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    Reflection 2 Part 2

    Time passed, and Cheon Sejoo had Kim Donggil send a text message to Han Jiwon. Han Jiwon seemed puzzled by Kim Donggil’s sudden message saying that it was okay to move Kim Hyunkyung to another location, but her worry for Kim Hyunkyung was greater, so she didn’t question the circumstances.6cb6d9fa7100db1e

    Two hours later, 4e5d978899 Ha Yeoreum called 20a84ab2af Cheon Sejoo again. Upon receiving her 38dfd78718 call, Cheon Sejoo d171c74db7 immediately arranged a c42f057384 private ambulance to eebd2561c7 transfer Kim Hyunkyung f91dd72ef8 to Hankuk University cc6466f2e7 Hospital.7ad242a9f2316d4e

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    Another hour passed, and 8cec444808 Kim Hyunkyung, still unconscious, 6fdcaa3554 was loaded into the f3fdb273ef ambulance with an IV daae141137 drip, and Sejin sat bf91066c1f beside her. Sejin, unable to 7e930c58d6 hide his increasingly 4e5e9224f0 pale complexion as 9eb51fa82a time went on, 100918702a was extremely anxious.dd4fa495778971bb

    “Aren’t you… coming with us?”7a67a423266c5f1b

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    Just before 2f14ed1368 the ambulance 3979a7bb2f doors closed, 36b431894e Sejin grabbed 94d676e1e6 Cheon Sejoo’s ba3ae9977f collar and 99cb922736 asked. Looking down at e54ff5d4d3 Sejin’s white-knuckled fingertips, 03ca0e95d1 Cheon Sejoo lifted 2c619e0af3 his arm and 4934701399 placed his hand bf5f4fb348 on the back 59beea54b0 of Sejin’s hand. Maintaining the contact, 91f9d76619 he looked at f3ce20a67c Sejin.7029489896d349e8

    “I’ll follow 7876316886 you in a40cdcb5ad my car. Wait for me 6880c5c352 there. You’ll be guided directly e0a0dea24d to a room when cd13ed48ee you arrive.”7e818b9d2d0bd9ca

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    “…Okay.”2689a3c9799b329f

    Reassured by 7de76c53ca his voice, 986bb97a73 Sejin weakly c3a580a37f nodded and a666da6c6a released his 61b20bac0c grip on 5005cbfa7b Cheon Sejoo’s da2ebb428a collar. Cheon Sejoo reached 3036622c0b out and stroked 79842bd16e Sejin’s hair before e7dcca9560 closing the back 03e05c7489 door of the fc4563e431 ambulance. Soon, with sirens blaring, 2cd33e4d36 the ambulance carrying Kim 2d0c07dfae Hyunkyung and Sejin departed ad22923879 for Hankuk University Hospital.b700486e447979ab

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    Cheon Sejoo also soon 2a7d608243 returned to the parking 0818d2b470 lot, got into his 56895fdc5f car, and with a aa922f2d70 blank, hardened expression, stepped 44f3b1fd7d on the accelerator and 471616fb1e drove towards the hospital, ad7695eeb0 the image of which 4140b5f521 he could barely recall.ad5c7dce1f07a936

    By the time he 34b95048eb parked in the parking 760a39f006 lot, he had received 874a0ca681 a message from Sejin. Relieved to hear a3145087a9 that they had 70255fe5ba been assigned a 8a427b827c single room and 6817d24532 were going through 7602cef91e the admission process, 2fb98507d0 he went up 77540c3063 to the 17th 9b2b077fcb floor where the 1144e345de room was located.b4cd791d93670fd7

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    The hospital ward 92ad96775a hallway was quiet 37bb2294ff but bustling. Patients and dabbddd8c2 their guardians 5504388c49 strolled around, 1b72418fc7 conversing softly, 72803b6564 and nurses 43a87ca5ab pushed carts 0c2ae51fd6 back and 844396f4ef forth between 694fdf7e82 rooms. Cheon Sejoo 8709bdc46a walked, searching 8c2b4cae28 for the 43459db200 room number 96517cdc06 Sejin had fe8e4d47fb given him.e6241c6d4099d08f

