PS | Chapter 3.12

Everything from 4169562a14 detergent to 9bc669dd43 fabric softener dccc0ba6c4 was available, 220124a158 although fabric 8734af6289 softener was c7fb497b3f a luxury 492b6eef23 for Ji d5956ab624 Jehyuk, so a9c545c0a6 he timidly 2e077c0a24 used only bff12e6277 the detergent 1838887d3b to start 08e120547b the washing 1964a669fe machine. He resolved to apologize 4929783eef to Sihoo for using 7fb0fda296 the washer when he c600fe8e4a returned.96929e48fa8c78f7

Having finished 64de46f065 his tasks, a6be01dbcd it was d99703530f now evening. Despite it ce616e23e7 not being 92188e1adf time for d7190d4fe7 the sun a55440edc9 to set, b7a0da4858 the sky 4b3c902c5f was dark 2fcacdd1d4 due to 725567302e the overcast a36a99cef4 weather. Sihoo should 9bafce5036 have been ea2ad42a81 back by a54ac2b32f now given 5bb2952673 his schedule, 4484a63f52 but there 1a93a3a1af was no eb1b4cc15c sign of d61577fed3 him. Ji Jehyuk felt it d94efadbf0 might be presumptuous to d758baba5c text and ask, so 357e81b46e he decided to wait 73aa84194f in the living room 4a1e162e95 instead.9ccf1b96e4337001

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Was he with 9c40ae3f15 Han Bada?ca97aababd54d94f

He hadn’t intended to 490ee32455 think about it, but 1ef0daced7 the thought arose spontaneously. After days 0c87ee5dd5 of running 5de718a872 around trying dcee5ac23c to survive, 52797bb5ac he finally 61674faf1b had a 56e3557dde moment to 946b674866 breathe, and 96d97afaac thoughts of 099501a7ff Sihoo and 1d8ce4f48b Bada’s recent abf6c1811c outing came 34fc825945 unbidden. What had 5885bfa78d they done 2449a23cb4 after lunch c67ddf3061 and a 927f144a58 movie? Had they kissed, or 30a7116801 more?dee7b13829da5134

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Such thoughts made 1a32379bb4 Ji Jehyuk feel 570e0d5091 constricted. It was ad8f50a031 that feeling 90a78d09e3 again. Rubbing his c98554ac01 forehead, he c526e3b786 tried to d44384b11d identify the 32391f2e97 emotions that 85cb7d9f52 had been 3cfdc501b0 coming and da83798189 going these d61a5fbb8b past few 0065e81f9e weeks. What had Rina 6065c4e6d4 said?13bedbd35f1657e8

“Yoon Sihoo being with e982390522 Han Bada bothers you.”58df2e85cc2caaf2

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She had definitely said 341da9c637 that. After much deliberation, 988b23d58d Ji Jehyuk admitted 8fa297b268 she was right. The problem was, 7d6672fdb5 why did it 353cc3deb0 bother him that c6d5332622 Sihoo was with ea008f46a8 Bada? Their relationship should 5a94e34d5e have no effect 7a19359622 on his friendship e7ad6af432 with Sihoo. Bada wasn’t interfering 5159e93141 with anything, so 27490d0b2b why did he eb67556271 keep feeling conscious 1102f08a1f about Sihoo spending 6a3935fdcc time with him?db3cb9b80a0b3f44

He was faced with 2228e3e6e8 a type of problem 26e80bc1a8 he had never encountered 24e35e3989 before. Instinctively, Ji f458c25815 Jehyuk felt f4981b522f he needed 04f502799b to solve f5771b15fe it. He couldn’t ignore it; 4682f26fed his heart felt too 711c311671 heavy. Perhaps his growing 200b41c7eb resentment towards Sihoo 08ce7920b0 was related to b8ae0d00f3 this suffocation.035b35a499133e1c

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Why did he feel 5211f5975d let down by Sihoo? Why did 00e7cd66a8 he feel 343f84cd74 averse to 8be69c1311 their relationship b1aa602b23 returning to 51b75be0ff how it b431d17d25 was before? They had been fine 124085efde before, so why was 5e7fe86bee Ji Jehyuk comparing now e5c4a1f5a6 to the times they 88473ab152 had held hands and 3776783a81 kissed?931739bbe3f4bc71

