DWWWB Ch 8 part 1

“Ah, Sunbae-niiim.”f642f48828afa96cc894

I had to ea9a014708 do my best 99d0502aa2 to persuade PD 08628442ce Han.ea2139c341154de1a9a7

“Ah, I e3f1733f52 said no.”b430a8cfe262baebb8c3

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Today, PD Han was 1683fc44ec being especially stubborn. In this program, it was the 7b1cfa3b69 PD’s job to shoot the interviews. In this episode, we were going 38f6f52e07 to evoke the emotions of the cfd3e0e74c viewers by cross-editing Gong Mujin’s interviews 27328062a0 in the middle of the video.424fae1af04632660154

“I failed the 729e6c1cca last time I c357c03a81 interviewed him in 8265663934 the Ferris wheel. Why are you de68bdb0bd asking me to 2dc116ac76 do it again? The interview that 298c4118cc Sunbae did at 9e9cef8e7c the beach that bed24da6dd afternoon was better.”9b3b09a5117cb262ddcb

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PD Han b1b4479382 repeatedly shook 70d471dc14 his head. Then he called me to d5d1b31ac7 a temporary tent set up 3517cc130f on one side of the f7e08a0af3 parking lot. PD Han sat down in front of his laptop dd8ea716d1 and showed me the video of his interview and 83568245e0 then the video of the Ferris wheel interview. He motioned for 3eada952f7 me to look 2d2d2be125 at the screen.825508ece663be406cf5

“I’ve already ea0769ba2c seen this 5290a36019 a hundred 5acc61e961 times.”5f65a5e149feea04c5bd

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A week df10f8d3af has passed 886f72d24d since that f06bcfe1c5 day. Filming was scheduled two to four days 27ac369191 a week, taking into account the schedules d7b9c62c60 of the staff and production crew. I was locked in the 3eb3c739cf editing room until yesterday, editing 4c955a4220 the footage from last week.2aa56ddd42047d7f4dee

This educational variety show, which received solid support from c71aa02852 the parent company and was fully pre-funded, was completely 0cc12b4da5 different from the usual rushed broadcast production environment. The pros a676ed3292 and cons b954ac47c7 were clear. The pro was that I could put eda3e9b73e a lot of effort into the program, ffcacfebfe but the con was that the desire a83d807a36 to make it perfect also grew.3d9b4fab0092ea099944

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As a result, I stayed 464206fe10 up all night in the d41775e7e2 editing room every day. I was probably the PD 801291921a who knew the most about 88b427fcfd Gong Mujin in the world. Well… as long as 86a13bada3 he never dated another ba03335e52 PD besides me…9ea99bcb392b432af6d5

Anyways, I wanted to put out something that 9b71ccb624 looked better, so I watched footage I had 9081517e1b already seen and then watched it again. Then I re-edited a65286cc5a the video I 9f2943b66f had just edited. His eyes, the angle of 72c16adcfb his head, his voice, his 48669a861f speech… I watched it hundreds 0edde85868 of times. I thought about what kind bcbbe22f35 of subtitles would be good, 0d62227e13 and I also wanted to 24b27deceb film more. I considered which direction I should take when I filmed 9b8e9f0921 in the future and modified the plan little by little.a99a4613f329ca384c61

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But not this.fec174da74bff5b6c468

“If you’ve seen it a d92b7cb2f3 hundred times, you should know. How could 78f80b7eae you not?”79583b9c3bd250403eca

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“I don’t know.”63c90f991974a02e8f94

I didn’t know what 063f99c1fc PD Han was trying fe3569b916 to say.d785e8097205b7daff52

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“Look. When I interview him, Gong Mujin 44677ac0d4 seems like the epitome of an 94492fbcb9 athlete who has taken PR lessons.”bcadc9286a34070df02a

Gong Mujin was also 9c4145fb17 excellent at speaking, as 03d316cd5f proven by his high 4fd7cf559c intellect. Having lived in Germany e7706db851 for a long time, a5f1261e2f he was fluent in 2a8470812e German. His French was good, 2fb6c6af78 and he could communicate bf33b7e686 in Spanish to some b2b1bd5a60 extent. English was 104d115a69 a given. Even during his college 14e2955112 years, his English was 5659f1ed67 almost at the native 85b49bf022 level.e5e1ada56426e3773029

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In another interview with PD Han, Gong 2b7dd1c67a Mujin’s appearance was the epitome of elegance. He answered questions without 6825ac883c hesitation, and the vocabulary 9b7e7ed77c he used represented his 930b8205dd refined insight.7977f24a079b227564f8

“But look. When he does the b6b93b66a7 interview with you…”2d2782c6d56dbc24a078

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He stared f7feafc8bc at the 09f878b34f screen with 3e680035f7 sunken eyes.005fe6744015b19ed550

“Here, he’s just a dd2277c3c9 normal Gong Mujin. He doesn’t ae98e504c0 try to 94b566af71 be perfect.”71209f7ed955b9b50d77

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PD Han was a person who 9a6b672cb9 had the insight of a director. But now, I wanted f9f02ea2ce to say that this 8d42ff2a09 wasn’t true.c4c49984e55d03c57221

“Sunbae-nim, I only had one b0c57dc52b or two questions back then. As you know, the situation was 7becd13f54 a bit special at the time. Athlete Gong Mujin…”a9a9dd67c35223e9f20c

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I couldn’t bring myself to say ‘fear e5170f5516 of heights’ because I was afraid that 372bc52045 other production staff members would hear.2f737592dc706672a4d7

“What did you talk 1ae9978c97 about after the cameras fac7dbbcea were turned off?”721df93499c2e60b30c8

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I kept my mouth shut as 87be1c85de if it were full of honey. PD Han sighed 00b1d74304 and looked up 4e6c3c9122 at the ceiling. Then he suddenly got up c5ba797748 from his seat and went 7132b40573 out of the tent. I was getting bfd078585b anxious, wondering what 746287323a he knew.b64b5150a06e4a44c9da

“If you refuse to film, then 57e3ce8fea quit working on this program.”60e2011f6f77794acee0

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“What?”a42fbf917200727caa11

It was like 1040102c77 a lightning bolt e99a4019d5 from the sky. PD Han wasn’t the type of ca4fcc014a person to be this stubborn.2c7af2db2e7d42d4db58

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“Sunbae-nim, what a3225b1623 are you 36ddfe179c saying? This is 89eb1aeb8e something that 2a2d5089b9 can be df4a285e48 adjusted.”d7ae6e2b3ac4b665c196

