BAI Ch 21

“Did you buy this?”

“No.”

Shin Haebeom didn’t take his eyes off the phone screen.

“It’s a brand Kwon Joohyuk likes. I got a watch from them too, and so did Major Gi. Woohee has one.”

“You don’t feel anything? Even when you accept stuff like this?”

“It’s the reward for labor and proof of trust. If you think of it that way, it’s fine.”

“…”

“Is it like a payment for you?”

The box Ryujin threw narrowly grazed Shin Haebeom’s temple. Having narrowly escaped a concussion, he frowned.

“Watch your hands.”

“You watch your mouth.”

He really doesn’t let a single word slide. Still, seeing him act up like this was pleasant. It was a hundred, no, a thousand times better than the fool who just sat silently staring into space. Shin Haebeom tossed the phone, which had started buzzing again, back to Ryujin.

“Answer it. Your precious Hyung who misses you.”

He pulled out a vape pen hidden in the inner pocket of his Boston bag. He’d tried to hold back, but he was too jittery to resist.

Kwon Sehyuk exhaled a cloud of vapor toward the ceiling and pressed the call button again. This time, the ring didn’t last long.

— Hello.

Kwon Sehyuk shouted.

“Hyung, you’re too much! How many times did I call you?”

— Sorry. I was doing something else for a bit.

“What were you doing?”

— I was a bit busy… It started raining suddenly.

“It’s raining there too?”

— Yeah. A lot.

“Now that you mention it, I can hear the rain.”

— What were you doing?

“I’m at home. Ugh, I’m so frustrated. These fan club kids won’t even let me open my window lately.”

Kwon Sehyuk heard Ryujin’s laughter.

— You’re entering Disciplinary tomorrow, right?

“Oh, yeah.”

Ryujin’s breathing was heavy. Kwon Sehyuk felt a bit guilty. It didn’t seem like he was just a little busy. Well, garden maintenance is heavily affected by the weather.

“Sorry for bothering you. But I really wanted to hear your voice.”

— Why? Nervous?

“Not exactly…”

Kwon Sehyuk trailed off.

Entering the Disciplinary Training Corps was something he’d been looking forward to. It was arranged by his reliable uncle, and Shin Haebeom promised a relaxed and comfortable life. Though he was technically a public service worker, he knew he wouldn’t be treated like the average “public interest” worker. He knew that. But… his heart felt strangely heavy.

It wasn’t fear of the impending military life. It was just a feeling that this wasn’t the right path. Because he knew it was a decision made to escape the doping scandal. Kwon Sehyuk sighed.

“It’s all because of that interview.”

— What interview?

Going on a lighthearted talk show was a mistake. At his last schedule before entering the Disciplinary Training Corps, Kwon Sehyuk was blindsided.

“Ugh, thinking about that pig still pisses me off. Does being a reporter make him all that?”

That day, he was in good condition. Heroin relaxed his nerves and gave him a cozy feeling. The studio wasn’t large but had a warm atmosphere, and the tight suit and stiff-soled shoes didn’t feel so bad when he thought it was their last day.

The interviewers were friendly to Kwon Sehyuk. They maintained a considerate demeanor throughout. The carefully selected audience’s questions weren’t difficult either. Kwon Sehyuk answered wittily about his feelings before entering the Disciplinary Training Corps and his plans for broadcasting after discharge, creating a cheerful atmosphere.

Uhm Seungwon was the scoundrel who poured cold water on the mood Kwon Sehyuk had carefully cultivated. He claimed to be a culture reporter but seemed more like a social affairs one. From the start, he named aristocratic heirs who’d substituted mandatory service with hefty donations and pressed Kwon Sehyuk on why he chose a different path.

Thinking about it made his blood boil again. Kwon Sehyuk spat out roughly.

“What was I supposed to say in that situation? That my uncle told me to go, that my volleyball career was already over, and that I figured I’d solve the military issue since I had nothing better to do? Or did he want to hear about the doping? Why even ask such a question? He’s a reporter, not a cop or a soldier. That pig acting all high and mighty, so annoying.”

Spilling it all out felt good. A sigh mixed with the vape smoke Kwon Sehyuk exhaled.

“I should’ve just gone off on him, broadcast or not. I held back for my uncle’s sake, but I regret it so much.”

— Really?

“What would you have done, Hyung?”

— Me… Well, I can’t really imagine it.

“Ugh, I was such an idiot. That pig probably looked down on me big time.”

— No way. Who’d dare look down on you?

Kwon Sehyuk grinned.

“You look down on me.”

— When did I?

“You already forgot? You stood me up at the hospital last time. And today, you ignored all my calls and messages!”

— That… Sorry. I apologize. I’m really sorry.

“Let’s meet. When’s good for you, Hyung?”

— Um… Oh, hold on… I don’t think I can go out yet.

Still? It’s been days since they last saw each other. Kwon Sehyuk whined, clutching his phone.

“Why?”

There was no answer from Ryujin.

“Hyung? What’s up? Someone with you?”

— No, it’s not that.

Kwon Sehyuk sensed Ryujin wanted to end the call. That made him feel hurt. He didn’t know how many calls it took to get this one connected. But Ryujin couldn’t even focus on this single call.

“Hyung. When we’re talking, think only of me.”

— Sorry.

“Don’t just keep saying sorry.”

Ryujin’s voice grew quieter.

— Okay.