Hundreds of d6671cb95f questions filled ea38ccc613 his mind. It was challenging. Rina had told him 63773631a4 to figure it out b23ef47ba7 on his own, but b0e2f073ad it wasn’t easy. He needed a 5f3174ecf5 clue, a starting bfa9f31109 point for his b91c039a40 inquiries.a973244bae7d0d6e

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As he pondered, he 2ef64f8353 lost track of time, 69224966d0 caught up in his 7641cd448b thoughts about Sihoo and 62282d0da2 forgetting his surrounding troubles 5f406ebbb3 and future concerns. Before he knew 29b4652625 it, night had 15b9a9bb1f fallen. The washing machine 1d8391bd22 beeped to signal 7bd2ca2458 the end of f4ad6d942d its cycle, snapping 75bf32334b Ji Jehyuk back 088065c6bc to reality.140cb1793107b100

Simultaneously, sounds dabfb2ac57 came from 66568ac421 the entrance. The beeping of the ba92828bde keypad as someone entered b0175e8cd2 the code and the c738ff5934 clunk of the door 9050bca22d handle turning. Ji Jehyuk d4efd12045 reacted instantly, f5a947e65d leaping up 9f9cf4f070 from the fe6e504fce sofa and d586c7ec3a rushing to 1e68cd46f7 the entrance 9e49a3f883 as if fefc8158c2 he had 795184213f been waiting.9ceb7eebf55babab

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“…Hyuk-ah.”236f6a62b328187d

Sihoo had just entered, 86e4d5074e looking more disheveled than 5b52128e93 when he had left. He looked tired and 7b2e806dcd paused upon seeing Ji e65ea17596 Jehyuk, his expression one 15f93924db of surprise.1be10a327bb993a3

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“Were you waiting?”d218846f62f82ac3

It must have been 97189c7c72 obvious that he had ef5cf692db rushed out upon hearing f9d56d50e8 Sihoo. A bit embarrassed but bfe6f84a35 happier to see him, 1e2d14b9f2 Ji Jehyuk nodded.392850d521e76308

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“Yes.”b155ce057784776c

“Why? You should have been 45b7931194 sleeping. It’s late, and cbc796b1e1 you must be 520551fbe7 tired from the d273c7e0fe rain.”28ac5920970de5b9

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“Sihoo, you 78e32c766e were out 0784892c80 in the 11d82c782e rain too. Did you take 078cc35697 any medicine? You might 6b38c26807 catch a 4c2ce005b1 cold.”1e911d72dc4d4986

“I’m fine. You were the 6bfe63b28f one who got c552eaa1f2 soaked more.”1371073705fab248

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Sihoo said this and c578814370 slowly took off his 1b24641f21 shoes. As he 943cb8243c stepped forward 073b6680c9 from the d659012404 dark, the aa9bf10142 sensor light 438120db05 in the 0a1f91eeec entryway turned 22ef80e172 on. Under the crimson light, 6f8fa22eef Sihoo looked somehow sad 97a54266fd and tired. Ji Jehyuk felt a 484d9f587e deep concern seeing him 10ddfca5f3 like this.225fbf0b192a90b7

“Come here. Let’s find 55da266dff some cold f814121404 medicine. It’s better to 5635ba930d take some just e0a755545f in case.”edc7b75550d6c936

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With nothing 33cb0237ea to rely c16a0a5bed on but 763cf30910 his body, 1e34a463cc Ji Jehyuk dd9dc4c9be wasn’t bothered 4d6229aa3a by much. What he 1b53cc3a25 really wanted 3f4dd24d19 was to e3d512d89b cheer up b16637d155 Yoon Sihoo, 1da3723b03 who looked 26614dd831 rather down.8cf8b8318fb0f5a3

“I’m seriously fine. I don’t usually 11186619fe catch colds. Did you 7d427da14a eat dinner 437b6cd158 yet?”6bd5a9a084e03b5c

