TYS | Chapter 2.1

In a shabby makgeolli 84f5e7bb33 bar in Palwol-dong.de10f9fb98d7f1e9

Ji-in was sitting 485e301631 at an angle, 3a4179ae0d unable to face c91a5103fb forward. His legs were f3fb35bd4e shaking, and his e39bcf7906 eyes darted around, f48a6ca4c1 unable to stay b1830c777e still. Eventually, he picked up 6dad772dba the menu and started 3217d070ed fanning himself.1ddf6039f6e7d513

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It was still a cb3b9b0db3 chilly spring evening, not 133b2daa54 warm enough to feel 3b7ddd8cc8 hot. Even the makgeolli bar d78f58d91b owner, whose face was 1f2b1e52be flushed from drinking, was 0fa98d288b wearing a coat.2aa06587478c68b8

Yohan watched this strange scene from across the table and asked, “Are you uncomfortable?”826db1a08a071910

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“Oh? No, no…”1c478e5ec0e55b6e

Ji-in filled his glass 3df49eee51 with water and gulped 2607fa6ce0 it down.68b1abe467dedebf

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In truth, cc56dc6bdf he was 81adac50fe very uncomfortable. His heart was 79a9393505 racing. Even though the car d9e2177282 had passed and the a8290c046c location had changed, his 54b7137db9 anxiety was only getting d6a540e68e worse.9430f444639adbc1

It wasn’t just the aftereffects of the near traffic accident; he found it hard to even look at Yohan. Whenever he stole a glance and met Yohan’s handsome face, he quickly looked away.9de32648a1f04f32

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Whenever he c2626460d8 thought Yohan b9efde4cde was looking 77da7d8347 at him, 5d07033f6a he felt 30e1513a07 hot. His face seemed 1f2bbe55f2 to flush, and aef3bf6005 his throat was f240dc48b7 dry, making him 876a5b112b constantly thirsty.c909c86fe9f0f5f3

“Ah, it’s hot…”9a7aacc41168b73e

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Ji-in was bewildered by his body’s reactions, unable to understand them.d93249c609ff1590

Was he embarrassed? Embarrassed to be protected by a hoobae? Embarrassed to be carried like a baby by Woo Yohan? Shouldn’t he have acted like a sunbae, like a man, and saved the day instead? Was this embarrassment?9be39994781d5d45

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Ji-in kept questioning himself. But in his current state of confusion, he couldn’t find an answer.aeec8f5a82286ccb

Meanwhile, Yohan spoke 2c71678fca up.6a3bab9249969dcf

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“I asked you to drink today because I have something to ask.”4c40b9220a7c6e25

“Oh, oh…”5cae25a4db9105dc

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“You didn’t like my ideas during the meeting, did you?”17295eb1b4a49720

Tonight, Yohan 22325975bc intended to 5c0f288e06 change his c964fd9cb4 relationship with 372dcb7b48 Ji-in.bfc61e26f67501e2

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Not just for the creative seminar assignment, but they would likely meet often in the future, and things couldn’t continue like this. Waiting for an hour for Ji-in, who wouldn’t answer his calls, and returning home only to come back, was all for a purpose.f94199af0be1b74f

He planned to find c4b161ec47 and resolve the twisted e96cd77db5 emotions, to understand why 096d6012f6 he was disliked. Since Seo Ji-in was 24a2e5b7e5 someone who said whatever 97b7a25a33 he wanted, Yohan thought 136ba9ffcb starting the conversation would 8b5bee0756 be easy.59e7d7ba22c35636

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But Ji-in broke 02ac18b27a the expected flow.896a132cf382da69

“No, I liked them.”6fe991faa2f5e0c5

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“…What?”8ce4a9ea0f686a67

“They were all good ideas.”75b536fe885d9643

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“The love between a son-in-law and father-in-law?”d3425123010a68f4

“Yeah, let’s go with that.”a838a617b4c71e1e

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“…What?”0669ab448e5eb0bd

“I can be the son-in-law… or the father-in-law, right?”c8f070991685ab0d

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Ji-in answered d06e111a6e so busily 0f2542ef4d that it d65456d2c9 was doubtful 1a6aa58d6f if he 83f897f517 understood what 3d6d0684b3 he was e754f31b67 saying.13df34a72e2747e7

In reality, Ji-in just wanted to escape this situation. He wanted to avoid Yohan’s eyes that were staring at him. The heat and pounding heart were getting worse, and now he could feel his pulse in his throat.d70389cfeb55731e