Kwon Sehyuk snapped to attention. He hadn’t meant to create a tense atmosphere. He quickly backpedaled.

“I’m not mad. I’m just worried something’s up with you.”

— No. Nothing’s up.

“…Feeling any better?”

Ryujin said he still had a cold.

— Must be body aches.

“I told you to rest. You’re not even fully recovered, and you keep working. Isn’t there another part-timer at Howollu?”

— Say that again, and I’m hanging up.

“Hey, Hyung! Wait!”

Kwon Sehyuk let out a deep sigh. Talking with Ryujin always left him with one thought: the one who loves more loses.

“Can’t I visit you at Howollu?”

— I’d hate that even more than you coming as a customer.

“That’s harsh.”

— No way. Don’t come… I told you clearly. Last time, and the time before, I’m just a gardener… but you went all the way to the Haelan Room. Because of you.

“Yeah. We had fun then, didn’t we?”

Kwon Sehyuk got up from the bed and walked to the window. He parted the blinds to look outside.

It was already late at night. The rain showed no sign of letting up. Yet, the number of fan club members camped outside his house hadn’t dwindled. If anything, the situation seemed to fuel their resolve.

Kwon Sehyuk sighed deeply at the “Prince Kwon Sehyuk Mandatory Service Opposition” chants piercing through the glass. They don’t know what’s going on.

“I really miss you, Hyung.”

— Kwon Sehyuk… Later.

“I’m fine without the drugs. I’ll match your place and time.”

Kwon Sehyuk fidgeted anxiously with his phone. There was no reply from Ryujin.

“Hyung?”

Click.

The call ended. The moment he realized it, anger surged. Kwon Sehyuk threw the vape pen he was holding onto the floor. The white vapor dispersed into the air.

“What the hell.”

He was dumbfounded.

“What the hell! Seriously!”

He thought he’d been patient enough. He understood when Ryujin stood him up at the hospital and later made excuses about being sick. But now he was being treated like a complete fool.

Kwon Sehyuk stomped his foot in frustration. Once wasn’t enough, so he slammed his foot down several times loudly. When he suddenly looked up, his younger sibling stood at the half-open door, looking scared.

“Hyung-ah…”

Normally, he would’ve smiled. He might’ve said he wasn’t mad and apologized for startling them. But right now, Kwon Sehyuk wasn’t in the mood. The mere fact that someone needed his attention and care made him irritated.

Kwon Sehyuk snapped coldly.

“Get out.”

“Hyung-ah.”

“You don’t just barge into someone’s room.”

“I’m not just someone, am I?”

“Get out when I say get out!”

His roar echoed. Kwon Sehyuk just watched as his terrified sibling ran off without even closing the door.

He’d never stopped his sibling from coming into his room before. He didn’t mind even when they took his stuff without asking. But the pampering was over, Kwon Sehyuk thought. How long do I have to clean up after you? I’m busy living my own life!

His throat burned. Kwon Sehyuk grabbed the tumbler on the table. The lukewarm water only made him angrier. He hurled the tumbler at the wall. The water bottle rolling pitifully on the floor felt like his rejected self.

The impact turned on the audio system, and music started playing. Of all things, it was Ryu Yeonbi’s song. The husky voice, so much like Ryujin’s, painfully stabbed at his heart. Kwon Sehyuk’s shoulders slumped.

“Stop it already!”

Ryujin elbowed Shin Haebeom in the side. He winced, saying “ow,” but his face was still smiling.

The call with Kwon Sehyuk was forcibly ended. Throughout the call, Shin Haebeom had been slipping his hands under Ryujin’s clothes, groping him, and it finally escalated. Ryujin sighed and tried to call back. But Shin Haebeom was quicker. He snatched the phone from Ryujin’s hand, then, with an incredulous expression, pinned Ryujin to the floor and climbed on top of him.

“What… Ah! Stop it!”

“Having fun playing Hyung?”

Shin Haebeom bared his canines and grinned.

“Call me Hyung.”

“No way.”

“Why not? I’m your Hyung, aren’t I?”

“You’re not my Hyung. More like an uncle or an old man.”

Seeing Ryujin hurriedly cover his face with his arms, Shin Haebeom burst out laughing.

“Fine. Why bother talking with you.”

“…”

“Take off your clothes. You stink.”

“I’m fine. They’ll dry if I keep them on.”

“Don’t be stupid, take them off. You’ll catch a cold.”

Ryujin glared at Shin Haebeom.

“You think I don’t know what you’re up to.”

“Up to? What am I up to?”

His tilted head looked somewhat innocent. But Ryujin wasn’t fooled by Shin Haebeom’s acting.

As Shin Haebeom crawled closer on his knees, Ryujin scooted back on his butt.

“Get away.”

“Look at that face. Am I going to eat you?”

Shin Haebeom’s hand reached out and grabbed the hem of Ryujin’s cardigan. Ryujin tried to pry it off.

“Come on…!”

He felt Shin Haebeom’s lower body between his legs. Goosebumps shot up his spine.

“Don’t mess around.”

“Mess around? Do I look that idle?”

“Seriously… Don’t. I’m still in pain.”

He pulled out his last defense, but it only gave Shin Haebeom an excuse.

“Right. You’re a patient. You’re already unwell, so catching a cold won’t do, will it? So take off your clothes. I’ll warm you up.”

“No thanks. I’ll handle it myself, so… back off!”

