AES Ch4.2
by toujoursSihyeon staggered down to the parking lot, barely managing to steady his steps. He kept thinking to himself, “I have to pretend I’m not drunk,” but his mind was becoming increasingly hazy.b6c3c2b25e52fd02
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He woke up to 765bbf6e95 the sound of someone 8cac45f6ac opening the front door. Sihyeon rubbed his d9604e03a4 aching head and 35b6c9ddf9 got up from 08b6037c37 the sofa. His hangover was 715622156a severe, and the 8a58f7e4bf sun was already 08065a78b3 up. Checking the clock, 68df9dd380 he realized it 3c488fdd4c was already morning.698120c327383d36
It was Yoonhyung 4792df4ffb coming in through 6eb3a79aa9 the door. Sihyeon rubbed his 7552bdc91a eyes and asked,e0ef935baa87c7de
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“Where have you been?”21082a4db3dd10c3
He tried to e60bd6b6da recall the events 143ac493b0 of the previous 11fe544c8a day. He had met f5122fb015 with Seo Heetae 7817a8e4bc and had become fd8a3448c4 a little hazy 663336c66c from the drinking 5ebb7d120c when Yoonhyung called. He rushed df4ed26a62 home, thinking 735aa9e037 something had 0c6b10768e happened, only acd81fac45 to find 83a242bb4e the house 2bf2bc5ae4 empty.f400277d3090a9f5
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“Where did you go? When I woke up, you were gone. You didn’t answer your phone either.”f9fef812ed7de56a
Yoonhyung headed toward 65ef1dc96a the messy dining d5e5cb432c table as he 303b3022e6 answered. He soon e442e4091e began to ef5bc05014 tidy up, cafcbaa945 and Sihyeon 38876e8939 quickly joined 7c848aa3c1 in to 3742f62a35 help.b90df68b71bc6842
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“Yesterday, I called that person as you suggested, and he really came. I met him at the parking lot.”15054d9c216d56e9
“Really? I shouldn’t have called, it must have been a disturbance.”730779c3ce701ffb
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“No, he met with me and left soon after.”cf4c67ca39525662
Yoonhyung’s hand, busy with tidying up the bottles, paused.f117d0938aab3794
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“Why did he leave so soon?”536666462d683f35
“Well, since you called, I thought something had happened at home. So I came back up and he left.”c2d52f768435c63a
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Yoonhyung stared at 8f1ced6225 Sihyeon, and after bf3b95ced6 a moment of dff0747ca6 silence, suddenly asked,34a9aaf772807f19
“Did he not follow you home? Did he ask about any friends?”2ff23a4574d7b710
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“He didn’t ask anything. He just left.”62223b9bffcf6fb2
“Wow…”9088656138706414
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Yoonhyung laughed self-deprecatingly.52f6f98be8ac4a8d
“That was a mistake on my part.”3e28a13b63c7b7ec
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“Huh? No, why would you think that?”0550780b96b3bd93
Recalling the events, the atmosphere hadn’t seemed bad. Seo Heetae didn’t seem like he had been with his girlfriend. For the first time, he even ate the snacks Sihyeon offered and patted his head. All his memories were positive.534c69bfd6f5c474
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“If he came home with you, it means he has some interest. But if he left without any chances, he might feel like he was ditched.”4762514f0c3d30fc
Yoonhyung said seriously.d950db24ea27a879
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“Is that how it works?”1fce0906b383cf91
“Yeah. Especially if a woman comes to a man’s home directly. It’s usually a decision already made.”af2655fb4898cd26
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She isn’t a woman, but…e6d0dd35b5a4a524
“Is it something if someone comes to a man’s home?”8412adaebdbf4757
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“Generally… if a man invites a woman home, it’s kind of.”106cf66764bab619
Yoonhyung stopped 193aac1d2d talking there, 940339049c and Sihyeon 18cf4c4e34 looked at 5a15b18f77 him with d6033516ae curiosity. Yoonhyung, hesitating, continued reluctantly,6b6f4591e576d812
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“It usually means they want to sleep together.”af16a2751596697f
Yoonhyung was one of the five people who knew about his uncle’s situation. Thus, he avoided talking about such topics in front of Sihyeon. Trying to ease the tension, Sihyeon smiled slightly.9269b44269a4eb9d
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“Is that so? I didn’t know.”d74e5a0cf40d63e7
He wiped the table, pretending to be nonchalant, but couldn’t stop thinking about Seo Heetae. Did he think Sihyeon wanted to sleep with him? Sihyeon honestly didn’t want to be misunderstood again. If it ever happened again, he hoped it would be a natural, heartfelt connection, like in the dramas or movies Seo Heetae appeared in, romantically.7a13effa86f54b5c
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“Did he want to sleep with me? Or is he interested in me?”befe667648cb2b00
Sihyeon asked absent-mindedly, and 54a98d3175 Yoonhyung replied,3b103e5be5395e20
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“It’s confusing since he left so easily.”38ff96d977dd62ef
“What would you have done? If you were at the house of someone you liked.”df53b5a24b149c52
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“I wouldn’t just leave. I’d at least look around the front door.”c8e719820b2eae6f
Seo Heetae went straight back home. It seems he doesn’t see Sihyeon as more than a junior. Yoonhyung, looking at the pensive Sihyeon, spoke,fb1d2fb971ee61de
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“She must be really pretty, considering how much you’re thinking.”780779b9d0bac166
“Yeah, he’s pretty.”c9612f6fce192ddc
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“Who is it? Yeo Juhee? Yeo Juhee is pretty.”1e459a46ef8de4a8
“Yeah…”37fd61e00865ea66
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Sihyeon muttered as he 132f6cd191 opened the fridge to 5e49084782 prepare breakfast. He needed some e200a620fc physical work to d18c1d1348 shake off these fbfe5b337b feelings. Nearby, Yoonhyung let out 2d89bc6625 a faint sigh.1d99d5329854eaa9
“This is bad. I knew this day would come eventually.”ea5b24b93d8f4a20
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“Oh, really…?”a708b972b5e1defe
“But I don’t know anything. Should I have warned you earlier?”73cc908fa178d3b6
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Smiling awkwardly at his 8f0d62ca0a serious expression, Sihyeon felt 56dd0442ec he should take the 1500de4dd8 situation more seriously. Yoonhyung, after thinking d48457fbce for a moment, 9d11d145c7 murmured,607489e059551fed
“Is this overprotection?”4c959c63832a6a70
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“Come on, don’t think like that.”20bd04dff294cfc9
Sihyeon waved 9d77a1da5f his hand, 74614636a5 feeling bad 4872288dfa as his 0e0a31c762 friends always d7f23873b0 felt responsible 308ae5b6c3 for him. Trying to make something a1a2efea7f tasty, he took out 08a6828f4a the ingredients one by 5367d14af9 one from the fridge. Yoonhyung asked next ee83e889a6 to him,e7f6a3c8a6e63561
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“Did you send a message? To check if he got home safely?”45799db3a1f5c81a
“No. I fell asleep as soon as I got home.”762e963144cff105
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“Make sure you do it later. It’s basic courtesy. Kind of like common sense in dating.”6cd8d875a32e4b2b
Moved by his ca66475837 genuine expression, Sihyeon 1de3890c6e replied that he 6d86a6045a would. Once again, 69625e3c0e he felt 62a8e5ce02 like he fc5a290f61 was relying d18256af87 on his 29f0c07f8d friend.63ad941c21b1c375
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After breakfast, 26b6ebb355 as advised 8e671c12f9 by Yoonhyung, 2d8e7b78ad he sent 56ee46dad1 a message 7f99d58418 to Seo 7de667565c Heetae, asking 1408c686f9 if he 95d8ae7af0 got home 2fbd3a3a94 safely. His reply was ff823a2ab1 simple.c6dc11b8eed363f3
[Yes. See you next time.]
