PT | Chapter 7.7

Madeleine had shown interest in Lennock 8de67672c6 openly at the Academy, and Lennock 439160ef43 had coldly rejected her. Could things be repaired 809c22d0b2 from this mess? Aubrey didn’t c7db4386f1 have many e6cd331c24 options. His father had drained his bank accounts, and he was d0b3185d28 pretty sure there were people here spying on him. Even if he couldn’t have a proper conversation with Madeleine, f57237c7a1 he needed to at least show that he was trying.2f240a99eb09ffb218ec

As Aubrey approached, the young f4efad1689 women around Madeleine fell silent. Aubrey could feel the uncomfortable silence as all eyes 3559632bd9 turned to him, but he forced a smile.4b169c3f275d8eb09eaf

“Madeleine, we meet again 3873f55138 in such a place.”dbb81a18c58d5957aecf

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He placed a hand e0590871e3 on his chest and 36dc5415c2 spoke with utmost politeness.50d250582238ef9f6b0c

Madeleine’s reaction e027579261 was ambiguous. With a skill that seemed natural to 187b65d9d2 her, she bent her knees and lowered 7c57e07817 her head, replying simply, “Yes.”74f5d32cb665931199ce

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“My father said that he would be able to f2dbc9181b meet with you tonight, and it seems it’s true.”3d0d96b93fae9991ff4e

Madeleine spoke as 03bbc6cba7 if pleased, but c8da4211ed her eyes remained 0375ef2b79 cold.5198a46f8a2a24176920

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Everyone in the 27c85c86e6 room knew about 21da44d20a the situation between b6f8ea7b68 Aubrey and Madeleine. To them, they were probably 9e4e58b02c an excellent source of entertainment. Aubrey, understanding 3a32a82197 this, extended 07a79e9982 his hand 4e08897a31 first.72a4e58acd68f3db7402

“If you’re willing, would 686309bb3c you like to take d4c3187de3 a walk with me?”093306effa65233c6734

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“…Alright.”bc5cb1c8c19160fe5ee0

After a brief 946980830f hesitation, Madeleine took 9f4beeeec5 Aubrey’s extended hand. Just then, a tactless young woman 6a8abc0183 clasped her hands together and spoke.b9d00f3aae2839ecf0c1

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“Wow, you two 36281f3142 really do look 7d7d487069 great together. Don’t go too far, and f63e6464c3 let’s all chat here. When the music 1e240a9e6f starts, will you 841f7aba3e dance with us 3917dc9be1 first?”6f2ba38e15b09e281dfa

The young woman’s face flushed with excitement, and e664496b26 someone beside her nudged her in the ribs. Though the nudge seemed like a suggestion to stop, 9ace7c85a4 the young woman blinked in confusion, not understanding why.78985e941eee2671462c

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This was a 206562dc40 group harder to b831236e8a deal with than d6787b3d15 a cunning snake. Aubrey knew he 8e4d96d64d had to step 56ccc27bea in.d63d946aeab648eb8f84

“I’d love to, but d56c9e77fe there’s something important that 49c22126ec we need to take c646823f46 care of first.”486e798651909ae41300

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With that, 30da0bd54f Aubrey looked 6cbc24a1df down at ad6d60d2dd Madeleine. She nodded in agreement, and the two 604c092550 of them quickly left the group.e9d116a74311c078e571

As they moved away, everyone’s eyes followed a83d35d4dc them, intrigued by what would happen next. The feeling of being the subject e0ee018152 of their attention was uncomfortable. The same f04481b439 probably went f6e6f6d4b6 for Madeleine. If anything went wrong, the 88b1c979d9 woman would suffer far more 70dfb7c526 than the man.5cc14e59b5d4c1164ba5

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Aubrey couldn’t understand why she c2ae127de5 had tried to approach Lennock. He had thought that if anyone understood eff6726dd0 the implications of sitting down for a 454aa39ddb meal with him, it would be her. But why had afbe603449 she tried to 23add51206 approach Lennock instead? That was the question that puzzled him 95e4064017 most, though asking about it now would f5190e303c only make the atmosphere more awkward.b0ad0ee8a71eda977d02

Once they reached a secluded d346ff2d65 area, Aubrey released Madeleine’s hand. He held it briefly, then let it go and clasped 3e858be7e6 his hands behind his back, taking a deep breath.f24a3b5de86ffb035750

