CG | Chapter 1.6

Hearing Sean’s words, his mother hardened her expression and turned away. She placed bowls of macaroni salad and mashed potatoes on the table for the five of them, and as she brought the last dish, meatball spaghetti, she said,b84ab8927d8a3b20

“Don’t side with your father. We’re not going to see each other much longer anyway.”f433c1101b3b8d85

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“Don’t talk like that when the custody hasn’t been decided yet.”47a3c6c23753580d

“In case you forgot, you were the one who started cheating first. Let’s see whose side the judge takes.”abb498609b257117

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“Even if you get custody, they’ll all be adults in two years, so you won’t have much time to be involved.”2e170a24646eb3f1

As his mother finished ff6df9ba97 speaking, the table fell ce5bec20de silent. Spencer sighed with 8286c81db1 a weary expression, 21e51835fe and Scarlet, despite d1a9bd33f3 expecting it, seemed aad935200e shocked and scrunched a7e660d622 her nose as db4c787c9c she asked,2ce801fca54175b9

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“Is our family going to fall apart now? When my friends’ parents got divorced, I said it wouldn’t happen to us! I was confident that even though things were messy, we wouldn’t fall apart!”a3686a610a299c9e

Scarlet’s anger seemed to stem from that point. Watching her scream in a high-pitched voice, their mother gave her a look.00c35f59d0721875

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“Scarlet, is that something to say right now? But yes, we are getting a divorce. We’ve been talking about it for a while, and we decided there’s no point in maintaining the marriage anymore. You’re all almost adults now, and Sean will be working next year, so we’ve fulfilled our parental roles.”9619140dd90b27d5

Spencer, listening quietly, interjected.dd7b1d497e14cdac

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“It feels like Sean and Jenny did the parenting.”d531281518e2070f

For reference, Jenny was their babysitter from a young age. She was a kind person who even postponed her wedding to take care of the twins until they became adults. She was Sean’s first love, or rather, not his first love, and she would turn thirty this year after her birthday.265c03352963c757

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“Spencer, watch your mouth!”989ae42f5b2bccd0

Their mother scolded him and, as if she couldn’t take it anymore, took off her apron and handed the floor to their father.88be08f535a863db

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“You explain the rest. I’m exhausted from cooking while you were yelling and doing nothing.”3a400e2e7b70de3e

“What’s so exhausting about making something like meatball spaghetti?”bd445c598ef08b76

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“If it’s so easy, why don’t you make it?”223f4877eeb0d941

The bickering continued. Watching them, 0856cca99c Sean realized 86547fec89 that this 19ce9cfacf was what 33224c9b53 a relationship aba1da836c that had 983a964be6 ended looked 0091c1ec22 like. A relationship where 0eae4cb66f only anger poured 6b9e35cc69 out instead of b56bd96c3a good feelings and d01a0e759b memories. Once the 34c5256f77 fire burned 8830de8871 out, only 5e9dedb51c ashes remained, 2108f8af41 impossible to 42812169e6 grasp.6167e33bae2f7ce9

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Then what about Lane and me? We’re still close friends, but if we can’t maintain the same relationship because the person he likes is a guy…0b72b034b8233a8d

What should 8258acf4de I call ce31fc1627 this?08229082bb4c00ef

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“Who was it that made a fuss about how disgusting it tasted when I made it?”15c429696bfc012c

“If you’re feeding the kids, you should make it yourself. Of course, it won’t taste good if you buy frozen meatballs.”e2a78eff152dd9d2

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“I bought them from Whole Foods!”d1d504fd74c79c99

As the shouting continued, 6dee220b43 Scarlet and Spencer fell c0362c9cc6 silent. Lost in 34e19f622b thought about a97b56026c Lane, Sean 88b4369b50 realized it 828a478d6d was his 3d58fe8ab8 turn to 5163e4c08f intervene. As the older brother, dd832eff0c he had to handle 768aa21e39 this for his younger b47efcd1e9 siblings.ee68224835e72cab

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“Please calm down. You can have this conversation later between the two of you. You called us here about the divorce, so please explain.”3170cddcbdbff8ab

Though he was smiling, his voice had lowered. At Sean’s cool, deep voice, his father glanced at him, and his mother, slightly embarrassed, turned her gaze away. With her hands on her hips, she slowly sat down, and his father finally got to the point.654b64fa41d8c9e5

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“Since you’re on break, we decided it’s best to settle this now. Your mom will move to Manhattan, and I’ll find a place too. We’ll sell this house and move to a smaller one within a month.”16e35c17901887b6

“Spencer, Scarlet, since your school is here, we won’t move far. We’ll find a place nearby and take turns taking care of you. The final residence will be decided after the divorce settlement, but for now, your father and I have agreed to finalize it by the end of the year.”c615f19ae8496640

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Spencer, who had 0834abcff7 been listening with eeec5eff2e a face full 498116e33e of dissatisfaction, spoke e4bf3df61f up.80f693f85cd5445a

