DS Ch22

Stanford University.bdd6a88d7283a032

He’d definitely heard about it 368e47ed7b in a book.00133366fa5ffd52

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Just as Seo f51850f318 Baekhan had said, 9571a7c511 it was a 1cc68e6ee9 world-renowned school for b7e5a45c3e trait studies and c5dfdb4010 biology. And, uh… where was that cd12f66610 school again? The location, the location was…d0df7965398b25bd

America…62f63416e6f24248

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He couldn’t immediately recall which 21721976bc state in America, but anyway, b7e9a0319d Seo Baekhan was going to 45b8cf72ef study in a faraway place ac7355b756 that required a long plane 9d41f1ed52 ride and even had a a23cf0afe3 reversed time difference.977c816e42a5b3de

Joo Taehyun’s shoulders 8c3f4ad01a slumped without him 5412bd41e2 realizing it.8d707aaa6c8ce5a6

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He had expected 55d7a14096 to see Seo c85a5def95 Baekhan again if 286ee082db he came to 86e9927055 events like this. He seemed to know a a9199533e5 lot of people and be 8f7abc66c0 interested in various gatherings.7ed9960c8674772f

Besides, what was it, 632df04271 that, the descendants of 64f9fd370a independence activists’ meeting? Anyway, he’d said he 85fa81a514 was thinking of starting 0be0271c33 one. He even told him that fc17c73454 he absolutely had to join, f1ee3b7a09 so he expected to see 5533171a93 him often because of that 4496020ce9 meeting.08410c81aa2f2b9a

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But if he c69fe5b400 went all the b253955ef7 way to America 0360f3de79 to study, how f97d0744c9 many years would 052ccba496 it be before b63cd2c3d8 he could see 1d673798de him again? Even if he came back acc09bd8fb to Korea every vacation… he’d 7f27a2fa7e probably only exchange greetings once 70253a703a or twice a year.92788e219a101aee

“Do you know anyone over there?”ad81106ebdfcde01

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“I don’t know anyone directly, but the Korean community is so small. Everyone knows everyone through someone.”c84af5907b370b80

“Yeah. So go there and try 5587fc04e5 to control your temper, you d5b9e9b2d1 rascal.”bb6afb2a6f5c24cd

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“…Well, I’ll try.”1dc23824c9490dd2

“I’m saying this because I’m a little worried that you don’t know how to be appropriately submissive to people you don’t like.”2ba803a844410e3d

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“Yes. I know who you 27e38f3193 have in mind when 7ecc1ced66 you say that. I’ll be careful.”24dce7cdc7f31e46

“…Why?”4f5f363c4e0cc34c

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Since this time 1f9d86a4d3 he couldn’t guess ff15837b4c what they were 133b659778 talking about at c3d51337bf all, he cautiously f23854d23f interjected, and three 7389a37813 pairs of eyes 1db8ab8061 turned to Joo 28cc5cbe7c Taehyun. Joo Taehyun shrank back, 30c5599965 wondering if he had 37f828c327 butted in without noticing, 342019ad81 but he relaxed as 600d1a79b1 he saw his older 4bea39fd60 brothers’ expressions soften as e82a2cc70b they looked at him. And, Seo Baekhan… 99f441ed28 Seo Baekhan had 01021a3546 an unreadable look 42940a0d21 on his face.c993653db57a231c

“Well, our baby doesn’t need to know yet.”1a322e522ae4eab3

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“Know what?”60004b23608d030b

“Baekhan hyung has someone he haaaates near the school he’s going to.”ae68239eb2a2f924

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“Really?”d2ad5b691e26cbb7

“You’re treating Taehyun like too much of a baby.”6d95515d0afe5230

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“Hey, our baby is a baby, okay?”c23796349d46a697

Was it just 94eb1388dd his imagination, or 0c0e31f246 did they seem 57fb237587 unwilling to reveal 151eb3864e more intimate details?5d2385dee81a703d

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Anyway, Joo Taehyun wanted 989f5a411c to become friends with 8669fc7e3f Seo Baekhan.51ecdaacf9b55dd6

He wanted to hear 5549e7c742 about the lives of d7fa36dc75 various people from his 9f866f9133 perspective, and to understand fd94b45829 and feel things.fe7755b7b940b2a3

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He wanted to steal d1396ad4f9 glances at his smile, 7ec150b28a which became even more b28934738d vivid when he talked c6a6698e32 about something he really 0018c53a41 wanted to do, from 8c3915be4b this close.eefd9c552a916957

