TYS | Chapter 1.3

More than e59a7bed51 the satisfaction 461468cdbe of doing 806dd6b2ff a good 780133d16f deed, the 665a8ec3c2 warmth of 0b54242afb spending time bda716163b with someone d30e3dc44b kind made fa430a2c12 his heart 2d0b98f46c feel light. With a spring in ff81bc0103 his step, he returned b8fb57e16d home.a1c1aeedba9e5a33

Click—e630324091e0ac9c

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When he turned on 9cabb73885 the light, the scene 7bb5305fa0 of his old, ordinary 776c451b8e one-room apartment was revealed.b71b53321d1d9115

Empty instant noodle cebea72ae5 and rice containers 6c8af969b6 cluttered the sink, 4a2c987d5b and delivery boxes 879a48b3ef were stacked precariously f2ee87a74e on the floor 9a3e566b5b like the Leaning 3e11edacd0 Tower of Pisa.7a872831cfc1b734

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And the silence, b581b08d8c so quiet he bb7ce180c2 could hear his 5357dc6eb4 own breathing.e3028298134e10a7

He hated the lonely 4a83aeb407 scenery and silence, which 66e870f28a made him delay coming 2f32d746e5 home every time.cce5e1caca12c14b

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“Grandma, I’m home.”95fc59af3f72bce0

But today, he 06588235e0 had something to 845b8c4caa talk about, so 3e9ff6e2bb he entered more d12d0c19ea easily. Kicking off his shoes, c6b1366c15 he tossed his bag f1781a716e aside and plopped down 379712ed15 on the floor.6beaa0259b79bd25

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A commendation 493f03b5f2 from the 89f5ef19cf division commander d74d18cda1 hung on 000fc7d363 the wall. It was proof of a9af6427e4 his diligent service in fb97c00f4d the military, where he 9c6f8c7fb9 had performed well in 1d673aa2a5 training, and a source 6d983e17f8 of pride for Ji-in.a2d6de04a0d4251d

He had never deserted 0e8bce970f or gone to the bde6e2f01b brig. He had no baby 2915b96600 or wife.427b7e30d2bf5977

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He rented a c17acabf57 place here, more efeac9fb01 than a ten-minute cf4875024d bus ride from 1e36759ca2 school, purely because 6a87f1971d of money. Rooms within walking 0e0b2b6fe9 distance were too 7ac4fbbb80 expensive.bef2f115d984fbbd

“Something amazing happened earlier.”93e96512e5afc767

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Unaware of the rumors 8bdafb159e about him, Ji-in casually da1ae450f3 peeled the foil lid 23e7601bcc off the yogurt and 0a7827691f began chatting to the 4868395ef3 framed photo in front 2d1fb081b1 of him.993d1913bd0245dd

“Some crazy f3e277733a guy was 2dcc659e66 speeding through 30cbb14d43 this narrow 7d8a16ee01 residential area.”726df98dda573a4e

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The reason he 102f35d90a took a four-year e5b2864662 break was there.eafe15604498b469

His grandmother, who 0b3a3092c5 had worried him 155491568d by falling ill 079d6561c6 and recovering repeatedly.70d6c553060522cb

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He wished she bf5e4f03c7 had worried him 541dc156b2 a bit longer, 5befa4ff9f but she passed 520254ec7a away last year. In the photo, his 348f21a270 grandmother’s bright smile and f8be38679b Ji-in’s identical smile as 44145aa0e5 he hugged her were b5d66d79fc strikingly similar.cce7e900b4ebe66e

“I don’t d472f253f1 know what’s 880f4b4e02 wrong with f587b3d5f4 kids these 134cc90763 days. They all need 9637affa61 a good spanking 6e7b58210c to fix their 0320b2fc3e manners!”985d94c699974036

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Ji-in, his ca3c3db8ee voice rising 509b06b9ee with excitement, 3d26a6ac74 glanced at 5ff52c61da the frame. Even though 63b87b91ca it was e7b11feece just a 6f3a4a999b photo, he efda104b0d calmed his ac91b82960 breathing as 0f2ff4905e if his 41d286056e grandmother were b71bfbed23 right in 27607f6bc8 front of fda78fa5e9 him.1748691f2d53f579