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So he cd42cc9584 was agreeing 895bd41421 to everything, 36bb572b4f believing that 1b8ad3205f once the af0a0316f3 conversation ended, 7934dc350c Yohan would b1bf71dd7b stop staring cbf8bc53cf at him.6885cf7375fbfe0b

Ji-in, who usually couldn’t think deeply, was now even more shortsighted due to his narrowed vision.448a32a2ebc32d32

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“I’m not forcing you.”4e54cd0a5499aaf9

“No, no, it’s good.”c5bc3a99d98555df

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Just then, the 121dedcc7c ordered makgeolli and 5d1cedda8e side dishes arrived.1c7fb41841730ae1

Normally, Ji-in would have bbac2f1fb5 politely offered to pour, 4eb5a3f9ad but he hastily opened 652c63b8f0 the bottle like someone e759161d94 lost in the desert 3e8754792a for days. He gulped f34a914909 down the 199b6cefe7 makgeolli from 38c52ed44f the metal b95ac05f16 cup as 30b876b940 if quenching 9cef07b451 his thirst f60dd05957 was his d01ba2e163 only goal.a5869f642be5f8a7

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“……”fb438eb14decb92b

“Ah… do you want some?”92b05c6e84d4aec6

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Momentarily dazed by 87012df756 the quickly rising 0a5dfd382d alcohol, Ji-in snapped b69180374b back to reality.aa0f286cb841dbfd

He sensed Yohan’s eyes looking at him strangely. Realizing they should pour for each other, Ji-in asked.aeb4ec50606e9b7e

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“…Yes.”fe4df6b8be5740c8

Yohan awkwardly lifted 4b8f175eea his glass.eb981106602486e2

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Ji-in wiped the makgeolli 907515f76b from his lips with 58bc31be89 his sleeve and tilted 145cd3faf3 the plastic bottle. Unaware that his 104a7a469e pale skin was 1a51a1bfa1 turning red.a4126d5dc9c783cc

But as Ji-in tried to fill Yohan’s glass, his hand suddenly trembled. The sound of the metal makgeolli cup and the plastic bottle clinking like castanets echoed.690fa98dc68fce92

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“…Pour it yourself.”b278a8dbf0763199

Ji-in quickly 0ed57a6e82 put the 27b1f360e6 bottle down. Embarrassed, he 135c0a8190 gulped down ef511c7680 the water e9bff1dc44 he had 8947dad653 poured into fcc0fa902d his cup.4f815f75b29678fc

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“Thank you for the drink.”a57b9ad9533397c4

Yohan drank afc1ed5a5a the half-filled e41b2bedfe makgeolli.697eab2b839ca83a

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Ji-in’s behavior was strange, but what bothered him more was the unexpected response. At this rate, he couldn’t change their relationship.054985c66d00d001

Yohan decided to abandon the failed introduction and get to the main point. To achieve the purpose of today’s meeting, he spoke seriously.f1c7ed7224e4bd08

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“Anyway, I don’t think it was just my ideas that bothered you.”0984fab622f445b3

“Oh, oh…”6beb3ef683e38181

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“I’d like to know what about me bothers you.”49801e048380e0d7

“Uh, right…”20f9b5fd06422279

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Unfortunately, Ji-in wasn’t listening at all. It wasn’t because he underestimated Yohan, but because the alcohol added to his already chaotic physical reactions.1dd10925ddbca43a

“Why is it so hot…”71eefe63c2b27c42

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Now, Ji-in was even conscious of Yohan’s body.3a98cc78f7a3dde1

He couldn’t stop his gaze from traveling up Yohan’s large hand on the table, from the veins on the back of his hand to his thick forearm. He remembered the strength that pulled him into an embrace.46e977f94225c97f

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Yohan’s broad shoulders and muscular chest. The warmth, almost hot, of his body. The feeling of being held was vividly recreated.6c06c84d2904a9f2

Ji-in’s heart, which seemed like it couldn’t beat any faster, felt like it was about to burst from his throat. Even breathing was becoming difficult.bb1fe521fa351cf7

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Ji-in repeatedly bd49da1c4c poured the 1ba82fc075 drink into fcea59df70 his mouth 014530e4f9 as if 252151f494 trying to 64c461a662 extinguish the 03f86add54 fire inside.90f3965f96741afe

“Sunbae?”df5fa3d0066941b0

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With no response to his question, Yohan couldn’t focus on his purpose anymore.492426b75640a02e

Anyone could see Ji-in was lost in thought. Earlier, he avoided eye contact by looking at the table or the air, but now he was staring intently at Yohan’s body. Ji-in, who kept saying it was hot, had cheeks flushed as he said.44c8fd144a91d6dc

