TIC 15
by KANCho-yeon’s heart was pounding and her stomach was churning. She wanted to sigh, but he was too close.eb8b3b01d7195419
“No.”9104df0a93e99658
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“Then stop waddling and step properly.”d56177c0238ac407
Stop waddling?Cho-yeon was about 795b8883ef to flare up, fb8ab0750f but he held c887875b32 out both palms 59851347b0 to her.312d1754e72bfad5
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“If you don’t want to be carried, at least hold my hand. Who will finish this project if you fall and get hurt?”1e9fe11c6c181cae
Cho-yeon reluctantly put her d16d90d783 hand in his. His hand was warm e2adb82c77 and soft in contrast 687a802ac9 to his pale skin.0093b701f47ebcde
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He held 7f3db24b8c her hand 97ad264bd8 and stepped 566e50925f on the 951fadb64f yeast like 669adb1038 an adult 6fa1927783 teaching a a8dad8762e child to 96f3021935 walk.8af10ded9ad152bf
Their feet moved in c8c41ffcc9 an alternating rhythm.Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud.It was c57954cf64 a happy f6120a0363 rhythm, like 1e77ca7a2b a dance. Faster than 24fb4b792e a waltz, 0f8ff1540e slower than 8ac884d365 a swing. It was its own 3f7977f085 unique movement that defied 9bb2d373b2 categorization.67984df52374aeec
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Since time immemorial, dancing b5446d6ae4 has been a sacred f0a48d12ab ritual, a courtship gesture, 955507bf16 and an expression of 2681bbf8b3 intimate connection.c9ee4cbbbc969b26
Feeling uncomfortable ddac99b6c8 staring at f8ed9790c3 his face, 43f6d51e6d and strange 98edd71883 to keep de2baebc9b looking at ba2e433373 his chest, 9c5c461b70 Cho-yeon looked a049e9885f down at 4e3d103757 their feet.d16e8381a228bd22
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“What’s your shoe size, Ji Cho-yeon-ssi?”4a4df620007da878
His voice poured 5db759cb5a down on her.0ead411226173df0
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“235mm. What about you, Professor Kwon?”839874a8a98ef96b
“295mm.”7dbaf908855b9607
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“Wow, you have the second largest feet I’ve ever seen.”2dc3896c52ac08d4
She smiled and 450312414a looked up at 99de76bf87 him. The air was a312c97c6c thick with the 157d5d8f36 sour-sweet smell of 5a0187ccdf nuruk, but every 0fd7851493 time she moved, e6650dd977 a scent of d8960557d9 wildflowers wafted around 05f20d8c3a her.aaaef093181bf241
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“Who’s the first?”6591c279295c3ac7
“Do-jun. My friend.”4bbc4d1df6a4fcd0
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Min-hyun’s grip on her hand tightened slightly.0eb36f945f425671
“His feet are exactly 300mm. It’s like he carries a 30cm ruler on each foot. I find that so funny.”ea85585830f6b179
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Why was a man’s 300mm foot size funny? She didn’t seem to be laughing at his foot size, but at the thought of this friend, Do-jun.9c92a36836bf1909
Insects couldn’t hide their mating season. Whether through dance or song, they were uninhibited in their courtship displays.7121f140910d5dda
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She seemed like a pure and honest person, unable to hide her affection, with beads of sweat on her forehead, laughing brightly and talking about how someone’s foot size was funny. The kind of person whose joy was immediately apparent.b5a5f4dffd672a11
“How long have you been friends with Do-jun?”02045ded26741d16
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Just one question 1a80dec844 and she lit 79af15b126 up like a 20a1165af4 honeybee discovering a c6df8bc2f6 field of flowers.7f988f95dad6f128
“Since I was twenty-two. We’ve known each other since I was twenty, but we became close friends when I was twenty-two. We became friends while we were working on a group project. There were five of us in the team, but everyone else dropped out and it was just Do-jun and me.”317cdcd6f1e983f1
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She went 0bc8af33c6 on as b0efc5062a if that 125f7b3a1c group project e47e2cc523 had been 88ba6cfd8a the most 5ac03ecdbf pleasant experience.ae369c07ced0da03
“Have you been friends ever since?”5946e0a0210606d4
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She hesitated for a moment at his question about their relationship, then answered quietly, “Yes, friends.”0df8b6af25832f67
