TWKH Ch 35

“Yes, I expected that kind of response. I thought you’d get mad, thinking you’d be scolded. But in response to Baekyung’s question, Jehyun furrowed his brows, laughed, and countered with,

“Jealousy?”

Laughter, as if to say it was absurd, spread around.

“Is jealousy important? Then we should break up.”

Finally, at the answer that was spat out, Baekyung couldn’t hide his shock. He stared blankly at Jehyun, eyes wide and mouth agape.

Numerous moments flashed through his mind. Among them, the most vivid and large was a human study report on Jehyun’s computer full of explicit expressions he had seen not long ago.

A hypocritical human hiding a ruthless nature beneath an innocent face… A ‘political talent’ overflowing with the qualities of a politician…

The sentences that still lingered in his memory, along with Jehyun’s defensive attitude whenever he tried to get closer, all came back to him. On top of that, the criticism that jealousy in normal situations isn’t normal, and the insult that his mind wasn’t healthy.

The scattered pieces in Baekyung’s heart came together, swelling rapidly. Over them, sharp thorns of distrust seemed to grow like chestnuts, and then burst open, letting out the fully ripened anxiety like a tangible thing.

Does Sunbae like me?

As soon as that question was etched into his mind, Baekyung felt his face grow hot. His rationality seemed about to snap. Biting his lips hard to keep his composure, Jehyun, puzzled by Baekyung’s silence, called out,

“Baekyung?”

That call felt like a signal flare. The gentle voice seemed to coax him to speak, promising to indulge his complaints, even though that was far from the truth. Baekyung couldn’t hold back.

“Does Sunbae like me?”

His abrupt question was laden with hurt. Looking up with reddened eyes, Baekyung asked again,

“Do you like me or not?”

“… What?”

Jehyun blinked, seemingly flustered by the sudden change in topic. Looking at that handsome face, Baekyung felt tears well up for no reason. He bit his lip hard and fixed his gaze on the floor, speaking while his eyes were fixed on the floor visible between the table and chair.

“If I compliment someone else on their looks and laugh while talking to them, you wouldn’t get jealous, and if I held hands with someone else, you’d want to break up immediately. What’s the difference between waiting for me to make a mistake so you can break up?”

“… No, Baekyung.”

Jehyun shook his head, flustered by Baekyung’s fabrication, but Baekyung kept talking as if he couldn’t hear.

“In fact, in fact, aren’t you still thinking of me like in that study report…?”

“The study report?”

“Sunbae, you think I’m a hypocritical bastard hiding a ruthless nature, right…? That’s why you didn’t delete that file…! You don’t even like me enough to feel jealousy, you only think about breaking up, and also…”

You don’t even want to do anything other than kissing… The last words came out in a barely audible whisper. It was because of his hurt pride.

Every time Baekyung tried to get closer during their kisses, Shin Jehyun pulled away. Over months, this happened hundreds of times, nurturing deep-seated anxiety in Baekyung.

The harsh words heard during fights with Shin Jehyun also stayed with him, never fading. All these elements clicked together like gears, making Baekyung wonder if Sunbae didn’t want a deeper relationship with him.

Yet, when he looked at Shin Jehyun with a sullen face, Jehyun would touch and comfort Baekyung like the gentlest person in the world. Then Baekyung would easily feel reassured, thinking that Jehyun just wasn’t ready yet, not that he didn’t like him.

But with just one sentence, “Then we should break up,” Jehyun had exploded all that suppressed anxiety.

It was unbearably pathetic and sad. If this was the case…

“Only me…”

It seems like only I like you.

Baekyung’s eyes turned red as his face grew hot. He didn’t want to look pathetic in front of Shin Jehyun, but it was too late.

He was like a child throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get meat for dinner. Feeling embarrassed, upset, and humiliated, he wanted Jehyun to understand his feelings, to pamper him. No, if he stayed here any longer, he’d say things he shouldn’t. Baekyung bit his lip and stood up.

