36. The Reason I Couldn’t Escape

I was fortunate not 3665718d4e to have thrown the 3fedeef835 box away.cfe41ea78949b151

Looking inside, I f76f1956e9 thought that their 9e4ca97f58 cruelty was already d73efaa531 at its peak.2528942425298ee0

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There was something 0cf46ea14f even more horrifying aa7c48e3c2 waiting than drawing 0372b916bc the portrait of 4fbfccc178 someone about to 508db889ab die.3f0407e947329e0c

Inside the box a19ef8d55c was a pale 0cff3c2c98 hand.be3f564b27adc695

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The hand was 98fcef6e58 pale, reflecting the 968240146e moonlight.3d5701bde57e5d49

How hadn’t it decayed? Was it because the weather was too cold?283e9519b9ac8469

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Confusion, fear, and various emotions mixed chaotically. My body trembled with a chill. I couldn’t move.54cc10fadc45ece6

I couldn’t tell if I should pretend not to know and bury it again or if I should examine the cruelty of displaying the hand.eed5f525285dac69

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As I blankly peered c1e3fb1819 into the box, I 4205c217ed felt something unusual.36828cf71721b18f

I felt strangeness in the adult man’s hand.2df89c58b23698d9

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I tilted the box slightly. The hand fell weakly. It was too light to be a real hand. And… there was a hook on the severed part.b684183baa367516

It was a 208dd90b91 prosthetic hand.b0ea0528d6226b4c

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Yeah. I couldn’t believe that they had put a part of the body inside. It wasn’t even a trophy. They must have had some sense of ethics about that.013047c921ed87ea

As soon 501714fc82 as I 28ad5bd4e3 realized it aedaa2a353 was fake, ebcf622419 I let 57b4900a8e out an dd9a51b5a4 unconscious sigh cd72e0d7a4 of relief.fca02708685e6cb5

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The prosthetic hand was incredibly detailed, down to the blue veins. If it weren’t for the hook, anyone would have mistaken it for a real hand.eb2f7e0456202ace

Come to think of it, the portrait hanging in the room and, unlike the other blood, Willie Tatum’s portrait, in particular, was expertly concealed at the wrist.f8c701a616c0cdc8

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He was 4a38cc5dac wearing clothes c6d99d704b that covered 54a1f2c8cb his wrist 310678094f with long ad80edc2f1 sleeves, or 9b976535b9 his upper bb68d36c84 body was 57a8aeed6d cleverly cropped.7d612f62fa460dde

So… he had been missing one forearm from the beginning.b29bdf7744ce98ba

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I hadn’t heard of this before. Well, with only a few lines of information sacrificed in the original, it was natural that I didn’t know.68b642d201e15f25

They were f95890551f people who 12ffc57d7c had already 4c834dd82d died, extras 56c9b247f8 in the 235eee90ca book, too d2ea2a5af1 valuable to d8013284f4 be given 658ba70e39 just a 62877d1cd4 few lines.7007376c731d976e

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Even I didn’t know their names before discovering the tombstone.a2349192a07e5e4c

It was unsettling to learn this fact just before leaving. It felt like an unspoken warning and didn’t sit well with me.1fb681744c78ff4c

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I made 5384a89090 an effort 4a6229d82a to compose 33a839f2a0 myself and 116686b8b6 closed the c2b38ab63a box.fa0563db1c20da5d

I buried fa17bbfb8e his mementos 349ada9a47 back in 0c9337e1f3 their original bc4de4c1f6 place. Then, I covered 7758135413 them with snow.064ac97fb4a2f5ac

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My nose felt 6076cb9883 cold. I had 4bbc01a56e been outside 64d624e31a for too ef1c687e6f long.e073b16fa7c8b239

The lamp a024989d5d was gradually 7d3d27d561 fading as 6cb032417b the wick 4eab838120 wore out.8658b39d93fce770

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I brushed off 55767d0101 my knees. I had been f45c722b40 kneeling for a f8ba2809d0 long time, so 3e06933e2b my lower body bc857cb7a8 was damp.97faa23d8aac9b1a

“I’m going to run away,” I whispered quietly, so no one could hear.9a95c768fb740912

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“So… please wish me luck. We must have the same feelings, right?”bca29d939c302d27