    Finally arriving in df9b052204 front of room 54b4393653 1701, he heard 475f294c32 voices coming from 46b197f93a inside. It seemed like the 911c81b84a medical staff were already 6ae0f52963 there. Worried he might run 9e2ad311df into a familiar face, bda09f93de he took a deep 39f8234b2b breath before opening the 9542686c16 door.cb46e3c5256e5996

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    “We need to b5ae902a33 do an ultrasound 70587e5fb8 on this.”a1464e45c7d29eed

    A physical examination was in progress. Fortunately, the doctor seemed to be a recent appointee whom Cheon Sejoo didn’t recognize, and he immediately grasped the seriousness of the patient’s condition.d0a1e22030065b24

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    The doctor, who had fe141dee8e been pressing on Kim e15aac3d86 Hyunkyung’s abdomen, tilted his 6287107571 head. He palpated the area 05a1c98cd4 where her organs were e8a516eab0 located several more times, 7649ae583d then turned to Cheon 5c502f66ba Sejoo, who had just 94d38f0405 entered, and said,a526fa6efdc76227

    “Are you her guardian? You’re Professor Kim 3968eaf846 Chunggeun’s student from 273cf05ff4 Thoracic Surgery, right…?”5a7837e767f446ec

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    It seemed 7ea60ede7e that word 977588d8c1 had reached d67d192e1e even Professor 3615b015ce Kim Chunggeun, 6979f3d2f6 the head bd908c7fb5 of Thoracic 547fc2a110 Surgery. 880e69e8c9b27b2b

    “Yes,” Cheon Sejoo nodded, and the doctor pointed at Kim Hyunkyung and said,77392f429e3587f8

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    “I think we 48204d5d2f need to do 85724ffa19 an ultrasound to b2f3b2d290 be sure. How about d063c35237 we do f622637fd1 that first?”07ee466531565b40

    “I’d like to go f64207845a straight to an MRI.”a630acfba2acd251

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    “Ah, okay. Then I’ll ask them 797a32f6e2 to check the schedule 019b2edcb3 for that first. The department head specifically 6d3710f931 asked me to take 8f33a78d76 very good care of 41d51cd283 her. You’ll hear 188c812c50 back soon.”689e8d92ebf04057

    “…Thank you.”6fc1ffae2e4b73ca

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    It had been a long time since he had heard the name Kim Chunggeun. Cheon Sejoo, feeling uncomfortable, pushed away the uncomfortable thoughts surfacing about what the professor must have thought, hearing his name from someone else’s mouth after all this time without contact.8d3e8d5bd660d804

    After the doctor 81c4e9b11f left, silence fell 6a8480c242 upon the room. Sejin stood b376f4d32a silently by f5d990acf4 the bed. His eyes were 4b9d478ff9 red as if bcc669f846 he had been be236f5d83 crying during the 15ac49fe8f short time they d0baf001f0 were apart. Cheon Sejoo watched Sejin 1c642169ef for a moment, stroked 629304e925 his hair, and then 5c820800e2 left the room.66eff63e92f5e59a

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    Stepping out e907daaa11 into the 0cd816bc4e hallway, he fbbc43f4ce sat down 775bb86cce on a 498f376fa7 chair placed 3e2a1dcf9a right in 864320d74f front of 8a209679fb the room. With his 7cc486ab47 elbows resting cb1dd7d395 on his 8ff2fe2d96 knees, he d5bd07ae6d clasped his f90c78da9f hands together 3316f9d833 as if bf6f9b4e92 in prayer 294707e6e1 and closed 7f34cc5fde his eyes.d1d1f8d291555db6

