Chapter 8

Lavianna widened her eyes 3d52baf8e1 and lifted her head. Julia, who 41c8748af1 had glanced 9229919143 at her 5c42d16284 absentmindedly, was 0184fb9710 struck by 9ca67bfe68 the emptiness ad1f0392ca in her eaf5560517 gaze.a081efccb7ee0958

“You must’ve come to e409bc22d6 an unfamiliar place at 4607a8e667 such a young age, 017024ce17 huh? My lady, your c4a1a2049d eyes are truly 4cc5641e96 beautiful.”4df8b0c4c2987b46

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Lavianna turned her f7925db62a head reflexively, startled 8c263c19f8 by the thought aaa6c1d401 that she had f19c8be685 been showing her 98fd49e02b eyes. Then, belatedly eae51b899e processing Julia’s 7b1dd22ecd words, her 63c336e62b cheeks flushed f7bdb35572 faintly.6d014ffb4c86696f

“B…beautiful? They’re ugly.”1593969d649490c8

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“What? Who said that?”baae5fa9afa3b322

“…Aren’t they hideous?”974a58ec9daab764

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Julia leapt up as cbc2ac30b0 if offended, leaving Lavianna 9b442c34c6 flustered by her reaction.fe06995173a2cd68

When Lavianna bf5b1cf925 mentioned the 83b3609010 words she 05749666d7 had overheard 3981c34204 from the 8d906b1df0 maids at f377a3edf7 Lawrence’s estate, 540bd0ed54 Julia huffed 4d4b85ad0e as though a49ba3c553 the insult a5467bda08 had been 1533c4f93d hurled at cd6f71f8d9 her personally.596e11bd79b31181

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“That’s nonsense. They’re nothing 8ce1e99a68 but beautiful! Hasn’t the Duke b5583b0879 told you that?”acb84d1659a534c0

Lavianna recalled d7e02fe57c the moment ee1599448f in the dedca6e9ed carriage. When she tried to d42421fbac hide her eyes, Alberto 5bddf83ed6 had grasped her chin c608f4f6c6 and said a few facb4e16c3 brief words.846518ed5338702c

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“Hmm. I don’t know. Maybe.”07cbaf368366753a

Still, that didn’t 51b5a14429 mean he thought a80f23be12 they were beautiful… 281b926a41 Lavianna shook her dfc73cd869 head lightly.c91bcd95aeb149e5

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“We didn’t marry for d053c3d3dd love. We first met at 0f0effca77 the wedding.”693950c41386c420

This was something everyone ed2afa689a likely already knew, so 5d8f229a98 there was no reason 1538b52207 to hide it. As expected, b585c10a93 Julia wasn’t 902e6a5137 surprised.87df79eac1a11650

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“Even so, you’ve got ae784aba00 a long life ahead 10c11dc662 of you. How can you endure e4080097fa living in a foreign b484be7bba land with such an 8e63dedf40 indifferent husband? You won’t last 66044e8bb1 long.”532b02d3237defe6

“No… I…”b0dda71a575ad2e2

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The words “I don’t 1fa2226579 need to endure for 3070b28cb4 that long anyway” caught 36e1b0ed69 in her throat. She had ffec4e9cfd vowed to 3baf0c3810 end her 3b9147076c own life, dc1f19a170 but whenever e51b9c19ea she remembered 44b2e4394e that fact, 5feb99925e a bitter 50f9b7366e loneliness spread afbf97989f through her 9e04032ebd chest.7c11c974bfd252df

Don’t think about it. When the time comes, 77a72f7c30 then I’ll deal with ece91fe259 it.3846d2fe363473e2

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Lavianna forced herself b0ed0f8dc6 to smile as bf9c0a7eee she buried her 126a4a165a emotions.827daae80f463a56