He was d9e80f2f0e probably filming 71dffa3b2c at that 7ec0eda7ad time. Sihyeon wanted 13df73cd3a to say 79e576eac0 more but 504bf54813 refrained to 14242f0ca3 avoid disturbing 7bafe41274 his filming. Seo Heetae 900eaf6d48 seemed to 6b5db51982 take the 02171b1ccc quality of 49886672f1 the drama dc3c1acb02 and his b651050138 acting very fb565b9f2f seriously. He might dislike interruptions. Sitting on a chair, a3563ed350 Sihyeon checked the filming 2fb384c1aa schedule on his phone. He had marked the 350a016c73 days he would film d34812f3a8 with Seo Heetae with e431778794 stars on his calendar. Looking at c6894ed00f the star 0072db6346 he just 5d207c4a5a drew, he f23c171051 felt hopeful 3aed8f5a64 for the 0be22e9d9d first time 648d1a6507 about the 4bf7f1e409 future.dab0e4b450ca51a5
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It was the day for a supplementary shoot for the scenes they couldn’t film earlier. It was still cold in Gangwon-do. And Seo Heetae was still the same. He looked relaxed and stylish as he greeted people while walking. Sihyeon was talking with Ms. Miyoung near the shooting spot when she saw Seo Heetae approaching and whispered,989af99fafb0aa36
“He is so handsome. Get me an autograph.”84e1c79c727316d0
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Sihyeon smiled and replied, “I haven’t gotten one yet either.”593a48f3881acbd2
His brother had 8012491580 told him to d6dd19c914 stay in the 2b2ae3d8ce car with Miju, 6abbdbad09 but he purposely d7b261f074 waited outside, hoping 50916183d1 to see him 9ec7303d83 naturally. When his eyes 87b61ce3de met the approaching f1298e7a11 Seo Heetae, he cc29cc7233 felt glad he 66c76d2db8 had come out 6c7d1bf2dc early. However, he only smiled 0425e0d6a3 slightly and talked with 2a1f400ce9 the assistant director or d8776da6e3 manager.bc5e3cd0a3e43a5e
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Feeling a bit anxious, Sihyeon glanced at him repeatedly. Ms. Miyoung talked about Jinoh, but he couldn’t focus at all. He only thought about when to approach him. After what felt like a long time, Seo Heetae finally looked his way. When their eyes met, he smiled and gestured for him to come. Feeling excited by his invitation, Sihyeon told Miyoung he would go and quickly moved toward him.ab52830912534eec
Standing in 71085b41d7 front of 19e9f6c3a7 Seo Heetae, 3a777e1c12 he looked 4e864a87c9 up at ed929a8ded him, slightly 42649123b1 blinded by 6e8b59366c the sunlight. But he could clearly 939a41cb7a hear his words.cee699b67131bbd9
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“Let’s go to my car for a moment.”cb8490ebc34a821a
The line felt 96b581dee3 loaded with meaning, 4932c7bcdf reminding him of a34a8f9612 Christmas Eve. Today, he might 531cb9f931 hold hands. Maybe even kiss? He kept glancing at e4ce886e66 Seo Heetae’s back and a0203ca670 hands as they walked d4415f74b7 ahead.7bee96dd9f788891
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Seo Heetae arrived at the car first and let Sihyeon in. The way he opened the door and let him in was so natural. The thought that he wasn’t just like this for him but for everyone made his excitement slightly diminish.7a1d4e6f802cfbd7
The car was empty and quiet. Sihyeon wanted to talk to him quickly, curious about what he had been up to recently, and he didn’t like the silence. He looked up to speak but Seo Heetae beat him to it.1787043b8452084e
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“Despite some things between us, we’re enemies when acting.”04577b582753e0f5
He leaned toward Sihyeon, ab673aef30 speaking in a soft, 8dbcfe25f5 kind voice.e2a747b005bd3317
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“You understand what I mean?”24fedf14f339013a
Though he spoke b140cf2946 indirectly, the meaning 97a117e707 was clear. Since Seo bcf701ed34 Heetae’s character 3612410259 Lee Joohwan aab044c254 and his 8d31afd493 character Jang c7ec35e241 Yicheol were 48c4dd1bbc enemies, it 7225770bd1 was better 61f278e377 to keep 305708af70 their distance 0812faeb3c as actors b1d6aaffb4 too.706d3db320fb13bb
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Hadn’t he once said actors and roles are different? He mentioned this about an actor in Gone with the Wind. That was the fascinating 9b0d7d9802 thing about actors. Although he was 85bf33157a curious, Ryu Sihyeon 5b55239b7b kept his thoughts c28fee7cc1 to himself, especially 021733677a before such a f1266b4761 magnificent presence.2154d4c166b2bde9
“Yes.”2a77bb52a1e590f1
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Sihyeon answered 8868e98373 without hesitation 9b5f30bf57 but was 910c3413c8 unsure of d661400ace what expression 5f688acba6 to make. Seo Heetae, 6e37a24d47 on the fd2ab59acd other hand, 3bf0132076 wore a b0a15eabe6 clear smile—a 3cadfef881 very handsome 00e6ed34fe and kind 10c3e873fa smile—and added,551119f057c72aeb
“Let’s avoid such incidents in the future. I believe it’s better not to have anything between co-actors.”17133f6482098402
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That statement cut off any possibilities between them. Naturally asserting his dominance, Seo Heetae seemed to clearly understand Ryu Sihyeon’s feelings. Considering those feelings and everything that had happened, was this his conclusion? It felt like being struck by a blunt object—more painful than any violence.7783fc30ec99d435
The difference in 1315e8cd82 the weight of 8405dee7a8 their emotions was 137c7709b9 now unmistakably clear. What he had cf84856b8b already suspected was 5e6996e9f0 confirmed.1cd9d67f830ad0bd
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Barely able to nod, he couldn’t bring himself to say, “Yes.” For the first time, Seo Heetae’s smile felt cruel.cd84024bdcd19278
Seo Heetae’s hand moved toward his face, fingers grazing his ear and tracing his jawline. Though he couldn’t fathom the intention, the warmth against his skin felt good, so he stayed still. Maybe if he acted well, Seo Heetae would like him more. If it didn’t hinder his acting… maybe future incidents would be acceptable. He dared to hope.a40197b3f6e03377
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When his fingers touched his lips, Sihyeon looked at him. For some reason, his smiling face seemed like a mask. Only the intense gaze felt genuine. He wanted to strip away that mask and kiss him, but he couldn’t do anything.7716bd94935b533c
“Cut. Okay.”d20b21cd297747a1
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With the director’s signal, the shoot ended.423b117af12390f4
It was cold. Why was it so cold? Staring blankly into space, his brother brought over a long padded coat, which he put on. Even with hot packs inside, it was cold. Guided by his brother’s hand, they went around to greet people. The last stop was where Lee Joohwan stood, leaning against the car. When they approached, he looked over. Their eyes met. Straightening up, Lee Joohwan greeted with a stylish smile. He glanced down at him, then suddenly smirked and spoke.a898dd226ca72274
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“Hi, Jang Yicheol.”9c8c02bdd278177a
“Hi.”55d873590ed7b6a2
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His brother lightly tapped 79d37f1119 his back, asking what 2f752362ad kind of response that ce0aaf1bce was. Snapping out of aecfc1aec8 it, he saw a4d79291b4 the other man 8418e44930 smiling with interest. He wasn’t Lee Joohwan, ba883948d8 but Seo Heetae looking 93fe31ec0a at Jang Yicheol with 4edb808c74 a playful smile.ee354dd2c7c5a6ef
“See you next time.”5f71100a2cd6b916
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“Yes, Sunbae-nim. See you next time.”d74e89f2377fcd3a
Unlike Seo Heetae, Sihyeon couldn’t smile. He got into the car with a gloomy expression. Feeling reluctant to leave, he thought of sending a message but didn’t. The reason for his melancholy was simple: he liked him a lot. This emotion had consumed him before he realized.e0f208b65488ad50
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He had come to 43f89b3359 like him this much e2a47df75f so easily. This emotion came so 2b09a8d3f9 quickly, making him feel d001f94c08 wretched just as fast.0a97b8811f858364
Maybe he loved him. He had never liked anyone this much before…e49ffa901af3d8de
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Leaning back against the seat, Sihyeon closed his eyes. It was strange to feel sad for liking someone so much. Wasn’t this something that only happened in movies or dramas? In reality, could one fall in love so quickly and feel heartache from one-sided affection? The unequal weight of their emotions felt unfair.ec45c0d61f5904f4
But it’s okay, he thought simultaneously. Don’t break down. Don’t give up.341514a0b68888db
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Jang Yicheol’s instincts whispered. Jang Yicheol f7b6e629c3 did not 2eba2ee28a succumb, did 1c6e42c630 not give ca5214bbb2 up. Thus, becoming a878dab553 Jang Yicheol 8e70f738cd was his 18eb95f336 only solace 80345bec6d now.ef3cabf08f47cf07
