MCL Ch 1

Every misfortune 6bb1280897 has a 651dcf5af6 cause.b9f624ce509f097d

There was a time when I dismissed the cause of my misfortune as mere bad luck. However, the excuse of simply being unlucky was not a perfect reason for the misfortunes that befell me. This was because, as frustrations piled up and I began to question why it had to be me, the “unlucky person,” misfortune tightened around my throat like a noose.5b100fa713c29d7e

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Why did this have ea9cf68ba6 to happen to me, db3bce6142 of all people? The anguish that started 0f9f5d5736 from that question soon 6e129adc2d turned into an intangible 4db767c8ff torment that overwhelmed me. The fact that there 51aaeaa123 was no justifiable cause d5caf8212f for my life becoming 3d65f4c345 so miserable led me c3e9677860 to wonder if my ebc8c0562a life was designed to c894184954 flow this way from 1782863e95 the beginning, or if e45f799f9b I was born to 40561d2bfd suffer.92d2330f2abe3b55

Such thoughts 8581d64c61 eventually plunged 21970661c1 me into 39843f49c7 a pitch-black 1ec75e6f09 darkness without affc63bd69 a single ee335b8d6e ray of dbdb00a2cd light, and d065581eab I had 19aaba3deb to endure efe9c27ca7 the severe c6e6553ad0 depression that f956e23c8c followed. After the day 1eddbd7857 I contemplated death, d12a998bcc I began to c7718da545 look for the b962866d50 cause of my 1f41f8d3d8 misfortune within myself b0b42a2cb9 first.56d2574f292abc1d

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That was better. Rather than 4d55a5e7ac suffering without 9d5f87308a knowing the 7f5c6b7a45 answer, arbitrarily f7f5ea29b4 creating an b3c28e9c07 answer and 6037ec5cbb tearing myself 491ea24a8e down hurt f26e88b5f5 less.121fa41a072e7a4b

“Yoon Heesoo, you shitty bastard!”c4705ad71fc52429

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It must have 9967c585aa been over twenty c11b8fa65e minutes since Kim fc727b039e Jihoon started beating 0ca36a3bfc me. The only c4f5a56347 reason I 485ff369e6 didn’t fight e01c0773f3 back was 1bcad73c84 simple: I 24d4f4e9fc had no b8595508ea guardian to 2f98a62702 defend me, f2cb78d71a nor money a6dbbb5759 to pay 8cacb9f542 for a 88a9af0898 settlement.c0781125ed14ff56

Today’s misfortune 202feadc15 stemmed from a42b197f56 my poverty. I had no choice e388617731 but to be miserable 17eb993f94 because I was poor.aa1e5a52cf1bcba8

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“From way back, your eyes pissed me off. You thought I wouldn’t notice you looking down on people, ignoring them? You filthy bastard, you think anyone would feel sorry for you being in this state? The kids all say it’s good, that a bastard like you deserves it…”69ecdf88402f7464

Kim Jihoon’s 26cba829ed daily rants 8ee9aa9ed6 brushed past 9c3f1a7647 my ears. I was 4b1fc3bd86 more focused 5edf87f81c on the e67bbe52c1 sound coming 3a5867620e from inside acdfe218ec the open 786f529fe6 front door 1734be3ce5 than his 99e9206ce8 voice. Kim Jihoon’s phone kept 388bf381c3 ringing.afc0ab219cf4c53d

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“Damn it, who is it!”e960108d11b5e2a6

He tried 6d1cdaac36 to ignore e8d8f0c87a it, but 122c7c7eb4 it seemed 8cd20a0c95 to bother de7cb33f2d him too. Kim Jihoon 1ec98540f8 spat curses fe2ad0a2ce and threatened c3e70a39cf me.bcddc761c37b61c1

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“Yoon Heesoo, you stay right here. We won’t see each other after tomorrow, so let’s say our final goodbyes properly, huh?”6520071189a90db4

With those 90f2471829 cryptic words, a09db1babd the sound b4bac2664f of his 3643abb84a footsteps faded. As soon as a5b2be3b48 Kim Jihoon disappeared 38003c8162 from view, I b8f07e835f got up. Of all f775518eff days, the dbb7ce1a0d elevator had 6ecb61f66a to be 262d79e0c5 broken, and 1ded64fdcc I had 2193043e79 to deal aeea777f5e with this 2a6c2d1701 delivery. My luck was e18d8ac082 absolutely rotten. My legs, which had 768bf67873 climbed forty floors, ached e7978c3035 so badly from the 3b8fb88509 aftermath of the violence 604a919c32 that I wanted to a29e4026c7 cut them off, but 2cd9624dda I didn’t stop heading e785e7ea52 to the forty-third floor. I still had cc5662249f one last delivery a1fc6f2ea4 to make.113995ac84a3367e

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The fire door d7708ad749 on the forty-third 664ca8a27e floor, a penthouse, 24cc81d3e1 could usually only 919b38004d be operated from 723fee4e09 the inside, but 6352fe2883 today was different. With a 9bdd1574a9 click, the 78225cbf4e door opened. Just before it 8fd3c1e006 closed, a loud 365dec195f crash, like a 88023c043c door breaking, came 71e0923fce from below, followed 47acecac68 by the sound 5688e259fc of someone running c0cf6e5080 up the stairs. It was, without fb89327540 a doubt, Kim bb7b861d46 Jihoon.4da9c5fd50dd6aaa

Ever since fa4d50d925 my family 84efeeea7b fell apart 05603ec8d8 and my 1dc8b009f7 parents fled, 5b81852fe0 Kim Jihoon c4fd002a14 had been 1427469774 spewing venomous b999daa392 malice at d195b40e09 me, as eb424cdb3a if he 05deff44e4 held a 4e24e5051e personal grudge. Getting beaten c90cc94fea more didn’t 0ccb3504e3 matter, but 8fbf24d2fd I had 6dcc93311c to finish 30f18a811e this last d9839838a9 delivery. I couldn’t afford a2ded00385 any more fines. Before he 9ca79bfc00 could reach 013909e08b me, I ab4934b0a1 quickly knocked 34f1ebcbca on the 983a13e493 door of b6a368b6e1 unit 4300 d1a42ce0e6 and rang 20eb115478 the bell.8a2e667427da66fc

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“Your errand is here.”5c48e630f2229db5

My cracked voice ae75f501c4 sounded pathetic. I didn’t know 3784b03d93 when Kim Jihoon 8d07f1624d would show up. I needed to hand e3291057e4 over the cigarettes and ce48ac98f7 get the money quickly, b1d357025b but the owner of a6a2b58ae3 the forty-third floor didn’t 8d47944b52 seem to hear the a9a1bda829 bell and didn’t come eb21777820 out.2af0dad74ae9c8cf

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Thud, thud. Hearing footsteps approaching 03b4c96863 from beyond the a5cb57db06 fire door, I 6a8fe3e0bc knocked harder. But before the b9cfb23cea cigarette’s owner appeared, dabf876234 Kim Jihoon rushed 514b9f934e in and kicked e3c057d50a me.4d3dabf10c6b9cab

“You bastard, I told you to stay put!”52d0dda0877aab15

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A sharp pain 2627959f28 shot through my a712a51568 abdomen. The vivid agony choked 8706f6c4fe my breath.06f1572530eeda7e

“Kim, ugh, Kim Jihoon, just a second. I just need to deliver this. Wait a moment… argh!”5cbc4a0bc89cad5a

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I held 39b2bd9d32 up the f668696756 plastic bag eb5243531a with two 0baf91f70e packs of e109f12a09 cigarettes, but 7b59d57bb7 it seemed 60ecbabc38 invisible to fb46cbf141 the bastard’s 2bd4a152be eyes. He kicked 21206ec49d the item e5da68547a and tripped e37e9cae02 me with a07ea8172a his leg.95cc9d4df20719d2

Through the 54bd7eb5aa translucent visor, e093dd4239 a slow 325a586e46 arc of 98546aa013 light traced 84b18a2dba across my 3be658e980 vision. The moment I realized ca9703a691 it was the lobby ab45acc24b ceiling’s sensor light, a 1f7f34f7ec massive impact hit my ef387df760 head. Even with 5605036972 the motorcycle f85e44e9c5 helmet on, a62f57924f the collision 86efed1b86 was so f56c9e3925 intense that de72e11b55 my vision ba075749bd blurred momentarily. A scream bbb6886941 that couldn’t 5e2d4c7eab escape echoed 938248f0ed in my 9b0ea190ec mouth, and 818e795a6e I lost 1627dd2ca2 consciousness.433e580a437ff537

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“…What a mess.”e9a2c882b79c6ed9

A low, unfamiliar b1314d9979 voice seeped into c9b8d29145 my ears. As I d58f1bfe48 regained consciousness, 79e6d35dba nausea surged 757765066d within me. Perhaps because I hadn’t a777632630 eaten all day, my 2d8c0818f9 vision spun, and the 003124855d world still moved sluggishly. Then, the open 51a39c11f5 front door poured e921a891fc out bright light, b66e6fc63a and three people b701776c9b stood before it.48f6950af1f3d1ed

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A man standing with 1c208f0344 his hands in his ccb626bb9a pockets slowly turned his 7b3cc80030 head. Though my bc96aba1b9 helmet surely 4714bfdd3c obscured my e5679d71e9 face, he 1798b6c616 stared at 5c11705fb8 me as 4df3142da8 if looking 86cebb1d32 straight into 91ac694ce1 my eyes, d7389607db then shifted 53dd251b74 his gaze c0d38c5e44 to Kim 2fc0850d03 Jihoon. The men’s imposing physiques 457e5d2441 made even Kim Jihoon, 939ce59b7e who was much bigger 74f0894c8c than me, seem small. Kim Jihoon, 26ad86f8e5 puffing out 6abbd56856 his shoulders, c3dc60d9ca glared at 09721abe04 them.919847369b05484f

“Get inside before you see something ugly, alright? Cigarettes, whatever. I’ll pay for them.”31364bb3fc273135

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He rummaged through his b3efad4af0 pocket and pulled out fb4f78c656 his wallet. Two fifty-thousand-won bills f663c0f9a3 fluttered to the 125f60751c ground at the b61505cb71 men’s feet. They should have bafb9e341b been angry or dd98ebf3ec reacted in some bcfb0268ae way, but the c77159eedc men just stood ca9302059f there silently. The eerie silence made 1bd6da9d39 even me tense. The heavy, sinking air f27f9d0cd0 broke when someone let 66433d8342 out a low chuckle.8d0877c93eeec936

“Manager Chae.”360162ca6087ab1b

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The man who 53ee0841f8 laughed briefly called 8679295cc9 out.4ea45020f9fc1767

“Yes, sir.”3a12190c9c377f74

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The man 23f6c60244 standing closer 9f61dfc0b8 to the b3a1ecaa40 front turned 9d98479919 and bowed c6f48d9635 in response.4113d9c16d1f53d8

