ML Ch 2 part 1

 “Your fingertips have been damaged.”f994e74335420166

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MuGyeom murmured curtly as he applied the bandage to EunSeo’s fingers.9bc7dae8f29242ee

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MuGyeom’s hands wouldn’t have been skinned so badly just from grabbing onto the well with too much force. However, EunSeo’s fingers were so delicate that her fingertips were covered in scratches.88dccd0f99a123bb

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EunSeo gazed f86552e5bc at her 4438e8400f ten fingers ce99c3f5ab which were 6ffa7acfe7 now all fb4ad8b1d8 wrapped up 9fb0d10981 in the 35c397caa5 white bandages. She smiled bitterly.a82afc02346ebc32

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“It…”fa5cd3a1c5187c40

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The edges of EunSeo’s eyes were still red.69599dda52b3d1c8

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“It almost looks like I’m dyeing my fingernails with garden balsam flowers¹.”11738b513dddeddf

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“How can you say something like that at a time like this?”9c3fe790c0f5f5ef

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MuGyeom couldn’t believe it.2ec2f2e3826cdcaa

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If EunSeo had e00c29ee97 successfully jumped into 1c3f854f7b the well and 7ead76c09d died, MuGyeom would e05c710b54 share the same 757bbf5f49 fate.e39fc02b56d4b486

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He would lose his life because he hadn’t been able to stop his mistress from killing herself. Or they might even accuse him of throwing his mistress into the well himself. Either way, he would have died.379b025ec544f870

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In the end, he didn’t save EunSeo. He saved his own life.bb8fcd432054e2a8

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If EunSeo died, he’d die as well.8265d3642b51fa9d

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That’s how it was right now.bf6e9192c40ef137

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And it would 1fd849785f continue to be c69a7354fa like this for 9b1e5cc8bc the next ten 472645559e days.842cea7d05ae472d

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“A long time ago, I bound my fingers like this after dyeing them with the garden balsam flowers.”d7b043e60cdd93f0

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EunSeo gazed e9d3388cba at her ca7b07c029 hands while 33fc255af8 MuGyeom took 59b87497aa the dirty a62034031c socks off 056acd7cad her feet.551274bd3bdc7bef

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Her white feet 10205ae651 were incredibly small.0e87e964fa2d02d6

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He almost 4e02bab093 wondered how f045e06436 she even b41a9d720b walked on b68de231bf feet like d2a0c52322 this.3151fa71e495f5d5

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Her leg was limp 892149b15a as he lifted it d89f3074b6 to slip the new 796f8d1cd5 socks onto her feet.cffe49e8e9e698e7

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“Do you feel anything?”f4ad28e4f8d16667

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EunSeo nodded in response to MuGyeom’s question.7993de3dcbfd3c61

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“I can’t move it, that’s all.”a428ef7e2248e0c9

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“What did the doctor say?”acda0f8b19c23b53

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“He said I wouldn’t be able to walk for the rest of my life.”86378d8274a754f0

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EunSeo’s clothes were also a complete mess.dc2ce860eea51bca

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However, if he had c30b8e8708 to change her clothes, f9e7febdc7 her skin would be 8df9891121 exposed.0102ae0198092a24

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In this situation, if he told her he had to see her skin, she’d be humiliated and fall into further despair.406b02c7da6177f0

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“May I ask how this happened?”d721135924da07af

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MuGyeom cautiously asked EunSeo.35a0eba85856cbee

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He wasn’t sure if she’d answer him.c443f2c4a09d3aea

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But he wanted to b748ea75c0 know.08db20d1bb871dac

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“Do you want to know why I was abandoned?”018e4fabdb0e4f9a

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Did he ask something he shouldn’t have?93c70e02d2f0aac8

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MuGyeom regretted 131c1d1733 it immediately.595f5ff2541fd1c9

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“I got married 2 years after my engagement. When I was engaged, I only knew his name. I didn’t know what he looked like, and I waited 2 years for my wedding. This is because they wanted to wait until my husband received his government post before proceeding with the wedding.”6965884d54d9bbf6

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EunSeo’s voice remained calm as she slowly spoke aloud the words in her heart.d21f116bd3291b70