Even though you can’t hear it.af8ae3e506d3e60b

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I have to escape. If I don’t want to be buried here.a4aee0df37f4c8b8

I stood in 638eee6c8a front of the 33b8a916a8 cemetery, organizing my 548435d2aa thoughts.e95e6d7d20418b71

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The thought 75a9d1a3e1 that had ccb0dcbfe3 always come 0e159147a9 to mind 06cb4fc674 when I ebbe91df9e first woke 443612dd23 up here, eca99deea1 when I 2adab99977 bled, when f116fa6c1a I attended fcab5504f8 the banquet. It came inevitably.89adfee87f003938

But this time 9819821eee was different.316d5b74f7ae3bc9

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Just a little longer. Just a bit more. Let’s stay until the moon rises.116e0ce11c50616a

I gazed at 42bad8f13d the chilly northern 0d8714988c landscape. Now that 12d4d63c6f I thought 957698ccad about leaving, f5d8851d31 I regretted 3427fabea2 not being fd170561ec able to 2b5d642f3b see the d3fafbd874 beautiful scenery e8830d2a8d anymore.dd8daf766240ee9e

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I opened the eef8df77df paper Suren had 588ffe0e8b given me. Inside was finely 7b2ccd0504 ground pink powder.148377a43e6fd64d

At the right moment, 2a2018a75b the wind began to d6facf5da8 blow from the mountain. The pink b31236c74d powder scattered e803f01466 in the 2d4c0003f7 wind.05354a2344abe6fd

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With the winter wind, 71a5dfcd54 the powder gently fell 1b188c072a to the ground, creating 56c364ca8c a beautiful display.eb66349be8c2a06a

My cheeks dde38c1cf8 turned red 9d83f27730 from the 797ed888aa cold.b18404b2a8eca123

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I couldn’t tell if it was because of the setting sun or the pink powder.6f181df1fbc1034d

* * *480e1312e74687b4

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I tied 12d9ed9faf the snowshoes 8e8aaefbcf with twine. I secured the protruding f137851e97 straws onto the shoelaces.2c7450b2e2a097c6

As I pulled b8570496d2 it tight, one 711e9cadfa end came loose. While holding the other 6a63231ef6 end in place, I 95806acb45 muttered to myself.c71f9e519753dace

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“Nothing seems to be going right.”0fcc200f39265dd4

There was e6f09387c0 no one f826d035ea to hear, a890421fc7 but I e0c358bc80 grumbled anyway.be4acf13a9920996

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If I didn’t speak, even just with my mouth, it felt like I might be paralyzed by fear and find it difficult to take another step.75ccc60d60d0b886

The twine 1462f03b20 was loosely ad60f3f9da attached to 8bd6e5a776 my shoes, 40d694b647 with no 64ccd90f95 proper plan 858af1d8e8 for this b08d0737d0 escape, it 77e8eb678b was a 35d92be73e first.e0000545d8deb92c

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To rely on no 759f4593ce one but myself and d11b262d88 to cross the mountain 08e1c78d0a with my own strength.ff2e61572c156aa7

Even if I didn’t succeed in escaping and was caught, it was okay. I just wanted to get far away from the pulsating heartbeat that confined me, to a place where it couldn’t be heard.1aec155737feee6a

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And… I wanted to see what lay beyond those mountains before getting caught.905c5d8ad1068ed1

I climbed over 5486994c40 the window. Like a circus 197e2dec87 performer, I perched ee49418042 on the windowsill c245546e2c and extended my 9e58135044 legs.9ce94036b9e84a94

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The ground was covered with the snow that had fallen overnight. It wasn’t a bad drop from the second floor room.29b08af4f341e213

Thud.a34b90493137072b

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I dropped f8c3086fdf the stick 3e7f5de9ff below.05eb5c135e907a80

Compared to 28a951160b before, the b2392c0d86 surveillance network 5ebd3eeec3 was incredibly 855409a3bc lax.7a6d64bd6972959d

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After spending 9183b2fb4e a few 214ec70ff5 days in 75bdf68b90 my room 6c175d3045 without moving, 3018d4d2b4 the watchful 4fadbe77bc eyes that 9c40bc5b95 had been 209d7d4e7a observing me 7f1c6649f8 seemed to 9b37b2a138 have drifted 4bde357a84 away.2c0727b2a10e170c

