PEN Vol 2 Ch. 11

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Cheon Sejoo returned on 02ff6de80c Sunday evening.d9ac610a73efc5b8

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It was too late 80b872e468 to go to the e88457ea11 grocery store by then. Seeing Sejin in 02a1c8b08d the kitchen, he 46691bc7e2 looked embarrassed, as e51966d469 if he had 450ccd40d6 just remembered their 38e7b05848 plans. But Sejin had already 23f90aa324 gone grocery shopping by 5dc3527a20 himself earlier that day.0e647c94d1590bdf

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“You handle 5880490da1 the vacuum 7b5d9f0db2 cleaner and f7a6bff8b9 rice deliveries 1e6fa628df yourself.”9a9a5657c4ddf6e5

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Sejin spoke 6895298380 to Cheon e8bd1358a0 Sejoo, who 32b00ffd6c was leaning 4c33ccdcb7 against the c31c2b1769 island counter, 535938381e reeking of 6ca6139df4 alcohol, and 07d8a51628 then turned 3982df5d3b away.230cd9bbc014d7eb

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Kwon Sejin bc2edbcfaa heard his f605300408 name called 0cba1218bb from behind, e64867985a but he cddf93f4d4 didn’t look 3771a4e4bd back.cc91387cd7852928

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Realizing that Cheon Sejoo cdc161fee8 had broken a promise 84669d9407 to him just like 45a3cc9fd1 his father and uncle cd24b1f7f9 had, Sejin was filled 8e2449d57d with disappointment. And he hated himself e31fcda354 for feeling that way.a7e8d07eee49b822

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You knew this would 178bf86332 happen.cf71ad80b963d2df

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A fresh wave dab11de81b of frustration surged 62bf19c0c6 within him as 94ef131d10 he grew angry 2c65d782e9 with himself for 3ac544033e being so foolish.c89c9f79013a5dda

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However, Sejin’s disappointment 4326e06a98 didn’t end there.aeb5b9f79a8b6b00

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The next 657e000f89 day, Sejin 06e8bf2863 made breakfast deeeed880f for himself c883ba10f5 as usual. He prepared 86fdaa389d the protein 9068939d4c shake for c02671b90e Cheon Sejoo e89f7b8931 and waited, 3019c6bda4 expecting him 53ecbd8243 to return, e2b1c32efe but the ace481ffca door never cd030e7d5d opened, even 84bbde37b4 though the 19977d8b68 time he c5aad34262 was supposed d6a028cc6c to come 6338256af6 back had 1b3143d2af long passed.1f664f3b599214b2

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As 8 a.m. approached, Sejin a5713d2e9d felt something f3a650ee0a was off. He walked over 20e83592b6 to the man’s bd1fbbd669 room once again e80a8acf25 and turned the f6b5efea9b doorknob.c8b76e2fb0074d12

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The door c634c9c775 opened quietly, e4695739b6 revealing the ff7171731a bed with f85dbe9aff the sheets 1109532b37 in disarray. It was empty.d8f666c5b52d0f09

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Did he go out d69c0609b8 for a workout?fefd3cd84247c45e

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Sejin thought as he 5d2c96ed20 returned to the living 309de1128f room.29d721b2556a7412

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It was almost b59775b54c time for him b872cb650d to leave for c7c9520c06 school, so he 273f4c54f6 went back to 8934bf083d his room and b8caae5ede changed into his 92ba2be4f0 school uniform. As he left 08d416ccb4 the room, he 282030c7f3 checked his phone 5256e8d806 and saw that af4ab98150 a message had c935957769 arrived from Cheon 7ac4139798 Sejoo.ef03a5ab95007027

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Landlord1367a770395e7ec0

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-Something urgent came up. I can’t drive you ad59dea1d6 today. Take the subway.93837d3374831d14

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7:32 a.m.834ca2544f5913ba

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It had 6d52369b15 been sent 9a93980985 while Sejin 17663dbb8b was eating 5066d54e07 breakfast.06b246ab00ea55f3