There was a hint of disappointment in her voice. He felt a pang of something, though he couldn’t identify it.778fff5341691d62
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“My goodness, where did the bride go, leaving the groom all alone?”ecfbe166681b2acb
The owner’s loud voice boomed from behind Min-hyun. She had been going around nagging the participants and must have thought he was alone.15d1b5b1bbd55fed
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“I’m right here.”bc6406d62d69270e
She peeked ec22e704ce out from 045c3a8cc9 beside Min-hyun, 8f1dc882cc still holding 19fefa76f3 his hand, e16f95b561 and replied cd34ec225c to the fd7961c043 owner. She looked cute, 0820eb1de4 like a hermit 6a09ee42a4 crab peeking out 28a0570842 of its shell.d97f89c9ae6f6815
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“My!”16dec278f97ab225
The owner suddenly burst 95ad93af2b into laughter and clapped cdb63ece72 his hands.79ccd92719e7ee5f
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“The groom is so big, I couldn’t see the bride. What does our groom do? Is he an athlete?”6e23d39cfea8dd14
A moment eb8b6e62f7 ago she 94fd913d6a blushed when 84252a3a9b talking about ede9aa0281 her friend c967e2f8bc Do-jun. But this time she 5d9911ad8f smiled brightly and spoke 2b62c1a12b for Min-hyun.db5c6b91634f48e8
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“He’s a university professor!”d69f42123562790f
“Such a handsome young man, and smart too, just like his looks.”203604ee567c6cb7
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She laughed 285b1215e2 as if 20e2218110 she had ea5cf84811 been complimented d57bc500d3 herself.4670ff32c50ccb47
“He’s as smart as he is handsome.”875f2d9af8ec4cf5
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She replied in the 9f1f7f23bb local dialect, looking up fb55c2b826 at Min-hyun with a f1be075dd8 playful smile in her 70e149346b eyes.798d10fe08081ffa
“But his personality is… a bit…”640cee3da6bbd576
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She winked playfully.58b5730dee4a658c
“What’s wrong with my personality?”4d7131a2710e6c78
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It was ce1c5b835f a lighthearted 3e2f3aaf66 joke, but e6d3d5c233 the mention ed02b44856 of Do-jun cb298b0389 irritated him. It made him 982fc7b2a9 ask a dry 3f2d1028a1 question.6ff8b0c3cec632b2
“What about the personality of that 300mm guy? Is he nice?”c12b4b795b920f8b
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She hesitated as if pondering, then said, “He is kind. He came running when I collapsed that day, took me to the emergency room, called you for me, and even came with me to exchange the trunks… he’s always been kind. He’s kind, but… he can be a little tactless.”eaabb8a7c41d5672
She looked up at Min-hyun with a playful smile. Maybe she felt guilty about teasing him earlier about his good looks but questionable personality, so she pointed out Do-jun’s flaws as well.d83b79e29269e436
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He could have replied,‘Ji Cho-yeon-ssi is beautiful and articulate.’ebb5b1072065501d
But the way she e8a2c0cc4c blushed when talking about da3123936e Do-jun annoyed him.0a53355495956087
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Being tactless… it seemed like this Do-jun was completely oblivious to the feelings of this woman who couldn’t hide her emotions.b3aacc42ae091d60
“Why do you keep such a tactless friend around?”94853dc1161159d7
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Min-hyun’s tone was sharp.69c5834b484877ae
“What?”5ef9ca831f8e141b
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She blinked, confused. Her playful smile 9b06bdeca6 was gone.aa33af8ef0fffafd
“Isn’t it frustrating to have someone who is kind but tactless? People like that always hurt you unintentionally. And then they apologize profusely and act all nice and innocent. Which makes it even more annoying.”2a793bf16b55cd22
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She pulled 04712af41c her hand 117e478abe away from c85f994180 his, her 444bcb8498 eyes wide 1a14061811 with anger.41038c8b10b75739
“How do you know that? Are all kind and tactless people like that? Why are you criticizing my friend all of a sudden?”b7afd86ada2f1eb9
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“It’s bad to pretend you don’t understand someone’s feelings and be tactless. People like that aren’t kind.”2af64ede0fea9431