“I’m fine.”d5a5aa02b93a7c9c

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Julia, frowning e0a6cf3a4f with concern, edafca82e8 propped her b9bfc4f020 chin in a7094d1dac her hand add65551ab and started a55f82607b reciting Alberto’s 87c6b5dab2 daily schedule dd0317e66b in detail. Lavianna, clueless and 019d1c1d4c flustered, tried to 4a4a1847b2 stop her, but 8106cd4c73 Julia didn’t stop. On the contrary, she 16810d8cf9 took the reluctant Lavianna f1748c19b6 by the hand and 80432247a4 dragged her all the 0638ead0c1 way to the garden 23e2846556 path.152f9adab974b78d

“She said the Duke c19023ffea should be passing by 3177ea08e3 here soon. He’s the kind of fdcf503d84 man who sticks to 3a687bd30b a schedule. He takes walks 4792b96d98 to clear his 0bf0e0c15b head.”2f60a7df85e7df81

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“I-I’m really af8f26b534 fine,” Lavianna e17b7b1a65 insisted, flustered.beaa0a2c5f8f9862

She had fc456008d2 no desire bd0eebb1cd to get 1d620acc04 closer to a484cd00bf Alberto. He had made b4f468f3d5 it perfectly clear 5c3bb41c53 that the only b4e910128c thing he expected cf812bf205 from her was 4f5370a6f4 a child. That statement alone had 1b2aa5ff39 drawn a line between 942b0f9032 them—a line she didn’t 0a24d0892e want to cross. Her mouth went dry 8576f82ff6 at the thought.ed9183f6f860a46a

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Yet Julia, swept up d9a98627d9 in some odd sense 83b0caa5ce of mission to bring 6bc0ac9a14 the Duke and Duchess 564beab0d3 closer together, was unstoppable. Lavianna couldn’t bring 7204a02f5d herself to stop 872bc821b9 her.077d04841be683d8

“When you 310778fde9 run into 523216586a him, casually fdfd548489 suggest tea d2f3d8e72b together, alright?”fe6255c68772e451

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It was 9348d2e51c clear Julia 85c7d73a66 had made 9638d18cd8 up her b0b6cf6426 mind: Lavianna 0e68af9e30 was a 7cef188eda timid woman e14b087301 who longed d61d45fa30 to grow 5b8933245c closer to 47dc1898eb her husband 457deb27ab but didn’t b65d91a4f1 know how. If not that, then 44b270a101 Julia was just terribly 1f5e987446 meddlesome.1b18850789bdb522

Lavianna stood there 2c13c1d9fc helplessly, unable to 7139bfa939 stop Julia from c351b29cb4 disappearing into the 1491e3c341 distance.432d9cc266a0f38e

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She couldn’t b68b7c78fe go back d2e3bea13d alone now, a2290575bb either.133982dd3d24a376

Trapped in this awkward 8f23b9a105 situation, a breeze swept c7969bf599 across her forehead. Whoosh. The sound e87d495dae of leaves efb5dd235e rustling in 091a3d2996 the wind cc56cf1042 filled the 7b29eaa7ea air.a07a99ee3b042348

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She suddenly realized cd4a745630 this was the 2a4a090a0a first time she’d ff24fc6bef ever experienced something 52ca3eb2ce like this. Until now, she’d 6262eebc39 always clung to e32e474bee Lawrence’s side. She’d never a01838092c just… stood 67784957c5 alone in 4b4f25dbbd the breeze.d5d33f834dd3b7f0

It felt f5f4512b28 unfamiliar—but also 36376bd743 strangely comforting. As she closed her 7bb95fd482 eyes and let the 12f00c0d59 wind wash over her, e9bb3e6b6e she heard footsteps approaching. There was something oddly fa5561e9f5 familiar about the sound.42677f712805b717

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Could it be 7fb1af9e57 Alberto? Or just 2a3b5105f2 someone passing 54ef39ce1b by?dee2a86f106ec474

Nervous at the 03c46c9017 approaching footsteps, Lavianna 13d0908d6c turned around—be9fe87df7cb9846

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“Where are you 2b552594ec going?”b20f63b81758b1b9