“You don’t know how to handle anything. All you know is how to pamper that mutt.”

Ryujin turned to escape, but Shin Haebeom lunged, knocking him down on the spot. A large palm pressed the back of his head. His forehead hit the hard floor. It felt like his scalp was being torn off.

“Let go!”

“Let’s get those clothes off before you catch a cold, baby.”

“Get lost!”

The rain-soaked, heavy cardigan was peeled off. The wet T-shirt was pushed up to his chest. Ryujin whimpered, crawling on the floor.

“Move… No!”

Looking down at the struggling Ryujin, Shin Haebeom laughed. It was like a deer caught in a trap, desperately trying to escape a hunter’s grasp.

“Ah!”

Sharp teeth sank into his nape. Ryujin’s waist trembled.

“Get off! I said no!”

His clenched jaw quivered.

“Please…! Don’t! Don’t touch me!”

“You’re just so touchable.”

Shin Haebeom’s palm caressed his chest. Ryujin crawled forward, panting. Every time he moved up, he was dragged back down. A firm, hot palm pressed his entire areola, circling it, then pinched and pulled the stiffened nipple between fingers.

Ryujin clenched his teeth, swallowing a moan. The sensation of a penis rubbing between his buttocks drove him insane. Scary. So scary.

“Damn it… Damn it, stop. Please stop.”

“Our Kokko is cute, pretty, and even sexy. Living in a world of your own.”

“What’s this lunatic saying… Ah!”

His ear was bitten. Tears welled in Ryujin’s eyes.

The sound of rain grew distant.

His body still hadn’t healed from that day. Bruises and bite marks were vivid on his nape, shoulders, chest, and sides. His hips, thighs, and buttocks were a mess too. Shin Haebeom must’ve noticed his pathetic gait.

Ryujin found Shin Haebeom horrific. A human incapable of empathizing with others’ pain. Whether Ryujin was hurting or bleeding, Shin Haebeom only cared about satisfying his own desires. This must be why they say the world’s gone to hell when people like him succeed.

Cold sweat dripped onto the floor. The hand kneading his chest moved to his side. Shin Haebeom clicked his tongue.

“Does Yena starve you?”

“It’s not Noona’s fault. I just… keep throwing up. So… back off. I’m really struggling.”

It was a pain Shin Haebeom would never understand, even if he died and came back.

Every time Ryujin saw his emaciated limbs and scarred, mottled skin, he was overwhelmed with the urge to tear his body apart.

He couldn’t eat, and even when he managed to, he’d vomit soon after because he hated the idea of his body’s mass increasing by even a gram.

Shin H a Shin Haebeom’s eyes darkened.

“What are you going to do?”

“What…”

“Ha Shinsung. Dragging it out only hurts you.”

A hot hand slipped into his loose sweatpants. It grabbed and kneaded his buttocks through his underwear. Ryujin tried to crawl forward on his knees, but it only further aroused Shin Haebeom’s lower body. He laughed.

“They say chickens used to be birds that could fly.”

“What?”

“But locked in tight cages and fed by humans, they got fat and couldn’t fly anymore.”

“What nonsense are you… Ah, don’t touch…!”

“Humans, you know, they’re really cruel. They deliberately bred them that way. Birds that can’t fly are easier to eat. So, when will our Kokko fatten up?”

Shin Haebeom sighed. His breeding methods were clearly wrong. On Jung Ryujin’s scrawny body, the only edible part was this chewy butt.

“Put on some weight. Please.”

“Ah…!”

He pushed aside the underwear and slipped a finger inside. Shin Haebeom kneaded Ryujin’s buttocks and licked his nape.

The pants and underwear were stripped off. A finger slid between his cheeks. Long and knobby. The finger’s owner whispered.

“Can’t wait.”

Shin Haebeom spent a long time stroking and tapping the entrance, as if gauging how many fingers he could fit.

With his eyes tightly shut, shaking his head, Ryujin was presented with a cosmetic bottle. A common tube of moisturizer sold everywhere.

“This okay?”

Ryujin’s lips trembled. Shin Haebeom’s wet shirt pressed against his bare back. The tongue licking his earlobe was damp.

“No.”

Ryujin swallowed a sob.

“I don’t want to.”

“I do.”

Shin Haebeom opened the cap with one hand and squeezed the tube. White lotion spilled out, staining the floor. Ryujin shook his head.

“No, no… Don’t. Don’t…”

“What a waste.”

Shin Haebeom wiped the lotion off the floor with his palm. He started with his index finger.

“Aaah…!”

Baekgu was outside the camellia room, scratching the door and whimpering. Shin Haebeom didn’t care. He hoisted Ryujin’s hips, panting in pain, and shoved his middle finger in alongside the index.

“Haa, ugh!”

The sound of flesh tearing rang out. Ryujin began to cry.

“Ahh! It hurts…! It hurts!”

“Good boy. Stay still.”

The fingers digging inside pulled out.

“Bleeding again.”

Burying his face in the floor, Ryujin pleaded in a fading voice.

“Next time… Do it next time. I’m really in pain…”

“I want to do it now.”

“Just this once, please… I’m really struggling.”

“You were cursing me earlier.”

“Sorry. I was wrong…”

Ryujin couldn’t finish. A groan slipped through his clenched lips. Shin Haebeom licked his nape and said.

“The pitiful act doesn’t suit you, Kokko.”