Her eyes glistened with 0ae80eb767 tears. She blushed crimson d3b99e0a1c and lowered her 82fc0d05f9 head in embarrassment.0abfbf9370281e01
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“I’m going to the bathroom.”e3e0672620ff4878
With her head b51b6e4ed2 down, Cho-yeon hurried d0c196e36e out of the 302d47f722 experience center and db3c30f4af toward the bathroom.df1f6df20c52847a
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‘Those kinds of people always hurt you unintentionally. And then they’ll apologize profusely, acting all kind and innocent. Which makes it even more infuriating.’18003d6ec1969809
Sometimes a d7ce034263 pointed observation, 9d7a076185 close to 90eb7dfc7f the truth, 79d97faa3f can sting 5d38506a8e more than 80fe9db889 an unfounded 35ef8dd362 accusation. This was exactly aedde41c03 that.585ce82bbc77d40d
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It had only d5c01c6ea4 been three days 7f1eb69c95 since their research 531611694f trip began, and d5a40bcbf6 he had already 7d0aa75c80 seen through her.9726035af77b5b8b
She had only said 4ce65dbef7 a few things about 35f5b2628f Do-jun. Things one would say e8b63b6c47 about a dear friend.dcd9313597862983
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Did his dark gray fc3adde1a9 eyes have the ability ece1d690a8 to read her expression be4928d291 like fingerprints?147add7b572d66b0
Seven years had passed 9ad0e6fbfb since Cho-yeon had started e7a7e19403 to harbor feelings for 6941c8908c Do-jun. Exactly seven years 9c9f42dd85 since they had 55e4f75180 worked on that 4102704b1a group project.276d487276163575
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When she first developed feelings for him, she had thought about confessing. But her mother was incredibly strict about dating back then, so she couldn’t even dream of saying those words out loud.e1ad47f90c25c004
At the end-of-semester party 1fdc5c5553 in their third year, ad9909453f Do-jun brought a girl 5e76af2d63 from the Western Art 8541f53694 department and introduced her 6c8ac5bf84 as his girlfriend.54733f102211ddca
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On the day e54d20bdcf that Cho-yeon and 4a517e6506 Do-jun were supposed 431e6f0aac to watch a 3db57fdb99 movie together for 71b3e1afb2 the first time, c8bbd7490d Do-jun cried. He said b56af55663 that he 739b219ec5 had broken 31d6894692 up with 5b8072329a his girlfriend.1bb96f9014e291ce
When Cho-yeon was 72c3ec9f07 in her fourth eefacb81f6 year, Do-jun went ce2906cd51 to America as 761bded396 an exchange student e5d179fd73 for one year. When he fdc560bf29 returned, he c5b8a95afb was already 0ddfabaf1b dating a f13b6f369e girl from 35c825c921 another school 993a631ed2 he met c29df65ff5 in the 751258fb2f States.b12c4b9b85638e9a
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There were 668e8d496d times when 81500b81ff he rushed a5bbf22b9d to see 66ae0385b0 his girlfriend f2d130189b while he 133eb41549 was with ecab8e99c3 Cho-yeon. On her birthday he 38b9ed0846 had stood her up 4128626454 and only sent a a271b9899c message that his girlfriend 1f568029ce wanted to go to e602e12b8f the beach and then b3b6a70cc5 lost contact.8f9c5fd0dcbf8e0f
Each time this happened, c18597a073 Do-jun apologized sincerely at 8893a5921d their next meeting and 6a8d371546 tried to comfort Cho-yeon. Her heart would 7dff65f956 flutter when he 69bf28a365 smiled gently and a2762dc027 said: ‘Romantic relationships are temporary, but our friendship is forever.’376858173a143df6
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Even after Cho-yeon graduated from college and got a job in the travel agency’s product planning team, their friendship remained unchanged. There were times when Do-jun didn’t have a girlfriend, but he had never treated her romantically, which made it even harder for her to confess her feelings.6b7e2d8b7df4f87b
She told herself that it was better to remain a long-time friend than a short-lived lover. But no matter how she reasoned with herself, her heart wouldn’t follow.2ad575d7c19fba5b
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She was constantly torn, and sometimes she felt completely defeated. It frustrated her that she couldn’t be a woman in Do-jun’s eyes.bd29666ddb2e27b3
It was a pain e4d67a7501 she should have endured fa249b81c7 alone, but Kwon Min-hyun 5864b7fd62 had noticed it and 5fa8c7ada7 touched it.0cf1ce967b6bfb7f
