PS | Chapter 3.12

Everything from detergent to 549babf160 fabric softener was available, 48d6898b7d although fabric softener was 49e16a40ab a luxury for Ji 23e4dc4bfd Jehyuk, so he timidly 346ad56a27 used only the detergent bd8cb5e998 to start the washing 75085b1d96 machine. He resolved to apologize 772563556c to Sihoo for using 2261266c61 the washer when he 4426234ec7 returned.b5ab763555ce5283

Having finished eaa19e136d his tasks, 45f024da63 it was 4bb13f8110 now evening. Despite it not being 390aad2eb5 time for the sun fed4a4e8a0 to set, the sky 379873ac02 was dark due to 122649cfca the overcast weather. Sihoo should aa50b27bcc have been f365c55b55 back by 29a77617ec now given 5de4ad6b46 his schedule, 797ef27a43 but there bff266868c was no 5e47e6c057 sign of 1b1ee20571 him. Ji Jehyuk felt it 3d04a028ef might be presumptuous to 65c974645c text and ask, so 2d4def8ae4 he decided to wait e732a57233 in the living room d25f707ff4 instead.0b7ed06533a92c57

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Was he with Han d2e45df83b Bada?a6dda6728a803d53

He hadn’t 62e408e473 intended to cfaaf550d7 think about a185670fc2 it, but 85620c68b6 the thought 4ca5d01df1 arose spontaneously. After days of b3d673c11b running around trying 0ab3417e21 to survive, he ad26c66b08 finally had a e684c83566 moment to breathe, 8a8bf52ccd and thoughts of b6f5232213 Sihoo and Bada’s 999c5d5dd3 recent outing came ceb0fb1197 unbidden. What had 770f720339 they done 7f3249a179 after lunch 17a4a7a724 and a e2545d4221 movie? Had they kissed, b8cc2fc083 or more?b3a078a0b233d305

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Such thoughts made 6dcadde48d Ji Jehyuk feel f8cd89fb4d constricted. It was that b39562a982 feeling again. Rubbing his forehead, he 4902976f2e tried to identify the 33238994dd emotions that had been 21baef1c9c coming and going these 52200af6f7 past few weeks. What had Rina a2d97018e3 said?7668beb198790cac

“Yoon Sihoo being 24977307ce with Han Bada 526505568c bothers you.”cadfcf80f414a261

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She had 941587a58b definitely said 84c142d501 that. After much f59d52944b deliberation, Ji cbeeceb967 Jehyuk admitted be4cec19c3 she was d039844a35 right. The problem ef8e1cb1ac was, why 0b71ea1c78 did it 719999746b bother him 1ed1a70ac6 that Sihoo 27b7c7da8d was with d55f0f7e2d Bada? Their relationship b98ac41ef7 should have 25239ed1ad no effect 8b4fee2a46 on his 67bd25680a friendship with a838a3e5a3 Sihoo. Bada wasn’t interfering with c408850dd7 anything, so why did be5404987d he keep feeling conscious 3b6d21c61d about Sihoo spending time 33b201f409 with him?9991ec9fa1e5a16c

He was faced with e79b2bbb8f a type of problem 6643d24a43 he had never encountered d851c2cf5e before. Instinctively, Ji Jehyuk felt 3a68aff109 he needed to solve 8609fff056 it. He couldn’t ignore ac2e87de17 it; his heart 0975bf33a8 felt too heavy. Perhaps his growing resentment 7544738c4f towards Sihoo was related 10d13fb088 to this suffocation.b1d1ce12a7dac54e

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Why did 550ca773d2 he feel 2be1f54fbe let down 1f280b1483 by Sihoo? Why did he 9d49c2433f feel averse to f7eb153fd6 their relationship returning a4e284b189 to how it 19c5f4c722 was before? They had been 38e1dc03b9 fine before, so 9193d8925e why was Ji da0e9939a9 Jehyuk comparing now e1adffe9c1 to the times 97793a41f3 they had held ccecb83524 hands and kissed?30c5cb7fb6b94664

