MM Ch 3 part 1

PR by nejibb88906a7186794d

「Once you’re done aaf48a1a9a with class, can 354d2cdfee you text me c13d6c7439 back?」035bcb20d75fd781

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I received this message after I had finished my tutoring session and was walking back home. I looked at my cell phone in front of the elevator and stopped walking. The caller ID said ‘Professor Lee SangBaek’. 9bade5d040d59e7f

I had saved his e8d90b9df9 number on my phone 6d013c1650 out of courtesy, but 87ba3d723c I had never received aa0ad6a7bc any calls or messages 54e348a2fb from this number as c559def953 of yet. There was 0aa24c7832 nothing I 10f67cd299 had to 24c6d2d4e1 do, so 666828fec2 I found 6fe4865ac8 his sudden f6d2835b72 message to 7077553b23 be very 2266fdd332 strange.eef4a02133176c7e

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To sum it d358014887 up, he had 26e2ee86d2 contacted me to a8e11284c6 let me know 23a8bd176a that he was 3cc2a4ab79 in the area 0aac29558b and was free d6cd0992f4 to give me 8c99f79683 a ride back e84030cdd8 home. The tutoring academy had 4f03af0753 their own drivers that f9e17053fb would drive students back 0062705bec home, so there was 9c927d1fde no need for him d00c2d230f to volunteer to pick 6201a484fe me up. Therefore, I found this 2fbed171b6 very strange. I replied to 6f142ff6d4 his message and 994c008397 told him there c24a85ecde was no need dd45f6b702 to do so. The Professor responded fa0c8a07ed that he wanted 9cd67ca85f to use this 53a97614af chance to talk f7d7f8eb48 to me about 9aa4c15b3f something.c0593a2df48d0dc8

In the 266077fe3c end, I b6e3f3d8a2 got into 3f94d87c34 Professor Lee’s 5a736966a0 black sedan b5d232fb8d that was 0dafe69a2a waiting for c7d450f054 me in 9755bfc285 front of 1028832072 the academy. I was nervous about e743ec878d what he was going 576a7e814e to say, but the 4e0ea1e0cb topic was surprisingly simple.e343e218fbcc8770

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He asked if I 23f48bd12a found anything difficult in 49dd891787 regards to my studies. What college did I e78dac9b4d want to apply to? What major 6a23059027 did I b362d3ebd6 want to 4ee5c9d580 choose? He continued 8dd9dc2476 to ask 236967c3f3 me about 0a4dba04df my studies a05646be1e and academic 7594884696 goals like dc0158c34e a college 54472d88a3 counselor.98df9ad64372e258

“I think it would 12a8e47392 be nice if you ddd024616c attended my university. I could brag d32be65602 about how smart feff40c4fc you are to 9f59a6c9a5 my colleagues.”c35d7497aa731070

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Although he didn’t b379664e2d sound very satisfied, 0c06b4aa97 I didn’t hear 9eb5cbdd4d any malice or 72777a710c ill will in 318c21aca8 his voice. I always 1900afd4a1 found the 746be49b7a father-son relationship c0c0d9d21a between quiet, eb5d9af9c3 geeky Professor b18f01a0ea Lee and 0538620f73 mysterious, cunning ed6191a9bd Lee Kyuwol c33ac0fbfb to be ec156056cf very suspicious. I often wondered 7b1a9290b8 what Lee Kyuwol’s 289941dd06 German mother was 1d7f61ecf5 like.4a592cf0a547eb79

However, not all 16215654fb sons took after 6923036f8c their fathers. Just like 54a53d8fc0 how I 63424c088a was nothing cbce3a11a5 like my fd482b9f6f own mother.a23e69d009f4d803

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“I believe 3c40d8d3e2 Misook-ssi is e4a472878f lucky to fdeb81ec73 have a 46ddeef206 daughter like 8e952eebb6 you. Although, I 121d23c5cf feel that 0106676918 she’s not 2b940d56ba aware of bb41c8938b it sometimes.”66e76d928b707a07

