UBC Ch5

The verdant tree laden with fruit now glowed warmly in the reflected moonlight. I carefully leaned my bicycle against the wall of Eui-joo’s house and pushed open the gate with my shoulder. My intention to simply drop off the side dishes, receive the letter Eui-joo had supposedly written, and leave after this exchange vanished the moment I saw the long shadow sprawled on the wooden floor. Seeing his languid posture, as if he wouldn’t even bother taking food out of the fridge to eat, I changed my mind.

It wasn’t as if I hadn’t brought the food out of pity for him living alone in an empty house, but at this rate, Mom’s side dishes would inevitably become a breeding ground for flies. Ignoring the man who didn’t even acknowledge my presence, I went up to the wooden floor and spread out the meal. Oblivious to the events unfolding at his feet, the man lay with his legs crossed, staring blankly at the ceiling.

Not wanting to take out the side dishes in their containers, I went to the kitchen. I knew where Eui-joo kept his chopsticks and spoons after washing them. But the kitchen cabinet held only three bowls, spotlessly empty without even a utensil holder. The culprit must be the man. I was furious that he had carelessly thrown away Eui-joo’s belongings, but as an outsider, what could I do about his blood relative’s decision?

“Excuse me.”

The man, who had been enjoying the humid breeze while tapping one foot, turned his head. My cheeks flushed from bustling around alone in the kitchen, I hesitated before pointing to the kitchen.

“Where are the pot, bowls, and chopsticks?”

I had seen a news report yesterday saying that this year would be hotter than last year. Perhaps that was why the man looked so languid as he turned away, as if dismissing my question, and replied.

“I’m hungry.”

“Well, you need chopsticks to eat. Are you going to scoop it up with your fingers?”

I blurted out the words without realizing I was angry, and the man lifted his chin. His gaze, demanding even after being served, made my shoulders shrink more and more. Then, the man, who had rolled over onto his stomach, flashed a sloppy smile.

“There are chopsticks. The ones that came with the jajangmyeon.”

It turned out that he hadn’t been glaring at me but was deep in thought. Because of his cold appearance, he must have been misunderstood often. I couldn’t even bring myself to ask if he had a small plate, so I reluctantly handed him the side dishes in their containers.

As soon as the rice and side dishes were set down, the man sat up and took the seat across from me. A man having a high school girl deliver his meals. Just as I was about to ask for Eui-joo’s letter, the man gripped the chopsticks in his fist.

Once again, he displayed chopstick skills that were nothing short of acrobatics, along with the worst table manners, burying his face and only devouring the side dishes. I felt sorry for the side dishes being snatched away in clumps by the man’s chopsticks. He seemed to particularly enjoy the zucchini stir-fry, as half of it was already gone.

Unable to just watch, I firmly grabbed the man’s wrist as it passed in front of me. The man, who hadn’t imagined being interrupted, froze with his cheeks puffed out.

“Ah, geez.”

“…”

“Eat slowly. And your chopstick skills…”

I was more curious about how he managed to pick up the side dishes with his unheard-of fist-chopstick grip. Thinking I should take a look at his hands while I had the chance, I tore open a new pair of wooden chopsticks and showed them to him.

“Put one finger here. And one finger here. See?”

The man quietly put rice in his mouth, only stealing glances with his eyes. Although there wasn’t a big change, I could feel the man’s subtle concentration. The man’s chewing speed was slower than before, and about a third of his rice remained. Concluding that it was impossible to teach him today, I shook my head.

“How old are you?”

“Twenty.”

“Do you go to college?”

If the man was twenty, he would be just about the age to have entered college. The man, muttering that the braised beef was delicious as he finished it off, then swept away the zucchini stir-fry.

“I told you I dropped out of high school. In the first year.”

That meant his highest level of education was middle school. Just as I was concluding that he was an even bigger thug than I had thought, the man’s listless voice continued.

“My father sold his son to pay off his debts. I work there.”

I had been imagining a thug who rode a motorcycle and roamed the city in a group, and I was startled and my hand trembled. The place he worked probably wasn’t an ordinary office job where he looked at documents. I felt ashamed of my past self for scolding him for not visiting Eui-joo. I deliberately shifted from my kneeling position to a more uncomfortable sitting position and met his gaze. The man, having eaten his fill, put down his chopsticks and poured barley tea into a glass.

“I paid for the meal. No more questions, right?”

“Uh… so you’re saying you answered because I gave you a meal.”

“Yeah. Don’t come again.”

The man, adding a sigh to the sweltering weather, stood up, took the table to the kitchen. I was left blinking, feeling as if I had been slapped after unexpectedly serving him a meal. In the meantime, the man quickly cleaned up the table and came back to sit heavily on the wooden floor. His back, facing the old gate that no one would come through, suited the stubborn summer weather.

