WBWB | Chapter 48

“I should be the one asking that question. What are you doing here so late at night?”

“I couldn’t sleep… so I came for a walk,” I offered a flimsy excuse. But it wasn’t entirely a lie.

“And what about you?”

Why was he here, the host of the ball? 

The Duke replied with an impassive expression, “I came for a walk.”

“…”

“Do I need permission to walk on my own land?”

“But what about the ball?”

“What would I be doing there?”

‘What would he be doing at a ball? Dancing, of course.’

But I couldn’t argue with him. I quickly bent down and picked up the lamp I had placed on the ground.

“Then I’ll be going now.”

Speak of the devil. I didn’t want to disturb his walk, and honestly, just seeing him made my heart ache. I had longed to see him, to talk to him, but now that I was actually facing him, I felt a sharp pang of pain in my chest.

‘It’s like I’m being punished for wanting something beyond my reach.’

It was the pain of yearning for someone who could never be mine. I turned to go down the hill with my lamp when something caught my wrist.

I looked back. He was holding my wrist.

“Stay a while longer. Unless you’re running away from me.”

His face was clouded with anger.

“Why are you avoiding me? Are you angry with me? Why? Shouldn’t I be the angry one?”

“…”

“Or are you afraid of me? Then rest assured. I won’t make the same offer to you again. If I had intended to force myself on you, I would have already done so, wouldn’t I? My offer was merely a suggestion, out of pity for your situation.”

I took a deep breath.

“…”

The cold night air stung my lungs.

“So if you’re not angry or afraid of me, let’s at least exchange a few words as we used to. I didn’t dislike conversing with you.”

As soon as he said that, I doubled over, coughing violently for a long while.

He stopped talking and rubbed my back. Even through the thick coat, the touch of his hand felt like a burn.

“Are you alright?”

“I wasn’t trying to avoid you, Your Grace. I was just about to return because I’m not feeling well. It’s colder than I thought. Please forgive my rudeness.”

Why had I even tried to run away from the mansion? When I couldn’t truly escape anyway. Regret filled my chest. Lying in bed, sleepless and imagining him dancing with the Princess, would have been better than hearing his words just now.

That he had offered me the position of mistress out of pity for my situation. That I had been losing sleep, tormented by his pity. It was fortunate that my coughing fit had erupted just then.

“I’d like to return now, Your Grace.”

I didn’t want to hear anything more. I just wanted to lie down and sleep.

“Then let’s go back together.”

It would be strange to refuse any further, so I walked down the hill with him. As we headed back to the mansion, he spoke, 

“This is the first ball held in this mansion since my mother passed away.”

“…”

“Ana dances quite well, as you said. It was worth having her learn. All the young noblemen were asking her to dance.”

“…”

“Did you, perhaps, also want to attend the ball?”

His words barely registered. I answered perfunctorily, without thinking, just saying whatever came to mind.

“Not at all. What would I be doing there?”

What I wanted to know was how beautiful the Princess had looked at the ball, and how many times he had danced with her. She had been staying at the mansion for a month now.

“What would you be doing? Dancing, of course.”

“Who would dance with a criminal like me?”

If the Princess had captured his heart, I sincerely hoped she would truly love him in return. So that he wouldn’t become a plaything for her cruel amusement.

Could the Princess fall in love? It was possible. I had fallen in love, too. Who wouldn’t fall in love with him?

‘…My goodness, he offered me the position of his mistress out of pity?’

His words made my heart ache, and at the same time, I was overwhelmed with worry for him. What kind of man offered a woman the position of mistress out of pity for her situation? It was kindness to a fault. 

I coughed again when he was about to speak, this time so hard I felt my heart would burst.

“Are you feeling very unwell?”

“I apologize.”

“I’ll send the physician in the morning.”

“I’m truly fine. I’ll be better after some sleep.”

“That’s for the physician to decide.”

An uncomfortable silence settled between us. I felt compelled to say something.

“Her Highness… is truly beautiful, isn’t she? Beautiful enough to make anyone fall in love at first sight. Even when I was at court, her beauty was renowned.”

“Is that so? I suppose she is.”

“She’s such a graceful dancer that many people dreamt of dancing with her.”

“I see.”

“Her Highness…”

I tried to think of something else to say, but I couldn’t. My heart increasingly ached with sadness and confusion.

I quickened my pace. As we reached the brightly lit mansion, a sigh of relief almost escaped my lips.

“Then, I’ll be going in now.”

“Get some rest.”

I returned to my room through the servants’ stairs and lay down on my bed. Knowing that he had offered me the position of mistress out of pity made everything click into place, albeit with a sense of hollowness.

‘I see…’

When I woke up the next day, I felt truly unwell. As promised, or perhaps because the Duke had instructed him to, the physician visited me in the morning. He examined me and advised me to drink plenty of willow bark tea and rest. Lessons had been suspended since the Princess’s arrival, so I drank the tea and stayed in bed.

I felt like the bed was sinking, pulling me down into a bottomless abyss, when a knock came. I sat up and opened the door to an unexpected visitor.

“Who are you?”

“I am Baroness Etoille, lady-in-waiting to Her Highness.”

The middle-aged woman spoke in a dignified tone.

‘The Princess’s lady-in-waiting?’

“Are you the daughter of the Toulouse family, exiled here?”

“Yes, I am.”

“I’ll give you time to prepare. Dress in your finest clothes and follow me. Her Highness wishes to speak with you urgently.”

I quickly bowed my head and opened the wardrobe to find a suitable dress. 

Baroness Etoille’s gaze followed me as I changed into my dress, clad only in my undergarments. Her gaze was cold as ice, making me feel as if I were being scrutinized from head to toe. Once I was dressed and had styled my hair, she left the room without a word, and I followed her.

What could the Princess possibly want from me?

The Princess was staying in the largest and most beautiful room in the mansion. At Baroness Etoille’s signal, the maid standing by the door opened it and announced, 

“The Baroness has arrived.” 

I could see the Princess over Baroness Etoille’s shoulder.

The Princess, dressed in a snow-white gown that bared her shoulders, was sitting on a chaise lounge, having her long, cascading hair brushed. Her hair, long and thick, flowed down the back of the chair, and a noblewoman, presumably her maid, was brushing it. Three other women were also present, either standing or sitting.

The Princess looked at me and gestured.

“Come closer. Sit here.”

Her melodious voice echoed through the room. She gestured to a stool next to the chaise lounge, where she was sitting. I sat down, as if in a trance.

She leaned back against the cushions and looked at me. It was the first time I had seen the Princess so close. A pleasant fragrance emanated from her, a sweet, comforting scent, like something from heaven.

She was breathtakingly beautiful. Her eyes shone brighter than the star-shaped jewels adorning her hair, and although I knew it was rude, I couldn’t tear my gaze away once it was captured.