34. Drinking Poison

Noble people often say they don’t use excessive seasonings to conceal the taste of poison.59815fc804f61706

But what if fd88ab1c17 all that excessive eb58e1bb4d sugar was meant 3ed4d41a13 to mask the 712f8342c8 poison?6f983294111e6d01

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My heart began f755228478 to race.10b1d73f33ed00e3

And a wicked thought 28bc2ab04a crept into the corner 403f3bf0e9 of my mind.f286794a34a136c8

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If I just pretend not to know…b8a599a51af651e6

‘I’m not at fault. I didn’t poison it. No one will know. If I’m the only one who keeps my mouth shut…’9dddb5a7c4c41721

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I tightly closed 41e830ede1 my eyes. It was terrifying.7af64b1a3b975251

Perhaps, neither choice ea4023dec0 would lead to 0552904f06 a happy ending.cdd477f5fd8bce98

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Four spoons, 91b40b3f9c five spoons.87b2482309f3e810

With each 61126b5c13 spoonful of 0c69d2fbc4 sugar Suren 29b4c24d41 poured into ff5e9555eb the sugar 2abc1ee221 container, my d04fe413e1 hands trembled 7ea65d64b7 along with c60a09c917 it.87caae7d105cd45f

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I clasped my hands together. Without doing that, I couldn’t bear this trembling.58824d64e57ff6df

If I 1e81e6f3af were to 42889aec3f look in 1613b4f5d2 the mirror, 7869d7a7a0 my face 5ceef0bd33 would undoubtedly fe4bf797fe be deathly 246517cbdb pale.bbd187564940ad31

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Suren placed a cup 5469054d18 in front of Elizabeth.91228c5cc590f6fb

Elizabeth picked up 8fbc623d62 the steaming cup 29f530a5e4 of lemon tea. She gracefully efeba43100 held the d147d77c62 handle of d1d5ef80ce the teacup c9d245ddd2 with an b63f8acf1b intricate floral 8e850df609 pattern.78091622a4e1f707

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“Lady!”fabc15ecf2d63cd5

As Elizabeth’s lips touched the teacup, I unintentionally let out a loud cry.92412944d9137669

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“Let’s switch.”0c00df1b61ff6f56

“Huh?”4615a513c1cdb34d

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I made eye contact 1f6fb5d33f with Suren.3fc95fa7b5a03019

She bit her 7744a4cc45 lip, lowering her 0a12afb254 head slightly.40359f59556120bf

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The expression “don’t say another word, save your words” was meant to stop speaking further, but I deliberately ignored it.760d60c2f104f9aa

“I… I suddenly felt like having lemon tea.”bbe0ea9ddb90f5e0

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“Suddenly? Just a moment ago, you said you wanted coffee…”acd26e5b3a4b99c5

“I thought about it, and lemon tea sounds more appealing.”19fad9eecbd1f70d

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I knew that coffee wasn’t a suitable beverage for a pregnant woman, but I was too distracted.ea29244214050444

I had to stop edba9c5ee5 her from putting the b945e561bd teacup to her lips, 047ee1741a no matter what.b4c5331c5108e676

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She tilted her head.bfcaf8d4591b4abe

Then she bde5d39505 turned her 00a3a39b62 head towards ce473013b0 Suren.76db8b4c2c714a99

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“Did you say your name was Suren? Would you like to serve me some fresh tea?”eb3fb3539f5a9b91

“No. Lady Elizabeth! I’m satisfied with this tea. Is there any need to go through the trouble? It’s a waste of tea leaves… We should save them.”b3c7ba4896767be4

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“What?”e9d766fb54a677a0

She paused for 7517d28241 a moment, her 1a7ca2ac3c hand outstretched to c609d9b340 call Suren. Then, she turned the 5d14b1638f handle and extended the 5b45e8627f teacup towards me.5e495c4b7bd3ca59

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“Would you be okay with this?”b2030f26101a8f39

“Yes. Thank you…”33076bf93bc3f50e

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I picked up the 16ac9266da teacup with trembling hands.2127bf9a91e18697

It was still hot, 4219976d68 with steam rising from 3b819d8dfd it.9dafdf35188e1e0b

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As I brought cdd2ece918 my face closer 01b81b3512 to the teacup, b435ddb034 a refreshing lemon c2a16744d5 scent wafted out.113e5ce0b652db2a

It was too 81a063014e sweet-smelling to be 5a44e7cdf2 considered poison.a79aa331d62b0bcd

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As I 52c15eeeed hesitated to cd049da6e0 put it 0e9a1602b2 to my 54d11a1a5b lips, Elizabeth ab3c6caf1b spoke.ca8b39650ca8e140