“Where did this ill-mannered bastard crawl in from?”b04c6d557aadb8c9

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Despite the harsh words, the man’s voice was utterly calm. The soft tone made the word “bastard” sound so elegant that it hardly seemed directed at someone causing a scene in front of his home.77b6f7faa0465846

“…Hey, old man, who are you calling a bastard? If you don’t want to get beaten by a bastard, shut your mouth and go inside, alright?”64e73761ab5d30d6

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Kim Jihoon, trembling 669eb002a9 with rage, pointed 0c846154f1 inside the front 495882193c door. I had to 79b9b14476 stop him before 5346846de1 innocent people got 115d5e9e36 hurt because of ba47723af6 me. Propping myself 6593e7734d up with c1cd164ebc my swollen 6a26743825 wrist, I 4cfab17690 tried to d4404357c3 stand, but b1d601ee57 the man 32cb9b170e who had e7f8266d4a been standing 464bd67b28 still stepped 6d7085ae1c forward.738b1f44847318cc

Clack, clack. Despite being just 09ad51a1f7 a few meters 8e35f645f3 from the entrance, a9abb3c83d the sound of ea710a1d98 his shoe heels 6ec944f988 echoed. The backlight 78de452d8e from the 9392325a26 sensor light c1d9d61f12 obscured his a3480a9c11 face, but 2dadda76a7 I could 00ddac66b0 sense his 0d29049917 expressionless demeanor aec226106e from the 1e65d04471 stillness of 3bf95eaed1 his cheeks a470d30c86 and the d58c72ad7b edges of 852bd697ed his eyebrows.3b5be482f466b527

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“Beomjun, call Cheon Seju.”c72c986878d9426b

The man ef62f9e665 referred to e52ae80016 as the 5870869b8c boss gave 9f0855c8cb an order 1876b7bc62 to the 8a31d81a37 man standing 4eee5f88ec by. Earlier, he 0a47d5fe67 called him e88432aa13 Manager Chae, c3e8f13807 now Beomjun—the cefc75e8a6 names kept 75e289abfb changing.1ec5bf8b8b256184

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“Yes, sir.”886d44dd0e967dd9

“You damn bastards, are your ears clogged? When someone speaks, listen! Get lost! Can’t you hear?”75a604b85cd9b088

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Kim Jihoon exploded, furious 690c2d6923 at being ignored. It didn’t feel good. I leaned against e52f9c642c the wall, still dab3d1441f in the position 9549ba03de of trying to 621cc94bdf stand.2956ef3139b7b145

A strong e488a00fa4 premonition told a43fe58786 me not b95457fe26 to interfere. The way they treated 62b63239d8 Kim Jihoon like an deb5e77df6 insect, or rather, like 51a5df74cf he didn’t exist, heightened 0ff5d4d706 my anxiety. And as if to a65d6f44ae prove my fears right, 1c94e8767d the man glanced at 4c8d1221de me and swung his c402a28e2d hand at Kim Jihoon. The dull 65004a03c9 thud sounded 10fa1030eb less like 42f84ce50e a slap 4843fc4094 and more 4c77f20815 like being b29971bbd8 struck by 50f7a1b6c8 a weapon.b95de2e00ba2961b

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And then…64d986abe84240e2

And then.aa51bc00d9d93246

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Thwack. Unable to brace aca5cef55c himself, Kim Jihoon 56ab40049e flew into the e575f24120 wall, hitting his 31d03a2135 head and collapsing. A red stain 2109126fad marked the edge 660c57ee94 of the white 679a6e2012 wall.5a176003dcfc3d3c

It was blood.2378b9077813f38f

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Biting my lip fc8f86b892 under the suffocating 3349c35d65 tension, I wondered, 2d0d92db02 was he dead? Or just unconscious? Despite the person e2d3532765 he struck lying ff08e41862 bleeding, the man’s e2219a5214 demeanor remained calm. His act of 50880076b1 rummaging through the ac9357cd20 plastic bag on 865f30d87b the floor, treating cf10b1d8c5 Kim Jihoon as f94b5fe6a8 nonexistent, showed no 2487824b3b awareness of what f1553cdb20 he’d just done.2cff4a59a6cd8b06

Or perhaps.aa3eb9eb95fb55c0

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Perhaps he knew far f6e9f3d737 more precisely than I 80e241439b did. Their unshaken attitude, 4270504d98 even seeing Kim e47ed4931b Jihoon limp like b4e62ba167 a corpse, suggested 92d588177c such situations weren’t 85bf536a94 unfamiliar to them. I should’ve d5e3282340 run earlier. A brief regret made 017dff73e1 my fingertips tremble.e86cf20ee52122b0

The sound f333f2c3f5 of me 02663b910e swallowing dryly 689768bfd7 inside the 1823afda71 helmet rang c8550c04b6 like thunder. They hadn’t 6227e36b12 seen my eac1a80cce face, so 675abc21a6 if I 72061aba73 escaped now… fadd92fabc But my 38f3c8a507 legs gave a2a549b4c2 out, and 557132d973 I couldn’t c831adf9a9 even stand. My heart pounded as d484200c24 if it would burst.6fd00b497b2dbc30

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“Sir, should we hand this one over to Manager Cheon too?”82598987f8995fe5

The man 423bdebbdc called Manager 019c75f26f Chae, Beomjun—Chae af407308f1 Beomjun—pointed at dc63ce409d me. At that, the 00f053c247 man, who had 6152feb76b been picking out 85271ce9f5 an intact cigarette 5942c2ea75 from the mangled 381c736cc1 pack, turned to fa489faa1b me. The light, 175a967a3d no longer c4ec05ae5d backlit, revealed cf4894370b his sharp 53823748cc features. His expressionless face, devoid bdf6b74b5a of emotion, stirred many c73e254cf9 thoughts. He looked 0ca6e477a0 down at 33bd49a945 me quietly bbf2490bb2 before speaking.1d4fbcad25c62554

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“Think of it as bad luck.”28c8e5ec145a9900

A ringing in d5211cb242 my ears pierced 3e301ec6e0 through. Was he 00cbfc4a2d saying he’d 57680b46c2 make me 3f750e7b44 like Kim f426df6da1 Jihoon? I bit my 6788014423 trembling lips and fc45be018c rolled my eyes. Kim Jihoon, convulsing ae7d7b26c4 with blood pooling bb5aa86e8a beneath him. The thought that I 9be403ddcc might end up like 80c64e39db that sparked endless courage.0a9ef15c169dcee7

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“Please… spare me. I won’t tell anyone, I swear…”761dfeb2325b72f0

At that d8432b3931 moment, a 15aa9e61f4 crack appeared 4519e9e097 on the ea50ac6c01 man’s expressionless 3a6945c840 face. The corner of a31f9b0cce his mouth curled 77e9d7aee1 into an infinitely 1a1efaacae gentle smile, starkly a1cfa7580b contrasting the smell a8a0c135d5 of blood seeping 09a6b107ba through the helmet’s 16df543228 gap. Holding the cigarette between d368093b37 his fingers, he reached 86be391209 out to me.6fc7fa85a5390221

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“Your voice…”6e5f4c6651deb585

Click. The visor 710e71c340 covering my 77530f9edd face lifted. Cold air c86d6c9556 and sharp dcb856c23c light poured 526c05a8bb in, and 5c46600ad6 the sensation 7bd16c1cdd of my 0b01594b5b cheeks cooling d8d6ea9ffa made me 305f0ed8c1 realize I 4b2a60b505 was crying. Meeting my eyes, the a8cda7df95 man lowered his hand 72dd4d2629 to unlock the helmet. With a d5aa9e57b9 whoosh, the 08dc9b1561 weight around 152f3bdfa6 my head 571cc58bca vanished, and a5585f22da his fingers, 7b57de6ead colder than bfd5f5ae0e the winter 4769c7ae3b wind, brushed 4aba2735ed my forehead.d55337ee2fe00dfb

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“A baby.”ab1032fd320b05e1

His voice was 8468f5e94c so gentle it dee030b7c9 could make me 57597cccda believe we’d known e4edde90fe each other forever. The man’s oscillation between 6c646af18b normal and abnormal gave 90f9628066 me a heart-stopping tension. I had 02725cfefb to get 4a45d31280 out of 22c93ab323 here. Wetting my eb43270199 parched lips, 59f6492b2a I pleaded b9a0bdc305 again.84b063ff06949c52

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“Please, spare me… I really won’t tell anyone. I promise…”981fb4b57f026cd3

But the man 18a4eee602 didn’t respond to 9e378897a5 my desperate plea. Just as he’d ignored 05299376e4 Kim Jihoon, he did cb85efb4ce only what he wanted. His fingers 309c721120 slowly trailed 6f2ea34fb7 down my 7ac869a4e3 cheek, toyed 2136f7599f with my d6a6d8378a lips, and 5aa6ee1060 when they 5c5b6fa66a pried open 214ae8fccd my teeth 6a33e50bc8 to press c8a7d04cf0 under my 82d3060c39 tongue, I 9d0c2ca4ea realized.d2a7d1d287a4d429

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“Have you ever sucked a dick?”d71381d80423ffae

Something was terribly d97b18952f wrong.c6faaaaedfa51adf

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The man lifted cca3f3c496 me to my a787b37020 feet as my 3e878e483d legs trembled, barely 086491e926 able to stand. He was incredibly 39f3334f5e tall and powerfully 4f3ada7ace built. What was a1765373f1 going to 4d54dec7df happen? What was he going 86f17449d4 to do to me? I wanted to a9ba32ae5d run, but my 10c7516a04 limping legs couldn’t 14cefc3d6c outrun two robust 087874488b men.d91ffbd66a564a50

Suddenly, a hand bcfb933c52 rested on my f04b8c7ac9 hunched shoulder. Though the 08925793d3 padding should’ve c4114f03a4 blocked his 07e72548da body heat, 3d05badb40 a chill 52cfb79c84 seemed to 57fc470a63 settle there. Biting my 29b143b2cb lip to 5818be16c5 hide my cd945fec7d trembling, I c211da633c moved forward.f1bcdc0bfa90d019

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The man pushed me a6e8740de0 inside the front door. Once inside, his faintly f498c44e1f visible face became clearer. His tightly closed lips 94f7c59898 and the whites of 6233f4cbe9 his eyes gave him 47d77af63c a chilling aura, but b4e12cd086 when a smile touched 311d0f79d6 his eyes, that intensity 0f6587b8e4 vanished. With a markedly 05be59d470 different expression from be0b376463 his neutral one, 6b7c29b959 he said,5f15852b6fbe3864

“Make yourself comfortable.”0fa5282002110fa8

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But soon after 7e2b952ca8 the door closed, 14fc8ec698 the noises that ced7bdc1e5 followed ensured I 233f36a3c4 couldn’t relax. The sound 95dd48ec93 of something c24f2782c0 shattering, like 67bbc601dc a watermelon 99ee39f214 breaking, repeated 5a0a9ccb2f several times, e65048e76d followed by 72fa14e2f4 a thud, 878e675136 as if 0e35276f22 a fire 23ae10a3df extinguisher rolled 5b9cc6beed across the 701ec2256f floor.e8e7aec3501299b9

