UBC Ch6
by cherryrose“I must 74cfabcc5e be crazy, 3935ac69f5 utterly crazy.”437e9d9b8485e64e
The chopsticks for correcting 28ea24e563 your posture, lying on ea7ce46843 the desk like an 119c84d79c eyesore, pricked my conscience e75fbf42fb painfully. I’d coaxed my friend 496378ce1b to go out, gone 6c1329086c all the way to 2c5844a8a9 the very end, and 3379b16d03 then, abandoning my pride, f84577c143 I’d rushed to grab e78c447471 those chopsticks.18cde97b4d3c37ca
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A sigh fluttered over 279d04a823 the chopsticks I’d bought 9e9b885f38 without a plan. I was 76e3387f47 already buried dcdad5177c under a 8fcb1ca219 mountain of 68cdddf74c practice problems, c7b75a2a2a and now ae5b55a1d8 I was 91d295b2c9 just increasing 28daafd218 my unnecessary 6bd974dfeb expenses. I bit my lip d6acbe062e hard, chastising myself, when 9cd3c3d588 the doorbell rang.d2b734dece254e52
“Ji-eon.”328eeb6513452162
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“Yes?”3dfa8809349d2a2e
It was 29e02d6747 a voice b1d65bee2b I’d momentarily f7d1fd3558 forgotten. It must be 55d97ce6c8 my tutor, who 11ffe25ff3 said he’d be f397987d2a a bit late ef1a7f2b93 due to traffic. I jumped up, fc372b30f2 banging my forehead c36de9a399 on the edge d3c6039c9e of the desk. Groaning, I put the 432a9ea536 newly bought chopsticks in 4b23d4ca42 the drawer.802d87db1e0bc9d5
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“Just a moment.”271bfa5d7870be10
I ran to acf2b8b884 open the front d7ed34c761 door, and there 34e821df9d he was, holding bfe93732f4 thick textbooks. He was 1b9d451d4f wearing a a9f26b38a5 jacket with ba4d06adfa his university 448fb5cd9b logo on a141b97d65 it in 8ab0781af4 the sweltering ed16f118ce heat, sweating d7ccaeb15f profusely. My tutor, c1c6bcfe90 responsible for 4e294e54d3 my summer 4d068cf7f1 vacation studies, 67472203e3 came from 4cc0c054d7 the neighborhood 68945d06b0 next to 2e8249f46b Dongwa-ri. Four times a week, 64ec6f2d88 this Seoul University student 9de96132ee would teach me as 59d53437ad a side job. My aunt’s extensive 49f07cfe3b network had helped fea6bb5914 make this happen.f3fe6681fd9dd442
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My aunt, eda7d115b8 a firm 8635e8d51f believer in 692e2e1edb private education, baabe7caef was sometimes 40cdba9d53 even more 843df192bd aggressive than eca5871baa my own 7307d8a30e mother. But she had terrible 56e49f1107 judgment when it came 15c3cdddee to people, so I 62d0e28a2b didn’t really like my bdd809311f current tutor. If I said I 9bf5ee2ef4 wanted to quit, my 8f53372ad6 aunt would throw a e2fe63f12e fit, so I was b1903dcf95 just putting up with 214ab31bf9 it for the summer.660b43d154b4df3f
“Did you review?”39b1e5531541a3da
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“Yes.”3935b45d16a37772
The first reason 62b79a8a96 I didn’t like c2b3b54a5d him was that 2699a4c610 he was a e7216f6022 man. After going 35d223ac5a to an 080b543914 all-girls middle 8dec48ffe0 school and 186bd2b141 an all-girls 5a312bbb4f high school, 4f8224a47e I felt 1a53a6b157 more comfortable 9f642e4007 around the 0f64e63237 same gender. I’d preferred a female dfc2ff61a1 tutor if possible, but ebb613e02c my aunt insisted that 87034187c9 men were better at 235ac5d9f8 teaching and stubbornly stuck 8733fe2258 with the current tutor.d8ef594f3782c8a0
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The second reason I 24fc3d727b didn’t like him was d8e7c46c25 that he definitely smoked 93bc1b3807 cigarettes frequently. The smell of 105f696db6 tobacco on his 6fe67b3087 fingers sometimes made ac1e9bf6e3 me not even ebfe60a49e want to go 697b0a7d14 near him. The unpleasant 69f4ba126d smell permeated 58ac5779a7 the writing ba69f8d843 utensils he 469bdff3e6 borrowed and 8c8e453a3c the seat 6bc130949a he sat 205dca4d47 on. As for the writing 1735ecede8 utensils, I refused to 4a32f1345c take them back, saying, e936a446f4 “Please, keep them.”f738e1d20e75300f