“No, I misspoke.”

He shook his head, asking Jehyun to pretend he hadn’t heard, then turned to leave.

At that moment, like a déjà vu, Jehyun remembered the past at the resort when he let Baekyung go and how much he regretted it. Feeling his heart sink, Jehyun quickly got up and reached out.

“Baekyung.”

He grabbed the thick wrist. It felt hot, as if Baekyung was about to burst into tears. His broad shoulders slumped. Although only the back of his head was visible, Jehyun knew what expression Baekyung would be making at that moment.

To make such a puppy cry like this. This is definitely my fault.

Jehyun scolded himself as he cautiously moved in front of Baekyung, tilting his head to look up at his tear-streaked face, just like the day Baekyung confessed his feelings.

His heart ached painfully. Feeling overwhelmed with pity, Jehyun pulled on Baekyung’s wrist, coaxing him like a petulant child.

“Baekyung, look at me. Okay?”

“… Later. Not now.”

The voice calling to him was so gentle that he wanted to act spoiled, but he had to resist.

Various emotions were churning in his stomach. Jealousy, anger, hurt, sorrow—those unrefined emotions could easily lead to an argument that would leave a karmic residue. If not, he’d just end up crying pitifully like last time. That’s why he tried to leave, but Jehyun wouldn’t let him go.

“Ha Baekyung.”

As he turned around, Jehyun gripped his arm firmly, blocking his path once more. Baekyung looked down at him with wet eyes. Jehyun, who had been standing with a stern face, now wore a deeply apologetic expression as he reached out. His long fingers gently brushed Baekyung’s cheek.

“You saw that, the report…”

Baekyung didn’t respond. He didn’t want to admit that he had sneakily read the report. But Jehyun seemed certain that Baekyung had read his human study report. He closed his eyes briefly, then opened them, looking at Baekyung and apologizing.

“I’m sorry, I should have deleted it, I was careless. That wasn’t the final version. The one I submitted to the professor was a different file. It’s on my laptop.”

He had indeed felt something was off. Was it about a week ago? Baekyung started to occasionally stop talking mid-sentence and watch his reactions. It was confusing. Even if Baekyung was initially uncomfortable with the identity overlap between Habaek and Ha Baekyung at the start of their relationship, there was no reason for him to be so cautious now.

Why was he like this? He wondered, and now he knew Baekyung had read that damned report.

What did I write? He couldn’t remember exactly because he had typed out his anger and frustration while drunk, not in his right mind. But it was easy to guess that Baekyung would have been deeply hurt if he read it.

Of course, it wasn’t shown to him intentionally; Baekyung had seen it secretly, but if there was a file with such a title on the desktop, even Jehyun would have been tempted to open it. Therefore, he couldn’t blame Baekyung for looking. Jehyun just hugged Baekyung out of guilt.

“Were you upset? It’s an irresponsible thing to say, but back then… I wrote it when I was out of my mind due to a misunderstanding, so I don’t even remember what I wrote. But because of the file title, you might have been more upset, but it was definitely not the final draft. I wrote it in anger, deleted everything I had written before, wrote this, and saved it as-is, hence the title. I only wrote like that once and then forgot about it.”

“…I know.”

Baekyung knew too. From the day he read the report, he suspected Jehyun wouldn’t have submitted something like that to a professor.

But the fact that Jehyun had thought of him as such a person, even if only for a moment, was undeniable. That was bound to hurt. Baekyung was a twenty-year-old boy who had fallen in love for the first time. He didn’t possess the maturity to take it in stride that someone he loved had momentarily hated him.

“I’m really sorry. It was my mistake. I was careless. Usually, I do my assignments on my laptop. I didn’t realize that file was still on the desktop because I only use Caplet after turning on the computer.”

Jehyun explained in detail, running his hand through his hair. Sweat beaded on his small, white forehead, showing how flustered he was.

“I don’t think of you like that anymore. Of course not, how much do I like you? Right? Baekyung…”

His voice was pleading for understanding, and he continued to stroke Baekyung’s cheeks gently.

