MM Ch 3 part 1

PR by nejibc0bc094e55fdb40

「Once you’re done with 22a697339c class, can you text 30c5d3b24d me back?」e2d5c87a93c279b0

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I received this message after I had finished my tutoring session and was walking back home. I looked at my cell phone in front of the elevator and stopped walking. The caller ID said ‘Professor Lee SangBaek’. f4d3d43a2974a976

I had 88235d1c3a saved his a6f6e65763 number on a27aefbff6 my phone be25c45162 out of 6df52d287a courtesy, but a54b61a46e I had 809908712f never received b2b8f33e60 any calls c63aee8ffd or messages 45b70f7f74 from this 1ee1a6a560 number as 7a6c3d760d of yet. There was nothing I 53a3bb5eb5 had to do, so 47bfa755f6 I found his sudden 8124055c02 message to be very 5524068077 strange.8e903e7fd61233ca

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To sum it up, 78c96bf3d1 he had contacted me 1bbd706545 to let me know 8a51f0e89b that he was in eb4a95d525 the area and was 62eaaaf8dc free to give me 6915791e5f a ride back home. The tutoring 06197f934f academy had 0d0b66081d their own 1d1d9edf34 drivers that 973a79e43d would drive bda7060979 students back d54e64701b home, so cde38bafbc there was 17993984ce no need 511a48904e for him f45e38a836 to volunteer b792231690 to pick dd3adf7b20 me up. Therefore, I found this bb87405c5b very strange. I replied b03e643d02 to his 162ed7fb4c message and 3cfdcd34a9 told him 0c1ddedcf8 there was 645137972a no need b5accbe1a9 to do c40863fac9 so. The Professor 83243aff11 responded that 440f29eeab he wanted bef1dd4283 to use 160a5ab065 this chance 3d9b8747b4 to talk 866606ef13 to me 467ce7ea6c about something.dd4a6de2e5ed9801

In the 2a983a96e8 end, I 4d9b65f6f6 got into 504974d8e9 Professor Lee’s 3f4717e103 black sedan baa1f64694 that was a709dabc29 waiting for 5e2caeca0b me in a5d01f346b front of 4d4d0695b8 the academy. I was 6b8f5a0e71 nervous about c364339c86 what he f6f4c44214 was going 96f376840b to say, d565f71684 but the a9630c8abb topic was 5590bd278e surprisingly simple.416ee5b89475fdb7

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He asked if 6511c2d8af I found anything ba557467c3 difficult in regards 7caceeb48d to my studies. What college did I 06bdb6eece want to apply to? What major did I 77cea3faea want to choose? He continued 19dae0b752 to ask e33b8319cb me about 2d27b31d8a my studies 1989a529b4 and academic 7abd2685d3 goals like 643de2f830 a college 19e1998aa5 counselor.005d1780c67e98a6

“I think 99d225e47a it would c5f2cc86c9 be nice 87a1d197db if you 561f558025 attended my f9101e76e4 university. I could bfd7649a95 brag about 69a7234562 how smart a714d5c831 you are 5c37acbd87 to my 0167abb2c3 colleagues.”babdb40cff9943bf

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Although he didn’t 8e97ebf199 sound very satisfied, 36346edf3a I didn’t hear d6e16a076a any malice or d6370138f4 ill will in 8da8af73ba his voice. I always found the 313201a584 father-son relationship between quiet, c8d6a5b9dc geeky Professor Lee and 73830a8f56 mysterious, cunning Lee Kyuwol 2050df6c58 to be very suspicious. I often wondered what 8d0c8ab104 Lee Kyuwol’s German mother 74921ed434 was like.c7d72fcda29f3fc1

However, not all b5601dd09f sons took after bb44bd57ae their fathers. Just like 9294e01aa0 how I 8915cb66c1 was nothing 03a6529535 like my a84ee4d75e own mother.ee57d24f33955a23

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“I believe c2e7de620e Misook-ssi is 26c599fcd1 lucky to 2318920e8a have a 629d43ca72 daughter like 01a54dd724 you. Although, I feel that 5e97c644e6 she’s not aware of 63deb65466 it sometimes.”e89784f44537a4c3