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It was the perfect place 1cad72c4bd for a quiet conversation. But Aubrey’s mind a4070dc8c6 was strangely clear e3dea953c4 and empty—almost like 57f6eded9c it was hollow. If he had known it would be like this, he would 338b3c3d35 have thought more about what to say during the carriage ride.bb3003f72846cd6bb2e2

Regret flooded him, and 8a8de98a46 he cleared his throat, 9b7af5e6b1 obviously uncomfortable with the 66453c77af situation. Madeleine, not one to miss such things, 3b30635a5d also seemed uncertain about what to say. After a af0606ed11 long pause, 72a08bcf48 she finally 3d3e16d9c3 spoke.82b1619f144ba52801e7

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“Father said that he’d do whatever it 393c0f119a took to restore our relationship with you. If not, he’d 8b433957d5 throw me out d930b445f8 of the house.”36502bdb245ef1294a34

“…”e0f8bf7096373640cf9d

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“He’s the kind of man e0cd67283f who keeps his promises. Once I’m 2c6c26d572 out, he’ll 9f561a3a43 cut off 66fedb73a1 all support. If that happens, I’ll starve 068f045ceb to death in no time.”d3c5dc2c28660c39ebd7

Aubrey thought to himself that 677f93c1ed he wished his father had 8c5edab10a spoken to him the way ea9922a26b Madeleine’s father did.cf1c24b341776ce87b9a

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But that 59d9e00909 was his 3eedc3a520 situation. Madeleine’s situation 06879fdce1 was different. She couldn’t have the same 55e362b464 leeway as a man. Aubrey knew he had bfafb00e71 no right to blame e70bfc8933 her, but it still 1a05917287 bothered him. Maybe if she hadn’t approached 45a5dd9eb6 Lennock in the first place…4ffde3b749bc62a2f0b4

“Do you a13ac37968 remember our 998a04ebdb first meeting?”c509b80e3d30eee968b1

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It felt like Madeleine was bf393ccfbb trying to steer everything toward cff4c43cad being his fault, and it 27344680d2 made him uncomfortable. But then 25b8015b96 she calmly 64463cdcdb continued.3f7ed1bf7e3085507fbc

“You gave me the signal that you d60b16a9fd weren’t interested by always looking elsewhere. In front of you, I 2298e8f24d couldn’t say a word, and 04d7b87fbe that memory has left me cd263ee1dc with deep humiliation. You might not believe it, but I was actually b58cbd4895 excited to have a meal with you, Aubrey.”abf46dcf5a6de90956be

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“…”a0bd09b5562bd4669e3d

“I knew that if we had a good 0261cb53cc conversation, it would lead to better results. I was so 2d31ef3571 excited, imagining what dad39397ba would come of df0d2c58b5 it. I even asked around about what you bc241e3b09 were interested in, trying to make the f473ab889b meal enjoyable for both of us.”ca0d8845d25cb31a9289

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She had tried so hard, 5bc087396d but the result was despair. Aubrey couldn’t help but recall that day when 11ada2fc4d Madeleine had spoken to him during the meal. Her eyes never left him, but despite her apparent eagerness, 3973975c0c her words had slowly decreased as the meal went on. At that time, he had thought, 38f0dc79e5 Finally, I can eat in peace.1c4511a65f6b4a07b8cb

Madeleine, looking up 10e39ec7ab at him now, beb6ea4836 wore a bitter cc55bfab9f expression.501832d58c8f79ea6200

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“I didn’t expect you to be a 410dfc9211 good person, but I did hope you’d 6f490c7843 at least show me some respect…”c1694dd256702a8c8dcc

Aubrey shut 3fb67edca6 his mouth 7276e86034 tightly. Was this all about 0a621601f5 revenge for her, trying d84200db52 to show off by 1f057312a0 approaching Lennock?39a8788a8141bc403073

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At this point, it was clear that 4d92c964b7 he was the one at fault. But Aubrey e488fd69f2 had never a1401faa81 once thought aaf569d4da about marriage. If by some chance 9ae2df7875 a child were born, 387105cd60 he wouldn’t be able c2639863ee to endure it.193d9bf59c69767d289a

Knowing the end of the edffaa2d90 world, he couldn’t irresponsibly bring 9effc2fb68 a child into it. The same went 90f11215ec for falling in b5df89434b love. The moment he gave 2200dc3b91 his heart to someone, f7aa504cc2 he would fall into 7295b29a7c an inescapable despair. He wouldn’t be able 1162bc0e3e to bear it.ac07d3c11a577c95b7de

