SB Ch 30

“I have something to tell you tonight.”f6412ddee1d01b3e

The remodeling of 6d87128c5f the 42nd floor, 72e166fb33 which had been b320c586a4 ongoing for over 75bf9779c8 a month, was b999c235f6 perfectly completed. The timing was 887182f1f3 good. It was Christmas 7b1b08ceb4 Eve, a perfect 5b7842bf5f day to give 56ec907a0a Haeyoon a gift d99ce6f07d and confess his 08eb24a29c feelings once more. Chae Beomjoon had 538cc32146 planned to show 4375221a51 Haeyoon his place ec82654d55 on the 42nd b5b5118430 floor that day 5eecd751a7 and reveal that 7d6f08d204 it was where ef80c45e0c he lived.fc1af81a25ebcc0d

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Moreover, thanks to his db9c96a093 quick actions since Halloween, 08e152de57 the position of acting 07cdf1ffbe director of the Suyeon d07630d5f8 Symphony Orchestra had already 0341363135 been passed to the dd739ef4d7 head of the performance 96cb96f032 planning team by December 6f3ae67de3 21st. There was 0166f5a437 nothing to 22fdcde255 hold him a60c8e1f85 back anymore. Chae Beomjoon decided to 5e0b7ee85b candidly reveal that he 0732c62b1e had resigned from the 711f18b8c5 acting director position. He intended to say 9b5de53a0b that he was afraid 6640f98498 to be honest when 4194236f26 Haeyoon had spoken to 99296bb54a him on Halloween, that 8e037faa5c he was sorry, but 0da97a3c2e now that he had 3fd299c4c1 resigned, there was no e9e38aa139 need for Haeyoon to da60bf0466 worry.85edb3a7e37fa765

“Haeyoon, are you listening?”7304a24f08484c9a

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But Seo Haeyoon wasn’t focused on the call. It was at that moment of silence when he called out his name.528a81040f1d830c

“Beomjoon, you haven’t lied to me, have you?”fbb886ee65ba2856

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Such a question was thrown at him from the other end of the phone. Instantly, memories of being scolded by Soo Seonhwa when he was young flashed through Chae Beomjoon’s mind.fee83fcf6f054887

“Jun, don’t you have something to tell me?”435417b5ee71ecb9

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The moment 1beed5649b he heard b8df529310 that question, 41ad21704a flashes of 6783aa7fd6 his misdeeds 91a1019da9 passed before 5bd933799f his eyes d035dc2492 like a 9ec6b951bd lantern, and 92713725ab the subsequent 9ba473a673 discipline from 851595fe29 Soo Seonhwa 4f356fd450 had been fa1ff92c05 quite tormenting 2993e9dc2c for Beomjoon.8ff0e97309ee6c92

So, it 5f371a8a19 was natural f3b6262c5a for Chae 82b5421a9c Beomjoon to c17b5bfbac mentally list d982ba98ce his wrongs a587ccbd6c when Haeyoon db29d5d579 asked. However, to be 62098c65d7 honest, he had deb82bd7ea hardly done anything 6629412a0e wrong to Seo 88f954fb53 Haeyoon.8f87a6833b1b8525

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Except for secretly replacing the tasteless hot sauce in his house, throwing away a condom that didn’t seem to belong to Haeyoon without permission, and accidentally breaking a cup and replacing it with a similar one, nothing else came to mind. Thus, the recollection was brief, and he could answer quickly as if he hadn’t even thought about it.89929e05940af752

“Why would you say that?”2734519de0dab3de

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The only significant 1b58f3d3e6 wrong Chae Beomjoon 2c1a6fae5b had committed was 61b8aa0969 hiding the fact f88a5c2a6e that he was d54d9dd722 the acting director e420ffd0a5 of the Suyeon d0db7672fa Symphony Orchestra. However, it seemed Seo 342a3e4e53 Haeyoon had somehow learned 8b97fb0f40 about it. Otherwise, there was ecd6e2d107 no reason for 9f29dd6427 him to ask 417121fce1 such an abrupt 6d887088db question after going bc7abf05b5 to work at b1a3fa76d2 the grand theater ced1b8b785 without any issues.4e1c8396b4967483

The information must have leaked, and he was going to talk about it tonight… At that moment of silent sighs, the conversation they had after the Halloween concert in October came back to him.a800bcc63768bf25

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“What if I were the acting director?”1a71b4cd481ae875

“What?”48a410699f629ce4

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“If I were someone who could promote you to a soloist with just one finger?”14e7601008359dba

“What would I do? It would be over.”ce3ec2fbe4810cb7

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“Over?”b9ab9f32006ae6b4

“I don’t date people who can exert power over me. I don’t have sex with them either.”e03a73dad7491ddc

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Over. The moment he b5ebda201b heard that word, f4b7b31afa he still remembered dee14e077d the sensation of 68b5e70464 cold sweat running 883c47ba40 down his spine.549f3d7ced977445

That day, 93c1be6772 Chae Beomjoon b2cb3f5020 decided he f471cd626b must not 9a4d709389 let anyone 507cb70d09 know he 6800c61638 was the f807027cc7 acting director, d62f87558b no matter 0c1fb51a0c what. He also resolved eff62352d6 to resign from 1b3ee8c979 the position as 63a66489a2 soon as possible. Thanks to this, b3e9ec3f6a he managed to a8eadd81a6 persuade the head 09cd13f20b of the performance 6607eaf34c planning team swiftly.391917d8ee95eebe

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But to be found out before everything was neatly settled… It didn’t feel good. If Haeyoon heard this from someone else, it could lead to a very awkward situation. Feeling the crisis, Beomjoon fell silent.be47a9366b80dba4

“Is there anything?”bfb7aa1ac935e8f9

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Haeyoon prodded him.ce57e893b678cbf2

For a moment, 1c05773a48 time seemed to 15ae21a9eb stop, and in 83a152e3cc his blurred vision, 06e05178b4 Chae Beomjoon felt 68d9d4e657 his thoughts racing.6ce25795e3eaf66d

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Is there anything, nothing…3b096c179d4ddad3

If Seo Haeyoon had heard the exact truth from someone reliable, he wouldn’t have asked in such a way. It seemed like he wasn’t entirely sure about this matter either. Maybe telling the truth now would be the best choice. After all, if he learned the complete truth later, his confession would turn into an excuse rather than an explanation.0e45ce45803ee9be

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But remembering how Seo Haeyoon had mentioned “over” back then, revealing that he had been the acting director would likely have a significant impact on his feelings. It could shake Haeyoon.d4a10c9da234e87e

However, today was the start of the year’s biggest performance, a mini-concert with Jin Suryeon, and it was almost time for the first rehearsal. So, instead of confessing his uneasy innocence and confusing Haeyoon at such a crucial time, Chae Beomjoon chose to trust in Haeyoon’s trust in him.82adfa94826c80d8

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“There’s nothing like that.”7f9380d3dab809d0

Haeyoon let out a small sigh at Beomjoon’s firm answer. They then continued with casual conversation before hanging up.0ec80ec3b980d6fc

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Looking at the darkened 67fe10cf4b screen, Chae Beomjoon felt c6b0d15497 oddly uncomfortable, his mouth cc4b078bc6 dry, anxiety swelling unknowingly, f5da221abc and sweat on his 6ee2e848dc palms. He paced around b7cf0b4df4 the living room ea3beacf1d for a while fbb675535e before finally picking 7bd7f5f0c1 up his car 0bc352d5f8 keys.6c70294baefd5a26

Feeling uneasy, he planned da4b598a33 to meet Seo Haeyoon c324825092 and give him a 5e8c4ee353 hint. Whatever he b1fc2a732e had heard, 750b88afde whether it 4ca51af6d5 was true 2267e4eeb9 or not, fb584c3725 he had 7fc7df733c always respected d0d014d9a7 him. That was af62f9301e the only 4899693b2c truth he 885617a0bb could stake 02ee37c567 everything on.24e181173300dc52

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He thought Haeyoon d89e84d07c would understand if 4d95073c7d he said that. Lately, Haeyoon had been 9a9cbb3b85 listening to Beomjoon a 934b285efb lot.5e1439a3baca26e2

But after parking in da7ff5fa02 the lot and receiving 2da85a4635 a call from Haeyoon, 9b3f8bb4f2 Chae Beomjoon realized something 8ffc772cec was seriously wrong.9892cbe6c03cb6a2