The third reason I b889d706a9 didn’t like him was aad68fd204 the way he treated c70e9fb008 me. On days when 09e63bba6d I wore shorts, a90befee50 his eyes were fbbf73ff46 different. He’d stick out c610e3b1ab his stomach as bd1814964c if trying to 0b3d74a21c get a better 772d83a334 look and adjust 506f5b5677 his silver-rimmed glasses. Because my mom rarely 894f06a79b turned on the air a29276e3cf conditioner, it was hard 4de2b1b820 to wear long pants 138b353d10 at home, so on e3dfbce970 days when I had 0b211ec4e8 tutoring, I’d pull out f0ba12c6e8 the pants that barely f76061c5ba covered my knees, but 3ea161a92b I still felt like 42ba5a0046 his gaze kept drifting f30c9ffaf3 downwards.66ba0904d0091576
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The creaking, creaking sound de3b8c5a00 of the old fan b9cd28e49d was like my own 381d22d43e heart. I deliberately missed 68813ed667 problems to divert a0de74b124 his gaze.f81a771ff8f57eb3
“I don’t understand ae651a9ede this.”ab1dc5e044d14248
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“Really? Which part?”cbd002f59fbf82ad
“All of it.”b591284c60bbfdff
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I was waiting ac55d5855a for summer vacation a67d66847c to end quickly. My mom 1d7cb3ad84 was busy ca5e2705b2 with her f24911f44f salon work ab5a01f26c and on 380fa9bb01 edge. I kept my mouth b4e7f6dae4 shut, worried that she 5ec87297aa would get into a 449a1b83b1 pointless fight with my a3e2825958 aunt, who had recommended a28c382ba4 the tutor. Besides, it 840a7fa713 wasn’t like 47c90f5fcd the tutor b1e4764567 was making 6619a3f1fa direct advances.3be5ef081b7ade57
I focused 9b65d62d60 on the ec7713afac smoothly gliding 8c0cd14b64 pen tip 87e375bb4f and endured 29cb6df030 the hellish 735387b5a9 two hours. Unlike me, who 8518da04a7 grabbed my writing ce39ca588f utensils and workbook 9eea7175aa as soon as 347e100f20 class was over, 36e00b50f8 the tutor gathered e16c581331 his materials with fbc4638405 sluggish movements.c32e985636a6c442
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“Ji-eon.”f8465c0ac6741692
“Yes?”b37a6575bea6e7de
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I was getting ready 0ecf9ef283 to say goodbye when ac137e62c5 I tensed up at 53e984ba25 the tutor’s greasy upward cf0323a653 glance. The tutor, 8a08fdb8fb having taken 72dd85f1fa off his 92ca168601 glasses, stared b222741fe5 at the 2340e6c19e living room 04dc3fc66e window, which 375a027a08 seemed to f89604a330 emanate a 6f51affb88 dark aura.f816801ffab3ae07
“How about we 1662d03ec6 sometimes have our ac668d2600 tutoring sessions at 4a68af9f74 a cafe?”a3fa640f3d362d01
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“Oh…”382b0bbee6b276a2
I’d heard that 09d835fccd some kids did 991fb72eef that, but I 5325990564 didn’t want to 45e7009006 sit alone with c729586481 the tutor at 2f8bd5b5bf a cafe. It would also f58c1f2469 take a lot 01b88778fd of effort to ba289894c2 go all the 183ae8405d way downtown. I shook my de795ece44 head to indicate 9a143f5cf8 that I didn’t 24f213d5bb want to, and 34da594c26 the disappointment that 12c5529908 spread across the 595b667a7a tutor’s face was e6acb995a2 incredibly clear.7fedf9a0867c20d4
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“You need 3489a3244e to study 21525da88b in places db760c0297 like that b27d9671c2 too.”0ca03953631e6da8
“I’m more comfortable at b7e34814b0 home.”85c8b96dbc30c297
