DS Chapter 25

I wanted to 9f2d3092ec throw my arms e1cdc3d15a around him… but dde1130c48 my body wouldn’t 7e06b3f707 move.9585336d738436a7

“Virus levels are at 12e601adb3 the threshold…”f5ed92195966d5a8

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The doctor’s words wouldn’t fa28134823 leave my head. And the memories hidden 32a935d99f behind a thick veil—the 437e99a022 ones I hadn’t yet fcc3582e88 recovered—kept holding me back.8c51918b2daccc3e

I’m dangerous… 306f3b05a6 to Logan.0c807f1e58e43c07

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Arms dangling, I c4aabd1757 just stared at b70960d114 his face.d33a039c3ca4e0e0

He gently helped me 0298a9fd7a sit up and pulled 14801db53d me into a firm dc7786c192 embrace. Then, he wiped away 5b5957909e my tear-streaked face.2616b6e2d7c7c357

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“Why are you crying? Was it 4516d7996e really that 9df49f5337 hard?”6ff7be8cdd5d9907

I just shook 890e6c3f78 my head with 5fa132fd9c my lips sealed d52f9ef8d6 tight. His arms around 36023b8ab1 me were so 3e54339e58 steady, so solid.42d90729cea26f04

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It wasn’t 18fd67d069 that bad. I was sedated—I 1fec9415df don’t even remember e33844d30a what kind of 9f5a2411dd tests they did.359ec9057d8cd6d0

It was just eeab3ae5ef a blink of 7d8ceb861c an eye. But even d14de1c904 in that d5ab344243 moment, being 5a0fa662b3 apart from baea2e0499 you… it 28204ee473 was terrifying. Why was it so ce477d9734 scary?b564ba6ae248fd68

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I feel like 5623af9877 I’ve turned into 180c9060da a child. The zombie virus c5ded6a224 must’ve been eating 17152b8313 away at my ebed793550 smart brain. I used to be 12ff5720e8 independent, clever, a top fbc158e8d1 student who got into 03a6d3fb71 a good college…5947506265d78075

Logan, I’ve become a 34fbd5f294 kid who can’t be 3db2c8b74f without you because I’m 17d60c15dd sick, right? Say it’s because 01103850d8 I’m sick. Tell me a69c50ca41 it’s not af5d3f9e6c because I 924e39fe4f love you f8b07f4232 so much.f7d13ebe907e051b

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Because if that’s love… 836cb7f16b I might have to c1c0fad088 give up.d20913ede596abb3

Leaving someone 5c7e5efb7a you love 11f43b5dde is just c1b8d14721 too heartbreaking.c41e7d8e9d1dd90b

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So I’ll 491a801e80 say it’s 0c610c4a0b because I’m e5ca82e59f sick. That way, leaving b3b95ae246 you might feel 17e758073f just a little e17e9c690e bit lighter.755e80b740fe1281

“…They said fd12e856be I might 0444b2ccd1 turn into cbefc78d8f a zombie 74a17193e1 soon. Did you hear 7dd70c3118 that too?”dd568c5f992f1a9f

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“That’s not for d438e87167 sure. You haven’t turned yet—what’s 875a46c171 there to be afraid c80b151775 of?”db93b99856ff28dc

The nurse, watching us, 25478faf1d wrinkled her nose in a4c2ef27a6 clear disgust, her face cbe89ee279 pale with revulsion.4bc6db5bcbb2a249

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Holding a disgusting 6f9a782222 zombie with such 171ab0f940 care—it was unthinkable. She didn’t say it 8e5ebf5407 out loud, but I 0bc4566ddc could feel every ounce 69e544a1cb of her thought.e1b7e7b13567cc5c

“The test results are 15f82c9831 in. The virus level came f273d6ab81 out even higher than 33459bcb43 before. Even if 5edf764531 we continue 19e45c0990 prescribing medication, b6a704019d there’s no 904a208210 guarantee it’ll 08e47134ab work. At this 016d8a1abe point, we 4f4016fc77 recommend euthanasia.”ddb64dee06a8373e