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“Come to the 4th floor. I’m on the roof.”c7bbb3ac3205677c

It was a febf2ee333 voice colder than 4285d5e1e9 he had ever 35cbb5d0ed heard. Even when there 5f9350157f was a misunderstanding 2600f35ee9 at the club 39d56f9037 and they argued 3c853525f4 with Yeon Juheon a9f49c11bc by his side, 60e7c9fd4e Seo Haeyoon had 6a9baee4c1 never spoken so bf9ccee13d coldly.356502a26d4228ec

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What is it? Is there something else I don’t know about besides the acting director issue? Surprised, he hurried up to the 4th floor. Although he brushed past people, none recognized him since he was in casual clothes, unlike usual.4c03afb57d700af9

Finally arriving e844135961 on the 0f0858d951 roof, stepping 97e92dcf82 into the 1a70e2ad69 garden where 1b54dfba58 the wind 8c0c02baa5 was howling, 00e9210351 he immediately 25a79da187 sensed the 63d1d7cdaa gravity of 887c3b9d85 the situation 09a392f866 when he 496a6f92e9 saw the 07be352862 rigid Seo 4b1a98bb2c Haeyoon.651dbed91f2237ea

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What is it… What on earth?6302596ac706fbc8

He had thought Haeyoon wouldn’t accept such a relationship, but Chae Beomjoon had never done anything to harm him.876aeb38e721ac93

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The approval for Haeyoon’s admission was done before he knew who the applicant was, so although he felt guilty for the slight deception to hide his identity, he was still upright. He thought Haeyoon would understand once he explained.5ff5c4f370abf119

But Seo 136a286656 Haeyoon looked 8750aaf9e5 like someone 4147808160 who had 9923aff827 received an 1a211a4e21 immense shock 3372a188f2 from the 9801154a00 fact that 5e6234ffda Chae Beomjoon aacba1bfdf was the 852eb2b1dc acting director.086fb5d392928778

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“The director is you? That’s you?”b491fca3300d3ba1

The look of c80dbba736 hostility in his e194161b3e eyes was something bfd2a6444e he had never a0d933f186 seen in the 00dea2f4c2 four months they f5711a87f9 had spent together.a46b7b4253fa34bc

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A face that doesn’t want to listen to me. Eyes that don’t seem curious. An attitude that shudders even at the touch of a fingertip.fa96dabae5b1c0f7

“…Do you have any intention of listening to me?”61ba0db58b6eaadf

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All of it 674de96b49 was hurtful. Even at the a8dbff6e2c moment when he 1a45f94549 confessed his feelings, 9623184a1a Chae Beomjoon was bcec5772ac clearly hurt by d4170b2ea3 the intense rejection 21a67030ef he received.abda4bf031a2ba55

Of course, he understood that it was a situation that could make someone angry. But he couldn’t quite understand why Haeyoon was so extremely angry. The emotions that Haeyoon was showing seemed several times deeper than Chae Beomjoon had thought.953bd2d5f57d8d56

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There was certainly some big misunderstanding between the two of them. If he put his mind to it, clearing up that misunderstanding wouldn’t be too difficult for Chae Beomjoon. But the problem was that it would take some wrangling to get Seo Haeyoon to quietly listen to his explanation.67895af4d7b50316

Chae Beomjoon had already experienced Seo Haeyoon’s stubbornness. He knew that if he tried to explain everything now, Haeyoon wouldn’t be able to attend the rehearsal in a normal state. That’s why he wanted to let him in.6cd4d4278560195b

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“I’ll explain later, so… please go inside. It’s cold. Your body is frozen.”f1821b09ffc94d38

Knowing how hard he had practiced for the Christmas performance over the past two months, he didn’t want all that effort to go to waste.0830861d05332dd5

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He didn’t care if he was misunderstood. Those things could be explained later. But lost opportunities don’t come back. Chae Beomjoon wanted Seo Haeyoon to deliver a perfect performance today as usual.7eff920e35ca6ed1

“Don’t contact me. I’ll kill you.”dbf929fda930d252

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When Haeyoon aff37fee93 turned around f0014182e0 and said 2d30c63648 that, Chae 3e6d5db829 Beomjoon wanted 4781cd2621 to kneel c3c456f9a3 impulsively and 82e8806ef8 shout that abafefbae8 he was 31bc7aa79d innocent, but ab6b0b279f he held acd539001c back.b223f61279cca4a9

What mattered was 55c4dad328 not his innocence, 1fcb94a459 but that Haeyoon 3a2cd3c69b safely finished the 37323579af performance.079c0af3bb23f70f

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That’s why Chae Beomjoon didn’t attend the two-day performance he really wanted to see.bbf3d1e621d7286d

He stayed 23e7f465dc home alone 283ef15c60 throughout the 4dbbc5326e performance, thinking c17629a9a6 he would 907f03b841 regret it d5e83cc55c forever if 4620439f2a he ran 1ea2dfe84e into Haeyoon 31f78c7bad and made e55e71f882 him waver. It was a lonely 8d61e2dae6 Christmas.641349dbd439aeb4

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Monday passed, and f9220c5d84 another incident occurred 820113f121 in the organization, 2f0a0c52e6 requiring urgent attention. By the time e749736833 he finished handling 597fccf785 it, it was 9b8146ca82 already evening. Although his body was 839ecb0ef3 tired and exhausted, his 484eadd4e4 mind was clear. In fact, d2b2bc8236 he was cb4fa7e104 eager to afe7bbd9eb apologize to 9a3f306758 Haeyoon, so 33d06539c7 he headed 1ef2842022 straight to ab20b4d975 his house a757230b92 after work.54eb6da02b2c7c91

─ Who 7af64fc4fd are you c0777dd6eb looking for?6893fe644ec05e77

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“Ah, that…”893f1158472bcac2

But when he tried to enter Haeyoon’s apartment parking lot, his vehicle’s registration had been canceled. Realizing that Seo Haeyoon had removed him from the resident list, Chae Beomjoon bit his lip.cbcf9e7193824c7a

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He was quite a47a210191 upset. In fact, 5c37b0a510 he was 5715b16749 scared. He thought he could 8ef0c3f613 clear up the misunderstanding 35b39ae0f0 with a conversation, but 63bbbc6ef3 Haeyoon seemed really angry.9b9c74e432cfbdb0

If he wanted to be hit, he would offer his cheek. Chae Beomjoon made that resolution and turned the car around. The saying “more haste, less speed” seemed right.16a129eaf27e581c

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He held back his urge to call Haeyoon immediately and headed home. After parking his car, Beomjoon quickly walked to Haeyoon’s house without having dinner.c90e79cfee83f4d9

Fortunately, the common entrance password hadn’t been changed. Did that mean he was allowed to enter? Feeling a slight sense of relief, Chae Beomjoon took the elevator to the 14th floor where Haeyoon’s house was, took a deep breath, and rang the doorbell.e23173199a0d0152

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Ding dong. The sound of 77f96dbe90 the doorbell echoed 9471f01102 in the common 5163947cfb area.0672c5f3b270fd2f

“……”4b609c25767b7b63

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But Haeyoon didn’t answer the intercom. He didn’t open the door.12809f6f236310ec

…Did I do something that wrong? In the approaching confusion, Chae Beomjoon struggled to regain his composure and took out his phone. He called Haeyoon. Before the signal could go through, a rejection message came.474e3efe4be3bb10

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Blocked?71951e72298b1fc1

His long eyes trembled.6ee01f4bb52a6e77

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He thought that 453bfb0e0f if he contacted 9cf8b5d28a Haeyoon around Monday, dc7ff9a58b he would receive 595a51bb49 a call while ced9c9db98 Haeyoon was angry. Then he would grab 0f87096ab7 his pant leg, completely 9c5a986c12 calm him down, and 96a54b9f4a prove that he had fc986bf479 no involvement in the cb0edd359d piano quintet since his 26254d3398 enlistment and was innocent.7f1d1b48eba97fd7

But now he couldn’t even start the journey of reconciliation. Because Seo Haeyoon wouldn’t answer his call.517669dc205af946

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21:386555ad2e1fc5d9ed

Haeyoon, there’s something you’re misunderstanding. I can explain everything. So, please answer the phone. Okay?da46ae6526a6adbc

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Although he sent a message in panic, he didn’t think someone who blocked his call would leave his messenger alone. He had no expectation that the “1” would disappear, and indeed Haeyoon didn’t read the message.bf7a9fb4d8b3ae21