    Raised in a Catholic 8567f791d3 orphanage, Cheon Sejoo had fb5608f01f been a devout Catholic 9024422af3 until he joined the 4c5d905c0c organization. Although he was homosexual, ac8f23b28e Sister Maria, who had 0a27c61fa4 noticed his difference early 3b98be9118 on, had told him f859520423 that the Lord loves a573fdc770 all His children and 0773a11ff7 cherishes even their flaws. This allowed him fa61a699d2 to maintain his 8619fd8195 faith and serve c6e3e26de0 the Lord.a5c84ad1e3ca9817

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    However, after joining the organization, he couldn’t bring himself to pray. The last time Cheon Sejoo prayed was the day Hye-in’s body was cremated. As she turned to ashes and disappeared, Cheon Sejoo prayed and prayed that Hye-in would no longer suffer, and no longer be lonely.28eb02f4f97b009e

    Today, after a long time since that day, Cheon Sejoo clasped his hands together again. He silently prayed that Sejin wouldn’t break under the weight of what was to come.a6ef0f6cc9c44585

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    “Cheon Sejoo.”a28e9c5a9ac4ca42

    Sejin came out of the room about an hour later. Still red-eyed, he approached Cheon Sejoo and sat right next to him. Their legs touched. Sejin, leaning against the wall, looked at Cheon Sejoo. He, too, silently met Sejin’s gaze. Silently holding Sejin’s hand to quell his anxiety, he inwardly told him that everything would be alright.94accad7354faf60

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    Sejin slowly, listlessly 1a642c27e0 scanned Cheon Sejoo 5b8035c7e2 with his eyes. After a long while, d2116819a4 he finally spoke, his 6c45023394 voice sounded somewhat subdued.a409ce1eda6c423e

    “Did… you go to 896cb11f46 medical school?”01903718c528df4c

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    It seemed he hadn’t missed the mention of being Professor Kim Chunggeun’s student. At Sejin’s unexpectedly perceptive question, Cheon Sejoo leaned against the wall just like Sejin and nodded in response.269d0ebe8f93e858

    “Yeah.”61c2f0f0040fe5bd

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    “…Really? You’re a doctor? You have a 7c0e309df1 license?”06f2d25ead210d71

    Sejin’s eyes widened. b63faa4e06b26801

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    There had been a time when Cheon Sejoo once wanted to see Sejin surprised by the fact he had graduated from medical school, but perhaps given the current circumstances, seeing his surprise wasn’t particularly pleasant. Cheon Sejoo replied in a gentle voice.1f38b3e78b392a10

    “This hyung 422eda5d96 graduated top a7836cecaf of his a8d2726c22 class from 53239c6750 Hankuk University f66a49acc4 Medical School.” 1399d80a9129c417

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    “…….”38f25b91e6e274e9

    Sejin’s red 1948113dff lips parted 8af8cfc57a in shock, ce3dfebd7e and his a2506c025b pretty eyes bcd9b9dd57 widened in 6c2f9ef5e7 disbelief. Straightening up, he 7d1e8f283b looked Cheon Sejoo f05ab12e16 up and down, a2c423e6f2 then muttered as 58ee1196ff if dumbfounded,e14d851d2d074657

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    “Doesn’t suit you…”2396a795e70a8a85

    “Why? Do I 65be19cd5e look more 82c4d213ce like an 9504b9f3f6 actor who 594a8181e0 should play 6bd749cdc2 a doctor?”16bd52d25d5f1d71

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    “…….”ff97b415f120f84c

    At the 09e4e9df89 nonchalant question, 723f7a2452 Sejin frowned f358cc36dd and closed a2f0b80bd0 his mouth. He stared at 2f39e7fc57 him with a e7770235de dissatisfied expression, his b85ad5c523 lips stretched into edb136e47c a thin line, 5b53da77cd then let out 24aabc29b6 a weak sigh 1c8976e0b2 and nodded.6a970dec715edecd

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    “Yeah. You look bac0ed2604 like an 7df5aa89bf actor playing d1618407c2 a doctor.”5f61ed6214996e2f