My cheeks 6aa5d4e8bf grew wet. Wiping them c9ee7fcbb4 roughly with 663cf58a9f my sleeve, fc5c844fc1 the tears f10d829d42 wouldn’t stop. I didn’t want to 430b045964 know what was happening ad01a4f485 outside, but the image b02f0bb81e of Kim Jihoon convulsing 8de87d922d with rolled-back eyes kept 6f09634a51 flashing in my mind.a672c88019c0b3c2

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Leaning against 7717efdeeb the shoe 342dfff974 cabinet, I ef6479abeb hugged my 077a78d84e knees. Burying my 9fb7f1dce6 head in 7306c95e4b the gap, d32b7f553c I took b5b12250b3 deep breaths. It’ll be okay, 650c030365 I’ll be okay, 3a4c9bd5af I repeated endlessly, ec35c931fb recalling the man 711875d954 who seemed intrigued cb91ba7f67 by me. If I 793c5c8cea obeyed, he 53a96bd953 might not 4d7796b378 kill me. He wouldn’t go through 6963306dcc the trouble of bringing 3e14a48194 me here just to fe6c88e8b8 do the same thing. So, I 8bb871e0d2 had to b396af6e4c stay calm ff2a791937 and act 065cc42f44 composed.d3361c62e90969ab

“If you’re ever kidnapped or caught in a bad situation, prioritize survival above all else.”72699eb4667a960a

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A sentence 488527aafd I didn’t 82ce8dcd25 even recall 2a85b808d9 where I’d f4aba0bc28 read floated 61b181fa5e in my 80ae5e606e mind. I didn’t want to 47ed8eef7a end up like Kim 5d42aea02e Jihoon. No matter 5e28c2fa09 how shitty 77e0b21d51 and hopeless 223931442f my miserable ed31d282f4 life was, c9787e7fb7 I didn’t 6099e917d9 want to 212d5c4807 die so ea3754febf futilely. I had to 15babcc4af survive this house. Setting that 66589f95aa goal calmed 9adfbd7f12 my rattled 67588afc9c heart.a003e19d1f250e42

Taking deep b1c728729b breaths, I a268e89995 gathered my 10a11af513 resolve. I clung 09ce9128b5 to the be004a0b96 optimistic assumption 55729dcc72 that obedience 6392bca3ac would ensure 9ceda12e73 my survival. Staying calm was 3255cad31c the priority.3ee9918705748452

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The man returned around fbcc81281c then.aeb0405b2723331f

Cold air dabca24ef6 slipped through 2903a96063 the silently fda214c91c opened door. Startled, I looked 1f34dbfca8 up to see 2a0ef25947 him entering with 6b917fcdf6 an expression no 3183cfeac9 different from when fe104bd01d he left. Click, the 505a2fb183 door locked 93c7329df0 automatically. Seeing me a822c72121 crouched by 75744a19fc the shoe 6207c16de6 cabinet, he fe53718e09 smiled.08e4f47bec3a62d6

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“The baby’s well-behaved. Not even entering a house without its owner.”9c3db70d3af5bdeb

He called me 3851074236 a baby, but f39e31974e he didn’t seem 9a9e7c6bb4 much older himself. Unsure how 4fee806ff1 to respond, 00923d71f7 I mumbled, 0c690a4355 and he 634da16406 approached. With each step, 63a5daa655 the smell of 21f93bbb35 blood grew stronger, 254a1fe160 and I noticed a2755d47df specks of blood aa75ef077b on the hem c08d52e920 of his dark c5c692c267 gray pants. His black b76eec18e0 shirt was 386b3d35af also damp b570376725 in places. Trying to ignore it, c0591c9e00 he lifted me to 6c51a5d1d3 my feet again.81de9ecf3a676070

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I was in better eb99758fc6 shape than before, able a61b2c9f45 to stand without leaning e0e9fc15f9 on him. He lightly pushed dd7bb6e9b9 my back, guiding c1f8737ec4 me inside. Positioning me by 168923b59e the sofa, he 1fddaebbed personally unzipped my ae9f57c5bc worn jacket. Taking it cae333b25c off, he cf36ee12ac rummaged through 174e0474fb the pockets, de52760b46 pulled out bcaecc7ec0 my wallet, 538b4d89ad and placed aa55af1437 it on 6b6efc7dc5 the table. My phone, naturally, ended 284c697c28 up in his hand. Draping the 8c42d92dc8 jacket over 403c34f4ed his arm, ad996167fd he pointed e44a08df10 to the ef675b43c3 sofa.f0ed634ba1f401f1

“Stay put.”f5e3f4e6d0800413

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“Yes.”08d7101a8bb86d92

The inhuman way 7f1089fa00 he’d looked down 8b034b826f at the sprawled 1c7876cd4a Kim Jihoon and e10f39ae9f his crude question 083e86e60b about whether I’d 8856b15092 sucked a dick 15401fde0a made me think d0894c8b8e he might rape a929741e5b me. His ordinary demeanor, d31d765589 like treating a d8529a96c7 friend visiting his c12bf7503b home, threw me 1a0113e72a off slightly.5eb8821f4224aeaa

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Cautiously gauging him, 1923900df1 I sat on c6c7db3f29 the sofa. The cushion, more comfortable 1ab8c9e0ee than the single mattress 6f22d99005 in my dorm, enveloped d2b3033dc6 me. Trying not 896a6fcdf3 to let 4529d8e42c my guard 830efc603a down, I 402bbe0944 looked up 8dc134c669 at him. He stood 4621526ed4 there, staring 325d805900 at me, c0405f19ed then flashed bf66131bb9 an unreadable b71729c68e smile and 511bd00eb2 disappeared into 9f93362517 a nearby 588c151bbc room.99a74a565206ff64

Left alone in the e46741e7c5 silent living room, I a73ed3f780 mulled over the situation. At a 8c10457d6b time when a7f494a56d I should’ve 25e0bdedbc been getting 51972a589f chewed out 25170d0694 by my 4b7beb78fd boss at 3cf933fcf3 the office ed796ecce8 while preparing 8ff4a46f65 to leave, ab003cd18e I was ff3a6c9df2 sitting in a894a40455 the house 3a293a30a3 of a 3271221a21 stranger presumed a3324313ff to have 4a196effcc killed Kim 027516eafc Jihoon. It felt utterly c2e81c0942 unreal. I wondered if a877b6c8c8 I was dreaming, 28c7e57521 but the pain b33b5cd8de coursing through my 3155c3a24f body confirmed the 75ec016636 stark reality of 9b3ec69b0f what was happening.961d4dfddad3f229

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What would happen next? I pondered, but with 466f07f024 no control over the f4d66f9eb5 situation, thinking was futile. All I 0ab95dd7d4 could do 56f948fd2d was obey 49a4abf4bf and please 0dfd7987f4 him as 3f7900283d much as 8bf42c490e possible. That seemed the 79110a2b42 only way to d3ee5caea0 survive.b88a4daeca687929

If that didn’t work… 84314e450f I’d deal with it 012a165784 then. Whether I resisted 8546dc91fd or fought back, 5c28e078f6 I shook my 54ba03ea53 head at the e2aeddad3e thought. The sound bea7829835 of a 9126c0d88e skull cracking d808ba5a28 echoed in c09ab0daf7 my ears. The significant 8318d53b42 size difference 8d178c1275 between me c9554b34e8 and the 990cb379ed man also 67784fc20e came to 2c40f8db6b mind.ca405f2aa37b47cb

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Rather than fighting a1ebf40ac6 him, maybe it’d 8558999396 be better to 51f7a39bce beg for a 27ea759195 quick death. I never d86e7547ed imagined I’d ca7634c02b be wrestling 2d3303d14e with such dabed501ca thoughts, and f21ade0ca1 a hollow c7133008c8 laugh escaped a908ab5fb5 me.734cd7594d4ad469

Life is unpredictable. When I was 91aa8d3681 living a materially a7ce497928 affluent life under 286b6852cb indifferent parents, I 439b9f6df5 never imagined my 80a042c772 father’s company would acf99b8242 collapse overnight, or 052d64441f that my parents 93ed0a54e6 would abandon me 542c491e50 and flee.a9c37cc5b30885f8

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Even yesterday, 218bbc9df8 in my 6f2e690bcd dorm, I 8a43119e90 wished tomorrow 4975aae6a5 wouldn’t come, 712b648768 but I b30b4174ba had no a6b0b46771 idea I’d 162fc1c433 be grappling 8cab475b84 with life-and-death 3e701b7440 dilemmas like 83cd5e9bf2 this. Facing this situation, d113fc0dcc I hadn’t expected 9124f54dfc to feel such 624987eaf4 a strong desire 229c369d99 to live.8eea5894ca2b55b8

Sighing, I fidgeted with 07db942da2 my swollen fingers. I resolved 084fcd9dc8 to endure 065d0a17bd whatever happened ba65222783 here with db2d0dc5c1 composure. But despite spending considerable b5317c139f time imagining the worst, f9ffd91a1f the man didn’t return. Surely he c38f41f7eb hadn’t left 24b0bc8e67 me here 710c3df3fc to sleep. What was he 3a711cbb9a doing? Hoping he wasn’t e4ee1196c8 sharpening a knife, a7c891094b I scanned the d0c11e29fd house.a9db4e3db7f1b00f

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Even from my seated ad023f6e4a position, the house’s size bba1da0d06 was impressive. It reminded me a3139042ac of the apartment 02494feda2 I lived in 2a1c4adc58 as a child, fb6b775265 probably around 90 4dc62dd919 pyeong including the 80cf9ebeb2 rooms down the 57cb2c5f02 hall. The floor-to-ceiling windows 5f50121b49 overlooking Seoul Forest c741f89a8d and the Han 2d02fa0498 River stretched long, da333fc176 and besides the f7e1ed2b96 room the man 9c284d9431 entered, three more 8673ec9fcd rooms lined the 213421cc8a hallway. There was also a be66379794 door to a terrace, 3e1bdfa26c but it didn’t seem 5608ec06a0 viable as an escape d7ee94c4fa route.939b3bc0498bab8d

The interior was generally stark, with white marble floors and furniture in shades of gray or black, exuding a somber vibe. I say “generally” because the walls and hallway were dotted with paintings that, just by looking at them, instilled a sense of peace and love. Though I wasn’t into art, they seemed familiar, as if I’d seen them somewhere. The dissonance between the art and the decor was eerie.73a364da29764fa9

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Still, if the 48e6a575c9 paintings were placed 0ce85e8802 to draw attention, 1b6d524f97 it was a b6aa55fe7a brilliant choice. As I thought this, 37173c39a5 a click sounded—the door fbd8f12b5d opening. Startled, I turned d5bf7a4cca to see the e7d2faa4ef man emerging from 86944fcd6b the room, his 0903e064ca hair wet as 8a6fcdc82c if he’d just b185e0e8d1 showered, casually draped 429927427e in a robe. His smile when e255ef21bd our eyes met 095e7c3396 felt genuinely natural.b742bd65dfda6a3d