“Leonie, it seems like I should be the one drinking this tea.”f2ce146a1a45169b

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I stared at the c88ba259c5 teacup I was holding, a3ba429754 without realizing it, and d307977103 wondered why she was 15884fe498 so fixated on lemon 2c9f2635dd tea.5b59a530af7b93bd

Still, it was too 66c1fc421f risky to ask Suren 2788b7cab0 to bring a new 0dd22335b0 cup of tea. What if add98c1d61 the powder 0a7732930e was already b8d3e6f837 in another 925945816f teacup? But if I 95d026b06b sent Suren away de386d3386 now and called a10021b95c another servant, it 4dfe0ca412 would only raise 9bd71baf34 more suspicion.7047f983bc73cc2a

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“In our hometown, we never waste a single leaf of tea, so it has become a habit. If you don’t want coffee, I’ll drink both.”a3f9d96c274bc6b0

I pulled 4b2f7b82fc the teacup 4737f00f10 from the 2adc06b477 opposite side 77fcc70316 toward me, 18a17f2909 and some e9a4052330 coffee splashed 9b2da3e18d onto my 6dd6d2bcb6 wrist.5cdfc7cb08ddc271

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Elizabeth, who had 433cb3bb05 been hesitating, had 6eac576df9 a troubled expression 8695da48e7 on her face.83cf2641e29584e8

She stammered, “I asked for a lot of sugar, so it might be too sweet. Would it be okay? It might be better to make a fresh one…”98628b6062e0397f

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“What?”c18b04539fc4a93c

“Lately, I’ve developed a taste for putting a lot of sugar in my tea because I’ve had cravings. It might not suit your taste, Leonie.”b63424c1ce3ad997

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I pondered 8174708782 her words 34e83d3d34 for a bd3b262bf3 moment, then 10a61ad4a1 looked at dccfd42bbf Suren.677b13b086be30d6

Suren, her hand on d11d8cda50 her waist, was staring ba9feec2c3 at me with an c8d9387d83 inscrutable expression.939400513b7bdfeb

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* * *e271f9ea8d17efec

“Did you take me for a servant who would add poison without the master’s permission? Is this your proposal after a few days?”3b8745da9e5bf869

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Suren, who had b938593a79 closed the door, 2618211097 finally spoke.3801ead2819b571e

Her anger hadn’t subsided, and her expression remained stubborn.d47e8e637075b1ea

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I wanted to deny it, but judging by the way she snatched Elizabeth’s teacup, it seemed she wouldn’t believe me.b672cbe692cc43e8

I felt uneasy. I had started to doubt Suren without reason, even considering harming the master’s child in a brief moment of suspicion.3b6955ae21367abb

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“It’s not like that at all. I was just a little surprised to see you taking charge of the snacks when it’s not usually your responsibility.”c059003cd88d4068

“The kitchen maid who was in charge of the kitchen work had an upset stomach, so I was assisting her. Since making tea ultimately involves serving you, I volunteered.”cb5d4faccff7088a

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“That’s not all… It was different when you poured the tea compared to the other maids.”d89c0d8de96754ef

“That’s because I’ve never been in charge of kitchen work before, so I was inexperienced. I forgot to pour out the first infusion.”adf610681839fb2f

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Suren sighed deeply.cf4efed9989f173a

“To be honest, I want to do that. I want to do something to the tea cup from my heart. It would be nice if Young Lady acted determined and selfish, but she’s not that kind of person, so I guess I can comfortably serve her.”fc48ac2d6cc09a3b

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Suren fidgeted with her 87749a12cd hands.a8e87712e634a50a

“Do you really have no intention of changing your mind?”26f05c664a538855

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I shook 633487f728 my head d16be2747a in response 7fc4b8dac7 to her abccdef286 question.1817866efff476b0

“…No.”7d0798269ea0e787

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I said I didn’t, but was it really true? My voice sounded unsure, as if I lacked confidence.d325eacfc68eb268

“Suren, it’s just words… Can you show it to me?”5a9509aa224043fd

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I wanted to 3e08270605 at least confirm 7c95edd839 what the medicine 7baa4f14c6 looked like.786eb7a4473430de

Suren, as 312e66b4d6 if waiting, 318c60bccb took out ae36779633 a small 6abda85652 stack of fd71a75354 paper from 6059f25af7 under the 8d072b0812 drawer.d10a90b3e86d5aa3

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It was 5a273c6420 a tiny 46502a6191 note folded 385a76b094 with a 640403e33f red string.68e9a9500555c069