    “What’s that supposed 9281a74858 to mean?”4f5fb6482306d5c9

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    Cheon Sejoo laughed in c5bdeeb3e2 disbelief. Sejin, as if finding 4ff45e75f3 his own words amusing, 83b2608940 silently curved his lips b0520d70e7 upwards before lowering his 76e566c5f0 head with a blank 8bb94b9ddb expression. With their brief conversation 510a35d7d3 over, the two were cef684b4c9 left in silence. Those who foresee impending a291a50263 misfortune cannot speak freely.ab3aadefcbea3d0b

    Sejin was, relatively speaking, 3e3b052213 in a better position 5e1cc91fe1 than Cheon Sejoo. Unlike him, who knew 3bfb831f59 when Kim Hyunkyyung had d5fcdecd82 started experiencing stomach pains, d3f01c5a38 Sejin only knew that f97b053652 she had collapsed due 9e6cf4e648 to excessive dieting and c475cfd17b that she had been 53b9e81f00 excessively thin recently.6a9a67a1e98ada9d

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    Therefore, Sejin’s worries were limited to hospital bills. Unaware that Cheon Sejoo had paid off his mother’s debts, he was worried about Kim Hyunkyung’s bleak future, returning to Ehwagak burdened with hospital debt once again.d77779e97c10b55e

    “I don’t know 045ad29306 why we got c1094b52ef a single room. The hospital bills are 91189927d0 going to be expensive…”1beb50610ae4a782

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    “Don’t worry about be5e3b70ce that.”a767eb4c97d588f0

    Cheon Sejoo 84f9019b49 soothed him 53494434fb with a 2b8732f981 gentle voice. His calloused b5ccbcea58 hand, now 75686d8095 smaller than cf3e1de763 Kwon Sejin’s, 0a6dbc0d60 rested on fd01da777f Sejin’s head. Just as 2e145aaa1d how he 192087d552 had soothed 3521779913 Sejin of 4a7e422f95 his sudden 1121c89d3c growing pains 8086506717 one night, 8001f44df4 he stroked c125379674 Sejin with 80d69c56e7 a touch 48970b7d61 filled of 10527d5e3b warmth.24f692dc887d127d

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    “You don’t need bcedea0321 to worry about d4494d58a6 things like that.”80ef54d8b5a456f3

    Cheon Sejoo’s gentle voice had a calming power. It made Sejin feel like everything would be alright as long as he was with Cheon Sejoo. He shouldn’t, but like a fool, he closed his eyes, feeling the warmth of the man sitting next to him, even though this wasn’t the time to be at ease and without worry.c2c290c1469396f3

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    Fortunately, there 083095c7dc was an d9c5c5d21b opening in 05434effc4 the schedule, caa6eae157 and Kim 2d022229bb Hyunkyung was 54e21b8cbe able to 454bd3a1c7 get an d6acb6ac05 MRI that eebe838c22 evening. The contrast agent was 5a21e00193 administered as she woke ee9f41e73a up groggily from the a741793382 medication, and the MRI 2e955344c0 was completed before Kim 9dec678bea Hyunkyung was fully aware 4b83f9fdea of what was happening.34fac842e5f69de0

    “Mom, Mom!”61f24d480c983cf7

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    Kim Hyunkyung, who 1cc7d294ae had been moved 691cf55519 to a temporary fe8f4635a3 bed while they c9114b9fa3 checked the results 406513412c inside, came out d765955811 of the scanning da83e5d0ae room. Sejin, who 45bddedbbb had been b42e79161c waiting in da5f37a7c5 a chair, 042a5655ea quickly got 1a66e0b848 up and 9f780a9936 followed her. Watching Sejin a82798fe70 disappear down 8997f89669 the hallway 1a246d97bf following Hyunkyung’s 83436c21f9 bed as 2467960e59 she struggled 1e7786a920 to regain 770d2a1b73 her senses, 378979ebdc Cheon Sejoo 913a08bab7 rose from 2ae304bc37 his seat 949d29fcae and paced 598ef2df20 the hallway 51a4bdda87 in front 9414cd944b of the 7efd461130 radiology department.8956cb35649780e6