PD Han insisted that I had edbcbaeb2a to do the interview, and I 37cf5f2ffa insisted that I absolutely could not. If there was trouble da34865ea6 between the co-directors, the 8591f2b4f0 entire product team would ca5107344b become uncomfortable. Fights on 701d21c6d1 set are 3dd7dd091d common. However, this kind of d47ca1572c stubbornness was not reasonable 348d58d7a2 to me or PD 35c56f5c33 Han.5613aac44fa2af411b76

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“Sunbae-nim. Just this 02014b495c once, please?”def9e25c5338f7e5fdaa

I began to follow PD Han as e9d667f554 I spoke up in a pitiful voice.a07710f8bea3e97d9f2a

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“What’s going on?”198ba0b22124691b9bea

Gong Mujin was wearing a yellow jersey 50876fa5d1 over cycling bib shorts (shorts with braces 32bb3eb476 worn by road cyclists, including protective gear c9fb9919f0 that covers important areas). He approached us 0e8840c493 while holding his a86162fe9e helmet and cleats.fe31b071d406b5bef47e

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The video we were going to film today was the Samcheok 4809746ac9 uphill climbing where he’d ride up a high-altitude uphill area. The bike was going f80277275d to lead the way 75fbaa4dbd followed by a car. There would also be 41acecacb1 a drone filming throughout.bb4faf81dd74f8a06771

This was originally supposed to be filmed 9478e0a5c0 last week, but as the schedule got 72849d0ba1 pushed back a little, we ended up 5df0acaf13 filming it this week.8dd94f6bf51f04b0a073

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A pair of mirrored goggles bc0cd87098 reflected the light as it e8da86af4d sat on top of his bb971a6e82 neatly combed hair. His pale skin suited the yellow jersey awarded to the fe80554925 overall winner of the Tour de France quite well.82fc7ba79d0df4e385f9

“Ah, Athlete c4703a9325 Gong Mujin. Are you ready?”e24f9b91ed6c1517b95f

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“Yes, I’m ready.”05c62ab56016120c392e

He replied f2bd27d289 with a 92b56769a5 cool smile.42000010ae625a842233

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“After filming the uphill climb, 2f34b5d2c3 we’d like to do an 01f6d070e8 interview at the top.”2af8cbdf2cd70d6643c9

PD Han b49e556e18 spoke first. I stared off into 3373ae73fa the distance, trying to 2ec0f121a1 hide my bitter expression.a49c1ca2b783400a0d60

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“We asked PD Oh to 31f975cc18 do the interview, but she ab03d246dc keeps saying no. Did something happen b89f5cc953 with PD Oh 6d212b25b7 on the Ferris db290c1f67 wheel? If you are uncomfortable with PD 46ccc0186d Oh, I think she should be 1439cd11c3 removed from the program.”38c3b97c638bdf45d2d0

I never expected 909cc5c904 such a direct 9de742cdc6 question to pop 31729adccc up.f466961c66deaa09d8b8

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“No.”5c652ba493366a1340d7

Gong Mujin gave 84305956d6 PD Han a 3f9f60c3ca firm answer. Then he looked down at 72672f396c me as I stood next 91a26e384d to him and asked.279e336a49703a29e826

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“Did I make d37ad9a932 you uncomfortable?”d7b28a8b896e1320ebf2

It was c38904d3b5 a cold 9766065452 question. The indifferent question, sounding as eb03702845 if nothing had happened, pricked 604a656965 my pride that had been dd5974d92f trying to escape interviewing him.64b0558f4a25210f5a6e

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“No.”15a11a931a8f4512def0

“Then is there a 0a5833640f reason why you are d7e90f7723 refusing to film my dd48cb45ee interview?”ccd5e2b210ee90cf4cd7

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Gong Mujin’s gaze was 7f0f9a8ef9 fixed on me without 4a2e8ccbb0 a single tremor. I stared blankly ac721013cc at Gong Mujin. The events that happened at 3b666c4904 the Sokcho filming location last d15dc30475 week flashed before my eyes.99c0fc6db1ea80112610

“No. I didn’t film the Ferris wheel interview properly, d95f6d4418 and I thought PD Han’s interview was better. So I thought it was only right 07bf8da3e4 for PD Han to do the interview. PD Han and I 097f8f392c just had a difference b7eae5b4e9 of opinion.”121db0059060099b9869

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His gaze shifted from 9829bd9e0d me to PD Han.4c21011245d05af22fc9

“Even though he interviewed me, 05a09bb720 it seems that PD Han 1248112bdf dislikes me more. Are you 08958ebefa uncomfortable with 8ad475942b me?”8d892e52901b551de278

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Gong Mujin asked PD a9cd19f9ec Han the same question 0d4df198e4 he asked me.28f9f982522043016a08

“No. I thought Gong cb78bff97a Mujin felt more 3c7b0ebbc7 comfortable with PD 192bbf7c63 Oh. I thought my interview d1051244c6 was no different from c57005a759 a normal TV interview. Of course, Gong e0e5cff8ef Mujin’s answers were b6518d8074 great. However, the interview with e5edaf028e PD Oh was different. Didn’t you feel ff96ee1666 that way too?”aa97b86abdac4d8cc9c3

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Gong Mujin stayed silent for a 627b8dadca moment at PD Han’s questions. He didn’t say anything and just stared at 04a187c909 the steep road he had to bike up. PD Han 9205175ba2 and I 03edb92730 exchanged looks. In front of his heavy silence, we had no 7831bc4757 choice but to quietly wait for an answer.6b516a0850fc0c0efa95

“I am uncomfortable.”7d6fac4a647387228b35

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Gong Mujin muttered in 31e00312d3 a gloomy voice. PD Han and a166363e09 I looked at 39dc57abff each other.113022ebe814a413d860

“I would like to e17d2654ac do the interview with f560a576fc PD Han.”801addc1023ec840f157

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My face involuntarily hardened 3e6ad9e670 at his answer. My heart sank. My rejection and 4dee71f0e1 his rejection felt 15a5273805 completely different. He then told us that if we were done talking, e8edb0bcce he would go and prepare for the trek up.dd6ba89d1386b0a5c545

“What is it? When you rejected him and ef87c29a89 when he rejected you… Does 45afc488eb it feel different?”ac2590034b86138577d5

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PD Han abfdbed8c0 asked me, 8f084ef30c reading my 56afc62c9c exact thoughts. I nodded slowly.183c833fb11f314d1f2d