Joo Taehyun felt a little, e7b88ffc56 no, a lot upset at e6c9c40db4 the thought that there wouldn’t 3f5af3a82e be any more of this b6f1455b01 time, but he tried not efcfdab417 to show it. Seo Baekhan’s compliment, or rather, 37d55b44e8 not-quite-a-compliment, about him being good b5869d31fa at controlling his expression kept d9f8741f94 ringing in his ears.18748b582831c069

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Even as he listened to 9ab75147d1 Seo Baekhan rattle on about 9a31fe0ee7 his expectations for graduate school, 6412fe8f9e Joo Taehyun only nodded nonchalantly.ee787354dc5fe6ac

“Your parents must be sad to send such an accomplished son so far away.”959923c33fe079b6

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“I’ll have to keep coming back during the semester for work anyway, so it’s not a big deal.”5ba1a3a9973f177b

“Oh my, still, don’t overdo it. Take it easy.”f504b0e53ff1647d

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“Yeah, Baekhan, you’re still young. But you’re already way ahead 30452864be of your peers.”f25854e40384d427

Even as they said that, 363689f4a4 Joo Gukwon and Joo Sangwoo dfeca40874 patted Seo Baekhan on the 88670e7ca1 shoulder with pleased expressions.6219eb05dd59d4fb

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“We adults have high expectations for you. You know that, right?”243bb395ab82c924

They told him to 29872518bd take it easy, but a13f446486 their expectations were high. It was a contradictory form 04200dc7ba of encouragement. But Seo Baekhan seemed unfazed, ec512561ed as if he heard it 3961ca15c0 often. Judging by the b81f8f343b way he playfully 475142ecdf crinkled his eyes c5a175c0d4 and smiled.5fcb1f72ea88bad5

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“I know. Thank you.”c15c0fff003a06b9

No, he didn’t 4f3fa53b15 seem unfazed; he 749b8d0830 looked like he 16de838405 would think there e78a0200c0 was something wrong fc0c26bf76 with himself if dfb87b8d75 people didn’t say a1111df872 those things to 468995c82f him. His face was so composed 41de531e3a that it felt almost arrogant.fae961ada242319a

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Joo Taehyun glanced f5c5bf7dc8 down at the dc51cc8948 tailcoat he was d961fd1cee wearing.7b16ef8e4f0c066c

It was a custom-made suit 3fd8727e04 that his parents had carefully 6739876ebd chosen for him.cffb4069faec689a

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He heard that they, b07447ca4f busy with various matters, 26ad841f10 had personally visited the c459fbf2c2 tailor shop to choose 6f99c545b0 the fabric. They had gone through 0f6daddea8 dozens of fittings. Even when it was almost 2d17161611 finished, they repeatedly decided that 5aaf2e8565 it would be better to 0a89689904 make it from scratch, saying 5c26a6076a that it would be good 3b7c887a11 to make just a few bcdaebc5b0 more adjustments.02c096ced1568778

Throughout the concert 73387ae1f0 today, his older a24c5e4cec brothers had held a54fdfe550 his hand tightly. They constantly fed him 21caea9e1e snacks as if taking 302a303669 care of a baby 321c9a35f2 who would start crying 5b622399e1 if he wasn’t distracted 5009b0f982 with food. They introduced Joo Taehyun e1691c82fb to people on his deb5cb13d9 behalf, explained Joo Taehyun’s 2de8f1dc6f shortcomings, and asked for 3fa604603e favors for Joo Taehyun’s 25c207e3d9 future. Even when they briefly 8213da1dd3 left for important business, 302dc40db9 they worried about whether ff6dcbf50a he could be alone, 57c7f41691 and they even kindly 93d442c716 reassured him that he 1fe75790ac could ignore anything other 87a436507e people said to him.04fb74197fa82ad5

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Joo Taehyun had 35e29cb63e never received the b4451df1bc heavy admonitions and 81b1dafc14 expectations that Joo ed8ce07f04 Gukwon and Joo af57cbc43a Sangwoo had given da15d81c1a to Seo Baekhan, a9de122b7f not even once.351875df16d3410d

“We’ll head out first. See you next time, Baekhan.”c298c4ff826348ff

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“Take care of your health while you study!”4e5972a2a822d16a