“If we’re staying in this area, can’t we just stay in this house? We’ve lived here our whole lives.”42312530ed283b2f

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Their mother rubbed her 850fd42c40 forehead as if tired.5ffc68eecaa67bf4

“Spencer, the economy is tough right now. Considering your tuition, it’s best to sell this house and minimize unnecessary expenses. Besides, with fewer family members, living in such a big place is a waste.”7b4d1ced491cafb8

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“Mom, you’re leaving us and going to New York, but you can’t even do this for us?”8e8a8639e068c5c0

“Honey, I’m not leaving you. If you want, of course, I’d like to stay with you. So let’s adjust things gradually.”acad17f7940a29c7

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Scarlet, who dc6dca9602 had been 198854b71a listening quietly, d0c68ef256 suddenly got 0abf3d0051 up and fee9176571 left. Their father 31f92275e0 glared at 85917335c8 their mother a83eeb7f2f and followed d5672db926 Scarlet, while 6903316b23 their mother df37e9a707 approached Spencer 5da9e1ff41 and hugged 403fa71407 him. Although the twins 7485ea3c8b generally had similar b3f1fcfc87 tastes, Scarlet was 2e83e9f2c6 closer to their dcbbed918f father, and Spencer 4bcc55823c was closer to 55ea9b3777 their mother.9bf7a25e79373a62

Sean…b678db1bc575a3f6

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He wasn’t in a position to follow anyone. He was the reliable eldest son and more of a middle manager expected to meet expectations. Even his friendship with Lane started because his parents told him to befriend him.69fcfdf1599f02f7

It seems 32c8111ec6 dinner is c967364f16 over. Deciding to set aside f7470048d1 portions for Scarlet and 4e112af208 his father, Sean used 1a50022f3d a wooden spatula to 4730eb7f73 scoop out their shares 70c0025037 and spoke to his 248e8154b7 mother.f8232062c172eb89

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“Can I stay in the dorm then?”33858b0f6ac4f9c7

At Sean’s question, his mother seemed to remember something she had forgotten and tapped her forehead. After a moment of contemplation, she finally spoke.de23f6139dee23cb

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“Do whatever you’re comfortable with. Or should we get you an apartment? Come to think of it, it’s awkward to find a place to stay during breaks, so that might be better. We could buy a studio, or if you prefer renting, we could afford a three-bedroom. Since we don’t know where you’ll work, renting might be better.”82c89156ad080e7b

Though it was natural as an adult, Sean wasn’t given the option to stay with his family. Staring at the single choice, he shrugged and smiled.672a2e76d45a0887

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“I’ll stay in the dorm for now. But when will you sell the house?”fffd2f8f0901fd50

“I want to sell it as soon as possible. This area always has a shortage of listings, so it’ll sell within a month once it’s on the market. Why do you ask?”bb51a1887733a04a

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“Since moving will make it harder to see Lane.”7e19e91a7254fc22

Saying it out loud, 4adb7a7a0d the realization hit him. The thought that it bcb0c508c9 would be even harder e71edbd07d to see Lane, whom 2be8bedf87 he already only saw 168360f17e on weekends due to 137044d3d9 their different living arrangements, 2e13038d5e made him uncomfortable. Everything was suddenly moving aacc9e49db quickly and unexpectedly.5fb9df631658dd0b

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Like a river f46159b8c0 swollen by rain, 295a3b3fbc the situation felt af8ca8c329 like a rapid 1b10bbe270 current changing everything. Without any e2900f7b96 warning or b2c7b9d4e0 time to 5b25c18a4a prepare, Sean fa967671f7 quietly clenched 0e61c0567a his fist.a29fb01642241362

“Oh, right.”622d40fb148bfd05

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The one e50c4d1e44 who pulled 740847bdbd him out f445cfe57e of the 90009b9a86 current was 8f6b44f81c the thought 4e60f71103 of Lane. Hearing his 2695bf7b46 name, his beb6388928 mother showed c7f3114a30 the brightest d58d468cc7 expression of 74516eff63 the evening 9124a3ddea and pondered.833991ebd4085347

“It’s good to stay close with Lane, so it’s better to give it some time, right? After graduating from college, even close relationships can become distant. So take this opportunity to strengthen your friendship. It’s good to keep the Surf family close.”8fb53745679d4574

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Though she said “good,” she meant “beneficial.” As an excellent civil lawyer, his mother was a popular figure with a guaranteed win rate, and she was just as shrewd and calculating. The help Sean received as Lane’s friend and the connections and opportunities his parents gained from parties they were invited to were countless.6371c5e27889bbe6

“Sean, can’t we just stay at Lane’s house? He has plenty of rooms.”3a9c1c69142a4129

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“Spencer.”62808ad52b750ad3

His mother gave him 0ec29f0f91 a stern look.c778f4e273d62bce

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“It’s not good to impose on others like that. We’re not a family that can’t afford it, so don’t even think about being a burden.”55e648eeb9def159

“Ugh, seriously.”500be7bfccb33715

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Spencer grumbled and pulled away from their mother’s embrace. As he was about to leave in frustration, Sean stopped him.63e84a16d61eb5b0