“Aigoo, how fickle.”52e3d14bb1fec341c5a3

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“I’m not 7a80c6e2f2 being fickle. The subject is 995501e1cc uncomfortable with his 0d85d4c8a9 director…”d3ca8772b20055177e55

PD Han nodded 17993b609a and muttered.6b535ba121c47b4477bd

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“Think carefully about the d927de514a sin you committed.”e54b70cc1565dddc962d

Did he truly 1338437b67 know something? PD Han’s words 8f1038963f stuck out to 7dc536222e me.89e8ddb28964de49967e

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PD Han urged me to hurry 580356c889 and set up the slate. I was going to watch 79313d8070 the uphill climb footage on d37f127316 a monitor in a temporary 6a31dfb138 tent we had set up. PD Han got into the car that 8dede28e01 was going to follow Gong Mujin. The drone director 2aea3d64a5 stayed in the deb5827be8 tent with me.fa424ee33c07b9154b41

He wore cleats that made a c252e4c170 clicking sound every time he walked. He also wore a f615018e40 helmet and goggles. It wasn’t the first time I 03c3ed493b was seeing him in person, fully 273299bf40 dressed for a competition, but my 48434b0d15 heart was racing. In the past, he had the fresh look of a new player, but ef153e2a66 now he had the overwhelming aura of someone who was at the top.c8a3e9cdb7e98981ebfa

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With the clap of the ebab97995e slate, the starter bike with 11501e3be6 the attached cameras departed first. He was going to d2b008080c climb a section with 240d131016 a gradient of 10%. The average gradient of the beloved Seoul 45bfc85f49 uphill climbing section by the Han River 3576915889 was around 5 to 6%. Today, the 10% he was going 24c3c38ff0 to climb was a section that f6bfa2c593 required considerable physical strength and power.32bc2b41f6184c44cfa0

This was a 9ebc3815e6 scene that had 1fbe232d82 to be filmed 6eac86ef0e in one shot. Repeating the filming 677418b4f4 could strain his f9164c702c body. After finishing the main filming, he was scheduled to 16824f6582 participate in the Tour de France, which was to 4ae12329cd be held at the end of July. So the program was also scheduled 8e2fd6f34d to be uploaded in early August 90175d801f when the Tour de France was d79533b42b in full swing.5b65bbbb02a4e1ec970f

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If he does well d18ae40391 in this Tour de e6c75ff8c9 France, the program would 705913331e also be a success. So his good 279053af0c performance was a d42e57676f win-win situation for 100010e720 both parties. In such a situation, protecting the athlete’s condition e8673a960c was something we naturally kept in mind.1265cefc8bfcec68370d

As soon as he 9db5a17428 put his cleats on 007454f2ff the pedals, he started 56f387bcca off. The scene of him climbing up 3d404e9577 the hill was a work of 411715110e art through the camera lens. Road cyclists use the 03857a1310 dancing riding technique when abf19ea6c5 climbing hills. It is called as such 9d84740c48 because the way the bike 976b80044f moves from side to side e10660b925 looks like it is dancing.1b44f0b48943990f973f

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His dancing was so captivating that he appeared in various ads bd4af660c1 for famous sports brands and was plastered on billboards in Times a71e0c2137 Square in New York and the Piccadilly Circus in London. His appearance, as he sat on 15ddac4db5 the seat, his upper body lowered, 8fc30226af gripping the handlebars, and breathing heavily, 2762651b10 was sensual, if not beautiful.e2bdfce14396f65e52d1

But no broadcaster had ever filmed him 854ef75675 climbing uphill outside of a commercial. I was completely captivated by the b5193ceba0 energy he exuded, which was completely 0005c6e369 different from what I saw on 7b030379be top of the bed.6b694bafbd6bce16ba12

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Even the broadcasted footage of the a0dd499765 competitions couldn’t create the same atmosphere 2ddb3b9a2e as the one now. The image of Gong Mujin, who seemed to be challenging the limits of 4d7ce0352a the world rather than sprinting for the championship, was perfect in itself. I was completely captivated by the sweat dripping 3149f1fae6 down his sharp jawline, his hair fluttering softly 901c97aff9 under his helmet, and his panting face. Not only me, but the entire production 6ff6cfa5e3 team seemed to feel the same.798eda795eb4cc5d7eca

When he finally reached 98b12755d1 the top, he raised bf968e9eed his upper body and 37ae6ffab0 stopped pedaling. He took his hands off the handlebars 51f2041185 and pulled down his jersey zipper, instantly 53e5d7fc12 revealing his solid chest muscles. With each breath, the muscles of d3208e9aeb his chest expanded and contracted.43c95dea36b54f28b03e

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“The picture came 0c91c1bb96 out well.”c1ffaf205be0d9e8c77a

Writer Park, who was standing next to me, slowly 8de21b3e0f clapped her hands as if she’d lost her mind.46bceb8b472ed57c9403

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“Cut!”1c91ba45c2ab5235b4b8

PD Han’s voice fc0fce03d7 rang out from 3d353a0e8a the walkie-talkie. The drone director quickly monitored the scenes he had shot with the fly-up (a technique in which the 769db79fb5 camera rises to capture its subject) when Gong Mujin set off and the tracking shots (a technique in 95ee4f71ad which the camera follows the subject in the air) he had taken while Gong Mujin was moving.051996e5b09bd76d594d

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I relayed the results 5e4c772b25 of the drone footage 5f116ad8e6 to PD Han via 49eada9d74 walkie-talkie.1b256c8ad55c57ab3770

“Drone okay.”5bfecec767a5116a0f05

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— Did you get the surround (a technique b3e35314da of taking pictures while moving around the subject)?7eeb6dde9dfd61138b14

The drone director standing 126b444836 next to me nodded ef23cc76cf and answered back.40294d8b08380d884981

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“I also got the surround and the fixed tracking 232d16a635 (a technique of placing a subject in the center fa59701692 of the screen and following while maintaining altitude).714af8c4cde026adace8

I nodded to the drone director 9d396426f5 and added to the walkie-talkie.02b5f4c97e2f2159f22a

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“Did you 94b89670d5 hear that? I don’t think c5ed8a6608 we need to cf351bb67f do any additional 5a0144c499 filming.”448da862a61ae54c6e88