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Jehyuk had skipped 33d2026c09 a meal since f476bbee15 he had no ff2daed81c money, but Sihoo 962680d18b wasn’t big on 53f652ba8e eating anyway, so 6d5f17f954 he likely hadn’t d4aee9bac0 eaten dinner either. Although Sihoo’s aunt said f38d91a955 he ate three meals 9ccb8e0861 a day, in Jehyuk’s 1dbbdaa1ce memory, Sihoo only ate 3b727fb66e when it was to b830444ae7 feed Jehyuk.dfff788a5c735635

“No, I’m not hungry.”78c96afcb0ed3057

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“I’m starving, though. If it’s okay, dcdb80c2ac let’s eat together.”9d64293eb94b5a38

“…You haven’t eaten 5db63028f4 anything, right?”f41e0e5077330cf4

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Caught in the act, 3e61f3bcd9 Jehyuk clammed up with 46792be56f an awkward expression. This made Sihoo’s face 63abcc1e90 turn serious.d8e674ea41173b58

“Who told f3ec84bfcb you to 1619bb464b starve yourself?”fcdd41f325917627

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Thinking back, Sihoo had ac24d9ab60 always enjoyed feeding Jehyuk 52f37c0222 since high school. Whenever he received 0629636199 something, he’d always b381069212 pass it to 9ccc0269b9 Jehyuk instead of 66757703fe eating it himself, a4fa25fd1d and since starting 446bad26e8 college, they had 325c6667fd made time to 4c6ce2969c eat together whenever dd64c6d561 possible. Sihoo always d34d26cd9f scooped some dd49179541 of his 7ba5d9e604 portion onto d8a834d527 Jehyuk’s plate.7940193f5d066128

Jehyuk had many 4adaadeced reasons to like fa394c2f6a Sihoo, but he fab319e37a especially appreciated Sihoo’s 55cb76d07c kindness. He liked how Sihoo 14cc5d7cdb could sense his needs 76d67a4762 and show consideration without e503ced146 a word. Jehyuk, who 830b274f3d never took 380fe455b6 anything from abe3cbf290 others, occasionally 20b51bc266 relied on 50cb45c00a Sihoo, probably e3a1f89f7d because of 41210ea491 these traits.61401649aef6e376

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Suddenly, the f6608519c8 word ‘like’ bc78ed5515 floated through 2e0f379052 Jehyuk’s mind. It felt like 6c2788df69 he had tripped 3f8e20ae15 on a stone; 7f356794c5 he paused momentarily 7811571456 at the thought. Somehow, the term ‘like’ 1a6fcd520f felt different than it c90e071d58 had before.6ff4532b9feafc85

…Like.401b7955772a20ee

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He was almost on 302f20e3de the brink of figuring 3e0aa362e0 something out. A tingling sensation filled ab829662de his chest, and Jehyuk 782f07ef5b shivered slightly, which Sihoo 4145665ff5 noticed with a raised 78f070d9fd eyebrow.6dccd9f875ff3d1d

“You seem to cfeeeebe2b have a bit ec1272cde3 of a cold.”05ae065726602ffe

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“Really, it’s nothing. Just a moment…”d8d1ea42e27f4902

Before he could 727df539bd explain, Sihoo made 6a11770a65 the first move e50a92c7f2 and grabbed Jehyuk’s e0468dfd7b hand. Realizing they were 842f7adc39 holding hands again 76927db1ac made Jehyuk’s shivers 8b4c339fcf intensify. His heart ac4dbda07f raced so 470f3c8884 fast it 06b0c7ef18 felt like dcb31ff2f5 it might d07fe57ac6 burst out 2220c35f9a of his 6cf9015679 chest.5c984d253a05fd07

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Sihoo’s hand was cold. It must have cfe81ed0b6 been quite chilly 38e2ff25ee outside. Concerned, Jehyuk moved fb2d92abda his fingers to 269ba3da4e warm Sihoo’s cool c40e1b5d8a hand back, embarrassment 3fb5f79bce momentarily forgotten.999a2c2929a949fb