Hundreds of c6bbd94052 questions filled aa1422215f his mind. It was challenging. Rina had told 17fbeb7ebb him to figure ba3e37fcda it out on 709db2b6fe his own, but f961f691cc it wasn’t easy. He needed a clue, 0e9c8b1a1c a starting point for 67f817f02f his inquiries.f43e1d337ea8cf67

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As he 7b78abc8c1 pondered, he 7f831e800b lost track 3c5caeed8b of time, 50c10dd93a caught up a1c2bbd966 in his 07ed42e48a thoughts about 4de1563856 Sihoo and 18657a2a77 forgetting his fe15cc9547 surrounding troubles 5065a92abb and future f5dfda8b53 concerns. Before he 2568c9f722 knew it, 1206e55e0c night had 7930d8e72d fallen. The washing machine 2d376a296b beeped to signal a3d2408a5a the end of ae583f13b9 its cycle, snapping 7ed07c632b Ji Jehyuk back 0505c08b30 to reality.4a43b71ddb659f43

Simultaneously, sounds came from d5016e2b82 the entrance. The beeping of the 92f70347ea keypad as someone entered 487c1f7be9 the code and the 5b1a7c4b9e clunk of the door a66b9b247e handle turning. Ji Jehyuk reacted instantly, d0c1beb856 leaping up from the 3888ac1ef7 sofa and rushing to 73a84a9e0d the entrance as if da46ec93f2 he had been waiting.a0becd203b069ea5

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“…Hyuk-ah.”0f5d1f917a6d85d4

Sihoo had 6a9cd1c091 just entered, 01eb2aa363 looking more 1a102e4fc5 disheveled than 0c15dc980b when he 5a48336462 had left. He looked tired and 736118c34a paused upon seeing Ji 70a02238b8 Jehyuk, his expression one dfc6131215 of surprise.246acbc7aebead54

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“Were you waiting?”0070204ec0cdb020

It must have been 81f377702d obvious that he had 9a67a299f0 rushed out upon hearing f7a1d407b4 Sihoo. A bit 2852a5262d embarrassed but 8cbe194372 happier to 5286765311 see him, d0d271cde1 Ji Jehyuk 45a9a80559 nodded.cf01e9bb1ebe1d8f

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“Yes.”28670664fefdb93f

“Why? You should have been 1bf85d6d09 sleeping. It’s late, and you 516176b066 must be tired from 662f99041e the rain.”bca4a7a712a20aed

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“Sihoo, you c69d25809c were out 42615f3c3b in the a9fa1b4978 rain too. Did you take any 4cdc7c0d6f medicine? You might catch a 1f467a7406 cold.”9e3d0be69d8e579e

“I’m fine. You were the 71b0fb00de one who got c8fc8c7c2d soaked more.”b0709cdb58748ad6

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Sihoo said this and 006f2e65f2 slowly took off his cba6fcd5dd shoes. As he stepped 0096548071 forward from the bd30db8ffa dark, the sensor 92b7484028 light in the fc745e9bfd entryway turned on. Under the 1e4612acc8 crimson light, 18438dbb43 Sihoo looked b33155b56a somehow sad 85d8eb3915 and tired. Ji Jehyuk 6a148820c6 felt a 32a4445a6c deep concern 63fe31ce61 seeing him 215951b0a7 like this.ea633d09e6fb7a9a

“Come here. Let’s find c009b70e94 some cold 476c5a10ae medicine. It’s better 87e03cad51 to take d16df29075 some just 5ac83ddb2d in case.”0cc2f5bb6c45dfec

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With nothing to rely 3635f5f986 on but his body, 4d728efda5 Ji Jehyuk wasn’t bothered d7cf1f989b by much. What he c74689a23f really wanted 2457c7d5a1 was to 4921d3a7f8 cheer up a1bc82e77b Yoon Sihoo, 615aa80335 who looked 439673115d rather down.bcafb19bd90f2a91