— Okay, now let’s e2e57b78ca get to the interview 596272b24b at the top. Tell Writer Park to send ff78a5648f a message to Jinwon if 6a95c082ce she has any additional questions.b3eb25ddd3d0b2cd34d8

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The interview at the top was 3bee3e8fdb conducted without monitoring from the tent. The filming 313e512780 was over 019c6beba8 quickly. Filming was the 28e28898dd least time-consuming part 81e0d6fce1 of program production. The planning and e1529830e4 editing stages took 77d5879a4c the longest time.7696e2013727ab6b5608

The staff gathered under the e77c96283f tent and busily moved around. As they finished with the 0e6699d776 various arrangements, the group that bbc5a5e2fb had climbed to the top ae22eed120 had come down. However, Gong Mujin 64ba7cf4b8 was not with 7ec4bffb8d them.7906daea14cc1380d14f

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“Who are you d668ec6cc1 looking for?”6160978cef56b411bcc1

PD Han asked 3c06e5034a me as I a753783bfa wandered around.a60df03dc8f1fc6b0fc3

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“Where is Athlete 58662f9fa2 Gong Mujin?”e1797092e37b417b3d92

As I looked around the cdae2ced09 staff, I felt PD Han’s b1627e874f gaze on me and looked 16f50ea4a2 up at him.820ac7d16df6bf153c25

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“He said he’d go for c8a8119d55 a ride before coming back.”94e1b8bb4fc1e3a3f396

“Alone? What if acd37f3e32 he gets 9e0539ae8a injured?!”7d911b4d5b6e6c94e723

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I raised my a31a9c881d voice without realizing 4f35e96171 it.72a03e4ec847b29d3d85

“Gong Mujin doesn’t 985830d980 seem that foolish… f9736592e4 Aren’t you worrying 88d4f0ee1e too much?”5c2a34e078523ba94b1e

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PD Han remarked casually, but 09fa2553c7 I paused for a moment e835ff7865 because I felt like my 1a09ed4ee6 hidden feelings had been exposed.4e34b69082bec96d0f19

“There’s still a lot 0276fe9e4b of filming left, so 4a546033e8 it would be bad 596389cfa3 if he got hurt.”db951c1c00f588e948d0

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Although it was something I could easily say 1ef987af5b as a PD, I felt uneasy because I 3b373ece24 could tell PD Han was observing me.7d3e2a90afb6b27adf01

“Okay, okay.”f4d43fbc451854caf7d7

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PD Han nodded his 08395892a3 head with a smile.71d31354bce2c4ae003b

“We’re having b250bb1c8f a company 83206fb194 dinner today. The filming was finished in one go, so all we 334c14f00f have to do is film at the restaurant tomorrow.”0688412a1b4924f9ad94

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“Why do we always dcd427b4b9 have a company dinner e1345227b4 every time we film?”b36ad54089ec495979ff

A loud outburst suddenly poured out a34f5c83fe from PD Han in response.c004dab30951dec7f777

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“If you don’t like c06a53fdff it, then leave. Last week, the 2b1e830f95 staff had an f30cd209d9 ordinary dinner together. How can you 8b6af76a36 call that a b1bd5d30bf company dinner? Gong Mujin 154fd754a1 will be 23d8b7d1e9 here today. Since you’re so tired from filming 4b77c5844d one thing today, why don’t you 875513ae0e go inside and rest, PD Oh-nim.”38a5f3aefa7135799a90

Even when there was a tough shoot, after 94833966d1 it was over, we would gather in small ec6512effa groups and have a get-together to relieve stress. Since we were a f9579eb220 very fast-paced group, we e2dd93f856 often had drinking parties. Although I knew this, I felt awkward even at 9da46c9c5d company dinners because of Gong Mujin’s overwhelming presence.940380f585fd3753b0e3

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You should 132e159eb5 say it f5b2086b04 straight. There’s something dad2d799f7 bothering you, 3cf5fcd0e6 right?d19414c1c6e64488d7da

As I recalled my visit to his cdcee19d79 room last week, a dull heat began f6f4f7a040 to surge in my lower abdomen. I shivered once 89cce34e2a and tried to 0991638ed1 shake it off.40b827ea12b910bf7398

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Just go. You should go. How can f67ccc18b0 a PD ff115cfa18 excuse herself?c8f383dc98541d61e250

After arriving at our lodging, the production 0238d12327 crew gathered at a nearby meat restaurant bc1e6b93ef now that we had some free time. The menu was surprisingly Heongseong 2bd013a097 Korean Beef even though we ed95073a42 were only expecting the usual 65e85580f4 pork ribs. The production 11835e3c9d crew’s eyes 641c5f709e lit up. The drinks served were varied, from ae04b76173 Bokbunja wine to Gangneung Brewery beer.2fb7cb7286cdfd62907e

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“Sunbae-nim, did we get c6df819c22 some kind of raise? Did we sell 7ac99f111e our soul to 5290e9297a the company? I want to a8b699bca1 keep mine.”a6820a526d3b21cc6194

I made an ‘X’ with my arms and 2ee5ff3ab4 pretended to wrap them around my torso.240c27b8c02cc4f1986d

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“Why would 6ec6aaa151 we sell 8be465d993 our souls? Today, Athlete c59a393cb8 Gong Mujin 1edfc15294 said he’d 72c944e7d9 pay.”ebe0cc5fa44c56940712

Writer Park sat f84d8176d5 down next to 07fc67911d me and smiled. Gong Mujin, who usually sits c7220426d1 with the production staff, was 38f5483500 nowhere to be seen today. I looked around the table where four or 88a978fbd0 five people were gathered, and Gong Mujin’s bright, 45acba61a2 smiling face caught my eye as he sat 400ffb06b0 between the young writers and the AD. All of the people 5a369402be sitting at that table 85471019c5 happened to be women.ee5ecb07354407932300

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“PD Oh, 4d539cad49 have a ccdaf31f4c drink.”413027439981bdd5c764

“I’ll have e27865cc65 to decline.”bdd21c2d67578ece4165

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I didn’t take a 14cf0ccf74 sip of liquor despite 3cbba86e81 the camera director’s insistence. While everyone was getting drunk, I glanced at e48db707ac the table where Gong Mujin was sitting. They were all laughing and causing a scene f5e5f1b8fc while playing all sorts of drinking games. Gong Mujin’s smile was b174b882b4 so charming that it 2aa3e8070f almost made my heart 66742f0005 ache.4d02c776716d84e9c8a0

