Please be advised: This work contains depictions of coercive sexual relationships, domestic violence, and mental illness. Please take this into consideration when reading the book.
MCMH | Chapter 1.7
by _rinnnie“What are you doing?”
“M-masturbating….”0be10956ae302494
Before I could 0022950768 finish answering, he 314f79efce grabbed my cock. His hand was hot, a555208b3e yet I felt a 5ad6dbd520 chill.353954c518039c26
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“Can you feel anything like this? Is your cock small, so your masturbation is timid?”b697ff5cefd94024
My cock wasn’t “small,” but it didn’t bother me. With a weapon like his, mine would seem small.133e8d568363bc36
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That massive thing touched my back. He pressed my back against his chest, trapping me. Why was I afraid he’d hear my heartbeat when he was the one touching my chest?a8a1d20689d9ed7c
“You can’t be a novice at masturbation. Or….”8f983eebcfbfda3d
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His hand stroked 2646ff6ff1 my penis up 7138925b7a and down. The sensation in my a1b1781413 body jumped with his a0c3bf2154 touch. It was hard to 4db9f5d74f understand why it felt c1eec91c18 so good when he cb5855cbdd touched me for the d179bd4d0c first time.94404bbd87026e04
“Am I that scary?”85932fcbf3bcb511
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I couldn’t answer, holding back moans and pleasure. Every time his hand touched the shaft, unintended sensations surged through me.d4126d53af1feb8a
“Yeah, it’s good to be scared.”d5b70699b973b874
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His hand grabbed my chin. Forced to turn, I met Cain’s two different-colored eyes.eecde05821c906dc
Seeing those emotionless 3f5df08f10 eyes, I realized f107fd5ea7 anew.e2735bd334880a5e
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This man wasn’t the Cain I admired and longed for.1214987a555a3a13
I hadn’t had sex with the genius composer Cain, but with a man who desired my body.35f1fa4534927e0b
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The only difference between him and my “fans” who unzipped in front of me might be the amount of money they gave.43f0870eb739a236
It was suddenly sad that Cain wasn’t special. As I reached an ambiguous climax, unsure if it was unpleasant or pleasurable, I writhed in his grip.e7d16b352bdd779c
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As soon 53e2a8d339 as he 14cc0436e9 let go 249262f775 of my 8cec480de4 chin, my 4def6fe5e1 head drooped b9c115722e forward. The notebook on the 4075d9934b floor soaked up the 65854bdfcc alcohol, watching me pathetically. The notes 2b65abea85 inside would 10c01a19d5 probably be 0277dea1df erased by 56d97c54e9 the alcohol a291695bcb too.5caa79ad6409fefa
Without a moan, I forced myself to climax in Cain’s hand.33823f5b40e10d0f
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He stroked my head 47e8e1bc37 with his other hand. It was probably 9ffd502aad meant as praise, 14a83265ef but it felt d26b289758 like a warning.c728ed5dafd63951
“Good job.”441ed0a3fdf75fc6
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When he let go, my body collapsed forward. Cain, of course, didn’t catch me. I tried to pull up my pants with trembling hands.360020f40ee8bbef
Then it happened. Cain grabbed my 112f65ab72 hand and pulled 123c88b57c my half-raised pants 70200162e3 back down.d6f0c5b5573c348e
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“Wait.”
