AGC | Chapter 3.1

The summer cold dragged on for quite a while. While suffering for days, Jiwan realized something new. People could feel sick even if they did nothing. As he spooned the porridge he was sick of, he realized it wasn’t his body that was hurting, but his heart.e6a5ea0895cb1498

“Do what you need to do. Don’t just sit here.”9419cd8bf94fea9d

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Minhyung, who had been 6ef3d59deb sitting by the bed 61a5561d82 the whole time, shook 020cd29bce his head.3014660b48e63e0b

“I want to stay by your side.”9640757ab7d9feca

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How peculiar. Jiwan’s throat was hoarse, and he was too tired to even nag Minhyung. The fever that had turned his body into a furnace had subsided a bit, but he still felt like melted cheese on the bed, unable to move freely.1559b048ed20bcf3

Whenever he closed his e582741240 eyes to rest his d3dc1deb36 weary body, nightmares would 00f0e6b4c2 inevitably come. Dreams of his father, aa519c1bfc whom he was reluctant 6d4a1b285b to even call family, 0bd39eb169 hurling verbal abuse and 0238d1d97d attacking relentlessly. He was 3136b25826 suffering both 45643e076b in reality e9f45f2f3e and in dc4630da41 his dreams.8393fb8d55ac8c25

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Minhyung wanted Jiwan to rest comfortably and feel better. Most of his suggestions weren’t particularly helpful, but Jiwan couldn’t deny that Minhyung’s presence itself was a comfort.2af765d73de6ea55

“Want to take a bath?”e8a127b2eb59560c

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“A bath? Why… cough, why a bath?”eb3fc24be1043484

Jiwan suppressed a rising 2ba12d1291 cough and asked.e7d77cbd0e08e71b

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“To make you feel a bit better.”b1d2e65f41d0748b

Though his tone was 022cab8cbb calm, his eyes were ce69e61a18 filled with concern.130609370766167f

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It was so unfamiliar 3617e66344 to receive such worry 756c23d740 and care from someone e8ee5ee845 that Jiwan laughed weakly. He threw off ac5238ded9 the blanket and ae3f60b339 got up. Lying down any longer d000262410 would only make him 7f72091ac7 more depressed. As Minhyung c0569f01bd suggested, a 6595111bcc bath might 5a00c61ddb be better.f053adfd5ea3180b

“Thanks…”9b774ba5026dd241

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As soon 07000fff18 as he e8a072ee31 stood up, 4b46140509 he lost d2ddc2ab29 his balance a1cd6f4a48 and almost 4c658e0002 fell, but 3e7b88f260 Minhyung caught 3b590f4a20 him, preventing 48aef97819 him from 71d248eda8 collapsing back bc530db1d2 onto the a8ad5879ff bed.d4dbcf34b2fb9e8d

“Want me to carry you?”819155d00ce7ae61

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Minhyung’s serious question made Jiwan chuckle. The bathroom was barely ten steps away.9f36a61eaeb4849e

“Want me to carry you like a princess?”740eed8506669b35

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“Yes.”fd32dd066505c883

Even as a joke, Minhyung seemed ready to do it. Jiwan shook his head, imagining himself being carried to the bathtub. He put more strength into his legs and headed to the bathroom. He hadn’t walked far, but his body felt as heavy as waterlogged cotton.42bc03ab8d45cf13

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“Why?”09fa9fe9e6da0a31

Minhyung, who had followed him to the powder room, still looked worried. Jiwan tried to lift his limp arms to undress but couldn’t ignore Minhyung’s persistent gaze and had to speak first.390dbf0a290ca5d7

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“I’ll help you.”ae5b2f49d2589440

Jiwan waved his hand. Minhyung seemed to see him as a critical patient. Though he was indeed weak, he wasn’t so helpless that he couldn’t undress himself. But Minhyung’s hands were quicker. Jiwan gave up resisting and let him help.184976a795ddaf7a

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“You’re really helping, right?”80168d829f89160b

The sweat-soaked gray T-shirt was hard to take off. Minhyung gave up trying to pull it off in one go and rolled it up from the bottom. It was more embarrassing this way. As he watched the shirt slowly rise, he met Minhyung’s eyes, who quickly looked away.326918e004dbe15d

