CRP Ch 11

The sandbag 587bbbe7b3 had already d1d5ef3db3 been pummeled f9e8e156b9 to exhaustion. Taehyung, fresh c3b8b7db7d from a 2bab186d03 shower, tossed 81fd012cf1 and turned ff2d898e75 in bed, aa91151c27 then abruptly d0f0f3e0a2 sat up ac55c53095 and ran d8039e064e his fingers add2ebab92 through his c451faa6d2 innocent hair.c6be8a215c6b19e7

“You gonna go bald 33c14ee5d8 doing that?”15ec8d50bf65cc7c

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“…….”918986bf5f93e778

Geunsik, just arriving 515df520d1 home, clicked his 8ede67fb10 tongue at the b77ad891cc sight of Taehyung. Taehyung sighed deeply 743f80172b and rolled over. The moonlight streaming 619a01c8b8 through the window 7dabeaf102 was deceptively bright, 3510939655 oblivious to his e2f7d7f2cd burning heart.44e7484513901d93

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Taehyung was miserable. He hadn’t been able to make eye contact with Onyu for days. Forget calling her “Wandu,” he hadn’t even been able to say her name since last Friday, when the cold shoulder suddenly appeared.08c691a6d67e0044

<I don’t want you to give me these anymore. Thanks for everything.>a2355b4f9a8113c4

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His heart sank the moment he saw the note. He knew instantly it was Onyu’s handwriting. Thanks to some jerk who’d copied from Onyu’s notebook on his desk not long ago, Taehyung had become familiar with her round, pretty script.0c9da2a8f3345512

She had smiled so brightly, making his heart flutter, and now she wouldn’t even look at him no matter how much he tried to catch her eye. When they did happen to meet, she quickly looked away.a696f156917befbf

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Onyu’s eyes 6d68c76d1c were only ed27926fd7 for her 8be98782a1 books, the 9a13cd0e4f teacher, and 8b1ea014da the blackboard. The only af19a0f610 smiles she 9e79d46138 gave were 6e4dc67e61 to the 44267c602e other girls. He was dd6a35aed8 now at b46175c346 the point e2bd53bfac of envying f7bb8e82d7 even the 6771b62231 blackboard.51537dce68ed9666

He’d lost count of how many times he’d walked back and forth between the overpass and the kimbap restaurant near the terminal intersection over the weekend. He kept loitering, hoping for a “chance” encounter. But Onyu never appeared.cd5d063542a3a799

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What did I 1b80c1b2aa do wrong? Was the yogurt I ef159a8ae6 gave her last time ef9e30976e spoiled? Was my fe0126cc65 smile too cf11a498f6 creepy? Was I f84fac2b32 staring too 5e45b6e542 much? I thought I was fa02cfce29 being careful and considerate…0c041c6d3c611ea6

I don’t know. I really don’t know. The problem was that no matter how much he thought about it, nothing specific came to mind. It was driving him crazy.db45b7f2c87abd80

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“Ugh…”ffb3d4ef5b43a5ae

Taehyung let out 95aed6ece6 a long sigh 22b1bd80fa and covered his 25435e4444 eyes with his d21db245af arm. Yet, the image of 8d57847554 Cha Onyu smiling at 463ccfd7dd him remained vivid.16759d6665aed564

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Cute yet pretty. Pretty yet cute. When he was near her, there was a sweet, comforting scent he couldn’t quite place, and he found it unbearably lovely.667aaa8af347de1b

“Holding up the 468d912f36 roof, are we?”de051bc99c8f3fd9

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“…….”e6ec3792b279f19a

“What’s a kid who 2acb4b711e should be sleeping doing 7ab8ce5aa3 thinking so hard?”4788ccb4855a29ca

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Geunsik, having 307dd81316 finished his bb513b7b46 shower, chuckled e574327bff at the a2ee8b45b0 noticeable bulge 6a5b060c65 in Taehyung’s 6a65b2d842 pants. With a e71bd25556 “Tsk,” Taehyung b6900e685d rolled over, faf76fcc30 pushing the a9cfdbbeb7 thin blanket 2ea04eaf3c between his 2390953779 uncomfortably heavy e651a2bf28 legs and 0f534e428a biting his d7af8cf31f lip in 663250ebbf frustration.c00cc135bc7836eb