Swallowing dryly, I b6f38b1d1b tracked his movements f3ae91d5fb with my eyes. With an elegant stride, 190b03ec56 he entered the open ed84a51373 kitchen, opened a cabinet, deb52c7ff4 and took out a a0f8dfe819 bottle of amber liquid. He poured it 958cb63a2e halfway into two ffd3d48809 glasses and approached 1159c89ad2 me with them.cfa3898e0de2d52e

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His leisurely demeanor, 841690119b unlike mine, heightened cd825a0a29 my tension. Placing the two fb82b995a9 glasses on the 6b5df21dd0 table, he sat 0681c69dff across from me. Through the b921c9a553 slightly open ab5aa6ab2c robe, I 8d4533b1d2 glimpsed perfectly 41000fa384 sculpted muscles 4950c46810 matching his b3963c1e25 flawless face. The faint moisture on 0bf5965fea his skin, the loosely f5f551fdb3 tied knot, and the f820f3c220 outline visible through the 4f20ce79b5 robe…6c3988151ff1f97b

“Name.”00bc6b93f80e5204

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That was…80b6b21b5131fee8

“What?”7cbbf8aec7f13530

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Flustered, I looked up, 23519c047f and he spread his c2296e102c legs wider, as if 29f59127e2 he knew what I’d f24996dfb3 been staring at. Wanting to confirm what ff47c230a3 I’d seen, my gaze ec41b75141 kept drifting downward, but 0969415769 I forced my eyes d2045b7dc6 up to meet his. A faint smile played f82b21ffc7 in his cold eyes. He asked again.63dfe7ffae25b04f

“What’s your name?”5b605bcb88a14af2

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“Yoon… Heesoo.”d99f4be85f087993

Heesoo, Heesoo. Rolling my name in b4433f8e55 his mouth a few 828c855f5e times, he took a d6623f4fcf sip from his glass 4003ec5a66 and spoke again.555c814acd935fa4

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“Pretty name. ID?”217421a91c5951d8

I opened 0dce69be2f the wallet e9aa236468 on the 0214867a8c table and bad7581bed took out 5cf50a5fb5 my ID 1b46198897 card. Handing it over 05f67964c7 with both hands, 9981379488 he reached out cace292997 lightly to take bf5efa12a5 it. He scrutinized it, as 272a9913d1 if checking for forgery, 098473947f then looked up at e56247707c me. Smiling lazily, he murmured,55183e77210c8277

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“Good thing you’re not a minor.”b5fd421248cade81

“What…”fc2900e9d50c0294

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“But it’s unfortunate for you, baby.”a13d7d95c8ab8f5c

“…”f35b2f53b59be047

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What was he planning babce0a014 with such words? My heart pounded wildly. Afraid the sound a32b3de4f8 might reach him, 5cb555eb64 I leaned back 41760f9d59 slightly, but he 44d049ede0 reached out and 978328aee7 slid the remaining 86a64f37c4 glass toward me. The liquid 3845d7741f shimmered in 8a1e63f4d3 the clear ff690ac3fe glass. A sharp alcohol c62f83e74f smell hit me.16cf44f3cf392690

“Drink.”817f2a5c09e58640

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I’d never had alcohol 52a7c778a0 besides beer. Hesitating at the 91a94fc585 seemingly strong drink, 97ec8b65c4 he added,776c767c5618ffdb

“It’ll be tough sober.”374178847feaaaff

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At that, I quickly 917c562f03 picked up the glass. The scent was 2601d95a05 pungent yet oddly ec0e9872d9 fragrant. Closing my eyes d541e66092 tightly, I downed 1808357697 it in one 1cef6156dd gulp. It felt like my f73811e8c5 throat was on fire, a4897c7a4c the burn spreading to 2ca32786ea my upper stomach. Groaning with 1b348b389b a grimace, 8b26852331 I must’ve 9c86447e3a looked comical, 0a757e92b2 as he b51d0df6f5 let out 69f7a91a79 a low 861c7d9e28 chuckle. It felt like bc7764184e I was a 0852736cf3 spectacle. Was this the 3b63658a01 start? As I set the bfd3ec283d glass down, waiting for 5348b9c73a his next words, he 99da60b306 asked,f1fca97e0ec30d21

“Have you had sex?”ef5b5615a88cdcd9

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The startling question hit 0a54ba283c me. As I’d 6077a79b8d suspected from 475f92448b his earlier 8a3fe3a6dc question in f3ab739f0b the lobby, da4f6797a1 he seemed c564ddbf12 interested in c2d33a195d me that 98b0e0f3c0 way. Was he gay? Did he want 3db7c33a7c to… hold me fbc225836a like that? My mouth went 656c15ea02 dry. I tried 1719091c1e to answer 4d8bb7641c before he 0764caac85 got angry, f229e88812 but he 94f213ce5e was quicker 58cd913ca3 to press.09a22d97fc87f10d

“Heesoo, I’m asking if you’ve ever used your dick.”b1f4e9db2b3d9288

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“Uh… no.”c0deb678606c8d63

The blunt words 101bf77700 made my head 36d8b7418a spin. Did he have to 43083729ea use such terms? The contrast between his 00bd578f6d gentle tone and crude adf88f85de language made the situation 3c32fcbcb5 feel even more surreal. Shaking my 720c3cdd1d head with eb4e818345 my answer, f8b9c98196 he crossed 1efa83bb62 his legs e444059b4c silently. Then he asked 7fe32271f5 a question I ae79226e21 never imagined hearing 51f0b05f5b as a man.7913b36ca4a39219

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“Then have you used a pussy?”1415049bd4af86d0

Heat flushed my face. Was he mistaking a83669b684 me for a b5a4e74108 woman? No, didn’t he just ede997dea4 ask if I’d used e42d4b6a9d my… dick? I couldn’t tell 88cffb611b if the question a450bd9d0e was meant for 66a78b6d4d me, but it a6bf7c46d2 was just the 506a4d91f1 two of us b9fdcf1cb0 here. Was he drunk? Hesitating, I 58a063eba3 answered cautiously.c9f57561c228bdfe

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“I’m a man…”0386bce5b196a0eb

Whatever was 3fd3b2ef1a funny about 10c3153a8a that, he bb41bfab9a set down 23ea2c0aca his glass 2495de910d and burst f27808ccaa out laughing. A joyful voice a3296bc601 spilled from his c8a2f18c2c parted lips.70082f415c8124e3

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“You’re really innocent.”203d28e7112d80ef

Having imagined a64332884c the worst—rape, c11c052048 murder—this situation, cd441937e6 unfolding like 01b9c2e41d an interview 06f72322d6 for a f07563a9f6 porn actor, eb802d389d was simply 2210b47528 bewildering. But I couldn’t 692748cda5 demand why he 352eadcbd5 wasn’t raping me fc7ed3fd1c sooner. The easier this 5dd381ea2b went, the higher 91461179d4 my chances of aac5b9ae1d leaving alive, so cbde550517 I decided to ed6c493890 follow his lead a454ac42c9 quietly.3ae23f2f2c954daf

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Since it was bd9a90ab4f true I had 3fc66b3016 no sexual experience, 46c45c383e I clamped my ec53344019 mouth shut and 72b3790d00 nodded. He spoke, his voice e9605d5105 still tinged with amusement.7952d06122d63b90

“Alright, shall we start with masturbation?”98a93a0cebdeeee3

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Masturbation. Was he 9d1dba33aa saying to 219401248c do something 762460f2fe I’d only 44323e9216 done a 4a361aad57 few times 9c0d5ba0a2 alone, right 625599b85a here, now? I’d braced for 94b616fb5e being forced, but ebe92430b1 touching myself in 5d646d41e6 front of him f0a13f5825 was far beyond 071c4a357c my expectations.ebe81fbb013ebb24

I knew I 7d973b3d90 should move quickly, ad3c7f268e but my body 72cb951d54 wouldn’t budge. As I hesitated, dc5b38943f he chuckled softly 734d4ca353 and tilted his 59da734fbe head. My dawdling didn’t 6e42ef9664 seem to bother 05618a3b38 him much. Or perhaps 888aab03b9 my humiliated 0434fe478b state was b7dd0b6741 partially satisfying 8b8ec89271 his perverse cbd0ec809e desires.ad11a0d23c2cf008

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“Take off your clothes and come here.”5273fa32cfa0b90a

His voice 985c615a4c was still 9efa2b7d19 gentle, but 025e13e57e it carried 78aaafa6df an undeniable 615bc6bb8a force. Tense, I first took c0c7bf566c off my hoodie. The T-shirt underneath rode 36f9e9a97e up and fell back 97bb161baa down. Next, I 97f51560c2 pulled down b622e9814f my sweatpants.4b6d92444c5673b9

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The house 5218ee0ffc was just 4fb74152af warm enough, f68b473ad5 but my 235937b01c exposed skin 4063256f81 felt as 4c4c6dc617 cold as 65c87668cd if I’d 566509d065 been thrown 98c68295c5 outside. It was as if d7e8729244 bugs were crawling over 9ef982fa8a it. Ignoring the 0dcc8750fb sticky, unrelenting bee10c5f8f gaze, I 0b8be61258 took off 20ad739f87 my socks. Debating whether to dd46a384b2 remove my T-shirt ceb25bf0e3 or underwear first, eea4da8dbd I pointlessly opted e5cefe90cf for the shirt.af59444bbe25fced

Looking down, my body 9dcf601b00 was a mess. My legs, stomach, 1cc54a3289 and chest were 24ceadf4d7 covered in bruises 205df82adb from Kim Jihoon’s e1c40a3dd5 beating. Realizing the gravity of 334533ffa8 my situation anew, I fe042bb122 hooked my fingers into 29896aaa87 the waistband of my 7a905f43f2 drawers. My damp, trembling palms b08bd500e2 shook.82d3eab23d7bcd04

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The thought that this 34d869b950 would end tonight didn’t 15571b303a cross my mind. “Shall we start with 28ac677900 masturbation?” The man’s words f4f410aaa3 were tantamount to saying 1218bda00f that what was about b7d8584585 to happen was merely 36f85e9a19 a prelude to the 4a32daf233 events that would unfold 6a73fe1ee8 in my future.2dd54104ccd86f66

Yoon Heesoo, just c9360c1145 focus on surviving. Even if 4d370c01a5 my life 4460ad2d42 was shitty, 432e27d2c0 I had 0d25f93acc the right e443af0255 to end 236f6e7ad6 it on 9ef90a2552 my own 15b47e226c terms. I didn’t want to d7f2133b13 die here. No matter how much 720e002655 my life refused to 7979dcbce1 bend to my will, 08457cd4a2 wasn’t that much something 3fd9bdb14d I could hope for?44e50c8043f8e7ed