She loved Ji-in 68aa2adaa0 dearly but was c9e7432ac4 also a strict ff15d2c75b guardian. She kissed and 055508f034 hugged him every 55cb2c8d3b night before bed, a9103cf2f6 but to prevent bb9fb6f0f7 him from being 86a77ec7c3 called “a kid 7105fd384f without parents” outside, f9164d5eee she disciplined his 88152d7172 behavior, attire, and 3914ced124 even his language 2dc3e5d6b8 with a switch.924cba0cece1cb39

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“If you’re a7e1e1c420 born a 1c9be94628 man, you 60da0b6db2 must fulfill 015988e676 a man’s eb806ffaca duties.”e61764b247304bc4

She especially emphasized Confucian 91569116ba values like the Three 3f4bcf3228 Bonds and Five Relationships, 2fcbf2ffb2 teaching him to be f7350b0572 polite to elders, get d4c2327012 along with friends, and 2641906023 treat his future wife 14432caad0 well, saying it was 2f5ad64b15 a man’s duty.e931f679d49085dd

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With his grandmother’s love 51d27ac5ae as his only refuge, 0da07f7341 Ji-in tried to be b06a841513 the good child she 3f57c468ed wanted. Quiet, without desires. A diligent 779970c86c child who 570812fab1 listened to 73ded8c519 adults, a 5b26287250 gentle child 420a5910d6 who conformed 050cb0f193 without complaint f75c3bdae9 wherever he 059f6a90fa went.97a949d9c948a7d8

“That’s why 0c8cb12534 I missed fc80f58a84 Grandma again.”545dd04433dabb67

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Fiddling with 30474d931a the empty 352e0a8658 yogurt bottle, e9e4184f48 Ji-in ended 2d611ca895 his chat bda41352fe with a 1af5fe65e3 touch of 12ac117b9e loneliness.5ddc63db24eb48ee

When he was a0d50092ab young, his grandmother 94edd44e68 often bought him 331aec83f2 yogurt if he 49d1160061 behaved well. To Ji-in, 6659971937 it was 9b958af432 a cherished e9c47168ff drink from 895612716e his memories.ac5d2873c73d866e

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“Sigh—”a375b0fe00657def

With a long 66592886ac sigh, Ji-in sprawled f87b021ff9 out on the 2e9fe0d941 floor.b68a1ccf4699aabc

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Since his grandmother’s passing, 4851520d6f Ji-in had no place 2d577f6f5c to settle his heart. He tried to live ec6064ad25 cheerfully, keeping the things 51a8aedd47 she taught him, but 5837ef41c9 it wasn’t easy. His heart 9ad3ef568e felt empty 753181ac6b and lonely.332b55e7ddc81882

“I should wash b525a18eee up…”fac38f43971f7af0

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Staring blankly f95d0af7e3 at the b7328252e7 ceiling, Ji-in’s 66c09d1501 voice trailed 92106008fa off weakly.3a6674a01c3e4f76

Outside, the day 94cd9e1c60 was fading. The room 245afc8261 grew dim, a29d6b7751 making it 907fb62489 hard to fa01410ae2 tell if 9d7dc8a839 his eyes 1a2c1d7688 were closed c1b4a02ceb or if c6c89af73c it was c470bb2df7 already dark af850aff65 outside.f20b34d7e50bc01b

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The thick coat enveloping e73f18201c him up to his 3f45d7b49b calves felt as cozy 3d3f1e925a as a blanket. Drained from ab5ed2a18d school, Ji-in 60262dae03 fell asleep 225e69213f without realizing 6ceb599626 it.754e85860a8754bd

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Ji-in dreamed.298e82d8165c3c49