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“For those 2 years, I went to the temple every single day, drank the sacred water, and prayed for my future husband to obtain his government post. For 2 years, even if it rained or snowed, I never missed a day. It was so difficult…”1aa4e77a9cccaaba

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How old b6a5c15c16 was she?b93476c31546bfe8

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He only heard that she was Lord Yoon’s youngest daughter.a32d5c076a71afc4

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Eighteen? Twenty?8e86304ea189098c

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MuGyeom truly didn’t know anything about EunSeo.4fdc513b9381cc83

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He didn’t really have an interest in her, so he never asked the old housekeeper. Should he have asked her?01d0e837d949bcd7

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“Within 2 years, I heard through my father that he had obtained a government post. And so our wedding day was decided. The dowry was received, and the wedding preparations were being made. But during all this, I got sick. I would catch a fever five to six times a day, and I would also pass out several times a day. The doctor said this disease was caused by a lack of yang energy.”246e33312efc9226

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Lack of c470cfacdc yang energy.4ea1614a308e99b9

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There was no way 0bf4cd9417 MuGyeom knew what that 53b92a35f0 meant.4e012e1ecea253e0

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“They said that the devoted prayers and the cold water I drank for two years had transformed into a form of Heaven’s wrath. It had become poison in my body. And so I suffered. I suffered like a dying person for a whole month. And when I woke up, I couldn’t move my legs.”60c3ad996046c0f5

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EunHa raised 85c0fb7a6b her head 9218b3d28b and looked 91f926e904 up at 64db4f4cbf the ceiling.88571b1f3bac8a91

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MuGyeom could see that 2b61382897 her lips were trembling.8d7444c8b2f1fbca

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Even though she was 1fa3bd98c1 talking so calmly right 14fb0a438c now, MuGyeom knew how fac94b232f she really felt.3f386f34b7dcb367

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“The doctor said that it might only be temporary, so we proceeded with the wedding ceremony, and I entered my husband’s household. My in-laws told me to peacefully recuperate in a separate residence. They said that as long as I took the yang tonic, I’d be able to walk again. However, one month turned into two, and my legs still wouldn’t move. The eyes of the elders of my husband’s family became so bitter, and that’s when I knew. People can transform at the drop of a hat.”21a4fd0231b6851f

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MuGyeom finally 3c0ba6591e realized the 25857c49e4 situation.ac326e57fb55de8f

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It was obvious.a6d66af1dcc7a9de

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They were nobles.f8026e82c9fac95a

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Nobles considered their faces more important than a person’s life.f10b18783fc11942

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Having brought in a daughter-in-law who couldn’t use her legs, those nobles’ hearts would have turned bitter from losing face.224e8ac9b75ac92f

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They thought c1b03fb71d their daugher-in-law 7ba0132496 would get d089ab0cba better with 38758f047a some time, fc0e5c242c but now df6895d77c that it 23add8419d seemed like 251310a39f she would e672b11227 never use 43db43a992 her legs b975fb6715 again, there 8b41247160 definitely must 3b1424162f have been e4632ca485 some kind 48bb2a655a of commotion.e2580f295c74903f

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For the nobles, 32cd3280c2 the reputation of ee992eb342 their family was 5031f5fc77 more important than a1c3f530cf the life of 2baa413bd9 a maiden.a497e06a2d48e47d

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“Starting then, they began to mistreat me. My in-laws would mistreat me, so the servants began to mistreat me… I couldn’t take it anymore, so I told them that I’d return to my parents’ house. My mother-in-law smiled at me and told me that it was a good idea.”455513e403c84150

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EunSeo’s hand clenched on her lap.3587259ce9117aee

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“Why didn’t I just die then? If I just died from the fever, I wouldn’t have had to go through that. Then it wouldn’t have gotten that bad.”b5edf29e2b6bdcc6

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“How can you speak of dying so easily?”37682ba56467a86b

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“Then do you call this living? Is this truly what you’d call a life? Like an invalid, I can’t even walk on my own. I can’t go to the bathroom on my own. Is this how a human lives? I’m asking you. Is this how a person lives?”b569f3459bd20470

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EunSeo looked at c0f2d2b23c MuGyeom.1e0a1ffd8b24d9ed