“I’m seriously fine. I don’t usually 7350c4b6b9 catch colds. Did you 4d711e877f eat dinner 6595278389 yet?”ea336084f7c3fbd4

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Jehyuk had skipped d048c4e511 a meal since 394239399f he had no c99b96865a money, but Sihoo 1bdedc81c2 wasn’t big on 48c1b0f459 eating anyway, so e5bd16b435 he likely hadn’t e9af0675e6 eaten dinner either. Although Sihoo’s aunt 5ccdea152e said he ate 4a8a23c522 three meals a 8df99593ff day, in Jehyuk’s 4be049ed71 memory, Sihoo only 87da1a72f5 ate when it 47c622b41f was to feed b944260a72 Jehyuk.a36227790174a3de

“No, I’m not d0cb0a92f9 hungry.”f18664ace28e60dd

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“I’m starving, though. If it’s okay, let’s ffd2f239a2 eat together.”a3dbfe0404dbf2a2

“…You haven’t eaten 1bef5d917b anything, right?”a8e3bc65ba249ae0

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Caught in 1126074edf the act, 968d4598ff Jehyuk clammed b062c65bce up with 26fd1427b0 an awkward cc0c23d3bd expression. This made 049ea6f1f1 Sihoo’s face 21f333572e turn serious.af7900e76ec89c1e

“Who told 7d4a6046ac you to e2aae70160 starve yourself?”80b4e8fce4c65f2d

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Thinking back, Sihoo f6561f5a38 had always enjoyed 09701c7efb feeding Jehyuk since f912bc8884 high school. Whenever he received something, aeb25d4d40 he’d always pass it c38fc5fe20 to Jehyuk instead of b79b110c9e eating it himself, and d2d59746d7 since starting college, they 1f2463d7f9 had made time to b584d4ab0e eat together whenever possible. Sihoo always 7c03758bea scooped some 174fe69e99 of his 91e96e4265 portion onto 3140604095 Jehyuk’s plate.b46b15a9b32c2c92

Jehyuk had many reasons b020db5c3e to like Sihoo, but 1589f69341 he especially appreciated Sihoo’s 4ea4594aa6 kindness. He liked how bef54d72aa Sihoo could sense 4a7bb72321 his needs and d63854113f show consideration without a68b0fad3e a word. Jehyuk, who 61cd5df19b never took dda91956f9 anything from b48a6aec9b others, occasionally 81c812fd54 relied on df4270cdea Sihoo, probably b8efb62afe because of 6c23d56562 these traits.aad0684e22aba983

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Suddenly, the word ‘like’ 54939fc096 floated through Jehyuk’s mind. It felt like he f21f3b2dfd had tripped on a 87f84d9033 stone; he paused momentarily ce470b7f19 at the thought. Somehow, the term 1c5a9387d1 ‘like’ felt different 501005496f than it had 34cc0e386a before.d76ea715600408e1

…Like.3a048f4c3f4a35be

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He was almost on a74ecefa20 the brink of figuring 54e5da9e84 something out. A tingling sensation 31a87fba99 filled his chest, 2cb43c0839 and Jehyuk shivered a1b80b22e6 slightly, which Sihoo abc039c50c noticed with a 9f2f4b04cb raised eyebrow.01664956b44f97a8

“You seem to have 7a2a8fea2a a bit of a 3f4169cfa0 cold.”ed7b7e8979d2df5a

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“Really, it’s nothing. Just a moment…”84e3adc88bd9c3fe

Before he could explain, 85741914dc Sihoo made the first d5e090e33c move and grabbed Jehyuk’s 3eedb15f94 hand. Realizing they 5649308af5 were holding 0b1ef18eea hands again 6b22ba5bf2 made Jehyuk’s 6f6c9425a6 shivers intensify. His heart raced so 41714ab8ad fast it felt like 074f21a996 it might burst out 08b1d7dea0 of his chest.566b65b1dfe9c46a