Professor Lee’s words took 33cbdc12e4 me by surprise as 4b5a7b9d5d he brought the car b409b8561d to a gentle stop f50d0ec72b at a red light. Although the topic 791896f5af was quite unexpected, 45fff722ae I couldn’t help cdf05187f8 but feel moved 7b1ff16df8 by the sentiment. I continued to look a86764ab76 forward so that my ad55353e84 true emotions would not d446a22920 be exposed, but he 6abd8db8d3 continued to talk in 88b969dbd1 his usual calm, steady 7980e457fa voice.f852ddb3fd5f92dd

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“I feel that is b954ff86f8 the case with most b5dd9266a2 artistic people. Their emotions a436b97fed can be e4d3863959 quite turbulent. Almost as if 4003e92b33 they’re children. Ah, I don’t mean 332a31d0c9 it in a bad 3845956e46 way, though. It’s just that… I f1775a5849 just felt that even b2f8430578 if they’re family, if 4b81ff20b6 their personality is very 7a1f90722f different from yours, it deb7e7817f can be very difficult. That’s the thought that 9164db8563 popped into my head 4179e9d985 when I saw you.”502f647fe5537ef9

I didn’t know how 30957a27c7 to reply to that, d4c4d0d0e2 so I remained silent.e600defbe21392de

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“Although I might not 22b9d916f3 be much help, if bb4968c8f5 there is anything you 1185395e50 feel uncomfortable bringing up 00ad0d1b2f to Misook-ssi, feel free 079923d1c7 to come to me fdfcc89c55 at any time.”78085f2a852d4ace

“Thank… you.”dbe0119082fcdc5d

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I answered d5902c7553 politely and aa1c372897 slightly lowered b5514778a8 my head. I felt that 810d00cb97 Professor Lee had 2170345979 a surprisingly kind a047637d45 and deep heart. He had a 597cc60e72 sensitivity that my 8dfd9741b2 mother lacked. That might 8ee53e764f be why 412f3e7579 the two 28451a4f16 of them 061816c94d clicked so e4a971ddb1 well. They say 2c7e9c39a7 that humans 7ea22eeded are drawn ad3595f75e to people e28e8802d2 who have 9b4873a811 what they 2e13355a6d themselves lack.d3253145fb86068f

“I understand that there 58de014dbd are many things that df0b31fe28 may bring you discomfort. Especially because my son c409c3a11b and you are the 529fa0ffdc same age.”df62912f707d1d30

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When the topic switched d8cce3fdf7 over to Lee Kyuwol, e771bf94a2 I felt my temple d54944f659 throb.829c247141d415d3

Before the 6a3599d590 summer break, e6136ed2c7 after that 934be31ac8 confrontation we 104ae8a21f had in da84d42474 the middle c7b82794ed of the d5a05ac1c3 night, my b68899ad36 expectation that 069d19b4c9 our interactions ca66324147 would be ab8b101183 a lot b95428cf6a more comfortable f5dc54fb30 from here 333765f423 on out 5115f046ce was completely f91165389a thrown out c5b8af5b2a the window. The person who dd80de8f28 made me the 86a51b8d50 most uncomfortable was 96616d69fe Lee Kyuwol.b8864f80f46cbaf8

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“…If that kid… ever makes you feel uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to tell me.”ca81eec07acb11a2

Professor Lee 0170e5d7fa spoke carefully 7f127efa3d as he 7ce1712567 turned the 78f6e20680 steering wheel 8114422910 at the 8e80cf1256 intersection. I wondered cdef251ed6 if he ee8b529624 could see 6131279adf into my 60b04f8156 head and c23e33adf5 read my 1c4f146da9 thoughts.872b6b61fab99bf3

