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    Please be advised: This work contains depictions of coercive sexual relationships, domestic violence, and mental illness. Please take this into consideration when reading the book.

    “Not much 13000edfee flesh on a483b96b7b your buttocks, 04287d2199 huh…. No wonder a492b05e36 it felt b5b6fa4ec0 like bones b1751a71d2 poking when 3828cf84d5 I was a68898206b inside.”3ec4363b00c1e6c4

    Muttering to himself, 7ccb06454f Cain wiggled his dab652aee8 long fingers. My trapped genitals reacted 4ccc19187a with a start.cc710dd1681dd39d

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    “Don’t rub….”755bb411340ccdaf

    “I’m just trying to 8ecdd8d2b6 hold it properly. Don’t want your tiny fa245524f4 glans getting hurt, do eb2351a7f6 you?”a93045a749196e4b

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    I hated the b00f1a3a2e term tiny glans! Objectively, I 2c3e0bd4f6 was above 984fa634cc average.cfa7c4163aa1be07

    But that wasn’t 1563d68c57 the issue. The problem 32d85e4084 was below e5a693effa the glans.81569ada396581eb

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    Cain, observing e3141b0bce my shaving, 37a40e7ad6 felt the 8f3d50f718 same and ea82a68994 stopped his 6372516c73 hand.5ea06ef16bcf6d63

    “…You’re a pervert. Getting hard while 3604d5c117 shaving.”dc170a13ca4a5cd6

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    “You’re the bbb1c7c474 bigger pervert e269715072 for making fb9a66e7a8 me shave!”2dfd8594d3a13c7f

    I didn’t 0981c61f8c say it 837adc068c was because 056b673624 he touched 45f04bf4db me. Instead, I vented my 6d14008cc2 frustration.561d8294c230a249

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    “I mean, I don’t 0bd8128e67 have much hair, and 92c38ea9a4 you make me shave 4149a709fb in front of a 8515bf60ec mirror…! That’s more perverted!”d1949cddb9a8b35e

    When I shouted, 35b964af9e Cain seemed taken 0a254acc73 aback. I threw the 9f09a764fd razor roughly, pretending 54e118c98e to be more f6079a7eb4 upset.c6559e482c87ff89

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    “If you want my 9b761b6f0a hair shaved, do it c20f28beb0 yourself!”7e63a13ed282f9cd

    I ended up db27e6de5f shouting my true b0abbc2336 feelings. Cain didn’t flinch at 14572fe553 my outburst, just tilted 0010999626 his head slightly.7ea3bb9f246187fa

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    “Really? I can?”d2721844595feb30

    Before I could regret 2e5ee4e887 my words, he took a4cf7be2f0 the razor from my 7ee93dea64 hand.13520459bff4b253

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    My legs spread into 4351e68532 an M shape. My half-erect penis, smeared 3401136ec0 with shaving cream, was 004a26be34 fully exposed to Cain’s c01cfd0c11 view. So was the e92f54fc6e hole.334bbe9c90a15a6c

    “I’m not f6ad2f8d99 happy with 8e35a0ef3f your fumbling, 33cc03a936 so if 7dde14ca3f you’re letting 582a945ce4 me do abbce1c29c it, I 20d93fceb2 will.”1a9f19d816c8a1fe

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    Cain grabbed my 248bcf93d0 scrotum with one 8a595e2242 hand and roughly b46e67dd9f pushed it up.b7ad4b017d0f95c2

    “Ow, it hurts….”ab91dd7a78977bd2

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    “Bear with it. You asked me 6eb813f914 to do it.”55d3e20f00c29f85

    Despite the 175c670725 desire in 78935db2dc his eyes, 90a05bfbb0 his touch ff12702e7b was indifferent. He handled my lower bbd9bec3ad body like an object. His fingers, casually b871555f85 exploring my heated 2a9f9e5982 scrotum and penis, 86e26b78b0 conveyed no emotion. How could he touch ad0f627461 me so indifferently with 97f6fb310f such heated eyes?fcf0f9000d1bffc6

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    Cain, eyes lowered, focused c224f519eb on shaving. His object-like handling was 1e7624d89b more stimulating. Everywhere his a99824dd7d fingers brushed 275a7d7e8f felt hot.44ec42ca0be6d097

