MM Ch 3 part 1

PR by neji

「Once you’re done with class, can you text me back?」

I received this message after I had finished my tutoring session and was walking back home. I looked at my cell phone in front of the elevator and stopped walking. The caller ID said ‘Professor Lee SangBaek’. 

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I had saved his number on my phone out of courtesy, but I had never received any calls or messages from this number as of yet. There was nothing I had to do, so I found his sudden message to be very strange.

To sum it up, he had contacted me to let me know that he was in the area and was free to give me a ride back home. The tutoring academy had their own drivers that would drive students back home, so there was no need for him to volunteer to pick me up. Therefore, I found this very strange. I replied to his message and told him there was no need to do so. The Professor responded that he wanted to use this chance to talk to me about something.

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In the end, I got into Professor Lee’s black sedan that was waiting for me in front of the academy. I was nervous about what he was going to say, but the topic was surprisingly simple.

He asked if I found anything difficult in regards to my studies. What college did I want to apply to? What major did I want to choose? He continued to ask me about my studies and academic goals like a college counselor.

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“I think it would be nice if you attended my university. I could brag about how smart you are to my colleagues.”

Although he didn’t sound very satisfied, I didn’t hear any malice or ill will in his voice. I always found the father-son relationship between quiet, geeky Professor Lee and mysterious, cunning Lee Kyuwol to be very suspicious. I often wondered what Lee Kyuwol’s German mother was like.

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However, not all sons took after their fathers. Just like how I was nothing like my own mother.

“I believe Misook-ssi is lucky to have a daughter like you. Although, I feel that she’s not aware of it sometimes.”

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Professor Lee’s words took me by surprise as he brought the car to a gentle stop at a red light. Although the topic was quite unexpected, I couldn’t help but feel moved by the sentiment. I continued to look forward so that my true emotions would not be exposed, but he continued to talk in his usual calm, steady voice.

“I feel that is the case with most artistic people. Their emotions can be quite turbulent. Almost as if they’re children. Ah, I don’t mean it in a bad way, though. It’s just that… I just felt that even if they’re family, if their personality is very different from yours, it can be very difficult. That’s the thought that popped into my head when I saw you.”

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I didn’t know how to reply to that, so I remained silent.

“Although I might not be much help, if there is anything you feel uncomfortable bringing up to Misook-ssi, feel free to come to me at any time.”

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“Thank… you.”

I answered politely and slightly lowered my head. I felt that Professor Lee had a surprisingly kind and deep heart. He had a sensitivity that my mother lacked. That might be why the two of them clicked so well. They say that humans are drawn to people who have what they themselves lack.

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“I understand that there are many things that may bring you discomfort. Especially because my son and you are the same age.”

When the topic switched over to Lee Kyuwol, I felt my temple throb.

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Before the summer break, after that confrontation we had in the middle of the night, my expectation that our interactions would be a lot more comfortable from here on out was completely thrown out the window. The person who made me the most uncomfortable was Lee Kyuwol.

“…If that kid… ever makes you feel uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to tell me.”

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Professor Lee spoke carefully as he turned the steering wheel at the intersection. I wondered if he could see into my head and read my thoughts.

Now that it was off-season and he didn’t have any major competitions, Lee Kyuwol often stayed at the house as if he lived there. Although it sounds a bit funny, in the past, it wouldn’t have been an exaggeration to say that he basically lived at the athletes’ village. However, he now frequently returned home, and it bothered me a lot.

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“Nothing’s happened, right?”

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“Why? Do you want something to happen?”

“Let’s go out and eat.”

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“I don’t have time for that.”

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Whenever he suddenly popped up around me, and whenever he spoke to me as if it were normal to do so, I couldn’t help but think about him, and it bothered me.

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“He’s my son, but there are times when I don’t understand him at all.”

As time went on, Lee Kyuwol’s eyes lingered on me more and more. If I was asked to give reasons why I was unhappy with the way he stared at my face, I would be able to give more than ten.

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One of the biggest reasons was that I was the only one who noticed Lee Kyuwol’s transformation. Whenever he looked at me, he no longer had a smiling mask on his face.

“Then do you want to go out for a drink? In case you didn’t know, I’m a heavy drinker.”

“Have you lost your mind?”

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“Probably?”

“It’ll be quite a scene to see all the web portals plastered with headlines claiming the national representative, who happens to be a minor, is drinking.”

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“Is that your way of kindly worrying about me?”

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Because of the way he frequently teased me, I began to feel incredibly nasty.

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“Ever since he was young, that kid was a bit… how should I put it…”

I had already furiously searched terms like ‘Lee Kyuwol personality’ and ‘Lee Kyuwol past’ on the internet. Despite my efforts, I wasn’t able to find anything substantial. 