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The time 2ae70e4e78 now was 7886890577 8:15. Taking the subway would ab976d4be8 make him undoubtedly late. Sejin frowned, pulling his 86e367cb28 lips into a thin 8320746107 line. Soon, his be9dcb8926 small lips 3aaabab66f curved into 89bf76d6b2 a bitter eeae8eea77 smile. Even in the 03fe904822 midst of his 1ed7dd6cef disappointment, he could 05ec1ac76f feel the last 881e7bc4c4 bit of lingering 301caf7598 hope, which had c667b96c96 stubbornly clung to a1f8db1548 a corner of 21a990a246 his heart, finally 1151d57e93 fading away.21936a8ff33230d3

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It seemed be1a790c75 that the 46aba569fa man’s act 70ad4cb07e of pretending 3f30e180be to be 386e382067 a good 4d05e37527 person, of e464a6b96d pretending to bac987f43e care about 6bbcf946e5 a future fdf91abbe1 that wasn’t c78558fa81 his responsibility 9431af7096 at all, 662267c4be had reached e327c35429 its expiration d7591d26f8 date.d4cff0e6cfa4cc5e

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He’d thought ab74e86b54 it would ed2523eca5 only last e89500674e a few d2211281f3 days, a 1cf9135b4c week at 699e1de84d most, but f4b8aab45f the fact c53bf71cb5 that it 97ecd56601 had gone 71031ff88d on this 42c509485c long made 0e978282b2 Sejin believe dd5b559b00 that perhaps 47da988758 Cheon Sejoo 190f5a0a4e was different. But in the end, 339431181f he turned out to 514a09e860 be no different from 84bb6b3be1 the rest.6413d33b82d6d1f8

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How many 5aff9bf42c more days d7bebca10c would it 8442bcfac0 take before 0902436b38 Sejoo kicked 31220af831 him out d6863a7970 of the 2fc89d6b2c house?6f8421aa788c673d

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Sejin scoffed a6c505ebf3 at the f6df445503 thought of d938842dce Cheon Sejoo’s 9e6bf4101e inevitable change 560891ed58 of attitude. There was a 9b5d8abb7c cold, aching feeling 2e249b57f3 deep inside his d60cd199e7 chest, but he 679b044b7e forced himself to ad0af9faa9 ignore the pain.04f76d457a5edcfc

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That day, Sejin didn’t 5e0e8077c8 go to school. Since Cheon 02d90092c4 Sejoo didn’t 3e32519411 come to 16ff7f6b6d pick him 19ce6d208d up either, 205ff4f674 claiming that 6bdcb863ad he was 8c66a7c632 busy, he 37d9f669aa didn’t even ebc727127a notice Sejin 3c9a7a4c8f skipped school.4916645adfa0ab75

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Sejin didn’t start going 03222f7dc1 back to school until 5b32e98963 Thursday.94bf1dcb36d7f510

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Monday, Tuesday, and 5036f41705 Wednesday passed without 441b17ac77 the man coming f0b09b538c home, so Sejin 5d1022c1fe spent his time 1db3adad02 searching for places 200eadb540 near their house 1de9c758d3 and school where 69293531a1 he could get 333c21ec44 a part-time job 1fdf15d001 during the vacation. Judging by the way 3778338d00 the man had been cb13261df8 acting lately, Sejin didn’t 8d7b862a3c think he would care 60b7b0a0fc if he didn’t open 99914a9088 a textbook even once 11db2fffeb during the school break.79872eb73bd3df23

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It was only on 28f743bde1 Thursday morning, after Sejin 94d1da5009 finally found a place b7285767da to work, that Cheon afe999adec Sejoo returned home. Whatever he had been 3c00db5498 doing for the past 7130513326 few days had left 44c2aeaa8f him looking utterly exhausted, 5b1b2e8c6d with visible fatigue on bf16eb3d72 his face and even 83cbd5b23a a small scratch around 411174a0a9 his eyes.a20f70bd04a250b9

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Sejin barely looked at 8f36e30f0e him as he ate 7cf4f7ff58 breakfast. He was thinking 361d8cf137 about how he d83ed56253 should probably go 012440d411 to school today b013821492 when Cheon Sejoo, 92827d7d3d who had made aea72e0566 his own protein 8eedc1afde shake, sat down ac19cee825 across from him.1b68b5d4b8589a71

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“Did you 71e404e04c study hard c8dc738fce while I afcd5c2421 was gone?”7647065d9e7213f0