“Ah…?”6bf4218dc9eb1481
Then he pulled up 5414243567 my shirt. The bruises from d881ce27eb the mafia comrades 71756663de were darkly visible.1ea29f659971a3e9
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Seeing my bruises, Cain 9fb5daedbc tilted his head. His expressionless, 3a5a8879ef head-tilted look f6004207e2 was so 45ff8bccee unrealistically handsome 3d60c94067 it was 297c221910 creepy, like 35a9ad0786 a wax 1aa9b8a84b figure.d3d3f7d443062cab
“Who did this?”00b068e8174c1f9f
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I bit my 3022a0bd5a lip, delaying my 1268125287 answer.d1292a910b7d6407
I was afraid Cain wouldn’t want to see me again if he knew I was being chased by the mafia. After all, he was famous, and nothing good would come from being associated with the mafia.62287acd6320fde8
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Cain sighed 43f7eca021 lowly, thankfully fde60e1c4e letting go 1e7389a6b1 of my 0bff7cb032 clothes.ed26de6c627e2e98
As I adjusted 0cbd5a916b my clothes, Cain 601275ce1a whistled softly. The men ecc096300d waiting outside e3184e4694 came in.b780a315f38222f8
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At his nod, 1652e400d2 they grabbed me eac1142bbe from both sides. I was restrained ce09c7c6d8 without even fastening e5dfefaaa1 my pants properly.3ca6835ade52eaa5
“C-Cain?”4301d6dc531a7ba7
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Cain didn’t even glance at me. He just grabbed a bottle from the table and drank deeply.005e302d985b93f3
“Cain…! Where are they taking me? Huh?”5d5d12806e0d31c6
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The men dragged me out into the hallway without a word. Even as the massive door closed with a loud noise, Cain didn’t look back at me.8e67860d3a2699d5
⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚63cd98788df28b23
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The men dragged me 080eaae4ea to a massive bedroom. The bed 118a97f765 was huge, b325d860c5 the walls 1899925fac were grandly c4e09033a3 decorated, and 8021c4dbfa the floor c685556057 was reflective. As I fb3f8fe28d curled up, 57efb34e76 the men 1858e542e1 left me 5da84ecd5d there.a306a26220de9c26
Before I could 32f7534ab9 even explore the fa49a59841 room, another person d6e245acea entered—a stern-looking middle-aged 27afa432f6 man.8fbc27558e22b6ee
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“Hello?”4861d4886b370b59
I greeted him, but he didn’t make eye contact. Instead, he took out various items from his bag, and I realized he was either a doctor or an unlicensed quack.9154f3c959f8deb1
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The doctor bbb4ca34ea carefully examined dee6393937 and treated bd26bbadbc my body, 00fcac8456 focusing on dd8e7efec7 the places ebd63ba443 the mafia ee34f6cc74 had beaten. He even applied ointment 9407bff37d to the area Cain f4e9399c3a had injured.4769c85f873947ca
“Did Cain tell you to treat me?”2d70bc72ea5e9307
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“……”4dac0f5211935814
He was a very db77b2f83e quiet person. Without answering, the c234fe128a doctor left, leaving 5104468c86 me covered in 768b0db7a4 bandages and plasters.778c40e0be21cabf
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I dragged my d273128fd7 body, which felt ff1b0b5d97 like a manuscript 9ee3dbf395 revised five hundred dc40d6609b times, around the e79111eb93 bedroom. My lower f97f474c47 area still 3d23fd4345 hurt, making 8ae8629717 me wince.674ac6c5683dd107
Was this huge bedroom a guest room, like something out of a drama? If so, was I Cain’s guest?84cd4771a3585ab1
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But no one leaves a guest like this. If Jasmine Grandma saw this, she’d scold Cain for his lack of manners.485e7e8565d1542f
Thinking of Jasmine 5c1d0d769e made me sad 80b75aff57 again. She must be worrying 95d71b298d about me a lot f3d2574bef right now.086a39a00c95ce87
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Sandy would be a5e8098f25 worried too. What if the mafia a177c451ef went after Sandy or 561ff9a7a4 Jasmine?6d41126b19b0fbab