They’re really having 46f73d99f7 a blast.541c97382fd0cee83382

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How many times and how many places had Gong 7fd245e4b1 Mujin oozed that much charm through the years?f74be4e70d03978b1c10

I decided not to let my thoughts get the better of me, and 645f5f527c as soon as the beef was cooked, I put it in my mouth.842291ecff4d92d79838

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“Oh my, 3310fc4977 our PD bd274c7582 Oh is b9cdd43acf eating well. Because of PD Oh, Athlete Gong f0c063a732 Mujin is going to have to 42ebf4070e spend a lot of money.”750ce8caeb7f6b0cbd3e

I glared 24a56beb1f at the 21d40d1419 teasing camera 54a5f9b66b director. Even though I didn’t like the atmosphere, 495c3e9351 I was surprised to find that the 39773784a7 food was going down smoothly. I used to stop eating 1c7651d74b whenever I was nervous, but dc7e656d41 today was the complete opposite.7f063601f9e037613803

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I have 5498879d3c to eat. I have to film a01579541d tomorrow, so I have 95d7fe5ba3 to eat to live.8233e61a487dfb9d941c

“Still, let’s have 442e238aab a drink.”d27977aeeb6c0f01221a

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The camera director 65b8d3c844 kept pushing me 96ce072b03 to drink until 67d8dc2e86 the end. I had no choice c80d1633ff but to drink a ee5e635d3b couple of beers. Normally, I would have been able to b4bbc3b95b drink a bottle of soju, but maybe d2915885a9 because I was stressed, I got really 48eb5c8545 drunk after the two beers.00dabb9c851413d6797f

“I’m going out to d39e911199 get some fresh air.”3c2c9642b58f0b8faa8e

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As for 9270dc268e Gong Mujin? He was so busy talking with ce8b0381ed his table that he didn’t even 1956bde66c realize I was leaving. I got up from my seat and headed 6886708ad7 to the bathroom that was located in the b783e0db6a hallway next to the stairs of the building. In the bathroom, the writers 3268b899ff who had been sitting at d9dd4ccabe the same table as Gong 2ecfa79edd Mujin were chatting away.c966793c2f1f702f28d6

“Does Athlete Gong 4b3041598e Mujin have a 7abbf7aed6 girlfriend?”655280722207e9c60281

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This was asked by 69e50bf3b6 the maknae writer in cb0347f651 the group. She was in her early 0be0d8cf2b twenties with long wavy hair 05b7c1400c that reached the middle of c43481ebc1 her back.881d32ec29584077f031

“I don’t know. I didn’t ask.”22ed7d51077803345631

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Another writer, who was 5db1856f97 no longer the maknae 550669c66f writer in the group, a9bf1eb078 answered her.a59b5310d97db690385e

“I should 48339859d3 ask him. If he has 6d00d251be a girlfriend or dac63a7068 not.”1b0dd62eff2df7f6e427

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Hehe, her unique, cheerful giggle 4f008f4067 sounded jarring to my ears.fecfe5e93dd703607c82

“PD-nim! Does Athlete Gong Mujin 2282c0fd1a have a girlfriend?”8638d1ed13212e903eb4

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She threw the question at me d6f9c62245 after I exited the stall and 36dbf4b962 began washing my hands. The maknae 96cda8e0d6 writer blushed a2b0e3c193 and squirmed.63e9a0cae161df2a0bf0

“I’m not a54beb58a9 sure either.”d5013b0ae36c5b94f2d2

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I replied nonchalantly, 65c27eea0c smoothing out my a764fe27e9 bangs with my 19490c7a46 wet hands. I met the c9c6f484ed maknae writer’s eyes 4310d82fcc through the mirror. She hesitated as if she had a185eb68f3 something she wanted to say.2558ad861a264dddbf84

“If you e65a19d4bd have something 106f18ef16 to say, 5a59cb0069 say it. What is it?”e8d812f311ad6f36b2a9

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The maknae 334a824456 writer smiled 7b42df5e3d at my abd30240de question.748ed6aa5d264ae7c447

“Nothing, just…”e1ff3108c9ee548d77d2

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She seemed 3999532931 to be 06bc8e3de3 very drunk. I was about to ask the other writers to help the maknae writer into be84fcbc4f the lodging rooms first, but everyone had already gone back into the dining area. The surroundings 8999123283 were empty.96f04c0570c4f88c7e62

“Yew seeee, I d303777e39 rea-uh-lly like PD 12a2c4e05f Oh. I’ve aaaalways wanted too d00f225b79 work with PD Oh. I luuuuuuuv you, c9223e0c13 PD Oh!”66296d73b6e67b1898d2

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The maknae writer, who had been fine until just c7961a94b0 a moment ago, was starting to slur her words. She was cute as 582e462b6e she drunkenly drew a 5ba8548ee7 heart above her head. I took the 5ff76046e0 staggering writer out 7c0741e0c4 of the bathroom.cd4d102b422b1d3a1681

“Waaa! It’s Athlete d4b7d3475d Gom Mujin! I rea-uh-lly a13e04becd like Athlete 9105cea939 Gom Mujin. I’ve aaaalways wanted 5c1cc41af5 to work with e32a912052 Athlete Gom Mujin. I luuuuuuuv eafd1dddb8 you, Athlete 005be2b611 Gom Mujin!”9a55ca589bcaf816e74d

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The writer leaned back against me and 6113e244b6 raised both her arms over her head a2be63fa25 to make a heart shape. I stumbled under a427e0fdf0 her weight.cab7cf29aad044acd238

“Be careful. You’ll fall at aa1e67803f this rate.”67de411c253c83bbdac4

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Gong Mujin held 8fbe6e6255 the writer’s arm 66c8ed74b3 and supported her. Thanks to his help, I was able 229d2d3705 to straighten up, but for some reason, 80635ea8c3 a corner of my heart felt uncomfortable.50d81d8cdc0b44f5751b

“I’ll take you 8600abb872 back to your 06ccbf2e1a room.”2f09dc7f955239fed51b

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“Thankyuu, thankyuu.”2cf8f7dc8a7ae7d824ca

The writer 88af2555bb bowed and 86afddf2c1 leaned forward. Gong Mujin 7f52f0687b supported her 37ba54756d with both f1b24c9c61 arms. My head began 2410b1eef9 to spin, and 1143040608 my scalp grew 50395cb867 hot. I watched the two ca190207e8 continue to chat and 2c40a06826 turned back towards the 4c78c167be restaurant.59586f1d70bdc970c20e