Seeing how Jehyun cherished him like something precious, Baekyung felt his heart soften. The hurt didn’t disappear in an instant, but he now felt he didn’t need to harbor such baseless misunderstandings alone. If Jehyun didn’t care for him, he wouldn’t look at him with such tender eyes.

Baekyung hesitated, then met Jehyun’s gaze with his lips tightly pressed together. Looking at Jehyun, who was genuinely sorry and at a loss, he asked,

“Then, what kind of person does Sunbae think I am?”

“Well, of course…”

Jehyun opened his mouth as if to speak immediately, then closed it like a clam, feeling embarrassed. But as Baekyung’s eyes drooped, he quickly shook his head and added,

“No, it’s just, it’s a bit embarrassing to say it with you in front of me… Ah, what I wrote was…”

After hesitating, he finally spoke. Here’s what was in the report:

《…Ha Baekyung is as courteous and upright in character as he appears on the surface. Although he can be occasionally mischievous and playful, that’s only shown to those within his close circle.

In front of those with whom he has social connections, Ha Baekyung always maintains a proper demeanor, exemplifying what a well-mannered young man of this era should be. In other words, he confines himself within the framework of consideration and manners. I truly think this is the most necessary attitude to live in this era.

Outside of this framework, Ha Baekyung has no qualms about rising to meet the expectations of those watching him, going beyond his limits…》

Jehyun described the discrepancy between Habaek and Baekyung like this. That Baekyung lives confined within the framework of consideration and manners in reality. That’s just how he interacts with people.

There was no mention of hypocrisy or hiding his true nature. With Jehyun’s explanation, Baekyung finally felt his crumpled heart begin to unfurl. He felt relief knowing Jehyun didn’t see him as some dreadful dual personality.

“And…”

Seeing Baekyung’s expression ease, Jehyun continued. Aside from the report, there were still misunderstandings to clear up. Jehyun had to take responsibility for almost making his cute boyfriend cry with his unnecessarily direct words, all in the name of pursuing a rational and healthy relationship.

“About what I said, that we’d break up if you held hands or kissed someone else. Of course, Baekyung isn’t waiting for you to do that. I’m not eager to break up either. I just learned that way. My parents taught me that I shouldn’t give my heart to someone who doesn’t treat me with respect. That’s why I said that.”

“……”

“I would be jealous, of course. No, would it only be jealousy? I might be so angry I couldn’t bear it. I might even slap you, or cry and demand why you did that. My feelings and actions in that situation would be separate things, but I would definitely be jealous.”

The ‘right behavior’ learned through education doesn’t always align with one’s emotions. The dreadful assumption that Baekyung might cheat was one of those instances where alignment was impossible. In fact, even without going that far, most things related to Baekyung didn’t align with his emotions and rational thought.

If the ‘healthy mindset’ inherited from his parents had always worked correctly, the two wouldn’t be in this situation. Initially, Jehyun wouldn’t have even met Baekyung when he came to his house while he was tackling a dungeon. He wouldn’t have been swayed by his words.

But even when Jehyun thought Baekyung was toying with him, he couldn’t give up on him. He kept harboring a sliver of hope and felt the desire to cling to him pathetically. If Baekyung hadn’t come that day, Jehyun would have gone to find him a few days later. That was certain. It meant Jehyun loved Baekyung to the point of losing his reason.

At Jehyun’s explanation, Baekyung bit his lip slightly. With a complex expression, he looked at him for a while, then finally gathered the courage to speak.

“…I understand what Sunbae means. I… I would like Sunbae to feel jealous even if I just talk to someone else. Like I do, I want you to be jealous to the point of getting angry just by hearing my voice with someone else…”

“…Baekyung.”

With such honest words, Jehyun smiled. He gently caressed Baekyung’s tense cheek, saying,

“You know I have a personality where I have to say what needs to be said. So I’m saying this. Don’t misunderstand and listen.”