“Spencer, take the food to Letty and Dad. Bring your portion too.”df4a04cdccbbece4

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“How can I eat in this situation?”98f6392950f9d7a2

“Go on.”5811178c8c4eb976

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At Sean’s quiet urging, Spencer eventually gave in. With an annoyed stomp, he took the food Sean had set aside and went to his father and Scarlet, quickly returning. They were probably talking on the terrace. With an irritated gesture, Spencer took only some spaghetti and went upstairs. Only Sean and his mother remained at the table.2fa7d44e1d8e0f64

“Ugh, a storm blew through. Your dad never lets things go easily. It’s exhausting.”0565a49311564e54

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Watching his mother 33b54b7d84 put down her 501e5212be fork as if e7ea62b762 she had no aaa73f7923 appetite, Sean got e59fc0d472 up. From behind his 96700bea3e mother, who had c777fdf8c8 her face buried 021012ccf0 in her hands daf75812f5 and was silent, d8bea233d4 he poured warm dfab24e760 milk into a 19cd1fd21c cup like he 59a8b6620b did for Lane 77780402c1 and added cocoa 42eca1a45c powder. As the 0f9b8b6138 sweet scent 1b900d1478 spread, his f25205d948 mother turned fbc0642921 around.b74490a924f6e9ba

“Sean, you’re the only one I can count on.”ec625c4d90324823

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He handed her a 1d3e68378d mug, knowing she always 7991aed69c drank cocoa when tired. She took the mug, 1082f12732 sipped the cocoa, and eb8268455f remained silent before getting 213f7e7f7c up.06f12bfd5321446b

“You’ve worked hard. Let me know if you need more allowance, and I’ll go rest now. If there’s anything else, let’s talk tomorrow. Oh, isn’t tomorrow the day you go to the forest with Lane?”1ac5df58b2e58cf3

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Sean shrugged at her words. Normally, it would be, but after today’s bombshell announcement, he wasn’t sure if the plan would hold. They had been exploring the nearby forest every Sunday since elementary school. During breaks, they often went to various national parks with Lane’s parents, but they usually observed the forest next to Lane’s house on Sundays. Although they knew the place well by now, Lane loved being in the forest.00da78b77f2a01e5

“I’m not sure.”b6a7a98eb568c583

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“Oh, why? Did you two fight?”f855359dfa50488a

“No, it’s not that.”471f60f8a8392656

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Not wanting to elaborate, Sean kept his mouth shut. He didn’t want to make up an excuse like “He might get a girlfriend,” nor did he want to say “boyfriend.” His mother was conservative and showed strong aversion to such topics. Although she usually didn’t show it to others because it would tarnish her image, she revealed that side to her family, so he didn’t want to say anything that might reflect poorly on Lane.f7780305049d03bb

“I’m just tired.”1a769664eaaed5f8

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“That’s understandable. You haven’t had a break since vacation started, just training. If you want, you can quit right away.”0b76fbc99ba915f3

“No, I should at least finish this match.”3b6a70a4bbee8d06

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At Sean’s words, his mother nodded and got up. Watching her walk away after patting his shoulder, Sean rested his chin on the table, alone.f77a7e7d637bf950

The food had already be78ed9c48 gone cold.65fa69021f01b805

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Remembering how hungry bb32756ab0 he had been fc66c1e118 earlier, he served 08031a94f3 himself some spaghetti. Twirling it with 677e3c259b a fork, he 47608f50d5 took a bite, b861c62804 and it tasted f83cba82f2 just like it f877ce07ae always had. The bland tomato cbd7969d33 sauce his mother b59048f514 insisted on for f741eb7492 a low-sodium diet.7f5e697bdf0c4ac9

After one 9cfc641462 bite of 0f0c0254ca the cold bc75a46f62 spaghetti, his a4f64eb040 appetite disappeared. Guarding the empty table, 025875f576 he finally got up 16df27fadf and went to his d9459f9c05 room.5c64fbdb18c7426f

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.☘︎ ݁˖.☘︎ 936adef9d2 ݁˖.☘︎ ݁˖a26d896e5af323f8

Last night, Sean had a dream. With the daily training paused for the break, his body wasn’t as exhausted, so unlike usual when he would fall asleep as if fainting, he had a long dream.f1feb114a401f9be

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In the dream, Sean returned to his childhood. In the fragmented scenes, he was initially feeling very upset. He tried to grab his parents’ attention, which was entirely focused on his younger twin siblings, but he couldn’t reclaim them from the siblings who would cause trouble the moment they were out of sight.27e7ca1f2fc1488a

It was probably around that time that Lane moved in. It was the same in the dream. Rumors spread that the large, isolated property in the neighborhood, about a 30-minute walk away for a child, finally had an owner, and soon after, Lane transferred to Sean’s class. Even then, Lane had a small head covered messily with hair, but his clothes and fair skin were so pretty that no one teased him much.d7201b17bf62b327

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