That day, Chae Beomjoon waited in front of Haeyoon’s house until midnight before returning home. If Haeyoon’s anger hadn’t subsided yet, he thought he would give him a bit more time. Knowing Seo Haeyoon’s temperament, he thought he might need more time to calm down.965d8f633b77b597

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But despite his 3ffd0f8938 resolution, he was 335a8a24e3 anxious.4c01fed013dc0f27

🔮🌙882f03c5d4e6a0cc

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010-0000-00007e137ab08ef779f6

You’ll die if I see you next time, f***er.e4ae86bd8a18984f

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On Tuesday, he received a text message with insults from an unknown number. Thinking that Seo Haeyoon might have changed his number, he called with a glad heart only to be met with Ahn Yewon’s cursing. Somehow, she immediately cursed at him, saying she was stupid for supporting a scumbag like him while Beomjoon was apologizing and trying to say sorry.075b03b504cfc32e

─ …Old man, be careful walking at night! I’ll really…!d2dfab352458bb56

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“What about Haeyoon? Yewon, is Haeyoon okay? What’s Haeyoon doing? Where is he? Please, just let me unblock him once. I have something to say to Haeyoon.”27a66831d6fef910

However, Yewon didn’t listen to his pleas at all. Beomjoon begged Yewon to tell Haeyoon, to let him have a conversation with him. Of course, Ahn Yewon didn’t listen to him either.338a083850b732c6

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The two ended 19f485a918 the call without 95a5a3a8ef understanding each other, e67d7ed642 and Chae Beomjoon, 14e18de65c who sent her 43554e84e8 another message, was 6a1a338aeb eventually blocked.844d2907d15d510b

It seemed like he was in deep trouble….1886250aff6bf82a

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After that, he was in a daze all day. Shin Kyoyeon, who couldn’t bear to see it, subtly suggested that he might have dementia and should get a brainwave test.b28fcd1cfc091c71

Refusing that annoying suggestion, Chae Beomjoon kept checking his messenger. Knowing that the “1” wouldn’t disappear, he couldn’t help but check continuously. When he scrolled up to see previous conversations, his heart felt heavy seeing Haeyoon’s loving replies from a few days ago.5117fb2de38200a1

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18:11a5f45b9329048a8f

It’s late, so eat first.5c5fd6bf2c69c19f

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Robberb7cc819cf38d32c3

No637055d64a7ab604

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18:12e53023cab0dc8a41

18:131a3831d1f6da464b

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Are you? You should eat on be16d32c29 time.238bcb3f35296679

Robber87bbb91b4786f036

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I have no energy, 71189031c0 feed med63a8061f58109de

18:15dd692809905ce19e

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18:1599f1fb1279591ee2

Only when it suits you, right? Okay, I’ll be there as soon as I can 😉daef6f9dd51ec445

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He couldn’t understand how someone who was so cute and affectionate could change so suddenly.ed8f349862175117

Am I not understanding 6839db92a9 the situation right now?69183862a974a434

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Chae Beomjoon fc6eb0e337 spent a 68b3940db0 long time 9ac2dbd08a reflecting on eaac96c73b their conversation 7b4f18d3ec from Saturday. Then he sensed something 136d60ee76 strange.afab644296197778

‘Mister… you put 8102014dd0 me in the 3d3d066d51 quintet, right? To collaborate with Jin c3e54a9a31 Suryeon…’aa430f61c70d43a4

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What did that 7bdabcef21 mean? At first, 92866d2d50 he thought 5ad002ea00 Seo Haeyoon 6c5828dde0 was just 0bab2fb13f exaggerating the e022fba7e6 authority of 1f05b14b38 the acting 279118d07b director. But it seemed edbb796772 strange no matter f23ce98358 how he looked 38e97f7849 at it.55bcd139decd8719

The more he revisited the conversation, the more it seemed that the word “put in” was at the center of this situation.60c90f4e323c40d0

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‘If I can’t do it, you can handle it, right? If someone questions it, you can fire everyone and make me the principal, can’t you? Wasn’t that what you intended to do?’06c35bb396c2c47d

‘What does it matter? Even if I lose an arm, you can still make a spot for me on stage, can’t you?’db4372db09295045

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Seo Haeyoon seemed to b3f42c4f0b have his pride hurt. Far more than b47b640c80 Beomjoon expected.082bc72478b9c21c

Perhaps he didn’t just find out that he was the acting director. He might have heard ridiculous rumors about the quintet within the orchestra.ee0cb8f4129acc01

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With more than d5c949790c 50 members in 91f516e75a the orchestra, there 78000d461a were always baseless f09a30f08c rumors circulating where 2a0c3bb1fc there were many a7ce55e0df people.334c2478f19861c5

He needed 08c7b373a1 to confirm. Chae Beomjoon called conductor 0072747b10 Kim Geonwoo.64ba223f9dc84fc1

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And soon he heard 948485ab95 shocking news from him.6d33bd7f27ef0cc5

“Pardon?”c850890bcf47c562

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─ Oh, can’t you hear well? On Monday, Mr. Seo wanted to leave the quintet, and I refused.b4e5ef9518b4ef50

Leave the quintet?d895336807379a8e

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─ And… I don’t think there were any separate comments within the orchestra. As far as I know, there aren’t many members who know the Chief’s face. Mr. Park isn’t someone who would spread rumors indiscriminately.9fd1c12cd46f7bbc

“Ah…. Is that so?”d72be1591e27f13e

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There was no particular mention within the orchestra. It meant no one questioned the relationship between him and Seo Haeyoon publicly. However, Kim Geonwoo wasn’t someone who paid attention to every little happening among the members.754047bd80cc5a50

So, it seemed that fdc5605777 someone had personally spouted e2bc09fee0 nonsense to Seo Haeyoon. Why? For what reason? What exactly 96101a1c1f was said 91013e86ed to elicit d36c306d72 such a 0fe7671886 reaction? Chae Beomjoon ce85713099 anxiously tapped 53dd72fb87 his desk edb70b81fa and asked.37bffac9e97517fe

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“Did he give any 7267237f57 reason for wanting to 2bffad788a quit?”7c125ae8ff5cc3ab

Knowing the reason might 4dfff2b5a5 provide a clue. But there 55c71e0e89 was nothing 46274faa81 to gain.63f75b263d6bdeee

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─ It seemed like a personal matter. But he easily accepted when I said we couldn’t let him quit without a valid reason.6dba566c0788036c

The implication was that if he gave up quitting so easily, it probably wasn’t a serious issue.f4ff5f2043757aeb

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But Chae Beomjoon d59014e0b9 knew Seo Haeyoon. He knew how d2a6e06604 happy he was 93f945d3a6 when he told 23207d3402 him about collaborating 07a9ed5560 with Jin Suryeon.9971b4889d9332da

Considering that he didn’t say anything to Kim Geonwoo when asked why he wanted to quit, it seemed that Seo Haeyoon felt humiliated, thinking Chae Beomjoon had put him in the quintet.786900bfb1ab3707

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But that wasn’t the case. Not at all.9ead797bfc7643cb

No matter how much he was the acting director, he knew that there wasn’t a double bassist in the orchestra better than Seo Haeyoon.78233c623daf2715

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Yet, the situation c1f2520107 where Seo Haeyoon 01fb6be6ef became certain that 8cd10dc1e8 Chae Beomjoon would 8a35a526a5 have placed him f2d4eda5e1 in the quintet bedb91a776 as soon as 8c73ca8adf he knew he 0201f17970 was the acting c501fb86b2 director was very 47455849fc strange. Even if f3762c9695 someone had 5e73bef6b1 maliciously said 483d919738 that, the 8a9ef52602 confident Seo 9ee657d154 Haeyoon should c4fbcc87cf have laughed f709c8d43e it off. He was that kind 9bed6bc752 of man.56af325579bc5f56

But why…4873958d41bd74e0

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No matter how much he thought about it, he couldn’t find an answer. Chae Beomjoon rubbed his face and said he understood, then hung up the phone. He waited in silence, then tried calling Haeyoon again. Of course, he didn’t answer this time either.530ac439745c7e61