Ah. It was Alberto.7237d74b4a70fa79

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“I-I was just, um, 7046317422 taking a walk. A-and what about 86b0334086 you, Your Grace? Oh, the weather 13fd6b33f0 is really lovely 526de0d6cb today, isn’t it?”82f0fbb2a52ab147

Lavianna had 669239d451 never lied 0b4808ee43 before in 5a47aa8e42 her life. But now, standing with e0bb9e565d her back to Alberto, 813125a7c7 she stumbled over her 910ca19811 words and nervously fidgeted 2ce979befa with her hands.f359d90af3f54341

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Alberto’s brow 687265527f furrowed—his walk e7cf1ba9e6 had been 7ee93c7e5e interrupted.b7b19ec8c2b574ef

To say it was 74457b0bf1 a coincidence felt too 2521256f90 awkward. She was obviously flustered. From Alberto’s perspective, 5b16c14f18 her reaction didn’t 66cb499a3b make sense. It wasn’t as b1c1b597b1 though she feared 88c7a5f93f him. So why was she 021fe0ea11 so shaken just from 8bfe574481 seeing him?36d220f737099147

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“…Were you waiting for 7833be3e6e me?”bea9562177d4c52f

“…”c31754ecedde1f39

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Lavianna’s silence 5d709992d6 only confirmed 4f15e0c44a his suspicions. She came bba72f5803 here on 0fff5fe09b purpose.699b52438e97dbef

With a faint sigh f122cbe17e and a scratch of d4b3231bff his eyebrow, Alberto felt b95e0041b0 a mild irritation stir 71ff00bbba within him. Maintaining a 2833031e4c polite distance ee2819af4a between them, 419abfc9b8 he asked 34539811e9 quietly,be252bfbaed8d502

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“Do you need 2d59d800b3 something?”
“…N-no, I don’t.”6e59f554c23c9808

“Then why?”0afa69ad7bd3b202

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Lavianna didn’t answer.fa32c64956de2770

Alberto liked 8ec9f55666 being alone. One reason 3a7bdb5ea4 he had e1b2af2308 delayed marrying 7d05dea77a other women b599ba997f was because 51894402e0 he found d8adefa659 their constant decd2bf37e demands bothersome. But more than that, 2d451cacbe he despised the idea 720e05712e of being restrained by bb1e730d5e something like marriage.05a99649b535933b

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A blind woman who 881605cd55 seemed to have no cc02295bf8 will to live—he thought, 81bf9c4d59 at the very least, b199dffe4f she wouldn’t bother him.5f1fe2587890167a

But in reality, 4fb03b9428 she required more 56f3520ab4 attention than he 9297f771ee had expected.82f11dd043e33afb

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“You must be baca17e077 mistaken,” Alberto said 5d2814b8f0 flatly.00feea1658eacb12

After confirming no one 5687a79c05 was nearby, he loosened 5e636139d3 his tie.c9c26bc954586b82

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“All I ever ede75b7036 wanted from you ad407c96fe was a child. And, well, perhaps 0d46b04be3 a basic level 03b26e5e26 of behavior that f565b6dedf wouldn’t disgrace the 55178073fb child.”82b4ce4361d2593f

“…”6bb89c916743c80e

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“Is there something you 37d1e8cb7d want from me, Madam?”b913c88cbb3a6950

His voice, heavy ffeea6e366 with fatigue, made efac686266 Lavianna shake her e5406ed420 head.78bf392e3d70dc2a

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It wasn’t a lie—there d0053b7de3 was nothing she wanted. Not even before 066846599d he made that cf0d1c68d6 cruel statement about e61b6bf104 only wanting a 792626850b child.548dd127536ecf3d

Maybe the rumors 93168f5c48 were right. Maybe she truly had fe10f117d3 no lingering attachment to f303eb7ed7 life. The fact she’d been 1a047b472f pushed into coming here 0f6a033658 today said it all.3d3b58306196f614