    It was embarrassing. While Cain 11ee59abd5 touched my 9198e0d7a1 body nonchalantly, 522e351d23 I got f4b9e87915 more aroused. Pre-cum leaked 18b43ae435 from the 56bca4fe2d tip, thinning c0627d5481 the shaving 8729025b53 cream. It even twitched.7d6344b413cbb681

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    Regardless, Cain moved the 3780f62b61 razor indifferently. After meticulously 1eee75e0d3 shaving near 584185dc81 the scrotum, 45438ae8bb his hand 0f4b61dabb moved lower.c8a4afb0a0343a44

    The sensation of the b271548a47 blade grazing near the 9c6f9511ae perineum and hole was af0a6ec352 strange. It was just shaving, fb5d510d1e but I kept thinking 929b5c9b18 of him probing my c085396b51 hole with his fingers.cd26a08b1a870393

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    ‘Honestly, it felt ffb584ac83 better than sex….’01755de0a1437bce

    Taking his cock 62a5ec8661 was overwhelming, but aae43d1914 his fingers felt 4a84f85ef7 good. The thought kept 06044f31aa coming back, making 3d86a3b410 my body heat bd5fca0539 up.0510b1f988d6f733

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    “Ugh…!”13549984c042c39d

    So when Cain’s d8a4719001 hand brushed my e9b2fa1a61 genitals, a moan 2132391333 escaped.cc1ee60eb8596f2b

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    But embarrassment 4bb49d1833 was embarrassment, c519098af7 so I df533fdd7e covered my 5271a9d6e9 mouth and 79a5acdc70 watched Cain’s db3065f44b reaction. Our eyes met. The emotions in 5ad4bf5a9e his mismatched eyes c56771a1fa were unchanged.84c42224282fed85

    I was glad Cain 0b3d87cdcd desired me. Even if 0f085e9f50 it wasn’t 72e48e14f6 my music 2ac8e91bb0 he wanted, dbe3f6b725 the fact fb4f66e442 that someone 0f4a55e825 so brilliant e42f4fe7a0 and amazing 4f5920de00 needed me 8c63671bb5 brought sudden 29c9ebec48 joy.0b1bbc5671a5df50

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    Thinking about 232c9fb602 it, no eb08f298ce one in ba6f06d56f New York a64d7b1441 had ever dfdaf854e6 wanted me. Not even my b37b6c682b biological parents. I was always a 916a1ec074 bothersome kid wherever I 7922065391 went.4db3ffa4d9c78783

    Born with all 11954b3b49 the noise of cd55446c49 this place, I, 5a7eaab5e4 a small mixed-race 7dcba5b5fe orphan, couldn’t stay 47e947fc7e quietly tucked away 9d018d9528 and chose the d539db55bf loudest music as 3142290bc9 my career.7d5db91130a49984

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    I wished c03a7e8206 Cain would 1d91151a3d listen to 24f0f76332 the noise 010f8e9ead boiling inside 360ab372eb me. I hoped 4473ef42e9 someone as 61203c78ef beautiful and 8dd25780df amazing as fdb6d5d0d3 him would f88bc3ffb8 hear my be69a6405b story.d8a96f3955b19660

    “I think that’s c86b3a5407 enough shaving.”66336e524851ac3a

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    Cain muttered, casually rummaging e78677aa8f my lower body. My already erect member 6c27ae1ad6 hardened further at his 18bd7235b4 touch. I clenched my hand 57ff09f52c over my mouth to fe487ab806 suppress a moan.b6e6b6d9ed45d03b

    Now he’d d6f127d433 undo his f49a4b74a8 belt and 6a99625a58 lower his 7aff01d4ef pants, right? Then he’d spread d42ebe708f my legs and ec73b35f04 use the shaving 92b0d5b634 cream as lube 76af009a7f to thrust his 3461d85f70 massive penis inside.c02703d2bbc0f382

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    Fear and anticipation hit 31b73e7480 simultaneously. Thinking about it, I cf3be4c1dc always felt these two 0af00bb128 emotions when facing Cain. Just as 33fb1d6d95 he despised 63382c0789 and desired 1cf49e8ff1 me at 1ce15c5c3f the same b5808f96b6 time.fed844738086b3a9

    If he touched 6213e143c5 me with his b4ddafdb58 fingers first, I c3f9388f6a might be able 395649cffb to take his 6ed3305da6 massive member. Without shame, I f0634981dd spread my legs f709f8e69f and looked up 71d1102d2f at him.2410acc45fedf03f