“…Secretary Kim.”4ee28d0bdd05457d

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“Yes.”a44755bad9331637

Gazing at 604dbaec5c his phone, a9faaf3288 Chae Beomjoon 7d647cbd05 suddenly remembered 5f3343a6ca the difference 151d3d568a in models d27a5c3f72 and called d6ffa3e5d8 Kim Jiyeon. He asked her to 1082ff9f14 block his number and ce389d783f then called her.bd166dab6c7aef28

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“Aha. I didn’t know blocking leaves a trace.”ea53dbf0d50a2fca

Instead of ringing, it immediately showed a missed call on Kim Jiyeon’s phone screen.66b906e555a65a31

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Seeing that, f33c991c8b Kim Jiyeon 0cf1754690 grinned playfully. Quick-witted as she was, 34d57ce464 she immediately understood the adafa307c2 state of Chae Beomjoon, 425033d9de who had been staring 01bba4a1af at his phone with 918553c2aa a troubled face for 5e908786aa two days.1785529e3d569e57

“Why this? Chief, did ce5c2a1259 your lover bd1853a4b6 block you?”a77e223ac5330fd1

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“…Please pretend you don’t know.”f7ffa6f7d7940d62

“Oh my, hahaha! Really?! Why did 654433fc38 you do 042aedcb0c that! Chief, you e61679d365 messed up!”06713ebee37cd5c3

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The secretariat was shocked by the change in the light-hearted human over the past few months. They asked daily if he was in love or if he was sick, but by December, they realized he was serious about his partner and found it fascinating. Colleagues kept teasing him, knowing this was Chae Beomjoon’s first relationship.99ec696cdc24c70a

“Not easy, right?”79f0c496690df087

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Nodding to her 57162b140b playful tone, Chae ca7f605f01 Beomjoon raised his 291d6e00bd eyebrows in frustration 305ee44446 and rested his 6b947b7cc4 chin on his 1b4d747f12 hands. He stared at 50a8c37a55 his quiet phone c1619e3db8 with his hands 11e9945fda cupped like flowers.391c06eefab432d3

At least, Seo Haeyoon knew he was trying to contact him. The phone number hadn’t changed, so he could expect the block to be lifted over time, right?afdd5b570f44adc1

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But thinking positively about this was hard because of Seo Haeyoon’s reaction. It wasn’t just an angry person’s attitude. Thinking of his face trembling with disgust made his heart tremble. It was unfamiliar, being so afraid of losing someone.93a489efb26fac70

“Haa…”9cef7428323729b8

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“Chief, you know it’s best to apologize and say thank you as soon as possible, right?”d14912774ce27afa

Kim Jiyeon’s voice pricked his heart as he sighed. Did he even apologize? He couldn’t remember. Chae Beomjoon forced a smile and responded.5fe445ccc5c2c302

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“Ms. Kim, you speak as if you’ve experienced everything in life.”280676f6b7a1310d

“In a first relationship, it’s understandable. Everyone makes such mistakes once.”0ebe69ecb9e538c4

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“Is that so?”dc26d986f0148dd5

“Yes, it is. And when you apologize, don’t forget to say you love him.”1560ebf30dd71a5d

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Kim Jiyeon winked and 9c156354be smiled. Her playful smile made f182dba5ac Chae Beomjoon feel a e443ad244a bit queasy.a8329da55deaa9a9

Come to 752d2264e7 think of 0acdf9e6df it, he 581e0be569 never said 19ecbe71d8 he loved 217f3c0151 him.3afe7b5193939b50

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Even saying he liked d8829c7326 him, the first and e777e794f0 last time was the 813dd346d1 day he got caught 4d0016cc57 by Seo Haeyoon.51bc815a7f232895

He hadn’t even properly said he liked him. Fearing that a serious confession would make Seo Haeyoon flinch and run away, he merely replied, “Maybe I do.”ffd332f2911c47d9

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So maybe that’s why.de8cfcd985401a18

Maybe that’s why Seo Haeyoon easily turned his heart away from me, not even wanting to hear me out. Because he didn’t think I was sincere…4a244ab14633e045

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He had even resolved to give up his masculinity for him. He thought he showed it all, but maybe it wasn’t enough.7e4b8b3ef623aa34

Maybe he 2b7664a578 should have e27265459e become an fe9d006aa1 eunuch that 85b3c27b47 day.afc0299970225f04

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If his crotch was c1e0be0f22 empty now, Seo Haeyoon 45a7e149f2 would feel guilty about 95fb20c5e6 abandoning an eunuch and 29ede791da would have answered his 08441f299a calls.8614dc334ede4899

“Haa…”7b87b89675d6d705

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Sighing deeply again, Chae Beomjoon stayed in that state all day and then left work. Encouraged by Kim Jiyeon to cheer up, he headed to Seo Haeyoon’s house after parking his car at home. He felt he needed to meet and show his face as soon as possible. Since Haeyoon seemed to like his face, if he begged with tears, maybe he would listen…a2bf825d964d8f64

Feeling a bit resentful that he had to rely on his face instead of his heart, he was still grateful for having something to rely on. If he had an unattractive face, he wouldn’t even think of begging this way and would have waited for Haeyoon to contact him, eventually withering away.8537494bcb84f08f

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Ding dong.1c1fa5a919547e44

The bell, pressed b510c7e6cb about ten times be721eaeed yesterday, rang clearly a929520af9 today as well. But no 096318b87f one came 497808f208 out to bf934b5b51 open the eb886910fe door. Chae Beomjoon 3242ba0e37 stayed there 1b7570421e for a 0e0fe1f455 while, then 4c287f7f66 frowned, realizing 1b6bbdbe99 something.5209552f88112aac

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Is he not home?95ad4e9bfbf35a27

Come to think of it, it was Haeyoon’s practice time, yet there was no sound coming from inside. Even though he had expressed his intention to quit, he decided to stay in the quintet, so he should be practicing. If it was quiet, it meant Seo Haeyoon wasn’t practicing or wasn’t home. Since Seo Haeyoon wasn’t someone who neglected practice, it couldn’t be the former.a75719f81a0b8866

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So he really wasn’t home?3cf990416c1cf6f2

Realizing this, Chae Beomjoon hesitated for a moment, then cautiously pressed the unchanged common password. Luckily, it hadn’t been changed, and the door opened easily.d685ddf3d594f259

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He didn’t change the number, so there must be some willingness to forgive, right?cf25ca8b7e7538ec

Relieved, he 7ec45184eb stepped into 921e547b56 the entrance. Seeing that there were 6d489ec345 no shoes on the 49f8e4a750 tiles confirmed that Seo 1b5772712c Haeyoon was indeed out.8acfcd701ea772fe

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Right, with his fiery 9f67872874 temper, he might need d80668446c time to cool his 503bf91e51 head. The big performance was 61a3ae636e over, so he could 55b7801777 be on a short cef0c7649f trip. Chae Beomjoon decided d6db483aab to earn some eea6aa36bf points by cleaning 99864b48ed the house before 8649e89fbf he returned and e1ae1d79dc opened the middle 54c73f0417 door.5180e3d836b88528

But…2e8863ac2e2d4eb4

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“Haeyoon…”c12744088f70e0c2

There was no place that needed Chae Beomjoon’s touch in the bathroom, restroom, bedroom, or living room. Not only cleaning, but every trace of him was gone as if cut out with scissors. Even his toothbrush, clothes, gown, and the food he bought were all gone. He was paralyzed by this realization.f0eef383c0f852f3

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A face 49ae4df834 that had 4c0f49cc88 been slightly 91b35ebb00 lacking in 3fd34897dc energy was 82b2ce27ef now fully d19b2b1749 contorted.3224dde0fb9d397b

Even so, until b8ab423845 now, he thought ae6cd727b2 there was room 0a06309fec for recovery. He believed that 47df81384f if he opened c831f62e7a up sincerely and 233dfe0610 explained everything, Seo 9e1b6f6e2d Haeyoon would understand. Now he realized that 8ffc9ada92 was his arrogance.fdbc8cd8349401e4

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His black pupils shook aimlessly. His trembling gaze scanned the apartment, where only Haeyoon’s traces remained. Everything was just as it had been, except for the absence of his presence.32f29eb945089a8b

Unlike himself, feeling as 604d409fc2 if he had been 00ab4246b7 erased, Seo Haeyoon seemed 9eb7548aee to have handled this c2a1e9f4a0 collapse quite well, as 84021cf413 only his items were 11ab76ecb1 left in the apartment.5ddaaaaa1644bc89