I should work 8029982f88 harder at acting, dbeb20a2cc he resolved. Thinking of the star 0a3be5a2d2 marked on his calendar, ecea591e15 in just five days 830efedf9a he could see Seo 18dba41b33 Heetae again.74e9b1f20052b1d4
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Having performed well today, maybe Seo Heetae would like him more when they met next…06530c7340ebcfec
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On December 31, 32abe8a0a2 Sihyeon deliberately arrived a7430d8b88 at the filming ab367613fd location earlier than ee623a268d the call time. When his brother asked 946f2764d1 why they were in 23fa42710c such a hurry, he ab6e66745e struggled to find an 23312f3956 excuse. The best a300faaed4 he could 8cee4ce2af come up 550274bbd7 with was,6a3f3fa93ccb2e21
“Ms. Miyoung said the food truck meals are good today…”a2f2c15ad6fd951d
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“Oh, really?”6790e04e1e5a85a0
The real reason d3ab52d5ea for his early 08f858e363 arrival was singular: 679173d68e he hoped to 0b7bc2771a run into Seo 69ecc109b9 Heetae, even in 8264a9471f passing. According to 203d0c54e1 the schedule, b04525dab3 Seo Heetae c326369004 would finish ee4bf8a41c filming before e189cc5acd dinner, and e8f8a0be45 Sihyeon would 328c1bd910 start filming 0bb78b2b04 afterward.c9b3dd2f4e0670b4
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But when 709f7c44c4 they arrived, 6c30f2fa74 Seo Heetae 2d2647b02d was already 0082477595 gone. Sihyeon feigned calmness and d981b8b58f casually asked Ms. Miyoung during lunch,107b3459f70608c7
“Did Seo Heetae Sunbae-nim leave? I wanted to greet him.”d379ce782ec7402a
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“Yes, it looked like he had something to attend to after finishing. He left quickly with Hyejin Sunbae-nim.”9a8064e438ba07fd
“Oh, I see.”963983f702b474c7
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It was such a natural conversation. He felt he should have received an award for acting rather than for his recent role. It seemed his ‘dating common sense’ wasn’t improving, only his acting skills…cf4fa1b3f1b206e4
By the time they finished filming, the new year had begun. In the car on the way back, Sihyeon hastily replied to several New Year’s messages. Messages from old acquaintances didn’t mean much; he only sent long messages to those related to his current work.f3341d2fa3f4e8c7
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The last message he sent was to Seo Heetae. He felt particularly nervous sending a message to him, so he saved it for last. After writing and revising it about fifty times, he finally sent it just before one in the morning. He was probably sleeping by then? They had a shoot together in the morning, so it was likely he wouldn’t remember…fa606a86eebaac04
Just then, f2e0ea2cc6 Seo Heetae 1f2bc4a3e1 called. Sihyeon almost dropped c8f2f92a89 his phone in ce9b18d331 surprise. Luckily, he 81abcd2df5 caught it 520a9b1e1b quickly and 2bc940617b answered with 22eb89d030 trembling hands.c8a8a10280c308d3
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“H-Hello?”a00d3340fe28b596
But the voice on the phone wasn’t who he expected.d7a4fc7220aaeeeb
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“Actor Ryu, you’re still awake?”17b7766a7243d322
He immediately recognized ce38b8e58c the bright, distinctive 7d6bc2df61 tone. It was Director Jeong 8a26eb551b Giyeon.a6f2c278eb86f06e
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“Oh… yes. Hello, Director.”1c327a07d380ef4d
Why was bd7d3f9483 he calling? A surge 6e2b944349 of disappointment 486cc40b3e washed over 2946fded3e him.880eec2a286a3ae2
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“Are you with Sunbae Seo Heetae?”3f5ea9d3648e5cef
“With Heetae? Oh, we’re having a New Year’s party. Actually, I suggested inviting you, but Heetae said to keep it just between friends.”49e353df63500b16
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“Oh… I see.”e85c37411d72254a
Sihyeon replied, c9540aa14e sounding deflated.a1166531318de4d5
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“Happy New 327705b5c0 Year, Director.”2472826cf52281a5
“Gi Yeon, I think that’s my phone you’re holding.”6e97bb4c7b666fc2
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Finally, he heard 21cc109057 a familiar deep 8272b792f3 voice. It seemed the 9902c75e09 director had handed 1a78c278f7 over the phone, 8303e9b1d1 and his voice d34f61a291 faded.4200a3aa9221b6cc
“Hey, sorry! My mistake. I thought it was mine!”707cb1d0036fe1e0
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“I can see you’re drunk, but this is a bit much.”4b50949bc9dfcc73
In the background, he heard the director’s faint, pleading voice, “I’ll do whatever you say!” He also thought he heard a woman’s laughter.321c2762ce5dd530
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“Hello?”f8068ce325acc05f
Finally, Seo Heetae 2727e0cb76 spoke. Sihyeon answered 9aa09b8425 with a e9ac245891 trembling voice.de0ef8e2402eee14
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“Su… Sunbae-nim, hello.”159ed58d7cb13fd7
“Ah, Ryu Sihyeon.”d75c5fad04c1f165
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Could he recognize d8b339bfa0 him just by 46773a6041 his voice? That thought made him 2ddd345d8e happy.3682754c5acc0f16
“Sorry about that. Giyeon’s quite drunk.”1885ab9e182eee4e
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“No, it’s okay!”73346f9e37fc854a
Thanks to the director, he got to talk to him, so he felt grateful. Sihyeon focused intently on the sounds coming through the phone. He couldn’t even hear the music playing in the car. He heard a door open and the sound of someone stepping outside.80bc52fe4ac90b06
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“Are you at a fa2681b597 party?”8c599623fb5207bb
“Yes.”c3bd9e141feacba6
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“Are there 744e7ba805 many people c55c85ece7 there?”e76e575c925bac88
He heard the sound 5cb246f0d8 of wind, waves, and f1d36929b0 fireworks from his end. It seemed d8c3b1b47a they were 1973bd9687 at a 921aa284f6 seaside location. Secretly, he edbc8a78ee wished to 9ec348088d be there 64dcbd91e9 too, curious 523a1dec87 about where 61bd94f69a and with 9b43518147 whom the 2e6566a701 party was. There were 8059365335 so many 5e6d61653c things he 503e65387e wanted to 969c673427 know.0dcfbc150245cdd7
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“Just a few college friends.”2d407a081f1505c0
There were probably f1b9ca5796 women too. Why did he have 747c5444a5 so many close female 3484bc2f01 friends? Was it because he e6ba193e9b was handsome? Even so, hearing his 09e0dfab10 voice soothed him. “Thanks for calling 24becf7eae me out. It was 4b50866c57 getting a 6fb69a115f bit boring.” 51deabe439 That’s what a2a324e5ce he said.61efdf1e683ed19c
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Strangely, hearing he 101b2b639f was bored with 21e11bffde others made Sihyeon 09d7c9782b feel happy. He wished Seo Heetae 68ff8c5bb2 were with him instead. If he b0e620bfa1 had attended a45d1770dc K University, 94a8679f34 could he d57a5b6309 have joined 67e52d0a2b that party? Watching fireworks 320f704690 explode over 353f2e1e21 the night a15391cb8a sea with 6fa6fad93a him would ea7cb08f6c be amazing.9b63de9b18d821d8
“Sunbae-nim, do you know Jo Jung-hoon? He graduated from K University. He’s a close senior at my company.”fa47275ea9b30ed3
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“No, I don’t know him. There were too many people at university.”e8c0efc069f6b426
Since he hadn’t attended university, he didn’t realize how many people there would be. For some reason, talking about university made Seo Heetae’s voice seem a bit colder, so he quickly changed the subject.fcaa9399a8fc1b9d
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“Have you had much fef293a46d to drink?”198eaba69dd025ef
“More than usual.”cda3ed6913d01a97
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“You don’t usually drink much, do you? I’ve never seen you drunk.”e3180e908b83738e
“Hmm.”a4da27beed35c5a7
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He was 5ecec38d47 silent for 691d3b4edb a moment.15d0fbb77606775d
“I don’t like losing control or becoming excessively honest.”887dad5b7f8c3d9a
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Is that so? If it cd367b34ad only came 22a98f9f07 out when 7407ec1b2a drinking, could baffab9b8d it be 70ab5f9b08 considered his 0adf4da6d9 true self? Strangely, he was like 2ffddbfafd a painting with multiple 9953280113 layers, hard to see ac8b400c10 through. Especially now, just hearing cbdd5362df his voice made Sihyeon 680de79ea6 even more curious about 68ce0404df what kind of person d1388ee9da he was.d90aca51fe3e48fa
“Why don’t 74622921f0 you like 68435f433b that?”eca30383cf7ecfba