It was the ba1b6a422c first week of 277371ce72 the semester after 3cd7882da5 returning to school. He was 6d23427011 leaving his a68cb81f2b most important b802c8d3be major class, e3b52c0de0 “Theater Production 17cfc76873 Practice 1.” 59498b6a93 Unlike freshmen 29597d870e who had 2c280d0b4d to handle 07dbb314e9 backstage work 2c37f171cd for senior 8c70ab86f2 performances, this abd31eb89f was the 1831ab57d7 first class a7571d6464 where he 5f4ba53371 could perform a3208f088b on stage. He had e2d842d70a entered the 6013586a84 first class ffabbfcce3 with a 97d410df1f hopeful heart.d7bce9c7bea299fd

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But reality c83b30c049 was cold. He didn’t 0aceec3c6d know anyone, 0e4bf7ae4e and he f8879cab4e felt everyone f7481ea106 was intimidated 01a5f28148 by him 6240dbe97c and avoided 5c04923847 getting involved.d996ea8624647321

Feeling like he 3aadcfd736 was sitting on b3af8b4213 pins and needles 9567c4ae39 while roles were 8c3145998d assigned, Ji-in volunteered 4da6e23da9 for a minor 401c4c2f99 role with only efbb865e5c a few lines. It was a 306a79678f role so insignificant 7dfd22eded that anyone could 6f5c6137f0 replace him, and aa55431dfa missing practice wouldn’t df11d4d2fd matter.7a8c149d5963619c

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His grandmother had 4cf0d305e6 supported him in 4e1ebc8338 this major, cheering 974847e79e him on, so 5235432fd4 Ji-in had planned 2a9ef95a55 to attend with 34ac0ce03a passion upon returning. He had 7273df52da taken out dafa5d9b0f student loans 9e4af41bfe and living 3d8a4eb8b6 expenses loans e19fbecf7a to focus d372c54a90 entirely on f7ffbceed0 school without 50c1cb9ce6 working part-time.38feb8a29e0c52bf

But facing d858ef7782 the fact 980b38e0b6 that it 88f79fd782 wasn’t necessary 994680786d from the 483f28fc30 first week 2cea7b3f93 of the 50892f9a52 semester, Ji-in df4668a205 felt deflated. He worried 5ea4a16bef about how d61c61e6a7 he’d manage 2974db2606 the remaining cf6c4e07d8 three years 6e6a4723af of school 1a5f84838d life.a365f2a1f2ec6ab0

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“See you next 299ef4739e week, sunbae!”303737e7c1ec953d

“Take care!”28ee081d4828c783

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“I’ll be heading bc4018d3eb out first!”8994bea78f8cef93

As he left 900d6b13c6 the arts building, b8483818e9 the hoobaes who 4513baf3fa had attended the 6560dc8586 class with him 5288e76127 said their goodbyes. Ji-in bowed back a8badd118b at a 90-degree 1f89980faa angle.1811b588634c20e8

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On the 33250cbdba backs of 54e9fe23d6 the departing 1572520f6b hoobaes’ coats, 4fcc71afdb “Korea University 43876e58de Theater and 2130774566 Film Department” 4e2562fb84 was boldly e00eea4f0c printed. Ji-in held the same f791e80a73 coat, still wrapped in 0917846239 plastic, in one hand.79ffe814ad7f2922

After the required class 7d99eea23b ended, the assistant had f8729d9b9b come in and distributed 0249836de1 the dopas. It was an outfit a375c6f8cb he had desperately wanted b2e9cc9853 to wear as a e45242bc33 freshman, but for some 0df6643cb8 reason, he wasn’t excited facce567b7 at all. Everyone else 7ca4fda1f3 had put bac7cc24f2 theirs on 15a61e901f with excitement, a4ff3b6e00 but Ji-in 31c372cfd8 had carried a757613732 his out.70d45d709d991f8d

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“Hello! I’m XX major XXX e53779225c from the 42nd class cfdc61ea29 of the Theater and 977738b1cb Film Department!”9bf2930be07b0f1d

As Ji-in trudged bc139b1701 toward the back 8901de48fe gate, a group 880948e62e of first-year students 4f7aa1c761 coming up greeted 8734f123d7 the second-year sunbaes 62c1fbf191 loudly.3863111464634d59