The sound of a belt buckle undoing was like thunder. Despair washed over him. Ryujin pressed his forehead to the back of his hand and began to sob.

“It’s okay. We’ve done this a lot.”

“No… I really don’t want to…!”

“Understand me. I’ve held back for a long time too.”

The lotion-slick entrance was rubbed by the tip. It pried open the torn flesh and pushed in. Just the thick head catching at the entrance was so painful Ryujin wanted to bite his tongue off.

“Ah… Ah.”

“Stop whining. It’s not even in yet.”

Ryujin’s jaw trembled. Shin Haebeom’s finger entered his mouth. Ryujin bit down hard, but he didn’t even groan, let alone flinch.

The rock-hard penis forced its way through the writhing inner walls. Ryujin, biting Shin Haebeom’s finger, sobbed and crawled on the floor.

The predator smiled. His muscular shoulders heaved once. The gluteus maximus tensed.

“Aaah! Ah!”

It tore through the flesh, plunging in to the hilt. Ryujin’s wails echoed in the room. Shin Haebeom trembled in ecstasy. It was hot. It felt like smoke was rising from his skin. He ripped open his shirt buttons. Throwing off his clothes, he collapsed onto Ryujin’s trembling back.

“Ryujin-ah…”

Shin Haebeom bared his canines. He groaned, scraping Ryujin’s nape. He felt the pulsing vein beneath the thin skin. Biting Ryujin’s neck, Shin Haebeom curled his lips. The prettiest, cutest, and sexiest prey in the world. My Jung Ryujin.

The muscles of his lower back and thighs swelled. A shiver ran up his spine. Shin Haebeom wanted Ryujin to know how long he’d held back.

He pulled out, and before Ryujin could take a breath of relief, he thrust back in. With a thud, lotion splattered. A trickle of red blood ran down the inside of Ryujin’s thigh.

“Ahh… It hurts. Hurts. No.”

“So pretty. You’re really pretty.”

Shin Haebeom kissed Ryujin’s crying head. The rain, dirt, and wood scent lingered in his damp hair.

The sensation of his painfully hard penis rubbing against the soft inner walls felt good. Ryujin sobbed, saying it hurt, saying no, but it always ended up like this. With the help of lotion, Shin Haebeom forced open the bleeding, torn hole. Ryujin’s screams with every thrust were so cute he couldn’t stand it.

As Shin Haebeom swallowed hot breaths, he noticed Ryujin’s hand. The clenched fist had bones and veins bulging. Shin Haebeom enveloped that pathetic fist in his large palm. One day, this hand would kill him. The thought alone was blissful.

Shin Haebeom didn’t want to end up like Kwon Joohyuk. He didn’t want to suddenly pay for past sins at the hands of someone he trusted. Not that he’d avoid his dues—that’s cowardly.

But Shin Haebeom wanted to choose his own end. At the hands of someone he picked. No pointless resistance, just take it, Chiwoo.

It was an honorable, dazzling finale. Like the grand finale of a fireworks show.

Holding Ryujin’s hand, Shin Haebeom thought. I’ll give you everything I have. Devour me and survive.

“I’ll wait.”

In hell.

“I’ll wait…”

Shin Haebeom wrapped one arm around Ryujin’s shoulders. His other hand went lower. Pushing through the pubic hair, he grabbed the limp penis, and Ryujin flopped like a fish pulled from a river.

“Haa, ah, no, no… Ahh!”

As Ryujin twisted his hips, the inner walls clamped tight. A dizzying pleasure hit Shin Haebeom’s crown. He finally understood the use of this useless thing. It was there to grab and pull.

He recalled a toy from his childhood. A toy car that rolled forward when you pulled the ring on its tail and let go with a snap.

✶⋆.˚

A bell woke him. At first, he thought it was an alarm. Wondering why sleeping time passed so quickly, he grabbed his phone.

Kwon Sehyuk’s eyes widened when he checked the screen. It wasn’t an alarm. It was a call from Ryujin.

Kwon Sehyuk kicked off the blanket and sat up.

“Hyung?”

— …

“Ryujin Hyung? What’s up?”

— Sehyuk-ah.

It was definitely Ryujin. His voice was hoarse.

— Sorry for waking you.

“No, it’s fine to call.”

Kwon Sehyuk swept back his messy bangs. He grabbed a nearby tumbler. Gulping down lukewarm water cleared his head. He slid off the bed and flopped onto the couch. It was four in the morning. Even during volleyball team days, he didn’t wake up this early. Unless it was a night of eating, drinking, and partying.

“What’s wrong?”

— Sorry. I’ll call again tomorrow.

“It’s okay, tell me.”

Ryujin kept apologizing. It was enough to make Kwon Sehyuk forget about pressing him for cutting off the earlier call. He sighed.

“Hyung, I’m really fine. I was tossing and turning anyway, couldn’t sleep.”

A blatant lie, but it was okay. If it reassured Ryujin.

“Must be because tomorrow’s a big day. Nervous, I guess.”

— Then you should sleep more.

“Nah. It’s better to stay awake than sleep fitfully.”

— Okay…

“But Hyung, where are you? The bathroom? Your voice is echoing.”

— The hospital.

“What?”

Over the phone, Ryujin’s voice was very faint.

— I’m at the hospital. Right now.

Kwon Sehyuk checked the time again. His eyes weren’t wrong. It was definitely four in the morning, and the only hospital open at this hour was the emergency room.