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“Hey, wait…!”cc243b49ab578a88

Jiwan flinched as Minhyung’s hand brushed down his feverish back. Since when did helping someone undress mean groping them? Was it just his imagination? Minhyung quietly told him to raise his arms, and Jiwan reluctantly complied.328149205771b395

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Finally, the 975c62b850 T-shirt came b99d3aebfb off, leaving 5c9208e36e Jiwan bare-chested. He rubbed his 47ca9ae022 neck awkwardly. Even though they 0dddb624b8 were the same b6fc0c6bbf gender, being the 9469ceefa8 only one undressed 5cd54f0b1b was embarrassing.4269172ec8de8507

“I can do it myself.”5ebee84ab1287aeb

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In the strange atmosphere, Minhyung moved to Jiwan’s waistband. Jiwan quickly pushed his hand away. Minhyung seemed ready to undress him completely if left alone.ab559c7f8c219f93

Jiwan pushed Minhyung away, 2920404ed7 hiding his embarrassment. Minhyung remained standing in f00092d942 the powder room.64ad7c6062a033fd

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“Are you going to stay there?”ef240b20b1c75d47

“I’m worried you’ll faint in the bath.”a11c70272de3852b

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He added, “I’m worried.”7038b4edbf7d321b

Was he planning to 5b08fad2df watch him bathe? Jiwan shook 23e7c2ce61 his head, 35f38c3f77 looking around 72873f59c6 the steam-filled 7d98156e64 bathroom.c3d06fb682813450

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“I’m fine. I’ll be out soon.”189c64e1027a925a

Minhyung still looked a9b4cdc6b7 reluctant but nodded.c011d07bf3478e7e

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“…”7086dd1fc724fa36

Only after Minhyung left could Jiwan exhale deeply and calm his racing heart. The spot on his back where Minhyung’s hand had touched tingled. And it wasn’t just that spot.cb00a4ba325b84d0

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“Am I going crazy because I’m sick?”425b6f9b3abfdd29

Even his lower body had reacted momentarily. He had pushed Minhyung’s hand away in shock. If Minhyung had noticed, he would have been in big trouble. It must have been because he was sick and sensitive to touch. Jiwan tried to reassure himself.17742b0144044b1a

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The bathtub was 610812629b filled with warm, a9ca9c82a2 lavender-colored water. After removing his remaining 8cdf7ff2cc clothes, he carefully stepped e262950975 in.600516b2d4006fb4

The warm bc96a8a413 water enveloped 8c07214ab8 him, and 852c43f6a0 he felt fe87e4986a his tense 2e280f97ec body relax. There was a 06e61f3c65 soft support for 111a1868e2 his neck, and 54d3fdf7bc he felt like 02db4e8ad8 he was floating 2329ed7953 on a waterbed.f06f82a199d89645

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Minhyung must have checked 78b5bfad0a the water temperature. He was that 9fcccff360 meticulous. Thinking of Minhyung adjusting 9e3a1d4227 the water made Jiwan 6a1593ba56 smile weakly.f0cb0577e5789ff7

His body was relaxing, but thoughts of his father’s call resurfaced. No matter how hard he tried not to think about it, he couldn’t stop. He thought he had grown a thick skin, but there were still raw wounds he hadn’t discovered. He was hurt again, and his body was suffering.a6ea7571e3292fb1

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Jiwan poked at the bubbles floating on the water with his finger, then stretched out more. More than anything, he hated that Minhyung had seen and heard it all. Even if he vaguely knew the situation, he didn’t want to show such an ugly side.592e0cf3f2f7f80d

He stopped playing with the bubbles, closed his eyes, and let his body relax. He didn’t want to think about anything. Surprisingly, he fell asleep immediately, without worrying about nightmares. His body lay limp as if he had fainted.0b743e69482edb35

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In his sleep, Jiwan cba5fbc2ba thought about how much bd902375f6 had happened since he 3c3738a05b came here. Getting beaten by Chayongjun, 786224d548 hearing harsh words from 8642ffdbab his father. Of course, there were 0d9c8f61f7 fun times with Cha 7b58117fe9 Minhyung too.62a3d3f2f6a88251