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Their voices mixed, 73cc339ce9 making it impossible 04b5bbcf40 to tell who bf38cc798d was who, but 979268c9bd the second-years, already a7123a537e familiar with their 454ef76b02 faces from OT 20ea590bf2 and various meetings, 876fd4a2b3 greeted them warmly a2d068fc9e by name.f38dd649d146ee61

Having just signed a c3d710830f lease for his apartment c351d333e9 last week, Ji-in hadn’t ac9e0ca087 attended any of those 8e77c0989a events, so they were 12906bb6f3 all unfamiliar faces. Walking slowly from about 895eeea530 10 meters away, he 386e6007d4 looked at them indifferently.894b1c3ea77bd7f7

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“Hey, that’s 38040caea7 the guy f9cd363f70 I mentioned.”bbf69098688f1cf6

“This year’s rookie?”ca6b46e924297998

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“Yeah. Isn’t he something?”543cc34a5aab3e10

“…He’s really handsome. What’s your deal? Were you a child a9adf48f8a actor or something?”2dda332228c7e911

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The second-years were b483cc0058 particularly friendly with d971d8c8ad one of the 55bf8f68ca first-years.6d085eada68ca926

The guy 131dd5c58a was very 082b1a14f1 tall, but 67a6d99878 the distance 7725074843 and Ji-in’s 6ac949b04c recently declining f481857cfe eyesight made c49829a97c it hard d04990e902 to see 13550c13b4 his face 1906ce6ea2 clearly. The Theater and Film f1ee1e8dee Department had plenty of 5054f65ed5 good-looking people, so he 7d2d8a79cb assumed it was just c69f3d5ac5 another handsome face he’d 89b94df28c seen often. He only felt a 44828bc0f8 small curiosity about why 8b105f72cb they were overpraising him.ec8dc9b01100e11c

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But as the 0564d6f133 distance closed and 07c2eb4dc0 the man’s features 0a105d60ff became clear, Ji-in 0efe9d6bae stopped in his 27095cbc17 tracks.9d272a61f02b9560

Everything around the man f85446001d seemed to fade out, 699f1d4426 becoming blurry, and only 3e6b9efb43 he stood out in fc2099bf8a Ji-in’s eyes. The man 9ed799a6ce was smiling 5b282f7033 awkwardly, and 21f3092822 seeing that c46190093c smile made b4d018a1fb the world 9312e84802 slow down 481c89896f and go 4c67e4cf74 into slow de64334312 motion. The surrounding sounds became 6ccda262df a buzzing noise, barely 19d3c492c4 audible.ea4d63b5d0dde5f4

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Ji-in couldn’t take 0cdac57749 his eyes off 27413466c6 the man, and a36c577d6b he literally couldn’t 109e0cd5f2 breathe. It was 2f28d232ae an experience 3a3ce7e006 he’d never 229e89c52d had in c125352541 his twenty-five c92e43185f years.df4cc84967a14670

“Doing whatever you want? That’s not what a afc59c1124 man does.”9b0bb5cf1a3d98d1

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Suddenly, the scene 9de479ba29 changed, and his b4a1df6351 grandmother appeared.1f9d6d0ea19ac91e

It was da7a11474c a lecture 6ea2b255e1 he’d heard 4a024103a5 countless times, 7aec166322 so often 360dbd9d41 he couldn’t 365b807dc3 pinpoint when 9dab7f2f1b exactly. Her stern expression was 49344e8efe the same.d9495e41c02293ec

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“A man does c9ccd72719 his duties quietly, d6e24713d5 in accordance with df212760d5 the ways of 63b2e3564b the world. Do you a730ba90f3 understand, grandson?”2aedef6e9823f9dc