Kwon Sehyuk couldn’t hide his dismay. He knew Ryujin was unwell, but he hadn’t realized it was this serious.

And I didn’t even know.

Kwon Sehyuk wanted to bash his forehead against the floor. It was a custom from his hometown. When someone committed an unforgivable wrong, they knelt and struck their forehead hard against the ground until the other person told them to stop.

“Hyung, how bad is it? Should I come?”

— No. I’m not here for myself.

Ryujin stammered on.

— Sehyuk-ah. I have a question… I thought you might know. You graduated high school, and you’re smarter than me.

“Okay.”

— What’s a vegetable?

“Huh?”

— I know what it means. But is it really… dead? Even if they’re breathing? Breathing but still dead? No matter how long you wait, they won’t wake up? Ever?

Kwon Sehyuk felt his fingertips grow cold.

“Why are you asking about that?”

— Just because.

“Just because?!”

Kwon Sehyuk sprang up from the couch. He stuffed the car keys and wallet, carelessly tossed on the desk, into the pockets of his tracksuit pants.

“Which hospital? I’m coming.”

— No. Don’t.

“I know something’s up. I can tell from your voice. Who is it? Someone you know?”

— …

Hospital and vegetable. Those two words alone painted a picture in his mind. For some reason, someone close to Ryujin was in a coma. They might have already been declared beyond recovery. A vegetable, or brain-dead, as Ryujin put it.

Kwon Sehyuk thought he understood why Ryujin called him. When faced with a situation they can’t overcome, people grasp at straws. They ask questions they already know the answers to and lean on people they usually wouldn’t. Even knowing it won’t change anything.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Kwon Sehyuk gripped his phone tightly.

“You should’ve discussed something this important with me!”

— Sorry.

“Apologize later. Tell me which hospital you’re at.”

— I’m sorry, Sehyuk-ah.

Ryujin’s next words cut deep.

— It’s not your business. Sorry. I shouldn’t have called.

“Hyung!”

— I was just scared. Must be the hospital. I was like this as a kid too, and I’m still a mess as an adult. Pathetic, right? I think so too.

A low laugh came through.

Kwon Sehyuk slumped onto the couch. He buried his head between his knees and muttered in a hollow voice.

“If it’s not my business, why’d you call? Curious about what a vegetable is? You’re at a hospital. Ask a doctor. They’ll explain it way better than me. In a way you’ll understand.”

— Sorry.

“I don’t want apologies. I’m just… shocked that I’m only finding out now that you’re dealing with this. It’s ridiculous. You haven’t been meeting me lately, not because you were sick with a cold, but because of this, right?”

— …

“Be honest.”

The sound of Ryujin swallowing dryly came through. Kwon Sehyuk waited.

— Half of it.

“What kind of answer is that?”

— Sorry.

“Stop just apologizing!”

Kwon Sehyuk swept back his bangs.

“I want to help you, Hyung. Don’t think I’m overstepping. I’m not like the random nobodies around you.”

A suffocating silence followed. After a long pause, Ryujin replied in a hoarse voice.

— They say I’m the only guardian. Isn’t that weird? We’re not even related by blood, we weren’t even that close… but I’m the guardian. So… I have to do it. But I don’t know. The doctor explains, but I can’t understand. It’s really strange. It’s clearly our language, but it feels like a foreign one.

“Put someone else on. I’ll talk to them.”

— No.

“Hyung. Do you really not know who I am?”

— I know. I know exactly who you are. Sorry for calling. I just wanted to hear your voice.

Kwon Sehyuk’s lips parted.

“Hyung, are you okay right now?”

— …

“Where the hell are you? Tell me. I’ll come…”

Again. The call cut off again.

Kwon Sehyuk threw his phone to the floor. He raked his hands through his hair. There was no time to lament what kind of bolt from the blue this was at dawn. He had to figure out where Ryujin was. He was struggling.

He didn’t know what was going on. But one thing was certain. Ryujin was cornered right now.

Kwon Sehyuk leapt to his feet. He picked up his phone, stuffed it in his pocket, and bolted out of the room. He ran down the stairs, practically tumbling, biting his lower lip. His words about wanting to help Ryujin weren’t empty.

Ryujin lifted his head. The phone screen glowed in Shin Haebeom’s hand.

Call ended.

Staring at those cold four words, Ryujin thought Shin Haebeom, dressed in a black suit, looked like a grim reaper. Black jacket, black pants, black shoes. Even the shirt and tie underneath were all black.

It was new clothing Shin Yena had bought last week. From the size, Ryujin had guessed it was for Shin Haebeom. But he hadn’t known it was for this purpose. Shin Haebeom’s black suit was mourning attire.

Ryujin slowly stood. His tailbone ached from sitting on the hard toilet lid.

“Here.”

Ryujin took the phone Shin Haebeom casually handed back. If asked why he called Kwon Sehyuk, he had no answer. He just needed someone, and among the few contacts saved in his phone, Kwon Sehyuk was the only one with no connection to Ha Shinsung. That was truly it.

“Let’s go.”

“Wait.”

“What?”

“Just… give me a moment.”

“What moment? Time to think?”

Shin Haebeom laughed.

“What’s thinking going to change?”

“Don’t you feel anything?”

“Is there a reason I should be shaken?”

Shrugging, Shin Haebeom sneered.

“I thought you were hiding in the bathroom crying. Poor Ha Shinsung.”