When I 85778d9c34 unfolded the 8eebc15c5d note, I f0674810c7 saw finely 758317d165 crushed pink 49ee1f5db9 powder neatly 0cbf3ef77d folded inside.8dd68fd1a225176c

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Contrary to what cd26af8bc1 I had thought, 39a58417f6 it was not fdef3f7725 a cleanly refined 06d7f0772a white, but a b534ad744e beautiful shade of 39bda3cec9 pink.5004859cef33c2ed

It was so 56fc56eaae fine and pretty ad6f32a1a4 that it almost b805de6627 seemed like it 3761293218 could easily tempt 08a502afd6 people and emit 1d732380ab fragrance, like a 02efbbb713 poisonous mushroom.8083f723325a6af1

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It was so beautiful 62a62cfb08 that anyone would readily 8fe6112a11 taste it if told 7b033ab782 it was good for d56fc2a1b7 the body.3d2cbcda6403591b

I wrapped the paper 51e38f9462 again with the string.c88ec051a91e8fde

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“You can keep it.”5fa330df16163324

When I tried to 7dd94bf5a0 give it back, she 30cafbc651 put the paper back af2630e12a into my hand and 23ec73c2bf held onto it tightly.abb6a922bf3c59c8

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“You might need it. Use it when you need to.”3790f4265d442f15

There’s no way.adb3dce3dacb1a80

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That would be the e34a44c356 time when I truly 0035475fa0 let go of myself.f2bb92434848b6e2

I knew how much 00e1f04bd3 she wanted and cherished 48548ae4da her child. How could I make 03177dd734 such a choice?6ccbd533076ad7b1

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Besides, I was the child’s surrogate mother. To think that the mother would try to kill her own child before it was even born. It was too tragic.c5703e8b212aceef

Suren seemed to sense my mixed emotions and said, “Nobles easily dispose of anything that gets in their way on their path without a second thought. They hire reliable servants and give orders instead because they don’t want to dirty their own hands. But Young Lady seems different from other nobles.”2aea6fe05e228fc3

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I chuckled at her words. “Maybe it’s because she’s just a pretentious noble.”538e0c46349df4a2

Suren firmly 710d15de96 handed me 99e1f22c6c the poison.e82c15470e15a055

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Unable to d056f48731 leave it ae269e4c1c in the 2403e46207 room, I 1ec9cfc2ff decided to 509daae3bf hide it 1cf27420a2 in the b042eaba14 secluded space c909aaff1a next to 3de589ef72 the guest 4055056bfd room.3dcb831fefea232f

Next to the room ba4d686482 was a dead-end corridor 8d519d9b1f with a locked drawer. However, the 1200e25526 old latch 3ff5f412b0 could easily 826e18df79 be released 6222e994de with a 46b35ef2e5 few pulls. It was a b62ee6b8c5 drawer I had 92b971518c discovered when I 26f3ca2ed7 explored the mansion ac7c40a75d in search of c8360adfb1 hiding places for 7534c4d518 contraband items.66b90401c7dcc408

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The drawer ee24b52592 was filled a1862f99bd with nothing a05faad9a6 but trivial 74d3f37f48 items – 8bce200b53 a small 28d841440a flute, colored 82ff440069 paper, a deb2d8ca6b brush. Inconsistently assorted and haphazardly 556d0319af placed.31b052adc5206ca3

At first, I thought 1cc9dfd612 it might be items 77c1c566c3 left behind by the 425d208096 maids or things left 5c28931a66 behind by external guests.92a72f672e1e87ba

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But it wasn’t until I saw a small frame that I realized. Those were relics left behind by the previous generation of the nobility who had come as guests.02cc0d590ebebbce

People who had died b17a506b08 as guests of the 72c0c6441d Duchy. Their only traces.b0ba80410484286a

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The childish items were toys to alleviate the boredom of the Marquis’s dull mansion.e670467610300d5c

Beneath the items, there 08d9fbbe50 was a portrait of 15e6b375b9 a man. You could tell from bddea1fa59 the frame that it 8b3d2077d4 had hung in the 3f7206326c same room as mine.1f103b53163b759a

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A young man fe15976e5a with red hair, d11a287d29 probably in his c1d9beac42 late twenties. His subtly fbe84694e7 curled lips 14fec9774f caught my ccb1897cc6 eye. He wore b84422a3b3 a suit c5001c2edd and looked 95a0c4d091 straight ahead. Only his upper 0bf549c361 body was depicted 50954925b5 in the painting.44dfde7074a16c03

Why did Deon not 2bb107447c instruct them to paint 565a82d0d9 my portrait? Did he think I eb74578348 would live for a baddd621ee long time?57257dcc04cd8952