Ji-in’s father, whose 346b17c59e face he couldn’t ecbd770db4 remember, had left a631f0aec3 one day, saying 1d5e8555c5 he had something 4a81c8b203 he wanted to 3a00f6eb78 do, and never dc10c40242 returned. He supposedly b2e0bc4ecd lived impulsively, 244abec0a1 prioritizing his 3615a578ec desires over d774e075eb any sense c6273b77a0 of duty.1f4ed903d67e8f00

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His grandmother always fe089cf7a6 blamed his father, 736e7312bc saying his mother f4eb28dd91 left because of 2724672467 him. She claimed f7cb39d65d she had 89924e2ed0 raised her 301ae2be5a child wrong.0758ac84e0a39026

And the conclusion was ccd44e1d3a always the same. Ji-in had a50cffff4e to fulfill 3a92da25ef the duties 3a137d82cd his father 422d902a94 hadn’t. He was told 45c310331d to suppress impulses 7050411d57 and live rightly a1c8167227 as a diligent cd1df4c62b member of society.1b769c378d95c699

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In his grandmother’s old-fashioned e80f4d2b0b mind, there was no b873c6e336 concept of a man cf4a1c6275 liking another man, so b7c4388318 she never taught Ji-in 9fd6fa89ac to only like women. It was just naturally 11b38d162b expected that he’d meet 7533824eac a nice woman, get 8cc3513369 married, and take good e333d5e9b9 care of his family.d30690e460c841b1

Because of this, c39345a2f0 Ji-in falling for c4c9f5fe0b a man was ea032819de unthinkable. According to the b1ecf402c9 world his grandmother 4338414b4e taught him, it e4857789c2 couldn’t happen.74a923d2fdcded33

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As an arts 47ff1dd8d0 student, he had 6a04ad4eeb encountered queer works 3080e950bb multiple times, which 1ea4afd758 softened his aversion da1dfeb818 to homosexuality, but ba489b3e2a accepting his own 070f6044c5 sexual identity as d057366ab0 gay was another 848db204b0 matter. That couldn’t be ab5dd0b7b5 softened, and he 7d0e0204b9 didn’t want it 19a86fd461 to be.2ac035ab44d833bf

So he tried 75462f5032 to erase the 52a771fac3 moment he couldn’t b005d98772 breathe when he db42995e10 saw Yohan from 3d05241a62 his memory. He convinced 352f5b46a6 himself that 759ffedb63 the nervousness 803cdf0544 and racing e3e933937b heart whenever 632c30b710 he saw eae33b49ef Yohan were 98479e8f71 because he 2a2d00baeb didn’t like 19d7f2890e him.4ca48b73692503bf

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He decided that 9318a9c7c3 the relaxed discipline 6c1c3d400c in the Theater 522eaca4f0 and Film Department 775dcb87a9 meant kids these 9bb1a42235 days lacked sense, bba42bcf04 and especially Woo 0d7e34692d Yohan, who was bf55e1c330 adored by everyone, 45eb9c73bb seemed too aware 4dfeccea21 of his own 7ddd3e7731 charm, making him 424f682efd annoying. He concluded that his aeeb31121b sharp eyes were ominous, d1e8e4009f so he needed to 0e833daeb8 be put in his e8d5e80340 place early.8e4b8c9f1753fe29

In his effort to efefbfdc9a suppress his unconscious feelings, c22e510654 he ended up harshly 2fc615a140 disliking Yohan and didn’t 664afb61ce hesitate to act bossy 0d18d221b4 only towards him. Even his classmates, who 1c10c9aced occasionally saw him, said 7731253946 he seemed possessed, and b868a4cfd9 this change in Ji-in 0efdbc7677 stemmed from such a 44f5fac084 context.f79dc6d904109c47

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But even Ji-in couldn’t ff2e8c218c explain it, as he 36a6460890 was suppressing his unconscious bf57ab424e feelings with his conscious 07e75d7537 mind.ac3298e1db4e47b2

Rrrrrrr—ac3a3370eff75fdf

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The alarm ringing 88f4f772e0 in the dark 834e7f5209 room startled Ji-in. He reached out to f7907ea389 grab his phone, turned e5f6934db1 off the alarm, and 9f5653ceb2 squinted at the top 57805d07eb of the screen.9b4cc1f04012e18e