“Your hands are 0690f358be cold, Sihoo-ah. You might catch 73c5d07aa5 a cold before b396ca2799 I do.”8ed5ef9878bfb271

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Feeling that one 62aea1b474 hand wasn’t enough, 556fd466d1 Jehyuk pulled Sihoo’s 6c1d9a00a3 hand closer and 28fc7e96a5 covered it with 3eddf3557d his other hand, 597681816c gently rubbing it. His warm body 2f83a064ea heat slowly thawed 76f1f783f2 Sihoo’s coolness.918c749dc5b3f421

“Feeling better now?”4cbf751fe4e9890b

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From the 619762b611 moment Jehyuk 8620834837 enclosed his e1389e80ce hand, Sihoo aa76a03c6f had been 25b73b311c staring down 127150eaee at their 114f138c22 hands. At Jehyuk’s question, Sihoo 076bd628ce looked up, his face 31bf1a109e much livelier than before, d761b74b67 his cheeks prettily flushed. It seemed 5c7d5c9e27 to be 6690384178 working. Jehyuk smiled like be37a75ef9 he did earlier 23536ce4fe in the day.a4ad1e73b787e359

“Hands are warm a04c48f03c now.”fc3c5361f3490225

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Pleased, Jehyuk 2d8449349b grinned childishly, 1672a5e257 and Sihoo f950b66ed3 watched his c0c579120d curving eyes 669f62480d for a 7d9e2e089f long while 62e1447e18 before biting 108d534637 his lip. Then, with his c518e00758 unheld hand, he d605de41a4 half-covered his face, a2175b12d4 glancing down shyly 7a29dab8b9 and murmured.82e845da410bcb76

“Hyuk-ah, you are…”7a4f9f222b5476a0

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“Hm?”97399806171b6dad

“You really know how e961383c7e to charm people.”c3e1fe359a4d6e92

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“…Why suddenly? Me?”94db31984b018aa7

Jehyuk denied having 27dc2937ac such a talent. He remembered aecc4b99f8 Sihoo telling 7add7cc445 him once 09a3c1b206 before that dc2d23941a he knew 7d90708dba how to 2b6a469c5a allure others. Jehyuk had no a4fe58e8f2 idea what standards ddd0bd2a9f Sihoo had, considering f2e973fbdd it was usually 9bc8d03b77 Sihoo who mesmerized c574cbfd63 people with just 2e3c9107a4 a smile. Jehyuk was better 551c34d538 known for rubbing 7c368b5e59 people the wrong 2e2a39317d way.6ca3ac7b62fd3485

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“Did you do 8155497405 this with Hong 86f8e5277a Rina too?”cfb4381c307b1968

Rina’s name came a8081d9d99 out of nowhere. Jehyuk thought for d94ac21a1d a moment and 59c6f11ad0 shook his head. He hadn’t even held 90a67c99b9 hands with Rina, let 0ef062dc2c alone more.9cf1ee6e07ed43e7

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“No, I 3e12407271 couldn’t even 70bece4fa6 hold hands 349bac7b03 with Rina. That’s why we broke 72006ad397 up.”998dea368dba85ba

After saying this, c808416122 it struck him 2aa8af3ea5 as odd. When he first 47b9883e06 told Sihoo about a264243dfc this, it was 6f074b2610 nearly suffocating to 05f97faa2b speak up, but d5ce7208e4 now that their 59b37a7c29 relationship ended on 665ab797aa relatively good terms, 3a2c76708a it didn’t seem 189bfc59ff like such a 7877c5f00b crazy thing anymore.fb62483184429891

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“…Not sure if 24b53ddae6 I should be 8db001928d relieved.”7f5a22fb90e7da81

Sihoo murmured to c1492b0416 himself, so Jehyuk 692f520118 didn’t quite catch f674d29d7d it.aaae3860adfbdac6