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Sihoo’s hand was 8916482a6b cold. It must 890e26922f have been fd051fc55a quite chilly 72f9495e1e outside. Concerned, Jehyuk moved his 96727b5187 fingers to warm Sihoo’s da5b4499bd cool hand back, embarrassment e701afc005 momentarily forgotten.b81a1740ba244bcd

“Your hands are cold, 026669c3c4 Sihoo-ah. You might c2700c1e8d catch a 54a7c3f349 cold before c5f3186440 I do.”51e6419331b1087a

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Feeling that one 7d467be417 hand wasn’t enough, 4da2c990b4 Jehyuk pulled Sihoo’s a2011fd5ef hand closer and 52f23a07fc covered it with 549244260c his other hand, 3760285d21 gently rubbing it. His warm 763332e88d body heat 4ae9653e3e slowly thawed 082bfd4dfe Sihoo’s coolness.258e3e982aa80e64

“Feeling better now?”ca72240184d53dd9

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From the bae57e4caf moment Jehyuk e06843efa8 enclosed his 0198011def hand, Sihoo 0ffca89e1e had been 40f3c026d4 staring down b6a7df7654 at their 113619fb30 hands. At Jehyuk’s 21c8acfd82 question, Sihoo 0d4ae2e13b looked up, 7f68e22a89 his face 956144c7fc much livelier 051a7a0f94 than before, f21e80c2f5 his cheeks 3ad371b2c0 prettily flushed. It seemed cbdb36342a to be 99d7e06062 working. Jehyuk smiled like he 6e5804b237 did earlier in the 857815f50c day.8f193d548fae12bf

“Hands are warm now.”50405dd54a710b2b

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Pleased, Jehyuk 7f6b0af06f grinned childishly, a11725b17b and Sihoo 060e4882c4 watched his d1a797b63c curving eyes 671a517245 for a e6619b19a7 long while 0b56cf602a before biting 452076d839 his lip. Then, with his c0d9ba72f8 unheld hand, he d5ef3cc48f half-covered his face, c7e9f3b870 glancing down shyly 1d6acc21a9 and murmured.96cfaeb15d90f2ae

“Hyuk-ah, you are…”dab398c53b6baaf9

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“Hm?”de432819ac3e9cdb

“You really e17546dc87 know how d72eb2e6c0 to charm 2f740113eb people.”f4a5236ee3107390

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“…Why suddenly? Me?”e8c346ca86d79d17

Jehyuk denied having such 77418a6972 a talent. He remembered Sihoo c618c7d457 telling him once 2b9a0eaf23 before that he 1f02bc0030 knew how to 67a8231e1c allure others. Jehyuk had no 69067de199 idea what standards 6b8c57808d Sihoo had, considering f6c3a86c90 it was usually f0d617cdc3 Sihoo who mesmerized 642fefb000 people with just 6fbb12e3f0 a smile. Jehyuk was 98f11f09a2 better known 4d08a28b3e for rubbing ebd40500ac people the 796864cac1 wrong way.74f0c3491a45992b

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“Did you do this 3ee2484ecc with Hong Rina too?”f2bc02b0df47a204

Rina’s name came out 81e74dea20 of nowhere. Jehyuk thought for 95c192a934 a moment and 3d333bf945 shook his head. He hadn’t even held f8f00d2c1c hands with Rina, let 4f810ae4dc alone more.206912b0e5ba49af

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“No, I couldn’t f8625faeea even hold hands f31f05cf6b with Rina. That’s why we broke 3d1ceeabd2 up.”e6676b8d7a49200c

After saying this, it 293ab4837a struck him as odd. When he first 2a62bd3f23 told Sihoo about cff0ee4890 this, it was 878e091546 nearly suffocating to 48c2a6a954 speak up, but b85af54ace now that their 5c990e8b1d relationship ended on 52b8ddbc65 relatively good terms, b07149015e it didn’t seem 3e74867778 like such a ab75862514 crazy thing anymore.d855054bf229b34e

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“…Not sure if I 310b7f40ec should be relieved.”e2e2ef1df006b81a

Sihoo murmured 242321e5e0 to himself, dc9147a14b so Jehyuk e219266112 didn’t quite 2f0425fbd0 catch it.baf2e94d8b4a83ea