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Chae Beomjoon staggered and gripped the back of the sofa for support. He stood there, blankly surveying the room, looking for any sign, any remnant of Haeyoon’s feelings.228c93032274e99e

But there was nothing. Nothing at all. Only Haeyoon’s belongings remained here…3aa0e0cead113131

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“…No, that’s not it.”bf0836bd49ccfe30

At that moment, something that should have been there but wasn’t caught his eye.cd95678d2b861da1

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The music stand 399c51934f and the page ecfbfac368 turner were gone. So was the b2c51b608d double bass stand. Those were things Seo 828a035d52 Haeyoon needed, unlike the ea97ea9dba things Chae Beomjoon could ba497f8348 cast aside.6b736cc01c8c8bda

He had erased all traces of Beomjoon and left himself from this place. That was Seo Haeyoon’s end – leaving only with what was necessary, from a space filled with memories.2320563d38812e6f

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To Chae Beomjoon, it felt like Haeyoon’s will, driven by spite, to leave nothing of himself behind.d709e0dfc0c5d41a

Why did it come to this? What went wrong? It shouldn’t have been this big of a deal. This isn’t what I thought…f7900cc90f765561

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Just like bee9f93eaf the day 1063fe08a5 his feelings 12ff2f5522 were exposed f6e1d16272 to Haeyoon, 9d597f63de his legs 987c7972d4 trembled like 28390ae214 aspen leaves. Chae Beomjoon, restless, f8b593a635 pondered while his 2e59e60200 feet tapped nervously, 5fafc74b09 and after a c1165abd50 long while, he 4af199bc89 finally stood up.9c9d2b7737af9269

His forehead was wet 7abf06705e with cold sweat. He felt like he d64df00b3b was going crazy, thinking 49e73107f2 the event was still 1669fa2490 ongoing while Seo Haeyoon 52569f963b had already declared it 71e6c82bc2 over.54a299f30db37378

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He was so worried about Haeyoon being hurt by something he didn’t know about that he could die, and he couldn’t help but think that Haeyoon, who relieves stress through sex, might be looking for another man to alleviate the extreme stress caused by him.7fa11ebd7d4a2f8a

Seo Haeyoon a304fecd2f with a 283fa2b7b0 16-year-younger, damn, 9354205027 useless bastard?cab92430f71d6f51

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Just the thought of 1e922566a5 it raised his blood 769ceeff1e pressure. Chae Beomjoon clutched e466cbfe66 the back of 1db0f390f6 his neck, breathing 42267ab895 deeply to calm 114aab8fa7 himself.5b817c63316b8012

If that situation happened, c782111ea6 there was only one f123a878da solution. He had to castrate 48f1bc6fa5 himself in front of 8977e9dce9 him.0aae41338043e105

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The documents Haeyoon had signed were still there. The contract’s effect would start the moment Chae Beomjoon became impotent, so then Seo Haeyoon would be legally bound to him.c09da5684611bbb6

“Yeah, that’s how it should be…”42ea6e1505370733

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With a look of madness in his eyes, Chae Beomjoon ran out of Haeyoon’s apartment. He dashed through couples out for a date on the eve of the year-end, arriving at his own apartment building.dc4efcb711a3463c

But instead 018848740c of going af7ae05c7c up to 2396e97288 the 42nd 6846332624 floor, Chae 759147cdec Beomjoon headed b9ab2f307d to the 7328172d9d 41st floor. To find Haeyoon a5d77357c9 who had gone 20afa14dec to seduce a 915d5aa46f 22-year-old, he had f256fe7447 to go there 63bcb2c056 first.b9e44425280b53ff

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The 41st floor, 41st floor – he frantically tapped the panel, glaring at the elevator display as the numbers ascended. In his mind, he kept picturing Haeyoon holding the leash of a young boy whose ID ink was not even dry.72cf2f8a226736cf

It felt like oil was being poured into his body and set on fire. Chae Beomjoon couldn’t bear the sight of Seo Haeyoon with another man, so he screamed and pulled at his hair.2a9f68d3e9f950a7

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“Absolutely not!”8472fbedeff919b5

Only now did Chae Beomjoon understand Shin Kyoyeon’s madness from the day Yoon Heesoo ran away. On that day, he had cursed him internally for being a lunatic who should have behaved better… Damn, did he think I’d be like this?0ebf162f7f9f194a

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Regretting and banging his 782018d5a4 head against the wall, b7e154882d the elevator finally stopped. Beomjoon got off d9cff392d1 on the 41st d57621f8be floor and started d2150090da hammering the doorbell.1ac8b84363854417

Ding-dong, ding-dong, unable to wait for the slow bell sound, he kept pressing it until the door opened. Diddiddiddiddiddiddong – with the loud noise, the door finally opened, and a shout came out.1506f044071a49a4

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“Damn it, stop pressing that! What do you want at this hour?”33ef693f75dd7bb6

A familiar face b28f7e0aa6 was distorted in f2d874db1b anger, seemingly upset 541de1fda2 at having his bc134a5f48 peaceful evening disturbed.2ad32ec772bac8a1

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But at this moment, when Seo Haeyoon was undressing a beast-like 22-year-old, Beomjoon couldn’t care less about the other’s anger. In front of Gu Seju, Beomjoon clasped his hands together in prayer, his face desperate, weakly shouting.7232d420824fe07f

“Chief Cheon, please, help me find someone…”62353499d865e93b

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🔮🌙9e9c2afb0e3603a6

Seeing Chae Beomjoon’s unusual state, Cheon Seju immediately contacted the organization’s skilled hacker, Yoon Cheol-joo, to trace Seo Haeyoon’s phone location.9bdcda20306fb909

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Once he got 9ace4f41f6 the address, Chae 0eed939899 Beomjoon, swallowing his a1b3f6a06c pride, bowed deeply 438a3bf563 and immediately drove 6ad1ade91b out to the f3a2bd7776 road.e0bed1064aed9c38

Following the address sent by Yoon Cheol-joo, he arrived at a large country house. Seo Haeyoon was staying at Seo Jonggil’s house. It was evident at first glance. Ahn Yewon wouldn’t live in such a house. Anyway, the fact that Haeyoon wasn’t found in a hotel or another man’s home brought a great sense of relief.da3c5cadb0d1e45b

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Chae Beomjoon looked around and, spotting an empty resident’s parking spot, turned on his hazard lights. He intended to park haphazardly and press the bell, eager to talk to Seo Haeyoon immediately.0028902614032cbe

“Uh…?”d94daacdd51ebc12

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But before he could properly park, the garage door of the mansion began to rise. Who’s coming out? As Chae Beomjoon looked around the alley, he noticed the headlights of a yellow SUV inside the garage turning on.4069954af1fd8175

It was 4cc9534a38 Seo Haeyoon.584453af5e3fd84a

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However, there was b0097db5c3 no time to fea14fde29 rejoice.914de4d23bd13566

10 PM.a271aaf0b271891c

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At this late hour, there was only one reason for Seo Haeyoon to leave his house. He wasn’t in a position to feel safe just because Haeyoon was at home. Seo Haeyoon was about to go out to find his 11th lover.8f08f93bd9e5b1d3

“Oh… no!”080dd957fef02183

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Shouting in horror, Chae Beomjoon floored the accelerator. He quickly blocked the entrance of the garage so Haeyoon couldn’t leave. Screech, the sound of brakes echoed like a scream in the alley.53c8230b376d7925

When he rolled down the window and turned his head, under the bright garage light, he saw Haeyoon’s face behind the steering wheel. Unlike himself, who hadn’t eaten properly for four days and looked half-starved, Haeyoon’s face glowed, as if he had eaten and slept well.6f89118a4a6ea027

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“…Ha.”44402cbe1eab8994

Seemingly quite annoyed, the corners of Haeyoon’s large eyes were fiercely lifted. Seeing this, Chae Beomjoon felt his chest tighten with frustration and injustice, almost to the point of tears. He hit the parking button without any question and got out of the car.a1bd9381b5084f45

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He had a 3350e8c544 lot to say. First, he wanted to 5bc4325543 say he missed him, d27354afa7 explain the misunderstandings, and d284daf603 ask who had said c05a9da262 what.9edd984acc7cc146

Then he would apologize, say he likes him, loves him… Chae Beomjoon, with his lips firmly set, walked around the hood towards the garage to approach Haeyoon.35b05d7472b5c93d

