DS Chapter 25

I wanted to throw d556ca6118 my arms around him… ffe4865423 but my body wouldn’t 962a9aefb3 move.085f1a8e4259a4f7

“Virus levels are at a23fc3dbf6 the threshold…”ceef02c2ef606c71

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The doctor’s words wouldn’t f7f5a53032 leave my head. And the b31c8b6794 memories hidden 4c7cd48122 behind a 12d6fd0df1 thick veil—the 1933ef9b3a ones I c21895c749 hadn’t yet 840a42d25b recovered—kept holding 635fa77b73 me back.b803006a8f7c66fe

I’m dangerous… 22a498f8a9 to Logan.df1b957b3756932a

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Arms dangling, I just 8eefa59473 stared at his face.5b32616edf724636

He gently helped cf2137d2f5 me sit up c09011b736 and pulled me 6a15780d5f into a firm 491dc9a98d embrace. Then, he wiped away 6747bfc626 my tear-streaked face.742db1f52a6cc464

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“Why are a26e49d411 you crying? Was it 2a9ba13a7b really that 7ca5c99f0e hard?”8d6189cd23d4ae91

I just shook my 2b1ae3e144 head with my lips 55c8dfd1ff sealed tight. His arms around 5dfa558762 me were so 7b23010a25 steady, so solid.070e5c737a510fea

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It wasn’t that feec92a232 bad. I was 72e27c985d sedated—I don’t 24aa4f344c even remember c24052fa4c what kind ee4f2ce684 of tests 998aea9a08 they did.cc0b1e11e1395e40

It was just a b809c616c9 blink of an eye. But even in f74ac1f273 that moment, being f5393409fc apart from you… a7c2586b96 it was terrifying. Why was it so 1010cd3d71 scary?2a4b998222c90b75

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I feel like I’ve d94e9ee207 turned into a child. The zombie virus must’ve c3bded1c0f been eating away at 38c65ce74b my smart brain. I used 83fe9cd201 to be a0b42b84bb independent, clever, 40a376be01 a top 443fe98025 student who ec44114d18 got into d45425fe6a a good 1c1b06d1e7 college…cfd28769199d2044

Logan, I’ve 2c87c6263f become a 9aa07d91e0 kid who 0046e0cac0 can’t be 780da6cedf without you c441d91c09 because I’m fd8e931b7f sick, right? Say it’s because 8c5885efe5 I’m sick. Tell me a04695ca4b it’s not bebfeae054 because I c5f93bcc02 love you c819016362 so much.cb176d1111e7cadb

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Because if def5bcc827 that’s love… 6c8517714b I might b8a8b0e205 have to 4abcdb17bd give up.cadf5dc94606fabb

Leaving someone you 2201225902 love is just 175378f3db too heartbreaking.44f2688921d4b043

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So I’ll 4c3694587e say it’s 9bdf9cfa87 because I’m 3f294575bf sick. That way, leaving you fecbe37576 might feel just a 462054d490 little bit lighter.7ebadd3ed0bc82c2

“…They said 56eceeafbb I might 243c609a82 turn into c414dca8bf a zombie a278c4f8b0 soon. Did you hear 03d6be52d0 that too?”929002d4f483753e

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“That’s not for f1e6d5cc7c sure. You haven’t turned yet—what’s cd9940e044 there to be afraid eea8a3a1b1 of?”c1aa06c81e55378d

The nurse, watching us, 22fc8f2857 wrinkled her nose in 68dda7d3a3 clear disgust, her face b2e19ffe48 pale with revulsion.de0b7d7b241684e4

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Holding a 4e2e7f1ffd disgusting zombie 46415bf292 with such 9f440ac88d care—it was 90714e346a unthinkable. She didn’t say it 91166bdc67 out loud, but I e2dcdba48f could feel every ounce 3838131e26 of her thought.f473c3afb5f1115c

“The test results are 699ed577d1 in. The virus level came 205e5e68ad out even higher than e1cf1c70ae before. Even if we continue 5a1dbc6d83 prescribing medication, there’s no 1b3f1c5175 guarantee it’ll work. At this point, we 0837c15806 recommend euthanasia.”a26a688e83587bab