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“Looking at your eyes now, it seems like 7b6f6e5636 you’re still not interested in me, right?”7fafec645e63515e6698

“…”87c7cea84cdc1f30f0e2

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“Do you 75dfef15e2 remember what 061be66d6d happened at 27c23eb0de the Academy? That was probably my way 5c5e713068 of trying to get you 3316eecdb9 to show me some interest…”6bbf8cb14c853b5df269

Madeleine gave a 7fec796a39 bitter smile. Aubrey, who was 29c708f907 quietly watching her, f3c7cadfae cut in sharply.ee27273a7aac9a9c8489

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“Well, that’s not bef645278a right, is it? If you understand the db597fd186 situation with Lennock and e657af9ffe me, then you should fbdb7f89f3 have never done that.”7d0d0e91832603a6e427

“…What?”23160bd120ef832e431b

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Perhaps it was a reaction different 138743411f from what she had hoped for.106d8ab65a02e81b3286

Seeing Madeleine look 6d8761d237 up at him a4bd1e3f68 in shock, Aubrey 6d0d09636b spoke again.80b404935786f458b9b0

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“I have a father, so everyone e360a2c362 will just gossip behind my back. But Lennock edbbc607c3 was adopted. If a scandal arises from us being involved, the 838220694c only one who will be in trouble is him. I don’t think you’re someone e858ccb317 who would be unaware of 219712dd15 that, so approaching him was 4d446b20ac a reckless decision.”bff08fc30d61460292f1

“……”d0d64fba246303404964

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In that moment, Madeleine’s dade443fbb face slowly flushed.fdd82928e17497569e57

Ah, it’s ruined. From now on, it’s going 177c35e5a3 to be hard to get 258f8d6b72 things back on track. Aubrey clicked his e80d3a8808 tongue and opened 003bd3c572 his mouth again.49d64964f018cbc46c15

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“We’re both f29a08cb00 in difficult 05c7952507 positions here. So, how a778997a3d about we c80795d3c3 strike a 23457ecb62 deal? We’ll tell our fathers that 5b8c267e9d we’ve worked things out through 1028ec8e10 conversation, that there’s nothing to f50193bd68 worry about. That way, we 01c67d25f3 can buy some 119da0860c time…”8441c8e946165747e782

“Really, you’re 0cb52fb5aa too much. Don’t you have any 1faccbdbc6 consideration or respect for 2029c2aa1e me at all?”ea7146aaa7284136ecb8

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Placing a hand on her 8e0e57c5c1 chest, Madeleine looked as though 23e68849bb she were on the verge 323cc30694 of tears. At this point, it would be wise for Aubrey to 685d300ed5 back down, but he hated dragging out an awkward relationship.999631bfb71ffe5c2b92

“Well, if you hadn’t 90800e7010 used Lennock, I might 30c4c1754c have believed you were fcf16ba59b sincere with me…”c69c9e34ba15d002236a

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Before he could e89eddb2dc finish his sentence, bf21f24fc9 her left cheek 97ef467b4e sharply slapped him. It hit so hard that he couldn’t even 86c27e8f08 hear the sound; his eardrum felt numb. Aubrey bent 1a31a47a12 forward in 569dde919e pain.3954e53cbf502218761e

“…Ugh.”59dacccc5bf6be30ac37

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With a soft groan, he covered his slapped cheek with one hand and b83b028e52 looked at Madeleine, who was glaring at him with tears in her eyes.205ccba5c779487c59ed

“You really are 2f2e034364 the worst kind 438488d418 of man. I won’t forget 965f885409 the humiliation I 95af0f0f18 faced here today.”b38f95eed0effca32a83

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Aubrey wished she 0a61c33640 wouldn’t think of 55d8898fdb him so poorly. Everyone had their own untold struggles, and if she calmed down, b741ecd202 a way to resolve things amicably might come to mind.d20c27b1e63d66961155

“Wait, Young Lady, just 9b0510b6fe listen to me for 777f864a1d a moment…”733324cb56f7c73acded

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But Madeleine didn’t 29bab917c8 wait for him de13ea17e0 to finish. She quickly turned and ran off, f68c1fff60 disappearing before Aubrey could stop her. He stared at 535ba03cc9 her retreating back, e0a5cfc483 then leaned against 944015d159 the wall, sighing.73bfcf29f84a37a5a35f