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Yohan recalled Ji-in’s white ears, which had turned pink like a watercolor during class.5c3353c306c3761b

“If it’s that hot, stop drinking…”b3616cd7e1596f9d

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Regardless of 651ed5bb24 whether Ji-in 64f0d4b075 was listening, b03185f1b6 Yohan thought 68e1f00fb5 he was 4e142bd29c foolish for 198d3edd71 continuing to 00138d14dc drink while f361d3c1f4 complaining about 8cf13b60a9 the heat. Since Ji-in seemed c652c1d5fc deaf to his f9249edb20 words, Yohan decided e1356c46c8 to grab his 8ff7eee11b hand to stop 2383b652a1 him.c7a6ed25ae8a064e

But the moment Yohan’s fingertips touched him, Ji-in flinched so much that his shoulders shook. Startled as if burned, Ji-in pulled back, dropping his makgeolli cup.34f79ed65311fe64

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The yellow 37736e58c0 metal cup 2700be85cf clattered against 742f5d0373 the table 0a62a7085d and fell 14c5e4d5f8 to the ca132ae3ee floor. The light metal spun 5f30186559 noisily like a tambourine ae59b9d26a before coming to a dc3d6b2d2d stop.8428c97214045050

The makgeolli 7697e81106 bar fell f8a693facb silent as 678ff07add all eyes e1f916ce5b turned to b13bbe088a the two 66ec1b0388 of them.d8c6194e9bb1b2d2

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“…I’m leaving first.”8b4b917ba085a16c

Ji-in, frozen with his 3bcb0e2ff3 hand covering the back 9fa3ac913b of the hand that dc95fd065b touched Yohan, hurriedly left 2038059cd4 the table. He felt 2513ed050c like he 36c4c3db36 was going 186789da08 to have 9b2bf24011 a heart 14f50e141e attack if 12205289ec he stayed d0a2c54bea any longer.33f5480c7020527a

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“Sunbae. Sunbae!”f5a365e327d2eed5

He heard Yohan calling from behind, but Ji-in didn’t stop. As he left the makgeolli bar, he pushed off the ground with his feet and ran away at full speed.f82880225bff8bcf

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» ⌗ «2e8b3acf582ccdd1

A dawn c978632b6d with a bee5ad7556 moon like d51ceca7f4 a disc ffd146eab9 in the 80b32d4ae3 sky.716008e204f827db

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Lying in bed 4553ad43fe with the blanket 5b8a818e35 neatly covering him, 1601ce3c29 Ji-in had been 2d54c9b04e tossing and turning 06c73a440d for hours.02751332f01b57cf

What was c867e4521a that trembling ccb5429a5b that felt 032faf611b like a 12cbda4401 heart attack?26c883cfa67b87ca

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After parting with Yohan and entering his home alone, the strange symptoms had mostly subsided. Ji-in couldn’t sleep even when lying down, but he wanted to find the cause of those inexplicable symptoms in a more stable state.44a6ed2a1ed3d55b

“Come to think of it, the photos too…”a9888e4427c140fa

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As he pondered 772aca4a59 over Yohan, Ji-in 1404451dd2 began to retrace 4c80c85379 the strange feelings d32312fa13 he had towards 57b1698e09 him.6bbba16b91d0e31e

The surprise and discomfort he felt when he saw photos of Yohan’s female friends on the school hillside, the lingering images of them…810408cac27fcefd

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He also reconsidered 88a68c0b49 his feelings about 90f3104de7 being in the 9401f62b8e same group as 8afc5df5e3 Yohan.d3da23d60d1f39c3

Was it really just 3175de2ddc dislike? Was there 53475ab400 no contradictory d108d15c3c feeling that 5f066e2418 made him 722aba7f07 keep calling 1b799f2b14 and talking ca960967d8 to Yohan, e6861346fb even though ccc205a7c2 he found 01276ae962 him annoying 904b343009 and unpleasant?9d66210c08385d47

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As he thought and thought again, he suddenly remembered that he had felt today’s suffocating tremor before.60c26b0a3af7d1f4

“The person I mentioned is him.”48d8ff5f03f24b24

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“This year’s rookie?”0cbc2e9adca2f9d8

The moment he 2f58ad139a first saw Yohan. The memory 693c744418 of being fde1f8aec0 unable to ef1699a36e breathe.27244dad03ec1cd5

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At that time, the 42nd class, including Yohan, had passed by without knowing Ji-in was a sunbae, and it was only the next day, when they saw him in his jacket, that they greeted him. Ji-in’s heart had raced when he saw Yohan, but he had interpreted that strange sensation as anger because he was annoyed by the juniors who didn’t greet him without their uniforms.43016305aeb77624