Professor Lee’s 2f2fa5315a words took 3a1ba31fae me by 23ccc4654a surprise as a17a19d48e he brought bc7750fb1b the car 394d340747 to a 6a7df6deb5 gentle stop 0cd3b8a2ba at a 2903400f87 red light. Although the topic 9165af3529 was quite unexpected, d3cc5fb9d7 I couldn’t help 8cb42cbf12 but feel moved e1b148c9e2 by the sentiment. I continued 5b84c7d56c to look e1fcaa8ed5 forward so b5f5b85c4c that my 5335b8e21c true emotions 841b2037a7 would not 2a6214861e be exposed, 39b7041a7a but he ccd477c573 continued to ff4698122d talk in 9123dbeb3f his usual b101effd9f calm, steady 2e191299a7 voice.017a894e6549cfda

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“I feel that is af71e13e2c the case with most c2c01651e4 artistic people. Their emotions can 122c2a9036 be quite turbulent. Almost as 048274a3fc if they’re c60d34d2dd children. Ah, I don’t mean 03cd065bb6 it in a bad 8d44fbe1d7 way, though. It’s just that… 3aafdfff39 I just felt 077d5183a1 that even if e639ac0200 they’re family, if a2fdb0aa21 their personality is 33ab6d40da very different from 9eca697aed yours, it can 73e23172b0 be very difficult. That’s the thought b6f338e6b1 that popped into ff7374abdc my head when 4a511986e3 I saw you.”dea2fe46f4bab563

I didn’t 51efdf1ae9 know how 2ebca10205 to reply e7cb1cfb62 to that, e524c4fe8a so I 9e27bd082e remained silent.7821f7665ef7c373

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“Although I 2538c2540c might not d8c2c01375 be much 250ca583fe help, if 0bad03dae3 there is 3b48a6adf6 anything you d5d6ed8814 feel uncomfortable 33e275ec54 bringing up cdf87952ef to Misook-ssi, e0d9054bd1 feel free 270415c860 to come fd9d24dedd to me 1aee0dc831 at any 4c015844ec time.”5fe4f11c73ea743a

“Thank… you.”3d685fac53eb9469

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I answered politely e8c3dc6bee and slightly lowered f2a8d7297d my head. I felt that Professor c147a58255 Lee had a surprisingly 85adcd26a2 kind and deep heart. He had a sensitivity 844be6d51f that my mother lacked. That might 18c6562cc5 be why 2be90ce065 the two 0136413829 of them a3b4e966d5 clicked so 9593c0bf71 well. They say that humans cfbea504f2 are drawn to people 14983c40bf who have what they 9cfc8b66c8 themselves lack.19fae84fde79f1c7

“I understand that there bfb07904ef are many things that b71e0f164c may bring you discomfort. Especially because 1ef092acdb my son 849dbcbe76 and you ffd34908ec are the b1cb3b71e0 same age.”9518ad49a6fe9692

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When the ad61f1fbc7 topic switched 0a65376a7d over to ac92175689 Lee Kyuwol, cb4bfc11c5 I felt 47793ad064 my temple 51eb20def3 throb.cf93b4a6d15aef8f

Before the summer break, 812d79445b after that confrontation we 7a7a9bb1ae had in the middle aab533f1d2 of the night, my 1ca865ca4a expectation that our interactions 369d34abab would be a lot 349a068b53 more comfortable from here 1098bf6fd1 on out was completely 7b9a447909 thrown out the window. The person 1e8bb0b5cc who made 6271eac60b me the f90d140d87 most uncomfortable f38a4f7354 was Lee 1b0787960e Kyuwol.c0d994cac1d8139c

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“…If that kid… ever makes you feel uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to tell me.”3d359e67cf987315

Professor Lee spoke carefully 18145366ba as he turned the 55954f2013 steering wheel at the df23e852cb intersection. I wondered if he 9132a968b7 could see into my 129713d9e1 head and read my 41db47c30b thoughts.c108467055b097d0