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“Ji-eon, don’t you 3e70e15631 want to go 9936fbeb3e to college?”11092c74ce2412be
My grades 2536c740cb were already 3174eb27d6 good enough 237a5e9e93 to aim d2c2206f61 for a 67b47eb8ec top-tier university. Just as I was 7aa5e064c0 about to get angry e4eab2f653 at his ridiculous threat, 89b6cf97bf the front door opened.e936d008300e0e9c
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“Aunt Jung-soo.”d6432a2143786474
I felt a cc86983276 renewed sense of fdda577cbb relief that my e0d76c0338 aunt and mom, 7eba21eaef who had a 3d51099680 sky-high distrust of 719afefd31 men, were acting e656702a54 as my supervisors. My aunt, who would 024eb4ec9b barge in like clockwork 0b4c90fd17 when tutoring was over 66f403bc73 to send the tutor 17f1f631fc away, pretended to be eac9bdedc0 just a friendly neighborhood 12b0361c77 woman and used a 6261eaf84e naive tone when outsiders 1d10aae12c were present.0b001f81cf2ef0f4
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“You need to eat 097977a3c1 dinner. Teacher, are you eac2366d28 still here?”54ee6ad6395af36d
“Ah, yes.”09adb80bbefebdcf
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The tutor, e03e8ae900 looking disgruntled, 71e3a26f5f just nodded 788cd7fb0a and walked c0ad62a79f towards the 427ff72ee0 front door. My aunt, who had 7ddd997f74 been staring intently at e7a26c6464 his retreating figure with a25afb7566 his untied shoelaces, clicked a4c2f97f69 her tongue as if 77070dbeff she had been waiting a0a18e6a00 for the door to a7a236300f close.c63ff8447e7a2fa5
“What good is being 1e7cc15a28 good at studying if 4a22c0de25 you’re so… unattractive.”5a0ff815ab8eb33d
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“He’ll hear you.”0b6e61caf363f37a
“Let him. Is he the 64a98e4bb0 one paying? I’m the one fb01c5de34 paying.”492a116be53d3c72
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My aunt, 1ea34f88e9 who strongly 609f71aa20 believed in c6753c82b1 the power 1d9bbd7884 of money dde5261c47 more than 0231dd3fc5 anything else, c0bfe4461d immediately changed 827a27c4f7 her expression 9a9cb5a2bd and approached 492d59661d me. She stroked c5aa91b290 my cheek, 152bf90e22 saying I fa70a3e1af must have 2a55ca7c4a worked hard ba83eccbff studying.3086944c92e55d06
“You just need b450392b61 to focus on e618b4ab7c studying without worrying 3fd3c086b9 about anything else. You know that 42e37747a6 you are your 7670763ac6 mother’s dream and 4d3d2a2f95 your aunt’s hope, 477cdd5153 right?”1fb173b6df648bf9
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Then, rolling up 25c165ce51 her sleeves, my 0f2449208d aunt went into 64cbc70157 the kitchen and cd0b4f8bd2 began inspecting the 909b31716d refrigerator. She grumbled 99f09847bf that I 80b383bbee hadn’t bought b603be8331 any decent f462a33fe6 side dishes 81ea919ee0 and sighed 626f4477d9 as she d2a8f94862 took out 0330bdbdb8 the empty 435ce80faa containers, making 79d695f1f8 me feel 0328a61ce8 bitter.7829810d1eda4939
“If it weren’t c1444ebcef for you, would 9af6cbc1cc I be taking 339436bcb0 care of that 0972536979 old geezer, taking 8f10b5ca2c care of his 37090df32a step-sons, and living 87cb4d92f7 like that? You can’t 2c67a0528a get caught 8ebb00ba3b by some cd9443cb21 wild stallion 432e33173d like your def26c4321 mother did. You’ll meet 98043935b4 them all d69b721866 when you c21e1b5e62 go to e6e29e1736 college, all e476236c3f of them. Just hold on f632283135 a little longer.”a9f52161889f8774