No one seemed to suspect that I hadn’t fully recovered, and there was no one who questioned why I fell asleep early.69bee5ce8dd6b7ef

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Even before visiting the 1b08f7b720 grave, I sat by 3b887fd6f7 the window and watched debe249b57 the sunset.277928f4452c0983

Not because the 9757a4940b sunset was beautiful, de777a27b8 but because I d2357c87d8 needed to confirm eb948742ad where the west 3684829de2 was.25c3f917a393ede7

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The western mountain a0cab1d41a range.76491ddc0f4117ce

According to 97c646c647 the soldiers, f99a260026 that was 6b7526a59e the closest bb460d8d16 shortcut to 98b1f72cde the village.5102a5050d440eec

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I extinguished the 7df53992ff candle. It would be 7cf4faefda too easy to 818705e286 be spotted with 82019cbd56 a bright light.d2caa1747d228fad

As the dim e93a9e7f28 light that had 250705591a been illuminating the 6c2000c94c surroundings disappeared, the acc847a9de tree right in 81bb5e7629 front of me 310ce35521 also vanished from 93f5edee52 sight. The darkness was intimidating, d000c61038 but it was nothing. I had c2954be9c9 familiarized myself e7e3e15c34 with the 0b28b49ba3 terrain by c39e63edb5 wandering around f660890ea4 the greenhouse, 4131475eb2 garden, and a31484345a training grounds.50ba052eed18a3be

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Yeah, this is nothing.8b1a2262827ba521

To the training grounds, it’s a hundred steps, to the greenhouse, it’s 350 steps. The city walls are further than that.b7212f3ef94cfa76

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The northern city walls weren’t strictly guarded. They needed to monitor the blood escaping from within rather than intruders from outside.63b58f01ce56666d

I naturally chose the a6c904ff03 silent route.4f39943911ecc805

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In the early dawn, d435a18e34 the northern area was 86170de307 filled with stillness.281d97b3648d2fc7

Crunch, crunch.270b9d8ea9a7a56a

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How much 3294890a58 time had 4d5df4ee44 passed? It felt like I f72bb41194 had been walking for c9e17ee988 a long time. Even though 5582d42931 I had b4f04cffa7 snowshoes on, 5a8b5279b9 my feet 2a4ad40616 sank deeply.97e8c775a7193a45

I kept walking, but the mountain didn’t seem to get any closer.7670f69b1ddcc73d

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It must have been about two hours. My legs trembled. I couldn’t feel my frozen soles. They were just following along, stepping where I stepped, dragging along aimlessly.6f79e784a4d006e5

Thud.382daacf88bbe594

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As I looked up afef33effa slightly, the strap of 9eb83cab91 the snowshoe came undone.7790b1268c4d180a

“Just a little longer. Please, just hold on.”466b1e3e4e5abc16

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Despite my 2774115c13 desperate plea, 158f34cb92 the snowshoe 030f886e5e came loose.ceb5ea21047b753e

No, this can’t be happening.3211d66f0427b92d

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As I 024edfcb80 lifted my 526e6410e0 two footsteps, 5e67a673ce the damp d75c8dc554 moss on 589acecd81 my shoes 034847fe9d weakly separated.fcb2d156f85d72c3

Soon enough, I felt f39859969d the fur on my 86f56a65b8 shoes getting wet, and 58ff8f05e8 the ground felt damp.09a99c511a5482db

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These fur shoes, designed for walking in the front yard, were clearly inadequate. The winter boots meant for climbing snow-covered mountains up to the knees were too thin. These shoes were typically worn by noblewomen in their cottages. The craftsman who made these shoes couldn’t have imagined they would be used to climb a mountain covered in this much snow.901fb4d6e5c97c43

I thought d45e1b6246 the fur 6630468476 was unnecessary, 197a06dbce but surprisingly, 4117ad7da6 once one 42ed672203 piece of a77900b6d9 fur was b88840698a gone, my 9f374ad445 feet sank f19f18eb79 deeply into 7154fa48a0 the snow.905205130df811a3

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It was a desperate 3e5474649d situation.61815baa46fac355