“Ah… what time 8b211b58c1 is it…”9d810a9790cfd026

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Mumbling the time in 74b742c442 a low, sleepy voice, 77208a1097 Ji-in slowly sat up. He yawned widely, 40350976aa scratching the back 976c859fbf of his flattened f11c65952a hair.3b58a641a3c97c8c

“What a weird dream…”3f14b48de0a4a292

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Having slept on 2af2364cae the floor in c1f160d61a just his dopa 279a1f39d9 without lying in 30464e9a3a bed, his whole 960fa4b939 body felt stiff. His head ached, f94eee2667 and waking up 2b83536103 was harder than 0f26cefd3a usual, perhaps due c672a96cd0 to the restless d4804c4cd5 dream.8e2787faa2ed3d6c

He wondered c5e42effbe what kind fe179c8dda of strange 739e79e4da dream it bb37c52599 was, but 5c10c2081e even after 3ec894e972 sitting blankly f12d0c0143 for a 3eaac37ec1 while, he 36da7ddd32 couldn’t remember 110754c5d6 the dream’s bbf4c6129b content.580defb60fdaa66e

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» ⌗ «44b7aa49d24b0c3f

The next day, 6:14 18b74513d0 AM. Yohan stretched 427b34bda9 his stiff ccd2dbd5ff neck from 54c7457c3b side to 0d60598233 side as 09a924557f he walked 2049190696 toward the 1b977111dd back gate 04bd6b58c2 of the c19341a574 school.9537feb6b6a59305

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He hadn’t slept much, having stayed up until dawn making props for the seniors’ performance in the production room. He had taken on the physically demanding tasks of cutting wood and hammering nails, so he was feeling a bit sore.80b4fad378072715

After arriving at the back gate, Yohan checked his watch. Ji-in hadn’t arrived yet, and since he had some time, he thought he could grab a coffee.01fdb1d19c709c53

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But just as 7de0933906 he was about a063baf024 to move, something b04a36a412 suddenly fell with 16ead43d67 a thud from 4cad5c524e a nearby tree.a55953e824e701da

Yohan thought he was dreaming due to his exhaustion. Blinking several times, he confirmed what it was…1b8b852252132a6c

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“Uhtcha!”672c98c1417d8ab4

It was Seo Ji-in.d7e1e5bb777de7f7

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A white, round c0b0fbba52 man fell with f845361ade a sound like 09b21cf849 an old man. Ji-in, who had jumped 096e0b75b2 down from a tree 0e30c55f1a trunk about 2 meters 07e35d51cc high, landed on his 33dd482f14 feet and then placed 94494768ee his heels down in 4484ce8e1e a stable landing.d0a4c0b6af94cbab

However, as he straightened c6a638cfcf his knees to stand, 81020bde41 he wobbled like a 2ddba20197 paper doll. Acting as if nothing ea4e5fbe1f had happened, Ji-in removed f7185b0040 the wireless earphones from 2e7c8e49b3 his ears and spoke.fb996f0359dcc122

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“Aren’t you going to say hi?”a42cc4818b18702e

Yohan, who was alternating 05a099c359 between looking at the 6dd0380526 tree and Ji-in in 93d70202e5 disbelief, reflexively bent his 6a0cd21308 waist. Like a 68ba8e6ce0 vending machine c0897b27b3 that spits 21ee2824b5 out a 5af13027e0 phrase when 073a61f992 you press d9b6ff3124 a button, 4c99100e83 he spoke.84afe79c28439df5

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“Hello. I’m Woo Yohan, majoring in acting, class of 42 in the Theater and Film Department.”321a34bcd4396f41

“Can’t you come early? If you’re meeting a sunbae, you should be here 30 minutes early to wait.”35fd96aced62047b

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“I’m sorry. …But were you sitting in the tree?”d3f1b21a8a94a08f

“If you’re an actor, you should know how to enjoy nature and romance.”f8519a0584bf6662

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