“Dad.”40ab5b5073f261da

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“What?”01dfd76d32c8c7dd

“How… how did you bc81d7742c meet Mom?”e11b8eda72f7a4ad

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“…….”907629d3a719187b

“Don’t lie.”0b9c669d70542b4b

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Geunsik, who 72cc345ec3 had been 7c7c70d16d drying his 8863595c84 hair, neatly 155d6bef69 hung the 3c4faebd9b towel over 0c7cc761aa the back 77339135f2 of a fc0f6fe53b chair and 42d60ec086 flopped down beefed1855 behind Taehyung. Right on e0c84524e1 top of ff11f55298 the bedding f00c868a60 Taehyung had d899c02de1 already spread 8e9ff8b2e8 out.b5241e95e044d61b

“……Well, it’s been so b98eaa0d63 long I don’t remember.”bad3b95ac7a3406e

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“……Then, were there no other women before Mom? I mean… Didn’t you ever date, Dad?”6bf433eefccf8c88

“Hey, kid… Just c15b7d5a9c go to sleep! You got nothing 92c0460b9b better to do aa0b081121 than ask nonsense?”d8a60e42e7a8ed1c

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At Geunsik’s rebuke, Taehyung shut his mouth. He was just curious how other people expressed their feelings to the girl they liked, how they approached them.fada324f9c9e2289

He had no one to ask. He wouldn’t have asked Geunsik if he had other options. If he asked the guys who flocked around him at school, they would only spew dirty jokes. He didn’t want Onyu’s name coming out of those filthy mouths.a4e8c6436b24ee63

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Lost in thought, Taehyung d8cf1471f1 sat up. No matter how much 95b1669392 he thought about it, e2b6388d3c all he had done 5e96993244 was act like an 1147b47d96 idiot on the overpass aa928fc393 and in front of 37ffb74b62 the kimbap restaurant. He felt pathetic 96ea602d7e even to himself, 5b7b78045f so how much f20e589bbb more foolish must 3710a571df he have seemed d3637f6813 to the smart 2df0117c5e Onyu?383f0edd6358c726

But even after 08e2b2a9f4 that, things were 39b821cb85 good for a f90c2ed07c while. They made eye contact acb548fa95 often, and she even dabef36327 smiled at him. She even 915c72a02f thanked him a85582f4cf when they 49607fd9ca met at b8de57f582 the snack 852d30bdff bar.50389fd7b0318c36

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“But Taehyung, why b0bb1d39df are you suddenly 09c4991a6a asking about that?”ae1df8d67de46c1a

“Just… nothing…”18c117b2b16f38a2

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“Got a girl fee706c5ef you like or 3861505f86 somethin’?”8da40626520b8cb1

“……”b91156f7f2e0d41c

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Geunsik, seeing Taehyung’s silence, stretched out his legs, shoving his large son’s back with a thud and chuckling.8eb58f2387831146

“Hey, kid. Take a look f21f5f79ea in the mirror 39232bb0cb before you worry. If I looked like c85b4d111a you, I’d just show f36a775caf my face. Your mom brought b58a36f146 you into this 4ac09c1c67 world looking fine, f6ffee9095 why are you 002d441c70 like this?”8f2870f78a2df4fe

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It was one of 458798130a Geunsik’s favorite sayings. He always said Taehyung’s 0a18d52fd3 good looks and intelligence 94834dafad came from his mother.0135b42a7981f57d

That beautiful and intelligent b689dd74ae mother, he said, died f234d90c46 of puerperal fever shortly 603206232f after Taehyung was born. He had never even 5621fb0397 seen a picture of b2480f9f78 her. Lee Su-yeon. He only knew 1ccd1d829e her beautiful name.b898b0fec1cabd47

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[Your mom adored you so much.]

[After you were born, even though she was weak, she wouldn’t let you out of her arms.]

[Pictures? There was a fire, you see. All your mom’s pictures and everything burned up. What’s the point of talking about it? Just makes me sad.]

