WBWB | Chapter 28

‘If only a kind woman who recognizes his real worth appears…’13c00ce280ad05a9

“If this territory had a proper mistress, she could manage the affairs of this mansion and act as Your Grace’s representative, handling matters in your stead during your annual absences. Not only that, but she could also serve as a mother figure to Lady Ana. So, I…”77ca1e3a4b1bd964

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But even as I e64d244e86 spoke, I felt a 10256f67a2 sense of unease.97b3049fc0cde7de

“I hope Your Grace hasn’t given up on the possibility of finding an intelligent and kind woman as your wife.”1d8c7175bff95fa4

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“What?”196193085ef9923d

“Because Your Grace is certainly worthy of being loved by such a woman.”7f119f8181d3b625

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And as b3bacccd25 soon as 1bea8f422f I finished 057323db28 speaking, I b06f3957ad realized I 0ea8189a59 had just 1b08bc9732 poked a 5340724f02 sleeping lion.dc265078c9d01475

“What…”d1e79992cc52558d

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He looked as if he couldn’t believe what he had just heard.4a8a86f76c3a8c55

“What do you mean by that?”abfa4f36e097e0bd

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Seeing his emerald eyes 3074de81c0 narrowing, I suddenly sobered ca46d5007c up.f110f6b46854d490

‘Gasp!’c06374db0e8ef84f

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I realized I had 3566128806 crossed a line. I had spoken out 4e30718a49 of turn, saying things b0c989613e that would be considered 375f5ebc78 rude even between close 86c9c07f89 acquaintances, and I had 94e619b21f no right to say 628942a751 such things. aaa87da2c2f1c72e

What did 3939761639 I know 34126c7135 about family? I, who 16425aaa99 had never 1afd81a435 even had b7b1baf94f a family d8d949ebfa of my 10279182f4 own.a53606109820b6b5

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“I apologize! I misspoke! Please forgive me!”bc5586448ce734c9

Horrified by ec2a6e11dc my own 05cbce95bb impudence, I fcfc036d35 hastily begged 48377b7bff for forgiveness. I was so 454b88768f flustered that my 9b3da989b0 hands trembled. But it was too 04aae52a50 late to take back 4d66a371fd my words.fc7106b43316082f

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“What do you know?”46d43cae8662461b

He made 53692f5aa5 no attempt 007083de30 to hide 1d28d03493 his displeasure. Like alcohol touched by 645e74a540 a flame, the remaining 74d66bc5f2 effects of the drink 6e09263892 vanished from my body. The rest of the dcfc4f6428 meal had become more 23dbacdf71 dangerous than the broken 78ac7f3a5f ice Lady Ana had f8f46c6afc fallen through.f6d8ddc6392dbf83

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For dessert, the dish I had been longing for appeared; crème brûlée. But I couldn’t taste the sweetness of the crackling sugar crust or the smooth custard beneath.d6cb79d05eb51b63

“…”0b44a3bd9d93edab

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The Duke didn’t touch his dessert. He stood up and left without a word. Back in my room, I collapsed onto the bed, still in my dress.9e7df8447d5ba624

‘What on earth have I done?’cdfb26432ed64a88

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As if I 9cc6d8f895 were someone qualified f73b3fcb8f he could confide 945554e92e in. 59c9e18861c207f3

He had simply 906c5854d2 been voicing his a677884775 thoughts, thinking aloud, fcd20a7379 and I had 749c1aaaea acted as if fe904cffe1 I knew everything.e49b3cee10d4cd10

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‘Am I insane?’b4acf5d8b1eb2a87

Lying in bed, I 5647ffec86 regretted everything I had ff7554625f said, from beginning to 95ab4afed6 end.2e3fbf56b4e225d5

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‘I can’t believe it. Why did I say those things?’74b2de32d05fcbfc

I couldn’t sleep that night. 9dc157355dab4ac2

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Not only c5c5f0af67 was the 00ccf25570 image of a7d45bc236 his narrowed 20052fc61a green eyes 6239adaebf seared into 9b94ea7c6e my mind, 8020cf4354 but I 7a41cc2be6 also felt fd2f6aa9ad like I 595fed13f8 had lost 42e671b74d my chance 938e095e3f to write 05c0415e9a to my b1a6ed861d family.05880e6a328ca96d