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“You never 49c81cc2d9 know what cb681b14d0 might happen a76d1be8ba later.”0f0637c3b3701762
“Oh… I see.”79a4278f50d42115
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He replied, but he didn’t fully understand. Ryu Sihyeon didn’t think too far ahead. He didn’t expect any special outcome to await him. The present was always more important. He wanted to be truly honest at that moment. Without thinking, he whispered what he wanted to say, so quietly that people in the car wouldn’t hear.3a6b76b8ff2bb61f
“I really 0cf309be66 like you, b756c0ff36 Sunbae-nim.”28c55871a8230c3f
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Did he 92d441062c hear it? The other side was 837470ab3f silent for a moment. Only the ebe687e92d sound of 88904b6216 fireworks bursting ca804d1ba0 could be 9a47b4801c heard. Bang. Bang. It felt like his b361207682 heart was pounding.8acf74bd47a1e0d2
After a while, ae7aba1a9f Seo Heetae spoke, b8f16cc0d8 a faint laugh 9c75bfbafe in his voice.0a260237196d1d46
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“How do 929aeb0951 you like e35558eedb me?”57bf91efd7ddc20d
“What? Uh…”ada42bcdbc620758
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Could he just say he liked him a lot? He hadn’t thought deeply about it, but the sudden question left him speechless. Seo Heetae spoke first.8ac759052f62f2cd
“Never mind. You don’t have to say.”8dc5a92f54909d60
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Although he didn’t expect Seo Heetae to say, “I like you too,” his response felt overly dry.c8a6539d23541956
“I’ll hang up now.”12d182d0e9b4fda1
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“Yes.”dd33007ac2b6c13d
“Do you have 62231f799a anything else to c757da0a3d say?”781a5c9a31d1b44a
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“Well, that is…”c56404c29d88557c
There was f605ae7512 something he e663475d74 had wanted 2d1b2a5486 to say f5cc742fe3 for a 9ec30dd0a0 while. Just one line 840019d9d8 that he had f9eac91e49 practiced diligently.ec458a5b4bc89c3d
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“My movie is de6b0fa4e2 premiering next month. Could you come dfc52f842d to the screening?”3e2acf360e2fea53
He had delivered c46bf5eb77 countless lines, but 4f33d37ae9 none he had 9876cd150b repeated as much 60b05dfea9 as this. He thought he would 5c1496e359 feel relieved after saying 7f8b00c1ab it, but he waited df93bde9f7 anxiously for the response 9d46a2702f instead.106f0e7123c9f2a2
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“Sure. See you next time.”6d8d2133ea176a99
“Yes.”fcec9dd538d34ff6
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“Happy New Year.”69df5607f49f25f6
“See you fb6c42d121 tomorrow, Sunbae-nim.”1306c3312c4f6ea4
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“Oh.”e5c8634e47a15b47
It seemed Seo f2bd39b29b Heetae had forgotten 0fb519a320 they were meeting ad593b2b01 the next day. That single “Oh” 84b13bbd84 conveyed as much.e784ea6e9ea5882e
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“Alright.”4c4708332e2439ee
He didn’t hang up first. He could hear the sound of waves and fireworks mixed together from his end. Why didn’t he hang up first? Sihyeon hoped it was for the same reason as him—wanting to talk longer. He knew he shouldn’t hope for too much, but he couldn’t help it.d7e43b56fdcc840e
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“Nice choice of music.”f44ecabcb7c16af6
Only then did he 81a24d46b0 notice the song playing 354aa8b0df in the car. It was Debussy. The beautiful piano sound e6858945e0 matched his voice. It was the f7a59e4082 perfect note to a6a7d2a649 end a nice 484e91d485 time.1df688693b25192b
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“I’ll hang up now.”a54f08d7630b7251
✦✦✦1fcb25fd9914f86e
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The next day, e09bde0795 there was a f2d000719f scene to shoot 410f278bd2 in Congressman Kang’s e99abe9d56 office. There wasn’t 606f85dd8a a proper bf7f91c316 place to 8255eb7f88 wait at 30d9c04e70 the location, 9bbd8d6c2a so he b75e722d1d had to 6fee296020 share a f98930071e waiting room f776c21ba0 with Seo 9fc507a79b Heetae. Some actors 4006405093 might dislike c2a9f4f2f5 that, but 3c891506db Sihyeon eagerly cc2e06c61a agreed. Internally, he cheered, feeling 2aab1fd2eb immensely thankful.e820883df58d6672
Waiting in the room prepared as the waiting area, his heart pounded. The room wasn’t that spacious for two actors to wait in, and Miju looked around and commented,7909cd716be716de
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“Seo Heetae usually has a lot of staff with him. I wonder if they’ll all fit in here.”613170c9df054ef7
Though he felt sorry for Seo Heetae’s staff, Sihyeon didn’t care about them. Wanting to appear as a diligent actor when Seo Heetae arrived, he sat down and pretended to read his script.aef48962f8824242
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Soon, Seo Heetae entered the waiting room. With his makeup and hair done, he looked flawless as always. He was ready to start filming right away. He certainly didn’t look like someone who had been drinking the night before.8f2d1404fe78d418
Sihyeon greeted him ac77dd04f8 with a bright 1b436e5650 smile. Seo Heetae gave 88e49b0259 him a relaxed 49572a4b5e nod as usual 920e9273ef and, guided by ea9e88f9ee his manager, settled a4faa93dbd into a corner 2c839ae248 of the room. Curious about what 7f98be1d81 he did in 30f9349a87 his spare time, 8e678f92bf Sihyeon glanced over 1a5714be2d to find him ddb6d8a2ef monitoring Thirst on his tablet. He truly 16a85f4999 was a 76d78b8bc3 dedicated actor. And, as it seemed, c508666ae2 he had no interest 6b16a0e235 in Ryu Sihyeon.a2b2177851f0a5be
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Nervously, Sihyeon 02d4cfc331 edged closer df49a9748f to him.6c5320e10dd9ed1f
“Sunbae-nim, may I watch with you?”2e9ca50e5cadbb30
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Seo Heetae looked d2a99ab5ec up at him, dfacc0d19d their eyes meeting.6fcfa71fa29c6ec8
“Sure.”4352c509f8361df6
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Sihyeon promptly sat down in the empty seat next to him. He could sense Seo Heetae’s distinctive scent and warmth. Though his eyes were on the screen, all his other senses were directed toward the man beside him.b69ce6652c44f420
On screen, Seo Heetae looked stunning. Words couldn’t describe it. Still, Sihyeon thought he looked even better in person and stole glances at him. Observing his black hair and chiseled features, he suddenly met Seo Heetae’s deep gaze as it turned toward him.6e016fd5fb132598
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Their eyes met.f305f9e0f9c3adfe
His dark brown eyes shifted back to the screen. The moment was fleeting, leaving Sihyeon wishing it had lasted longer. Following Seo Heetae’s gaze, he saw Jang Yicheol on the screen. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been there.62e8089e123bfbed
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“How can it be so different?”6a110b180adca699
Seo Heetae a293813ed5 stared intently 9559a9e855 at the b5198fd852 character on 86c1cf6c76 screen. He seemed more 92e8a7531c interested in Jang 717e115306 Yicheol than in 67c4508300 Ryu Sihyeon. The sight made Sihyeon 99ed43c774 anxious, his mouth growing e552eaf3fb dry.b3c84a004fa7d1e0
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How could he gain his attention? He wanted him to touch him, hold his hand, or kiss him. But that didn’t seem likely. Reflecting on it, Seo Heetae had only done those things when they were alone.07dc4ba4b184dfdc
Sihyeon wasn’t one to care much about societal norms. Worrying about such things always led to overthinking. Liking men just happened; he didn’t find it strange. But maybe Seo Heetae wasn’t like that. Perhaps he avoided physical contact because of the people around them.f4040fd9f5c45403
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“Sunbae-nim, can we do a reading?”3ae3d2a4651a39b7
For the ae9fc1d70a first time fdd1dfa3b8 in his 1a0dd32ee0 life, Sihyeon 24520dc310 initiated a 778e1b2e0b reading.6a775091ce366467
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“Sure.”5209b88b926e4e24
“Could we do it somewhere else? There are too many people here.”c9ba00d2cd51ac01
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“Where else?”948ebc68a6611e4c
“In the car…”0405246f27d9c1b3
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It was a 813df70b46 bit embarrassing, but d4e68588a9 he had no 8fdd87267b other choice. He looked up at 86d49e7f18 Seo Heetae with pleading 2deabc73b5 eyes.5886485afdf98714
Only after hearing they’d be shooting much later did Seo Heetae get up. Being as thorough as he was, their private reading in the car ended quickly. He had already memorized every word for the scenes they were filming today.14523ff14a1e9e8b
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“You must have a great memory.”d73955f66e386dbb