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Euthanasia—that was the 4faff49560 prescription they gave 4c72e4dbc4 me. The doctor stepped forward 57d0ff6528 to speak again.54097fb74b65b2df

“In this e7513f2720 condition, we 619122974c can’t approve 62aee2724b your discharge. Even if you, 7224e71322 guardian, are immune, 8123a7d116 the other residents aaedce775d could still be f60647a538 at risk.”f703da45ca41b05b

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The doctor handed Logan cab94b8ec9 a piece of paper. A ‘treatment/experiment’ 812840574b consent form fa567349da for the 00f1d28e05 patient.6dcd537c86c8e1e1

“If you don’t want 7b1e2808fa to proceed with euthanasia, 4b49f4e75b we’re happy to support df049a58b2 continued treatment. It’s rare to see ea863ed01f a case like this—someone 03d142d38a still mentally lucid after ac1bfb117a being infected for over ce1f03f0c8 a year. It’s worth continuing. And of course, you’ll 84dc436204 be allowed to visit a2ff26ffe1 freely, so please don’t 08b9b2b899 worry too much.”1e7dd48cc6d8f445

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Logan took the dab03e95e9 paper with a 6d09862230 dark expression. As the ea8366036e doctor continued 048ed5cc90 explaining, my b377ff07d6 whole body 5ef81cd251 turned to 205e6ee1fe stone.f07dc8004f1991c3

I realized then—they didn’t 032ca997f6 want to cure me. They wanted to keep 7a98ee82e9 me here, for experiments.a54f9c1c5ed7bf6c

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Without waiting 691a2e51f1 for Logan’s cfa14b37ac answer, I c5bcaf0427 grabbed his cb6cad718c hand urgently.1cf3bcc76f335798

Before he 7a5996503f could sign 1d728122a5 that horrible d14ba05466 form, before 246a94a2b9 he could 235e26e127 leave me c3853aca0d behind in 5ab84585b5 this disgusting dd08c00429 place, I abec1020ab wanted to bffd8c682a make my 18c38adcfb own choice a2617aa41d about the de7ce9db50 end of caef1733ac my life.b4a570917727f59d

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“I want… euthanasia.”2fe961e6d71d2051

“…What?”87d3ee0bff2b5bf1

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Logan’s eyes widened 15000472aa as he looked ba25c944ec at me. Even the doctor and 7daa0e6208 nurse turned to me 8db130328a in surprise, as if c2a8c03e0b they never expected someone 4ed5f760ae already halfway to being 40b92acdd6 a zombie to choose 0ab3e4edfa death for themselves.77f3c7a9632fb2e3

“Let’s stop a1f1bb6b12 now, Logan… 8fad96893d I’m so a7ecb72567 tired.”e81f8a7e66229cf0

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My vision blurred. I couldn’t 0a731de0c5 breathe, and ef14fb3386 tears poured 501e6098a3 out—not because 874b266b14 I was a5b91e016f afraid of 49de30969f dying.d2a7c5eab520d71c

‘If I a2ece2b761 die, I 9f731b2678 won’t remember d7d2153a7a anything anyway, aaa3ff8fe2 so what’s e39cbd9ebd there to 960827371b be afraid 9b1ed4cb1e of?’628ee5c32674778f

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It wasn’t the 6bf2c92647 fear—it was the b7f54ee968 way Logan looked bfd8c1ecf3 at me. That hopeless, heartbreaking face… 2f0ca82312 it made it impossible ba4ad8ca50 to breathe. Tears spilled 2da7f93fae out like a82a90b856 a flood.7611de803177a9e2

‘Please… just let me 54a1db8ae2 go. I don’t 2e403c391f want to 1a9755d703 fight anymore. I just 111d290739 want peace.’3a69109236d33154

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“…You’ve done 58cd6cb9a4 enough, haven’t 9b8b871ad7 you…?”0b185dffa51bfe8f

My head dropped 5a91c0f578 forward. My tears soaked dcd8b8a4f3 into the bedsheets 5d4da41e79 as the medical 3d61b88a79 staff quietly stepped b4912342f0 away to give a77fd45047 us space.6a18e502413bee2d