‘How dare I provoke the man who holds my life in his hands?’a6b098514f8ea287

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* * *db16b60105541c99

Meanwhile, Duke Baldr de 594fabd21c Skadi was also having 1abb8a5514 a sleepless night.4755c48f62a37f02

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He stared at 0380570085 the ceiling, wide 1f49a0258d awake. Whether his eyes were edadf7cb58 open or closed, he 0a422aae6f saw the woman with b755ace9a1 brown eyes in the 104c79818d cream-colored dress.ec908625021658c4

‘Why did she say those things to me?’6d291c40d0a481b9

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The woman imprinted 440543ba56 on his retinas 8a99416827 wore a dress 0a52c6623f that seemed to 07a07ce724 belong to her, ef6b207a78 a perfect fit, 8492334ba6 and looked at 3babeeed65 him with eyes e76d66cf98 that held neither 92dda51820 a smile nor 5fa017e363 fear.410fcf2dc572c44d

‘Why, all 1a96e085d3 of a da83b827fa sudden?’8c3cc5162b4748ec

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To be honest, 9c9410a819 Baldr had been a8bbc8d734 bewildered from the 3dc9476002 moment she entered 55201e56d5 the dining hall. Jeanne was 5b14564f6c different, almost ecfddd6c5c as if 2749055937 she had f76097ab31 cast some ffd8b787e6 sort of 63985b153f spell. 059004bdf9b32e9b

Who would 004899fec6 recognize her c2b1070b11 as the 788ac03c59 same woman 3bc738311d who had cd1c81bde3 arrived at f26b97a2ea the mansion 0122168bda near death?22d1409dd704ddec

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Her cheeks f0949d151e and lips 940b1c51bb were unusually dc813e6348 flushed, and 6d480bfdc4 her eyes 0f506e001a sparkled. Her eyes ddcc9d9344 shone like 1f1e45b5f5 stars, forcing b64c61c4a8 Baldr to 03a3c20e61 avert his 477966a73c gaze first, 44ffa66408 as ifhewere the one 3cd6be9616 who had wrongedher. 1f7630b49cadbaf8

It had been the same in his library yesterday. He found it difficult to meet her gaze directly. Yet, he couldn’t tear his eyes away. Baldr couldn’t understand his own feelings. Objectively speaking, there were many women more beautiful than Jeanne de Toulouse.d20283e2bbc24d88

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He felt his mouth 845b6f0cda go dry and offered d3d973ddb5 her a drink. And he drank 40fa699ebd as well. dded39bc944c1f79

It was winter, and the alcohol served with meals was stronger than in other seasons to ward off the cold. Drinking strong alcohol in winter was as natural as breathing in Skadi, so it hadn’t occurred to him that she wouldn’t be accustomed to it. He hadn’t anticipated that the alcohol would not only make her eyes sparkle even brighter but also lead to what, from her perspective, was a grave misstep.d58cc9110146d827

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‘Marriage could be a9b17c8238 a solution for a7f2a36625 Your Grace, not bf01df3b5c a problem.’1bd7421aa5f5ab41

So, what happened? Baldr was captivated by Jeanne’s words.b8e29663d187b44e

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‘Your Grace seems to think that all princesses are like your mother, but just as not all men are the same, not all women are the same either.’ae876de7c1f42aba

Baldr replayed her words in his mind, over and over, trying to decipher their meaning, until he was sick of them. But they wouldn’t go down, remaining in his stomach like a lump, tormenting him.364d943479fd4a9c

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‘There might be someone out there who would appreciate Your Grace and this land for what they are. Wouldn’t it be a shame to give up on marriage too early based on assumptions?’2d57bc5b06282908

If anyone else 72acac49d8 had made such 3784b5453b a presumptuous remark, 60ee1f3c7e Baldr would have d4288ae910 simply shrugged it f5fc67783e off in amusement.b88e73d2e5a20b62

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‘I hope Your Grace hasn’t given up on the possibility of finding an intelligent and kind woman as your wife.’ae5354c9aa9480f5

But because bcae4bf67d it was bed6f1c663 Jeanne who 3b3079a197 had spoken f1904827e0 those words, 0541364e57 they held 5aadfe208e a strange b8b2d5f260 power. Like magic. c07beedfc4e7d34a

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Baldr was so flustered that he lost his composure and fled the dining hall without finishing his meal. Naturally, he hadn’t been able to ask Jeanne how she liked the crème brûlée, a rare treat.1a83b3d250476193