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“Haeyoon!”2d581c14262cbcf9

But at that moment, Haeyoon, glaring at Chae Beomjoon outside the window, revved the accelerator. The roar of the Lamborghini’s 666-horsepower V8 engine filled the air, as if it would push Beomjoon and his car away any second.ad728f9cf5a6f0d8

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“What are you doing?!”eaa9ffd872920006

However, instead of running away from the sound, Chae Beomjoon dashed forward to block the terrifying exhaust sound of the SUV. It wasn’t because he had lost his mind or was worried about his car getting damaged.94b1d1feff2ab0a1

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Given Haeyoon’s temperament, he knew Haeyoon might really ram into him, so he tried to stop him. If a Lamborghini and a Bentley collided, there was no way the impact wouldn’t affect the driver. He was worried Haeyoon might get hurt.c239dc85114ce1ce

“Haeyoon!”9e633b069fe04908

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He placed his hands on the increasingly hot hood, desperately calling out to Haeyoon. Their eyes met through the frosty glass. Seo Haeyoon was glaring at Chae Beomjoon with eyes that seemed to blaze, indicating he would run him over if he didn’t move.9c82a3238ff9154c

“Haeyoon!! Please listen to me…!”12df660153354313

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But he couldn’t move. If he moved now, Seo Haeyoon would certainly floor it. With that conviction, he felt he had to block him until the end.0aaecb7b728a4aa2

“Stop it! You’ll get hurt!”972ff2215555bdd0

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He raised his voice, but with the engine noise so loud, he wasn’t sure if his sincerity reached Haeyoon. Beomjoon kept shouting for him to stop, yelling with all his might.20d67249ee76842d

The louder he 08e04679fa shouted, the more e00149edf4 his frustration grew. He felt like 341a89a8f6 he was going a42c907ea1 insane with the f5244a0349 tightness in his 4f0078cfc1 chest. He really resented Haeyoon c288dec554 for not wanting to a81fc83e9b listen to him.178a55e5fcea054e

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The image of Seo 27185df8f9 Haeyoon at the hotel, c14433a50f treating him like a 007373634a rapist, overlapped with the 9155e18e05 Haeyoon in front of 539d1ec509 him now. Unlike his own d84116cd59 life which had 7a0d36778d changed drastically since 419c4df0c2 then, Haeyoon seemed 21c16fad55 unchanged. They had lived together ea5c7a5e7b for four months, but 7eeef01a02 it seemed like that 194d1afc4d time, which meant so f059a81f2c much to him, meant 00663df5ce nothing to Haeyoon, which 052d8ce587 made him feel pitiful.4b8203c2870b91b5

He thought things had changed a lot, that Haeyoon had grown to like him more than at first. Were all the feelings he sensed from Haeyoon just illusions born from his own misconceptions? Was there really nothing inside Seo Haeyoon…?55e087f1ee6618ed

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All sorts of 4f099a1008 pessimistic thoughts overwhelmed 770f3850f4 him, making his 5db059aa02 insides churn. This situation c99022d96d was utterly 55a6be253c incomprehensible.64cb16548c7478ca

Among it all, the 453d258f23 most incomprehensible was Seo ec59203c07 Haeyoon. How could 5be0f74dea he think 38b42ef65a Chae Beomjoon a8d9d28a3c had placed be923ffd53 him in 5496353746 the quintet 43da4e4fc4 after seeing acafb77d55 all his e5409d4a75 sincerity?fcd611f4bdf75fc4

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Do you really think that? There’s no way I would do such a thing… He wanted to ask, but Seo Haeyoon didn’t seem interested in listening to him.69e01e9f292166b5

It was an emotion e71aa99c04 that had come with 1e9bcc2e40 difficulty.f0c284b030364fde

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It was eb1f588546 a heart a0c465d49b he had 1b5eff09e3 reluctantly accepted.34c74a635ef66938

It was an affection b00cc4ccc4 he had cherished secretly.f044618c9676f931

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It was love he hadn’t shown properly because he was afraid Haeyoon might feel burdened, even after it had been revealed.02521c58f7e35834

He couldn’t let this first love, which had progressed with so much difficulty, end so futilely. At least he should be given the chance to confront him with sincerity.721cbf768b1f0400

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“Please listen to me, please…”337ed34841591d8a

He groaned, lowering 4940bf901a his head onto bec14ace9f the hood in 8bd729882b frustration. He felt like he a1f8a5fcd7 could cry.76fdd9e730f719fc

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But at that moment, the vibrations that had been shaking his whole body stopped with a “brr”. Did he hear me? Surprised, he looked up to see Haeyoon, who was biting his lip, staring at him.c592e637188d2163

His eyes were trembling greatly. It was different from when he saw him on the rooftop. Unlike then, when he seemed utterly cold and unapproachable, now Haeyoon’s eyes were swirling with all sorts of emotions. That was better. Better than the Seo Haeyoon who seemed to have nothing to say to him, this Seo Haeyoon, who wanted to curse, vent, and expel, was better.bdec32ac2916900d

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“Let’s talk, Haeyoon…”d037bdb0ea553a7e

With his eyes lowered, 055ca908cc Beomjoon pleaded in a b9eb78a216 raised voice. There were no other 1828ce0218 words exchanged. A damp, cold 93194db65d wind swept over ee4835d30c his head.0376ab0f9b036fb2

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After a fad549186c long while, 84ba06763c Seo Haeyoon 9903adcec6 finally turned 8ba7ad7fb1 off the c14aaef31f engine. The car door opened e6949b3ea5 and closed silently. But before 3e79467e9a Chae Beomjoon 26ee91959e could rush 87ff0c6916 to him, 64b579a186 Haeyoon had 54522cbfd1 turned around, e8362d4bae heading towards 68c25a8baa the inner 33565983c3 door of ad5bf988c7 the garage. Beomjoon, in a hurry, c307a50d86 followed him quickly.66c3b2c0ce24d9a9

“Haeyoon… Haeyoon! Please listen to me! I can explain everything…!”063d19c47ea7e288

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“Shut up!!”44537f229290b636

At the sharp, angry shout, Chae Beomjoon closed his mouth. Seo Haeyoon’s elegant face was brimming with rage. His pale face was boiling, and his eyes were fierce.26d05bec35229fd3

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That intense boiling f327220433 reassured Chae Beomjoon 532020f1ac even more.b802843aa6d31388

Haeyoon leaving the house wasn’t about emptying Chae Beomjoon from his heart. It was an attempt. An attempt to clear away all traces from in front of him to erase the thoughts of Chae Beomjoon that stirred his emotions.f2d9ac4a0e870901

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The fact that Haeyoon hadn’t sorted out his feelings made Beomjoon shout with joy.8c39d25042150706

“It’s a misunderstanding! I really didn’t do anything! I know nothing about the quintet!”e0d5c10d9ed08d3f

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“If you say one more word, I’ll kill you.”76bc0b1e1b199fe5

“…”5d8dcd1c6c59ab4e

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However, his three-point summary was immediately deflated by Haeyoon’s lethal remark. In the face of Haeyoon’s cold gaze, Chae Beomjoon shut his mouth again, trying to give him time to think.7dd232020fcbe199

When his chattering lips finally closed, Seo Haeyoon ran his fingers through his hair, letting out a boiling sigh. That sigh, which made Chae Beomjoon’s heart beat like it would burst, made him choke back his emotions.def18e98281e5ebb

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If he could, he would have clung to Haeyoon’s pants, begging. But doing so would only make Haeyoon shudder in disgust; he wouldn’t listen to his words…a0a832df5e407eb9

“…”7ba9f1433cfa12a3

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Seo Haeyoon 8f58021e4e glared at f241a665c8 Chae Beomjoon 64c62f53ab as if 48dcff1ce5 he wanted 74f8fd38e5 to hit 38d2e0dfc1 him for ddb6712df5 keeping silent b1bf1f3723 before turning 18d684a9ad away. He walked off, ef29581d48 showing his back a936582b46 once again.219a950e8e185a90

Although he had prevented Haeyoon from going out to meet some young guy right away, at this rate, it seemed like the misunderstanding would never be resolved even until he died of old age. Moreover, Beomjoon still didn’t know why Haeyoon had heard something outside that made him misunderstand him so deeply. Overwhelmed by frustration, Beomjoon shouted at the receding figure.641a659d9b2986fa

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“When, when can we talk?”3d88c7b6ec4fa221