“I’m not.”

“Good to know.”

“But that doesn’t mean I feel nothing.”

“Of course you don’t.”

Ryujin didn’t respond. He just fidgeted with the hem of the black T-shirt Shin Haebeom had forced him to wear.

Even after the act, Shin Haebeom hadn’t let him go. He didn’t even let him wipe the blood-mixed semen running down his thighs.

He put on pants without underwear and was dragged out by the arm. When he screamed and resisted, Shin Haebeom silenced him by threatening to send him to Kwon Joohyuk.

Ryujin didn’t know why Shin Haebeom was in such a rush. He thought Shin Haebeom came to Howollu to deliver Kwon Joohyuk’s gift and satisfy his own desires. But Shin Haebeom’s real purpose was something else.

The true reason Shin Haebeom came to Howollu. Ryujin only realized it when he saw the sign for the 5th Central Hospital. Six green-glowing letters in the dark.

Shin Haebeom tapped the shoulder of Ryujin, who stood dazed in the hallway.

“Go.”

“…”

“How many people have to wait how many more hours because of you?”

Ryujin, about to protest, closed his mouth. The fine hairs on his long nape stood on end. He swallowed dryly and started walking. Shin Haebeom was right behind him, tapping his shoulder to urge him on whenever he slowed or paused.

The long corridor was steeped in darkness. It was so quiet he could hear the ticking of a wristwatch’s second hand.

In front of the ICU door, medical staff and a plainclothes soldier were waiting. Ryujin kept his head bowed, staring at his own feet.

Shin Haebeom opened the door. He pushed the hesitating Ryujin’s back.

Ha Shinsung was alone. Various tubes and hoses covered his unconscious body. The life-support machine glowed blue in the dark.

Ryujin couldn’t bring himself to approach. Even after the medical staff’s explanations and the solemn sermon from a religious group representative, he stood rooted to the spot, unable to move.

Is that Ha Shinsung?

Not a starving child from a famine-stricken country or a mummy?

The Ha Shinsung lying in the bed already seemed dead. He wasn’t the person Ryujin knew.

Ha Shinsung had suffered a cardiac arrest during his second surgery, falling into a coma with severe brain damage. Shin Haebeom repeatedly said that even if he miraculously woke up, full recovery would be unlikely, and he’d rely on caregivers while racking up enormous hospital bills until he died.

Ryujin covered his ears. The humming of the life-support machine sounded like a swarm of bees buzzing around him.

Shin Haebeom looked at the tubes and worm-like wires covering Ha Shinsung’s body. The advancements in medical science were impressive. He wanted to brief ancient Egypt’s pharaohs or China’s Qin Shi Huang on modern cutting-edge technology. You could’ve lived forever. If only you’d been born a few centuries later!

“Jung Ryujin.”

The face that turned without answering was pale.

“How do you feel right now?”

“…”

Ryujin weakly dropped his gaze. He still couldn’t believe it. That this was Ha Shinsung.

The bandaged face revealed only one eye and swollen lips. The oxygen mask connected by a hose fogged up and cleared repeatedly. His chest rose and fell laboriously. The blood seeping through the bandages was purple.

“He’s suffering.”

Shin Haebeom said.

“Set him free.”

The frail body swayed. Shin Haebeom held Ryujin firmly to keep him from collapsing, forcing him to stand upright.

“I want to see Ha Shinsung’s face… properly.”

“You won’t recognize him.”

“Still.”

Ryujin murmured.

“It’s the last time.”

Shin Haebeom sighed inwardly. Melodrama wasn’t his genre. He turned Ryujin to face him directly.

“Snap out of it. Think about what that bastard did to you.”

Ryujin’s eyes wavered.

“If you see his face now, you’ll never forget him. What do you think’s under those bandages? The Ha Shinsung face you remember is gone.”

“…”

“A human body isn’t like a target. A bullet doesn’t just make one hole.”

A bullet the size of a finger joint spins at terrifying speed, shredding skin, tearing muscle, and shattering bone. Ironically, the aftermath of surgery is worse. They pin fragmented bones with metal rods and stitch the skin together in patches.

“Ugh, it’d haunt my dreams.”

Shin Haebeom joked.

“He was at least handsome when alive, but what if a zombie with half his face crushed comes for your ass?”

“…”

“Kokko. People are waiting.”

A human body begins to decay the moment it dies. In the meantime, organs designated for transplant are removed and sent to someone desperately waiting in an operating room. Involving a religious group wasn’t just for show. This wasn’t organ trafficking; it was legal organ donation.

Shin Haebeom had seen the process many times. Countless unclaimed death row inmates had met their end that way. Still, Ha Shinsung was better off than them. At least he’d meet his end at the hands of someone who loved him.

That was the greatest mercy Shin Haebeom could offer Ha Shinsung.

We were never that close to begin with.

In their childhood, Shin Haebeom and Ha Shinsung were rivals, and Jin Chiwoo mediated between them. But Ha Shinsung betrayed even Jin Chiwoo. After that day, Jin Chiwoo treated Ha Shinsung like a complete stranger. Even as <White Lion> gained fame and Ha Shinsung became the face of an anti-government group, Jin Chiwoo acted as if he’d never heard the name.

Because it was true.

In Jin Chiwoo’s memory, the childhood friend Ha Shinsung was gone. He was just a <White Lion> executive. A different person with the same name.