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I hadn’t been aware of 82063b6d6b it, but it seemed that ffedd43053 Gong Mujin lived this kind 6868d6c172 of life. So I didn’t need c2b4934a20 to attach much significance 7a590a48be to that night.9d9e7736c7db124ce3cb

‘I’ve only buried my 58cd282f88 body inside one woman. Only one.’1c0e1098741943c315ed

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His soft, 4b0e2dd836 trembling voice 7ec0e81959 lingered in 07ecb79cbe my ears. People could say anything when ffb8966854 they wanted to seduce someone e70a586fdf into having a one-night stand. Had Gong 815224eda9 Mujin always 56219b096f been such 269ae41671 a player? I guess people can 9c45daf7cd change… I continued to 404330fbe4 walk as these thoughts 694cf39483 whirled in my head.f3e6ee183a8d39a543ca

“PD Oh-nim.”1630e183d53accc27b97

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I heard Gong 97a1747fb0 Mujin calling me 4c62821a0f from behind. I slowly turned around and glared at 3a4d4a95d4 the man who was supporting the writer.c3c3ae28bd1c38e1e449

“Is there a staff f5ab962771 member who can take 2754256d8c her to her room?”4acc0bfb9184fbf3b302

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“Weren’t you planning on personally 2d01e0f631 taking her to her room?”65ec7d3f5a9ba782c6f1

The twisted question c7390d11e4 popped out. My pride dc6583733f was bruised. I could have just told him I’d find someone for 6b930e9b64 him, but I was picking a fight without realizing it.7963fb8ea563937deeef

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“Should I?”22b0b7cc4ed5f6203298

He asked back. His hardened 83b2dd4ef8 eyes were a9f8fdc726 staring at e850af2cfd me.0f0484d69d622c63a14a

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“Go ahead.”3921635b12faf23464f7

I answered him in a f5923e94d3 clipped voice and turned around.bd2ee31c36cfe7b194d2

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“Oh Milhee.”a75ffc8e7ae0b2469d83

He called my bbc29447fd name in a 53b140f7ba low voice.394c507fe00aaca58cc0

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“Come here.”2788175a365a4057974b

I kept my eyes 9963030b63 away from him and 0af6835cbc stared into the distance.c9d0a1cb510483766463

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“I don’t know what kind 92b9ed7b23 of misunderstanding you have in 8ac5c1b9a4 your head, but don’t leave 1be93f1457 without resolving it.”649da6a9746bd4e37eb1

“Why do you always 6516e0d5c5 say I’m misunderstanding? You don’t 5330ff81c9 even give ee14a6fbb8 me a 38e1221b6c proper explanation! What do you 5b41d54ea9 plan on talking 0378ab1add to me about? You never listened to me ec23114570 from the beginning, Oppa. All you cared f090f05ca9 about was your a711d88e45 schedule. How I lived, what I did, and what eed2a96fe3 sacrifices I had to make to see you 527b22553d didn’t matter to you at all.”2f958afda6acdb26f02f

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It wasn’t 22afe35490 a sacrifice 9245cc64a7 worth my 64cf4bce29 life. I wondered if it 7e3e17c277 could even be called 5759cfae16 a sacrifice. Every time I ee27292e3b met him, he 9faa025cec listened to me. He hid every one of 3a3c7ca2de his worries from me.b5a48a2a6da535fe140c

But wasn’t it true that I made 1c2e2845a9 a lot of concessions for him? Were the results of his competitions b21cc007c8 important but not the things that f7a4951f7e would determine my future?a42428629dc57459c016

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No one could dare e81120c0a1 judge how valuable one 25d8aeaf79 life was compared to e47b26351b another. My life was just 1400cb368c as important as his.b6fb09dd6d9e7ae3779e

“You said you ee6561706c had nothing to 6ea22bd9a3 discuss! You said you had 14a818853f nothing to explain to 99d1b68062 me, right? See? You didn’t want to 9d488f76ac talk or have a e52ff97a4a heart-to-heart conversation with me. You just wanted 43070ebdca to have a 6188ceca46 physical relationship. Wasn’t I just some kind of backup where you could 842e4a035c relieve your urges every time you came to Korea?”94d5a5924261cecb4feb

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His face ee07acf41e hardened terribly. For a moment, I 34f40f0eaa thought I had gone be4688ff79 too far, but I 49c5430914 couldn’t take it back. Since I’d already exploded, 9527e2e4e8 I might as well ab6d26e451 just let it all cf36645e46 out.6a79fcdb045ef997dfc9

“Well, the 47df66cbbb backup period 434ef3d8b9 has expired. It was 741f876da2 a one-time e29e0842cf thing. Since you’ve used fa5ddc990c it up, let’s 9f4c18f2b1 end this now.”7b6be22dc8ce01dc46ab

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The staggering writer looked back and forth between 00015b22f9 me and Gong Mujin with wide eyes.2d027a690eafe9cd68bf

“I’m sorry.”e0aa53dbf92e11132442

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She must have a0ba56fbd1 returned to her 66eeba0f10 senses. The writer 8a6378bd79 bowed and 5ce8e77ad9 hurried into 6726dd16fe the restaurant.7ada09da9034b3320e84

“Aaah…”2feeaad1ace647d568cc

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I sighed and swept my cfc5166178 forehead and my eyes with dfa7841f1a my right hand. He slowly drew closer to b3a63c2d85 where I was standing.8e35fce8e8faf424b980

“Don’t come e73e51812f any closer.”77d4110c7cf94a3df907

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I muttered e71bec6135 out a 9b9f7bd32e warning.1c300f02919fbcad9740

“I said 789a7494d0 don’t come e070b157dd any closer.”49c60de9f4e3d3a1c703

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He ignored 3231b1d6fa me and 65da6f7f49 snatched my 697ec7d400 wrist. Then he 75600c34d5 briskly walked 59db0c0668 away.e5f6cdc8ba37d628f534

We stood facing each 1ba50616ec other behind the restaurant 4e0ce98f8d building, surrounded by stacks d45d70ffe0 of liquor cases. He didn’t say anything and just 62db2c561b looked down at my face.4fd4e3ffea5022611d74

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“Are you jealous?”7acbef9e648d52026c96

I was taken aback b90c3c7df6 by his quiet question. I burst into 6d00b291ac laughter because it b76355eb1e was so absurd.fd52a3eed1f6ea98ce47