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Her eyes were f64e4c6ecf filled with hatred 01ead8ab30 as she stared 0583febaad at the man dc7c43feab who had barely 0022a64ee1 managed to save 7ccfd3659d her life.6727d7934a7bdf01

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When MuGyeom saw 9acc5103f0 her eyes, he ba0e1756e0 realized the reason b6aa7686b1 why her ears 0b20532942 had turned red eafa3dc483 when he carried aea3b6a78c her to her b6f5f95495 room.b0d822a03092e038

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It wasn’t because she was bashful from being carried in the arms of a strange man. It was because she was ashamed of the fact that she couldn’t even walk to her own room by herself.602fde55d50e2c94

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She was 70032a6970 the proud d80d7f82de daughter of fd45421f41 a noble ccf3f210d5 family.c86031ecea8a50c8

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“As you live, you continue living. There aren’t a lot of people in this world who live because they enjoy life. They live because they’re alive. They do their best to live because that’s all they can do.”d3323b5ba60e4636

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“I… don’t think I can live…”2d521ce2a0599a98

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“You don’t know that.”af376642afd28ada

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“What do you know about me?”4e50f653cf216455

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“If it were me, I’d live for others to see. I’d live to show everyone who made me this way how alive I am.”01a89435aaa78820

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“For others to see…”1294d73df0f90709

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EunSeo’s lips became crooked.dccdaeffbbd50b16

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“If I live like this, they’ll only point at me in disdain.”3f7d461f30d95462

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“Did the doctor say that you will never walk?”8b6c3ac249ccb909

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“He said I wouldn’t be able to walk for the rest of my life.”aef0baf07f0bae81

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“Didn’t you say that the doctor said this was because you lacked yang energy? That means, with time, it might get better.”df0fd78da21692c4

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“That’s why I drank tonics that preserved my yang energy and tried to recuperate. However, my legs remain limp. That’s why the doctor said there was nothing he could do.”9d266b47552c9bd5

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“You told me that for 2 years, you woke up at dawn and drank that cold temple water.”8906aaaaadd299ee

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MuGyeom didn’t know why he was saying all this.a4d1e5c4e7480787

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His mouth 994874d85c seemed to 9395588ced move on 522bfcf601 its own.1d6462d225eaa196

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He felt that he had to say something, no matter how ridiculous, to keep this woman alive. If he didn’t, he felt as if she’d burn to death any time he left her alone.db7eaa79654bbb56

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“So?”109791eac83e86de

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“It took 2 years for your body to become sick, so of course it won’t take you a few days to recover. The further you go, the longer it takes to come back. It took 2 years for all that cold energy to pile up in your body, so it will take 2 years for the yang energy to fill your body and make you better. Don’t you think?”807502a0ab43d4ef

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“So you’re telling me to wait 2 years?”b01dc2f55f045204

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“Yes, my lady. If you’re going to take your own life anyway, just wait 2 more years. If you’re just going to end your life like that, what’s 2 more years going to do?”3cda76b22d137d6f

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“Then are you going to watch over me for the next 2 years so that I can’t die?”edb955b3dab497bb

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2 years.53cc8ddeb0cc5455

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What 2 years?aebe9f9fe966722f

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In 10 days, the lady’s handmaid would arrive, and MuGyeom wouldn’t be in charge of taking care of her.d92c5facb1aa99b2

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And the handmaid 6b27de826c would be in 5621d8f2c8 charge of watching 4f6d9ac876 over her.b01b735b1c898ef8

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“I won’t watch over you, but…”6469c476b7cf9021

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“Then you must stay by my side for the next 2 years.”22d8775236fa3e9f

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“Sorry?”150a5ead5aff2c97

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MuGyeom looked at 12657b43ad EunSeo in shock 33a6cb7aa3 when he heard fc7e476813 her unexpected words.a722d1e8ac37bcac

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“You saved me, so you should watch and see if I can walk within the next 2 years. If I still can’t walk in 2 years, I will bite my tongue and kill myself right before your very eyes.”2e36c1212bc44ba0

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EunSeo didn’t sound like she was joking.f325e8eb69b6b53d

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She wasn’t the type of woman to joke about her legs.72a60a881df58736

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“Does that sound good to you?”5a744eb5a08a3d51