‘What do you know?’fa3959f63a560aa3

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Baldr, who had b552f6d436 never known fear, 79c6117885 had run away b500ff651e like a hunted 97f47f753b animal.d1f6e7868893ca2a

‘What was she thinking when she said those things?’09441b3b04d3dd00

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The woman who 91a514c4d0 had spoken those 6679cb461b words was probably 82d4299333 sleeping soundly right 4f6e90d131 now, while he e6876b8ca2 alone, was tossing 3547750fb8 and turning, unable a09e029760 to sleep.c0317cdf1fd9acc9

‘Not all women are like my mother? What does she even know about my mother?’330e666c8fee4967

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He was ff016e1b35 reading far 0aa3366e9a too much 74ef1881b2 into her 7e395045ca words, which a6696be83d had clearly 8e329f839e crossed a 0a62f73607 line.41461592140fb783

‘And besides, wouldn’t she herself, the one who said those things, leave this place without hesitation the moment she was free?’9eb79926285683c6

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Like many exiles before her, and like his mother, a princess of Lances, she probably couldn’t wait to leave. bd82fee0bb2823f5

His mother had hated his father all her life. It had been a foregone conclusion that a princess would come to this land and marry the Duke, but she hadn’t imagined it would be her. His father had chosen his mother out of five sisters, and his mother had suffered for that choice throughout her short life.22ecc1064087b37a

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If you hadn’t chosen me among us five sisters, if you had chosen another, if I hadn’t caught your eye…e421a83ddb3d5040

His mother’s resentment grew stronger with time. Perhaps it was exacerbated by the fact that one of her sisters had remained unmarried, becoming a central figure in court life, with numerous lovers and scandals.02a3db8760e72f68

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He and his brother had grown up watching their mother’s constant resentment towards their father. 8005895ce0a87bdd

To him, bfa89db941 it seemed c67612e2bf as if 1ad3460ae7 his mother 3b2838373a never tired beb3eefcc0 of her 5367dca998 anger. b349a60c50ae9f85

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What if she had 6b2f5bc3b0 shown some affection towards b63307b2cd her sons? 8b24869b443be09c

But his mother, a721fdf9ed like other noblewomen, 7fb388bb5c had delegated the 439b278cde tasks of breastfeeding ae02b1076e to a wet 838195b6b4 nurse, playing to 8607611493 a nanny, and f2057771a6 teaching to tutors. He had no a8da0b363a complaints as they b1ac4fd120 were all professionals. But perhaps because they 655994c876 were all chosen by e85d612973 his mother, they never 09efc0fd0e crossed the line.51526ea1fd7a94df

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Baldr had grown 9eaa649a50 up deprived of e71ea91b60 love. 8598943178df08c1

How could a45396744d he not b398939087 have felt b6cdef8ee8 it? A thirsty person could 9452d6cca0 smell water from afar.6e23bf67683a9656

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As a 91444c2a14 child, Baldr a80d81ef46 had wished ed6b020493 his parents af594845b6 would divorce. Their marriage 6a0c5ae7cb was like 4fbe1cd6d2 a union 95735f9f21 of fire d6a9a3b0e4 and ice, bbd490cc74 a mutually 3b121fd616 destructive relationship. The more 1a39ada054 his mother da3ddac068 raged, the b02526ebc4 more his b28360abf3 father retreated 9fbd0ee9d0 further into dd6caeba7a his work, cd267d9ff2 his wars, 0dacc0515a and his de5341ace7 books, instead 35261c0495 of engaging 7ddd7a5a6e with her. And then his 07a64e6715 mother would sneer 83f69356d4 at him and 7bbffdfa90 his brother.c6b9da2a661b0bc9

‘I thought I married a Duke, but it turns out he’s a scholar.’646f3fec148cea9d

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His mother died when d8772f380c he was twelve. The cause of death 72b882b078 was given as consumption d03e063977 and a cold, attributed 711ded82e0 to wearing too thin f65e85b87b clothes in the middle e59331997a of winter. However, the servants whispered c9ade1fbd6 that the Duchess had 03bf4ae34c taken her own life.ec18ab9f9935b2de

He hadn’t been surprised, nor had he been sad. Although she was his mother, the woman who had given birth to him, she had been a distant and unfamiliar figure, both emotionally and physically.6eee0a48c48431c5

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