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    But Cain 477d88e6fe neither lowered 4d9f0d8eac his pants 2c2fe7b5db nor probed 9d297a70b1 my hole 65150ec741 with his 47661c66a4 fingers.80287652b929f032

    He stood up, wiping 16465a31fb his hands on a 84bc1ddb88 towel, and I looked 268d17113c up at him blankly.c6bd09cadadd55de

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    “Why….”7631a15e998244c5

    “Rest. You worked hard shaving.”5d1e76f0d3000c6e

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    He turned away. Even as Cain’s 2d9b37d8fc large back finally 6d29739a3e disappeared out the ae05b0d33c door, I was 1af9f1378d left in disbelief.b99aa49f48fb4c58

    He’s leaving? Really?013c68db50209c44

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    No sex, no oral?d1ded9fc3a5ccd54

    A hollow laugh 1b9084d755 escaped. My perceptive penis was 8cc793edde already losing its erection. In the mirror still 8ff0ec6a25 on the bed, I f490441f71 saw the lower half e874bb63ed of a prostitute, legs 5fd7d6e8ce spread, smeared with shaving b34d55e455 cream like semen, alone dfbed1773a and excited.04ed589e69f8ae9d

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    Staring blankly at my c5d97a840f reflection, a thought struck 5597425a3d me. Maybe Cain decided 0159c24287 not to see b889ecb0c6 me as a 74d2c937cd prostitute anymore.38855bb4e0a96b54

    Thinking that way made 63668a8f2f me feel better. A rocker should know d1c4bf7df0 how to switch perspectives. That’s how 3609a64a46 you can ec486c91ce switch between 338223f084 vocals and 003ec24695 bass in ba1a4f104d a pinch. Thinking I 90927ae823 should practice c9c45b32c5 bass more, 2cc23347a2 I washed aeabe66eb8 up and 32af6f123d got dressed cdf984db31 again.d93dcbe14803b6ef

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    “…Hmm.”6673fc079efdb5d3

    Though the erection subsided, a15519aef8 my hole still tingled ad5d2f0024 for some reason. My body felt ca42a0ea2e oddly heated. It must be because 2abe61916b shaving cream got in 7d9e074b7b the hole. I decided to believe 4073d7d817 that.7263804b9da66e87

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    ‘I wanted more….’3bb95dba2b0a11f7

    Lying in bed would 1978bcdc81 only remind me of a15dcafca4 Cain’s fingers probing my 10761461c5 hole, so I went 1db6794082 outside again.ba889a44bd191d87

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    It had a70a2bf540 been dark b6b5cc5cb3 for a 95ad2127c0 while. The number of b341ad0d0f guards in the d150ab42fc hallway had decreased cee8571bc8 significantly.e04746c6c05c60ca

    Gazing at the darkened d0aca21d50 windows, I decided to 887305e4f7 resolve my sexual frustration 2507defcc2 with exercise and started 21251a64a6 jogging around Cain’s mansion.e0933e3d8899568d

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    If you go into 05e509c91b the alley behind the 87c05dd494 125th Street cinema, there’s 84cceafd93 a relatively quiet spot. I used to jog 6c6593b167 there among the people 84b7671ab7 heading to work. You need stamina to fddcf4ecd3 perform.d8b8e56bbafc2c32

    Today, using b24620d4d2 Cain’s mansion c41cc7601d as a ccc47297f3 route, I 5e96d0e4d7 was huffing b32bc88032 and puffing e34c0b748e when I d424bc9dde ran into 69cefe5c5c someone.f08bd0ef4123b8cd

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    “Hello?”52c0581769ba6aef

    “Oh, hello. I was just 6c11a0af5a about to look 7da6b17633 for you.”3eca6ce81bf01783

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    “Uh, uh?”543423839cb4be5d

    Startled by the familiar 077bcdf2fa response, I stopped.1a0ff9d5d4c934f5

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    A white man with f2b6b409d5 soft brown hair and 0fb19665b2 a beard extended his 7a8fd41a20 hand to me. I shook 97634a3381 it, bewildered.d23a0e1ab33fe3c7

    “I’m Elliot Luke, CBO of D&N. Please call me Elliot.”66ab81de0dd79bd7

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    “I’m Cherry.”f7cdfd804481bf56