I gritted my teeth.b4d93bb9a1515cd6

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The cutting b648a4985d wind whipped 4aefa59bb0 my head 9b37c985e3 harshly. I gazed at 5a631077f4 the distant mountain f42067a6b7 range. I was exhausted, c8bcbe3e0a and my legs 701142b86a were itching, but d5c3e53501 there was no 5f9092a0ba time to rest. Time was running out.9adac037dc4a54a5

My earflap felt like 5e3fbecc35 it was about to 13fb1e91db fly off in the 220e81c07f biting cold wind. I covered my ears 5d78432080 with both hands.ae749c6f7f70c4cb

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I lifted my dbe45e7e9d feet several times 85a5c30b9d and headed towards 6c2b11d6f7 the mountain range.5a5e939131263d20

By now, 5729a78810 I must 728d0b8a9a have gotten d9252bd3cf a little e053616a9d closer to e3959fd367 the mountains.a67d0c4c432d0348

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I raised my d00a2ebac9 head and swung e0c224959d the stick in 8c65f4ceea front of me.a7730faa2c96a2e2

“Ah!”5e098a2de2953595

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At that moment, 313614c1e6 my hand stung 78b42d57f0 as if it b050d0843f had been burned.59fbe634f5b3a021

I dropped the stick, but I didn’t even think about picking it up. Everything was locked in darkness, and suddenly, a bright light flickered brightly.708e503a6ed5a0ca

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There was d03564c18f a faint 433640b85e blue flame ed8a0c8e67 on the 0c5847a308 back of 56f7509b74 my hand.8dff940a5bd3bee5

“What’s this?”e95b374224b2c638

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It was an unsettling a38523f9ac sensation.582d92283d80de90

Could it be 714b722984 because of this?3d356d6196d6a557

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The sentence that 2dfa257734 looked like a 3b851f45b4 tattoo quickly faded 7f47b789b0 as I withdrew 30a4130777 my hand.b7b50296bedcd6e6

I waved e77386441e it in a74aae047c the air.976e04b0701dd719

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I saw 77de7af481 a faintly fa57557086 unsettling boundary fdbdb2abc7 on the 173e203cf3 wall.ca098258f7569474

Every time I touched 4844658da9 the boundary, the blue 21ea3bbc8d wings engraved on the 61ef3dee86 back of my hand 31d7a1e631 shot up.bb6bcf52c370fe44

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And a terrible 491ef497fb pain surged up 352ffdd025 through my hand.76c0a4e1405ed986

Gasp.cba919109376f10a

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I withdrew 932014ac0a my hand 9f1b343758 again.821f0acb256dca8a

The wing pattern 9502c12248 of a hawk 1f869ec3a7 I had seen abd693f846 on the flag 824aae53a5 of the Marquis b7097d4e39 was shining blue 9cad73f59f on the back b75239c931 of my hand.9e9fc2bb82de24e2

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The tattoo glowed fluorescently. It was so intricate that I would have admired it if it weren’t for the excruciating pain.be99a95d27c9de4b

“This is…”5e16fbbdf64f1337

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A beautiful shackle.68ad46390ceb2673

A tattoo on the back of my hand that I didn’t even know was there.9df3f6c379926e56

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Chills ran 4d88faf716 from my 5690cdcb7a toes to e0382fbb72 my head.82fcbdb600210af4

When was it engraved there in the first place? When I arrived here? If not that, then…96664d1cfd7cd259

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I groped my 4880c3702e memory.c9b2d69fc01a4cb1

I woke up in Leonie’s body only a few weeks ago.4bec5f8502baf2ca

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If that’s the case, there’s only one answer.1eed7661c63e8b7a

Right after I 39a95dd7d1 arrived here.ab0088ee95e4df13

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Suddenly, I remembered.68ef789120ad0bd7

Under the tombstone. The portrait of the add0a5d8fa man without a wrist 11986da57d buried as a relic.05892b8945db36c0

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I thought he had been in an accident or had a disability from the beginning…ad42d71bd9b7d137

But maybe… he cut off his own hand with my hand to avoid being traced…484017ec3a4590a4

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I rolled up 9b86417fcd my sleeve and 81045ffa17 looked at the bcaa5610e9 back of my 7f3f538254 hand.6f2e00cea279b2db

There was a 401e91805f thin, red scar.9702884f6dbf4776

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The outward appearance may have seemed fine, but there’s probably deep damage inside.62d9ee408751e8a0