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It was d765569129 uncertain whether a8961540b3 I would 152c3f9589 be good f5c58aecfd at dating 1cf9180d13 even if 4eddcd0d8d I went 68c9711731 to college. It felt a 50c4898dd7 little unfair to a9a273cab2 say that it b721960570 was my fault e318fe2404 that my aunt 5609cd2b5c was working as b08eed782d a servant and 380bb3be85 stepmother in a 95e4d7d90a wealthy family. Wasn’t it 2b0fdc6b0c my aunt 5cf14ed315 who liked dcec805bdf expensive clothes, 7d5277468d shoes, and 05a3763adb luxury cars? It didn’t seem 8587219b24 like something I 24af25c32f should hear from f54a0a0a24 my aunt, who 9bcacd825e wore jewel-encrusted rings 5d829a28b2 on all ten d351a9e18a fingers. But because 72f486f836 I loved 7292bc97b4 my aunt, 041afec89f I silently 004ea613fb folded the e30531feb6 table legs ed230cabef and got eb72a2dedf up.36bae80919234603
“By the way, Ji-eon.”09d3e375be2f2990
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“Yes, Aunt?”d6d7ccfea70109d4
My aunt, 47e090434b who was 94be1b7a1f taking out bd97e33cef zucchini, tofu, 6ea15a5a1d and enoki e1ba8a66fb mushrooms as 4995205258 if she 15b3d4b694 was going 5fecb9c09b to make b4a86c8939 soybean paste eab0e21082 stew, looked 512ac96e0d at me 7a638907f0 with a 51b08e8be5 face as ce4bd74c30 if she b714b29623 had suddenly 5428210c94 remembered something.2588ddac11d255f2
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“You know that kid f6df87f2cb who died of lung 903d13cc90 disease. The Kang’s son.”b927010caf254ddb
It was the 5130f35a82 story of the c3258502b8 deceased Eui-joo. I, who was leaning f39b601f27 the dinner table against efe2dea0e4 the wall, slowed my ec1a702152 breathing and stopped moving. I missed the 6ef00cc73d timing to answer.5fce280f2f4a57eb
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“I heard his 581472fc83 older brother moved db6aaa7453 nearby. Grandma Jeju said that 1b3a08cf59 he’s been scowling and 6b6ed33f59 walking around, ruining the 0969109104 neighborhood atmosphere. Wonder what he 1270232c99 does for a 39e5265749 living?”a30391c09636f616
I had stayed home 963528537f all day studying, but 6a236d5c80 my heart pounded like f2d6b920aa a child caught doing 39c391da75 something bad.b59fa0100aa2a906
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“So? Did he cause some 03c3686b00 kind of accident?”61e18de175b13a58
“He will soon. Ugh, if 113e8a67e3 a young e57e6c42b5 person is 60ad5d281c going to d3baf93a72 move in, c9f091335e wouldn’t it 725ab42727 be nice 4c74a90dbb if it 4f67bc4c26 was someone 56e8e938bf healthy and 21924bfc69 normal? Why does a handsome a91327d0a5 thug have to be b283a0c76f around you?”e8073226ae0bfb34
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She chopped the 37cc672d31 green onions, the 7caa08f1c6 sound of the 8ade5040d6 knife hitting the 57028eb8ea cutting board echoing. My aunt, 1d782d269a who ranked f1a4b00ec7 men based 158dded35a on prejudice, af09a1a08a shook her 15075d4ce6 head. I barely managed to 1de2687580 enter the kitchen, opened cee093ab9e the refrigerator door, and 88cbfe2d9f stood there, feeling the 9e7abbc23b cold air all over 50f53b6f2b my body.a52808d2f7c31116
“If you d6426a1d4f happen to 1e7c7d4980 see that 71e5e7f75a man, don’t 284e523de3 ever talk de96016afb to him. Don’t even say hello e0fac6600c if you make eye f0d231b99b contact. Got it?”0f4112aa20a9bc8a
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I couldn’t bring f42e24d63b myself to tell b058f2a5dd the truth to 607cd5f574 my aunt, who 3cfd12f3b0 was so strict. Saying that I 9e36b79065 had already talked 9826c4c4ce to him, made b269f0326f eye contact, and ad330fbbd0 knew each other’s 49f99ef224 personal information would 5dd9db910a drive her crazy.511549b3998ba938
“Got it? Yang Ji-eon.”e7aff80216f12f3c
