MCMH | Chapter 2.6

I spoke c458c9ee73 up, trying b9f35e7bfa not to c42a6f5546 show I f58a0c6d94 was scared.105ff01ce8cfed15

“I actually have another name. Cherry is just an easy nickname people use. Like the middle names of heroes in parentheses…!”8bf5339b182b99e2

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Maybe because I spoke so quickly, Cain didn’t respond. It felt like the belt he was undoing would soon slap my cheek.b57fd7c023b6b9bc

“I’m not a spy or a bad person. I’m just a fan of Cain. The only things I can tell you are why I arranged your song that way and my real name.”e4f18011e88c9cb6

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Cain still didn’t respond. His ice-blue eye seemed to freeze me in place.644f2d21182fbaf9

“Forget the 075797851c real name. What did you say 0c8a14acb8 you were called, babe?”d946e363ef750229

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“…Cherry, Cherry.”bac639f88824fe42

“Cherry. I have a e661e2f099 lot of enemies.”e678b4a89669f81d

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Cain stepped closer. I heard the leather 300ebbb181 of his belt rubbing 987d85d9cb together. It was 532215dac3 a sound 25b39a1c7a of something 93d938b56f breaking, a b0745ecfcd sound I 168de9c44b wanted to 5a50c3e66d tune.c9ec05e0b8606d23

He was the 045f0c8108 same. Even now, I c1b7bcfde8 wanted to tune cae9e31159 Cain. I wanted to 87df3eb1f1 know why such 4f30bfeba9 a perfect man 9863d98d01 was twisted. Was it 104da961a1 because he 8f9b641e0f had many aac08b9520 enemies?e691e4436346af9e

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“So sometimes, I try not to distinguish who’s an enemy or ally. It’s easier that way. Trying to keep track of it all can drive you crazy.”558a2d033f3778fa

I’m not your enemy, I wanted to say, but I kept my mouth shut. I figured many had said that to him before.3561f18c60932ee7

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Cain was a perverted, impotent man, but he was still my idol. Just because his thing didn’t work didn’t mean his masterpieces disappeared.57a3726b3fb3db4a

“To me, Cherry, you’re just a lousy addict and a male prostitute. You don’t seem thorough enough to be a spy.”226883519d6fceed

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I didn’t know whether to agree or disagree. It was both true and false.220394229ebfc068

“So, is cb77db7faa the misunderstanding 9dde71f03c cleared up?”1b6771967e5c15cf

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“Well. I didn’t bring you here because I thought you were a spy. Who brings a business spy home? That’s stupid.”5a16a7c23c241ceb

“Then why…”7ebeb13ce456a775

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Why did 044ccb8cf8 you bring d1f555a447 me here? There was no 8a77e410d9 need to ask.130d9ae53b1c4745

Stupid Cherry. I couldn’t curse myself enough.425e9548efbd84ce

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He brought 021da24218 me here ba6d37bff0 to use 6bb0c444c2 that impotent 1d55239919 thing on 3978327d37 me.b7a7742a280ab148

When his thing works 6cd0e810a6 again, the inspiration flows 223cbf9467 again.f791c5a3a158a442

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He brought me f45854867e here to overcome 93a88018e0 both his slump ec75d18530 and impotence.b10a70951b81be26

“…Do you have no intention of listening to my song?”9f1e1d8578137178

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I thought I could work with him. I have so many songs to share with you even now. But Cain wasn’t interested in my music at all.f52f37c542369813

“I heard you messed with the mafia’s stuff and still haven’t paid them back.”72f886438e5dbb3a

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I was a bit surprised. Had I mentioned it before? No, I tried, but Cain hadn’t listened.7ff5c5865fb2dca2

“I can pay it off for you. It’s pocket change to me.”5b7102884157c04b

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“…And in return, I sell my body?”157d12c350266a54