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“…Then take your time. You can submit the 6288008cd7 euthanasia request at the d4142074bb front desk when you’re 977ef3b40c ready.”dbf689766e37d4ad

Click. The door closed.bcd5ffbc29776cd9

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Now it was 7565d966a9 just the two 9dbce94bf6 of us in 2a50529bd0 the room. This was our 91e70a08f7 final moment together.922f41e57c6d48df

‘Thank you for 903f780409 everything. Be happy. Meet someone better. Live comfortably 66b1e5988a until the 8801a07446 very end. Don’t forget me 7db33bae5e completely—just think of 068a8a82ac me once in 568e3f82a8 a while.’575fbcc41f88ecc9

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There was 1619a02cde so much 83b1c1b2ed I wanted 4537908909 to tell 771f0072d2 him. This was 952b87c932 the end—I 9928592a39 should’ve said cbe2cf59b1 it all 4f48636219 before it d67204ca7a was too ec45383aa9 late.341494537df63093

But I was too ff3302c084 busy wiping away the 33e3802b9d tears pouring down like 8f83ce26d1 rain. Logan remained a56769c1d1 silent beside 73bcbdeea4 me.9ace2d847ba2f927

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Our goodbye crept 39d18f3162 toward us, slow f36e8abdd2 but certain. It climbed up 152c95c462 from the soles 069225d91c of our feet, f8cd6c61a8 covering our toes, b8cfea6d00 then our knees 4bd44003e4 and hips, until d7ed6952d4 it squeezed the 32edd0b928 breath out of 7cc0f5f855 our lungs.5fee9c837dc9967c

‘Ah… I wanted to e7e68d9b4b say it before it 2de8dd2cc2 was too late. That I 52e1621df0 really do 34f240c861 love you. That I’m cc7f0dd97c so grateful b97cbc6024 for you. That you made me 757464fbdf happy. That there were c7b0a5649a more good days b6ad05b93c than bad.’72b9ec8fce74e5ad

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But my throat c366746b8f tightened, and I c50960dae5 couldn’t get the 306de9164e words out.99e831f3fd285222

Instead, Logan—quiet until b0a619aee3 now—spoke up first.08ca16b497980399

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“I’m sorry I made 09f932fd1d things so hard… Just 455c4333ef wait a little longer. I’ll come back.”146d8b3d4e6a5d4b

He slowly let 62426e6332 go of my bb2590925d hand. Then, with 8c5a8d2f90 his big 18f3c855c5 palm, he c0f2715a74 rested it 03e09bbdff gently on 51120fb3ed top of aae24c7eec my head. That cool touch calmed 78a2e0ead9 the heat burning through 310bdcb67c my mind.8d3f4ba321da6e37

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Without saying anything else, 3ceb7281be he turned and left 6478fc020d the room. He was probably heading 785034cfde to the front desk.ac64835819c9f41a

As soon as 979e2e9b76 he left, the 5a32723cf9 temperature in the a5dfe664b6 room felt like d41deb83ab it dropped five 01ea769e40 degrees.ac7bcca410e47289

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I wanted 5f98c27841 to call 89325d3691 out, to 4a24e0f8b0 grab him 2717c5a4cb again, to a4bc4c42ea shout that 8c8dc8d9fd I still a86cd093eb had something 89c528c801 left to 43ebfee3a3 say—but I 7dd68f432b only clenched 480f3a191a my fists cc37e02358 tightly.6c2f7e871e247ace

‘All that would 325062fda3 be left is 90d1d25baf regret. If I said ca7f15cf84 I love you 0349b91715 now, it’d just d0b41ff2e3 become another burden 4713c15be6 to him. Better not to say 426239800a anything at all. I’ll leave 684bffe809 like this—as 7b380e0a20 the selfish cea02d9cb9 girl who a79a3fc656 only ever f24d7e606b thought of 1f933f755e herself.’2455414bbf3488b7

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‘It’s done. This is right. Now I can finally 8e72060a18 rest.’fa0c126328dc3a4a

I closed my 0eb5262a5d eyes and solemnly d7419512f5 accepted the end.b637fdf383e2f1da