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I bit my lip. No matter what I became, he wouldn’t get to see my face.6ce1be66786e93cd

* * *3a855a6f5e2b7835

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I walked b6a7680c9d through the 435175d601 garden. I had thought d181a4007f of visiting the dc2ce28f11 greenhouse after a 5bd7c3ed72 long time. Without proper maintenance, the efcc5455d2 vines quickly overgrow.98f4d077728e6c34

I hadn’t been taking care of the greenhouse for a while, so one side of the transparent greenhouse was already overgrown with remnants. It was so thick that I couldn’t see inside.ae7c43f198fca64f

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When I turned a54dd3ab22 to the familiar eb8dbc19b5 path, a soldier e2a2cffc25 blocked my way.c5bbd456abad3957

“It might be better to take a different route today.”2c15a236bc842965

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The garden behind 9e4155bdd1 him was noisy.9429d9c4e6324314

“What are you doing?”68eb6c6be45e26ea

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“We’re doing maintenance and construction.”a3f48258f1ae3158

The soldiers were carving a644d31cbf stones.90d2e20529269c4e

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Shovels, pickaxes, 812f23e440 and chisels. Each of them was 56342b0768 surrounding a stone and 5a5e4de718 creating something.81d76ef8c8fb8a57

“Can I watch for a moment?”fb08930f0df42e2b

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As I tried b25710004a to move, he 456fe67cb0 blocked my way c0eeb45970 again.a617b3f56e3190f5

“It’s not something Young Lady should see. There’s nothing particularly interesting.”acf4bf2ceed67297

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He blocked my way so persistently, as if he had witnessed something that shouldn’t be seen. It seemed like he was waiting for me to turn back quietly.c35ad8dd03a3c0ec

Meanwhile, the stones 8c2ec2aa86 became thinner, and f8691fa3f1 the chunks at 5d8cb31107 the edges fell 0181353b3f away.4f806ac2aabbf9b5

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The stones the ad24171045 soldiers were carving d1f550a2a3 gradually became rounder cf9617d19e in shape.613edc68e17218b0

Round, even rounder.87e78d135856872a

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They solidified in 0502264b20 place.652f230f0ec9b599

Naturally, the same-sized 8d49cd9c9e gravestones I had d131612f45 seen at the 7ebd251796 cemetery, and a 77205350cf stone of just 2237f08f2d the right size 651238a345 to place in 62e4622018 front of the 2d607daa17 last grave.663c4cf1df517bef

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The sculptor 7e1cf47eb6 was carving 2106352713 letters on 9b46ea056b the front 7984575b0e of the de97d7fd6e stone.7b659659884b2676

Although it was hidden 4af440f8fb by his back, I 2870c57da4 wondered if my name 06691d1de6 and year of birth 7e2291051e were engraved on that 1353b6b9c5 stone.61165fc426d6712d

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The more 0088693eda I thought a19dadddb6 about it, 9efa714136 the more 937e304876 certain I cd1434087a became. Suddenly, Young Lady’s b067e0ed6b I felt afraid.fe541c3d78bc5a06

My death had been f105e4070a slowly and steadily prepared effcaf975c without my knowledge.4e9fa69e2fc2f3d6

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“In fact, His Grace instructed the Young Ladies to prevent from approaching if they come here.”f0f8b71d9e72ffb3

A young soldier hesitated 2752c06ec1 as he spoke. His words c7999765ba were just 36859e2c23 as confirming a21b7f67de as an 781d582b48 execution order.f77d6ef5659a3a2c

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“Why… why are you carving the stones?”a63ca6fcf3ac0542

I pushed ed1299c0c9 the man 596b8dff86 blocking my 2532e509c2 way. His hand held a 0eccbe0fa7 firm armor.1a6d517971c673e1

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“Yes? Young Lady, please wait.”9aa7e2e47b1b5d55

“Just step aside for a moment.”5de37115cbe33b82

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“I…”16d61f56bf22650b

He looked very uncomfortable. He couldn’t touch my body and was blocking me with his entire body.a498fdda0e4be8f3

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If it had 921f9ed707 been in the 30481a8079 past, if a 5fa19dac6f young boy soldier 14e0ac2e41 had spoken like 3d1ae5f675 this, he would bda9f3a22b have stepped aside.ac3456be1c07dbc9

“Hurry. Move aside.”c8ba5fcb0c22b24d

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My voice quivered. There was c4d88a6564 moisture at efc59294bd the corner 87cf263332 of my cdd6003ca9 eye.d7123782218fd921