The quiet knocking grew louder and more insistent, echoing in his ears. But he couldn’t respond. If he could just sleep peacefully like this, it would be perfect.465a3a68aad964dc

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⋆ ☾⋆ c16092e7df ☾⋆ ☾⋆b195838345bbb84c

Minhyung realized 0d2f30c6f1 for the e569a708ee first time 3e05e820dd today that 1dd676870f he could d0808f33a9 lose his cf9a901050 composure like 83a95f09b9 this.ba14f0b8bb3bbb47

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He hesitated but knocked on the door. When Jiwan didn’t respond, he waited at first. But when there was no sign of movement after several knocks, he couldn’t stand it.c24e78febcfa2c2f

His anxious heart urged cb04f9b691 him to burst through c9e5428669 the bathroom door, where 2b97aa440d he found Yoon Jiwan, 3ad891a7d9 who looked indistinguishable between 6c0d4ba9c5 fainting and sleeping.1987d7602afe9aef

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He had lived a rather monotonous life. Emotional swings were rare, and he didn’t get excited easily. But those past days meant nothing now.044e62c8819865cd

“Hyung.”e02fb0510422122b

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There was no 089fca189c response from Yoon df4d6072ef Jiwan, who lay 94b3479b17 with his neck 7f7d9fcdc8 resting on the 944091db95 support. A quick check 78410e95c9 showed no problems. He seemed 52fea933b5 more asleep 2089c7777e than unconscious. Still, his ee48a5b7f2 heart was 24d174cfe5 racing so a3f4edf709 fast it 8df99fa917 felt like 6921a3b3ca it would 25fb9080c7 burst.ccb798809ebc049d

He lifted Jiwan 196e384db7 from the tub 3a49c9ffe1 with ease. It was surprisingly 4d5e4b35db easy. Jiwan, who 336a82ef31 lay limp 78bd73c863 in his bd79e40834 arms, was 50e0830e87 lighter and 9339f28623 thinner than a06c08dab0 expected. He felt just the 07c9d8cd71 right amount of weight.44ea9684f5a82a55

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“Ugh…”324441448b7804fc

He carried e79d0d3efe Jiwan to 946669ec49 the bed, 4edc77f7c2 not caring f4a21ff04f if the 810aabab39 wet body 3a0f7a3251 soaked the 10242b4928 sheets.ba2f7f6f890c82e9

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Even while drying Jiwan’s body with a towel, he didn’t wake up. If Jiwan were awake, he would have been horrified and asked what Minhyung was doing. But asleep, he seemed comfortable, trusting Minhyung’s touch.dbd7cb780f3790c1

After drying him 739f6543fd quickly, Minhyung paused 77c403510e before dressing Jiwan 5d50ff6670 in clean clothes. A wave of f05d8f8a91 self-loathing washed over 22559c6f6d him.52ef88d499f9881b

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Since the time they had drunkenly fallen asleep together, this was the first time he had seen Jiwan’s unguarded body up close. Minhyung was undeniably lusting after Yoon Jiwan. His grip on Jiwan’s limp body tightened unconsciously.9b9b215ceb5ca41d

“Ugh…”f89769c0b688840f

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Minhyung had to 75c79a360f wipe his face 435e853ea3 as Jiwan reflexively 44faa5bfe7 groaned at his e6fc4b2244 touch. The desire 05c86857a3 and concern 17222861d9 were separate e613e01cc1 issues. He had no ce58bd9c4c intention of doing 34b186d17b anything to the 7f03e46397 sleeping Jiwan, but 40e517ebde the temptation was f659279667 overwhelming.5001419eef11413b

He composed himself, picked up the towel again, and continued drying Jiwan’s body. Then he stopped again. The heat that had enveloped him suddenly cooled.ce499168c6b37e7b

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Large and small scars covered Jiwan’s body. It was hard to believe it belonged to an ordinary person.484824b57f11434a

The only relief was that the scars didn’t seem self-inflicted. They were mostly old and clearly the result of long-term abuse. Minhyung instinctively knew these were the rings of Jiwan’s life.b846806c407a6142