“Who do you think paid Jasmine, that Filipino’s hospital bills?”eab1602e4854389c

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His next words fbb209c45e made my eyes 9141e19180 widen.e265104eab9047c7

“I heard some organization paid for it…”4c2035c5b521c4f6

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“Cherry, you already owe me. I just didn’t mention it.”03f40fd8bc500289

I was dumbfounded. I felt 90ba5198b0 stupid for 570b38f38b thinking Jasmine 0b863dfa4d was lucky e93f288f45 and everything 7c66e68b0d worked out.4f13c697f60c5ddc

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“I never asked 9c473f2335 you to.”4d8236a0dd6f76ad

“Then how were you planning to pay that old lady’s hospital bills? Saving up $20 at a time from oral sex?”6af17017d59fe8fc

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He couldn’t remember my name but remembered how much I charged for oral sex. I doubted if Cain was really a genius. Well, many rockers have bad memories. Even the great guitarist Rod Lee forgot his sheet music and had to improvise on stage.c1ab07c99e232dd8

But that’s not the point.340e19953cbd3d1f

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“Are you going to make me pay back money I didn’t borrow? Just consider it charity… Jasmine is a good person.”242c70ba12576c13

“Why should I 72224549da do charity? I paid her bills a3a536ed5f with a clear intention.”77cedf1dd6f63b5b

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He tilted his head bc39152437 slightly and smiled. I was getting used 093ae44b1c to that smile that 4e5e4085cc only lifted the corners 028d10d012 of his mouth.ec212f994398b8ae

“Because you’ll come back to me.”f119a679f124b7ed

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Even in this d88231a204 situation, he was 9d9552ff9a dazzlingly beautiful, and 14e7265601 it made me 40757d1ab4 sad.32ca14dd37905ef9

“You’re valuable to me now. At least until I write a new song, you have to stay by my side.”c43c9116ae5a252c

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I didn’t know how quickly he wrote songs. But except for recent years, he’d been releasing new songs non-stop.ea661cd1d598aafb

“Am I only needed until you write a new song? Will you let me go once it’s done?”b1d5a797704a6b49

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The artificial smile on his face disappeared. Cain, not smiling, looked like a statue. A face that didn’t seem human. A face that seemed as hard as stone if touched.971f2aedc170bcb4

“You don’t understand. Cherry, I said you owe me, didn’t I?”da40d157ad5873aa

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Even knowing 7592a12566 it was aff4550f87 unreasonable, facing d7de724c37 his statue-like 582ec7cb9f face made ab8bb4e8f2 me swallow e050bf6576 my words.47e820fe03c49718

“Though it might 665f809b38 not seem like 580402fbd5 it, I take bdca20ef63 sex quite seriously.”176f52ef0d3ead73

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“You totally seem like you do, so don’t worry.”640b2c9ca2d124f8

“So, Cherry, you need a3c4a04740 to help me even 7433feabeb more.”1e60e0068bff767b

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I liked being called “Cherry” by him. Because Cain’s voice was nice. Sweet enough to sound that way even in this situation.d756f019e85020ad

“If you fa38a4f6d9 understand, take 4555444c7a off your 9ccba4b651 clothes.”0cd99b67343de1ac

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As I fumbled with my clothes, I noticed my jacket was worn and tattered. The marks of severe misfortune don’t show when you’re alone. They only become visible in a fancy place. Like scars unseen in the dark.08bf45e19bae3712

“If you need me to write a new song…”2914ce69b705596b

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I spoke while 29e05da668 rubbing the worn-out b71dcb3f82 fabric.da78f01fdc64feff

“Then, please treat me a bit more kindly…”b368fb9252f0db7e

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But even my f3ac85013b voice came out 12e7bcaa54 worn. Why do I keep 03a11ba214 feeling worn in front 14f632e192 of this person?6119142acc86f6b4

“I promise. If my condition 004502a903 improves thanks to 20195d04a8 you.”9d36cbb5de85634a