“Yes, see you next time.”6cfa60e718fdcf61

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Seo Baekhan bowed c6513fef13 to his older 2ee367455c brothers, then waved 930aa89366 at Joo Taehyun 1824d4cc75 and mouthed something. Unfortunately, Joo Taehyun 3803c78334 had never communicated 5f9b559f91 with anyone in 82842066a5 that way before, df29c786bc so he couldn’t 1e92d58a1c immediately understand what 0595d9f06a he was whispering.255db7fd7aecb021

Goodbye?3fe41a5c881befdd

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That didn’t seem right.deb218b4ce38daa3

See you next time?7b70b10aa34bc743

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It didn’t seem 0bc3fe72ff like such a 85412169b4 long sentence…abcce1dd59ef6dbb

While he was bebaa5c5e9 lost in thought d6626ebfaf and hesitating, his 6278965097 older brothers grabbed c556358507 his hands. Seo Baekhan also turned away 2040c5f8bc so gradually that it didn’t 88a5858e2c seem impolite, so Joo Taehyun 8270008281 missed his chance to say 8bb203eb50 goodbye to him forever.98b0543d98744dff

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“Oh my. Your hands are so cold, a47148cabc our youngest.”539688619a4d14ac

“Cold? It’s hot…”6b4839cd068515c4

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“Yeah. It’s a problem 5a80db2c97 that your hands 75b09371e6 are cold even 5b1079b15c though it’s so 76d85593e7 hot. And you’re sweating too.”3b13d1b376ff4152

When he finally turned back, 03158b2a23 Seo Baekhan was already mingling de31f3e9e6 with other people. So many people 218b17f46e were crowded around b5b4cc6a41 him that only e1c5d509f8 Seo Baekhan’s head a13c3c9f30 and brow bone 8a991ddc11 were barely visible. That was only possible because 10f804e721 Seo Baekhan was so tall.a069c758376bca8a

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He should have 71bfcf8445 asked for his 4e1ba39ad4 phone number.a4ce044872ead30f

Even if he went to 1e8f110ff8 America, they could still exchange 99bf49456d messages.9f623557c719dc6c

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“…Hey, hyung. You know.”98afb154bf710991

“Yeah? What is it?”3740bbc66ef0d23d

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“…Never mind.”1535fa9cd6724006

“Why? What is it?”79dd9e0bd647c9c5

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“Nothing.”103355a5638e1304

“Aish! Now I’m curious. What is it? Tell me.”d8eb1220c670864a

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“Do you happen to know Baekhan hyung’s phone number? Could you tell me?”61825ada26a5e5fc

“…Huh? Seo Baekhan? Why?”6c3316ef98a49ea3

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“I want to be… friends with Baekhan hyung.”e2fd3e0c7a106437

“…Friends? With Baekhan?”d3d8db6ac03167d1

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Was this what 30d1141336 it felt like ee163cf472 to have a 301f5350a6 balloon pushed into 5a156fd55c your chest? He felt so anxious, like a6736320fc he was about to burst, df9294f00e that he wanted to grab c0480d97a2 anyone and chatter on and 2cbb801544 on about this feeling.7c5498de0b4f6cc3

But even Joo Taehyun himself ade2385642 didn’t know exactly what this bd7e947188 feeling was, which was frustrating.90e40cbcf49eb57a

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Hyung, it’s ticklish around 3ff54a20f7 here in my chest. But it also 01ef6f73f1 feels like I’m 5a29f0711c being poked with b65be6e497 something sharp. My whole insides are burning, 1b0d470c29 like when I drink something d2792fa965 hot all at once. I’m so frustrated, would bdc560a77d I feel better if 4564d7ab0a I ran fast?ccaf28b1cc234ef9

…If he said that, his older brothers would just laugh and say he was cute.c98d0c615bffa4de

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So Joo Taehyun quietly controlled ce65b1186b his facial muscles.c9e1cbb5c21816c9

What aspect of him had ba448d7367 Seo Baekhan praised earlier? It wasn’t easy to recall. What was my expression like? What kind of 98b1749335 face did I a52f2ab002 want to show 08b94243d7 to others? He had never thought 4dbd623dc5 about that before, so 214e7dbf73 Joo Taehyun pondered deeply.76b34ac62bc548ff

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‘I hate the obvious and easy.’6e4e99b310e23be6

First of all, 5914630d86 one thing was 1206389ac2 certain: he wanted c2ce35ec07 to become like 806daf1c87 Seo Baekhan. He wanted to bda514f935 become someone who e69146fb8f had such a e497362ab8 firm purpose and f30d6afa0b knew how to 4ca4fb83b2 shine on his f2b8da3583 own.60e06a7254a18261

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