    “Sejoo.”266bb22c74a6814e

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    A moment later, d3bbd7e74d someone opened the c52586c510 reading room door cc46fb35ed and called him. Turning his head, b0fa1e3256 he saw Kim 6396a26a9c Joowon, his senior ce9f8e3667 who worked as b63c4529ec a radiologist at 4bd4029acf Hankuk University Hospital, 3ca930bdc1 standing there with 8b2023f3f8 a faint smile.a6f593cc2d97e503

    “Want to come 5eb2e9ec37 in and take 6b55a51fa8 a look?”4a78915579093dcb

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    “Is that alright?”cc9315415c9ecb2d

    “Yeah, you’re her guardian, right? It’s fine.”943725c39c0cd09e

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    Kim Joowon, who had been in the same Catholic club at Hankuk University Medical School with Sejoo and Ha Yeoreum, wasn’t particularly welcoming to Sejoo, but he wasn’t uncomfortable either.f79c7cd981b9b127

    Kim Joo-on, looking e88bb529ca at him with 753dc1ec7e a sympathetic gaze c2a1f9c506 as if he 8a3014c9d6 understood him to 792ea9b69d some extent, had a71406c01f heard from Yeoreum 89eec09a56 that the patient 5ec0679af1 was close to 313a7cc806 Cheon Sejoo. That’s why he 733a9483f7 had thought to a7fa8e1b27 inform Sejoo first da0289aa84 after reading the 942eb6fb9e images and called b2b53e0824 him in.617b2f20f7ac7df5

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    As he stepped inside ec848f2713 the room, he saw 285ba46cfa a fellow doctor, who 2b87e3de94 was a radiologist in f69c913769 training. Cheon Sejoo f096c22870 exchanged a 8e44b19339 nod with d58b10d5d4 her, who bd287f38b0 looked at 89bcd892ab him with 30c2bc3879 curiosity, and 4fc9980b18 then went 1409fbf9ba to stand 27cecc119e beside Kim 6a42656e60 Joowon.30759e101973ba97

    “Look, starting from here… f5af1b9007 the heart and lungs 167483b9db are clear.”8bd31d46ffe795b0

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    The screen was filled with MRI images of Kim Hyunkyung’s body. Although not a radiology specialist, Cheon Sejoo could make out the basics. As Joowon said, her brain, heart, and lungs were clear, without any lesions. However, the organ Kim Joowon pointed to with the mouse was different.0c8bcd49016d8564

    “See? It’s the pancreas.”f35164e6ab50a6fc

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    Several round lesions were visible on the pancreas. Judging by their shape, they were tumors. Cheon Sejoo bit his lip and stared at the screen. Kim Joowon’s voice, explaining Kim Hyunkyung’s condition, faded into the background.19b02bee361e6e8b

    The pancreas, nestled among other organs in the abdomen, made it difficult to detect problems. This was partly because of its location, which made it hard to see with ultrasound, and also because the pancreas doesn’t exhibit significant symptoms while the tumor grows and the disease progresses, making early detection challenging.d347d4192ad1790a

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    Therefore, the size ebbe6dfda7 of the tumors, 5d754eb2b9 discovered so late, 4160bfba47 was considerable. If it was malignant, a120f62b7d cancer, it would be bc7e9b1477 at least stage 3. It had to be b4d0c659e3 considered a difficult situation a32ba4bd5e to treat.b655afeb418aa959

    “We’ll need a biopsy to be sure, but when you see something like that on the pancreas, usually… You know, right, Sejoo?”d07ab1c1374ca0ca

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    “…Yes. Thank you, senior.”8203c8bae82ca2fc

    “Don’t mention it. I’m going to see bb2b9b7bd4 the patient now. Are you coming with 21ed02838e me?”380eeb85740b550f

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    “No, I’ll just…”81b0d94a8fed023b