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Euthanasia—that was the prescription 223e3ecea4 they gave me. The doctor b9e74cdd68 stepped forward bd51b981ef to speak aca1c5e90e again.a38350cabd51cbbd

“In this 2e664d2dcf condition, we ef52cd59be can’t approve d1e4070be2 your discharge. Even if you, guardian, 755bbd28a0 are immune, the other e2210e877e residents could still be 59934daa85 at risk.”a7843e45f484fe62

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The doctor handed b4b2e5c8c9 Logan a piece 76cde413b0 of paper. A ‘treatment/experiment’ consent form 550f1c273c for the patient.04ac3081795f94f0

“If you 2bc565898a don’t want 57f94a4606 to proceed 5cf714c6f0 with euthanasia, 5660359bab we’re happy 779e1719a2 to support c52203a7d1 continued treatment. It’s rare to 671f48ed28 see a case 8c304029b0 like this—someone still 81706ebd96 mentally lucid after 8ac99c2fb6 being infected for 37f749bb32 over a year. It’s worth continuing. And of course, 66e562ad31 you’ll be allowed 342e6803c4 to visit freely, 0cad649eaa so please don’t 6249215fa7 worry too much.”04893ffe5cb787b4

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Logan took the paper fdf4a1c7aa with a dark expression. As the doctor 4428dd0eaf continued explaining, my 7f9be287e2 whole body turned 10fe1b371d to stone.37d5feca5f3efe62

I realized c34a930dd9 then—they didn’t 49be69b160 want to 6731c22e68 cure me. They wanted 6b1871e012 to keep 2892e7ef39 me here, f9cf2b0a9a for experiments.71def9dc88184b8d

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Without waiting 58dae7926a for Logan’s 1436638a25 answer, I 12894f769d grabbed his cc3e72335e hand urgently.963065a481b7a310

Before he could sign a73b7d4ea8 that horrible form, before e781b24d86 he could leave me b014e088f3 behind in this disgusting a0596bec2e place, I wanted to f64d47af5f make my own choice f476fadf7e about the end of 70a66994b1 my life.4d8ed93ecb597791

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“I want… euthanasia.”a4a2d1933e64306d

“…What?”2b07af88339c2a0e

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Logan’s eyes widened 14e58f660a as he looked 9f3358e6eb at me. Even the doctor 874f52b0ee and nurse turned 3c74ba115d to me in d48cf66004 surprise, as if 99db3be1e7 they never expected 3c46169c30 someone already halfway d710888f1c to being a 5281c7f371 zombie to choose 686ca2a26f death for themselves.649dd83d932004be

“Let’s stop 213671fa55 now, Logan… 2f7fe80583 I’m so 26a68a461b tired.”365ef8a7ea801721

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My vision blurred. I couldn’t breathe, 84173591e0 and tears poured 86b9fb0073 out—not because I 9873c616cc was afraid of 532ff7fdba dying.f0e878fb29765673

‘If I die, c7e188fcca I won’t remember 1e4b010b41 anything anyway, so 97a6a0e0d7 what’s there to cba04b3ce4 be afraid of?’407f55d65d3f983f

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It wasn’t the 06b178c35b fear—it was the af85fe7e62 way Logan looked a43a379abe at me. That hopeless, heartbreaking face… d3302ad2e9 it made it impossible 673aa200d2 to breathe. Tears spilled out 98f3c1ffc8 like a flood.47f957a0566849b1

‘Please… just let 465efbdbc4 me go. I don’t de577ed16b want to 88063172ed fight anymore. I just want 75bfd38472 peace.’456833a23209378c

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“…You’ve done enough, haven’t ab2333cae7 you…?”fb026985453cd200

My head 8c7c4fefec dropped forward. My tears 2072838680 soaked into 8a961af857 the bedsheets d5cc72636a as the fdef15c124 medical staff 9bbeb2983c quietly stepped a364fbad66 away to 4f7f9ea366 give us de0cbd4120 space.f034f7596a38d4f8