As if he was bored just sitting there, he took out a cigarette pack, and I ended up saying something.

“Don’t smoke that right after eating. You smoked earlier too.”

For the first time, the man frowned and turned his head. The way he rebelliously put the cigarette in his mouth didn’t make it seem like he wouldn’t smoke.

“At least smoke it after I leave. I’m just going to get the letter and go.”

“Letter?”

“The one Eui-joo wrote to me, you said you had it.”

Then, the man gave a sly smile and blatantly scanned me up and down.

“There’s no way there’s anything like that. Besides, I’m illiterate, so I can’t read.”

“What?”

“Idiot.”

The man, who spoke carelessly, lay down, but he didn’t put the lighter to the cigarette. The man, who was letting time pass by in the same state as before eating, was the real idiot.

I was surprised that the man, who kept messing with me, was illiterate, and I was angry that he had lied. If I didn’t want to be taken advantage of by the man’s inexplicable spite, I had to leave now.

“Yang Ji-eon.”

The man, who I thought would just let me leave without seeing me off, said quietly.

“Eui-joo and I only share half our blood. We only have the same father.”

“…So?”

“I’m more unrelated to Eui-joo and you than you think. I’m just a half-brother, so don’t bother with me.”

Walking straight ahead and opening the gate, my eyes widened and I turned around. His hair, bowed in the fan’s breeze, fluttered.

“Your mom seems to have raised you well. As you live, there’s a reason why people tell you not to do things, not to get close to certain people.”

So, he was indirectly and awkwardly telling me not to come again. As I snorted and walked away, thinking there was no way I would come again even if he asked, his next words pierced my back.

“The side dishes were good.”

The man’s last words were buried by the sound of the gate slamming shut. It was probably something like, who knew there would be an idiot who actually brought them when asked. In the process of setting up the bicycle leaning against the wall, getting on, and pedaling, my head was filled with anger.

The fact that he was a half-brother, a high school dropout, a man who went to work to pay off his father’s debts, and the various stories weighed heavily on me, but I gave him negative points because of the way he had looked at me as if I were a pushover.

Even if he asked me to come again, I would never go. He had nothing in common with the gentle Eui-joo, and he was just a man who told lies.

I returned home and brushed my teeth until they bled. The man’s messy chopstick skills flickered before my eyes like water stains on the mirror, but I shook my head and tried to erase them. In addition, the word “illiterate” could not be erased until after midnight.

My peaceful life had been shaken once by Eui-joo’s death, and twice more by the appearance of his brother. However, no matter what waves crashed, they were episodes that I could quickly forget because of the barrier I had built with my exam preparation.

“Ji-eon.”

“Huh?”

On the third day of vacation, friends who were taking winter vacation classes called home to ask me to meet them downtown. We set a time, ate an ice cream cake that had appeared in a TV commercial, and looked around a 1000-won store with the remaining allowance. As I entered the household goods section and looked at the display case with two-thousand-won bowls, my hand and gaze stopped together. The training chopsticks, which had no brand name, seemed like they could be used by adults as well.

“What are you doing?”

“Oh, just looking around.”

“I’ve been looking for you. We’re going to pay now.”

Friends who had been looking at gloves on special sale found me in an unexpected corner. My foolish hand was just touching the packaging of the chopsticks as if I were going to buy them.

“Let’s pay quickly and go to the karaoke.”

“Okay.”

In less than two days, the man had become the number one person to avoid in Chowa-ri. A thug who smoked cigarettes on the street, a blood relative of the orphaned Eui-joo, also an orphan. Rumors spread that he had gone to work for a loan shark to collect daily payments, that he was involved with gangsters spanning the city and province, and that the conclusion was that the man should be avoided. Even when the village occasionally slaughtered pigs, slaughtered cows, or made rice cakes, they didn’t go to the man. It was a different kind of ostracism than with Eui-joo. At least Eui-joo, who was a student, received rice cakes and pig hearts. Rumors that he had dropped out of high school due to a group fight spread on the evening of the second day, and the man’s personal information became public property in the neighborhood.

“Don’t come.”

The man, unaware that he had been chosen as a regular topic at the Chowa-ri community center, was somewhat pitiful. Was the dead Eui-joo encouraging me to take care of his unfortunate brother?

“Telling me not to come, so why would I go?”

“What did you say?”

“No, nothing.”

I shook off the hand that had been hastily removed from the chopstick packaging. Let the man be ostracized in the village or not, it was none of my business. Knowing that he was someone who wouldn’t be able to endure it and would leave anyway, I resolutely cut off the strings of pity. Let’s stop being nosy. Linking arms with my friend who was going to the checkout, I forced a smile.

It was a day when the bright summer weather seemed to be strangling my neck.