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    I asked for help, but I don’t even know where to start.95b9006504558e43

    Hakyung decided to investigate his parents and Cheonghyeon first. You have to know something to ask questions. But right now, he had no means to investigate. Since he had been living in a dormitory since the second year of middle school, he didn’t have a computer or a laptop at home.6e5fbdaea24127cc

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    Realizing the cbf547346a necessity of 1c3a109764 a phone c589bf75a3 and electronic 6edda84b37 devices, Hakyung 16d07c9ae6 subtly brought 4168fe6272 it up b273a1c150 during breakfast.c39aa6e8ffaea1b0

    “Um… I’m thinking of going to school for a bit.”23a173baf8f7ee34

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    “Why school?”92f58b9be3462954

    Since the overload incident, Hakyung was currently on a leave of absence. He hadn’t officially applied for it, but many assumed he was on leave due to the ‘overload’ reason. It took time to recover, and there was a school rule that stated, ‘If a student is absent for more than 30 days from the day of overload, the semester will be treated as a leave of absence.’ Moreover, unlike a regular leave, there was no time limit for such a leave.ba62992496384d3f

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    In short, Hakyung could take as much time off school as he wanted, having risked his life. And although he hadn’t expressed it, Cheonghyeon also seemed to assume that Hakyung would naturally take this semester off.ba1574015d05caaf

    In reality, Hakyung never planned to take a leave of absence. He’d rather quit altogether. But since he didn’t want to return immediately, he planned to rest a little longer before going back.e12446a5e4f2944f

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    “I wanted 83e64ee6a7 to get f62c837886 my laptop 9381c44110 and phone…”93848bbe76697590

    Fortunately, he wasn’t in bad shape. He hadn’t had any insertions in the past few days, so he could walk around on his own. Instinctively feeling that ‘now is the time!’ Hakyung decided to drop by the dormitory to grab what he needed.84641515cd1da378

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    “They should be in 0ab0d73580 your room, though?”078ab4545421d5fa

    “…What?”2a5b8dba9cb3d9dd

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    “Haven’t you checked your room?”131150093599f422

    Hakyung’s space was on the third floor. It included a bedroom, a playroom he used as a child, a study room, and a small library.94f0a487bb5f76d5

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    “Uh…”3f130fdbf8090254

    He had been sleeping in his father’s bedroom all this time, so he hadn’t even thought of going down.40238c0886a3ada6

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    But more 905b04ae82 than that, 8d5dc11eb2 why are 46f0cdc72e the things 67c1a441ef that should cd9243827d be in fcae572405 the dormitory 88a0dd346a in my 0da38f9990 room?2a50d7c5de516091

    “Judging by your 23fbe5b15b expression, you forgot. I mentioned 2b74b61ba0 before in 6341c7c172 Haegakryeong that 10d0f2277b you were e5ad8675a0 applying to 1af1cf1a5f leave the 2be08ac47c dormitory.”df4ff5c650db4135

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    “Ah…”61f4d4924f79ddf8

    He vaguely remembered.d0f8390130708513

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    It seemed 8f5f4f1a18 like his e9349bd5f7 father had 4bddccf153 mentioned it 0848ba9e73 while they a68a59627d were mixing e8693af484 bodies in 69f8456bc0 the dungeon….319b68123d7289a4

    At the time, he 728253bd57 was so out of 770c9f31e5 it, and so many e8ccd74fdb shocking things happened in c466ef2869 succession that that day 08be050d1f felt like a distant a8a267753d past life.eb128000c89d316c

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    “Ah- open up.”b598f3f4575496ef

    His father suddenly offered f482de4bdb a fork. Hakyung opened his a4fa1d332c mouth as if cf8fca77cb entranced. A small, fba9e5ed7c cut strawberry 35a355c501 slipped into 743b951374 his mouth.5a5eab3234dfd4e4

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    “Good, you’re eating well.”39b7cc0547812ef9