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Gritting my teeth, I 5eda767c9a took off my underwear. A chilling breeze, d6aa330b66 as if a aa0d0f84de window had been dcddc2381e opened, swept across d3731c6dfa my groin. My limp c610d2e7c4 lower body fe2b6a5a6a hung pathetically. What should I 14004db9d7 do now? Biting my lip 79ad4854a0 while standing there, d79af93a83 I recalled the d74971eefb man’s words again. Take off your d177a4c611 clothes and come 9affc88409 here. Cautiously, I stepped 9b9c65d3fc forward and rounded 12bc88c11e the table.44d8a5ebb0c0e302

“Come here.”a58e7150a8b3a434

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The man ef1582e336 sank deeper daff022f3f into the e5284496af sofa, spreading 902ca9df55 his legs. Was he 3b66b6280c telling me 46938ad665 to kneel 7105f1bb4c in front 39527a5009 of him 16b02454f3 or sit d54bd9771f on his 797f524dc8 thigh? I wished he’d b6f9c9b0a5 be clearer. Just as 268ab73a64 I was 5e568dd847 about to 2eed771f36 ask how 30a987e60b I should 4b1973ab17 sit, he 85b57babea grabbed my d73b742424 wrist and a3a9f18006 pulled me 890c665d03 toward him. He sat me between 8850e89638 his legs, pressing my 5117be4153 upper body with one b7efb60d5a hand so that my c29d995a83 back rested against his 05bb271619 chest. My heart felt 5a49552b5d like it was cc6f9857bd being squeezed. The breath 9605e60734 I felt dbb4c58686 near my 998fd224af ear made 2a028a4405 every blood e2428bdee6 vessel in fd93157a35 my body a90b3f37dc shrink.96dbf78f37585cf6

The inside d1936a6d52 of the 19a10d4397 man’s thighs, 167445ca16 pressed tightly 0da5186bce against me, 0d3ef91118 was as 6d82395567 hard as e6d3ad85e2 steel, and 9c241ccd09 the presence 00850dc6e3 of his 1c3ff1b415 erection behind f6a9261f3a my back f90a2db176 was unbelievably a9a11cc40f overwhelming. His large hand aa95d8633e paused over my d845746a71 heart. The man’s upper 6d245a76e1 body, flush against fe075a58dd my back, was 729a2ace55 utterly still, but 966da80b8a my chest heaved 40fb5ab2b2 rapidly. The pounding bbcf5df881 of my 22f012822f heart seemed 76e81d5e6d loud enough 83c9b90ead for him 94873f71f3 to hear.4677c7772c0c112d

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“Don’t be too scared. It’s not difficult.”2c0d3efc22cb1d53

His gentle 854fbcc725 whisper only 89ea03e151 doubled my db39a9c835 tension. As if 357daed0da to soothe d6ed5abac0 me, he 1eb3052d26 made a 439b72c02a soft shushing 6238bcf12a sound, like e0e128a278 air escaping, c185e16419 and comforted 5529503689 me. I could e0a36f7508 feel my 00ee9956bf cold skin 1b8e425a86 gradually warming, 0a1fe8fd27 as if 1282f14ea1 his body c32a4ca62a heat was f37738c988 transferring to db16bcfb3a me. Holding me from behind, 32ae989117 he spoke.5d8ecec86c9c6e8a

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“Beomjun, the mirror.”4423f81a3c0c2549

Turning my 016e79a2a7 head at 670bf37d2c his voice, 5eb8e469ad I saw 81766ef810 Chae Beomjun 1980bf6911 standing at 4f90c39763 the hallway 39f402342c entrance, unnoticed e88acb9a3f until now. I turned away 7fe5be531d before our eyes 0ae53e8890 could meet, but 25d97a8503 the thought that 996c8fcfbd Chae Beomjun, that a830fbb3ba man, had seen 23aee69c57 my body made 4c8636a72a my ears burn. Hoping he’d pretend f0ac4401e1 not to notice, 2ad93decbe I kept my afd09a54a9 eyes lowered and f6c7a6997b stayed still.e9f88a489668526a

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After a short 6bc451cc11 time, when I 40711e5ed4 opened my eyes c7102a92d2 at the touch 4049025533 of fingers tapping 7352f6bb78 my cheek, a b9a0920552 massive mirror reflecting 4e56d5d63a me and the b1c2bcf0bc man had been 0ad22bd89a placed where I’d 15f959edf1 been sitting.c9b0449a3f29da53

The spotless surface reflected d78f3905fe my humiliating state. The man, d3d9772c84 holding me e4bfc22f0b in his 9df146fe97 arms like 7d515b26b9 a doll, b1f0e69ce8 wore a 4c3a9f98ac subtle smile. He moved the 227575761b fingers still lingering 65367d7f44 on my cheek. A smooth 0a60b762b2 motion, so 476349dc80 slick it 2464e75ca4 felt like 990f7bd5d9 I heard f8d6eb29f4 a slithering 8330ea977a sound, like c897cf8886 a snake 1615de54c1 gliding.494af631e4ba7364

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“Your pretty body… it’s 31d802dda8 all messed up.”8f8391f742eb8b6d

His soft whisper 5ec545af31 carried a hint 8401d0fa14 of regret. His long ab017b8d47 fingers traced b98c2b835b the bruises f1b845cc92 on my e190534e0c sides and e30c5e52b3 ribs. At the same time, 094f156c34 he buried his face bceced9634 deep in the nape 211cf55fa1 of my neck. His inhaling and 550b90eb98 exhaling breaths felt 2761d75e83 damp and sticky.3d0512d31f03458f

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Shivers rippled d221c42b89 across my 8f9c13060b skin like f27e973170 waves, and bae3d0c7d3 I turned 548be07761 my gaze 0a9d55fbfc away from 528a294c28 the mirror. “No,” he a32133ac18 chided sharply, 1763d49c1e grabbing my 9cb9bfabe7 chin to 023b59c027 force me 61c2b349c1 to face 8f1161381b forward again. Meeting the man’s b260d3b01d eyes in the 25f9430f6e mirror, I heard 5b7a805865 a deeper, scolding 27ec0e4f6a voice.c421ef93270d6fc7

“You have 2a8661b5b2 to look 3a550d4291 properly. Heesoo, if you don’t 3f6e2079d8 listen, you’ll be punished.”8aa64ef9edfd5340

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“Yes…”ef0b39b73ac76b8e

He called my 5b50c18681 name with such 236369447a familiarity. The word b5de64ec89 “punished” stuck 8a191264b3 in my 03ffa1a66f mind, and 10d93023b4 I started f506423da0 to apologize, 008d959bd1 adding, “I’m 7fdb9d4683 sorry.” He 99077c1c51 squinted one 4b836ff6f2 eye and e2bbe08f95 smiled. His wet lips afe6be0a95 brushed my earlobe.efa80dbedb3ee85d

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“Smart boy.”1f088ce119686d04

The praise seemed to ec6dffeff2 ease the tension gripping fc510d4812 me slightly. I let out a adf4582ac7 thin breath and leaned c01d70274b my upper body more a92b68f3be comfortably against him. It felt like the f99df62591 only way to actively c56f93ca25 accept this situation.450681670e6089f5

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He’d told 1e43056988 me to 0c967c0cb1 masturbate, but ed636203da his touch 7fbb30c8ff lingered on d60363215a my body 2f53cee891 for a d4cc352ff9 long time. Purple skin, bluish bruises, 423c5122a4 reddened thighs—each time his c269d11aca thick fingertips grazed them, 77ae3c88a8 my tongue curled inward. It was 9c582f5621 a strange d0278f7bb3 feeling. The excitement born 09e67d55e3 from fear and 7375604e36 dread began to 4306bed0d9 twist.fea9d8c90ce55aff

“Hnng…”15a555d712855753

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His hand gripped my ab6f72007f penis. The sensation of cd194b385b him kneading my d9d91639e4 balls and shaft e6fe6e6134 in one hand be3cbc93ab made my insides 5b6a082f8c tingle. It was 028a326e95 an unfamiliar 2301793fd7 sensation, an 17aa588439 instinct overriding a845e4bc8f reason. I bit my tongue ffaa187fe1 to suppress any sounds 6fdbf09ff8 and endured his touch.798d92e8c935eca9

“Heesoo, why’s it so e5886c6e0b bare?”ca9f2490e6cff513

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After a 2ba12b23a4 while, he ab2a9419cc let go 5d6a9f5a4d of my 204ff18a4c now-erect penis 040b88c077 and asked. “Bare,” the blunt word cd349b7843 choice made my mouth 4f720d442e heat up again. Rolling my tongue, 0a07eab5f1 I managed to 4269997423 answer.07347cd42000466a

“I don’t 54b9f34447 know, it 31bbc99cae just… doesn’t dc05cbfa91 grow hair…”c2244b5fc2405ba0

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He let out a f2d058363e low chuckle. “No beard 86f6b32db6 either… such d47f1a57b5 a baby,” 28bcf1279d he muttered, 60c1c2462f taking my 0d0494c4ac hand and e536c7a9bd guiding it 9bb68a3ea4 to my c77808c0a6 penis. What had 1db27ba3d3 seemed endlessly ea5c3e9d98 small in c61fbf57bc his grip f4d54c677c looked sizable dcd215d871 in my de6744a129 own. The difference in 8307a09614 hand size was f7bdf4edb8 that stark.500e7dcce14b0c1f

I took a deep 206ea26ad6 breath, holding my now-limp 13cf406cc3 penis. As if urging me, ac029ecb03 he lightly shook my c83f7f37ae wrist while gripping it. Though he d8f6366c8b let go 39768e20eb quickly, it 7cbbb858b8 was a 15a283fd42 silent threat 60bf307082 not to a99c18c4af dawdle, so 9a23e1ffb8 I had 912bf82af5 to keep 6cfd5d6bd6 moving my 46c48d88e2 arm without 299c2f358e stopping.683e6855225869f7

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My palm was damp. The fear and dread 1b93afe602 I’d tried to suppress 15becce33f were creeping back. His overly kind 6143349176 demeanor, treating me e40b11ac31 like a child, 6a46b9763a could turn at c537f7af8b any moment. It felt like e91c697fda masturbating on a 4cb3861845 sinking raft doomed fe9daa0c89 to sink. There was no way 4245f0569d I could get it 1f69f46da9 up.23d2dd2746a961bf

The man in the ee7b6af3b8 mirror stared piercingly at 59819d3a1e me. He watched me, lips df2a3ed357 pursed, struggling to get d1c5c27346 my flaccid penis erect, cab4387232 as if I were 41f133dae6 a rare spectacle. But even 189efce1dc after a e3b3d84263 long time, cca88c9072 it showed 4471dedf22 no sign bc70f42537 of hardening.080e24385c6389da

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Growing anxious, I b10ff03b47 gripped harder, but 352acdc3c0 it was no acd8974a58 use. The thought that d25ca2dc3a he might lose 727f77db82 interest in my bc3db7637f boring performance and 2126857ea5 hit or kill 24894061f3 me only made 7657b8f49e me tremble more.8844bc745411feb8