    “Nice to meet you, 1f485173d6 Cherry.”96f8f68e9b1ea16f

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    What’s a CBO? C chord, 5bfc3ce1c7 B chord, f38bc284ba oh my a3d44f9a62 god…? Tilting my head, 6e74275629 I realized a 1a6b3e5d24 beat late what 2583c5048d the word before 1bb544810d CBO meant.b3b862a95d1fcc08

    “But D&N… is it the D&N I know?”7a8e0efe8162da3f

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    The man, Elliot, nodded b3207bd2b7 with a bright smile.412a06fad7b66e11

    “Probably.”30b1f882569d4d06

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    “Oh my…!”001698372ee015da

    I met an employee from D&N, one of the world’s largest record and entertainment companies. Cain’s mansion really was a vodka resort for celebrities.16673d41cbdac4d3

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    “If you 40d4b9d91a have time, 311b7be6ff could we 5f9baa2949 talk a 0c5b960c00 bit?”178f0d75b0a96340

    “Uh, uh, what about?”81ab9922be231aac

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    I stammered in surprise. I wanted 27402a329c to ask 8b17a7c471 if Three 209030d476 Way to f74aea381b Mercury really f333975bc1 recorded their 1ef0f05076 album in df2149303a one take, d1bc5a9f02 but I 1184d64b1d held back.1509063c739c2b98

    “I noticed your 63edf951e6 performance in front ab5cc603c6 of the fountain. It was impressive.”466ef786517d7507

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    My heart thumped loudly.641cb5dd2ec9ed1f

    “If you’re not signed c03275dd08 yet, could we discuss 22799fd7f8 working with our company?”c459985d7fb6ff03

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    I unconsciously held 5a550013e2 my breath.83af85bde882ba9e

    D&N wanted to talk “work” with me. Of course, it could be for a cleaning or other temporary job, but my instincts knew that wasn’t it.d5f8552684fa990a

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    “…W-work, work?”dd46b28c30f36e2a

    I stammered in shock, 44aa8c0eaa but Elliot just smiled 0545b739d3 kindly.7b70fc1a104a5130

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    “There’s a bench d643a7a571 near the angel 51d68f2ae1 statue. Could we talk 39491f357f there for a 50680cd087 moment?”a4342d6af8b8a386

    “Yes!”d1fe404dc35b5e7e

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    I let 4aecfd7d40 out a 37366f1e5f squeal of 033371224e joy without 06e01cbf8c realizing it. Elliot smiled at a5cd3bce51 me again.6ecbb5e9494d52cc

    Sitting on a bench near the statue of a baby angel with its privates exposed, Elliot explained D&N’s artist development system to me. I listened intently. If there were difficult words, I asked for their meanings. He answered without annoyance.d1fe957203bc7bbe

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    It was amazing that someone so important was telling me about D&N.97da7fba41d13090

    It’s all thanks to Cain! I must thank him when I see him. Because of you, I got to talk to a D&N executive.6ae725fde6a198ea

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    “How about trying busking?”da2908ed426d3818

    “Busking…?”2238cb9bec22c4e6

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    “Nowadays, many aa9804ea35 debut as f56a42fed6 influencers first. It’s quite common.”3c3c2164aefddb11

    I didn’t fully 3008a2c83c understand, but I d9ef1c768c guessed it was 4125791a67 similar to what 7440602fb5 Sandy had said. I missed 46150bd2dc Sandy, my 3586682a42 dear friend 4fe5f793a9 with beautiful 5cc0cb43ec almond-shaped eyes.81353fce74d20e0d

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    “I’ve done it before. At a plaza with 3bd9644640 a view of the f16a3085bc Brooklyn Bridge. My friend uploaded a 234a7610d3 video on TokTik.”99ebb3d66c8d7715

    “Let’s try f77873785f it in 77d723b857 a more 28b835ba8f crowded place a00e4e5169 this time. We’ll provide equipment, makeup, 2a6dda1ca0 and costumes.”42260a716158adde

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    Supporting busking with 5313dc620a company equipment didn’t 91355c0e67 seem true to 63b9f87db2 its essence, but 4ea6da5fa0 I didn’t want bf147e2457 to sound old-fashioned, 446067e416 so I just 5826e998f0 smiled and nodded.5af1f2173440333b