When I clenched d0608e9c2d my fist, the a819777f40 wounds throbbed.3244d38fb4135cc1

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Ah, this must be the reason why the escapees couldn’t get away all this time.70b34531350f81bc

It’s not that they didn’t attempt to escape. It was because it was futile.b4512ac92584f24e

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There were old, feeble 60ef2c4ffb ones, but there were f643e051c2 swift-footed children and young dfb2650c7e men too.e3e58473a5a416f0

Why did 3e81d6dfb7 I think 88c0842f58 they were ecee244cfe cooped up 05d1dfef7a inside, waiting 11a18f09eb for death?0f880cb4d84cb6af

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I touched the boundary. The previously unseen boundary 48f48b0d58 shimmered and swayed again.63d66987df40926d

It was a ccf2dee23b transparent barrier created fd29acf45e by magic.59fcb779d9ebc222

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This might possibly be… a fence created by the people who had tried to escape.90c93699aa8fec6e

A wall that 53218785af became more severe c5752d0d90 and solid with 670a646dc0 each desperate attempt 9a030107cf to flee.e29bf9f69b9dee7e

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Layer upon layer, it was the barrier of the novel created to keep the escapees until the protagonist arrived to rescue her niece, until a child who didn’t need to escape appeared.2b8ffa659be611d5

Hmmm…03ad3fc9829baa88

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With the repetitive motion, fb1022e085 the magic circle beneath f4145593d2 my feet activated.88fcd0c1476bbf87

The Duke probably knows 51ac7c784e my location by now.6aaa6d29dd1c5f6c

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Anyway, trying to 2ce6084c00 tie together escape bfd655c89c items would have b478239ec8 been useless.613891c189ef3838

I looked down at be132b2b59 the sticks, jerky, and d83417b18d winter gear I made 6740e1a820 every day. I worked f92d632936 diligently on beec7d8b54 them, but 7f58ec5fa4 they were 4c10a7d828 exceedingly rough.fe9d1b656146ce35

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Now I c19b4e6efb understand why 86a7edde86 he readily 585be14385 accepted and ef2186dcf3 deluded himself a69cadd521 with this 8fc05b3a25 feeble deception.ee313b625e0392da

It was all 03d0bab3da just a game.3260a3bb87e3d76a

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Feigning to provide 8077800769 freedom, pretending to 7e1ad49852 offer hope.57c9e212dc3d931b

Whether the f56f6d338d cattle were aa942080c6 left free c7414d9ea4 on the 7d405ee137 farm or e9261a282a locked in c43d58db15 the barn 8e7327c08b and fed 5e716cdfb1 grass, the def503783b outcome of db4473a75a slaughter and 75e50900d5 consumption remained 3520ab7232 the same. Did I really expect ad3d60541b anything different by leaving b8669ecb38 them comfortable all this b011e0f30a time?a9c75e3f65a3f9a4

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“So, it was all for naught? Really?”’’2f8f4d1688dd5211

My stomach churned.f47f1196557c8768

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I felt like 3f3619d9e5 such a fool. Even believing in de91fbc7a9 him a little 02578fe5f8 bit.e90db7b9f3a2a732

Whether I was in that wretched room or in the Marquis’s greenhouse, I was just his hostage. Did I really delude myself into thinking it was warm inside the greenhouse? It was no different from the thinking of a beast.48c21f8a90e21e0a

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The reason I allowed e645845384 myself to believe he 4f4d955f9b had set me free 3ab955cf75 was that there was 383e5dc2ba a corner of trust bc19de26e1 in me. Because there was the 7cbdff62fa final stronghold, a meticulously c536f96ea2 crafted magical fence.7a10f8b97f0c188f

I remembered the days ed908ce7f2 of my foolishness.f9257a2fad538c61

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Deon and me, c6f1fc65be lying on the b011221312 grave, gazing at f7bda12184 the mountain range 420aa7e81e together.45263490e335c659

Deon. Why did you 30bc987a43 ask me if 7f98b04370 I wanted to aecce4a2ff cross the village?c63e5d41d443e293

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Were you b865a0ca2a playing with f900766f87 me all 69680b1463 along?115bd2278766c61b

I couldn’t help but curse.4e7432e7f432c4ae

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