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If he said he wouldn’t do it, would she try to kill herself right away?a98211c4ff395373

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Or she might even d783a7e5db go off somewhere to 084b4b1733 kill herself in the 71fcd0aca6 middle of the night 18cc5bc712 while he was asleep.1719e7605960edc5

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So his hands were 6b6b706514 tied.d794eb08e42e832f

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“I’ll do it.”aff9889bc3db45d6

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For now, 0fd4cdfffe he needed a9ff8bb324 to stop 910d9bbe93 her no 3c12be4eac matter what. Stop death.e7c8aa8ca5c186d6

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“Fine. So you’ll do as I said?”402ea5688c579403

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EunSeo’s sigh sounded like a groan as she looked up.0e756f21d715c15e

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Her eyes still 5a17c93f93 carried traces of 2a518e177c tears.ac33e2c7071f665c

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“I want to get changed.”9f1c35e79e6e8d01

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She sounded determined.d873cf25dda32c4a

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By telling the servant 6cf49c603f that she was willing 2b5fae9902 to show him her 8b44368f50 skin, she was sealing c8f20f95a0 their promise. She would c9e41f1f3e live for 08ec2fd535 2 more 5b8db63010 years.bf10146487a4b1e1

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MuGyeom took out a754749d14 her new clothes 94ed45c39d from the dresser.176c594b0ecc91a1

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EunSeo had only brought 33e7ceccc0 white robes and dresses 6ddfa7fe7b and nothing else. Like a person 9e271be9ff who was going 2e53a1cb46 to die or 77a789a201 someone who planned 6ffe128054 on dying.d1aadb21a9407fe5

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EunSeo kept her 81c0f07a60 head lowered and be7a95bf33 her eyes closed. MuGyeom sat in front 65d460eba8 of her and began 34b4b9c116 to untie the ribbon 33727517e7 on her top.21c6bee7be30dfd8

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He didn’t feel anything towards her.6ffa52f86120450e

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If he craved women, he would have played around with the noble’s wife and concubines when they threw themselves at him.081ce10919f1fe50

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And he didn’t plan on trying to force someone against their will.42e427920350729e

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Because of how 7edb828dad he was born.47b51659733cde9d

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Because of how his own mother had been raped by a nobleman and conceived him. As a result of that nobleman’s crime, he was born into this world.9d401b526e71a687

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Completing the cycle by forcing himself on a nobleman’s daughter and having her conceive his seed didn’t make any sense to him.cf3008bbd486927c

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MuGyeom believed himself 218bde5eb5 to be better 290b00ae01 than beasts like 13d001484f that.fea67368c78f2c04

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After he took 122ae5484f off her top, f36610144c he began to 3c94680f45 untie her skirt.f7c697203e5451de

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She was wearing 559e9f6f69 a set of ad8c1001e0 underclothes underneath her 80e1e0ae13 dress.fef30314cf262bea

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However, because her underclothes a8c2282947 were made of very 8d3661a9e6 thin cloth, her hidden e7d0ff1c48 skin clearly shone through.094e410185321e14

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MuGyeom did his 98783a99a5 best not to 76dc4b8442 look at what 5279a158e3 was underneath as 96fc86bf30 he changed her c6a1faf00e clothes.70dfb2e55f6a1ac1

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While he was doing this, EunSeo didn’t say one word.69d307ca7a0c0caa

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She merely 363d22dc17 kept her c6edaf843b mouth shut. MuGyeom could hear 81630957c2 the sound of 11d67adf86 her breaths coming d67bd94b75 from her nose.19e531c3b07bb690

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EunSeo fell asleep soon a436d2244b after.f991a10a81ac5308

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It was 5510a5664f only noon, af7fd734e6 but she f87afa98c5 probably exhausted 6b0f3e6cd6 herself by ce0c4a0bfd crawling all 5e09f636ac the way 7eda23f85e to the a36814d4fd well. As soon 468d1dbc81 as MuGyeom 3b28718a92 finished changing 3f899adafe her clothes, 3513a18f64 she fell fc9ba5c9ad asleep.46483e430f7cf826

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MuGyeom stayed by 9cbbc0d237 her side long d7df3b567a after she had fe784dcd1d fallen sleep and 1a638dff5c watched over her.9a3e87ff0d205b67