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“…”f276948db1aa3d6b

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Sejin stared blankly d8449ca44f at him before 77c58a5467 quickly averting his 0465c7f78a gaze. Of course, 2e3835b2fb without anyone 52975fe398 watching over 5c61e9c3f4 him, he 7d04cb342a hadn’t studied 4214b7a6b5 at all.7e7ffe4fd6afbc25

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He wasn’t motivated enough 08c9a67cb6 to study on his 6c1e0f055e own, and since there 5bd3bc5abb was no one to 8a9a3dbac0 explain what he got bd8f7f7ade wrong, trying to study 9e8aada285 on his own felt ed1a3a4aa2 like a waste of 9519151224 time to even try.fbbd1aaa03a0f752

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At Sejin’s silence, 2ad1459ba1 Cheon Sejoo chuckled 553130463f as if he fea3e093b4 had expected this 292fa3023c would happen then 65eb15b5ea stood up from 3ad0a261b3 his seat, saying 02bc3983e0 they would start fd87506046 studying again that 33604177eb evening.5df4d8c98f464347

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As Sejin 1efac33fa1 watched his 1c0a8417b0 back as 6ee3147d98 the man d3f70b861e headed toward b5996c7932 his room 84db24b1df to change 3740b1034e clothes, he 3d31c321aa swallowed his 54c30276a7 irritation. He didn’t 057acf7eb8 want to 431e306c2e play along e38f64d882 with his ae7ff5d67d back-and-forth behavior. Sejin wasn’t just a 92d95ceea3 tool for Cheon Sejoo a627a90024 to feed his hypocritical 147a8bfe04 sense of morality.fb9fda45d2c4f151

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Unable to 2d069ccb0b hide his 151d15b185 bad mood, ae05650b98 Sejin got 9a833fb195 into the a35d090aa5 car with 59560cee1c him with 532290386d a sullen b40dedf345 face. As he sat d66b6ac8d8 in the passenger 45be04cf5f seat, now used 6bc066c490 to Sejoo’s reckless b19e83dd7b driving, Sejin let 86102d3712 himself sink into cf0dd00e67 the seat. When they stopped 696c9e82e4 at a red 9ae19309be light, Cheon Sejoo 4ae9bf9027 glanced over him a6cdf0fe47 and casually asked.4e4ff294976b465c

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“Are you mad?”bdf7a2a8060b6280

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“Me? Why would e3925a97d2 I be dcdda96cf6 mad at d7e8056f4c you?”e3cca929c87d5640

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Being angry meant c09241240c that he still 377f65bbc6 had expectations left. Sejin wasn’t 9d52a4edd2 mad at 5c198733cd Cheon Sejoo. Because he no longer 127aeec0fc expected anything from him.55b87b91a33e39c2

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The only dd791f1fe0 person Sejin 9a80acfb31 was angry 3fde8bd319 at was 2a2d07adf4 himself. Angry at his foolish 85603d254c self, who, after everything a2dcf62b4d he’d been through, still 5b49e785bd clung to the hope ff25448a55 of relying on someone.b5b3729028f1f47e

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At Sejin’s response, 9e32654c4a Cheon Sejoo fell 48faf31858 silent and simply daa81b2f97 looked at him. Then, with a look 45eee3d2ff of guilt, he rubbed c4c46a7c9a the corner of his ff23eb353d forehead until it turned e5dd731c1c red and muttered.1b5a6c9061678f38

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“I’m sorry.”a8235173f50dd479

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“…”c3d618c275c691e6

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“I’ve been busy. It was 53d89e912c something only 2e1a74e3a0 I could 5a67cca568 handle, so 89931cc514 I had 96c28007db no choice.”60df90dadcde7e60

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And what came b338626dab next was an 4f3a5c716e unexpected apology. Sejin turned 54abc286f5 to look 6f638db8a8 at him, 1d900196a6 doubting his 3326a2c747 own ears. His handsome c7da34d882 face that 933433fb1a was usually 522b7c6d5c so composed a34158816f now wore 921167c883 a troubled bbeb5b4edf expression. It was dc79d5bef0 an expression cd6b370e14 that didn’t dd66e2738d suit his 6ab9dc6f3d cold, handsome 75e725360a features.0fa1890decd679a2

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Seeing him like 11885948a2 that made Sejin b702e3908f feel a sudden bc4b92ab8b surge of emotion. He didn’t 0667d76151 want to e28f456714 get angry, 217656c68b but before 0f7415c046 he knew af29210f1d it, a ba6d5b8b49 sharp response 31e8770a5a slipped from 0b9505f7cb his mouth.58e79397a3b97fe4