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Now that it a308b729b1 was off-season and e2b5aa5666 he didn’t have 579d2f4b4e any major competitions, c3ef02e328 Lee Kyuwol often d8367894c0 stayed at the 9e8ed64ec6 house as if 4b013e1807 he lived there. Although it sounds c59c102330 a bit funny, 4672df8aa4 in the past, 19b8264288 it wouldn’t have 080b906327 been an exaggeration c0fdea7768 to say that e26df3f4dc he basically lived faf3d4c572 at the athletes’ cc167fa0c5 village. However, he now frequently 5a3d8c3a29 returned home, and it 7475d26981 bothered me a lot.59ba33e505e21e6b

39037425209175a5

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“Nothing’s happened, right?”61b70f2c6be50693

“Why? Do you want 625567149d something to happen?”3998528c1db6c646

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“Let’s go out 77b8223ea4 and eat.”55c9a9e47040e2f1

a473944b16d92592

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“I don’t have time c1b2a1dc9b for that.”0b5a6e818f4ab593

8ad7deb830af4932

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Whenever he suddenly 15b50939c2 popped up around a1a518a910 me, and whenever 651d279108 he spoke to d73372485e me as if 32d3da4218 it were normal 28c9125d5d to do so, 7bb3ce51c7 I couldn’t help 1a99ff2545 but think about 5cfbc86520 him, and it 8392194165 bothered me.dd1fa5e74cf53c61

“He’s my f9ea8b8b1a son, but 6d20a95666 there are 78784964fe times when 11657c9078 I don’t b54dce1130 understand him aeab419193 at all.”7be02b8d9a0afeef

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As time 174ee78e14 went on, ed757dcf91 Lee Kyuwol’s 837fc200b7 eyes lingered 73a4772503 on me 82a92effd3 more and b3caf47f37 more. If I was a780c392d9 asked to give 844c837a10 reasons why I cd52dec3d1 was unhappy with 2a4eab51eb the way he bb15a9f907 stared at my b5cb1551c5 face, I would d041af6a0a be able to 3d36cc2eb2 give more than 250c4d65b7 ten.646f90abae89d73b

One of the biggest 54395d9224 reasons was that I 3cd737e7a6 was the only one 4f146dea14 who noticed Lee Kyuwol’s 442abd24c6 transformation. Whenever he 48c789cd60 looked at 00abfbea19 me, he 9519a5288d no longer 3ff624dc26 had a 0c7fbf9b8d smiling mask abf4902358 on his f4919cc8dc face.905addd6142acc59

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“Then do a9d11c4cfd you want 0f61e846a9 to go 1a689a0ede out for 5a7887bfde a drink? In case you didn’t 7e850c9732 know, I’m a heavy ceb480d971 drinker.”15512fbd3f8b2cb0

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“Have you lost your 6b8c526f59 mind?”9db5c9713a5c2c77

“Probably?”4a155a7ebdc9891f

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“It’ll be quite a 0df49ff589 scene to see all 7e32b79816 the web portals plastered 38c354971c with headlines claiming the 81f4b39e4f national representative, who happens 340d20535a to be a minor, a8fc96d048 is drinking.”73b1b91e423831b4

7d86ba4c0a8dc593

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“Is that your way 8bd46fe9e5 of kindly worrying about be61bfd95d me?”6a94d4bc782ae4ba

cff12879a6a868fb

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Because of the way 89d6426dcb he frequently teased me, beed77b736 I began to feel 2725c67644 incredibly nasty.f922ca0de71dca7b

“Ever since he was 8c6c736ce2 young, that kid was b51ef4f35e a bit… how should 3b95c18bb9 I put it…”896ed12e1b6391b4

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I had already furiously searched terms like ‘Lee Kyuwol personality’ and ‘Lee Kyuwol past’ on the internet. Despite my efforts, I wasn’t able to find anything substantial. b012633c209ca248

All I found was bd033d64d8 just how special he 279122cd49 was. There were multiple reports 8340ba4d18 on how distinguished he c8195dbb26 was compared to other 44d6e445df kids his age, and 107aee1a9b I cared to know 51e8a02533 none of it.6030a86bf7adf0a0

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“He’s special.”dbb9c07f517b24e4