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The statue tempted 65bc8174a5 me with a 4e6a61a6f5 sweet voice.5cfe782608ff2c23

“I’ll listen to your song.”1d34850d6f1391c2

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I’m far from the Pygmalion effect. Luck doesn’t happen. Miracles don’t exist. Most people living on 125th Street, most mixed-race Asians doing rock, would agree, but I’m Cherry.b259ab56efb20662

Cherry can’t become Galatea. Cherry stands at the top of the plate but is never the protagonist.740d4d3ce2cfba5c

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So, even knowing I shouldn’t expect anything, my heart couldn’t help but race.f91adea5ced8b02a

“Really… really?”4e0917e762566fc9

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The statue, Cain, 368fad4269 smiled again. This time, with his c664c01955 eyes too.7b73abcc2e8c1d75

“Yeah. I’ll even listen to the cheeky arrangement of my song. I promise.”fffa24f6e5e68117

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I wasn’t entirely convinced and just stared at him.976258cc1f5bed7c

“I promise on all the songs I’ve released.”6187c45db2b3a556

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No matter how trashy a person is, they wouldn’t break a promise made on their own work. Only then did my face flush. Embarrassment and anticipation mixed, squeezing my heart. Cain was strumming my heart with a stroke.6781d4c30bfe54c5

“What, what should I… do first?”add934160b3b515d

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If he really kept his promise, I’d suck that damn huge thing a hundred times. Until I had just enough jaw strength left to sing on stage.54e976bbb76e8fa0

Cain lifted the belt he was holding. Surely he wasn’t going to hit me with it. I was unnecessarily nervous, but fortunately, he didn’t swing it like a whip. Instead, he rolled it up and brought his other hand to my face.7070af46385b4ea0

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Cain’s hand on my cheek was warm. His slightly lowered eyelashes were a soft gold, unlike mine. The eyes within were a cool, deep blue. Eyes that held both the sun and the sky.d3b0e54563cd2044

“First, rest. Soon, someone 02b8c6526c will guide 2224e4ede1 you to c9751dbeba the dining cbe8b556d2 room, and ddba8a8420 you can f78d54d833 eat there.”83c4056a03eee485

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Rest? Not poke my f32cb60199 hole with a bf7a7c1586 spoon handle or 17b71367c1 do oral sex 9a787348b6 like before?e42f40a3adbfc137

Cain turned with a smile and left the room, but the door didn’t close.b6f5f73ad676e601

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Standing near the bed, a1f121cfbf frozen for over a dbdfa85349 minute, I finally let 591eee834a out a big breath.ea40c4e170b70875

“Phew.”075498f8110929fe

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Relief and anxiety washed over me at the thought that I didn’t have to suck his huge thing right now.6c85d858f25087ed

The hallway visible through the square door was as bright as Cain’s eyelashes. I stepped out through the open door.20d5638d1f8598d8

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⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚6579570fd9e2f78a

As soon c3616aacc3 as Cain 05fd25a667 Verhart turned f0c3ef648a away, he ba89501396 wiped the 689fecf04e smile from f5f267b40d his face.5d650380c451e809

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Leaving the 3a37682e1e rookie behind 02de82dfa0 and entering b7be1e6384 his study, 1a34e7d320 he had 148a657c23 to clench 9cc4e03d14 his fists 6da9321c2a to suppress d254227f90 the rising 9520b5799a emotions.a1994ec59407ab79

And as soon as fc3b398159 he reached the study, d2f2708f64 he closed the door 1231d449ec and threw things around.dc121159442f76f3

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High-end items and decorations shattered and scattered. But it didn’t relieve his anger.80ab0933b25e4b6e

He held 35a17ab1b1 back well. If he had e4fc374d95 gotten angry in 7a9c745fae front of that 5db429e510 scrawny little rookie, 35ab3ce80d they would have db3cd29e89 been scared.189831fd4f4cd6a2