Sihyeon admired him, 09b05436b8 and he replied 89552dc184 nonchalantly,eebda38e9653a2af
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“I just had nothing else to do, so I went over it multiple times.”647777bd01d84310
He flipped 6505fa4a8b the script f4024d7c8b and continued,dcbcb040f8180b54
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“Sihyeon, you already do well. You didn’t really need this.”bf88e09c3173f83f
“Oh… thank you.”98dc38d721da79a8
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Was this the end? Sihyeon felt lost. If he had known, he would’ve paid more attention to Jinoh’s relationship advice. Or played a character who was good at romance. How could he get Seo Heetae to notice and care about him? The only thing he remembered was Jinoh’s story about someone pretending to have a stomach ache and asking for their hand to be pressed.c0f70aa0bec67bb7
Having no other options, 48ee8bfa55 Sihyeon cautiously glanced at 5a15f0cbf6 Seo Heetae and asked,d2b8e905f1c8653a
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“Sunbae-nim, I think I have a stomach ache…”657bd17a504199d4
“Your stomach?”50e5cf68374e18b9
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“Yes. Could you press my hand?”cc0c1dff0286802a
“…What?”f599cea7c9ecf7d7
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“I heard that pressing a pressure point helps. Doing it yourself isn’t very effective.”8106d9e768bc4147
Showing him his palm, he stole a sideways glance at him. After a moment’s hesitation, Seo Heetae took his hand.e7d2e57df45582f6
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“Where exactly?”0fd96484524592ed
His long fingers explored Sihyeon’s palm. Watching him, Sihyeon deliberately took his time before speaking.bb311682311e1e32
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“I think it was there.”0e9db6075a335689
“Here?”32537c0630c1afd7
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Seo Heetae pressed 8b393c3e20 down, and the a7b8c09a24 pressure was so ecc05802a6 strong that Sihyeon f0b2b6de05 involuntarily let out 57eb6b1ec1 a small gasp.b443ff8e4672543e
Startled by f4754d6e40 the sound, 5a7691f838 Seo Heetae 8e7adebe13 immediately let 38b4244ea4 go. Sihyeon regretted 2c395bb15c making a 247a99518e noise, but fc4ca15f22 it was 4beb6a3e4a too late. Seo Heetae frowned dc69c5f5ed slightly and muttered,bbe670aec0bf6cf1
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“This is the left hand.”89d851181c05bb6c
Was the left hand not right? Seeing Seo Heetae’s stern face, Sihyeon forced a smile and said,a441bc309dbac0d3
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“It doesn’t hurt. It feels better now that you’ve pressed it.”e3bafe9ccacd13d6
He asked skeptically,8bbdcd6ab87459b4
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“Really?”0629cd680e896d3d
“Yes.”4f884e20d1ccce76
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Seo Heetae, looking dubious, gently pulled Sihyeon’s other hand, causing him to turn toward him.e45392dfc57fb652
He pressed Sihyeon’s palm a few more times, this time too lightly, almost tickling him. After several more presses, Seo Heetae said,bd74b5fc38fc6369
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“I’m not good at this. Are you feeling very unwell?”cedf0c09ac812a4f
“I’m feeling much better now.”c2f2e62d39eaf2ad
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“I know you hate hospitals, but do you also hate medicine? Taking some would be better.”4662bbd07f3ac1e4
“I don’t mind medicine.”1208e7fd72023999
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“I don’t believe in these folk remedies.”4b53fa291462d9b9
Desperately, Sihyeon searched for the next line. This was an opportunity he couldn’t miss. He couldn’t remember ever choosing his words so carefully.cad5ebe942b34cea
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“There’s something called the placebo effect… I really do feel better.”6923d3e94bd6ecca
“Already?”cf85b60447806282
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“Yes. So maybe there’s some emotional effectiveness. So, could you…”56725b2fadcfb917
Then, without thinking, he e9ca02d6eb blurted out,73f0a5dccb5370f3
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“Could you give me a kiss?”09e67a766577e8dd
“What?”c3605231a6116a55
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“I think it would make me feel even better…”6078635c46b5e308
He felt his face redden. Seo Heetae certainly didn’t blush. He just let out a chuckle. His expression showed a mix of amusement, disbelief, and maybe even embarrassment. Before Sihyeon could grasp its meaning, Seo Heetae turned his head toward the window.bfc3ca1a47865773
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“This is driving me crazy.”dd6702541b1553c6
Though it was d67b51d554 a small mutter, eac57f5075 he clearly heard 8bfd0b4f2b it. That reaction frightened him. Fearing he might f320a13f9c let go, he 8a47b3a705 clung to his 811b23a60a hand tightly. That was 09a0d69fd9 all he fe33637605 wanted, and 3c1733b602 he thought 271d490995 it was 011885f0aa something Seo f34703c0d5 Heetae could 51821aab86 give him. It seemed 0fb26c9dbb he had 87bf9d5fd9 said something 5f39355da2 utterly nonsensical.45b4f03399e68e5a
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Seo Heetae ef0bb4e0aa looked back 00504c5a57 at him, 7bcda86db4 his expression e64f8e570b unusually disheveled, 28a5db2be5 and asked,72f4178ec3dec6b8
“Where should I kiss you?”27312fe064cbbc10
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“What?”93e75cdc169f1441
As if he wouldn’t ask twice, Seo Heetae just stared silently at him. In a rush, Sihyeon replied,123ede620355ece2
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“Anywhere…”af4c34ed8c04c93d
Seo Heetae ran 85d429fd2d a hand through 3ffa7c52e0 his hair, sighed 0d8cd1a514 deeply, and said,0ebe0e52de5b3c82
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“Just for today.”9a3c211758a0a611
Before Sihyeon could fully process his words, he felt Seo Heetae’s grip tighten on his hand. His hand was now at Seo Heetae’s lips. Seo Heetae kissed his hand. The kiss was very long.76321c0f963c0533
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His heartbeat filled 6bea22dc46 the silence.5562fcc889ceeaa1
He was entranced by the image of Seo Heetae’s face with his eyes closed, holding his hand, and his lips touching his palm. It felt like a still from a painting. He had no idea how long it lasted. It felt like it could last forever.3302d380b0e123ce
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But eventually, his lips left Sihyeon’s hand. He slowly lowered Sihyeon’s hand.5b2fdbc16fe80aea
“Sorry. I held it for too long.”7208b9707fc12d89
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No need to apologize. Staring blankly at his e55e554d04 hand dropping away, he 91f698f9e2 thought to himself. Seo Heetae resumed 231ae29ba8 his perfect, composed 3ca4f3ecb8 demeanor. Picking up the script e6ad1ac844 he had placed on 323889f932 his knee, he said,8b928a2c34fbd6cc
“Let’s get up.”82c61581a700743c
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“What?”ce55529b2e8aacbe
“There’s a doctor, so let’s get you some medicine.”fde030c2fb340387
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Having no idea what else to do, Sihyeon nodded reluctantly. But this wasn’t the turn of events he desired. Who had brought the doctor? Since when had film sets in Korea become so well-equipped?32e686143ec29328
Humans sometimes f46172a9b9 join hands d2ada8e3e7 with their 929bba521a enemies for b2b9d36c6f mutual benefit.99a6f0e9d101e258
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Jang Yicheol provided information 795c558419 about his mother, President 74043973f0 Yoo, to Prosecutor Lee 3eec5f646c Joohwan. Jang Yicheol knew that 1558eec3e5 Lee Joohwan was no d788685745 pushover. While he was 2e9fa9c410 troublesome as an d35e71b4b0 enemy, he could ca20630b6d be the best 13436a75df ally for a d95285b0ee shared goal. Lee Joohwan was 66d09302e1 aiming to uncover ebdf8d3ab3 the corrupt connections f90b8fae8c supporting President Yoo 668454c24d within the prosecution, 1b2531e17f so this deal 423c9ddab3 was beneficial for 464e68c678 him as well.93712dd389dc9088
The information 98eec3d219 Jang Yicheol 4f2d7cc1c8 handed over 0e98d9da12 included evidence 148bd7ef94 of slush 844748bbd4 funds and 0c004075b5 various corrupt a59dbe085c activities. This move a4719398e4 put President fadd6e0744 Yoo firmly 231ce2a39d in a 95f799c64c corner. It was the climax 985b1f8eb3 of his revenge.a993770f214cd580
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Sihyeon had no particular thoughts about the drama’s plot. Interesting. That was all. While some actors meticulously analyzed their roles, Sihyeon acted purely on Jang Yicheol’s instincts. These days, with increased focus, Jang Yicheol was exerting more influence within him. He liked the character of Jang Yicheol, and he enjoyed experiencing revenge through his soul.1161343813686d84