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“What?”9dc1e9ee5d0e1aca1120

I scowled a558cb2b96 as I cfe58defc9 asked.33b468621f3d65b8d7ff

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“I asked 3612ae396a if you 7cc59da720 were jealous. Because I was sitting at 8ba634a502 a different table and showing 1d57378314 concern for that woman.”fb2e6da4b4734a3cae3a

“Not at all!”1e1b9cf3925bb3c413e6

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I even shook my d075e25529 head vigorously from side ffbdf75aa1 to side.cb2f833e472da1737ea1

“Then why 8221fe08ae are you 483e215bb0 so emotional?”978748d2a47e04ea3b3f

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Gong Mujin dared to 0bb4b015ec point out my attitude. I was so 48f2b75124 dumbfounded that I 998c9ff5b0 couldn’t even laugh. I threw Gong Mujin e92e01f41d a fierce glare. I glared so hard f26bcb2dea that my eyes felt 614486cd20 like they were going 432d414f58 to fall out. He strode 893f858636 over to 0a7523ce1f me.76b024038dd9802fe913

As the gap between us closed, 0b67eddae1 I had to tilt my head 27403461f6 back to look up at him.35fa3c840f67e4b2cca9

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“I thought long explanations 1ce680a5ec were no longer necessary.”17428b707a2917ef7b41

“Why? Why is it ebae87ab10 no longer necessary?”19ead7ef292bc404dc1c

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I thought cc641520f2 an explanation f837e7b914 was necessary.e1b6b7e375d40d46df61

“Oh Milhee, what 96e1bb9819 do you want 1dc9a3d7c7 to hear from f68fd246cd me?”c7d4e9b42c8dd9ff7822

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For a 84abf1d3b2 moment, I 7a6ab40538 was speechless. I wanted dac66df00a to hear 0837f747c6 that you 185077d551 missed me. I wanted to hear that 1588a21daa you yearned for me. I wanted to hear that you 11bf584acd had a difficult time with the 805e33be55 way we broke up.e1e20b44c91f3898cad3

But what was 1c67c73c80 the point?2bc369306f8037748031

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That night last 3c7f005496 week may have 4a29d22684 been a mistake. Didn’t I promise ee00e7985d myself I wouldn’t dff96ac5e9 get caught up 3c23109f92 like that again?6777752095a012485590

But once again, I foolishly 4dd0d5d5be ended up being the first 5fe9a363b1 to show my emotions.ceff17b392474fd3e104

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“Then why didn’t you 2dc9885f9c explain back then?”c7b931f90efd04fc05b4

And now I 4e9878e96f was even bringing 54ebfe906c up the past.4f9273d6f10ea644d5bf

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“Because I 8fdee8f9a6 didn’t want 22ec85fa19 to talk 9d0dff833f about it.”781fb782d23de1499b60

“Ha!”75fa04512f076fc7bcdc

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A hollow b47da63eb5 scoff flowed 5ca509c914 out of 1357bb9f1a my lips.33532e64b42dceb48460

“There were so many things I 4f4affda2a had to deal with that I 903914514b didn’t even realize a weird article 6efa5d225a had come out. When I did want to 4bd63f1f5c talk to you, I couldn’t d7b1bf9aec get in touch with you. And then…”8c74d8596a2228d96156

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After pausing for a e0c23c6289 moment, he opened his 3228c19f42 mouth again.08b3d4d9e9e0f624dfa6

“But even if I did have 7fa858da50 a chance to talk to you, e2fd9268dd I probably wouldn’t have said anything. My mother, who 771adb6900 abandoned me and 74dcbeee03 got remarried, died. I ended up taking 9fc34dc1cd care of the younger 12748969b8 sister she gave birth 8ade858416 to. The person who is 44c73c67f7 supposedly my father was 5add48ac63 threatening to sue me 22ee6479d0 for assault. So if I won prize 3f40de77e4 money, I had to pay e8b48140c9 him back as a settlement.”3666726d6df487008b3a

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He spoke of the past b0ee323fbd in a calm voice. Although he had a lot 24e55c1b5e of media exposure, his family 41d7a29587 history had never been revealed. And I didn’t know much 1b69c01975 about his family either.65df3642a836f87dc6d7

“But maybe there was c58029d732 a chance for me 132f9299b1 to tell you. I once heard news eb9e232b1c about you from Heesu, 61307d080c and I also met a4ed196c68 Hyunho-hyung.”32fdd22e3d79d0cb1e43

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“My brother?”729107b32b90e766097a

Perhaps it was 0cbcda988d my instinctive attempt d2d1a47a2a to soften this 4f83aede55 cold atmosphere. The question regarding my brother suddenly be74825919 popped out of my mouth.bdc5d54ae45f7aa94ca2

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“Yeah.”3607b149f04ebbf1f472

He smiled faintly when db3be5307a he saw my reaction.fa025f3cb4f58476c391

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“After my mother dfe433b0c5 passed away, my 96d377d2ae younger sister had 79d11c190b a hard time. That’s why I c8a8898df6 couldn’t… leave her 6f7dda425d with other family 79ea69462d members. I wanted her to grow up to be a 9c3fee9183 bright and smart woman like you, so I tried 31b4c7d88b to be a good older brother like Hyunho-hyung.”4eee8b5808adb7221d4f

I couldn’t say anything and merely chewed 278c195f2d the inside of my cheek in silence.1e6faea9719a836a560a

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“I don’t know if you saw it, and so maybe you d2cf4e9c85 misunderstood, but… the photo in that article was of my sister.”76db8ff8227d4969399a

“I don’t 149b5794a9 know what 9921b88ff0 difference it 8f26e79c76 makes now.”c0b6a9df670a4bdabcda

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I was the one who 6e163213b2 brought up the past. However, I also knew ea9e5351e9 that it was useless.89132af5b083e80bad1f

“You don’t know?”9b67c8598bd59291c60e

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He ruffled 735bce549f my bangs.6f07785f499d767b8925

“I didn’t want to a8a430b91b break up with you. I just didn’t have the 5cabca066d opportunity or the right to f14ca7f6b0 hold onto you.”3836175b2b05c7515f88

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His tone 4873f9c700 sounded indifferent. Instead, I was b21a96a0f7 the one with 34c98a9582 tears in my 4ae38b2813 eyes.7ead46b0c3f48e465f1b

“Then…”68b0ac5c15a142e34d6f

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I opened my f22f35e69a mouth, not knowing c86b952455 what to say.de5c611c49795e923ff3

