WBWB | Chapter 23

What had happened to Lady Ana? 

As I lay there groaning, someone helped me sit up and poured something into my mouth. It was sour and warm.

I opened my eyes and looked at the person. It was the young maid who took care of my room.

“Ana?”

A hoarse voice escaped my throat.

“The young lady is fine. Please rest well.”

Relieved by her words, I felt the warmth of the drink spread through my body and drifted back to sleep.

As I slipped in and out of consciousness, I kept dreaming. I was being chased, falling from great heights. I woke up screaming, gasping for breath, only to fall asleep again.

‘I’m cold, I’m scared… Am I going to die?’

The chills wouldn’t leave me, and my body burned with fever. Lying by the fireplace, I shivered, drenched in cold sweat. Each time, the maid would help me sit up, make me drink a warm beverage, wipe away the sweat, and change my damp clothes.

How many times did this happen? 

When I finally woke up, it was dark. I was thirsty and hungry. I opened my eyes, my body trembling, and noticed the fire in the fireplace seemed to have gone out. I called out to the maid.

“Janet, Janet, are you there?”

If she wasn’t, I was going to just go back to sleep. I didn’t have the strength to get up and rekindle the fire with the poker ,or even look for water. When I received no answer, I closed my eyes in resignation.

Just then, someone opened the door and entered. I sensed their presence with my eyes closed and assumed it was the maid. No one else had ever entered my room before.

I sighed, still lying down.

“Could you… light the fire? And bring me some water.”

I heard the sound of the fire being lit. And then I felt a hand on my damp forehead, as if checking my temperature. The hand was dry, firm, and large. Large enough to not only cover but also envelop my forehead.

‘Was Janet’s hand this big?’

My senses must have been distorted by the fever. In any case, the coolness of the palm was pleasant.

“Ah…”

I moaned and stirred. I wished the hand would linger, but it was quickly withdrawn, leaving me feeling a pang of disappointment.

As I lay there taking a deep breath, the person slipped a hand behind my back, between me and the sheets, and helped me sit up. The hand on my back was also large. I felt a slight discomfort in my back, which must have also been injured. I drank the water that was brought to my lips. It was sweet and cool.

“Could I have another glass?”

Then, opening my eyes, I gasped.

“…”

Standing before me, pouring water into the glass, was the Duke of Skadi. Frozen, I stared at him, and the Duke, with an impassive expression, offered me the glass.

“Here, drink.”

Could this be a dream?

I took the glass and drank, still wondering.

“Your fever has subsided. That’s good. You’ve been bedridden for three days.”

“…”

“The physician said you might have died if you had stayed outside any longer. Do you remember what happened?”

But the sensation of the water going down my throat told me this was real.

“Your Grace.”

I tried to sit up, but he stopped me with a shake of his head.

“…”

A moment of silence in the air.

I had expected the Duke to be furious with me for putting Lady Ana in danger. Perhaps he might even kill me on the spot. But his green eyes, looking at me, were calm and composed. 

Was he so angry that he had become cold? 

I couldn’t read his thoughts.

“I… I’m resigning as tutor, effective today.”

I sat up and clasped my hands together.

“Resigning? Why?”

“Because I put my student in danger. It’s all my fault. You can send me to cultivate the wasteland now. I’ll accept any punishment you deem fit.”

It was all my fault. There was nothing else to say.

The Duke of Skadi tilted his head, studying my face, as if trying to discern my intentions. In the past, his every gesture would have intimidated me. But not now.

“You’re not afraid at all. Are you really fine with cultivating the wasteland? Do you even know what that entails?”

“I don’t. But I still think it’s appropriate. It’s all my fault. I… I should have stopped the young lady from going there.”

It would still be a light punishment.

I had endangered a child under my care. And not just any child, but the Duke’s only daughter. I would have been begging for forgiveness if it were a lesser offense. But this was far more serious. I just wanted to know how Lady Ana was doing before I was dragged away somewhere.

“Is Ana alright?”

“Ana?”

He muttered as if to himself. I belatedly realized that I had addressed the Duke’s daughter as if she were my own sister.

“Ana recovered much faster than you.”

That was good, I was relieved. I placed my hand over my heart.

The figure of Lady Ana reaching out to me from the icy water flashed through my mind. And her faint voice, singing in my arms. If I had lost Lady Ana, there would have been no greater punishment.

“Do you truly believe you deserve to be punished?”

He asked, his voice like an interrogation.

“Do you even know what kind of punishment I might inflict? Haven’t you heard the rumors about me? I’m someone who can make even stones weep.”

Honestly, despite my resolve to accept any punishment, I couldn’t help but be afraid. I didn’t understand the Duke’s intentions in pushing me like this.

“…”

Unable to speak, I closed my eyes. This must be what it felt like to be thrown into a lion’s den. My breath hitched in my throat, and I couldn’t control my trembling.

“Yes.”

I barely managed to answer.

“Is that so? But I don’t think you deserve to be punished. If you hadn’t gone with Ana, I would have had to retrieve her body from the lake.”

I opened my eyes. He was still looking at me with an unreadable expression.

“Even if you had told her not to go, Ana would have gone to the lake that day. Alone. And it’s not your responsibility to entertain her. The nanny, negligent in her duties, has been dismissed. While you were hovering between life and death.”

I stiffened at his unexpected words.

“I’m here not to punish you, but to thank you.”

Thank me?

“From what Ana told me, you handled the situation admirably. You wouldn’t have experienced such accidents in Franc, where the ice breaks and people fall in, but you acted with remarkable composure, especially for a foreigner who had never faced such a situation. If it hadn’t been for you beside Ana, I wouldn’t have been able to face my brother in the afterlife. And…”

He paused before continuing.

“Thank you for waking up. I was worried you might die.”

And then he quickly added, “Now Ana can rest easy too. You’ve done me a great service, so I’ll do something for you in return. Tell me what you desire, and I’ll grant it. Come see me when you’ve fully recovered. And…”

He paused again.

“Let’s have dinner when you’re feeling better.”

In that instant, the tension that had been constricting me released.

Lady Ana was alright, and I didn’t have to resign. 

The guilt that had been choking me also dissipated. All the pressure that had been weighing on me lifted at once, and I burst into tears, overwhelmed by emotion. 

I lowered my head to hide my tears. I didn’t want him to see me crying.

Wouldn’t it be polite for him to excuse himself and leave at this point? But instead, the Duke offered me a handkerchief with his calloused hand.

“Wipe your tears.”

His words sounded like an order. I took the handkerchief and pressed it against my eyes.

“I don’t think I said anything that would make you cry.”

“I just… couldn’t help it.”

Indeed, I just couldn’t help it.

‘This is awful.’

With the guilt and pressure gone, shame washed over me again. 

Why did I always show him such embarrassing sides of myself?

‘I must be so filthy and smelly, and my hair is probably greasy…’

Vomiting, being seen unwashed after days of travel, being caught gathering apples in my skirt.

‘How much lower can I sink? I’m so pathetic and ashamed. I wish I could just disappear.’

I returned the handkerchief and apologized.

“I’m sorry for constantly showing you such unseemly behavior.”

“Unseemly?”

He frowned as he took the handkerchief, as if I had said something strange.