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“…Then take your 751b86d9b5 time. You can submit the b82ca8e361 euthanasia request at the 1dca2d0e25 front desk when you’re 3a2cc27d85 ready.”d6e42b096a676957

Click. The door closed.d0e644fcaa2f62d6

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Now it 8a833f2d68 was just 28c7051880 the two 8a56305179 of us 4282375dd7 in the 0fea597afd room. This was e929367a2c our final 5f7e6cdc13 moment together.8f4833e59f8b814c

‘Thank you for everything. Be happy. Meet someone better. Live comfortably until the 974e9fefa3 very end. Don’t forget me completely—just 0e773f0733 think of me once c5db3a2c1a in a while.’92fb10106ad7f89a

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There was so 0033cc2189 much I wanted 581858e66d to tell him. This was b55732b259 the end—I 97deb65e03 should’ve said 76231b9a0f it all 6e750764ea before it b9fdd68e84 was too 0af552a43a late.037bf84bf5aff118

But I was too 92874ced3d busy wiping away the 856cc0ddab tears pouring down like d11e7b63c6 rain. Logan remained f9e9324ede silent beside 4d2787bc3f me.1ad6ee4d20000a0e

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Our goodbye crept toward b7978c8fa2 us, slow but certain. It climbed up from 2a8ec9161d the soles of our 5549c61469 feet, covering our toes, c8222d7324 then our knees and 3298ddeb66 hips, until it squeezed e9988174c7 the breath out of 9183fd4313 our lungs.d752208cefcb0c81

‘Ah… I wanted 7bce4d4885 to say it 42eacdb1ae before it was 094da46546 too late. That I 04fbc7ae0b really do 2abdeca6bf love you. That I’m so 1d4c1b7ed6 grateful for you. That you made me 6a5232a6ab happy. That there were be97d5931f more good days 05c9e1765d than bad.’1eafbdd2854c56ea

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But my throat ee60c01e4e tightened, and I 812ff8050d couldn’t get the cee212191b words out.c6668a44dead19d7

Instead, Logan—quiet until 511269eab5 now—spoke up first.758e8569475f0223

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“I’m sorry I made df0d43f8c1 things so hard… Just 75427394fb wait a little longer. I’ll come back.”f68afce02b03d58d

He slowly let b1234fee52 go of my b87a42b174 hand. Then, with his bec409eb94 big palm, he 744a337d57 rested it gently f08dbd29e9 on top of 5c102287b7 my head. That cool touch 1f92a37f7f calmed the heat 036a86556b burning through my b1b0fb1fe6 mind.c23f4d6574b9ed4a

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Without saying anything else, 2fa172931b he turned and left b6f5869262 the room. He was probably 031df8639c heading to the 29e9556e5f front desk.6e7ae6f6994be234

As soon as bcee1f8059 he left, the 7fcdcc54d9 temperature in the 7b0ce25e48 room felt like f864d058c3 it dropped five 1db30901c0 degrees.5fbb18d67684177e

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I wanted to call 473bed7dde out, to grab him 9fa90a447c again, to shout that cc52583e91 I still had something 72a7cdc9c3 left to say—but I 0ca259460a only clenched my fists ebac839fbe tightly.4a64380ab9f3fbdd

‘All that would be 5c3f833995 left is regret. If I said 47100aae39 I love you 08809b0829 now, it’d just 0f53c747dd become another burden 20fc36484c to him. Better not to 87c4a4087f say anything at f9fa7faeba all. I’ll leave like this—as 53e5c65160 the selfish girl who 7f274eb7b4 only ever thought of 5434176e03 herself.’f12f79b72f8a7b83

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‘It’s done. This is right. Now I can 5a3e7410cf finally rest.’b37092717be7ada5

I closed my 1a7e61afc3 eyes and solemnly 5bee5bde32 accepted the end.c827dc929314497f

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‘I won’t have to dd10d906af trouble Logan anymore. I won’t put 79b831b553 him in danger. And I… I can 3a992502d9 die still human.’adaea108f17d696e