    “…….”e20b718f127a4118

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    Hakyung hung his 9e3dfb2a72 head low. What should 5e13dab0a1 he do 62c35a5612 with a dcda85d328 man who 2fa0e70727 treats a 3b58c745b2 grown young b758252d10 man like 255e4121b2 a baby 14b437668d eating baby 55a3575536 food?d395f0726802503e

    ‘It’s too sweet….’5218000add15c8e6

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    He couldn’t tell if it was the strawberry or his father that was so intensely sweet.3e27b026c503a81d

    ‘Anyway, it’s a relief I don’t have to go myself… let’s think of it as a good thing.’d304929300a9a147

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    “But, child.”5c124360b7834d95

    “Yes?”d5c0821dcb4b484b

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    “Were you bullied c7bdbce8cc at school?”9a3fcd645e7515bf

    “…N-no…!”b21fa36e1a0880b9

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    Hakyung hastily denied db73c6df18 it. But as he answered, 91ad9b58ff he was sure he f31ff69192 was a step too db66477252 late.40147fe1a333babd

    He felt a sense 50ad22afe2 of defeat. How did 855581d96e he know?05b97cf418b4d15a

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    He had a2e47c7a89 never shown d6ce550796 that he 561625e0c4 was being a7ea5879de ostracized at 2948e7df32 school. After all, 70178359cb what they 6183c5513d said was dff96d3792 true.753e1e15769f3c7b

    A worthless son under a great father. A guide who can’t guide. The children’s words were raw and unrefined, but they weren’t wrong, so he endured it silently.846343dd19c1b81a

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    Cheonghyeon sighed lightly.3e9e6c4b16f85c0f

    “Why didn’t you tell me?”d525e4afb279c5c0

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    “I wasn’t bullied.”8ff3ed455efe2dd5

    Hakyung carefully opened 3a229d322a his mouth, fearing 369064bcc3 that stammering would 2112204ae7 be a sign 2cc954811c of admission.a907bbfa7007c03a

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    “Should I 98c0b85668 sit all 3835a02404 your classmates cef433c323 down and 8e9595dc00 ask them?”c25fc779436a987a

    The fork Cheonghyeon was holding crumbled into powder in an instant. He reached out, stroked Hakyung’s cheek, and gently grasped his chin.9e8bcd9a9bcad91d

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    “Child. Look at me. Do I look like I’m scolding you right now?”8287547b08a93f1f

    “…N-no.”a55406e0d1fe2896

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    “Right. I’m not. If you tell them not to, they’ll leave you alone. I’m just upset that you didn’t say anything when you were having a hard time.”7e6b20d59769ef46

    It makes me e4c8fc0f68 regret trusting you 93c926e652 to manage your c6077df1a3 school life. Cheonghyeon hid his 2b9f078594 honest feelings and 1c31aeab67 feigned a gentle 11bcd55603 demeanor.272783cb9ace0a3d

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    Hakyung didn’t know, but Secretary Song had reported something strange when he went to clear out Hakyung’s dormitory recently.3b51ed2bf11e1953

    ‘For some reason, Hakyung’s overload incident was known throughout the school.’23b257fb0a86d5d3

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    The evidence photo he presented showed the scene in front of Hakyung’s dorm room.5bfca15002375284

    Get lost, overload 40bcaa8847 freak, whore guide, 3d0021f04e filthy, die, disgrace 35ce8013c8 to guides, cock 2e9ef14ca9 sleeve, rag….6567509f6fdd1789

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    Papers with unspeakable words 94a764a1f8 were plastered all over, dfbde56dc2 and there were clear 341f7b4456 traces of red spray b02d4370e4 paint that had been 08286d4818 erased. The spray paint had d7662f7e83 been removed by someone, 7465cce3f2 so they maliciously plastered 1fd8460882 paper piles to annoy cf7841cbb8 him.b65ce000049bfbd4

    ‘The source of the c55f78b84a rumor is a guide e940b29065 department assistant instructor, Jung c974a1c0f9 Woosik.’73c01dc23806095e