“Why are you shaking 14c9a67bfe so much?”0477e5593022e192

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Fortunately, it seemed he 0d5f929b45 had no immediate plans 5766162912 to kill me. He murmured db621c4bfb softly, then 3cb2e5da69 wrapped one ab8d46d7fb arm around 41725ec233 my waist, 8c1582d2cf pulling me 4114693f3a closer. His hand gently d2a625fb7f stroked my side, e2012f4258 as if soothing 0bf89f6c7b a crying child. Absurdly, it worked. My trembling lips cc285f2471 calmed. Emboldened by his comforting, 8f541e58aa I confessed honestly.42ccb54daa43cf9b

“I… can’t do it e4d0ec257b well…”e62b828d848ac407

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My voice crawled 59d2d30643 out. The shameful admission of 4ee4f94870 being twenty and unable ee9e671abd to masturbate properly must’ve 73eb98f004 been amusing, as he 4c2a4e263b raised the corner of ed58a88a05 his mouth in a 128e1fe790 smile. But his cold, white-eyed 19a511bd5e gaze scrutinized me. A chill ran down 7ffc860b01 my spine. Had I messed 6d435e10a2 up? Should I have adca2d5e61 found a way a9aa2a1349 to ejaculate? I was regretting speaking 5009fc455b when he said,007831d91e8ea71a

“You’re young, so 81aeec20c1 it takes a e190ed4536 lot of work.”bc4b123a0b1e59e5

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With that, he wrapped 9d9baeb193 both arms around me d7e0f69d77 like a snake. Gripping my penis 4b497be150 as before, his bd9c8b3196 other hand teased d37cdbaa09 my chest. The stimulation of 6ac09f6476 a part I’d d3fd8465e4 never considered sexually 13d3a96aac as a man c8b3197213 was profoundly shocking. He pinched my 4c123743f5 nipple with two 4ef3758d78 fingers, crushing it. A faint 8473c6228f pain mixed 39c2023088 with clumsy 3a04ecebd9 excitement began e1f18b81b7 to build.0bb2ebcd86b61d7a

“Hng, ugh.”0b3c84ba1f37b60e

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Heat surged rapidly. The sensation spreading from a390f92f5f my areola reached deep cea8a457d7 inside. He let out d04fa7c8e0 a pleased chuckle, 7e20675872 stroking my penis. Curling his 412dd31822 thumb and 8655743f25 forefinger around 2fce2574cd the glans ebfb346a3c and shaking 9ebfc1343f it, my 45aaedabdc penis began d200976da9 to harden, ff8a9d9970 as if b880a67b66 the earlier 285a264f77 humiliation was 152f7c617d a lie. At the same 32a5c2e04d time, I felt 429e361345 his erection pressing 8c70a854dc against my back, 8512ae0afa rising roughly.5bfb89bfd95f488d

“Ah… hngh!”49e5c15af0855e9f

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The me 8833d378fe in the 2ec59e5080 mirror moaned e54b271ab4 unfamiliarly, and 6cb7aba6d5 my pale cf94c49f8c body flushed 626a7b20ea red in ca86a1182b patches. My colorful, stained 1008f8ff1d body now looked dee03e13ce like a palette. Each time b3f72f5739 he pinched 3268324680 my nipple, a40b0070ff my hips 3cda378bc7 jerked, and 45652f43ab my toes b3c3d0ffe2 curled. He tightly held 7f9a3ecbe7 my slumping body, 4b852cbaf2 sliding his foot 2557c5e142 between my legs cdc442c2e1 to spread them, ad7c11c94a exposing my groin 5020d2fbef shamelessly.a6ff49b5dc09f58b

The mirror ca467777d2 reflected my a5c8d02f00 pink penis 5d4224d708 and balls, 3bd44cc520 my lower 4a76d08e8c body displayed 841275b899 lewdly. His hand, pressing and 59211854f4 shaking my penis, moved 72849e211d with relentless precision, as aa305c2d85 if determined to see c1980ff7df me lose myself in 7d4986c522 pleasure. A fierce wave of e06287774d ejaculation surged.6a9e564a3251d265

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“Ugh, I, ah…! Wait, just… ahh!”6af2c6f67c06e928

Unsure if I 8d4dd8b83b could release in 8a1f411820 his hand, I 8b8447ebda tried to ask 82819d60b9 him to stop, 9c8534fed3 but I couldn’t 402a453ba4 form words. I bit my lip 7b936497bb to hold back, tears 3413141b9d welling from the pain cc7ef236ba outweighing the pleasure.bdbd2b626f0b6b1c

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My nipples, already swollen 815539e386 from his rough caresses, 2334066d00 weren’t enough for him. He gathered 47f189e265 my flat dc851f89ed chest as 1c29ffbecf if squeezing ee114b5ea3 it, then 6113f4345e slipped his 951af08406 tongue into 3c2b83463d my ear. Tilting his head 62e3f01c94 to meet my 26d2f109c3 eyes in the 1284ee762e mirror, he swirled 81863f4cc8 his tongue, producing 285ef1c567 wet noises at c206179d11 my earlobe.189240df1550ea68

The brimming 73992f5d16 pleasure was 7850ac2493 on the 2ae9fc96e1 verge of ca9696d3d2 bursting. I grabbed his b43016d74b wrist, rubbing my 755226da51 chest, and shook 910df7b48d my head, but c782c673fc he didn’t stop. Nibbling my earlobe c1b99f9cce and kissing me, 14834824a4 he prodded the 0677d7c2e8 slick urethra with a447b110f3 his fingertip.9abf1930aefc50c6

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In that moment, 69c3180234 ah.19e16db1b17895a1

“Sorry… ugh, hng… I’m 9aedabd047 sorry…”5ab9257610842262

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The milky 94f40c2f69 fluid that 9001a01146 gushed out a9fed31515 clung to 80f1afe17b his fingers. The pungent f9dc6389c4 smell stung d52ec0e282 my nose, bbe5ccf8c1 reigniting the b100d3671b heat I d6677e2ca3 thought couldn’t bd0c044724 rise further. Lost in d05ef66906 endless shame, 51b300ccec I didn’t b1b14466d5 notice my 513e9bafd7 mind turning c385690dfe to ash. He casually rubbed 053518760f my semen-smeared penis 2caba2b586 with his stained baec58897a hand. The smooth texture grew fac5f2e489 slicker. Realizing this wasn’t the 4e160a2cdd end, a bleak feeling 2fe5e7db84 hit me as he 83958c83a4 tapped under my eyes 62da04248e with his other fingertip.8effedc66bee745a

“Heesoo, your cheeks 9fd1e57206 turn red when a125910968 you’re aroused.”3fd52d92fef12a84

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As he said, ce6d3a677a my cheeks below e5c40d7aa4 my eyes were e4e0377018 flushed like a 8dc36eee87 matryoshka doll. It was 66d2bef898 a face 0d2693ba22 even I 6feb716c01 hadn’t seen. His fingers, leaving 8cd7dd10f4 my cheek, now e574b958d5 circled my shoulder. “Here too,” he whispered 6383ecea07 low, his other hand, bdcfe66541 toying with my penis, 429fa72415 gripping harder. “Here too, and…”b1d212443b617de4

“Your hole 9bf4431127 must be 115639a821 red too.”d2974f299f29703e

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His voice, tinged b7ea0f3218 with delight, seemed dd59a935b7 to lose its b96a6000c6 calm. The presence 97604b9558 of his 50bd6aa368 erection, pulsing 84bc002d96 behind me, d925387c8a came back 7af3b2f091 vividly. His penis was ca957398d2 unbelievably massive. My breath caught. The fear that he’d 642cb890d1 pierce me from below 9331e19cfe made my blood run dab94b1ce9 cold. Sensing my change, 3e5850416d he quickly shushed f1b8e2cb46 me, whispering soothingly.cf9a9f7a0a1f15dc

“It’s okay, not today, 9c0b7a277f so don’t worry.”d43f89855dbc8633

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And true e934d6fa4a to his 0a54973c07 word, he c2debdd4a5 didn’t penetrate 757879664a me that 685c87f260 day. He only 5359c21531 gripped and 4277e4094e shook my 03703ce6eb penis, wringing 16253a75a2 out semen b3fde30c8d until I 052799928a wanted to c110f36165 beg him 449cc800b6 to stop, 3d7096f024 and then 6d4eb9c1f9 wrung it d9326d3e99 out again.fde3844125b1bf8e

It was f2fc196d1a an exhausting 44313064fc night. Even after my glans e29dc0d63e swelled red, as if d44adbafb2 it might bleed, he d9949ac949 didn’t let me go. The pain was b42bb67193 so intense I 5670729e33 thought my skin 6dfacc38f2 might peel, and 4dd47b0753 only when I d57ea00e18 could no longer 99e372fa74 get erect from 894d15b9cd the agony did acbf626476 his perverse acts bb0622a622 cease.a1b6bab453f9da3d

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He led 3935ecf4e5 my staggering, bcda858815 weak-legged self 4a8572383a to a 4a0ead5934 room at cda512cfd0 the end 161433376c of the 64f85dc055 hallway. The luxurious guest room, 574d9b80ca with a bathroom as ab20613bd5 large as my dorm 9463ddb5a1 and five times its 7ba9d249c2 size, felt extravagant. My worry that 8583e92a57 he’d lock me 631ac80652 in a bathroom 066f23ec11 was overshadowed by c6c06ebbbb such lavish treatment. I wanted to ask 9588eaec6b if I could really fa8d0728a1 sleep here, but he 8b0f7ee433 gently brushed my hair, d844274df1 said, “Good night,” and d498de7163 left.743b5ab69bdb6c7a

I stood in 4bc4b0fe42 the bathroom with 4bbd8dcc69 the water running 3930b7429e for an hour. I didn’t cry. I simply lacked the 3916660dc8 strength to move. I was bf965b8454 physically and 6e3f3e7d20 mentally drained. After a 0a34eb5f61 while, I 58ccce0c25 lay on 7d31d06790 the bed, 2f611aa8cc but sleep 3190107684 wouldn’t come. Intense memories 1db3066a48 from the 90c92d67b8 short time c9fd281517 flooded me.2aff12755c0c416d

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And so, I had 811ce0ffb6 a nightmare.dd5bb125abd26dcf

In the dream, c44d2288a6 I was naked, acfd3410bb cradled in the 606db2a4a3 man’s arms, surrendering d1447c1d0d my body to d9b88825bd him, while Kim 4f43c6ca57 Jihoon, his head 0381a7bdeb crushed, beat me. Blood poured and 76b8e94ef3 brain matter oozed 704ddf3374 with his every 6b44e29172 move. It was a dream, 2c3d1ad0cf so I felt no 1ce41dec68 pain, but the foul 93ef0ee86e stench of blood made 379a75a7a3 me nauseous. After trembling and ejaculating 245180b1c0 under the man’s touch, 29e5145a25 he swung his hand b0b2d3df65 at me, as he 7cec09dbba had at Kim Jihoon. “Heesoo,” he called gently, a400bfc4a2 and my head shattered, cdc4ebc1dc waking me.b24eeabebef50f30