Shin Haebeom smiled in the dark. It was all Ha Shinsung’s doing. Excuses about it being his father’s decision didn’t hold. Ha Shinsung should’ve found a way to change his ruthless father’s mind.

A tripartite suicide pact would’ve been better than the birth of a monster.

Shin Haebeom placed a hand on the trembling Ryujin’s shoulder.

“He’s doing a good thing.”

“…”

“Right? Organ donation is such a noble and great act.”

Ryujin couldn’t help but weaken at those words, thinking of how his only cousin died.

The baby born to Park Jinah and Jeong Seonghyeon. Born with a congenital heart defect. Ryujin regretted not asking if it was a girl or a boy. Shin Haebeom hugged Ryujin’s back and whispered.

“Aren’t you curious how many people will live because Ha Shinsung dies?”

Ryujin shook his head. Shin Haebeom buried his face in Ryujin’s nape and chuckled.

Life and records belong to the living. Shin Haebeom thought erasing Ha Shinsung’s memory from Jung Ryujin’s mind was nothing. He was confident. He was already bringing in the next prey. Kwon Sehyuk, blissfully unaware he was headed for the altar, loomed in his mind.

Kwon Sehyuk bounded down the stairs three at a time. He didn’t care if it made noise. His mind was already scouring Gwangseong General Hospital. He wasn’t certain he’d find Ryujin, but it was better than doing nothing. He didn’t want to lie in bed with his phone nearby, anxiously waiting for a call that might never come. Kwon Sehyuk charged toward the front door.

“Where are you going?”

“…”

“Where are you off to at this hour? In the rain?”

Jang Seunghee stood with her arms crossed, wearing a slip dress under a cardigan. Kwon Sehyuk slowly turned around.

“Just to the convenience store nearby.”

He regretted it the moment he said it. In a neighborhood where residents without cars bulk-ordered groceries and essentials, it was a habit ingrained in daily life. This house was no different. There was a storage room in the basement, and even the hired help said “I’m going to the basement” when they needed something, not that they were going shopping. A convenience store, of all things.

Kwon Sehyuk rarely went to convenience stores even with high school friends. The school cafeteria sold better stuff for cheaper.

“Are you kidding? Lying now?”

Jang Seunghee’s gaze shifted to the large grandfather clock in the living room.

“Do you know what time it is? Three hours from now, Secretary Im will show up, and you’re going where?”

“…”

“Buying cigarettes?”

“Mom!”

“Don’t yell.”

Jang Seunghee frowned.

“You know what tomorrow is. How can you leave the house at this hour? With your wallet and car keys?”

“…”

“Are you seeing someone lately?”

Kwon Sehyuk bristled.

“What’s that out of nowhere? Seriously!”

His shout echoed through the spacious house.

He sensed someone coming down the stairs. Kwon Sehyuk groaned inwardly. Why did that kid have such sharp ears? So sensitive.

“Ugh, seriously…”

Kwon Sehyuk scratched his head. He didn’t know how his mother had picked up on it. Who was it? Im Chanyoung? Someone from the design team? Or just a hunch?

No idea.

He’d never told anyone about Ryujin. Kwon Sehyuk roughly rubbed his face. His tired voice slipped through his fingers.

“It’s not like that. Drop it.”

“Are you sensible or senseless? Do you know what time this is? How critical this moment is for you! You know your uncle is helping you with everything, and you’re wandering around?”

“…”

“Who is it? Someone you met through broadcasting? A celebrity? An anchor?”

“I said it’s not like that!”

“You!”

The living room chandelier lights flicked on. Blinded by the sudden brightness, Kwon Sehyuk closed his eyes. Jang Seunghee didn’t miss the chance. She rushed to the front door, pushed Kwon Sehyuk aside, and activated the emergency security system, locking the door. Shutters descended over every window in the house.

Kwon Sehyuk’s jaw dropped. To think she’d misuse a system designed for gunfire or terrorist attacks like this.

“Mom!”

“You’re not stepping one foot outside until Secretary Im and the others arrive.”

“Come on…! Why are you doing this to me, really! This isn’t a prison! What crime did I commit?”

“You’re not exactly innocent.”

Kwon Sehyuk pounded his chest with his fist. He was going insane. Time was ticking away while this was happening. Ryujin was struggling, and he couldn’t do anything to help.

“Come on! I can handle my own business!”

“Left alone, you get distracted by nonsense!”

Jang Seunghee thrust out her hand.

“Give me your phone.”

“What?”

“You won’t need it at Disciplinary anyway. Hand it over.”

“What kind of nonsense is that! You’re the one who made me a public service worker!”

“You think you’re just a regular public service worker? You’re lying low there. Until your uncle wraps things up and it quiets down. Those volleyball team kids—digging into them turned up more than a few shady things. What the hell were you doing with them?!”

Kwon Sehyuk clamped his mouth shut. He lowered his eyes and stuffed his phone into his pants pocket.

“Kwon Sehyuk!”

No way he’d let it be taken. The mere thought of his mother finding out about Ryujin was horrifying. In an hour—no, thirty minutes—every detail about Ryujin would be laid bare before her. From being Ryu Yeonbi’s brother to his entire life story. His background, his origins. Kwon Sehyuk didn’t think his mother would just hand Ryujin a cash envelope. She’d make him disappear without a trace.

“You didn’t just do drugs with those kids.”

“…”

“I heard it all from Park Byun, so don’t try to dodge. Your record is quite colorful. Reckless driving, theft, school violence.”