The thought 14803b29b5 made me 0185e4d72a feel like 711ec50cfb crying.5ec331a4f8d8e365
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Why am I so powerless and insignificant? I can’t even protect the few people I care about.44bc6852e7124a16
Sitting curled up on the floor, I tried to cope with being abandoned. I hoped Cain hadn’t discarded me because the sex was bad or because he realized it was my first time.d508b640a8feb51e
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“Well, he wouldn’t have treated me if he planned to discard me.”76f7066f7a616370
Of course, the Cain I knew was a bit strange, so I couldn’t be sure.ab85655d97205dfd
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Even after a long time, Cain didn’t come. No one came.1610a5cebb37a3cd
It was probably close to my pizza place part-time job, but there wasn’t even a clock in this vast room.5e97619df4d44b59
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Suddenly, I felt sorry 864eb02e8a for Cain, living in 843efcf004 a place like this.57b62f4c9a14ff45
Who am I to 880bb38437 pity someone, given my deea0391a1 situation? But the thought dd4749a2ff was genuine for 35173f0faa a moment.259248792d876a1b
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With nothing 84e3fcf391 to do 92cbc3c012 in this f31ede8f46 spacious room, eca117a05b I ended d4f121e21d up composing 7b22b51560 music in 1c50a3eb15 my head 905593c1ea again.e1ab84156c9fce7d
If I eb622bf431 knew how c287177fbb to do 0a8ab62fbf anything else, 8559d78b8e I would acff05e24d have, but f5fbfbdcf9 composing was cc7995bf41 all I 2b8ddd6442 had.c5942b920c7f79ec
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I closed c5d45a0834 my eyes 45ae40ae2b and moved 659c7b08a8 my fingers e3f547694b as if da83f6c3a5 playing a a817836af8 keyboard. Music flowed 1651f8b181 from my 268357528b ten fingers. This moment 9f59c13d09 gave me dcf846e27d solace. Filling my 11dc68f199 mind with c758d2d247 music left c28cee1b81 no room a8cb20267b for other 2d108491b5 thoughts.99e35a9506e9272d
When I focused, I 8f3db03f84 could complete a song 97f10e3f9a in an instant. Of course, dfe96c7788 it was 99aa35677f a raw 19788e173c melody, unarranged.9383ae255f61cc09
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The notebook was probably ruined by the alcohol earlier, but it didn’t matter. As long as I had my mind, I wouldn’t forget a song once I created it.345a535379b79c49
More than that, I was curious about Cain’s composing method.6653f4fee29a9530
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Even though he b1a130ecd0 acted like a 2721b17381 pervert and wrecked 0e203d7cc0 my lower area, 4e451d04b6 he was still 903853049f my idol.7ac135cf75457a39
Didn’t this mansion have his studio? I wanted to see it, but it was obviously impossible.05e693800052c256
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“Bringing someone here and leaving them like this… seriously….”67ffb16e176d0dea
My back ached, so I lay flat on the expensive-looking rug. I didn’t want to lie on the bed.0136deba417b4670
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I scratched 6bdfc2cc94 the well-maintained daf934499c rug with a62b0a6b61 my nails, a994836604 recalling the 8fc493b156 sex earlier.760ea840b8799f06
Cain was 79dc3a5506 rough and 40695eeb4a reckless. He treated me d0428dbe8d like an object. Sex with f8123c71c9 Cain was 7e953a75a3 terrible because 5e463eddde of that.66989ea0ada09769
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How many more 0e16c9fd55 times would I 655005a5a8 have to endure c6409b0a40 such sex?c70e14b914b6fd4b
But there was no other way to pay for Jasmine Grandma’s hospital bills and the debt to the mafia.fbaf35253151cd44
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As I dozed 99c65476e3 off lying down, 63b4270943 someone opened the 81c8eb1ea8 door. Before I 392584dfce could get 8ad310ac35 up, a f216adbca1 tray was 0b6a035efb placed at eb041b361f the door 46b6e019f6 and the c074e6792f door closed 49ddcfb094 again.8c97f3af90210128