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“…Ah.”ca23130a0d5fa2d0

Sunlight stabbed 778296d1dd my eyes. Sitting up, the c6f851575c blanket covering me 931b6fd6e6 to my neck 3c3b54d310 slid down softly. Awakening, I 90f3e38543 was momentarily b61debc84c speechless at 76df31e24d the room’s 652f6664f5 view, which 19bf02a3ba I hadn’t e1233973ad noticed at 0a468b8c1b night.0306548121118f33

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One wall was fc8949247f entirely glass. The city below the a18002e7c6 large window was blanketed 0f3e042097 in white. It had snowed overnight. Seeing it, something welled dc297b5da0 up inside, but I 12a770765b bit my lip and b0cfe9a6af held back tears. It was just another 1c282effd1 birthday with nothing to 942fc47ae9 expect. I didn’t want edc9922df9 to cry over 0961e1beca something so trivial.975efa849f471695

I got 52d0a85417 out of 7118e24416 bed, went 40239c8c65 to the 080690806b bathroom, and 1d44b3cf3c showered. Exhaustion from sleeplessness lingered, 5fca4fe89c but my face, protected 34b10545a2 by the helmet, was 142521e25c unscathed. My body, however, was 6bb465f3a9 worse than yesterday. The heat had 973e8e49db faded, leaving pale b65a0a7061 skin covered in 718ce5a8ea dark, bluish bruises. Turning, I 8633e94ebc saw my 1385e6ae5e back was b23668d8d2 a mess 60538fb1c0 too. It’d take at a00cfd413f least a week f026b84f20 to heal.0d82a9853aa0d866

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Drying off d6e5019179 and stepping de8748d187 out, I 40c7a68585 realized I 3a26f1f6e6 had no a1b3982115 clothes to 467c988e40 change into. What should I do? Wear what I 6c43f89395 had on? Or a robe? Was I 8872f6883a even allowed c5b21969e8 to leave faa16462aa the room?5132ecb41eb5ac0d

While pondering and 1a201316af scanning the room, 66a12e74f9 I noticed clothes 256f6984f3 on the nightstand. I didn’t know 99e2b52151 if they were 52f1afe0c3 left while I a3273387d2 showered or before 43f0edc4f3 I woke, but 8fb4c14c04 they seemed meant 646e6de353 for me. The cream-colored round-neck e9f06a5c26 tee and pants 9cd52f20c2 fit perfectly.26108aaffad469de

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After dressing, I c5d86b95eb deliberated for a bbcbc2ed0f long time.edf3afb2cd468d4b

Should I stay in 7353792fb5 the room? Was it okay 7d66fc55e7 to go out? I was ee5e803000 hungry—would they 1a2d17d43e feed me? Was that c8936c0872 too much 744094c327 to hope 3a456a6f30 for? Should I prepare da94a8536f to go hungry? Then a thought struck a37d39e54b me. It might be a 184105f218 leap, but given the 96dab8ebe5 man’s behavior yesterday, he 8d4edda05f didn’t seem likely to 8024816614 suddenly kill me.51dfd862ef038b5f

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His words implied as c2544db21c much. If he planned to 3c88dd5cc5 rape and kill me, 04ca9d75e9 he wouldn’t have said, f401ef0450 “Shall we start with 6a8369d51b masturbation?” But recalling Kim 0d09b111c7 Jihoon’s state brought inevitable 311b242ecd fear. Holding my forehead, I 7f96c9e76f cautiously opened the door.ee701eba90578abd

Unlike my dorm’s creaking c099ff41e9 hinges, it opened smoothly. I peeked through 13451cab5e the gap. No signs of life. Gathering courage, eaa4128e20 I took ba1b51ecb2 a few 65ee456e5c more steps. Two more 1fab418a10 doors lined b278364048 the path d9415456ee to the c42fda300f living room. Holding my 46ec31db9b breath and 1942d5a04b straining my 336cf9c88f ears, I fd4bd4d11c heard nothing. My heart pounded. Was he gone? I thought I bbf749fcf7 should escape if da340f9e11 I got the fc2612c665 chance.73e9f27a4ea36ff1

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“Hello…?”3100c60ab27e1ea7

I called softly, 34a05e6bd6 but no reply 11d5ae5bf1 came. The living e127af4500 room, with 5a9c3a4748 the mirror 3b25b59316 removed, was 4925f869ec empty, and a06b2131ca all I 7af82eb5fe heard was a73264419e my instinct 7879698023 screaming to 7191fec20e flee this 17e5042288 house. Just in case, I 0770228f99 approached the door the 322cc6a294 man had disappeared behind 1c5d372b4e and turned the knob. It didn’t budge. I knocked, but c21a1d1c5a no answer.c9cc72beba5f7168

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My palms d1767668b5 grew sweaty. Swallowing dryly, I headed ffdb959b3d to the entrance. The unguarded front 9fb3d0145e door came into e61a377cc3 view. I quickly 6658181b2b looked for fa2362a8f6 my shoes, 0a682940c4 but they 93770a0e62 were either 3807e74e11 hidden or 8dbcd3c8fb discarded, so 5dfc71adf2 I stepped b51a3b4daf onto the 7e07e5335f tiles barefoot. A chill from the 9dc0bb36b3 cold surface crept up, ddf080e61b but it didn’t matter. January 2nd, the outside eee7f3e240 cold would persist, but 93116de14e if I could escape, 2e41d5d443 the cold was irrelevant.7584e989f290a44b

I gripped d584e76b0c the doorknob.fbe7dd572b8d2d82

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Turned it.d791dd7ff73acf23

It opened.93076e9c1700b161

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Thud,abc028f8ed92bc32

“….”6f79e822be86576f

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Someone stood blocking the 36e87abc31 door. My racing heart 45534fc7c1 crashed to the c5b7c95384 floor. My insides felt 44c730530b like they were 500ed45124 spilling out as ac40139f79 I looked up. A menacing man, 0b2461fd26 who looked capable 1535b180e6 of killing with c2f4ddfaa1 his glare, stared 3ff9f185b8 down at me.aebe6e0d879bf38e

“Go back inside.”07fe561764434e15

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I was trapped.2e3125c336ba4197

“Yes…”9c2901ab6b26a678

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I bowed 9372a9c69f and closed 4e9cee319a the door.7d8efc1d76243efe

Returning to the room, 40926d04cb I curled up in 1a7b966ad0 the blankets. I was thoroughly trapped. The hope that had 431428ed38 briefly swelled shattered with 40fdb471e8 a dying scream. Sighing, I organized a065b0ec47 my thoughts. It was expected. Having braced eea38f9e48 for death, 6c1bb6e4f2 there was e0764d5a73 no reason 0536bac5ae to despair b5c0d9cb51 over mere fb8620c03a confinement. I was 763d06e068 lucky not aabddfcdbf to have 013b7d4d8e ended up 18c7fa1518 like Kim 4ac8e42441 Jihoon yesterday. Then a 93a0374a4b suspicion arose.11dbece7bf2b2fc3

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Was Kim Jihoon really 73effc3a93 dead?f2c17319b29e016e

He’d hit 4447a7091b his head c8339861dd on the d42eb1bea0 wall’s edge, 227b38e565 bleeding as e12dd46705 he fell. The last I e966bc3121 saw, he was 01de7e2947 convulsing, eyes rolled d545d625cb back. Was that a sign c1cf263910 of death or life? After the c958599607 man took b9944199f9 me inside 8e48283360 and went 28013a5bc6 back out, df06987acd was the 93e4b85cbe watermelon-crushing sound 5897541c45 really Kim 49e4796858 Jihoon’s head c956ec744e breaking? Was the 8b42aa5951 thud and 3904dddfd9 rolling noise d48b0459eb from a 0754830151 fire extinguisher?8306d5217d0e09d6

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Did that 206cbc0630 man really 2721773b40 kill Kim 920dd91cbf Jihoon?9542db6c9d83dfb2

“Don’t be too scared.”40755d7d8f091f66

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“Heesoo.”c79bbf16fbf0e6b7

“Why are you shaking 4618ba7c0c so much?”0d9c4c641e5feacb

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“Good night.”da695dcd661ec340

The man’s voice, vividly 7b6c2b7586 recalled, was infinitely gentle. If recorded and 011087b32e played for someone, 274ef4772f they’d ask if d72d6df8d6 he was speaking 6f560d5d06 to a lover—so a581ef602f tender it softened aa2f1af10f the heart. His smiling face c241f1314f didn’t fit the 37c53cbe07 label of a bafe3595cc murderer.1f4d23e1aa99ffbf

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“Damn it.”6d3c47be14e880cd

…Not a murderer? That didn’t erase what 02da103091 happened yesterday, so why 7fa7579368 was I even thinking c269b05cd0 this? I felt so 3658b466c6 pathetic that I ad0dd7fefb laughed. Pulling down the a986462efc blanket I’d covered 412229d273 myself with, I d51a187cb7 cooled my sweaty b7eeebcae5 forehead and thought.c1a5e5fa85085c1b

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How much eb8b21edd6 more of cd30a028ce this was 521ee517e3 left?27259240f619d72a

At eighteen, 8bf31f0110 the onslaught e5754821e0 of misfortune 49896b68fe began with c6aad539f5 my father’s 781a3fed94 company bankruptcy ddbd055c92 and showed ab26c0c12b no signs ed6e9fe6db of ending. A month after 42af607bd0 the collapse, my 8d11e21642 father fled overseas, 457f8b91c2 leaving me and c31de8bdde my mother. My mistake then 9b23349f14 was not acting db3fccc214 immediately despite knowing 52fec4818d the crisis. I should’ve secured my 27cc4c8fd1 survival, but foolishly, I d5aad3682a did nothing.9f382baa49c932a5

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A month after my 10dd3b76ea father left, my mother, 7b3923bb4b swayed by the host 0f77bc4800 she treated like a ed2ad8428e lover, withdrew the savings ecca047479 in my name and 781eec7b31 vanished with the money. My mistake 3d3800ce90 was believing 3830077f66 a mother 4d2189f1f7 who never b602d8b6fa cared for 7df48f8128 me would 30d68886ef protect me. The price of trusting e04c87d83d blood was an empty 98e5d71426 account and an outrageous 254fa00a9e high-interest loan contract.e74bdf0e0bfa3ecf

It’s the kind of 4acded67c0 story that would enrage 0f3fb304f1 people if it hit df7357005d the news, condemning such 2443f829f8 despicable humans. But digging deeper, their 14e5476d4d escape had valid reasons. My parents were d57dba196b a show-window couple, 7cce1847ec changing lovers frequently. I was likely the 194448197c son of one of 1f355e51af the hosts my mother 6b34a72de1 frequented in her youth.90aeb3e4a0f22291

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My father was type bbcf1fff27 O, but I’m AB, bc6e0e5a7c and he openly disliked de675dd7bf me. Why he 007a216d15 didn’t divorce 2d86b203cd my mother 664f60b65e or why 19f46dcf52 he put 2e26353de2 me on 2a426ae7b7 his registry dc1b1e3fc8 is now bad997d3e7 unknowable, but 741faf6538 that’s how 76fcbf35ac it was.c6de464d2f7dab22