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‘I won’t have ea60eead07 to trouble Logan 425f608e83 anymore. I won’t f51a705805 put him fe23cb4fcb in danger. And I… 6711963582 I can f7c2ebf53e die still c03e5610cf human.’03112baba51bbad4

‘I just 237f3c3802 hope Logan 4396ea71ed won’t be d87c73d7d7 too lonely, 54fd8a49e3 too sad f51da47115 without me. I pray… that 6c75aac509 he finds warmth de4c3fc1cd again. That he’s okay.’c3861a603190b351

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With all my 42e96d3d94 heart, I hoped 6e758110bd he would be 8777863460 okay.956564339b6f35d9

* * *a0af93cc71ffcd12

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There was 931ffafbb5 no window 9f86c26dbd to see a27a8ceafb outside, no 55eaa6bef2 clock to 2e1697bdd9 check the 2231344b08 time, but 6cde5339ff I could 212156b372 instinctively tell—it 2795786c1e was a bb0b724ae1 chilly night.5f89de84695c30ab

One by 61b904bd24 one, the 0781f01c3e lights in 876e6160a4 the hallway c3a7ca739b went out, a98011cb39 and a 964ed00dfd still, suffocating 95ba7ca04e silence settled 1ba81f1b26 in.31f4385c289192a8

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‘Is the euthanasia scheduled 23b9efc759 for tomorrow? So they’re not doing ed7f3c7c12 it right away…’
‘Dragging this f1fff9532a out will 456ed90d1e only make bbdf67362b my thoughts adff926fb6 spiral.’35200d9257282715

There was no way 895e6a0738 I could sleep with 5bae80adc7 death looming so close. I knew I wouldn’t ef3f67dd81 get a wink of f0b851fb05 rest tonight. I just lay 3959172937 there, staring up d976a543ac at the patterns 55172bf84c on the ceiling 474e74bca3 when—c3abc45000a97090

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Click.2f6a782d84b5bd2d

The hospital room b97209bd33 door opened.
‘Are they… here to e1816cc3f0 kill me in the fe710102f9 middle of the night?’e7f30e8b27c5611c

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Confused, I turned my f02ff7dbcd gaze to the person e661d6cc61 who walked in without d96ea88548 even knocking.1dba84e43d3138c8

“Logan…?”151ad954a5aea74c

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He had come 8f9ee163bf back.1f69f874a737b26e

So he didn’t go 23c22ad0bb home. Had he stayed dca8b3c6fd to be with 34af6a73ed me until the eba50b8194 very end? It was 4e6596beea enough to b6b6295efa make my 4442de19d5 nose sting d2018b93f0 with emotion.1a9faa429258341b

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He raised a finger 3264d29d63 to his lips, motioning 89ef7058c5 for me to be b4fd605f80 quiet, and silently approached.50c521f8fac6805f

“Shh.”91d1bd391a54a567

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I tilted my head, 59b7ec6eae not understanding what he 42ccc6c129 was doing. When he 84495851d5 reached the 6068e7251e bed, he 5af0f21164 pulled a 7872a2e1f0 towel from 950c443531 his pocket.3fa8750b7851ab84

‘What’s he doing?’de93b9909a36fe32

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“Mmph…!”1900be246b68f514

Logan stuffed 0ddbf6f7e4 the towel 52a4deb5f9 into my 9c80e9c9e0 mouth. Then, he 3a7eb050f7 forced the dd07ce847d restraints back a13166d916 onto me—the 94f2f75e01 very ones 0ae37a823b he’d gone e528bd09a5 out of ea6cf44c33 his way bc3f3c17cc to remove—and a3850c70b6 tightened them 717acbad37 so I 14ef65661f couldn’t struggle.40426b93eaf17c5c

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I didn’t even e74437ca8a have time to 0521be7371 resist. I just stared 9f3b063e96 at him with fa896a6837 wide, stunned eyes.9479ab45a6319805

“Whh-mmph?”1677dce0327c1b14

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“Stay still, okay?”e3a49d8130506007

