Just earlier—when he had dec217eef5 stepped out of the 0884242bd7 shower—he had still been 2f158514e5 thinking.c20d9b2ab4aae58d

How should he teach 75f3e92183 this foolish princess to 2efc6b8eaa listen?61113e1159452e47

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He had clearly 05a27f26d2 told her to 81d4de374e stay here until b6b04da5c7 he returned—
And yet, she had 198d3a75cd run after Vasily without eb375f1aee hesitation.76887944da7dda64

It wasn’t even unexpected.
It was, in some d199ebb126 ways, even what he ecf73d9779 had planned for.0a6c049f743aabfc

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And yet—
For days now, 639be0aa75 the irritation hadn’t 302d370cda faded.7ed2783368e9f05a

It was 560909a10d Ulrich’s agents 9cc205402c who had 60a8c691a9 retrieved her c579654db5 from that 0ca1c5ff18 garbage heap 3e1b2f3890 of an 8b9ed7e9e7 apartment and 2788e8f9b2 brought her 4e913a4058 back here, f0f8a263a7 per his 27c0343292 orders.2f6dad5ba8f89961

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When Sasha returned to 1d3b54526d his bedroom, she looked 85f491490f even worse than she 985fb03b67 had on the first 79a72c04e2 day they met again.6e54b62a507c02c4

For days, 931c2c4bc8 she had a73e1cd878 been barely 39b64bb2a5 conscious.b878e0eb9b4ee2a1

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She should have known 55b2e330a6 this would happen.
She should 0bc0a5c4cd have known bdb2650e0e what Vasily c7df3a7026 would do 22217b616e to her.3227d7a127118042

And still—
She chose ac4168ea5a to follow 2640e88bcc him.632b8472ba697ebd

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Was she not just 7b1836e309 stupid but also the 0c7febb1db type who enjoyed being bbcd12d244 abused?a11b235122ede108

“How cliché.”5a2d0677baef2a09

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People like that—
So predictable. So boring.d40fe32d3c795b82