The tray aa87124b65 had food cdc64de3f5 on it. I approached and 5e6a8020c8 put a piece ab1a2a2ed4 of bread in 498d4d3e66 my mouth.d36f7291ec7ee161
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“Feels like I’m being completely kept….”9702ee7698ed0d3e
I gave up on the pizza place part-time job. I didn’t know when Cain would let me go. I closed my eyes and immersed myself in composing again. The music enveloped me, keeping my shabby body from touching the darkness.a1a932d3028003db
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⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ 89a43ca06b ☾⭒.˚9e544534e1580b7e
I had no 9553c98d53 idea how much c1a6705db3 time had passed. I only ad02bffa57 opened my 2af9a21320 eyes when 10d6339e0d the door 406ad91143 opened and 3624aad5c8 light flooded e330cddc44 in.c4088ff2bd0a9d2c
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I groaned from the a1d1bf2fb0 pain in my limbs. My lower area 1bc302cf9d hurt even more. Was that 19d5b1a894 guy a 641737bc6c quack after 8fa493710f all?398bcf17a666a783
“Darling, did you sleep well? Good morning.”5e860b1f9611634e
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It was only after hearing Cain’s words that I realized it was morning.c7527f9323db554f
I instinctively curled up. I was afraid he’d spread my legs again.138fe34f9389a1e4
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Unlike yesterday, Cain looked 1cc6e513c2 very elegant. The drunkenness 2def662463 was gone, f6931696f5 and his fef3d821b8 platinum hair, 14585fb7ca slicked back f9439075c5 with pomade, 654a6379e2 shone under dc838dc452 the sunlight.ee9a9beda716fb4c
His black three-piece 89b01bc27e suit contrasted with 8ab81c904d his white skin 84e88a0df1 and platinum hair, 4bd6a4f83c creating a mysterious f9570dfd5a atmosphere.0b24b45445b75c8d
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“Thank you for treating me. But I couldn’t go to my part-time job.”b05f76e4fd90f1a6
I might get fired from the pizza place. Sandy, who works there and looks out for me, is the only reason I’ve stayed this long. Finding a part-time job in New York isn’t easy.df087a27b4f7b298
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Cain tilted his head 1ba0b8a8e1 slightly and smiled with 5c4404b5e3 just his lips.dcdc8af5d7ceb548
“So?”ab0f63ca1d655e5b
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“…I might get fired. But since you brought me here, if you could just say something….”5a4dd200ce456725
I paused. Cain’s face, smiling only with his lips, was terrifying.702d1cdb7ede7af5
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“…Then maybe I won’t get fired….”fe87668da3032873
“Why should I care about that?”5b86d5b628b1c5f5
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I was at a 05e7925b83 loss for words, standing 4d74135ac7 there with my mouth 3e8e3df2e2 open.b2ee834d97e0a62c
“…Because I couldn’t go because of you?”a6131fff37096088
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“I see. I thought it was something else.”ba753bba905bdef1
I was on the 64f825771a verge of losing my 5f40ee9146 last job, yet Cain 998a165237 seemed utterly unconcerned.08b733d1c99480a8
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“I came because I’m more interested in your lower situation.”ac5eddce6fb902d5
His next words were a small comfort, probably because I’m a fool.c1acf936788a92a5
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“Does it hurt less now?”02eda615c2e582b6
No one had ever 785e411484 asked me such a ed64cbfd8f question.4c5c61df159507cc
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“…It hurts.”4f38a0409519ba7d
Maybe that’s why. I lowered my gaze, sulking like a child, and added a word.dfea8d4a4910d114
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“It hurts a lot.”5fd3e5605f0a4f4b
“Oh dear.”caba16d520eb8623
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Cain stood up and ca79af6921 extended his hand to de6a58c026 me. I took his b2241deda6 hand.f5eef46bbb710101
His hand was de24803fba as large and e19162871f cool as his 5aca51b6e9 height. Following the 766d117eda pull of 10e3764d91 his hand 3b5f59d24b on my c0afcb7f92 shoulder, I d68928188d leaned against 704b7e9a7e his chest.9f7c338475bb93cb