Jang Seunghee was furious to her core. Kwon Sehyuk stood silent before his mother, arms crossed.

“Kwon Sehyuk. What the hell were you doing at school? There was even a school violence committee? How did you hide that from me so perfectly? Were you beating up and bullying kids? How could you!”

Kwon Sehyuk sighed.

“It’s not like that. Don’t jump to conclusions.”

“Kwon Sehyuk. Do I need to pull your bank records to make you come to your senses?”

“I’m not involved in that stuff. Really. I swear on Father’s name, I’ve never hurt anyone. I wasn’t the one summoned to the committee.”

“Then why did Park Byun say that? Why’s your name coming up in those things?”

“Ugh, friends cover for each other, that’s just how it is!”

“What?”

“What, am I supposed to sit back when a friend’s facing jail? Settlement money, it’s just a few bucks.”

Jang Seunghee’s face flushed red.

“Are you insane?!”

“What?!”

“You paid to help a kid who committed school violence? You call that an excuse? Are you out of your mind? I’m going crazy. You’re driving me absolutely insane!”

“Fine. I won’t go out! I won’t, so stop!”

Jang Seunghee swept back her hair and sighed.

“Give me the car keys and your phone.”

“No way.”

“I’ll give them back tomorrow, so hand them over now and go to your room to sleep. Or I’ll start pulling a list of your so-called friends or vermin right now.”

Kwon Sehyuk gripped his phone tightly. He’d rather flush it down the toilet than hand it over. With resolve, he retorted.

“No phone. It’s my privacy.”

“Come on.”

“It’s my privacy! I don’t like you looking at my phone. It’s the same thing!”

The argument ended with him giving up only the car keys. It was just one night, but Kwon Sehyuk couldn’t shake the hollow feeling. He walked like a defeated soldier. As he trudged up the stairs, Jang Seunghee’s lamenting voice followed.

“Park Byun’s something else. How could he handle things just based on a kid’s word and never say a thing to me?”

“I told him I had your permission!”

“Be quiet, Kwon Sehyuk!”

“You be quiet!”

Kwon Sehyuk wanted to cry. What did I do so wrong? All I did was try to leave the house. Why drag up old stuff and tear into me?

He saw his sibling standing in the hallway. He heard them call him but ignored it. He returned to his room. Kicking the door hard shook the walls. From the first floor, Jang Seunghee shouted. You’ll bring the house down!

He didn’t care. If this prison-like house collapsed, it’d be better.

Shin Haebeom entered a 24-hour fast-food restaurant. Ryujin, sunk into the Range Rover’s passenger seat, closed his eyes. He desperately wanted to hurry back to Howollu and wash, but Shin Haebeom insisted on eating something, annoying him. He knew the only places open at this hour were fast-food joints.

Returning to the driver’s seat, Shin Haebeom handed over a bag. The shoulders of his black suit were wet.

“Here.”

“I’m not eating.”

“Not hungry?”

“Can you even stomach food?”

“Yeah.”

Shin Haebeom unwrapped a burrito and took a bite. The smell of greasy food filled the car.

“I’m exhausted from staying up all night. Gotta eat this at least to keep going.”

It was as if Ha Shinsung’s existence had already vanished from Shin Haebeom’s life. Ryujin was speechless. Is that even human? Shin Haebeom seemed to feel none of the emotions a person naturally would. Guilt, sadness, those things.

“What?”

“I can’t believe it…”

Shin Haebeom scoffed.

“Stop moping and eat. You need to eat to live. Eating’s what keeps you going.”

“I’m not eating. My stomach’s bad.”

“I’ll count to three, so grab something. Disobey, and we’re heading to the backseat.”

Shin Haebeom’s threats had a repertoire. To the basement. To Kwon Joohyuk. And now, the backseat.

Ryujin hurriedly reached into the bag. He thought he could manage fries.

“You always pick the cheap stuff.”

“…”

Ryujin silently ate the fries. He thought he’d vomit right after, but he didn’t. He was actually hungry. The realization stunned him.

How…

Despite Ha Shinsung’s death, Ryujin loathed himself for not crying and instead feeling hunger.

“Urk!”

His throat clogged. Shin Haebeom clicked his tongue and pulled out a drink. It was a cola, droplets beading on the cup’s surface. The sharp sting of carbonation hit his swollen throat.

“Pfft!”

“Hey, you! You’re something else, really!”

“Water, water…!”

Shin Haebeom looked like he wanted to kick Ryujin out. But instead of opening the door and shoving him, he unscrewed a 500ml water bottle and handed it over, along with portable wet wipes.

“Clean up what you spilled.”

“Okay, okay.”

“I’d make you lick it clean, but I’ll hold back.”

Ryujin pouted. At that moment, Shin Haebeom’s phone buzzed.

Ryujin pulled out a wet wipe and bent down to pick up the fry crumbs spilled on the floor. Over the crouched Ryujin’s back, Shin Haebeom spoke.

“Your Highness?”

Ryujin jolted upright, banging his head on the passenger glove compartment but not feeling the pain. His shock came first.

“What’s the matter? Calling me like this.”

Shin Haebeom’s lips curled high. His eyes softened into curves. Ryujin saw the canines peeking through his lips. They looked especially sharp today.

“No problem. Speak. I’m always ready, aren’t I? No, no. No need to feel burdened.”