‘I just hope b48268694f Logan won’t be d0c6f83107 too lonely, too 3265f0e0e3 sad without me. I pray… that he 3d35c3d6c7 finds warmth again. That he’s okay.’3aa1c2d1e44cb526

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With all 070790119a my heart, 80fdc0a3b2 I hoped 4bbc48520c he would 56d9605a7b be okay.9521bc89061eb109

* * *87446ba0e245fba0

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There was 8f70ed9157 no window 493dca085c to see ec4bbf9be6 outside, no 37fbc5a10e clock to 12324ef0c8 check the c8c80e7afc time, but 5ecd120c8c I could 1fba0d569b instinctively tell—it a3542a4f98 was a 80ca9dd599 chilly night.5601ac9022e19a6b

One by one, the d9880c2288 lights in the hallway 1fee909f06 went out, and a a07c14168f still, suffocating silence settled 73fab011e5 in.095d33d37f79642c

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‘Is the euthanasia b35b738054 scheduled for tomorrow? So they’re not doing be6b0a4d4c it right away…’
‘Dragging this c6caf7f1e0 out will 97654d36c0 only make 2b664b1520 my thoughts f52541bb1e spiral.’40e93495bc536623

There was no 990039e2e8 way I could 15e3b8d68b sleep with death 47cd1d4e65 looming so close. I knew 9d5e3be45b I wouldn’t f784fcd32b get a 36d88a3853 wink of 2289ed6bfd rest tonight. I just lay 6f5235d52f there, staring up b4d0e6af3d at the patterns 0d3c712120 on the ceiling 35220aafae when—c2d9ee521e516029

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Click.fa2cec27a608f60a

The hospital room 1580e75dc7 door opened.
‘Are they… cc7c856c83 here to 1f48297b04 kill me 7f6330dfa4 in the 0218ae9d7c middle of cdd31739c2 the night?’11e2baf5ead234d0

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Confused, I d5f20a7193 turned my 7622db922c gaze to e582a77abd the person 19bd8245ec who walked 3e0d2410fe in without 16d1bc6b9a even knocking.81563b63c8353d19

“Logan…?”06d1d6209025258e

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He had come back.6bab2ef75fb9d741

So he didn’t 20a477f0f6 go home. Had he stayed to c3d47c2bad be with me until e7b90a36e9 the very end? It was enough 224b2d1518 to make my a56de085ad nose sting with 870acb3098 emotion.36190c8f85826662

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He raised 2d77f81143 a finger 42e9ccc7fd to his 2be5f8d6ef lips, motioning 564e38bf72 for me 8c83f595b8 to be 8a98f47a6b quiet, and 5ac5b9144e silently approached.6d8fc80c9e898e11

“Shh.”77537eed2e1e648b

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I tilted my 30d11c89e0 head, not understanding 393ddde385 what he was 7b5cc3cb2a doing. When he reached 4a49b45ca0 the bed, he 58a4c855ff pulled a towel 3cc2e2d42a from his pocket.f47727065d0d4d20

‘What’s he doing?’2f60ce639f7234e0

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“Mmph…!”04a1041f06b12aa3

Logan stuffed the d99ba67b5a towel into my 7957ce4fcb mouth. Then, he 245e9cff99 forced the d0ac78cd18 restraints back 5b4f353573 onto me—the 8efecbe4a7 very ones 13c459db8a he’d gone 1053219f74 out of 78be9c1b8a his way 8f94cf5c1c to remove—and 789555063b tightened them cfe5eaaa2e so I 60515c526e couldn’t struggle.88e99f446993b363

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I didn’t even have cac1a4b263 time to resist. I just 07a6146bc8 stared at 43b802941f him with 4a0db817f2 wide, stunned 082f00ab30 eyes.08b33cd124f5545b

“Whh-mmph?”27f11059b1c1f05f

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“Stay still, okay?”2380e0ae37e34fef