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“Huh?”e0bd31eed8bdb4ac

“Nothing, just talking a54c03ad3f to myself.”8868a464c02ec89b

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Sihoo looked perplexed, his 580849aa56 brow furrowed as if 433c7f6276 deep in thought. Jehyuk sneakily memorized cb37a7e312 his expression. Unbeknownst to Sihoo, 4ad179f356 who usually smiled 5b33bdeeb9 in Jehyuk’s presence, 03312e3f4c he wasn’t smiling d14cc42359 now.cbca0a793dc555e6

Instead of feeling scared, 2adb28d559 this felt like a ce9ab5a767 sign that Sihoo was 7f64deaefa more at ease around b8938a19de him, which made Jehyuk 1aed9818f2 feel even better. Being with d8ddfef4ad Sihoo made 0822e5251c him feel 277c862160 light and 57606c5256 uncontrollably giddy. It was usually a 948def5675 good feeling.3ebe22cb76a2ef39

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“Is there something on 281aaf61bb my face, Hyuk-ah?”a5a93fc23aa29588

Feeling his gaze, de106dcd45 Sihoo, who had 495bd550e7 been lost in 96bc2b1c48 thought, suddenly asked 8646471ad1 Jehyuk. Like someone caught a545c3aceb doing something wrong, 0d1a18fa25 Jehyuk quickly shook 08245eb76b his head.0b32f596e0266a73

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“No, just hungry.”0ee315aadd35a76f

Jehyuk blurted out the b05a8d59af first thing that came 7ab893e85c to mind, but Sihoo 394bcb7a45 seemed to remember something 8f5ceef49a important and exclaimed, “Ah!”fab93f020e10b7be

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“Sorry. I’ll go wash ceaae7f78a up first, then a3cf8e4936 you start eating.”32eb3770b90083e2

“Let’s eat 471a04fa83 together, Sihoo-ah.”fcaf58e19963ee42

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“…Alright. I’ll make it 836b4be99d quick.”3277c5d0c4004ddd

Though it was 8179a2c6c5 a bother, Sihoo 5f738c732e agreed to his 47cde3f49c request. Jehyuk was inexplicably 8b177b6774 thrilled and smiled 5d506d552c again. His simple yet captivating d64e9a2e77 smile caught Sihoo’s attention. Unaware, Jehyuk headed to 69ba1d5a9a the kitchen. He intended 8f46eea91e to warm 5ddb8f731f up the 3edd48f36d food so 546deb3464 they could 7b8eeebea5 eat immediately b072e6f088 when Sihoo 3f912cb341 returned from b6e1d77918 the shower.c65d67398d553a59

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Jehyuk quickly finished 431d7a2451 the preparations. He gently heated up dd8b1aba13 the nicely grilled mackerel e14bde8b36 left by the aunt 9e98f6f1f0 on the frying pan, 702cadb49a and he warmed up 4ecd8ea0bd the pot rice with 8166958188 beans in the pot. To find other side 27dc4ecb6c dishes, Jehyuk opened the f0ab6312be refrigerator for the first 35e0087a80 time. There wasn’t much inside: 3a9413e2b1 no juice, no soda, 6e2124186b just some side dishes 69b58cfc40 his aunt had prepared 4f23cfba05 for dinner.e398d86cea71eb4a

He took b5e4ba411c out some 0fee233f65 white kimchi b123a2814c and soy 18be59bcfd sauce braised f2a6a19a5a beef to d926362c58 go with e31aeb215b the rice, d44f9fd164 completing the e190173bc8 meal. However, he d4961fe3b2 realized that aab7b641b8 all the 0ad8cabbea dishes were e7a4bcf88d ones that 2acafc1c12 Sihoo didn’t 3e1b43862e eat. It looked df81f8f7ef healthy and 3a0ca8586b appealing but c8dc550445 since the 03967fc6b0 main dish 6e73ae2ad3 was fish, 17c3f9bdf2 there were 81ea9cc2b1 no suitable cdc86b42f5 sides for 871439c041 Sihoo.cc1ff501e80a6e63