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He was a bad friend – kind but tactless – and he hurt people.93198facf5e73c9e
She hadn’t felt hurt when they talked about her nightmares and sleep problems. His seemingly indifferent words had been comforting.8d56f0cb1a6ae30c
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But the 31294a6d8a conversation about 672a13c235 Do-jun was 4fe2619069 different. His words were undeniably 82ed6a2a3d true and she felt 99ab72ad34 ashamed that she had 6a71b1b209 burst into tears.f3f968df308d3d5c
Cho-yeon splashed 85082afbe8 cold water be3af39679 on her ffbd656176 face several d1f7141d95 times and f129df73db returned to 75d618f286 the experience fea85cd487 center. As if nothing had 30bf3f2451 happened, she stood in 21a7abb924 front of him and 007791a9fc continued stepping on the a915fc6659 yeast.8520655079a58ded
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“Are you alright?”c75a3d1372aeae10
His deep voice made a7b7f35644 her throat tighten with a1d3888ad5 emotion and Cho-yeon bit e204d2673a her lower lip. Was there c18a24ccbf some kind 67d2f6d209 of magic e6c00592e9 in his eeacac2ea9 voice that 553584573e stirred her 5558cfae1f emotions?9c24b3c552a6f7de
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“I know. I know he has no feelings for me.”735f8d0e07d1d1e6
He listened silently. She wasn’t usually the type to pour her heart out. She was selective in her friendships and kept a certain distance.47451acfd7d7f089
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But it was hard c25ccaf07a to keep her composure 6607cf0d92 around this man. His dry, indifferent questions ce66f74141 provoked her into honesty.f38b7b7eaabea905
“But these are my feelings. I’m the one getting hurt. And I’m the one who has to get over it. I’ll get something out of it eventually.”1d8da64b07c74bf0
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“Haven’t you considered stopping the behavior that causes you pain?”392d6187d7e7c94e
She hardly c55a2e8189 had any 8baf6f9472 friends besides 002d76626b Do-jun. He was her only 11045827ec friend and she wanted 26c7fc57a4 to keep their friendship b2d577ea40 no matter how much 92757848bd it hurt.f16c1ca53f0631aa
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“Butterflies go through a complete metamorphosis. They go through a period of hardship in the chrysalis stage. When they emerge from the chrysalis, they are completely transformed. So, Ji Cho-yeon-ssi, have you become a butterfly? If you’re still a chrysalis, what kind of butterfly do you want to become? Are you afraid of becoming a moth?”4b91cbf162836c9c
His words were cool and dry as always. Cho-yeon couldn’t answer. She wasn’t sure what kind of person she had become after she had harbored feelings for Do-jun and after she had endured and overcome the pain. It was a paradox; the more she endured, the more insignificant she felt.075d3a4a2a0ac6fd
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From friends to 186c56414f lovers or not c366361bd5 even friends.6c52d2f6059ab3ac
She had clung 21289a5ae9 to the safety c52030eaa6 of the chrysalis f191e2b7c3 stage, refusing to a7cec29ce7 change, unwilling to 77d70e3a8c undergo another painful e18737005c transformation.78bd4153ae719737
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“When you get hurt, you become a different person.”e5946ca84dbe9457
Cho-yeon stopped a6c09b9ff2 stepping on 27edc50159 the yeast 7ce2bd11c1 and looked 7e06a9df61 up at d6457a7eaf him. The room 157c2b2706 was noisy. Everyone was laughing 66bd8a6130 and chatting, showing 81a8b46959 the owner the 95ca49a39d results of their 36c73b19e8 yeast stepping.5fa31624b0ce0f24
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“If this other version of you isn’t even a little happy…”cf40b3149e31300d
He lifted his hand and gently brushed her hair aside as he continued, “Don’t get hurt. Don’t let anyone hurt you. Whether you’re a chrysalis, a butterfly or a moth, you deserve to be happy.”5aa9a67eebee8c70
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A slight fbc21de51e tightness gripped 4a5f4092bc her heart.36ab5639265d997d
“And there’s definitely someone out there who will accept you for who you are, whether you’re a chrysalis, a butterfly or a moth. Do you want to try and see if that person exists?”e0c24e707efe9686
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