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All I found was just how special he was. There were multiple reports on how distinguished he was compared to other kids his age, and I cared to know none of it.

“He’s special.”

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Professor Lee finally came to a satisfactory word.

He wasn’t wrong. At the age of thirteen, Lee Kyuwol started swimming, relatively late for others his age. However, within two years, he dominated the athletic meets and became a national representative. It would be strange to call him normal.

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And ever since I was young, I would lose my nerve whenever I was around special people, so I wanted to avoid them.

Back in middle school, I had a friend who was in the same class as me and went to the same tutoring academy. She was extraordinarily tall and had big eyes that seemed to take up half of her face. She was very pretty. Whenever I walked with her, I found all the gazes coming our way to be too intimidating. Anyone could tell from one glance that when I was standing next to such a special person, my normalness looked even more pathetic.

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We went up a grade, and our classes changed. I began to ignore her calls, and ultimately, she grew disappointed and I succeeded in putting distance between us. I bet that even now, that girl still did not know why I had grown so awkward around her. Whether it was then or now, I had a severe complex when it came to these things.

“It’s still… awkward, but let’s all try harder and… get along.”

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Professor Lee hesitated before saying the words with much difficulty. However, I didn’t hold any animosity towards him. Actually, I felt more comfortable. Unlike my strange mother and his extraordinary son, Professor Lee seemed very normal and average.

Outside the car window, I saw that people were dressed differently now.

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It was now September. That meant that over six months had passed since my mother and Professor Lee had married in the spring. During this time, Professor Lee hadn’t said so much as a word to me. However, his cowardly attempt at approaching me now seemed to melt my frozen heart.

I felt that Professor Lee was the perfect partner for someone like my mother. I felt that her constant search to settle down had finally culminated in this man, and she had finally found security. Because of this, I couldn’t help but feel a bit grateful to this man.

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“Hm? Why are the two of you coming home together?”

My mother told us that she was filming until dawn, but it seemed that she had returned home early. She was in the middle of putting on a semi-translucent face mask, so I couldn’t see her expression. 

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However, I could tell that she did not like how Professor Lee and I walked in through the front door together. At times, her eyes sent a louder message than her words, and my ability to read someone’s mood was almost animalistic in nature.

“We met at the elevator.”

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I lowered my head and answered her before walking back to my room at a pace that wasn’t too fast or too slow.

After what happened that summer a few years ago, I knew how to pick up ways to avoid perturbing her mood. Having filmed dozens of dramas and movies, my mother knew how to turn every single daily event into a makjang.

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It was best to just nip things in the bud before her ridiculous theories took flight. Because the nineteen-year-old me was a lot more intelligent than my fifteen-year-old counterpart.

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* * *

The midterm for the second semester of my senior year was going to be included in the rolling admissions process. If I were to be honest, I was very nervous about getting into a university on time. Because there was no guarantee that nothing would go wrong during the national exams. Whenever something important came up, my weak stomach would often churn and make me sick.

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I needed to go to college on a perfect student record no matter what, and in order to do that, I needed to get through my midterm in perfect condition. However…

When I saw the marks on my mock exam, I seized my hair.

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“Haa…”

A sigh burst out of my lips. Nothing was abnormal about today. All that occurred this morning was a short conversation with my mother. As I was leaving through the front door, my mother drank her coffee in the living room and criticized my outfit.

“Has your skirt shrunk?”

“No…”

Only six months had passed since I got measured for my new school uniform after I transferred schools. There was no reason to get my new uniform adjusted, and I didn’t have the time to worry about something like that.

Because I knew better than anyone that I wouldn’t suddenly become popular in school just because my skirt grew shorter by a few centimeters.

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“Goodbye.”

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I murmured my goodbye and opened the front door. Before the door closed behind me, I heard her final words.

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“Don’t go around looking cheap. It’s more embarrassing for me.”

My heart prickled as if she had rubbed salt on a wound. I couldn’t help but fret over my clothes during school and during my tutoring sessions. I glanced around me. Although everyone else had the same skirt length as me, for some reason, I felt that mine was shorter. Now I was even concerned about my breasts that pushed against my blouse.

Therefore, because of this, I failed my practice midterm at my tutoring academy. Whenever something like this happened, my brittle mentality became exceptionally gloomy.

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But I had an inkling as to why my mother said something so needless like that. Ever since a week ago, she began to shoot me suspicious looks. Right after I came home with Professor Lee.

However, I did nothing wrong. I didn’t do anything to deserve this, so I needed to be confident. But like a fool, I was worried about my mother’s feelings, and I kept making mistakes on my exam, making me feel even more like an idiot.

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“Get it together. Please.”

I chewed on my cheeks as I said this over and over again to myself. Realizing that my goal was right in front of my nose, my sweaty hand gripped my mechanical pencil.

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