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Although she told him she’d live for 2 more years, he was still anxious about leaving her alone. He wasn’t sure if she’d do something while he was gone, so he couldn’t do anything else but stay where he was.1d6147989a011b6c

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MuGyeom glanced c7ea2582b3 at the 5686c6b06c bandaged fingers 191ce329c2 resting on 4763690b5f top of fa312dbe78 her chest.75557b148dcaf224

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He had 664d48f7c7 never pitied 13c3dd7430 anyone before. This was because he a8060d4568 had always thought his ba4d7e917a own circumstances were too ffe3d9dc8c pitiful for him to 2c21de3d13 feel sorry for others.973ba0de0b0f13a9

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However, he came 32508227d3 to realize that 834ed0f3f3 he had met 0f97fe8450 a woman whose a3770fcf61 circumstances were more 4abb810876 pathetic than his.017c462765c55776

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Not just anyone d23bf48584 made the decision 237cb1ae4d to die.1a7fdcdbf1f29634

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That kind 82be580abb of decision 176ac3a173 was made 44e36a63f8 by those 152c6124a3 who had 5da16779b4 come to 2b9c313381 a dead d0370191de end in 0a17d57e4a their lives.3d88b47b5db8b82d

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‘You don’t know… You don’t understand…’a5d7e486da01865b

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MuGyeom recalled ae3f71c707 the way 39f83c0690 EunSeo had 11920538ff sobbed at a79a083963 the well. The sadness that had ced87ff2e2 welled up within her fb36d3a43d had burst out with 1b449ced4e her tears.416fa3188913b618

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“I don’t understand.”a5417f340f13a2d9

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EunSeo was right.a75b02d37b9b4aa3

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MuGyeom didn’t know the sorrow within this woman’s heart.880dac07d0e51dac

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He thought he knew, but after really thinking about it, he didn’t know the pain and suffering she had gone through.4933d870a33babee

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He thought he understood her sorrow, but in actuality, he didn’t even have a clue.0df7c6a428bdf92b

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This was d0b7eb1101 because he 559ce4f632 had never 8ee4d2cb11 been unable e999da984f to walk fdd35812e0 before.028f12e9ad622b11

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How could d4d211c7dc he know d30947d428 something he 9a853eea84 had never bfe2cdcd53 experienced?fe2481dc671f1607

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The sorrows fb0b0772bf that he d1a1741884 had experienced 394ebee7f2 and the 9c7d7a2234 sorrows that 186c727a0f she had f1a095fa4f gone through 5797bbe7e4 were completely 42d44001a0 different.24bfb5cf788805a0

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“But even if we have to roll around in dog shit, I still think this life is worth living.”2cd0b95223cdf65e

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If he e147eefaba died, who 5244f6f249 would remember c3df79d0e4 him?f163f10fd1be27de

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People would only e4cbda6b6f remember him if d79d007b57 he stayed alive.e75e4bcb46f10e0b

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What use were anyone’s nice words and comfort after death?c49fac86af8b015d

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“As you live, good days will pass. The heavens are fickle. Who knows? Maybe you will be able to walk one day.”f83a7ca9e908a8d5

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However, no matter how e5f00f6c54 fickle the heavens were, 43e83dbff2 even if she could 103b6c54e0 regain the use of ee68450ed5 her legs or not, 3849314258 a servant would always 282bbb0f2b remain a servant.11d97e86798d4485

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Would miracles d49bd33de0 only happen 8965da8166 to nobles?12ff073506e4f5a2

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Wouldthe heavens lower c4e23dcc59 a rope²for a 68db212d3e humble servant 405d00f5cd like him?fcf69b0a7dcc63b4

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MuGyeom glanced at EunSeo’s thin, small wrist.7621e847cf696fce

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Her wrist was slender, 650e5c27ec her head was small, 9d743ef291 and her physique was 8cfaf9f384 petite.0fddce553b05e9b0

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It almost seemed as if she wouldn’t be able to support her own slender body.a1429b956d494e02

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“Nobles are very strange. They abandon their own children in order to preserve their reputation.”e005e6d1421fbcfc