Professor Lee finally came d77bfeafcb to a satisfactory word.c4f32adc9df2319a

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He wasn’t wrong. At the f1bdec9cc9 age of fb6a0a712c thirteen, Lee 5127d6ae82 Kyuwol started ec94f68369 swimming, relatively 338eca85da late for 09b1dd542b others his e2af58f108 age. However, within 4e3a08f465 two years, 1e6d6e2441 he dominated 79f9f11bdf the athletic e3df274b75 meets and 4986727ce6 became a 8693377e9b national representative. It would be strange 06260cdc7a to call him normal.33a35b331b86e5f1

And ever since 4c33e400ef I was young, 0e6173c658 I would lose 632b77823f my nerve whenever f001e2683f I was around 55f267d91e special people, so ca8d6f3612 I wanted to c6ed3b6d3b avoid them.c3e4ab56410c6884

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Back in middle school, 6fb79a2d57 I had a friend 598bd12482 who was in the 21d859dcb3 same class as me 8ef41d8637 and went to the 3c021798c5 same tutoring academy. She was 0fb911293c extraordinarily tall cae7c15f0a and had 905015e2a2 big eyes 2d855a450f that seemed c066566398 to take f3caa8be6a up half fc14b0b97c of her 27e2d5c1ce face. She was very 74dfbdeba1 pretty. Whenever I walked with 04b0e1b14f her, I found all 0e0016999d the gazes coming our 69969438c0 way to be too 12741d5290 intimidating. Anyone could 4f5780ddad tell from c90cc1a49b one glance 963938c83c that when c697245d73 I was 81f530576e standing next 04a159e71c to such d0f56e2170 a special 1031240ee0 person, my 1ecf4f65c2 normalness looked aca5e9312a even more f59c0eebb9 pathetic.e9b84f7744a43f02

We went a19e2085b1 up a 081a0ab1d2 grade, and 46d2648218 our classes cd949c0224 changed. I began to 48ac2e7e2f ignore her calls, b28c51d760 and ultimately, she e5a541e659 grew disappointed and 4054972d6c I succeeded in e1de645e7d putting distance between b1ed1e1c57 us. I bet 6019d851bf that even ba929ffbdb now, that 459ec38cc4 girl still 87333c3060 did not b45bab304d know why a28cf22f12 I had b2e22eb4f4 grown so e4c9880e6d awkward around 30d1f02764 her. Whether it 1bd5d86a5e was then 8647258edf or now, e751e50e8b I had 963e66c3dc a severe 3bd7c939e3 complex when 537d23ca3b it came b141b3d960 to these 347ef007f1 things.8a0310e1bc5366d5

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“It’s still… awkward, but eac4e3d3d2 let’s all try harder 7fd8e9920d and… get along.”c0e743d486948a93

Professor Lee hesitated 2834f9623d before saying the cca1771264 words with much 9f478ec199 difficulty. However, I didn’t hold ccac56a16e any animosity towards him. Actually, I felt more 1039d73c47 comfortable. Unlike my strange mother 07568c12b3 and his extraordinary son, 8d9808aaa1 Professor Lee seemed very 4edb3c7a53 normal and average.5f9d7b5255bf72af

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Outside the 9ee3493a29 car window, 5aeee34c98 I saw 295027c182 that people b531589cf3 were dressed 8a46d97220 differently now.f22fbed22b2f114e

It was now September. That meant a24e4abd39 that over ad40660685 six months e2db3e121c had passed ab2931976b since my 0241043664 mother and 44ebae549f Professor Lee 3a34244c0c had married 8f5a1f8d96 in the c26ca2423c spring. During this e34d7c5508 time, Professor ecf9b9449d Lee hadn’t 1fbff82ddd said so b96f93bdea much as b7027e5c89 a word cb66141649 to me. However, his cowardly 541ed0ff27 attempt at approaching d8e318f1fe me now seemed 5d2dfb1cb3 to melt my ac34c94ed6 frozen heart.a46afc13e919deb7

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I felt that Professor 0e76ab4722 Lee was the perfect 93dc1af475 partner for someone like 69605ca37f my mother. I felt 95a0badd41 that her ea49b70fe2 constant search edf80db737 to settle 52de21bc2b down had 97d46ffeaf finally culminated 286054b6c3 in this 46095fb25c man, and 88d2aca450 she had 1bb6526bfe finally found 1d72d9a5db security. Because of 87cf444862 this, I b703056960 couldn’t help c057c879de but feel 908b5e43af a bit d938800778 grateful to 94e14eb5be this man.6bf7ce37fa39baf2