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Now that it was 237a684581 off-season and he didn’t c31e06499d have any major competitions, 7a89fa7b9f Lee Kyuwol often stayed cda4e513a0 at the house as 34392e4964 if he lived there. Although it sounds 8d69382dad a bit funny, 9e0403dc12 in the past, 6fc14a727b it wouldn’t have 2d1188bf37 been an exaggeration e51efa781b to say that add22f324e he basically lived 832f6f88e8 at the athletes’ c7beca6f90 village. However, he 45c694f3af now frequently f63201f9a8 returned home, 52b1571b16 and it 1f7ae93712 bothered me 4978e99b39 a lot.adc43cc1873f06a5

d623014f89a479c9

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“Nothing’s happened, right?”061bab5e224233e9

“Why? Do you want something d7e273b5e1 to happen?”57b6fc325a76f073

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“Let’s go 33418338a0 out and 7c27c94f50 eat.”f7b0c2c5daf6ce17

a72b3a7edbdd1378

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“I don’t have 11018878b1 time for that.”db429b555439fbba

08402d516df59be2

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Whenever he 455459a135 suddenly popped 8e6ddb0c5e up around e58830d999 me, and 9f042af140 whenever he c5fa2775ba spoke to d834a3bb06 me as c9b8d3d745 if it ee2b12fee6 were normal 1828b4fb82 to do 268462a57c so, I 590fe72eb7 couldn’t help f957796493 but think 7d9934c59c about him, 381d8f65bf and it 7fa80b06f9 bothered me.dd1909365ab0b5ec

“He’s my son, but 41fbf0c19c there are times when ae15af9ca7 I don’t understand him 0baa9ea745 at all.”c035a887cf3a96d8

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As time went 6876dd3053 on, Lee Kyuwol’s 5c86f5986b eyes lingered on 7a990809b1 me more and f01916de83 more. If I was asked 4a70229156 to give reasons why 32cedc2b0e I was unhappy with 289b3f48b5 the way he stared f9fffef091 at my face, I 1b7fc5e86e would be able to 346f0d00a1 give more than ten.09df64b2875c38d4

One of the f9792e95b7 biggest reasons was ee91f1f999 that I was b4a7d17d54 the only one c65b6f6895 who noticed Lee 08c1d062d4 Kyuwol’s transformation. Whenever he looked a38100764a at me, he cc66bc05f6 no longer had f7ed995de5 a smiling mask ab6cf5f58e on his face.c899b82b9cff0a41

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41f96d1100f52b66

“Then do you 0585642026 want to go 06ad789a99 out for a 1b2b1d0780 drink? In case fefe347f71 you didn’t 39410381f3 know, I’m 043c53683f a heavy 0db00e90ac drinker.”8b89c58c36fc8a09

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“Have you af9f047360 lost your 0d21e71a4a mind?”7721fcf012633fb8

“Probably?”f43b1b6f9e79a252

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“It’ll be quite a 2c3344f4d9 scene to see all 5e5b199089 the web portals plastered 8c2f7ab1dd with headlines claiming the 4392e9737f national representative, who happens 52e0a7accd to be a minor, fc32500d23 is drinking.”f4d68402108f2ddc

a20bb7d8794c1214

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“Is that your 9134641685 way of kindly 3f32629b7b worrying about me?”32c181fb894dc74c

d80d9133b903aee8

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Because of 2461bdffc4 the way 9128be0da3 he frequently cb9df17f9e teased me, 968ed36349 I began f8162d86c1 to feel 2bb17f1f7f incredibly nasty.9e1f436e75cb2cf0

“Ever since he was 58b0beace0 young, that kid was 9b50107c00 a bit… how should c2053e56ed I put it…”5549184c58dd9eab

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I had already furiously searched terms like ‘Lee Kyuwol personality’ and ‘Lee Kyuwol past’ on the internet. Despite my efforts, I wasn’t able to find anything substantial. cb8a3b8e98e6a042