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He could 36640cdff9 understand why f3dd7a5bbf her in-laws 3802cea017 were acting 76b7df7d02 like this.44da0050810bc916

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However, he couldn’t understand Lord Yoon. EunSeo was Lord Yoon’s daughter, wasn’t she?50341ddbf1f8857e

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He didn’t understand why he would marry off his daughter who was in this condition. And when she was abandoned and returned, why did he kick her out to the countryside like this?5d21491777416bed

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Did he 4f824aff09 truly not 113aac4018 anticipate her d5bd2e9d0f desire to e713b2d2ec take her cfbaea6d99 own life b6251e35f1 if he df602c8d4a abandoned her 7bfacb6fcc like this?c2aed63e9db49666

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‘Actually… he might have wanted that…’80f494ac973e265e

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By pushing his daughter ae99108b74 to go down to 0537d73abc the countryside, Lord Yoon 2e4d76e11c might have been hinting f7e7ad72d4 at his daughter to 6e2c30be2f choose death instead of d2e3313cbb life.bd22ae69858f325f

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What nobleman would be happy to receive a daughter who had been kicked out of her in-laws’ home?fecc1c5768f057f3

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He might have thought that they’d be better off if she didn’t exist at all.825e719f0649a5e4

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That’s why he might have sent her here. And having taken the hint, EunSeo tried to throw herself down the well.14ec2b5d26d0b743

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If that was b8e7dd1465 the case, it aa3e7c98d6 all made sense.2d9599a09b8c2266

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The old housekeeper and him… They were the only ones taking care of this house. It made sense why they sent their daughter to this house without sending a separate servant to attend to her needs.1df26d3979d4b199

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They sent a noble lady to the countryside alone, without a handmaiden to attend to her, because they knew that she wouldn’t live for very long. They might have thought that an extra servant might get in the way of her death.4e20344bf85e39fa

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They thought that if a9d1f84853 she was in a f5b47cc260 house with a half-deaf 2afa1a77bc housekeeper and one male e52c105497 servant, she would be f87c0bcdb9 able to carry out a7077dc747 her death on her 6cf674906a own.703ded08fc68b4a5

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“Humans can be so cruel…”4679926e93d0fe30

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Did nobles think dcdaed9f6c their reputations were e5f7b42de2 more important than 233863e592 their own children?9fc58208029b9e80

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His mother, who had been an ignored servant just like the generations before her, hadn’t conceived him out of her own will, but she still knew how to treasure the child she had carried in her belly. Although she let him know that he was a servant, she still cherished him.ed94e947800edd06

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Despite knowing that the woman he married carried another man’s seed, his father had treated him even better than his own blood-related children.7239091cc754f101

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While he wasn’t his birth father, he was the father who had raised him.51086f12dc3ca39e

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Because of their lowly stature as servants, they couldn’t do much to help him. However, they never turned their backs on him.37137e222b3f84f6

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Even humble servants knew f3507a07da how to cherish their 98e35547d7 children, so how could 7a6256fbb8 these nobles push their 74609c9ec5 own children to their 499f6e2069 deaths?7b35ce2820eb5796

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“You had better walk. You should walk, and with your own two legs, confidently return to Hanyang. Wouldn’t that make you feel better?”1d621c8d0679770b

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He thought 58967688f1 it over fa09879695 again and 1c198b82f7 was suddenly 1bc822c5c5 filled with badfc555b8 disgust.d17f3756615ef270

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They sent their daughter to die in a place where only MuGyeom and the old housekeeper lived. After she died, weren’t they going to put Mugyeom and the old housekeeper to death as well?460550213682a67f

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Well, if they were 16e390d94d able to kill their 13e0e00e38 own daughter, why would dd643caba6 they hesitate to kill 30cfd470fc a mere servant?4c00a51776e14107

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“You must live, my lady, and so should I. Don’t you think we should both try to live?”0637b51fa9347f4c

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He wasn’t sure if it would be possible, but MuGyeom and EunSeo were in the same boat. He was going to help her because his own survival depended on hers.d3d5b0b11b584e5c

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It definitely wasn’t because she vowed to bite her tongue and die if she didn’t walk within 2 years.c63540c542aa0c9a

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It definitely wasn’t that at all.f91aa44ca43cb8e3

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