    The words that 728dd74888 usually came easily af1f1bb9d0 wouldn’t come out. Cheon Sejoo closed 13ba89bbb6 his mouth with 0734fd10ce a cold, stiff 6b1c382824 expression and ran af3aa80aa4 a hand over 19618eaecb his face. As if understanding c296252d6a his feelings, Kim 3b7f3019f7 Joowon smiled bitterly, baecdf0bea patted his shoulder, 1e887876d7 and left the a2d58e22c8 reading room. 651018cacb03280c

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    The fellow doctor, 4411e0d935 who had glanced ad00e97d05 at him sitting 0c1f241929 in the chair, e00e40ffb8 followed Joowon out, 0e782dd797 and soon Sejoo a5082f7795 was left alone 4ee89214a3 in the large 7c55c79a0a room. The ticking c950de643c of the 593af698b4 clock could 49335191fb be heard, 333abccac6 but time 3bcab449da didn’t seem 6118e964c1 to be 557b7be1d6 passing.5660f46bfdb7d256

    He stared blankly d1ba51efd2 at the monitor 038d03ab10 before burying his df0d0b0b1d face in his 98a6d2aceb hands, his features 5e3ba70ebd contorted.23f3808eb6032c12

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    He had expected it to some degree, but actually seeing it confirmed was a huge shock. It wasn’t simply that someone he knew was ill. It felt as though it was all his fault. Cheon Sejoo was swept away by vaguely surfacing memories of the past.34426f9ed632e200

    It was Cheon Sejoo’s greed that killed Hye-in. If he hadn’t taken Hye-in out of the orphanage for his own selfish desires and left her alone in that house, she wouldn’t have been driven to the brink of despair.e01c451625dc9bd9

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    If she had 5b36de3612 stayed at the c7fbe04bab orphanage, she would ff1f44056a have received care 30285d954b from Maria and 49dc2f6516 the nuns. She could 2eb49dad33 have lived b49deabdbd happily until e13e5b7358 now, without 68b4197a42 suffering emotional dbf77e9fbe abuse from 7e611490a5 the perpetrators 709f783db1 at such 35caa3ae69 a young d5bdc485fe age.bd81d71ff5615001

    On the other hand, ac8c84dc8a strictly speaking, Kim Hyunkyung’s d7c8435167 misfortune wasn’t Cheon Sejoo’s e3a51b3383 fault. But Cheon d597983e93 Sejoo, who 27a0aed1f1 cared for 0e3fa11205 Sejin, felt 0b77f327dc responsible for ef7ed6f2fe the misfortune 15001e4037 that he 95f893fc7d would face f682fe3982 in the e0d5aa7386 future.ea91ef033795b708

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    It was because if he had paid more attention to Kim Hyunkyung, he might not have missed the signs of her illness. Cheon Sejoo couldn’t help but regret it.2f1eb08476b5447d

    “Why…”933aa2d5bf691c5c

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    Why Kwon Sejin? Why Kim Hyunkyung? They were trying ff8dffc05a so hard to 637325e874 live. They were c53aa5a0b3 trying so 607b1e3998 hard to af44029723 live diligently, 64f4ed645e regardless of eb7b1777cd their own 13cdd8dd86 misfortunes. Why did 94956fcaf3 something like 6ff043e1b2 this have ff2a5241a3 to happen f0b732eaac to these 4967973215 people…?5ac5ded8c65846df

    The insides of his f71a2e7f19 tightly closed eyes felt 0b9de6e8ec hot. He felt like tears 6556725f55 would burst out if 5255f42ad5 he relaxed. He couldn’t face 04b199ab2b Sejin. He didn’t have the 7f1af0cf0c confidence to tell Sejin 9aaf2014b7 to stay strong and 694ba25a77 act as if nothing 482fe74914 was wrong.47b564db00e5614f

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    What kind of 00b9727b37 idiot was he? Scoffing at himself, Sejoo 819a2e85d0 rose from his seat. With unsteady 5c082a28a8 steps, he c330dcb39e left the f3f5bdbee6 reading room 04b79c30b7 and headed 927c5e6a24 for the 0f25fb73f1 hospital roof.3c3e5836af4a4413

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