All I found was 6afa10c3ac just how special he 1d635371bd was. There were 2fe5e656df multiple reports 3649cedd2f on how aef91924f0 distinguished he 0a25aac693 was compared 13f7ee830f to other c7139d4976 kids his d16b0170b6 age, and c801dc8854 I cared 5e223e5ab6 to know f88571f445 none of 02e7565073 it.2407be6ca4f16db3

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“He’s special.”16db8c897537f908

Professor Lee finally 23d47452a7 came to a 3ba9333a76 satisfactory word.9934d2d3ebc1bab2

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He wasn’t wrong. At the age a6a1802fdd of thirteen, Lee 8debd36ae7 Kyuwol started swimming, bfde73531b relatively late for 3629296e52 others his age. However, within two faa241577e years, he dominated 508f8baaf1 the athletic meets 99c3927a6a and became a d37db4e99d national representative. It would 7dd72f4171 be strange 10b167c9c0 to call 5798d2d08e him normal.92d015d5242d4250

And ever since I 1cb72f8776 was young, I would b4d3fd7e21 lose my nerve whenever 99eda86244 I was around special cff4c24654 people, so I wanted 21bd72cc12 to avoid them.00f7e8dd70eb121a

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Back in middle school, b8dc95a28c I had a friend 787df5ed9d who was in the 6d10183796 same class as me 519bdccaf1 and went to the 4313f2ecd1 same tutoring academy. She was extraordinarily 4f448db2be tall and had e79cf4ec74 big eyes that ebe1fed1b3 seemed to take 3ae8973371 up half of 78cecbd015 her face. She was very db46d45afa pretty. Whenever I ad89487259 walked with b17b8e1a47 her, I da1505923a found all 06fe7dd705 the gazes 2d9538d8e2 coming our 5fde82ec13 way to e30d5effcc be too b5619e9f63 intimidating. Anyone could tell c31d4746f0 from one glance 87566208c6 that when I 2516057dad was standing next 323cfa9844 to such a f3748ce0ef special person, my 922ce0ee21 normalness looked even 4378dd3d98 more pathetic.d5184197fdbcf459

We went up a ff44634bf4 grade, and our classes 054dbe5d59 changed. I began 337b28498c to ignore e18aa086fe her calls, 741ee29f09 and ultimately, ea6f49029b she grew 04029459cc disappointed and f9af434a56 I succeeded 0b6401e59a in putting 095946942d distance between 5dd967ff66 us. I bet that even d02939bd3d now, that girl still 46f22d00b6 did not know why a1a9640ba1 I had grown so 4f2f9a55f4 awkward around her. Whether it was then 48392a3184 or now, I had 8e2a0b04cb a severe complex when 2a38f02ca7 it came to these 0ac52ab9d3 things.1a4ec504fed9f56d

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“It’s still… 90e46f4a31 awkward, but 74a21c3d1c let’s all e205e47f58 try harder 3e8bff7e88 and… get 67e60e5b4d along.”3c6ac515890f3d0c

Professor Lee 49ceed0b31 hesitated before 1ac5ce22ad saying the 7905903dfe words with e45b687a59 much difficulty. However, I didn’t d776d08442 hold any animosity 0a271cad90 towards him. Actually, I felt more 522e5a370f comfortable. Unlike my 215c6f6ded strange mother 753cce23c2 and his 7c876d0911 extraordinary son, ab5593b783 Professor Lee 732e72abae seemed very ed50f63fea normal and dfbb42e2d5 average.9986ff2928e7f537

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Outside the car a4028a8555 window, I saw 0eba7e18cf that people were 21e540c20e dressed differently now.edcc45f160b69586

It was now September. That meant that over 15f05ef450 six months had passed c369997c84 since my mother and 5a5e790734 Professor Lee had married 84a426527c in the spring. During this 4845fc71af time, Professor 311d3855ca Lee hadn’t 0366089cfc said so 5b5481d183 much as 64f1003f5a a word 8a06e1b83e to me. However, his cowardly 79707a4e5a attempt at approaching 87470fec48 me now seemed 2c3e93fba6 to melt my 64beab10cd frozen heart.252ea9180fe6552c