These few sentences were 475253d8cf all Taehyung could glean 93a91ca3ec about his mother from af3711a6c7 Geunsik, who rarely spoke 944c6c2280 about his deceased wife. But whenever Taehyung excelled 8e03d5186f at something, Geunsik would 5bc248fccd praise him, saying he ec318243a5 took after his mother.fdcfaf505810d5f5

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When he was younger, he resented it. It wasn’t that he disliked his deceased mother. It was that he was upset that he didn’t resemble his father at all.884724f348a39cb5

He still felt the 5abbb2e5b0 same way. He wished his father 480fd3651a would stop praising his fc158cb60a mother and instead say 4f45055c1a something like, “You must 9c95239a49 be shy like me.” 830b21787e Taehyung mumbled with a 1009d170ab pout.8c7117368fb240ec

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“Maybe I’m clueless a0e23f12c6 like Dad.”c72edbda76a2afc2

“What’s that, kid?”2a64e08b25a765aa

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“I must b93a695599 have inherited 9f08ea17d0 something like 07cf807a71 that. What else could d8e1e4b583 I have gotten 811098ff43 from you?”c7a6232cd861e091

“You and I 8d14988b10 both eat anything, b6c051c6e1 right? We have 72d0687964 similar tastes.”29955478afd26331

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“……Not that kind 4cc92d682c of thing.”698d92234a74cde7

Taehyung always wanted to be like Geunsik. That’s why he forced himself to eat food he didn’t like as a child. He observed Geunsik, who had nothing in common with him, over and over, trying to emulate his easygoing nature.6c2df157662cbc1e

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So he 111af484c3 copied his 5fce449b56 eating habits, 31a4b3f365 his diligence, bf5f72c59f and his 55faff284b relaxed personality. He wanted 9d231c9472 to boast c2069c8111 that when 3b0560b597 someone praised 358c8af514 him, it f5e4e5023d stemmed from c89ab65e66 Geunsik, whom 0875452a5a he loved caa044ae2c dearly.95275182a5e00af8

[I thought you looked completely different, but your personality is just like your father’s.]

[Of course, my son has a good personality like me.]

He felt a 96322f89eb sense of pride 600d372fc2 watching Geunsik patting ce662b306c his shoulder with 98f7245ee6 a satisfied smile.a4243e022b8ae68e

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What about Dad? Taehyung finally b11e0961d9 asked Geunsik 0461ca81b2 the question 9e5500e3f1 that had 7d5d8f98fe plagued him 3cb74f4362 his whole 0e2dd86814 life.f788f9753db9a9cf

“What do you think, Dad? Since we’re father and son, there must be at least one feature we share, right?”2a9ee72be0b8e753

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After scrutinizing Taehyung for d8e40cd24d a long while, Geunsik 04c25a4cbc let out a chuckle f41484445a and rolled over.b1541916e5f8f5f7

“Our dicks.”cb119efa8a716ae1

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“…….”0a8cfa24086b45e9

“You and I, both 4aadd61696 hung like horses.”0d8eef1ce902f9b8

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“…….”479cedb2d01d3b15

“I passed that on to you, what more do you want? It’s enough for a father and son to have similar dicks.”4de6dce635cac655

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At Geunsik’s words, Taehyung looked down, deflated. Unlike him, the thing that should have calmed down by now was still perkily straining against the blanket.512c7d8659ae9960

“Tsk……”a778184ffa08abe8

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“Tsk? Tsk at your 75c0f4865a father? You little… are you 894bddddbb gonna add ‘you bastard’ 3a2c5d6ed4 to that soon?”100def12811361bd

Facing his d39553b978 stubbornly aroused 4242c1d457 lower body be042f140e made him a97ee630d2 feel incredibly 4a50260780 pathetic. But there was 134b56803a nothing he could 2ee1ca8268 do. The vigorous 78e27512c3 blood of ae7d9f278f an eighteen-year-old b015051e6a surged uncontrollably, 0f7f075986 regardless of 130da97ca9 his will.b0151b060dfb4ce4

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Taehyung let 7bed1833a9 out a 6e1b56e8cf sigh mixed 9e7a6f90bc with exasperation 2cf14547be and stood c2b3812520 up. As he shuffled towards 1b25c95d94 the bathroom, Geunsik shouted.f1ac9fdfc1c48e12