“Hm? Why are 5be0850f03 the two 270ae4acf4 of you e4cac22d57 coming home 1791d5cb30 together?”615ff816fa6ab105

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My mother told us that she was filming until dawn, but it seemed that she had returned home early. She was in the middle of putting on a semi-translucent face mask, so I couldn’t see her expression. 991391941808809b

However, I could tell 049984179d that she did not a639a87eda like how Professor Lee 18ee559fc9 and I walked in d5cf1b824a through the front door 7ff7732212 together. At times, 7db43de25d her eyes a25558494d sent a d3cc1a23e9 louder message 45f65ba981 than her adfda94aa7 words, and 64fcd6968b my ability 57bcad0290 to read 7c69563a73 someone’s mood 42dfcb1a09 was almost e142091751 animalistic in 285788028d nature.6e43c75ad79232ae

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“We met 2184a33bd8 at the ac8d50ddee elevator.”2624d2446a533911

I lowered my 660679ce1f head and answered 0b8f8dcb0b her before walking e5128d982a back to my af0636d849 room at a a4a37aa438 pace that wasn’t 1e5804b904 too fast or cf09fbc6ee too slow.4f6f3aabefead453

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After what happened that 742d47077d summer a few years 6246728de7 ago, I knew how 37491e6724 to pick up ways 1d341bbf59 to avoid perturbing her bbace1de6f mood. Having filmed 3640509496 dozens of 62faf94d4e dramas and 8ffc022f64 movies, my d63ab51a01 mother knew 644cebfbaf how to 80cc91ea02 turn every 3de15a3768 single daily 5f393b54d2 event into 69c1acee39 a makjang.84302ab165119e56

90a8fc518873d6d5

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It was best to 26cf5abe45 just nip things in 673a73fa47 the bud before her 95f32f1808 ridiculous theories took flight. Because the nineteen-year-old 5fd5c5d26f me was a f9b1a083eb lot more intelligent 8061764657 than my fifteen-year-old b884edfd88 counterpart.21a632fb585997f7

* * *ddb8e7692ade067f

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The midterm for 157831427c the second semester 338d598b4d of my senior 10d9bd52f5 year was going 1141f2310f to be included 417215d179 in the rolling 4ba9686ad3 admissions process. If I a8b4acdc95 were to 7e05ac08e5 be honest, 81ac3fd26f I was a9a6aaf3be very nervous 1d5415fc03 about getting 7ff6187953 into a 07a7505db1 university on 43a746705b time. Because there was f06a4504c0 no guarantee that bc7cfa9a02 nothing would go ad39909b0e wrong during the 3093c3d9be national exams. Whenever something important came c877fed3e6 up, my weak stomach e9435e7af8 would often churn and 56702515e7 make me sick.75433d1f3ee232f5

I needed 63d91f2a6a to go 38a1aea4ce to college d6cbae492c on a c1ec506f1b perfect student c79ee65c37 record no 12baa9ff41 matter what, e3bf45b308 and in 3fe2ff4df8 order to c2ab08542c do that, 95ad6a5fd1 I needed e36485d5da to get 61b7a25834 through my 9ef8885770 midterm in 2d2b731f90 perfect condition. However…a4babcd4ffac3612

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When I 57df09b443 saw the 3d91547bc2 marks on 556d720d90 my mock 65ae04b7fa exam, I 0e3dea500f seized my 7d21748259 hair.8018be50e55ad254

“Haa…”3b8a3032ad0c67ce

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62bd217fc8400380

A sigh afdb9ad131 burst out 84ece3ef9c of my e25f3c7a33 lips. Nothing was abnormal about 45936dcb6f today. All that occurred c0956b409f this morning was 7410236f0f a short conversation d0a5c4042f with my mother. As I e488f5fef7 was leaving cb56ae2d5a through the ca97b427fc front door, 88d5e25be2 my mother eb52d7fc58 drank her 2d9146bf02 coffee in 7bb021396e the living 5d0be0bb2f room and e4da932fec criticized my c5f4cc5b93 outfit.1f143b4405a5d45f