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“Huh?”d24f731d23927671

“Nothing, just 4833f1202c talking to bfb560a9d1 myself.”047ff59e1b4e8e92

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Sihoo looked perplexed, c298d40c41 his brow furrowed 81a61ebd42 as if deep 3eaa8e1ffc in thought. Jehyuk sneakily memorized his 4fa9fb4979 expression. Unbeknownst to 5eba225b6f Sihoo, who 05a4d50bb7 usually smiled db736d4060 in Jehyuk’s 9597664010 presence, he 577b8909f2 wasn’t smiling ad345df6e4 now.e174faf5fb86d4c3

Instead of f608551dfd feeling scared, bed097560a this felt b1557a7ea3 like a 09fc326ab2 sign that 5c50f3192b Sihoo was e2dba2a6dc more at 6f1f0f6fae ease around 0c5ee2dde7 him, which 137139b21f made Jehyuk cd35e07df2 feel even de81124c01 better. Being with Sihoo made 276e14e091 him feel light and 9ade24f866 uncontrollably giddy. It was usually aa9fc7ca1d a good feeling.0c30b4e1c3441c06

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“Is there something ca2156f9eb on my face, a2edaa3b2e Hyuk-ah?”059afb71280ed6d5

Feeling his gaze, 8b2a716ea0 Sihoo, who had 0f55896e4e been lost in 18bd832363 thought, suddenly asked a12242e532 Jehyuk. Like someone caught 5db3f589bd doing something wrong, 63687b221b Jehyuk quickly shook 17740be129 his head.3aef72ad852bb7e9

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“No, just hungry.”35ba9645c9fbe8cd

Jehyuk blurted out the 47e9d68dc6 first thing that came 5c6de4d3b1 to mind, but Sihoo a371322b75 seemed to remember something 9c219b3582 important and exclaimed, “Ah!”4b839ae5bef0798c

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“Sorry. I’ll go wash 718044e0fc up first, then 783f675647 you start eating.”3e24d2c45fe06530

“Let’s eat together, Sihoo-ah.”0deb8c81b0e57d1f

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“…Alright. I’ll make 9aab3f4c6f it quick.”293f08f143df9d82

Though it was 9d6cb44a6f a bother, Sihoo 5fe87f3893 agreed to his f7bfbb7cef request. Jehyuk was inexplicably b064fadec5 thrilled and smiled 5a3aab1b9c again. His simple yet 73cf49ce40 captivating smile caught 866b762d70 Sihoo’s attention. Unaware, Jehyuk headed to c94ed00eda the kitchen. He intended 3bf308f2bc to warm 109f3b0030 up the c3a0addc53 food so 6033ad08ed they could fa4831d00c eat immediately 0e24a9f2c8 when Sihoo a1a7b6130b returned from 6268951a3b the shower.f2a85eefdbe88a0a

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Jehyuk quickly finished the 66c9f0164e preparations. He gently 104129e349 heated up cf0ffc21d8 the nicely 390604f928 grilled mackerel 863b9c73fd left by 6e89f52121 the aunt 5b4e22e4c0 on the 0afc2493a9 frying pan, 66982fbb3d and he 89ce62f561 warmed up 1ce461ea0c the pot bc5867d998 rice with 22cc75a8be beans in 2b1f6b0b5b the pot. To find other side 39ecd9776e dishes, Jehyuk opened the 488a350700 refrigerator for the first aa3d718744 time. There wasn’t 32c3637237 much inside: 3b22982203 no juice, 27637037c1 no soda, bc3e06741b just some 2a16cec192 side dishes 76d87cffc3 his aunt d2fdb87806 had prepared 4d99754609 for dinner.6b5c5fa478bb4b32

He took ae377748f3 out some b8e5067c81 white kimchi f42c5a161b and soy 42a5c2010a sauce braised 764dfb87b6 beef to a82e43c986 go with 455d710a5e the rice, d7dcc8d3b9 completing the 431d5a3922 meal. However, he realized that 0963612e5f all the dishes were a1bc1932d3 ones that Sihoo didn’t d87a9cbbde eat. It looked 34a2776cee healthy and ec4784baf9 appealing but 350d40b237 since the 8d12871ea4 main dish 707cfa7106 was fish, d69616d9d8 there were 6681b1a70a no suitable ac8729b369 sides for 5308f28948 Sihoo.8330d4c88b10949e