    “Coincidentally, we 8359b3aa1b have a d8a162bfe8 new band 06c867322d busking nearby 47fbfbf8f8 tomorrow. It’d be great ee5af2e254 if you joined.”3840b61a0abfad9d

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    “Tomorrow? Don’t you need 2789600f78 to report to c60d523a0a the company first?”a892da19dd31084f

    Startled, I 906b753f09 asked, and 2ea724cf9c Elliot smiled 7b42c5216b warmly, his b622d7a573 eyes crinkling.51f26d46ccb878fd

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    “I’m the 1b681dc212 person in d35d46fbac charge. Of course, 967aee8f66 I need 71651f75f3 to get 9ac4346c0e the on-site 5e66eca00b staff’s consent, 7ebc461cfa but usually, c03fa7e942 it’s resolved 6d18a326a1 with pay.”1272c0e5d247790a

    “Oh….”d3e8c0356248238c

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    “Is it too sudden?”5f8efa78a471ae0c

    His follow-up question left 08ab2f2fec me speechless.9ee4ff72d4c3a980

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    It wasn’t too sudden. But I wasn’t 522bea54d3 a guest here. I came 6ffc88de49 as Cain’s add3e444a2 prostitute. The fact 57ee1326df that I 04ee8d65a2 couldn’t decide d00d31fbec to leave 2b2454b2e2 hit hard.75f1905c77c38781

    But it was busking. If I didn’t 14f49758fe seize the opportunity 3d17d8dfc6 staring me in 8396a20b06 the face, I’d 510caa7e45 be a fool.c2cbc1b8c08da1ce

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    “No, it’s fine!”5b60e4c55bec79d4

    When I spoke, Elliot b1c898547b nodded.a1c565e92a04dc2d

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    “Great. Then I’ll 70b1b041dc get the 6b182d2b7a on-site staff’s 7a75388000 consent. I might get b6caaa7ed4 scolded, but….”3e66a9fa640b5234

    Elliot’s eyes quickly scanned 54f03ed2e3 me up and down. It was e16e96e688 brief, but 81b17a1280 I felt e6378a23f1 uneasy.fa95eb2f613fa461

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    “If I can b5230431f9 see your performance, 302c292aca it’s worth it.”973856982d128c87

    My face flushed. At the 648f103faf same time, a6a921131f goosebumps rose 3d8a7bdb6d on the 63347f2a75 back of d177e92b18 my neck. I didn’t know why, 1fa4bc001b but it was a 62000e8489 bit scary.a337f8cc6e905118

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    “See you tomorrow.”1a2908ed72fc4b79

    But Elliot and I parted like adults, like businesspeople, shaking hands. Shaking hands! With a D&N executive, no less.d9134ae19ee01144

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    I decided to 0973ba85ab give up jogging 461afd3f86 and return to 06f4ef29cd my room. I couldn’t 708ef41b78 believe it, c2eff27ae6 and I a2f29c3802 felt like bdf68ef2f3 I needed 22820043bb to lie c8ad9cae47 down and c2a388272e punch a a62fd3d5a6 pillow.7fd2740a3b8189fe

    I wanted to 439d97fd8d share this incredible 37b27507d1 news with Cain e7076ce4b8 right away.e65740e34eba4c43

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    ‘I talked to a D&N executive! This is who I am!’75512cee8c37a16e

    Even if he 9eb34fe4ae saw me as 7c7340a871 a prostitute, I 38ea4e58d0 wanted to show e1b6bfa548 him that a be0cadf8cf famous record company 1563f5aaea needed me.56f1e9e38b6f741b

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    Maybe then 42820a4d38 his attitude a75bd6da64 towards me 8615a3a7a1 would change, 154dae1ac0 even just 685e2ce26d a little. It was c16455af9e a silly 9d93f171cf and pathetic 23e207b790 thought.d68a54b9bd8fea81

    I wanted 2dcb8c0304 to walk 1d2cf4b43b confidently, but ae530eebaa my legs e92d99b9e7 kept trembling. Like a 067e9ab762 broken dancer, 7fcd64c2b6 I walked 51bffcbed7 and ran de9e37dad9 into Hayley 824de91cb0 again.3994e3f1730f9323

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    “Detective, what’s 49e96a4b78 with your 66d121b099 look?”811f646d9fe0915a

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