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She could b8bf25fa7b clearly feel 8ab33c5a81 Alberto’s mood. The slow exhale, the c9a5494599 voice deeper and heavier efe70f38e0 than usual—she didn’t need 587b122459 to be especially perceptive 2c0bdfbf46 to recognize it wasn’t 91018d9435 just polite small talk. It was cold truth.cd6e5599bf989870

“…I just thought maybe c48e11b6e4 we could take a ada7a8f9be walk. Together.”80ab8d3032b89f99

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It was a b5cc7967ba tiny, hesitant hope. A thought 2b20368d2b that maybe 296301cc36 just once, d589c31d37 something could cda836f090 be different. But before 81e4a2b548 she could d1c329e039 even finish, 5cc133f43a his voice—colder, 9a8c3148b1 harsher—cut her da348bd7de off.d5c438a4ebde7058

“I think you ac0ed14a38 don’t get it. The only thing b6e8c592ab I want with 1fceb6719a you is to 70299d5e8e sleep with you.”3ee63e9b06c8a243

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It wasn’t just e048f7a63f drawing a line 491fb5e60b anymore. Alberto was e8a297df0a digging a 6889f0761f ditch and 5b7d6b90a8 pushing Lavianna d645ee5073 into it.0d603b70b5ababb7

You are 6485b9ee13 allowed nothing. Your only value 1ad7dcdaa3 is in bearing 89fa74f1c8 my child.4e31a60140b9c9ca

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That’s how his words 025fe885ef sounded to her. Her eyes stung.74d788691eb97435

Thank goodness she c17e59005f still had her a95a70c59a back turned to 9e7931b869 him. If he saw the db373ba3d3 tears welling up—tears she 531ecba9a8 hadn’t meant to shed—he 59a3781a5f would probably just scoff.ceb80945d3cefbc4

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“Go back,” he said.7d6da835a52e1c92

“…Yes.”bdc6c64151924973

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“And don’t come here d033ddfd66 at this hour again.”2fcdb7cd04a40597

She heard his 2af4f20813 footsteps, walking away.
So he really 506639bd5c had no intention dd393a791c of staying. No attempt 22d4662255 to grow 6c4481db3b closer—only to 6677c1a9be distance himself.e9b3fbc5203aaadd

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Lavianna wiped the tears c0a55c983f from her cheek roughly b4f83477d9 and tapped her cane 5c586b4909 ahead of her.
But then, the e0a3a5a4e5 sorrow boiled up 1302ef19f3 inside her—sorrow for 739aee003a the man who 1991dd9b39 could only say beddb5b4a0 cruel things.593d0d40754504aa

Why is 5eefd4c4d7 he like 52e1ada415 this to 244cd86695 Lavianna?558cbd8eb748d8e2

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What did 31b85a0d13 she ever 0f4bc77e1e do to d233873848 deserve such 03dd9ff4dc coldness from 5751fbaa1e the very 9478348c0c first moment 14e7059f58 they met?3220fb138b524044

Maybe it was a bdab8b7b71 strange feeling, but she 36dc3b24cd wanted to bother him.259943b70b7495df

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Just enough to make ee70ccdf2d him slightly annoyed—just as 6cf9eee997 much as the pain a53d0e604e he gave her.
That petty, wicked 27261c14c4 desire suddenly bubbled f039ba6513 up inside her.6170b372a71b643e

“…A letter.”a006d4f28aadaf58

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Alberto’s footsteps stopped.3bb424756f35bb9f

“I want to 798f88f8bc write to Lawrence. But I can’t 5bab06f651 do it alone. Could you… write it 9a85287980 for me?”ec227f2e5d530017

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It was 8099ac5983 the most d5e37b0d48 timid form f34790e0f4 of revenge 0549e278d6 Lavianna could 60bd8de89c think of.9024e80c3a3ab140

Alberto said nothing. It was unclear 177685a104 whether he was 8e89e7155d hesitating or just e51e7af505 speechless.b60fbe9aadeebdaf