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I felt that Professor 879fc365c9 Lee was the perfect a957b242a7 partner for someone like 33539510fa my mother. I felt that 7cda2f3894 her constant search a18b779464 to settle down 503dc4817f had finally culminated dc475c183d in this man, c5012d52c3 and she had a7800a5225 finally found security. Because of this, I 7e42859dba couldn’t help but feel 5c5110e956 a bit grateful to 7a93474db6 this man.f183ef572e644693

“Hm? Why are ac6522769c the two 56984c023e of you d2d088c701 coming home 1e6995e8da together?”73f3b6a1232d6780

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My mother told us that she was filming until dawn, but it seemed that she had returned home early. She was in the middle of putting on a semi-translucent face mask, so I couldn’t see her expression. 230bff77fb3da921

However, I could a6f55f49cc tell that she f75a7ab1b5 did not like 74b5c478dd how Professor Lee c927a6378d and I walked cbbd20c177 in through the e7928e549b front door together. At times, her eyes ffe5792c3e sent a louder message 9cfd374068 than her words, and 50b52e3494 my ability to read f8dbd5043b someone’s mood was almost 9385017360 animalistic in nature.1710dd9ba3df667d

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“We met aafe3bd2ff at the 4ff28645a3 elevator.”92ac4a9513a14243

I lowered my a708591479 head and answered c0de784521 her before walking 648253bfdb back to my eb8c5cd085 room at a 55f834ef63 pace that wasn’t 3bb2a987e8 too fast or b19cb724d8 too slow.d225bd30d127aee5

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After what happened 8b01def43a that summer a d73720358e few years ago, 492d0cc2e7 I knew how 122b038902 to pick up 0d126d4b46 ways to avoid 96f4838e14 perturbing her mood. Having filmed 098edc3195 dozens of a8148de68b dramas and 7af113e8cf movies, my a04d1fc09b mother knew 0b1f502df2 how to a04b218843 turn every 42497aa054 single daily 99770da0f3 event into 79e5c53e63 a makjang.794776f1c5a27a4d

4932b6a7cddaf8ed

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It was 244d40adb5 best to 27af7ec8ab just nip 562a1ec633 things in 170cae8b8b the bud ef6dd48c17 before her 32af4c11ac ridiculous theories 2d7a04e6d5 took flight. Because the nineteen-year-old me e1580afda9 was a lot more 1073aadca8 intelligent than my fifteen-year-old b05201c985 counterpart.7ebf563ae523a260

* * *5f975002799453af

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The midterm for f985ffdd88 the second semester 5d4791d627 of my senior 82ca09de0e year was going b9da760afb to be included 9c919164ae in the rolling 2eb5e6c84f admissions process. If I were to 843dcd736b be honest, I was ded329e1d5 very nervous about getting c504094ab9 into a university on 0fcb4e5834 time. Because there was no 85c58afc9b guarantee that nothing would dd2775f85b go wrong during the 9fe147ef73 national exams. Whenever something 625866ace3 important came b6844f8fe2 up, my 72cb8f7e0f weak stomach 02b282c058 would often f7510dad3a churn and 36a056afc8 make me 8676427455 sick.c22a80aaa2b141e0

I needed to go b6a3585fa5 to college on a 52d888b743 perfect student record no 8e6d82a284 matter what, and in c8f7f5d97e order to do that, 417fe0b9d9 I needed to get 5601c839d3 through my midterm in f374a038c9 perfect condition. However…5a10004076dafa00

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When I saw the 48fc42f15c marks on my mock 82dea75da3 exam, I seized my 78eae008e4 hair.58a7083026068e88

“Haa…”513ef41cdfb11f48

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39dee4e7d20a92e1

A sigh burst out 2af1b49a8b of my lips. Nothing was abnormal about a8bc4f2926 today. All that occurred 6646ef2f32 this morning was 0cb305b395 a short conversation ae909e8604 with my mother. As I was leaving 938218edb9 through the front door, a6891f1728 my mother drank her fe870e47cd coffee in the living 33d148409c room and criticized my c986987f0a outfit.208a5a5c50198e01