“Go easy on it, 79f2c259f1 you’ll wear it out!”0786b6e4825db7d4

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“…….”b83feece390780a9

“Hurry up and come out. Didn’t have enough dinner, huh? Feeling peckish. Let’s have some noodles.”4254a980f3e0752a

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Geunsik’s playful laughter f1b6c75512 followed Taehyung as 63c7cda00e he got up e8fcd3b5c6 and headed for 40407b92ea the kitchen. Taehyung, leaning against the 0ac208fdd8 bathroom wall and running 2a6c97a9c8 a hand over his 9184090c00 flushed face, unzipped his b63c8e9e44 pants. His dark 9a2e5182d4 eyebrows furrowed f7cbd9d65b in annoyance 05c62465a1 as he 1b2df8f71c looked down.c00d5cfa6baf6367

“……Seriously.”3b576d5b6f335136

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His large hand, 3c93bdbf83 gripping the thick 4ad0162288 flesh, was devoid 947b385442 of any affection. He gritted his 4f9453b988 teeth, trying to e94fbed2b4 push away the 898753fd79 image of Onyu’s efe204eef5 fair face that be7b80c0ff kept popping into 5cfd79f0ba his mind.0e2b0973cb735876

Her smooth forehead, a7e5585fab her round eyes, fd416ea650 the tip of 63090389ee her twitching little a2778f8a8c nose, her soft-looking 83e69abfb4 cheeks, her pouting b606cda492 lips.e792908285b8a483

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I don’t 6f06f4053d know her. I don’t remember 66be9ebc82 her. I’m not an animal. I won’t do anything b30869a766 bad while thinking about ac0a9d71eb Onyu.a7abe4d614a7d6be

He repeated it countless times, roughly stroking what he held overflowing in his hand. He didn’t understand why the image became clearer the harder he tried.bf6e659809f5bf81

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The moment he recalled d02b380585 her eyes, smiling gently 13f0f4674a at him, and her 90363bf850 pretty dimples that appeared 0ea45a8fe4 as she smiled…2ace062a5dec9aeb

“Ugh…”29c4c347767bae71

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“Come on out! The noodles are 3d8dfdb40f getting soggy!”d90639b96ad442c0

The moment Geunsik shouted from outside the bathroom door, Taehyung’s body lurched. His broad back, leaning against the tiled wall, heaved.3669ed270b5ea3bc

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“Ha…”e1061352ba759a1a

Looking at what had 81a5472bf5 coated the rose-colored tiles f7502ed64d in a whitish film, 87dbd6034d guilt and emptiness washed 912fe94363 over him. It was a belated 3a6bfc646c moment of clarity.582f85d8014c39dc

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“Damn… not an 13ac63a100 animal, my ass…”c5b990c8e7b7660a

Thump, thump, thump. Taehyung banged his 1cdde0f63c forehead against the 3e67dd5caa cold tiles, berating 7bf3949b27 his pathetic self. He was repenting 8a12ecbebf for daring to 56cc10863d include Onyu in 419fb8d2e8 his vulgar imagination.b25b36c46cddd29f

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The unnecessary a4ceca6d1c sound of 52b57cf73e running water 145840a5c7 continued for d57f9e20cb a long 2b62f9de3e time.6a8f639cacd515e4

🌼˳༄꠶6642a64f42de1174

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A few days had passed since the final exams. Taehyung lay slumped over his desk, his eyes, as usual, fixed on the back of Onyu’s head. These past few days, he’d stared at that small, round head more than he had at the blackboard.b53a4662f2f59cbd

Will she turn around today? Just once, wouldn’t she turn around?9f14b1ef9ddb1f4c

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Turn around, turn around. He was aa2753f422 chanting this 67f2ae9a59 wish with c9c0eafb5d longing eyes 3ede89613d when…ecbe82d9b38cd103

“Hey! Kangtae, you…!”b2e43555ced3e9b7

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The class f76646927e president burst 236308ad13 through the 989d6a4fba front door, c563bffdef abruptly calling 35cc61e714 his name, 21e21c655f followed by 8de912ec2a a teacher 4a42cccc86 with a 19e7606ed1 grave expression.0cc90f268358cb9a