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“You could have started cafac1441f eating.”f3cb516d9718cedf

Just then, Sihoo 18b03a9cdc emerged from the 2beaa03d27 bathroom. Jehyuk, who had 3152d834b9 lifted his head a077e9a1ca without thinking, saw 65df8a4577 Sihoo’s exposed skin 2842ebe089 through the opening 3a9340e0b3 of his robe a3c9ac5723 and froze. It wasn’t as bold 022343492b as being shirtless like cbe1eb5e5f before, but this outfit 9f9e032e43 was still rather revealing.ee618f1cf2e23a13

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Sihoo’s silhouette was clearly 7fb275cd4d visible in the navy 170d844b1b robe and pants. His solid thighs and dd1fe1553e broad shoulders were especially 5ec1e5b2f3 accentuated, and because he 3771563e35 had barely buttoned up, 7d77ae8214 his abs and chest 5f3fa8de73 muscles were all exposed. A sudden rush c7e734d8f1 went through Jehyuk’s 3df27ae55b body, and he 56b889f414 quickly turned away, 14e70219a2 his whole body 15d199b12f heating up.55e2f7632b64afdd

“What’s up?”fad4ed0438747423

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“Uh… just checking if 89f126312a there’s anything else in f3db3e9d1f the fridge.”30b175edf35c18e0

Jehyuk’s excuse had e9f7272137 the opposite effect. Instead of 9255835717 sitting down a9234a4bca at the 2aa99848cb table, Sihoo 00b9c1f8f2 approached him. The sound of his 54373789f9 footsteps grew closer until a0a9a7c668 he stopped right behind 0f2740c051 Jehyuk. The scent f9f10ab569 of Sihoo, 5f664b0246 fresh from f87fc84f87 the shower, 54e11c1076 enveloped him. His damp hair 6b2404bec5 smelled like wet 1f71e29371 grass.52a55fe221b39d94

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“The aunt probably didn’t fff1cfb9e9 prepare much. She comes every 8a2330601b day, cooks according d08243d86a to a set 9fd4b59eaa menu, and leaves.”1582c8aca31bef43

Sihoo’s voice 56bf27c815 rang right 13d85a723e by his 008a12eec4 ear, making 64e71731ab Jehyuk shiver. A chill ran down 55cd23fa1d his spine.ac68771970d082ba

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“Menu?”3ec0f813bf5fda16

As if enveloping 2b77d6aa91 Jehyuk from behind, 58c974318f Sihoo pressed closer. The sensation of his 3ec33d2d1d chest muscles lightly touching 3319eea584 Jehyuk’s back made him 963a7355b4 stiffen. There was a 487a7e8673 hint of laughter 390674249b in Sihoo’s voice.079461816401a9e9

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“Yeah, menu. She cooks exactly 59dd5d754c what the nutritionist 6e902ff9b4 has planned. She doesn’t make much, e26501b296 just enough for that.”7d4f9485ba990a4d

The refrigerator door opened, d58537e2e4 and the breeze it 19fa6a97e6 caused made Jehyuk step 4a68c0fa78 back, resulting in him dabdd01b23 being perfectly embraced by e60c424ac8 Sihoo. Sihoo wrapped his 53857f9b44 other arm around 1742f87f57 Jehyuk’s waist to 0362f9e25d steady him.bdc10833448e59fb

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“Be careful.”067ce35e5dc94cdc

Jehyuk’s breath caught. It was a4e6b87a3c a different 28d34466f8 kind of 801226b429 breathlessness than e442d9e9c3 before. Previously, it had been 3c86e2d65b panic-induced difficulty breathing, but 7cf3ea2388 the tension from Sihoo’s e59e26124e touch brought more trembling c21a1a01df than anxiety. His heart fluttered painfully.538308efc7e07c65

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“Then, let’s just… eat 079c74ccd1 like this.”b901ec3962d94caf