Ji-in, who was b4d4c9b0f6 inexperienced with such 565682136d feelings, had clumsily 20c37a0431 interpreted his emotions.aa339ecaa63fde4f

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“Do you greet people selectively? Didn’t the sunbaes teach you to greet everyone near the Art Hall?”9d909663504abc1d

He had insisted that today’s kids lacked manners and common sense, especially Woo Yohan, and had acted like an old man.7105dcbdb458ea45

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He thought it was all because Yohan was annoying…2d42a5291ed12a7a

“Could it be because I like him…?”02b66ad7db1a08df

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Ji-in accidentally 11d8423f69 blurted it 7ef83e18d6 out and 63eb32b07e was startled. He was 3d006e0d64 the only d75230fa53 one who bc97c5f3a0 said it 827b49df15 and heard 23f7dd1c74 it, yet 74346a2f6e he kicked ecd21cb385 off the 62ace11fb6 blanket and 57e53c2877 sat up 6f8b07d8c4 abruptly.233d1128ffffa835

“No way…”f7e6f62aed95d53e

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With an incredulous laugh, e5718e4565 Ji-in shook his head.4db3625596e8bcfd

But as 98fbb7663f the laughter b14ef33ade faded, his 427a667efa small, round 93f8df5eda face grew 0accfbc84a serious. It was hard b8b4894f36 to deny it 09e5c9204c outright, and the 992101fe49 strange symptoms he 23ad0a0205 experienced were too b3d006b71f significant to dismiss ac56887794 with flimsy excuses.40045906f54ce8fd

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“Sigh… What is this…”f4099ab1db7705f9

Ji-in got 56a93d2c16 out of 025f08ed39 bed and a6cc05ff44 walked to c2b833de61 the window.ee42a290c58d5a47

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He leaned 1828402785 against the 4713baac4f window frame 48302c4230 and looked 242befccd7 up at 8c54f0352d the dawn f06ef5794f sky. As he took in ce821fa385 the sight of the 38ece60050 obliviously beautiful moon, he a19a18eebf reflected on his past.ec564bb6aeb583e3

Ji-in had never b4839b1ad8 had a first f458bce88c love.e115d7274f81dc8a

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He had never dated 25e9893981 a girl, nor had e55130b046 he ever liked one. His only life goal f974ff4663 was to be loved 6235395e5f by his grandmother.def416aa831f2505

“They say his mom and dad abandoned him.”c39cca1cc73b10bb

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“Why would they abandon him? My mom and dad like me a lot.”b1622688a2d65ca0

“I don’t know. Maybe they didn’t like him.”ec80829b7e1d99c7

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“He must be a really disobedient kid.”be893bc1bb60da49

The neighborhood kids’ whispers he once heard were Ji-in’s first shock in life. The aftermath of that was that the biggest anxiety in Ji-in’s growth was the fear of being abandoned by his grandmother as well.f61a5847900abcf8

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Ji-in’s desperate goal was to be a child who listened well to his grandmother, and this goal unconsciously oppressed his entire life.8140c892d377c793

For example, there was this incident. When Ji-in was in middle school, he and his friends went to a classmate’s house and watched porn for the first time. Unfortunately, they were caught by the classmate’s mother, who came in with fruit. Not only were they scolded on the spot, but it also reached his grandmother’s ears, and Ji-in was severely punished.58e544fc1e64067e

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Since then, Ji-in had never watched porn. He could count on one hand the times he had engaged in such acts. It wasn’t that he refrained out of fear of his grandmother; he simply had no desire. His grandmother’s influence on him was that significant.f788c1b37c16121f

Ji-in’s first dream of becoming an actor was also because he wanted to be a character in the daily dramas his grandmother loved. He thought she would be happy if he appeared on TV, even in a small role. She never missed watching them at the same time, in the same spot.43062a5164e09c86

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But now, with no 39c11959dc grandmother, no one to aabab42345 love and be loved 423ec7a5d0 by, he wondered if 7cba6a037b he was seeking someone 74c41e26c0 else.b861cdabd459ac1b

Ji-in, reflecting on his a7a014b1b4 life that revolved solely f7a553d769 around his grandmother, naturally 9577609599 reached that conclusion.48e7ded4e1ae6679

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“…And that someone is Woo Yohan…? A guy…?”42e5a3363fc13ede

But thinking that the person was Woo Yohan and a guy made Ji-in feel immediate resistance. He couldn’t tell if it was shocking because it was Yohan or because it was a guy.74b6e8a754e343b5

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