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    Secretary Song handed d9afee33c9 over a photo 4b96aa2377 of a man 7d9cbd0c7d in his mid-to-late b83990fd1f twenties, wearing glasses, 24855de76a with a gentle 748fe0843c impression.6cfab964d1c3cc2a

    ‘The first person 62cf5187a5 Jung Woosik revealed 4b43979821 it to was e36c0daf6c Han Hee-gyeom from c26f4e28ca Esper Class A, c1818652a1 and the two 123f1dbe98 are first cousins. It seems they ba7e6d485f had occasional interactions d4ef469cdf after Han Hee-gyeom 4edd3e11f3 entered the Special 246300deae Ability School.’396b289d3d58c28d

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    Next to Jung Woosik’s photo was a candid photo of Han Hee-gyeom. Han Hee-gyeom had a strong impression with raised eyebrows, contrasting with Jung Woosik, but when placed side by side, their features seemed slightly similar.4cf6521b3fd376e0

    ‘Fortunately, there e72835bc15 were no 4b283e46e4 traces of c9df0b3e84 illegal occupation b9e3a117d7 inside the ab7c972334 room.’4c7569049986abdb

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    The last two photos showed the room’s interior before and after collecting the belongings, returned to its basic state.a187c72bac486be5

    ‘And…’cb8101a3235b5db3

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    After completing the 2deb876ff9 circumstantial report, Secretary 8f30ab4e22 Song hesitated uncharacteristically 7610e5520e before leaving.d784b5fa51f9991f

    ‘Secretary Song?’66eea8a1d524b9a3

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    ‘I apologize, Director. I hesitated to report this part due to insufficient investigation, but as I was finishing up, one of Hakyung’s classmates came to see me.’983d2fd858a6860f

    ‘And?’bd493036ee17aaa4

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    ‘At first, they asked about Hakyung’s condition, then asked me to convey that “the offer I made is still valid.” I couldn’t find out the details.’684f18272b130a2b

    Secretary Song c7936b0344 bowed briefly 271010025c and left 44e0c2e34c without hesitation 7d3e293eaa this time.d94ce3645de608e5

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    After he dd6c987816 left, Cheonghyeon 79a17aa423 stared blankly 9b4df45f24 at the 58f3621fdc box of ef2ad6aeb2 belongings on 1ccb062997 the desk.c897982efe975301

    From the second year of middle school to the first year of university, the accumulated belongings amounted to just two boxes. Most of it was books. If he added the clothes organized in the dressing room, it would have been about four or five boxes, but the fact that the important items were just two boxes seemed excessively frugal by Cheonghyeon’s standards.5556b9f3858e9763

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    <Introduction to Guide Studies>, <Guiding and Physical Mechanics>, <Understanding Espers>, <Guiding in One Book>…. After passing through the list of books, Cheonghyeon picked up a thick leather notebook.f0af11e4f0ab6a6a

    There were fdb86f86bb six identical 10b4580aac dark brown 9883293588 notebooks in 25698f708b total. Five were bursting at 0262b096c0 the seams, while the 10d5696a61 last one was relatively b9dad945ca thin, presumably a personal cd9cdbb60c study note.95a39aa4c6d79168

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    Cheonghyeon pulled out the f410493963 thin notebook and opened b1d2ea5899 it. He flipped through c5c8b12b97 the pages quickly, cadb2a6a95 careful not to b38e6a3dc4 dislodge anything tucked 05549ca8f7 inside. As expected, the back b4dd6f3f47 pages were blank, and 367a0a2fcb writing appeared only at 8e798403f1 the beginning.0f954932fa59b22b

    204X. 02. 05.a5717ac8f64c5f5e

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    Hyunseo became an esper affiliated with the Association. He starts today as the youngest in the team. I’m envious, but I can’t say it. If I do, it feels like all the feelings of running away to school without any ability will spill out.10add2a2a9d25f41

    I don’t even know why I manifested as a guide. Why did I manifest as a guide and desire someone I shouldn’t love….4249cfa759751f26

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    The notebook turned d1be800b18 out to be 7be01bfc48 a diary.f5aff594f0ae7b68