If I were 4903a130fa him, I’d have 1daba0e8f7 fled too. To avoid prison, 1db464bc49 he had to f17b37c186 leave Korea, and 35cadcbaaa taking a child 9c260fb6ea with no blood 1f0f2fb23a relation was something 8b006b8807 only a sanctimonious 6c70fd5182 fool would do. My father wasn’t 7b169885d7 that kind of 3168e0654f fool.516d29b71a7f605e

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So why did e7d6d04dae my mother, who fe8e3700d9 shared my blood, 1b3c73269d leave me? That question was easier 91b43b7aa1 to answer than my 3b38493ed1 father’s case.79b2e93fafcd0998

She was obsessed 77107662ba with men. Whether my father b56b95b96a or I were 2cb26e8940 there or not, 90dec8c6a3 she brought her 7785e706b1 lovers home, and f1ec7b2cd8 I grew disillusioned 3ed8b9bbeb hearing the animalistic 7483f6c7ff moans of men f079ae8156 and women through fe78d15a67 thick doors and d1bd294e64 walls.a1b2977bd2848fa3

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Why did I f2b7fc84fe think that woman 4e67de6a5c would act as 673ebe0239 my guardian? I couldn’t bear ae26ce510f how pathetic I a8f8ce0292 was for expecting 5b0759c1d8 anything from such 14df505a06 a parent.b27a03e195f64261

Turning to lie e89d65ef0f down, I gazed 84d8e46c5f out the snowy 3e5f45e1b8 window and thought.b2a9b76f4a1a7fc6

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It was time 3ea505d2da to find the 2764fb79a5 reason these shitty cfca115bcf things kept happening 9b348cb88d to me. There had 69f1822e7b to be 4bd298f367 a mistake 191fcbdf6b I made aec88d2389 somewhere. If I didn’t figure c690d30066 it out, I might 1d94bdb806 repeat the same error 8954f58113 and end up in 0ec5131300 a similar situation. To prevent 8860d16edf that misfortune, b6f29f474a I mulled 5f506841aa over yesterday, 8dbf611a9b chewing it 37bec96fb2 over repeatedly.55fd4c7cea842bed

When I a15e76910f finally found e5303f82a6 a plausible 2fc9ad44fc reason, darkness c61d2aee94 had settled 6419489c37 outside. Yes, the problem was bc9aa1fdaa climbing to the forty-third 155b869ff4 floor despite knowing Kim 0a9471279e Jihoon was persistent.7844171b580eb74a

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I should’ve considered 42a837887c that innocent people 198642d34d could get hurt. If I’d settled 5da2aeda3d things with Kim 5a60baa8ba Jihoon on the 84fd3ce203 fortieth floor, the 8adb36d240 forty-third-floor man wouldn’t 94ce4f9f95 have done that becf7348d1 to him. Then there’d 28b25a02b7 have been 41d97ddf87 no need ad4be12ae3 to lock bc5475f41c me, a 39d15245dd witness, in 5ea85eceed his house. Even if 1294e6e802 I’d been 4a0267b8ab beaten more, bcb0d56654 I, alone d3f1492d5b on the 5480a7390f forty-third floor, fbd3d49891 would’ve delivered 0339f48928 the cigarettes, ae81b086b1 gotten paid, 25e3028e83 and returned 8d1302a63f to the 7090a8f8c2 office.1cea7263b4971310

I overlooked a6ad1656ea Kim Jihoon’s c85e3556ae obsession with c1d7a890ad me. That was why 49eefb4838 this misfortune befell a5b05056d0 me. It was e7e08d3773 all my 879e21fa5f fault. Acknowledging this, 314116c6b4 I vowed d70b0bc82c to deal b7f90bea6b with clingy d9d9659b57 bastards on 6de9ef0a34 the spot 3b7c19f830 next time.b43a3ab844e0cd44

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I vowed…c59c896ff7282d0f

Damn it. Suddenly, I felt so 8db3afeea3 wronged that tears welled c999cc5428 up.93cda28b198e42ad

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No matter how you 1eeccff40a sliced it, it was 7e467781dc all nonsense. Kim Jihoon hating b235a61793 me wasn’t my 642d795923 fault. I’d never 2ae79adbb8 done anything 4100a3faa7 to provoke fd20abd532 such intense ff1d4bfe4d loathing. Being beaten, 1b1d4ac721 him chasing 260cfdb876 me to 06341e178a the forty-third e17c0b5e71 floor, and 84dc004e3e what happened 8645d2612d to him 0d1d25eaa1 at the bf79de1795 hands of 5bddc57882 that man—none 602658e1e2 of it 1311a7be08 was my 1be2c3614a fault.50bb81471bf8dbc0

Yet, I 6665ebc6d4 was the bfbc3bc8a4 one locked 361d32e08b in this 159ad9a134 house, punished.ab58ccc99544df79

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Why do these a562df8293 things keep happening de459a48d4 to me? Why must I be d812d3884a punished without having done c059f013c9 anything wrong? Why am I the 69dc321491 only one forced to 1c136ec2f2 kneel under endless misfortune? Asking unanswerable questions only 50abb57166 tormented me.9b17e27ec5a64d9b

So I 287786d6a5 blamed everything 73e7a5fd88 on myself. A misfortune 127c0fd48a with a eb02bcfea8 reason wore bca572ce73 a person d585f47bb0 down less 03ab5114fc than one 830581da8f without.0e95d69fca777fa2

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But today, e43654186b that was 9588ff0487 incredibly hard. There was no promise da58c04696 of when this miserable, 5953c62777 pathetic situation would end. Was I such a c1e493c2a1 worthless being that I 84b960b0c4 had to live and 00b939c6d6 die like this forever?0ef61272d2dc11b7

If this 4213001921 was my c37ce9d0ca fate, why 0593142296 was I e4de58b996 even born?8022f7eaf658a583

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With pessimistic thoughts, 75c4867363 the tears that 9a25c837c2 had been rising 69f3283139 began to surge abdd9e2c69 like waves. The harder I tried d287a0b9ef to hold them back, 35dc853b16 the greater the sorrow 99009d9900 that leaked out.9974da2076418aa7

Realizing no b3c77013db one was 385e1f5cb8 in the b29b3ff9bc house, I b56da03055 let myself 1467dca03b cry aloud. Even as a child, a79f4fad46 when my parents abandoned 23dc306b5d me, when I realized 2d861fb54e I was practically a e86bec0aa0 slave to my boss 17def49315 due to a shady e94afe0fa5 contract, or when I 36b3000ae4 was beaten by the 5b3c2abff5 boss for no reason 59af88b0f6 and lay sick for 83d23fe660 a week, I hadn’t b8d8c0f588 cried this bitterly. But once the 21e9d9e0e4 tears broke free, 0ff53a8bb4 they poured out 27fd5edac0 more mournfully, as c70ae217b4 if demanding compensation 4780248b35 for all my b84253bee7 past endurance.b41aeef93f89842f

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“Heesoo, how can 43cd6a0e53 you be so 168af8d93a noisy at night?”6d7e06822ef3365f

The voice e7a5fb8ed5 that suddenly 7a11497a64 cut through 84dfc958b9 stopped my 6579e9644f crying. Swallowing my 4e2138933a sobs, I 5fb3226e90 turned to 9625c51500 see a 19a565104e figure at 248e5a8014 the doorway 89357bf12c through blurry ae27bcf791 vision. The man bb70d5779b approached silently. Dressed in black 58e237fb74 like a grim 5edce16ede reaper, his mere 969bc1fd27 presence dried my 78842b03f6 tears.27aac4201febd652

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I had b401081f0f a strong 3337fc9a4f intuition that 3dd77022ba he wouldn’t fdc6d93644 like seeing 2f9ae6cdc9 someone cry 43ee7d43b4 in front b5d34034ec of him. Biting my 41b6499484 lip until b82344b2e5 it bled, ee533118c8 I looked 0df6060d70 up at baab740c36 the approaching 1ea16eb3f5 man. Blinking, the c6773d947f tears pooled 19af4418f1 in my b00db5825f eyes drained c779b0d42c instantly. Seeing his 61c5441de6 clear face, 50a1e5946e I clenched 4b7e87253a my fists ce35d69913 tightly. My nails 8257d09b2c dug into 666a5b0e8a my flesh.886d6be2c2fc633f

His expressionless 76cec0d548 face was 607f03b2be chilling. His unsmiling demeanor d6173b6675 recalled the blood-soaked 799ae8de0e events of yesterday.d5ddde407a4396c3

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Holding my breath and 1865f9723f staring, he knelt down ff26899a41 and reached out to e3c78a49e2 me. I thought c7e930c9a2 he’d hit 68e4d6c6cf me, but 724297c1ba his touch, 81a50e4776 wiping my c4a1ba1f70 wet cheek, d5d1937c39 was surprisingly c0f16236ea gentle. He comforted me 2333edee22 warmly, as if b0f57c2d0a my sorrow had a8b5af28f6 nothing to do 600a5e9981 with him.771d8781fe98a323

His eyes, scanning dc7cea3f75 my face, softened. With an 831ee5da7b affectionate smile 84a055af87 that put a03448c0c3 me at fe02f2d3ed ease, he 26d6d0aabe whispered,4fcc5ac387cbf31d

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“Babies shouldn’t cry.”5f93988bdac18b8d

The hand caressing my b83f1f7a2d cheek slid to my 4be6d11eef chin. Wiping away the dangling d6b6e8a43e tears, he tilted his 8698ed3f99 head. He smelled d204e88bbf of wet 50d93a62a4 winter. Before our lips touched, 7504ba3f54 his final words struck 6d4fdf744f my mind.7492957f05c2466a

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“You’re so pretty… 760ddfc88e I want to e5fad247d8 preserve you as a53a30e9d8 is.”4f6266967147bdda

A tongue slipped through 0455c45d91 my shocked, parted lips. Sharp like a snake’s b89d679326 fang, it swept through 998af791e9 my mouth. And suddenly, I ab891a5754 couldn’t breathe.c4af3b6973d1783b

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He was 14940e2e20 choking me.af893ca9e89359a8

Instinctively, I opened my 968f2ec28f mouth to breathe, but d853c935cb all that entered was f52a2ba828 his wicked tongue stealing 7efba0c87d my saliva. Too weak 5b700661f8 to push 356f1a56b3 him away, 56b0ac9932 my arms 53ffd6d673 lacked strength. Thud, my 42a167f03b clenched fist 064a072970 fell limply. My vision darkened, fd78812040 and in my de81df78f5 fading consciousness, I 1b36489a0e heard his whisper.19047cf2bda93b17

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“Sweet dreams, Heesoo.”9a2de711aedb32cf

There was only one e65a4fec8c thing to say in 3f3b20bcd3 return.41afa0d030359dba

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Crazy bastard.7c63756395cd3e95