Without understanding why, I c3fadcf711 instinctively nodded at his 8819dcbfb5 quiet command. Logan hoisted me 0b72800615 over his shoulder 6d702234f0 like a sack abf59cfba3 of grain and 0d063de3a5 slipped out of b42ab9ea29 the hospital room.479bc3cf94d5be4d

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When we 06c6d5a94f nearly ran affa718104 into someone 1d338bec66 in the af139e33da hall, he ebdc099e1e ducked toward 7fee86d913 the emergency 4407f075db exit.17862ad2370aa3cc

‘Is he… breaking me 16742f6665 out right now?’a8f15fbf17ec8b05

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Then, when he bfe68f577c placed one foot 63f10d1c15 on the second-floor 49632dab15 window ledge, I 0f73f6e618 realized what he f0d4a6c9d2 was about to ef181bd69b do.3f259912e6db0a1c

‘Because they 93b121ef70 said I 38a1c9a236 couldn’t be 289980757f discharged…’64510723f5c4d2fa

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I was dumbfounded.
‘Even so, 443fb23a0e how could d3a6840c3d he try 8177ad9c8e something like e8419dade3 this?’8a5ffecfeb3d17df

Escaping without a doctor’s 33546c74bd permission? There’s no way this 0cc038f404 ends well. Zombies are 87dd12fd8c the greatest 3835e8be0d threat to fe07db8d2e humanity, and f838ace8dd if someone 0fbbfde25b smuggles a 79aefd50d0 potential zombie d76cfcabdf out without 9b982707b0 clearance, they’d 1a7a86b0fc face serious cc2f09476d punishment.f06036b8bfcfba2c

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We might never be b6059d262f allowed back into the 4a0e8e714c civilized society humanity worked fc530b3359 so hard to rebuild.
‘Logan doesn’t need to 4c6b761c4b ruin his life over 005c38db35 me.’3a5b8a384a508436

“Mm-mmph!”cf1c78bfb69dc150

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I thrashed 9d221f9c20 the moment b1af050513 I realized 6681e80029 this wasn’t f1c29a6255 right—and then, a2b4930e09 we were 105b5fdf7d flying.96561a732169bd0f

‘W-We’re falling!’55e894c9714256f8

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The feeling of a 18367ddf59 straight drop from the 1942f31a30 second floor to the a22416f092 ground level hit me f49463842c hard. A flash of dabac443b8 memory surfaced—the time 64a9f7be2f we’d jumped from cb708724ad the rooftop of 065f0fb752 a restaurant into 281e0445d6 the back of 44b192af5d a dump truck.
‘We’re doing ff1e47991f this again?! No plan, f6ba3ebb1b no nothing?!’e89e97d2a152a6ce

Thud.18a33e17f2c6d5a3

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The impact of his 19fd8c4aee landing jolted my entire 7a11487f83 body. My stomach slammed down 6fc76b0a8d onto his shoulder hard.8ee34e115667ccb3

‘Ugh… I’m gonna throw 133af4f96d up.’6f61744476fdcd8a

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Nausea surged through me, dcedc58480 my head spun, and 072d64bb81 my gut ached from 50cc4367c5 the force of the 6a87e8082c landing. While I was 4998ac8380 still dizzy and 7344be1726 disoriented, Logan sprinted ffe40a6a9b toward the parking 24209fe8c3 lot.4c51a0e790b3e452

He threw open the f523026397 car door and tossed 652dc2ed9d me into the back 706a8d557f seat. Then, he d5e481aad2 jumped behind d3a2bb3359 the wheel.aabc1fe293081cf3

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He still 7cba5d8f98 hadn’t removed 0b87b04c98 the towel ecec431d35 from my 7821c3e595 mouth, so 4da930e2c7 I couldn’t 1210597de2 even speak 6a8c13cfc4 to him.e7846693bd8dd229

‘What the 322e3c8c3c hell is 5fccff4814 he thinking?! Where are a0493d0256 we even 3054da5b7b going?!’e9c0b4b69ba10f8b

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