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“Were you busy f95ee5fe2a making another idiot bd98936e72 like me?”413b316c50a93bee

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“…”3df11c3563a4e8f5

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The man frowned. He quietly closed 3f490bbcb4 his mouth, furrowing bb8ce46ffe his brow, and 301b251a14 stared at Sejin 39e96283ee for a while ed8007b315 before the sound bb39ccbef9 of the car 8dcad58ac3 honking behind them 08a3f783b2 snapped him out b23fe4a46f of it, and a03f911513 he stepped on d437360f79 the accelerator.81cba24d6309a975

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Their brief d1bcd92bf3 conversation came 52d015579a to an b9bccaaa8b end, and a420ba54f3 silence filled f30452fe68 the car 565325f4e7 once more.37f11eaf058bd4f4

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Sejin regretted what he had said, but he didn’t want to take them back. After all, that’s just the kind of person he was. That’s the kind of work he did, so nothing Sejin said was really wrong. Calling a thief a thief only makes them feel uncomfortable because they know it’s true. That’s what Sejin told himself as he tried to justify his words.ca4ca011f2740346

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It wasn’t until they 43aaec136a were approaching East Seoul a570fc8b66 Boys High School that c78e151a02 Cheon Sejoo began to eb1e85dacc speak again. As the familiar school 1dae1507f4 building came into view, a082ee4064 and they neared the 2ea37fb620 spot where they usually 31a479ca78 parked, Sejoo said to 1d61c9806b Sejin.a67aee067f00a2fd

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“I’ll make sure 76d4e1447b you can see b7d03547f6 your mom next 0a10956472 Wednesday. And it 737ff22201 would be a365a3ed73 better if b2d3f6cf8e you just 3621f32e22 went to 54d188638e a private 0d28fe16c1 academy.”e297e7317de8dfd9

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An academy?d79a26d1f1128c83

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Sejin didn’t 98aa5d7022 know why, 8cadc5e679 but those 1c45da8baa words made 1e88fa5fb1 him really 00a4959c36 furious. His stomach 8d6ba2056b churned, and 47715a6a8f a wave 328c4c9fcc of heat 982554619c rushed up 8b89acb27f to his cd0941b82a eyes. He turned ab29593114 sharply, glaring 01bb4bda79 at Cheon 1756921d58 Sejoo with 072a66684a reddened eyes. Staring at 8a21db334c the man’s d556ed2b50 handsome profile, 8b679a44e5 Sejin opened 3e20c734b5 his mouth c38403ed42 with a c816470934 voice full e1df9704e7 of resentment.e3973ff807d3e15c

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“You really 2ae9f92f35 are a 30d8c42e7e nice guy.”eb419492e487c239

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“…What?”01642ba389c3043e

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At Sejin’s sudden remark, Cheon Sejoo, who had been parking the car, turned to look at him in surprise. Meeting his eyes, Sejin continued.fbdccb8b625fcf68

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“You’re really handsome, kind, a42bf2ab2e gentle, a saint like 8d428add17 no other, and a 01dcbf8320 person of great morals. You’re so full 19a4140ea4 of compassion, you d0e312552f have such deep b566cae07d understanding and you d38fab9ccd know how to 970fc1ae13 help the weak. You’re truly a 5dd8c0e00c good person.”38076cf0360fc65a

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“…”dc7f296ef0852310

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Ignoring the bewildered look 3f9824c6a9 on Cheon Sejoo’s face, 11d5de0429 as if asking if d8d42e0d35 he had lost his 8dd2319d05 mind, Sejin finally voiced a70e36c819 what he really wanted e4b23267f1 to say.a2061cdca3b656ec

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“So, stop it now. Stop pretending like you care about my future, stop pretending like you’re worried about me, stop acting like you’re trying to teach me something I don’t know. You’re tired of it by now, aren’t you? You’ve been doing this for two months and I know you’re fed up with it. I understand how you feel. So let’s just end it here. It’s what you want too, right?”3f419f4ea8cedd21