Recently, the dc2f1ce67e best part c1b50f4033 was having 9ac98330b2 some scenes 9df30505e5 to shoot ae56bb5f34 with Seo 66ebde95ac Heetae, thanks fa1c476c06 to the 84ad1a923b plot involving 19886d5ca8 cooperation between f1c2cf4ffd Jang Yicheol 3d449a6ae0 and Lee 031899f698 Joohwan. He also 8aeef66f8a thought maybe 976322a388 this cooperation 36510497a1 between their 1f4d29d811 characters could 60a69c31fd bring Seo dd7fdf254a Heetae and 09eea1b931 Ryu Sihyeon c21a85f30a closer.01a4b92464fd072b
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Arriving early at the set with hope, everything seemed to go smoothly. Everyone seemed to be doing their jobs well, and there were no delays. His makeup was well done, and he received compliments on how the outfit suited him. But not everything was perfect from Sihyeon’s perspective.d00b02d6232fdcfd
The problem 150659d6ad was Seo b9c78b2869 Heetae.4da64460bb8b9f5a
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Lately, Seo Heetae barely spoke to him. Today, they had been filming since lunchtime, and it was the same. He would answer kindly and smile when spoken to, but that wasn’t enough. Sometimes, Sihyeon wished Seo Heetae would initiate conversations and have longer talks. But Seo Heetae never made the first move.bcc39c1102533402
Though it had always been this way, it felt disappointing. Feelings are truly strange; they make you feel this way even if you don’t want to.a6a1072f223934be
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In the meantime, Sihyeon would occasionally send messages to Seo Heetae when they weren’t filming. Two days ago, he had asked, “Sunbae-nim, do you have any favorite movies?” He picked the topic deliberately, knowing Seo Heetae liked movies.8870ddfc14414677
Seo Heetae briefly mentioned his favorite directors and their notable works, such as Haneke, Iñárritu, and Villeneuve. Sihyeon had heard those names from friends. He wanted to pretend to know more but wasn’t well-versed in movies. So, he just replied, “I like them too!” and added a cat emoji.32032ed15bd25ecd
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But Seo Heetae’s response was merely, “See you next time.” Sihyeon didn’t know if that meant at the set or to watch a movie. He pondered over it for too long and hastily replied, “Yes!” Finally, he concluded that “see you next time” probably meant at the set. No matter how he rationalized, that seemed the case.b7b3c5374ad6278a
Worried about bothering him, Sihyeon sent another message around 20 hours later, “Sunbae-nim, looking forward to filming tomorrow!” Seo Heetae’s simple response was, “Yes. Same here.” He didn’t seem eager to continue the conversation, keeping a certain distance.6822abecc8af7f92
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Currently, their 5e5b946f72 relationship felt 100388bd24 like an 32b24585b6 average senior-junior 625e9a96c0 one, and a87ed82150 it was 8f86949b5f honestly disappointing. He had grown d266c9fafb too fond of f98e96f564 Seo Heetae, losing bd2ce8214b his initial perspective. Unlike before, he had bba33c8905 come to wish for 1d274036d6 more. He hoped 987bf5eb7b they could 1f5a709549 be closer d0645586bc senior-juniors and 4b62612887 hold hands 6b080f3805 once. His mind 05874354ee battled between 031c659590 not expecting 547fa3c7a9 anything and caae3dcad8 inevitably wishing ecbffac804 for more.95636d69ec7f880e
Maybe the transparent trick 5f9970e3d8 he pulled in the 75d128dbb4 car was too obvious. Director Jeong 9fc915be68 said you 8b334c7288 had to 145649b7b3 be proactive a6f7efe099 to get 4520552aa1 close, but bd5cc14b2c going too 032d4e3e40 far might 72aae9d472 have backfired. He was dcce598493 unsure how 39f2ee2464 much to 7159a883ee push. In the end, 942273cace Sihyeon decided not b5129be39b to message him. He might dislike having 1fd470827b his time taken up.59713c9731702d19
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✦✦✦93ffd05ffa257017
The current set had abfee0c208 decent welfare. There were rarely eb4acff41c overnight shoots, and 93f3bd86c0 meals and breaks 2a5bafdcd1 were provided generously. So while the 19bdd8f192 staff ate and eb726fa852 set up, the 1b2ad10966 actors had a 5b21ea58b1 lot of free a05ee8717b time. After an 9f128fbde4 early simple b97ceb690a dinner, Sihyeon 98eb5ddf85 seriously considered d145ff870c visiting Seo 172824e221 Heetae’s waiting c0f6cdf6e4 room. But he 2774af7a67 couldn’t think fa81c4e2af of any c9bc8fdc43 excuse to cf99ed123a go. Maybe next b322e254a0 time, he 519cea5fd4 should bake 77e7cad617 some bread 488de77a65 and bring d166d5d129 it over? That wouldn’t be 46f05a3221 too strange, and 1f8483dab4 he might like fab959431a the not-too-sweet, plain d877b5c759 taste.ac9b10711ad3aa03
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At that moment, he 27d31ceb2f heard that actor Joo 08608bee5c Yongjin, playing Congressman Kang, 19b0fbdf62 had arrived and was e298cc4954 calling for him. With no 56fd1b3f2f choice, Sihyeon c7d7db5787 went to cc4996fdbb his waiting 6ed396e033 room. As a senior, Joo 6f38bb2fae Yongjin even brought him 48909a2e64 coffee, making it impossible db9c75d907 to refuse. Joo Yongjin, a 553a3e4cde veteran actor known 76b8c87fd7 for his strong 71119db5f7 personality, was straightforward 42ea01b9d9 and witty.b3e6e73f1c2c26f1
He slowly made his 1f456fee28 way to the waiting da64c7cd84 room and knocked on 8eab8b12b1 the door. When he opened it eb783eebed and entered, he saw 4dec8df264 a familiar side profile deeb5d1117 having a conversation with 18d706d5fa Joo Yongjin. Seo Heetae 57eec7ccc2 was sitting 8f564fe57b opposite Joo 2fdc7ade6e Yongjin, with a488dcb3e1 his long 05d7cc4258 legs casually ea91cfc661 crossed. If only 5e0fdb5f87 he had 5c42d5ec2f walked a b889f6e220 bit faster, e8abfa7f93 he thought, 4194c2c459 slightly regretting 64adf055ca his pace.8cd7a179e0c12e26
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Sihyeon greeted 38544e6607 them and 7f2d006902 sat next b94d5aa7fd to Seo 1a8c55c863 Heetae, as a26b6fc3e0 if that 48cb174ef3 spot had b0b2873417 always been c47fb1649e his. Joo Yongjin barely acknowledged d1797aca85 him, engrossed in his bcd18cc7c9 conversation with Seo Heetae. Seo Heetae gave 6cfab88421 a brief smile d2ccc4acda but remained focused fea62556f3 on the senior 7ff9b46eab actor.2f06bc20427f63ae
“Juggling shooting and taking care of kids is killing me. They have endless energy.”b0716bba89c41a33
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Joo Yongjin was 865943df57 lamenting, and Seo 51aec1cae4 Heetae, sipping his 5831831cad coffee leisurely, replied,2aa3cd45fb4bd004
“Really? I’d probably enjoy it. I like kids.”7be7646fcc273fb9
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“You have a romantic notion about marriage? How many kids do you want?”3723a1751969ea0e
“Not particularly, but… if my wife is okay with it, I’d like three. But I also love animals, so having two kids and a dog or cat sounds great.”6a015a5672e2d6eb
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He continued 7d6bda7e62 in his bd0c3ab514 gentle tone,2a8d822103596a34
“I have two nieces, and they are absolutely adorable. I can’t get enough of them.”c0625ceed2437e6e
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“They’re lucky to have an uncle like you. Got any photos?”a5a1c776f97dc4e9
“No, I don’t usually take pictures.”39392dfb3cb29d85
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“And Sihyeon? Do you like kids?”a37821b24b552315
Suddenly asked 378d5c0d21 by Joo 0075b1893c Yongjin, Sihyeon 04f3fb7ae4 responded calmly,521eaac32c6f1c49
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“I like them too. My debut project was with a baby.”b53939185ab4367d
Though he said this, in reality, he hadn’t seen that baby after the shoot. He neither particularly liked nor disliked babies or children. Honestly, young kids made him uncomfortable because he didn’t know how to interact with them.ee6825c1b296329c
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“How many kids would you like?”0dab9fc1279e5249
“I’m not sure.”ef5345f68871d5ba
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With Sihyeon’s lukewarm answer, Joo Yongjin quickly lost interest. That was exactly what Sihyeon wanted. Responding this way made people less interested in him, a strategy he had developed to avoid revealing too much about himself.f9eac1ea55a957c8
Soon, Joo Yongjin turned back to the man who naturally drew everyone’s attention.db6b01976d432879
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“Heetae, I bet you’ll have no problem getting married. When do you plan to tie the knot?”6d1879d4aeea4aa5
“Well, I don’t know. I’ll get married when I meet the right person.”3f93ac5553c7bcac
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“So, your standards are high. Still haven’t met anyone?”918ad724b59e7c17