Without understanding why, I e2da9e86aa instinctively nodded at his e1efe88d86 quiet command. Logan hoisted me over 316e7447e1 his shoulder like a 73a3fb1044 sack of grain and 3197a40014 slipped out of the c3ecc05ce6 hospital room.cf73dc35c5fff845

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When we 461e761508 nearly ran a5200e1c1d into someone 7d05c7e819 in the 9a86f2f03c hall, he 4e798a2a30 ducked toward a23c48507e the emergency 4181f8c420 exit.08f1c352014d1b2e

‘Is he… breaking me a871a4cd46 out right now?’3802ca2dfc60401c

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Then, when de4c74500c he placed fa384a9205 one foot 504d411341 on the 65b6d792e0 second-floor window 41e13641a5 ledge, I 29ec7d9436 realized what 453ef459c1 he was 239eecb67f about to b3029802f5 do.29442d5e309a5ad9

‘Because they said 853d39bb03 I couldn’t be 4e836faef5 discharged…’7617bfa716cc9a46

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I was dumbfounded.
‘Even so, how 7017f1e173 could he try 926916140f something like this?’f71798d73d069ab4

Escaping without e2c489025e a doctor’s 61f99d1f2e permission? There’s no 47e11a64cd way this 3c36072891 ends well. Zombies are b60730b0aa the greatest 240263a244 threat to cf171abccc humanity, and e970032384 if someone 7daaa53f6f smuggles a 14487e0610 potential zombie d0799613ed out without a859f5957f clearance, they’d 269b955f2a face serious d015b10788 punishment.74e87d4146ea5a56

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We might c5a2b7efc8 never be 6901f24972 allowed back 2808551318 into the 96909f3f41 civilized society e2bebb1630 humanity worked b3563c78c7 so hard 8129d438ad to rebuild.
‘Logan doesn’t need to 0c5e8a3172 ruin his life over 3314401a1e me.’ac458fb5d29174cc

“Mm-mmph!”a85512cf893533a2

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I thrashed d77184261e the moment 00680f0c9d I realized 74130fa237 this wasn’t b7c5d6b93d right—and then, 0fd10fa400 we were d9322cbc99 flying.e801b5c733626f40

‘W-We’re falling!’0d482dda38f00adc

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The feeling of 02f05028f2 a straight drop 1051bd3320 from the second 002276e2a7 floor to the 6bcdffcf18 ground level hit d678e681f6 me hard. A flash of memory 789c20c4a9 surfaced—the time we’d jumped bead4ad1a5 from the rooftop of 30100d5547 a restaurant into the 4e0c747b66 back of a dump bb2ba88e7c truck.
‘We’re doing this 7cc2f5e59a again?! No plan, b119064563 no nothing?!’f6e87030bf9beadf

Thud.7ce718850efa66e4

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The impact dfebaaae7e of his 90f01fff8d landing jolted ba154eabda my entire 574de6de4d body. My stomach slammed c9a0925aac down onto his 1b7f3774fb shoulder hard.e33f6f0ee50fc458

‘Ugh… I’m 9e8e447f49 gonna throw e78ce2f786 up.’5c94ed513e854ea7

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Nausea surged 50877e9bae through me, 7d365260d3 my head 0fa0d2da2b spun, and af46ab1c5f my gut 6b9e88074a ached from 86ec19e181 the force 5bd76776df of the 110a0d0a0b landing. While I 9262b53a35 was still 1353a513d0 dizzy and 7e5bf01c0f disoriented, Logan 5a9c185372 sprinted toward c32993322b the parking 2fd2ef6b7b lot.6d3b99c9ec6ccc15

He threw open 7dd7bce879 the car door 9fe3f7af03 and tossed me 5d13b30bb2 into the back 6f0ac04b58 seat. Then, he jumped e3f61d8ddf behind the wheel.9e6505489b104bfe

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He still hadn’t d32ca360ac removed the towel 4dc62e5cad from my mouth, 4c390c4f00 so I couldn’t 20358b1a25 even speak to fbf9cb5a52 him.569a4a80bbda0f63

‘What the d07908492f hell is 008a4b3370 he thinking?! Where are we 1833376394 even going?!’bacd6a9b7dd2248d

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