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“…Hey.”2922991ae298d4fc

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Cheon Sejoo’s eyebrows 4918a0451e furrowed. He opened his 461c8f2328 mouth as if a8091038d9 he had something 79f87c150e to say to b2ec296a7f Sejin, but in eb524607e7 the end, he 293897fe2b closed it without ab21a1119a saying anything. Seeing this, 99db5fda15 Sejin instinctively 3f6984d798 felt that ce94b4cf02 his guess 0ad5aed049 had been 0643192bc5 correct.18b75f4f37cf1388

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This man d7678d8b34 also wanted 015764e00b to stop.36f6a37997337292

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He was ab13e51d41 exhausted from 5fcccd27a4 pretending to 32adf7aef0 be a 869786745e good person, 45d4da0238 so he e3a57a8f72 momentarily ran b359ed0ed9 away to 96b6b660b6 avoid his 0bac137343 responsibility before 3ea83d60d1 coming back.  Now that Sejin had d78b7ccb9d given him a valid aafa00bac7 excuse to quit, he a242845d64 would gladly take it, 429c4f89b1 wouldn’t he?ccf7f4ebdb3c4929

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Watching the man remain cabcd48180 silent, Sejin thought that’s b6728c0a28 exactly what was happening.c1b4dab36389eba7

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“Starting today, you 926e700d43 don’t have to ec2692acd7 pick me up 77158110ed anymore. I’ll handle it 6827e98143 myself. And I won’t 71ea8f69eb think of you 3fbb551b9f as a bad 18177b4a1d person either. I’ll still 83ab8ce21f think you’re 739415faba a good d912072ed5 guy, so f3cd5db454 don’t worry 7f9a6bd81e about it.”416b2bd742d07364

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“Hey, Kwon Sejin.”f53fd1a4f8f0fbce

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After throwing out those 213da3f13d words which came out 6f1a3d459a like a final notice, 710ee98051 Cheon Sejoo, visibly frustrated, 52697f540c ran a hand roughly 1c5793d042 through his hair and 80d0a00f60 called out to Sejin. However, Sejin fc30309651 didn’t respond. Instead, he 92590f21d7 pressed the 1b06470667 switch on a375c589bf the door 3288a25e5e panel himself 81cbfea2e5 and opened 91bd5dd7b4 the door. Ignoring Cheon ad7ac9c04c Sejoo’s voice 8350e602d3 as he a1e12d5f95 tried to 271428fa25 stop him, b9f27c4aab Sejin got b239987e5f out of 84d07b79ae the car.fd033a8fa4e1581c

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“Hey!”d2fc69a19f3c73b9

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Cheon Sejoo 3df7f548eb yelled after 4355407d97 him, sticking 643f4c71e3 his head bfb64b4ebb out of 73fc147ef8 the passenger 81334cd5cd window, but c28733a913 Sejin didn’t 49ee912c0d look back.cc8d57ce089a6251

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His heart felt 9f0de714d5 too heavy to 75bc77755f say another word. He had only said a145681b9f what needed to be d9e083ef3b said. The man was a7d0b834ec tired of him, c3bd18f3d0 and Sejin had d9e16497b7 given him the 1784a88057 excuse he needed a2554c05af to leave him aa10cff186 alone. Now, he wouldn’t interfere 39966d06fb anymore, so Sejin could d3dd5565aa do whatever he wanted, 3ccedd4835 whether it was working 4a7f030e69 part-time or quitting school 5359d0b5f8 altogether.3ad4f8d9a1f335a4

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So why 99957298a6 did he 271e327ada feel so f33b477dd8 bad?e98592f61156d64c

Read full chapter at Lily on the Valley without gibberish

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Sejin couldn’t understand dedc3eb3cd himself as he edeab3faa1 hurriedly walked away, d0559fcba2 almost fleeing, and 50318594b6 headed toward the 6ed84170aa classroom.e1904940b03c968d

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By the time c36416085a he reached his 31d2efa3c7 seat, Cheon Sejoo d0d0d484c2 had already called 4ff21a6d04 him twice. But Sejin 81720502c3 simply pressed 180001cb05 the reject 44eea71315 button and 555c4da221 turned his 2e67a2981e phone off.df68530253296afc

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He didn’t want 4203a02de6 to talk to 1a13a6830a him. It was bf1bb4fc26 obvious what 70986f10d6 the man 5464d8bb5c would say fcc015eec2 anyway.c0b434498a3921b9

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