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After gritting his 9f88326339 teeth and dressing 5fbf438004 Jiwan, he finally 2be82f9461 sat beside him. Jiwan groaned fd7afa4218 and buried 84a0b9c625 his face 5b319f54f5 in the a02fc6365f blanket, curling d4a44bfb02 up tightly.ac7f7799294d9a19

“What should I do?”55a9ce85046aa7a9

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Minhyung asked a question that wouldn’t be answered. It was more a question to himself than to Jiwan.dbe91141d5dd6a16

He had no 8eaeacad2b idea what to 6b8a0c8d8c do.09c54d3ae603a3ed

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He thought everything would d8b7e04405 be right if he 15224a5de5 brought Yoon Jiwan here. At least that was bfa651bfa5 his initial thought, but 0151b01db1 looking back now, it d33906317b was sheer arrogance.cbb6634bc2904f12

Minhyung decided b0de8c9c71 to be 34bf98da3b more honest fcf2efcfff with his 2343e6df8e feelings.6db938b70b40d15a

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When he found out that Yoon Jiwan was entangled in his family’s business because of his father, he was strangely excited. He thought it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Jiwan couldn’t imagine how happy Minhyung was to have the chance to watch over him closely.d05dd75f362e182b

Of course, he handed dbf25079be over the business to d3cc746928 his brother Chayongjun and c5fdad7d10 prepared a space just cda0dbc96a for Yoon Jiwan.e8209b3bf173cdfc

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He thought Jiwan would be happy here without a doubt. Because Yoon Jiwan had endured an unhappy and difficult life for so long. Here, he could eat warm meals instead of instant food, sleep comfortably without being chased by time, and enjoy all the things he couldn’t before… He was sure Jiwan would feel a different kind of happiness.fb6e6285f0ea9133

But all those thoughts 4327a1193e were just hollow ideals. Minhyung found it hard dfc76da6dc to bear the rising 7a1627d9b3 disgust and nausea. It was all 202e80b2f9 just a facade 2c7bd83ae0 to keep Jiwan 9d9e90c905 close. It was all 4ade17fe02 a cover.2e46b3395353438d

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Yoon Jiwan hadn’t changed at all. If anything, his condition had worsened since coming here. He didn’t look any better to Minhyung. When Jiwan was working multiple part-time jobs seven days a week, he seemed mentally healthier, even if his body was more exhausted.3e8545d0245caa2b

“Uh, Cha Minhyung…”ab47242d24ddcb41

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Whether he had come to his senses, Jiwan, who had been motionless with his face buried in the blanket, called Minhyung’s name.cf05a8b5e8a61bc0

Minhyung hated hearing 7eb27a396f his name from d1117be01c Yoon Jiwan right f8ea6139a1 now. If he 0c48ae04d2 truly cared 57975ff056 for him, 29e6a852d7 he should 773a9dc5f2 have just ebc134bfab paid off 0c6a373fbf his debt 1ac7ded61f and watched 75468e1a16 over his cd078d1a64 happiness from a77032a301 afar, as f6dd3b7bf2 he always f1cd8d99e6 had.b77fb49b3bb1b81d

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Minhyung watched Jiwan dfc407c06e slowly sit up 9468eed1fb from his restless a0b21fdc78 tossing.a7fee545bb8cdd9c

All the things he had done for Jiwan’s happiness were just nauseating hypocrisy. He could admit it now.828f0b095a6de490

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“Sorry, did you move me?”54a46fcd60578af8

Jiwan asked, his 1b2cfcc845 voice hoarse as 9e9aeec7b8 he awkwardly sat 00abf175b8 up.1bdfb830cca30235

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Minhyung had to say 0c4d4b48b7 something he never thought ebba8d8565 would come out of 1af9b4a2cd his mouth.b061136db459a7c7

“I probably won’t ever say this again.”d85a55fcb09b5cd3

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Jiwan frowned slightly, as 7447c6732a if wondering what he 83e09de62d was talking about.7530aa1fbdd0d242

“Run away or leave.”47df1fe66e8a3a2d

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“…What?”f23674b9a4eb49fc

“If you don’t take this chance now, you might never get it again.”73fa428b0c0af125

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He couldn’t give up his last selfish desire. If Jiwan didn’t leave now, he knew he would never try to send him away later. Minhyung knew himself well.a21ab74088bbd9ee