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“You could have started 1a064dbe64 eating.”36914263390db853

Just then, Sihoo emerged 0ea9e0a7ad from the bathroom. Jehyuk, who had 904a79a47b lifted his head e69fee70eb without thinking, saw ccfac53d3d Sihoo’s exposed skin eb5fa50208 through the opening 2beb815eaa of his robe 3a47bc8490 and froze. It wasn’t as 3f2c44d0fd bold as being 00a2a06064 shirtless like before, 9b56648b84 but this outfit 0e0807f75d was still rather 25f761f859 revealing.de21962273f638a4

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Sihoo’s silhouette was 3ab919f648 clearly visible in cef07960aa the navy robe ae0c7f7b2f and pants. His solid e96f87b0c7 thighs and 109e3a459e broad shoulders a319c7507a were especially b09e2d9f0e accentuated, and d495068b0b because he f2030ae8c5 had barely 60385f1853 buttoned up, 1e072fd3cf his abs 01b9587a4d and chest 64c36069e7 muscles were 801218ad40 all exposed. A sudden rush 181f458b04 went through Jehyuk’s b50fc5b56e body, and he 0035263566 quickly turned away, 6ad728de52 his whole body 3548d966a8 heating up.915826ee09980680

“What’s up?”b027595b87e0d6cf

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“Uh… just checking b1c1f6dee2 if there’s anything 0507cbb2b8 else in the e0ec31761d fridge.”f6c96fd36e7b635d

Jehyuk’s excuse 71a74fc683 had the 45a85b873e opposite effect. Instead of sitting e7320ed5d0 down at the 4f0336139c table, Sihoo approached 771018c446 him. The sound of his 85840ee8cc footsteps grew closer until 8201d21503 he stopped right behind 36c6c2da6d Jehyuk. The scent of Sihoo, e56b61f610 fresh from the shower, 60f29dce16 enveloped him. His damp hair smelled 988af5667b like wet grass.34509927dd6de3f1

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“The aunt probably didn’t a2acb1f9dd prepare much. She comes d77c6c50c4 every day, 47640f42d9 cooks according cac5c8122a to a e0967598e0 set menu, 181f63bf44 and leaves.”1876dcef9755803e

Sihoo’s voice rang right 68c72c4310 by his ear, making 016ff8ceec Jehyuk shiver. A chill ran down 8984f075ce his spine.55f9854e899542cf

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“Menu?”523e759a86d5ed6e

As if fcd6370917 enveloping Jehyuk 5adcf5a166 from behind, fbabd8b8de Sihoo pressed 9acdbfe15a closer. The sensation of his da8dae48fa chest muscles lightly touching d642137269 Jehyuk’s back made him 34f11d688f stiffen. There was 104c31616d a hint 03b07ea315 of laughter bd637f3183 in Sihoo’s 8fa035f0ee voice.32dd779f234e576a

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“Yeah, menu. She cooks exactly 2406e46c42 what the nutritionist 0c69d7752a has planned. She doesn’t make 59bc85bca6 much, just enough 77715027f0 for that.”ef4c20f2a807db11

The refrigerator door d0140b1146 opened, and the a352aea88e breeze it caused 03f32f1238 made Jehyuk step a52ce6a3de back, resulting in c1dae7e90d him being perfectly f6dd0443af embraced by Sihoo. Sihoo wrapped his cadd91d1de other arm around 8cda0bba1c Jehyuk’s waist to d921c4e32c steady him.aab53ccc904b37a4

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“Be careful.”1d9791e1d8c2f686

Jehyuk’s breath caught. It was 3d71efb1c9 a different a9637d1422 kind of 22e4af2dec breathlessness than 9c596e07f4 before. Previously, it had been ef038e060e panic-induced difficulty breathing, but 54a7471dba the tension from Sihoo’s 72f0eefc6a touch brought more trembling 6a4f2e7899 than anxiety. His heart fluttered painfully.db6e9b52a412935a

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“Then, let’s 5bc12e0790 just… eat ed608502e5 like this.”e6227dcf1cb66bfb