“Oh Milhee!”5996440483ded9b55c75

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I heard PD Han’s 647f9c2334 voice calling my name.c7bd70e3ba5590907a51

“PD Oh!”c69ed7b4523fd3bc055a

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“Where the 4d3d1a5500 hell did 30d3ac98d1 she go? She even 2652ed4971 left her 291f96705d cell phone e1a5371927 behind. So you’re saying she 0089ea0517 was fighting with Athlete 1f0ef05886 Gong Mujin just now?”9d339c4a6f590bdd9dbd

“That’s… Just now…”11df68bb9eda198c44c0

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I heard Writer 1273baa513 Park urging the e57210ab52 maknae writer to c96e206fc4 speak. I left Gong Mujin eaf4bd912d behind and ran to dc35ab6849 the restaurant. My heart 74c0a613eb was pounding.c90037cc8fe1aa14c9dc

“I’m here!”4da1234fb7abd58561d8

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“Hey! You!”f70dc20f8f987f21bea1

PD Han put 9bc0988668 his hands on cf76a3a037 his waist and 7a4437d9bd shouted. Writer Park also sighed c9efc20046 and looked relieved.b9f430f2ef743daf011d

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“Well, our maknae came in e3e0716c45 and suddenly started crying.”e3d1e41316b3bddade62

I smiled awkwardly 4e0d762913 and waved my 6b4f260dd3 hand, indicating nothing 19fec15a66 happened. I just hoped Gong Mujin wouldn’t pop up 2abb31e1b9 from the same place I came from. This was completely different 95b50e870d from when we roamed ea6ff8c44b around campus as a 4d1d306fad couple back in college. Gong Mujin was now a sports 8cb5a034b5 star recognized by half the world, c877316fc7 not to mention the entire nation.c5eb6b98456b48716446

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“Nothing happened.”f6a0f5508787b3a31612

PD Han nodded. Writer Park started talking to me as 29d8787c96 he walked towards the restaurant parking lot.4189655cbd21ca9e11f9

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“Nothing really happened? Our maknae 0f17ca37cc was saying ec8296eea6 something ridiculous. She said that e47030c709 Athlete Gong Mujin c8ce6537e0 was really bad. That our a3542feffa PD Oh ac75b35316 was so 7d5deff379 pitiful. She keeps crying. She said that the two of you d075e13923 were yelling at each other outside.”b73de5f8bb8d3a047465

It was 0fe9546305 a mess. I was worried about Gong Mujin, and I was very 52b3e3a10c concerned about the chaotic atmosphere among the production crew.952de75729b49faa0ea9

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“It’s nothing 45ea79f3a3 like that. We were just talking, and 8817b47be0 I think our maknae misunderstood 5165b09f8b because she had too much 6d0225d5af to drink.”024d9a6c88fefe21db3e

“Well, then b21b2abf47 that’s a 3d7aac2b9b relief. There’s still a lot of filming left to 6abd727801 do… Go in and sort things out. The vibe 22d11fc2ff is absolutely 19904cda7f ridiculous right 16cca25f93 now. From the beginning, it seemed like things were a 33b91949d6 bit awkward between PD Oh and Athlete Gong Mujin. That’s why 9c88d1a9dc people started 2981a459c4 talking. You know how 92fcb4beab it is. The people at a7b76fea22 broadcasting stations catch e5671062c9 on real quick.”742a927a2e41d64b7baa

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I nodded, ffef8b125b indicating I 87128a1385 understood.4c678c71b38a05416f0d

“I don’t believe all the 0135949651 strange rumors, but Gong Mujin 32a6a5d754 has been involved in a 62b4eda38e lot of scandals. So I wondered if something f81d305543 happened with PD Oh, too…”433f0f0a9da5b9c43fec

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“It’s nothing 7e890693fb like that. You know how 0131784c24 I am, don’t 77a755c030 you? And you don’t believe 8c85fd797e in strange rumors. Athlete Gong Mujin 338e842760 is a good 91cd411530 person.”195e3ac7723bf4060eee

I felt frustrated because there 81ee2d2d26 was nothing I could do e22871e04b in this situation other than 8711f84258 to raise my voice.1c9956141b916251a829

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“Let’s head inside aae1c63188 for now.”458327e0d4a5bea0e1ed

As I entered the b80c3424c9 restaurant with Writer Park, 3f2374aba5 everyone’s eyes shifted to f06fdaf45c me.c9331d22fd888b042fbf

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“I’m sorry! I was a bit ea6808376d stubborn with our subject. I’m sorry! I’ll make sure c0d7a3dc4d it doesn’t happen f91d3f5009 again.”0ee2f2381fc14cbb731a

In the end, it was e80d2916e5 concluded that I was being 612373f380 stubborn in order to create a74d83e848 good footage. The restaurant, which had b52c4124c6 grown quiet for a 6a86e4b3b2 moment due to my faa3b1799b arrival, became noisy again. In the meantime, c0b831d30c Gong Mujin also 430f6a7f0f entered the restaurant.01e58b53a55b15b795d6

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“Athlete Gong Mujin, even though our PD Oh 0307975023 may look like this, she’s not normal.”4aeec84acf3d80f4fc73

The veteran camera d13dc99e47 director spoke to b8529b47bf Gong Mujin with 72ba5b076b a smile.d6c8f32b88f43bae92f6

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“Yes, I’m 67e7c4b568 sorry for b1d5341d9f being unusual. Since I’m not 69c1ec6628 normal, our program bf7e4d349a will also be 5905bb1547 an extraordinary hit! Let’s all 4723b0824f do our 84ff2737ae best!”f4d6bb4de7e610a6b221

I stood up ec72f4c884 and raised my b44489e548 glass into the 591df4e376 air. The atmosphere f4d8a7bb7d changed in 0e7ec9d814 an instant. Thank goodness. Everyone quickly filled c2b4f3ea3b their glasses and e5cad92adf raised them high.57ef0efcbd21955fae96

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“Let’s hit daebak!”4f55fb5f4942ad10bb3f

“Let’s hit daebak!”f9c90bdfb6f297eaeb17

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I always got goosebumps f6a536ad2b whenever I made a ab61bf1c2b toast, but today was a86d595b2f especially intense. I gulped down a dc2a71cee1 glass of soju.52469228a2a91745e8ab

It was cold, so I felt even more b60507739e dazed and sad… I hoped that the confusing f4582a6e07 conversation would fade away with alcohol.f04e51d1e1df8fb130d9

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