    Desire.64ea58e10d7762bb

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    Cheonghyeon stared intently at the words written in his son’s handwriting. The word suddenly felt very unfamiliar and strange.aadb5e27694ad7e8

    It’s funny to say this when I’m already sleeping with my son, but it hit him that Hakyung wasn’t just his pure son but a ‘man with desires.’feb6109fa5c7d73b

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    ‘Someone I shouldn’t love’ must refer to Im Cheonghyeon, himself.2e9ce88a1c3f5999

    He set aside the 0bd1b24b7d thin notebook and carefully 736f2a9a16 opened the thick one. It was 5049ec00fa also a 2e7f381b1d diary. However, it ee1b4f676b was filled 3ef164bdc8 with phrases 9fd1a9e2dc he wanted cfadd3df34 to remember, eb2fb11491 articles featuring 4666fab9c9 Cheonghyeon, photos, 326084bd91 information about ea5e8da933 guides and ec228cd648 espers, and 3d5d3fcf87 even receipts, 51d253e5f8 making the d404a6b21e notebook thick.f2e01baa2e3d5875

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    Unconsciously, Cheonghyeon sat there and delved into his son’s diary. From the second year of middle school to the beginning of this year, he had separated the diaries by year, totaling six volumes.dffef292f589ef04

    203X. 06. 0950b16055312fd1ba

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    I miss Dad. Today is his birthday…. I only talked to him briefly on the phone, but I missed him so much that I cried a little. I think I came to the wrong school. The kids don’t like me.05e1399148cf252c

    203X. 07. 043eb72990d0e1afe8

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    Han Hee-gyeom touched my butt as a birthday present. I’ve heard that harassment between espers and guides is common, but experiencing it for the first time left me speechless and frozen. Can I report it?3b08b6769dea0c1b

    In the evening, I received a call from Dad, and I ended up whining without realizing it. It’s the worst….a62d50a228026d6a

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    His son seemed to write in his diary almost every day. In front of him, his words had gradually decreased, making him think it was ‘damn puberty,’ but in the diary, he was still a chatty son.ec89e5f71f28fd6d

    Thanks to that, Cheonghyeon 29767057e1 learned exactly what his df87ad126d social relationships were like 9124689b58 and what mindset he e3a920aa3f endured at school.6c69a9ca58a0aa4e

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    After meticulously 73ed371452 reading each 14c4351f3e entry in 38f5fca746 the diary, 6f7e1e4968 he had f8adc1e222 one impression.acec8c46ff5dc953

    His son’s past five years were spent struggling not to love his father.ad20de905284b331

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    ‘Even if classmates teased him, even if he was sexually harassed, no matter how humiliating the situation, it was better than admitting he was sexually aware of his father.’ His son’s judgment was simple and clear.79ede1c4c58818b0

    It was an extreme endurance. Cheonghyeon didn’t assume children were inherently kind. With their egos growing and possessing special abilities, he could easily imagine how arrogant, conceited, and focused on hierarchy they would be.ea66041105222e41

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    In the children’s social hierarchy, Hakyung was at the very bottom.5c084cdb99e949b0

    ‘Han Hee-gyeom….’e6f91c43439de35c

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    Cheonghyeon mulled over the name that appeared in Secretary Song’s report. He suppressed the urge to crush him into powder and had just woken his son at 10 a.m. to sit him at the dining table.fa8f19700097e429

    And Hakyung, unaware of c6543048a1 anything, scratched his cheek db8e8cbd3d while looking at his e943c7c708 father.079bf17b8927bd4c

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    “Hakyung.”91e953b8f8560614

    “Ah!”3ad3a045993b49a5

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    He lifted the child 8bb1fb6a41 and placed him on 1f4ffa2768 his lap. He was already pale 405961ce62 and pitifully thin.4d42bbaad4f53755

    His insides were boiling.8524c1161dfdbea4

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    “F-Father.”a7735ea021934eae

    “Child, it was hard, wasn’t it? I’m upset too, but you must have been so anxious.”74d0832c340c13a7