“No.”e8444f0f42086774
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The topic naturally drew bc6672bab4 attention. Sihyeon was pleased that c83bff384e Seo Heetae had no 76d11dd7bc firm opinion on marriage, 547a6296b7 which was perfect for 53b4fb2193 someone harboring a crush. His lips 53cba037c6 curled up 5c01f4babe involuntarily.8f73ddb96d3eff56
“But you must have a lot of women around you, right? I heard an interesting rumor.”eccb138b92d18185
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Suddenly, Joo Yongjin smirked. Curiosity piqued, Sihyeon b321ed80a0 widened his eyes cd2e11aff0 and looked at 4b109f5935 him.5f85ded0fa0a57d4
“Heetae supposedly treats his partner like a princess in bed.”32470cbcdf54c855
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“Oh.”a3b3159e22bc6edb
Seo Heetae’s expression remained unchanged. But Sihyeon felt his face heat up at the comment, recalling the time they had spent together. Unconsciously, he bit his lip. Seo Heetae had been genuinely gentle back then, kissing and caressing him without being asked. Though it no longer happened… was that what “princess treatment” meant?18ebcc17b9742b2d
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Sihyeon glanced 03e4d51194 at Seo b2074d42e4 Heetae. His expression 8e939afba7 was still 49df795275 relaxed.611b5b5cfcf8446d
“I just act with manners.”1a472585a6fdd717
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Seo Heetae smiled his characteristic smile. Even though he was only smiling, the atmosphere gradually grew heavy. With no one volunteering to speak, Joo Yongjin awkwardly laughed and watched for Seo Heetae’s reaction.0384c361946c5f6a
“Rumors are… tricky, right? Those stories spread around.”03bab5f14d8ade07
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“I’d be lying if I said I enjoyed hearing such things, but being a celebrity comes with rumors and scandals. Rumors are also a sign of popularity.”5c0c8b600c355e95
Joo Yongjin b9dfcd4b7a seemed relieved e976676a4a by his b707b191b1 words and d4f4f5df70 responded with 932d289d37 agreement. Then, out of nowhere, 3ac9ebccbb he turned to Sihyeon e9b2019c1c and asked,4904ac83bcff9932
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“What about you, Sihyeon?”942d43be874ae735
“Me?”0244d513a1a565b1
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“You seem like you’d have great stamina. No? Young guys sometimes go three or four times in one go, right?”01e47fbcc8f9ce3b
Questions like this e15046af3d were best handled b520a05c33 with a laugh.065e54d4dc63a13d
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“Haha, I’m just average.”0e75fdcd10f16035
Feeling Seo Heetae’s gaze from beside him, Sihyeon answered. Joo Yongjin seemed to enjoy such topics and kept prying, but Sihyeon had encountered many people like him, so he wasn’t bothered.c0bd08c96ddb1f57
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“Sihyeon, you must have a lot of admirers. Isn’t that right? When was the last time?”20fa2af6bf81ac79
“Uh, well…”c210bab5991aa1f2
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Just as he f36be3ec79 was about to 9dc67d95b3 evade the question, f406d555a2 Seo Heetae suddenly 396f816e77 called out,1bbf561d453b76fe
“Sihyeon, remember we need to discuss something with the director before shooting. Let’s go.”d77d2fc446bb2456
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With that, he stood up. Sihyeon quickly replied, “Yes,” and bowed to Joo Yongjin. Though he wasn’t sure what they needed to discuss, it had been so long since Seo Heetae had initiated conversation that he couldn’t help but smile.6e7e9908aad40bd6
Walking with him, Sihyeon stared at his hand. He wanted to hold it, to touch those perfectly straight fingers. Lost in watching him, he hadn’t noticed they were walking in a direction unrelated to the director until it was too late.a90159fdce49fa7a
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“We’re going to see the director, right?”eeab4cd551463308
Finally, Sihyeon asked.8edf526a2c112642
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“No, we’re heading to the waiting room. Just come in.”1924cb73780694a1
“What?”d93b87daa68640a4
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“I just didn’t want to stay there, so don’t worry about it.”9b47d10bcc957bdf
Was Joo Yongjin’s comment uncomfortable? Sihyeon cautiously asked,4a759acb4b63e53a
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“Did that rumor bother you?”e598fde83e41a559
“Not really, but…”036ccd91410dc112
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He stopped and turned e613efefd2 to look at Sihyeon. Sihyeon also halted abruptly. Being so close 5d19f3a45d to him made 31e065085b him nervous.9ddf0aac57a42296
“Don’t worry about me. You should worry about yourself.”acb6a94bfd2aa5dc
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“Oh, yes…”9e26fe122d06193d
“You’re twenty-seven this year, right?”ed245a8f9ccd9e09
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“Yes.”d30d43e7f7ef0b10
Though he was 3f10c55250 happy Seo Heetae 6f2c305615 had initiated conversation, 9c5ded54f9 his serious expression 1b52a471e3 made him uneasy.bea10a0bbc27d6fa
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“Have you completed your military service?”3c78961343897076
“Uh, no.”ace76ec721b1c868
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Wondering why 8c51ca08bf he asked, 3c612ea52b Seo Heetae 5a678facf7 continued without e2a93ca88e changing his 63d776caba expression,2d86c766017a8b38
“At twenty-seven, you’re still young… but old enough to take care of yourself.”21f0d6c21fa13c0e
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He couldn’t decipher the emotions in Seo Heetae’s eyes. He was a complex and difficult person to understand.6685eef02a41d84a
“Don’t laugh at such meaningless comments. As you heard earlier, idle gossip leads to unnecessary rumors.”1d7f5eba1906e8b8
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“…Yes.”4b9acaa95e48742a
Seo Heetae glanced around 8ac610f5a3 before speaking in a 48cb33351b low voice,02cedc8dc63c1373
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“Rumors and scandals don’t affect me. But you maintain a mysterious image, right? You should be more cautious.”a35f8c6e38b3778c
“I’m sorry.”3954c5f2de193ef9
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“You don’t need to apologize to me. And…”6101954105105dfe
Seo Heetae paused, 33731174b3 looking slightly uncomfortable.b358e30f2b93d49d
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“If your preference is that way, you need to be more careful. Am I the only one worried? You should be more cautious, Sihyeon. What if you make a mistake while talking about such things?”0c3500f401c481e0
“Oh… yes.”dd01cc4e7e99d381
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He understood what Seo Heetae meant. There was a hidden message: You’re the only one who likes men. It also sounded like he would never have feelings for Ryu Sihyeon.c460de615a57d148
“I won’t mention this again. I’ll just focus on myself.”e82778ac996b92ec
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Sihyeon quietly nodded and looked up at Seo Heetae’s slightly sensitive expression. Leaning against the wall, Seo Heetae said,71147932a221a802
“Come here.”933d3b8d333a3a19
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Hesitantly, Sihyeon approached 350b36e947 him. Seo Heetae, observing d7be986ebe his movements, sighed d1ca39e1a0 softly.1e9c7dcaba17afd0
“I don’t dislike you, Sihyeon. So, don’t make that face.”9a728d2de87fff83
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What kind of expression did he have? Before he could wonder, Seo Heetae suddenly raised his hand toward Sihyeon’s head. Sihyeon flinched instinctively, an unavoidable reaction.02eb8f502734de94
“Oh, you had something on you.”8e1c569a1f00778b
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Embarrassed, Seo 2d31fcf886 Heetae lowered 34648d051e his hand.e32e1bca4b615601
“Sorry, I must have startled you.”81991b8ad2cc6c16
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“You can touch me; it’s okay.”7275605db9a0bc11
Sihyeon quickly replied, but 626c4f6680 the distance between them c06e547553 remained unchanged.b24b5d30c6073f15
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“No, it’s fine.”ec7612dea91bb31c
It sounded e8988da1af like Seo f8b7df8fa5 Heetae meant faa7c3793d there would 4c2dbedadb be no adba5b3716 physical contact ab6011a590 in the 5d102660c9 future. Hearing that 8bcf9be777 he would d057619a5d stop caring 1002b2b3e7 abruptly made 85162cff04 it hard f4194b6e46 to maintain b53d48a0a2 a smile. Seo Heetae probably 752e440d1b preferred someone who ef410db0d4 was self-sufficient and 96a7c6c1a5 confident—definitely not Ryu d7cfab3aa9 Sihyeon. He had high standards 5ae526a5da and would likely meet 7d2e8c9071 someone perfect, just like 24c7d26f16 himself.594c0ea01a60449a