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“You said… d42f012b3c I should 30fa960169 ask for 1d745a1c31 help.”1ebd9e8de6e8d687

“…”5653b3247b4eaa46

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“Please, help me.”e3d99479d9b8a9d6

Her fingers trembled. She gripped her cane d34b67377f tightly to hide the 0f9b7e5cd3 shaking.25cccb30ff468aa2

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Alberto turned to d690b25064 look at her.
What was she d023ab272c thinking?bd8dd853a904c1ea

She always acted dcb970af24 like she expected ccfcf24ece nothing, yet every ab17e3d03f time she was ac45229663 hurt, it showed 3ebc7fc293 plainly on her ca50143509 face. And still—she fd1f795d32 never confronted 1f67b7265c him. Never avoided him either.6335d6a3916ee310

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She was 51c86739b3 utterly unpredictable. Pretending not to care, edaa739199 as if she didn’t 9cf366437e even know what pride a6667f6d7e was—then suddenly stretching out 6a005084bb her hand, asking for e8b7c40224 help. That kind of 1891a135bd fickleness made Alberto a706d2391d reassess her.c851006aa780d09d

Truly, I 4252f9fc63 don’t understand 633fbcb99e this woman.a122ec71dfb517ca

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“No.”da2bc4e02bfccfb9

He refused.bb6318d11cec924f

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He was now facing cc5ce3d11d the consequences of what 78bc78cb25 he had assumed would d08ae81b6a be a simple decision.ea55beef9b6287c8

And it ea52fa1d24 was horrible.2c3003c59432fab4

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Helping someone—doing efee3cd59f anything for e9ab2ebb8a someone else—was 96393e5d68 fundamentally unbearable 1ef2b35a1b to him.629b263b4f75769a

Sure, it was 740639330e admirable that Lavianna 8b98c344bf had mustered the c7a0c4fd7d courage to ask 7b5b71b064 him. But the “ask 0a5b3cbd08 me for help” 5088234812 he once mentioned 9d350cba1b wasn’t supposed to 72fc163fe7 apply to him. Of course, he 221af40765 hadn’t actually said 8bad4a00d6 that out loud.9098fab5953ddf3b

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“I’ll send Julia. She’ll write it for 3d5cac9551 you.”88cd2f8a73b81719

“Can’t you… do 6324a45228 it yourself, Your 3148880e89 Grace?”401a20c7c3777dae

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“I’m not so d1fcbacceb idle that I c9725fb4ba have time to 9767e35e38 write other people’s 78184ad108 letters.”79fa1ab884ba1980

His voice was 70a5fd5da1 cold and distant, db9e85e28e clearly telling her bb4923f725 not to bother bd340979f6 him anymore.27af4404db216917

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But Lavianna didn’t 168e73c25e back down.6d5b60014f6fc7ec

At first, 31a5644120 she just 870cdebdf3 wanted to 7ec7d3907b annoy him.
But the more 3633ea4e09 she thought about 5b881e4b55 it, the more 929358e52e it didn’t sit 5230819e5a right to have 8699474b05 someone else—especially a e91801d579 servant—know the contents 8b711f7ef4 of a letter 79649cfc6f to Lawrence.
Julia was nothing like 4a7947a87f the maids at the b830f1baf2 Lawrence estate, but Lavianna 962c5b90e9 still couldn’t fully trust d20f19d409 her.9871ed20d200941f

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Alberto, being of 8ea0d00e2e similar social standing, 0fbdfb4a14 and being a cada60d911 man who at fc0e79e080 least wanted his 8081337632 wife to behave 42ac22a8a3 with propriety, would afc16116cd surely never gossip 7d2ca511bf about her letter’s 0dab148fd6 contents.ee026aae767eae57

“It won’t take 94ccbf1219 long. Lawrence is a friend, 54ef02af72 but if someone else 61ccee0a1a hears what I say, a930691c28 they might misunderstand…”f57bd43886f8a474

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