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    Hakyung, who had been ceff5b93a7 timidly struggling to escape e1b5912e75 his embrace, took a c518f58bbc small breath. He stopped resisting f8ed662567 and let his 94fcc275bb slender neck drop 66cf78ed4d into the broad a156ccaecb embrace. He was bewildered 186c9d07d6 and embarrassed by 55c077e611 the sudden turn a92d032724 in the conversation.f11f6f95850addac

    Cheonghyeon gently patted Hakyung’s back, careful not to break him. While comforting the child, he reaffirmed that human nature doesn’t change.d07857e3e5c0b5d1

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    Humans are inherently vile, shady, and cunning. When they see something they don’t have, they envy, and they don’t hesitate to harm out of jealousy.02b71b4e8bf24267

    Cheonghyeon’s misanthropy was deeply rooted in his bones.d37c7631a1e0fd66

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    That’s why, even in the past, he felt no particular emotion when humans other than Juhyeong and Seonyeon died. The ‘good’ humans tried tirelessly to instill sympathy and compassion for others in Cheonghyeon, but their deaths perfectly sealed even the slight gaps that remained, completing the fortress of ‘misanthropy.’8141dff8fb7b5f90

    Hakyung, created by those 2979261612 good humans, was the 302a417cdf only exception there.71318a2121bf1215

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    That’s why he didn’t include him in his revenge. And he had no plans to involve him in the future. The child knew nothing, and there was no need to dirty his hands now.4ab62da741efa287

    He had almost b40720bddf completed his revenge 6892cee59c over the past 7308cd770d 17 years….8d4d5fd194f22526

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    The only concern was Hakyung’s heart.4bf603f3a274dca6

    As espers and guides destined for each other, Hakyung would try to be with him somehow. That’s fine. But if he finds out that he killed so many humans for revenge, can he maintain the same attitude as now?5ca0ed6545b4670a

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    Guiding aside, part of the reason he embraced him was to deliberately focus his attention on his ‘body.’8a1aedf3c846c3ef

    “Shall I 51e15b5a3e tell you c2890ae471 a fun f4d216967b story?”17ff33c45861d1a0

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    “……?”434128681a278c8f

    If Hakyung asks about the truth, how much should he tell him? The child who once asked, ‘Dad, how are babies made?’ suddenly came to mind, and Cheonghyeon chuckled.988acff4267f863c

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    “Actually, I didn’t have a name.”eda267b334c95013

    “W-what?”eb3c9ef3c1bbb913

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    Hakyung’s eyes widened like saucers. His eyes were red, but the tears were gone.348033e500152309

    Don’t cry, child.d39b2501d428865b

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    It breaks your father’s heart, who learned compassion from you.1692abcf941dbb82

    Makes me want 4d460ae22b to destroy everything.9c2c65679e0605d4

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    “When I 4de1de1927 became aware 6db507ee6c of the cdea94d03f world, I 965be3b740 was on 6d90e7dc00 the streets. The ones 463cb0df04 who picked 5f6aac4b89 me up, 0567b7cf13 gave me 41f00d20b1 a name, 8d6ad25dcc and made 13f370e08f me a 8d49b24529 person were 40a6b9a1bd your biological 65c4004cab parents.”17014d122192a2e4

    “I-I never heard 46e4f57901 that….”39484f8fb61754b6

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    Father was ff63e573ac an orphan? The expression on his 5d425a8042 pale face was transparent.4121703b08bd2796

    Cheonghyeon didn’t deny it.30e40a54e35e6950

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    “That’s why my name is Im Cheonghyeon. Cheong for request, Hyeon for protect. They gave me a good name, hoping I’d become a great esper who protects the people and the country….”3f8be22e29170f13

    “…….”90f7ad362e4bb343

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    “But I ended up 3cc5d54caa protecting our child?”c860d7fca81c7eb2

    Hakyung couldn’t say anything. He hesitated over what to say and how to say it, and his father’s expression as he recited the meaning of his name was so poignant….8a5465a0fea6d140

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    His heart ached.26591be721c4790b