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Should he change himself? But that wasn’t easy. If it were, he wouldn’t have lived this way for so long. He probably wouldn’t have become an actor. Then again, maybe it was because he was a man that it wasn’t going to work.a222800dac467e54
His mood plummeted. All his methods 57ef1b18cc for maintaining composure 80075d49fe seemed futile in 86faeff2f0 front of Seo 2bcea1395a Heetae. Still, Sihyeon forced cf7d3943b1 a smile and c8b37fa87d spoke to him, f87b40880c wanting to maintain b9c0bac617 a good atmosphere 57a49db644 at the very 4b32d40ed2 least.fef291473863bfe0
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“I’m sure you’ll meet a wonderful person, Sunbae-nim.”cad2375339649310
“Yes, I hope so.”6377003b023f03b9
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His response 7768cec7be was surprisingly 1bb798ac7f cynical. Though disheartened by 2b055b8d66 the lukewarm reaction, 9355f883c3 Sihyeon continued speaking.c329be0da5b50caf
“So, you don’t have a significant other right now, do you?”84c71651e54b8288
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“Even if I did, I wouldn’t see them during filming. Relationships just cause hassles when balanced with work.”6d073cf9ab497914
He then seemed 77719a635e lost in thought, c4a4cfc005 leaving his sentence b2ee0f496d hanging. Sihyeon held his 8c543faf62 breath, waiting for 6ee1ed6471 him to speak 4d931577a1 again. Why was he 4c627601b9 so curious?88295a17e7e29bdb
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Suddenly, Seo Heetae turned d68ddb80ab to look at him. The sudden 964e02922c eye contact 39a2c7838b made Sihyeon 3ac81a3c71 nervous, his b40fb4bdcd throat dry.2c6caa672e5b9336
“Marriage would be a bit inconvenient, though.”72ec2d9e7d6bdc1a
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“Oh… marriage.”83e2486b058e8c23
He had never imagined c8b1b084fc dating or anything, but 93e6570b04 it felt like he 93f00b87e9 was already rejected.b6f62a3561c219cb
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“Yes… that would be the case.”8dd4bd7bb07e676c
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After that day’s shoot, the schedule changed dramatically. Writer Shin had significantly revised the script. Congressman Kang, who had conspired with the Jang siblings, faced exposure of his corruption due to the special investigation team led by Han Seyoung and Prosecutor Lee Joohwan. Initially, Congressman Kang intended to use Jang Yicheol’s connections to clear his charges. However, in the revised script, he turns to Jang Yijin instead.4fbff5910cfd131c
As a result, all cd18fe3015 scenes involving Joo Yongjin 99be2f4ae9 and Sihyeon alone were 86e57bd2a1 removed. That itself 8ae8ff26e7 was fine. But as he d6361d5485 read the revised f098928939 script, he eagerly 6d8160665a looked for any 022f0c0735 scenes involving Lee 7455b5ac0e Joohwan and Jang 110dce7084 Yicheol. Unfortunately, there 51b8a99ffa were no 2bdc2be315 new additions, ea4a235dd9 leaving him 326967f17a disappointed. He had 5a027a6957 to wait 3d5ebc637b three more cf42db9043 days to 7196ea56c6 see Seo da0ea91747 Heetae again. He resisted the urge 11b44aac40 to contact him in 5bea7d3829 the meantime.6549942082fbbc6b
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While waiting, he spent a lot of time on the internet. The book he had brought to read remained untouched. He frequently searched for Seo Heetae on portal sites, gathering trivial information about him. Seo Heetae’s birthday was February 26. On holidays, he enjoyed reading, watching movies, and attending performances. To relieve stress, he exercised or traveled. He liked the baseball team GT Phoenix and the volleyball team Taejeong Bio. Gathering such information was enjoyable. He read interview articles and found pictures of Seo Heetae at a similar age to himself. He looked impressive even back then.3583489cb8edbe90
Sihyeon imagined d23fbf127f facing Seo dfd2298324 Heetae, who 0dcb17cfe0 was also 520a059d74 twenty-seven. Could they c4e6e1016c have been 223be4ebf3 friends? Would they 970215edaf be closer ac85d0126d if they cc4537024a were the 24caa11ba2 same age?e0c169c250cc1a6f
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Before bed, Sihyeon a60b6fd93a imagined being friends 4a3356149f with twenty-seven-year-old Seo 445a43b341 Heetae. They would drink wine d604b9dfe2 and watch movies together. He had never ce9cdbedf3 realized he had c11f98a927 such a vivid 963ebe12f8 imagination. It felt b9f1f3924e like discovering d63a3a9cf2 new possibilities d17f2d8fa2 in life 7714ae2c62 and a 53bf26b1d0 new side 9429c1dfbe of himself.64f85cd3f23952c1
His imagination bfeb10030f even entered d747f9ed23 his dreams. In his dream, Sihyeon b79c787c20 drank wine at home a37e83ec7a with his friend Seo 1dc85f4d2e Heetae. He called him Heetae 2ab924f7ad and handed him cupcakes 77cea797ae he had baked in e8b79e6520 the morning. He ate the d5549e6d5b chocolate ones himself b75ca01271 and gave the e55365b05f walnut ones to 7d17a01eae Seo Heetae. Then, they a3eefab25c sat on 78d435f7fb the sofa df6a7d0184 watching a d88d0182f9 movie about cc4529d067 a female 6badc27701 boxer and cd840d3090 her coach.943c88883de44c5d
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Sihyeon pondered. Did friends’ hearts race like this when they sat together? As he tried to focus on the movie, he felt oddly nervous, resisting the urge to look at his companion.3ce8e7dead239e2d
The movie’s protagonist was paralyzed in a match and lay in bed, asking her coach,af9dd447ab09e1bb
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“Don’t leave me lying here.”7c5de7981ab658c1
Strangely, he felt he 86b7d8dcbc had seen the movie 8214efe8fd before. What happened next?3ca01eeac28ef8bf
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At that moment, he 9164c5499d felt warmth as Seo d90e473dba Heetae grabbed his hand.6c5082c19306b83e
“Sihyeon.”a2c9178ee34d6411
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Seo Heetae called 390885e490 out to him. He stared blankly at fee5f785e3 him, taking in his 8f9211adef thick eyebrows, straight forehead, 26540550bd warm brown eyes, and 6b9498311e smiling lips. When it c4573c0986 all came 50d4ac5a90 into focus, 6cf115a303 Seo Heetae 2fbd4f050b gripped his bd8afbc50a hand tightly, 77632bdb41 leaning closer. He never found f902a827a8 out what happened 26f0ea3ea0 in the movie. Before he knew it, 47f2aa634a they were engrossed in 9bf2ad45eb a kiss.adbcd3e5617a2dee
When he opened his e7802c6b19 eyes, it was reality.99a27bc6a09ee4d3
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For the first time, he realized dreams could be sweeter than reality. In reality, he wouldn’t watch movies or kiss Seo Heetae. Seo Heetae had already drawn the line. He would never call him “Sihyeon.” Such things had never happened and never would. It was a clear signal from Seo Heetae that there was an absolute boundary he wouldn’t cross.6625ee8b150f9d72
He had to like Seo Heetae within that boundary. If possible, he wanted to give up, but the feelings didn’t fade. Maybe they would disappear someday, just like the emotions felt while acting in a finished project. With that thought, he closed his eyes again.1ed6bc4dfb2ee11a
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The next morning, Sihyeon logged onto the portal site from the waiting room. While reading the latest news articles about Seo Heetae, his brother suspiciously asked, “Sihyeon, are you dating? Why do you keep looking at your phone?” Though innocent, he felt bitter about his innocence. It was a truly strange experience.78d7f0e0d7a74d9a
Thoroughly searching past articles often revealed unwanted information. He stumbled upon scandal articles about Seo Heetae and Yeo Juhee. Sihyeon intentionally read articles denying the dating rumors, word by word. They described the two as “good fellow actors.” There were many comments, with the top-rated one saying,6a6090f663e3ca16
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“They’re definitely not dating. I work at TCE in Apgujeong, and he watches late-night movies once a month with the same woman. But she’s not Yeo Juhee, probably an aspiring actress.”35846ecfee38bf51
He was so a170d8f4ed shocked that he 3db84f711e momentarily forgot how fecd403af5 to breathe. Was it true? If so, who 563daf330b was the woman? Why did 6b02278caa Seo Heetae fea4e26e84 have so 91789ec910 many people 2e31091ffd around him? Was he a 55cbea1e77 player? His thoughts spiraled. Realizing he was ca608e3e6a overthinking, he noted 081f3b18bc that overthinking led c8bb55e4d5 to negative emotions.84e3d45a297d9f1e
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He analyzed his feelings like studying a character. Why had he become so obsessive? He probably wanted to monopolize Seo Heetae. He wished to get closer and spend more time together. Feeling disappointed, he couldn’t.7e11c16ad7ab7718