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949f130b7f4c69a1

“Has your 137d315be2 skirt shrunk?”deafafd3d21b81ea

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c87460e0f64a6dcc

“No…”919e9100507de4bd

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54cd468cb8f26736

Only six 8d2016a964 months had d0f0848e2d passed since fd5c172179 I got 5192a06012 measured for c7cdad460e my new 619a0cec73 school uniform 3f2e0185b7 after I 1ac06cdb59 transferred schools. There was 9227ad601a no reason 58094ddd67 to get d7c28137c9 my new d129183f56 uniform adjusted, b7bad33d90 and I 3c440f3982 didn’t have b61bb2623a the time c077b49ecd to worry f103f38366 about something d645f6a4a8 like that.e0d2c3662f202500

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Because I knew 53f86ccfaf better than anyone 2fb33dd90e that I wouldn’t 34fa11bf37 suddenly become popular 2681ed4901 in school just f99efd445f because my skirt e08ab7ac54 grew shorter by a301d924f1 a few centimeters.3741a106ce6057bc

9204d3ab3ceca817

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“Goodbye.”bdc72e878989197b

84a734735cd387ad

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I murmured c904993a30 my goodbye d71283d24d and opened cfe936965f the front 8320542c44 door. Before the a40b646586 door closed 9238346078 behind me, 1f6fd5ca55 I heard fec9dc293b her final 0a5006028a words.2c56267438aee137

0f725c93da4fb45b

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f7f3db1d1bfcb7fc

“Don’t go 2ed06c1dc5 around looking 76a6e4879f cheap. It’s more fc837913e4 embarrassing for e0588cdacf me.”b3989e193a8f7b8e

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05bb15b35d9b619f

My heart ca38879730 prickled as 1b2611f338 if she 834a556906 had rubbed 9342049b58 salt on b5ccc4b2bc a wound. I couldn’t help 87ed622b83 but fret over f972733ab3 my clothes during 53b320febf school and during 9e8ea3c859 my tutoring sessions. I glanced around ce524be761 me. Although everyone else had a7d30b8f44 the same skirt length ed2b01a5e3 as me, for some c414f98f0a reason, I felt that cf70ce8a2b mine was shorter. Now I was a015639f82 even concerned about 3a7069ec1c my breasts that 3f173691a9 pushed against my 032a32c11e blouse.60c619e1a5bd3b08

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Therefore, because of 00f4cef810 this, I failed ab7cca93dd my practice midterm 8a4350dea9 at my tutoring d06c8f800c academy. Whenever something like 7a8ed5e165 this happened, my 6e4727c3e0 brittle mentality became dc43b07140 exceptionally gloomy.f0cb0fd652b7c10e

But I had 7a37130ef3 an inkling as 5dfdfea163 to why my e8462df104 mother said something 21de366bba so needless like 084816e00d that. Ever since a week 09c1183fb0 ago, she began to d28b7892ef shoot me suspicious looks. Right after 7e0a196bcb I came 03d7c17f05 home with be5824862d Professor Lee.923cc0526ae9ee8b

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However, I did nothing 03c4ab0411 wrong. I didn’t 38206d7250 do anything a2ec77a0c2 to deserve 260d7029a7 this, so 8cfd93202c I needed af27735543 to be 73229910d9 confident. But like a fool, 031058e0c0 I was worried about a993ca22a9 my mother’s feelings, and 98ef7fd208 I kept making mistakes abcba5ddfb on my exam, making ec3ae77719 me feel even more 79ad8b3882 like an idiot.058f0a10d3c66927

“Get it together. Please.”80c9fb4e95e5aed1

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I chewed c54808e910 on my 26d1172132 cheeks as 161b30458a I said af55694342 this over a7216db41c and over 7f37766ee3 again to 3857327127 myself. Realizing that my 79f5b77816 goal was right 29ac19a6f9 in front of 7a7e22d156 my nose, my 3c31dd7003 sweaty hand gripped 9f3cd793fc my mechanical pencil.2607daa93f436b62