The question must 17c5f3bde9 have seemed quite 97c075951d brazen. Seo Haeyoon 01ee1057ed turned around, aa6449db31 his face 88bfc240f2 contorted in 9f2a576480 disbelief.31926f7eb0536dc1

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“What do we have to talk about?”5ff503eed2f04210

He didn’t even expect to be called “hyung” in this situation. And now, instead of “Mister,” he was being called “you.”c9cb7176314d3e64

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The resentment he had momentarily forgotten surged back. He knew Haeyoon was misunderstanding, but no matter how much he thought about it, he hadn’t done anything to deserve being called “you.”0dd5036b9488b2dd

“At least give me a chance to clear up the misunderstanding! We were together for four months; can’t you do even that for me?!”8a8e19c070e15aae

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“Four months? We didn’t even date for two months. Don’t fabricate!”d1b08401d65f15d8

“How can you say that? If I had been a homeless person you met for four months, wouldn’t you have been less cold?”fceb5f2f19dd35fc

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“Yes! Then I would have shown some compassion. But you’re not a homeless person!”b68fd72b4a7c5f2f

The fact that he had become worse than an unnamed homeless person in Haeyoon’s eyes was driving him crazy with frustration. But while he resented him, he wasn’t angry.8e68ab03b3cc0a12

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How much he had suffered during the time he couldn’t see him. He had countless times regretted not saying what he should have on Saturday, no matter what, and yet felt that holding back for Haeyoon’s sake was the right thing to do.d7de9dd678180c37

So, even just having the chance to see his face and talk was something Beomjoon was thankful for. He even felt like he wanted to kiss the feet of Haeyoon, who didn’t immediately kick him out.d5b1b032fe84313a

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Biting his lips, Beomjoon’s eyes welled up like an abandoned dog. Opening his reddened lips, he pleaded in a voice that was almost a whisper.790a75226ed0d668

“Then treat me like a homeless person. Please… show me some compassion, Haeyoon.”fd71fb4c9ee874b1

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“…Ha.”024e02f7631e448a

At that pitiful expression, as if taken aback, Seo Haeyoon stared at Chae Beomjoon with his mouth open. The venom seemed to gradually drain from Haeyoon’s hardened face. One could feel his sense of futility.607dbbba2dbaf56c

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Seo Haeyoon stood there silently for a long time before finally taking slow steps. As he approached, Chae Beomjoon finally got to see Haeyoon’s face up close after days.76d060937dd1a378

The thought that Haeyoon’s skin glowed compared to his half-starved self while he was in the car was a misconception. Up close, he too looked haggard from days of emotional turmoil. Looking at his sharpened jawline, Beomjoon’s heart ached.9b11652cc550d183

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“…Haven’t you been eating properly?”4c33d74836066af8

“What, are we in a drama now? Stop with the nonsense and say what you have to say.”95084f6067c129dc

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However, Seo 29fc434360 Haeyoon quickly 1b681f557a regained his e41167c0fe composure. Not only that, c12d60c00e he seemed to 5e0aa6ce4e regret even the fceec9d58d few steps he 6018606f9a had taken, exuding 992ebd2db0 an aura of 52a2d71d1d wanting to go 35c8377ff9 back inside immediately.436381dc177da3dd

He looked so pitiful, putting up thorns to protect his wounded heart. Beomjoon’s chest hurt. He wanted to hold him tightly, but he knew Haeyoon would push him away, screaming if he did. Even if Beomjoon couldn’t admit it, Haeyoon would know that the wounds he had were caused by him.d2dfc8d1b93a8a1a

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So, he couldn’t hastily make excuses.3bb7a3b1b815acc2

Anyway, nothing he said would reach Seo Haeyoon’s ears. Every word he spoke would only sound like an excuse, just like it had on the rooftop…342b4a21276f4aaf

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Then what could he 7368d8a1cc say to make Seo e9ae114c6e Haeyoon listen to him? It was cefbc0f73e Haeyoon who f6dffec576 broke the ce21ddd76c silence filled a7bf411881 with such 4eef1244bf concerns.b0a02e0a9742c674

“Think of this as your last chance to see my face. If we meet again, I’ll run you over with my car.”fbb637c41b3fb99d

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It was 758076e06a like a 7e641c15ad death sentence.c70c23ecb7a97bc8

The last.5b9e7cbb26bed599

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In front of Chae Beomjoon, who was asking for a chance, Seo Haeyoon was talking about an end. No matter what he said, this outcome seemed irreversible…30eb6a8f432a726f

His heart 302a601f2e sank like 813ab0ee1c it was a4dce61039 weighed down 02b84b7550 by something cf838c1965 heavy. He thought he had 1545d773d7 broken through a lot, c049b72ef6 but before he knew f9f7950661 it, a high wall 99ad0243e5 had risen between them 241b7cbe71 again.eb6f037eecc50eee

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On the other side of that wall, Haeyoon couldn’t hear any of Beomjoon’s shouts or explanations. Only Haeyoon could open the door to that wall, but he wasn’t even considering touching the handle.981bac2eb6a502a2

No matter 4024216258 what considerations a4ae26c643 or judgments fd6feaccf8 Chae Beomjoon dcd3e778ae made, it 9f8fb1b499 was of 4a363b0e81 no use 8ae1a8b836 to Seo d2043e0ace Haeyoon right 09f4bf77bd now.42f993a0d989c140

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In this situation, everything f277e6c3ab was meaningless.60d2ab0fa20954d4

Apologies, explanations, pleas…412541d150c0bea0

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Then what on earth can I do? What should I say to you as you walk away…f5f923c70d4f262a

“Nothing to say?”5261fbd25b14eadc

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In his deep despair, Beomjoon recalled what Seo Haeyoon had said. It was a statement that had led Beomjoon here, who once tried to deny his feelings for Haeyoon because he couldn’t believe someone like him could love someone.6293cf204f8f1d29

‘I don’t think about anything. I just play as my heart leads.’526d9042273b22a0

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As my heart leads…d59cb49f3bfb1188

If there 27dc2ac72f was one 187889642d thing he 0127f583b6 wanted to 22217bf6c9 do most cddc794c28 right now, af85b29c7d it was bf6fd77f18 this.fac449da610e1ea3

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With reddened eyes, Chae Beomjoon reached out to cup Haeyoon’s thin cheek. Before Haeyoon could escape with his hardened gaze, Beomjoon bent down to press his lips to his.15925f174965a993

Instead of spewing excuses until the very end, Haeyoon couldn’t push away the man offering countless kisses.5f956e16eb4ab38d

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“…If this is the last moment.”f74d0c058869deac

It was an f5221c136e affectionate kiss. A gentle kiss 837fcfd1e9 meant to comfort 40e0611ebe and soothe the f364e6e32f wounded Haeyoon.bc3224298cb481ab

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While kissing 7995ad7735 him, Chae 0069a2f93b Beomjoon remembered 3608cf7819 the moment 217609854c he had c14ed236e8 completely fallen 70a049cb69 for Seo 326c3b98f9 Haeyoon.9374f2f791773c8b

At first, it was just curiosity. Aside from his looks and aura being exactly Chae Beomjoon’s type, Seo Haeyoon was not significantly different from the many men he had met.127fe17a6af953df

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When he discovered 427d9f7edf the man on 75e987c889 stage, Chae Beomjoon 8563a76724 became curious about 65ea02551b him. The beautiful 80510dea59 harmony this 07ff3f0dca stranger played b950a6b76c offered deep 1407ca6081 comfort to d147d9691e Chae Beomjoon.fd9579947283e678

And then, after playing a heart-wrenchingly sad Siciliano, in the moment when Seo Haeyoon kissed him of his own accord in response to an encore request…b92ab36b6dd52020

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Chae Beomjoon de8dd4c91e completely fell 1b160f38f0 for this aa3d81002b man named ccb79f920b Seo Haeyoon.b1a159867d9dd999

That kiss was the catalyst for Chae Beomjoon’s yearning for Seo Haeyoon. In the moment Haeyoon shared his breath with such a joyful face, Chae Beomjoon’s defenses completely crumbled. Perhaps, then, this kiss might break down Seo Haeyoon’s walls…04be0524245accef

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Chae Beomjoon 5c69e1aa55 looked at 9ac442ee87 Haeyoon with 8e27ac8199 teary eyes. Staring into his eyes a03883f0b6 filled with confusion, he b4c0080af7 said,1e68ae2fe40038b6