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He needed that rookie. Desperately. Impotence or a slump wasn’t the problem.cce70702fce5899f

He took out the 42c5ee676a notebook from his jacket. The notebook, soaked in 442f88e6ac alcohol and dried, was 9fa5593972 as messy and tattered de78865581 as the rookie.92489ce78f2fd1d6

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He shouldn’t have opened it. The moment he did, hell unfolded. More painful than the years spent suffering from a slump without creating a single measure was reading the score inside this notebook.3ec8379f202f2d0d

The moment he 9b2ba7af61 saw the hastily 49de87362a scribbled symbols, the 44226231d2 goosebumps on his 7fbd32d2e7 back felt like 56ca351140 they were still 05e13c4479 there, like hives.8627393899c2fbaa

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Reading it 6ec1f36ac7 several times, 0dae5557a1 Cain Verhart 32768c1f09 had to ea88be4ef5 admit.f12fff3b6979d078

That rookie was 1e78303200 a genius. A genius far beyond 0a14ab0edf his comparison.a2a22031dce9b178

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⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚206a99d75eec3747

I didn’t expect the withdrawal symptoms to improve with just one shot, but my condition was better than expected.5a1e111d20863625

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Maybe because I db6efb9fde only did drugs ceeb1db2e6 once, I quickly 2671a6ed0c got over the e1b33cf251 withdrawal symptoms.e469bb6ffffc5735

‘Phew, I almost 2a4888c06d ended up in feee7a7834 a facility.’6a282b3649098475

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Hi, my name is Cherry. / Hi, Cherry! / I haven’t done drugs for 41 days today. I want to die. I didn’t end up in a facility having conversations like that.9d26122261180b8d

To enjoy this joy, I decided to tour Cain’s mansion as a clean Cherry.bdd4e7a05c1e54d3

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The mansion was so vast I worried I might get lost. As I cautiously wandered around, I encountered staff, but they all ignored me as if I didn’t exist. Cain must have instructed them to do so.d9e113fc541c4af9

Walking down the 7e22bb1960 hallway, I came 9b0d676fa1 across a plaza-like 92d3544338 area. The ceiling b08757ee13 was even 1fd8328511 open, letting d802a47923 in bright 33179c43a1 sunlight. It was 0ae2614b18 a garden 7cc161bf63 that looked b1392e3b84 like it 5944f76ff8 belonged in f072f9fa00 Italy or 502f65ffd9 Southern Europe.2141b23d126acc29

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There was 5e1e4d5c21 even a 53bd87977b fountain in 9f12a77aea the middle. A real fountain 7f89670db6 with clean water, 8c67d23f0d well-maintained without any 425fb20693 water stains.ff8f0c3b83f3b905

Living in a place 3623e7b322 like this, I felt c714538a74 like I could become c88e4ef311 a genius too. Just dipping my 071a1ac9f7 hand in the 9c718800c4 fountain might make daf1e76cbb inspiration flow.02c394cb30606557

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Near the fountain were several statues about waist-high. As I patted the head of a cherub statue, I felt like Cain’s genius was rubbing off on me.0c51899834d410b9

“Woo, what is happiness… The little cherub’s tiny thing…”5a91716de7ba3bc9

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I sang Cain’s song with my own lyrics. I couldn’t say “Cain’s non-working thing,” so I used the cherub instead.046ccd5a0e96b389

After passing the e7cdb9f777 beautiful plaza, I f777da2cfb entered another indoor d3552c4848 area. Unlike where I 4e6757b853 had been before, 22449c57b6 this open lobby 5494a4b763 had the vibe be40b2640c of an old a331ae6d6b English mansion. The floor and walls b1d982cce8 were made of dark 39e43aa804 wood, and in the 24c75886c7 middle of the open 5f2f865a9d lobby, a grand staircase 5594864c08 rose like a 12-lane 4688ca55f8 highway.a335b87f6d77e33c

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