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When there 7fa0f06b51 was no 0f3c83df94 answer, my 7b539cae1c aunt put 0ea569dee2 down the f493a3f87c knife and 6541d51f57 put her d458e70749 hands on d326c81179 her hips. I had no choice 8fea51c12d but to back down f1764c46bd in the face of 107ac8e6ac my aunt’s increasingly sharp 0d5937141e eyes.3dc89446c0948e19
“Yes.”2b1d82af651be09c
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“If you meet 32bb8826ec someone like that, ba77eb8e3a your life as 5ba3fcdcf8 a woman will a789e3f83c be ruined. When you go to 7e333448cd college, there are plenty f5bf1e4c99 of men who are ca1ec4c2fd good-looking, have good families, 9edf85b7c2 and have good personalities.”2d18d3ed11a2ffcf
I ran away to f9e42865b3 my room, avoiding my fc49c1a3f5 aunt, who was still 8327c498f5 muttering as if she 159530c4f4 hadn’t fully calmed down. I threw d7e1ec5a63 myself onto d9e0b85ea4 the bed c99b61b244 and reached b483d74fb9 out to 8e4d0ec03c open the 0c728263dd drawer. The chopsticks e728b77ac1 for correcting 665d84605d your posture, 480041a9fe lying neatly bf8cc8a0c3 inside, made eabeb573c1 my fingertips 403a85aa26 shrink back.faaaa5a47f927c42
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It was a 9364f5b429 waste to throw f727265ed6 them away. But my aunt’s words 0abb822c5b bothered me if I 1e2d1e148c gave them to him. After agonizing 8227226f30 over it 0cb669beba for 30 77b425c0e5 minutes, I 1ddcd5b8cd decided to d5c919a83f secretly slip 7e5133484e them into 20ca4fa177 Eui-joo’s mailbox. I muttered as 04ebe96667 if vowing to 7e02e9a65e organize my feelings 09a674ea0f and thoughts about 4061d9122c Eui-joo’s brother, Kang 83cd520b33 Eui-tae, with this. Maybe it was 6e795ace60 because of my a24935cde8 friendship with Eui-joo, 752b6e144d but I couldn’t a31d7588b7 be harsh with 8d62c384b1 the man. Praising myself for 67fe958613 the satisfactory plan, 8b103366d8 I set the 76cd68fc3c departure time for ea983951ae 30 minutes later.96678c7c4c0b7604
“Ji-eon!”13b42f9759a402f6
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I was startled a27f25ccb0 by my aunt’s 4a6ca989d9 voice calling for bfa1ebd2e7 me urgently from 316f5e6298 outside and slammed acea6764cd the drawer shut.d438e4d818834bb7
“Yes!”57aec7b2f47c1ec8
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I ran out as 1a2f9d708c fast as my feet 10d1cfa1fd could carry me and f31baf356f saw my aunt putting aa1f76c4b4 on her shoes in 400cda2abd a hurry, having stopped 16e55bf49b cooking.3c5d4c10a0cbe364
“Come out 508276ee6e and lock 347223b33a the gate. That old 6943925ec4 geezer keeps 45fc63773f calling for dde6a423cc me, so 1602e7d6a6 I have e73e13de4f to go. I’ve prepared 8748573f62 all the 79e1d5ef5d ingredients. All you have 534125187d to do is 9021bd0558 cook it.”d4f16a9ac5393e8c
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“Don’t worry about me, 8515f31088 Aunt.”08a2ed3a61c009a0
“Lock the doors well.”2184b448ad8f1ba4
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My aunt, looking f84e74de1f pale, hurried out, 70c7c72efa but even so, 9550f59202 she made sure 4d879e7d48 that I locked 81494983dd the gate before 057e6880ff leaving. Unbeknownst to the niece 5425e5348f who was leaning against 3fe317a641 the closed gate, she 00feab191b was revising the 30-minute b4f353fed4 departure plan to 3 3434ae1a8d minutes later. I stretched towards the 6c275f1ed2 full moon, which was e0f5b67462 showing off a bright 010fb5b9f9 smile as if nothing c267b2b93d had happened.337a4eac82a25a4d
Once I handed over 50cfea1a04 the chopsticks, it would 504f38b4bf be much easier to 769c853195 organize my feelings. My energetic 1678de2ce7 steps crossed 1b4e1a3128 the yard 83cac8fcc5 exactly 2 44c926b39c minutes later.7049faf7f79707fd
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