“This is all I can give you…”899abd40de75d892

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“…”ab5c53998d081e30

“I missed you.”cff25aaf6c2e9965

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At this 6de2585cad greeting full 6a4148c61b of longing, 312d5c3e1c Haeyoon stepped 230ef50ed4 back, wiping f3610c3e18 his lips ec6b3e25ca with the fc122f7bd1 back of f4fe0076e1 his hand. His pale face gradually 02e82292d1 turned red.dc9d76eaa96f3ce1

He couldn’t even guess what Haeyoon was thinking anymore. Learning from his past misjudgments, Chae Beomjoon decided not to presumptuously speculate about Haeyoon’s thoughts. He only hoped for some change in Haeyoon, for him to have the heart to listen to his excuses…e8a6eace1539c20e

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“…Is it all over?”d165a57f7ac4b567

After a brief cfced9dc4a silence, Haeyoon asked. Afraid of what would 4f4f4dd4bb come next, Chae Beomjoon 6991d7dd66 nodded, avoiding his gaze.9ec0daf7d35b8191

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There was no response. Only the sound of Haeyoon’s footsteps walking away, as if to prove his words about it being the last, could be heard.e089799e4cf3a0e1

It’s over…274ab1856b1a92d2

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It seemed like this was the end. Really, it seemed there would be no more chances with Seo Haeyoon. Is it because first love is supposed to be unfulfilled? If I let go of you and then fall for you again, would I be able to receive your love then…cacb706f2a7c1e98

His eyes burned e1a6ab8384 with rising disappointment. Blinking his stinging 317f84bc21 eyes, Chae Beomjoon 958633329c looked down at d354b8d292 his feet.161dec35f21e1068

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Should I have 5c7345136f acted more calculatingly? Should I 4add3f5698 have forced 5085661a41 him to 81df6f058c stay and c35d8fd3ea demanded he ed62d8891b tell me be0ad13f15 what happened? Should I have told 7b22b63a1f him that everything he a6608773ab said was wrong?dffad23c5efe1893

But Chae Beomjoon didn’t want to leave Haeyoon with bad memories. Even in this moment of being abandoned, he wanted to respect Haeyoon’s choice to say nothing. That’s the kind of man Chae Beomjoon was.a0357495f5c04e4c

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But still…af7a0f1eeca3719f

“If, if you ever decide to listen to me…”d2f3e5d8b1757f8e

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He could beg 71dbed4b13 once more. With a trembling voice, 75e8bcbcc5 Chae Beomjoon pleaded for e3daa3cc64 another chance. Seo Haeyoon stopped in f24b695bb5 his tracks.1a2b4829f4cc2760

“…That won’t happen.”e8de6b4bfff8dc40

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“But, if your heart changes… I’ll wait.”9f9f826fe4350424

At that moment, da8a19e936 the sound of df34f201ec footsteps quickened. Looking up, he saw cdeb27e4ea Seo Haeyoon approaching, his bf0651d447 face looking like he a7343c4d41 was about to cry, 06880e126f his eyes red with 46eaa4e814 resentment.cbfd96031e8ef584

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“So, why did you lie? Why! Why did you deceive me?!”5f5e8a0ddd321769

That was Haeyoon revealing a side of himself he had never shown before. Even on the day of the concert, though he had criticized Beomjoon, he hadn’t resented him like this.4df2ce1377101143

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Haeyoon’s hardened heart was starting to crack. Things Haeyoon had never shown were beginning to spill out.cfd0bd5856cebc7b

“Why did you do that, knowing you would act like this! What, do you think I’ll forgive you for this?”a89468194a638734

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His shouting voice was d9bb320895 wet. Seeing Haeyoon with b91b30ca4a his heart bleeding, 288e7e2a5d Chae Beomjoon felt 324fbee8e8 like he could d7366beb66 cry too. All he wanted b1c7cddba7 was to throw c8379b48b9 away the hard-earned a45f1d8436 opportunity and just b61c167db5 hug and comfort 826d892d6b Seo Haeyoon.9063cdeddd697eaf

But he couldn’t let this chance slip away either. Haeyoon must already know how much he cared for him. Now, he needed to clear up the misunderstanding. Clenching his fists, Chae Beomjoon spoke.6a5072ef89145b83

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“…I admit I didn’t tell you I was the acting director on purpose. I won’t make excuses for that.”2c4f8179b421caba

“Is that something to be proud of?!”90837c839d09c7ad

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“But you only found out I was the one who got you into the orchestra after we decided to be partners. The day I, as the acting director, didn’t show up for our second meeting. That day, I saw you playing alone on stage… I thought if you knew I was the acting director, you’d put up walls. I liked how you treated me casually, so I couldn’t tell you. On Halloween, you even said it was over…”0c737f31599cb7f0

Haeyoon’s eyes narrowed as if to say, “Is that an excuse?” The distrust within them was evident. Beomjoon could feel that Haeyoon didn’t believe his words. But he had to make it clear.ba843c4b15bd36b0

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“The only time I interfered with your career was when I decided to let you in after the blind audition. After that, I’ve never meddled in any matter. In fact, the only thing I did myself was that; otherwise, I only signed off on proposals from the performance planning team.”6ffd42d822a16f0f

“…”66b47b8c8cf9d3f7

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“Getting into the quintet was something you achieved on your own. By your skill.”a30c074090585b11

“Don’t lie to me!”4037aaad786906ec

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Haeyoon shouted when he mentioned his skill. At the moment when he spoke of his abilities, Haeyoon’s shout, piercing like a sharp needle, made Chae Beomjoon’s brows furrow in shock.3521f4d9e5a3494c

Haeyoon, who had just hurled a scream like a shriek, was trembling, gasping for breath. His fists were clenched tight, his eyes glistening with tears, his lips tightly bitten…cd3afafbcc0e6d23

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Seo Haeyoon a74f25e73e was hurt 24d498c0c6 by his 826b726260 words.a795a7f43ef5f243

Why…? Before he could even process the question, Haeyoon spoke, his lips trembling.e2b3e9129f4a6dd9

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“Do you know why I can’t believe you? It’s because… because that performance was a mess. The recording I sent to the orchestra was so embarrassingly self-indulgent that it was shameful to show to others! It was such a poor performance that I couldn’t get into any orchestra!!”728e145b0d581b45

“I never felt that…”837eced7af3606c5

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“Don’t make me laugh!”5b926ca92be05098

It sounded like he was crying. Each word Haeyoon uttered, to Chae Beomjoon’s ears, was like the sound of someone wounded and moaning.1e62456733b9f1bc

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His large eyes were filled with sorrow. The grief Haeyoon was showing for the first time in front of him was so vivid that it couldn’t be ignored.f8185a40ca3dd1dc

Suddenly, the night drenched in Siciliano came to mind. That day, Chae Beomjoon thought the sadness he felt was just from the melody Haeyoon created. But it wasn’t. The sorrow that made Chae Beomjoon sob without crying was the sadness from within Seo Haeyoon, which he expressed through his bow…1e8fabb787cc26f4

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“Haeyoon…”9781d40a867c1876

Now everything made sense.0e6d8808a6d3606c

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Why he contacted him every day he went to practice with the orchestra, why he was so happy with compliments on his performance, why he was so angry and disappointed at the possibility that the quintet wasn’t his own achievement.44be68f8c25e7de9

His words about being anxious, about not being a great musician… Chae Beomjoon thought it was just humility. But it wasn’t.ef96ea7fdf0dd0da

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“Do you really think you’re a talentless musician?”d4a69be683c85744

Seo Haeyoon didn’t know his own worth.6f617a1f5a15c608

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“Then what? No?”baa499d9d67c21ba

Unable to hold back the swelling sadness, tears fell from the corners of Haeyoon’s eyes. A damp, enveloping humidity seemed to cover Chae Beomjoon.f613b178f827c4c4

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The shadow of despair lurking at Haeyoon’s feet suddenly grew, pressing down on Chae Beomjoon. The weight of despair carried by someone who shouldn’t feel it was unimaginably heavy. It was suffocating.da79f383caa2c639

“I’ve never won a competition… I’ve been moved from one orchestra to another because I couldn’t adapt properly. And no one calls me a soloist…! If that’s not being talentless, then what is it? Do you think I’m stupid? Do you think I wouldn’t see through your attempt to lie and move on?”651135cb15149006

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