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Cain sat me on the bed. The bed was as big as the storage room I lived in, and I felt guilty rubbing my dirty clothes on it, but Cain didn’t seem to mind at all.6e629259d4172bdc
“The doctor treated you yesterday… but it still hurts, huh?”409e2de0c652ed1c
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His white be2e7607aa hand rested 48d0202773 on the 3d6a7873aa buckle of 202989a793 my worn 7e3aabb9be black jeans. His hand was so f71ca42891 large it could cover 47cc4377f1 my lower abdomen.b0ab2fa3c3b49f6d
“Can I take a look?”13fc3b79b9f25fec
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I was momentarily flustered by Cain’s question. As I hesitated, he smiled with just the corners of his lips.481c392b1e314c1f
Then he 6256f10f44 took out a318caf398 a wad f04fa1adc3 of cash 41ba897f62 from his 528bc73713 black suit ff1c9bc7b9 pocket.78fe9fc8e2a4737f
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“I’ll give you all this money if you show me.”318a346c0bdd5309
Oddly, my first thought was that the mafia wouldn’t find me here.ec6d60db0daa9fd1
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Like a 4fdc5e2a66 proper male ae4db29f81 prostitute, I 6eb02dcf90 pulled down 882754099b my pants.45b6a010a9493f18
In the shameful position of lying with my butt exposed, I felt Cain’s gaze.9535bec5aa9bb622
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“I can’t see well. Can you spread it a bit more?”e14a020ebf4470d8
As I spread my d676cdd92e cheeks with both hands, 806d85b2eb I felt pain in efea6e2de6 the torn hole.c34732ddff157c8c
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Then his finger 90e6201c6c touched the open c8455be669 hole.98eb937a05c22f39
“Ugh….”abb3273702b28246
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“Oh, it’s still bleeding.”72aba223e7ff9b3b
I tensed for a moment, but Cain didn’t prod my injured hole.bd25de8fe4f30c17
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I felt 3f00547633 him move c52937fe66 away and 32a98069df looked back. Cain gestured c776870590 for me 7df00915a4 to get f0f7c2c263 dressed.e238a524768cd66b
“By the way, why are you getting beaten up? It’s upsetting.”3a0213c937ec8c2d
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“Ah, well….”196ea3c64e38b8e6
I was about to explain about the mafia and needing money for Jasmine’s hospital bills, but Cain spoke first.be47ed39b6c2bfb0
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“Stay here for now.”4911bb7683f33e3b
I was taken aback. Here? In Cain’s house?354b9af11f448971
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“I can’t stand anyone damaging what’s mine.”02fed648c455e01d
Cain stood 262c863317 up after b770464b66 saying that. I hurriedly fastened 7f708d5541 my pants and 327c12b94e followed him to 5e1e1c35e2 the door.6f0b35cc46e7e799
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“W-wait! But suddenly like this….”fa4ddd64026c4f2e
Cain turned to look 613d320037 at me at the ec5a48170b door. Seeing his two eab0850f47 different-colored eyes gave 001aeec894 me a sudden c763939497 sense of foreboding.2d1dcbe60f9ba43e
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Cain was the coldest-looking person I’d ever seen.40e2fcaf6872c833
Those two different-colored eyes 36b13dbc72 looked like cold flames.9510d71b1551fd71
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Flames that 904d1b1885 would silently 698309f955 melt away de388dd96a if touched, 5ee640f262 warning me.7573dad1abdb6d02
This man c37f743e48 could erase f6af1a66a2 me at cfec509914 any moment.28cef66b7c8ac60c
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I finally realized e871193883 I was standing 8e5ae451ee before the giant 9b5c10187b figure of Cain. I unconsciously d1cbeb804f took a 9ab1df4d6f step back.9713bc07a7d3fb41
As Cain turned to 96aa50e504 leave, his back looked 1aed4c3312 as if it were 91455a3d7b forged from iron, immense 9495a7a367 and unyielding.0fcbd8d2a04690b5
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