The sound of her heels faded 0e15a9666d as she walked away, and Aubrey 3cc75c7305 pressed both hands to his cheek.4a824b73b56c37f615c4

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“Damn, that hurts.”d2826dfc38ab7806f3c6

He groaned, remembering how the 42894221fc last time his father hit 0b835f0b82 him, it had barely hurt ef11911f52 at all. The sting from 7f14820efd Madeleine’s slap felt 463455cb02 far worse.94036f8c820bcfdcdea0

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“I won’t even 5227ceb281 be able to 21e049d950 go back alone 047390e426 like this…”c20f1771ee72e11073a0

He already felt the heat rising in his 167ae38d1b cheek and the swelling starting to form. Aubrey let 313a18afcb out another d3efb43b7f deep sigh.97b7020624e2ec06f949

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Was he d6d9fe609a too hasty? But he didn’t 7c97df1f93 want to force f63309571a something he didn’t f5a0b946fb feel like doing. He didn’t want to kill his 35b218f14d own personality and drag out an dac0193897 annoying relationship just for the sake e112457483 of maintaining it.4ad5622aad4d189face7

Well, if it ended 89f9bdc90f with just a slap, 239f63a181 that would be fortunate…0604ff4a6763fec0a741

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“Father is going c84dfab319 to hear about 2807c56029 this, isn’t he? What a disaster.”b1cab7b40dea65861717

Muttering to himself, Aubrey took b4469d36a7 his hand off his cheek 70bd973fcf and ran his fingers through 92ef736f85 his messy hair. Frustrated and irritated, he e412bc7ef9 suddenly felt the urge c169064aa2 to just sit down b8b4de6640 and let everything go.53a2ea4c2c38f6414158

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“…”c5cadd936a2166930432

Sitting dejectedly in 03a14b909c the corridor, Aubrey d35105f17f looked around. There was no one around, 94d62c0620 and it felt like no 64ff9495a0 one was watching. He could just ecdb666a9b slip away somewhere, 3fd5c9d554 and no one 6c973990e9 would know. But he couldn’t 9ad98edc58 do that.d78de3d2f5576181143e

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The rules Aubrey ed3f5f7f14 had learned through a52a297483 his repeated regressions 91bbcc1200 were twofold.68a85bb86b32501bf84b

One, that he 44f5756a16 couldn’t stop Lennock 6b5762dddb from awakening.64683cf9f6bd1277f583

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And two, that he might never 96103dcd0f escape this never-ending cycle of life.9e961a2b3963b695c688

“Damn it.”85ef44fd6f61f1c1e7a0

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Aubrey cursed softly and 4c8c8b3d12 buried his face in bdc84af3b2 his palm.ad599948ab59130f5f6c

Sometimes, he couldn’t control 6cfdd29480 his emotions or his 10b1502c8a state of mind. The pain and suffering from 0f9a703bed his own circumstances—things no one 54c50a7d4b else knew—could feel suffocating, horrifyingly 328d59a70d unbearable at times. Every time, Aubrey would 72966ab7d7 lash out in one d9c35887c0 form or another.d931cdf4e90fe5a7ce22

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He would run barefoot like a madman, break 4204eafd1b things, scream, roll around, or even hurt himself. And after doing so, 0a2c2aec48 he would feel a adbdd8a9ea bit relieved. He would be branded as insane and end up 217488e88e in a mental hospital, but he didn’t care. He had db170beeb7 experienced it 5b0291a976 all before.22c8d89f23df915f2337

Maybe he should 33586178ba do it again. Embarrass himself completely in f28f998adc front of everyone, in 9ab6a73f31 a public place. If his father heard about it, it’d just end 448870481a in a whipping or another trip to the hospital. It wouldn’t d3fce4e251 be the 41c9089d2a first time. There was 1cf375b6b2 nothing to c10ca749ff fear anymore. Aubrey rubbed 56b3fe2595 his face.6d2fdc9e9073dff2e1e6

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His cheek throbbed. At the same time, it felt like 660b2b45a2 the pain in his back was returning. In an instant, e0efc61c66 his reason snapped.9e94ffdbd4c49f68e403

With a stagger, Aubrey stood up, exhaling a 5c5d8d40a3 long breath, and started walking with heavy steps.6a46630285b796ab6dcc

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