    To Hakyung’s ears, your words sounded like this. That protecting you was more important than protecting the country.7b8f47c8c8f4b436

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    “You know I 867f46a52d gave you your 91b37ad017 name, right?”5651e0909925a9c7

    Hakyung nodded faintly. He remembered because his 502a4765da father often mentioned it.8286b2d8bb6f04c7

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    “What does your name e3efbeffe5 mean?”e136cb1020267e14

    “Ha for below, Gyeong 3995e034a8 for sunlight….”82437b6903af3418

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    “You know it 51654e0a75 well.”e5dd66c06a2a118f

    Cheonghyeon gently detached his d7af471d3d son and met his 09edd2ed18 eyes.1b219528ede07c60

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    On such and such a day, I miss my father. On another such and such a day, it’s hard. Again, on such and such a day, I don’t want to live….9f4f39fd5866f849

    Child, why don’t you want to live?5f38b3c268709112

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    “Listen carefully, Im Hakyung. Your name doesn’t simply mean ‘below’ and ‘sunlight.’ It means sunlight that shines even on a life like a sewer… that’s why it’s ‘Hakyung.’”615149fa159c2d89

    “Ugh….”2fdca36096c4a55c

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    “Hakyung, you’re my only light.”eef8e076ae97efe7

    The tears that had 6f072a82ba been welling up finally 141af4a79c burst forth. Hot, thick streams c9d64880ea fell from his 6d79f1a867 eyes. Hakyung sensed the fiercely dba83150c5 burning life at this cda72a6b0c moment through the heat.916ee68dbd10bf9f

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    I am alive. I’m stubbornly enduring, living steadfastly, and shedding tears in front of the one I love.f5dd8a94381ad603

    He never expected his 32305d4cca father to know his 19397fc44d situation in detail. He had no intention e86ae9daf5 of confiding, nor did acb76300bb he foresee such a 9e887309dc future. If he were 76a5e35ff9 to find out f25b3dc8e1 everything, he assumed 83b9d92ef4 it would be 6b945af2ac the worst-case scenario. It would be a 972ef2e049 difficult and trying time…. Just imagining it 1798cac825 made him breathless.ddabff6f32348aee

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    “Oh dear, you f2fabc14ad were sad. My precious child.”e31135bba8cb303c

    Cheonghyeon laughed f1c68c5bb3 lowly, his 891374b416 throat vibrating. Hakyung felt 51eb6a9167 like he cb51abcdd5 was going 2196a67236 crazy with f3a4fe6540 joy, loving c1ef7cc317 even that.e3ec909b69c66aaa

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    The confession burst a63b8383f3 out unconsciously.dba2386d3769cc15

    “I-I love you….”4b889cd72d2cd2be

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    I love you so much it drives me crazy. You’re crazy for cherishing me so much. Why do you love someone like me? Someone like me, with no ability, no confidence, nothing worth looking at.9af159640ceecbc4

    He must have 807094b4dc been a person 38c15b915c who shone even aa1f89cbeb in the gutter. His parents were 23d062c5c7 just the ones d947e6fd2a who discovered the 2378be4c9d hidden starlight on a1e08d00f0 the street a 7f8ba590b8 step earlier. Even without 7d0c48ee8b them, Cheonghyeon 290fe21823 would have 5d5c20a99f shone alone.f684778c28663e9e

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    But I wasn’t. I was the trash that would be buried, camouflaged, if thrown into the gutter. Cheonghyeon found the dirty mud, gave it a name, and cherished it dearly.8d0e9bed88d4aae6

    Because Cheonghyeon gave him the name ‘Hakyung,’ Hakyung could exist as Hakyung.792295a74f2d3b74

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    Suddenly, Hakyung realized c321d0e14f why he manifested b5dc1497a0 as his guide. No, rather, he was f547056268 late in awakening.1c231018185fe12e

    ‘Im Hakyung.’171d73482d4e1872

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    He had been 31524b9cbf a Guide leading acb45db563 his life even dc23e2d43b before awakening.723b76c457ebd17f

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