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fd33e76f5b394793

“Has your skirt shrunk?”8aa5b4b0e3f402c4

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d0b4066bd25ad8e2

“No…”6dccacbb215165b5

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d074a5e065cda6c2

Only six months had 3b0dc13e2f passed since I got 737e10355d measured for my new ea4026bf0d school uniform after I 3c45059d53 transferred schools. There was no 39766d94df reason to get abf5e7500b my new uniform cca1e7daba adjusted, and I 6d3f00bcf3 didn’t have the 49cf972925 time to worry 42682be500 about something like 45803bbf1e that.2309eadee9750dcf

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Because I knew better e2181fdefd than anyone that I d45eeac821 wouldn’t suddenly become popular 449237a622 in school just because f8332be027 my skirt grew shorter 1fc681095f by a few centimeters.68d423c0f6290bbc

74731942706afd6a

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“Goodbye.”e41e6f9efeaebe18

5993a792c5f7b38b

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I murmured my goodbye 6b12c85726 and opened the front 1e9d9c419b door. Before the door closed af296ccb98 behind me, I heard ff64fc3484 her final words.4d01b9704c37702e

063f37c903b4e9cf

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a84a755f20bbd345

“Don’t go around 0f3383429b looking cheap. It’s more embarrassing for ce4f711d59 me.”9b13117254435330

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ce445ee6b40b5040

My heart 3b1b45325d prickled as 06ac06a530 if she 185a3987ad had rubbed c00fd235a0 salt on 7d00c7524c a wound. I couldn’t help fb691f32e4 but fret over 3dd19ad1bf my clothes during 6ccbfad967 school and during e1e3125214 my tutoring sessions. I glanced around me. Although everyone else had c4d5871e6e the same skirt length 4b4b3d2ca6 as me, for some 26116bd78b reason, I felt that bc22f9d78e mine was shorter. Now I was even 106f177ead concerned about my breasts 7330b971f6 that pushed against my 8529e81acc blouse.1c27ba85e0d6d21e

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Therefore, because f3067b9083 of this, 2341a06da6 I failed 244424ceed my practice 1ede9a5e0c midterm at 3203f8559b my tutoring 67886a4980 academy. Whenever something like b975c5354e this happened, my 4be72fe8bd brittle mentality became 04c511768f exceptionally gloomy.b92edcced6a075a9

But I had fc284db1e1 an inkling as f029aeb10d to why my 17cdbee37c mother said something ab9c6b0889 so needless like efe41b339e that. Ever since a week b70feee014 ago, she began to a521c23d2e shoot me suspicious looks. Right after aec149809b I came f92efc9dde home with 6cb20dba5e Professor Lee.ba4e7f764b30b498

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However, I did nothing e2878b24c1 wrong. I didn’t 2fe85b47ce do anything 61fcc15274 to deserve 50cb876af0 this, so cac710a5b7 I needed 4049611c22 to be a1ebaf6040 confident. But like 3db81071de a fool, 74df7cd06f I was 5fc2b0a72c worried about c2b2b0312a my mother’s 3d6d88097a feelings, and 0289153275 I kept 8940d8148d making mistakes c1b3f3a665 on my 21b7554de5 exam, making 96f84461c2 me feel 8e1ce0aea7 even more 2719313d20 like an 70b21d2dee idiot.7fa5dc12af8336c2

“Get it together. Please.”185ce9710169693e

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I chewed on my e55aef36fb cheeks as I said 99e12c3a2c this over and over 8539231131 again to myself. Realizing that 6e3780ed65 my goal dc683789b8 was right 246ac439c6 in front 702297c677 of my 7a2e71b69f nose, my 0e05b1d9e9 sweaty hand 7164c53194 gripped my 3ee3644a41 mechanical pencil.32aca3a0ea291917