“Are you trying to say something else that can be misunderstood?”

“If you misunderstand, I’ll just clear it up again. Listen quietly.”

At his grumpy words, Jehyun gently pinched and then released Baekyung’s cheek, coaxing him to be patient as he continued.

“You talking to someone else? I might be okay with it for a short while, but not for long. Eating alone with someone else? Doing something with someone else without me? Of course, I wouldn’t like that. But…”

The first part was what Baekyung had hoped to hear. However, the following words are always crucial. He bit his lip, waiting to see what ‘rational’ thing Jehyun would say next.

“Would anything change just because I dislike it? Of course, if it’s someone like Ahn Yiyoung or Do Juwon who you’ll just pass by, we can be careful not to make each other jealous. I told you to be careful because I know that. But the world isn’t filled with only those kinds of people. There are inevitable situations. Once we both start working, we’ll have to interact with colleagues or superiors. Can we be jealous and upset about each one of those instances?”

“Still…!”

“Especially, if I become a reporter as planned, the gender ratio there is particularly imbalanced, so I’ll inevitably have to deal with other guys constantly. When I mentioned mind control earlier, it was because I wanted you to be mentally prepared for my situation, not because I was telling you not to be jealous.”

“…….”

“Do whatever you want. I’m confident I can soothe your heart every day. But I’m worried you might get exhausted and stressed, which wouldn’t be good for your mental health.”

Baekyung’s lips pouted. Defiance was evident in his pretty brown eyes. His inner desire to argue was clear. However, Jehyun didn’t want to argue about this anymore. This was for Baekyung’s sake.

“Lastly…”

And there was one significant misunderstanding that needed to be resolved. Jehyun suddenly felt his throat dry and swallowed. Conscious of his unquenched thirst, he slowly opened his mouth.

“I also want to do more than just kiss with you. But, since you’re still young… I was waiting because I thought you might not be fully prepared. And there’s this talk about how guys don’t necessarily… you know, have to… do that with each other.”

Unlike before, his words were not coming out coherently. His cheeks had turned red with the rising heat. Jehyun lowered his gaze in embarrassment.

Every time he kissed Baekyung, he felt like he might lose his mind. He wanted to do something more animalistic, but he didn’t know how to bring it up, and he felt like he’d be molesting innocent Baekyung if he touched him without saying anything, so his body wouldn’t move.

He deliberately stopped the action because he was afraid he’d lose his rationality and act on his own if they continued kissing, but he didn’t expect Baekyung to be upset about it. That wasn’t the case at all… I also want to do many things with you.

However, he couldn’t bring himself to say it explicitly. They hadn’t even seen each other naked, so he wasn’t sure where the line was before it became sexual harassment. Isn’t it funny for a 24-year-old to be like this? Oh, how embarrassing. Jehyun felt his heart pounding as he bowed his head deeply. With Baekyung silent, both just stared at their feet until Baekyung suddenly reached out and grabbed Jehyun’s forearm.

“…What else do you want to do?”

“Huh…?”

Baekyung’s voice seemed a bit shaky. Jehyun, surprised, lifted his head. There, Baekyung was looking at him with a serious expression, as if he had never been upset.

He had seen that look in Baekyung’s eyes many times before. When they kissed in bed or when he straddled Baekyung’s thighs on the couch to kiss, Baekyung would look at Jehyun with such intense eyes.

That gaze was so hot that it seemed like his cheeks would burn. As Jehyun stood there speechless, Baekyung pulled him by the arm. Their destination was his bedroom.

Now…? Like this…?

Jehyun was flustered but kept silent. He thought if he told Baekyung, who had just been upset about not going further than kissing, that they needed to prepare mentally, he would really hurt him this time. Baekyung would definitely misunderstand.

So… like this…? Are we going to… do it? Sex? Feeling as if the world was spinning, Jehyun followed Baekyung reluctantly.

“…Show me.”

After seating Jehyun at the edge of the bed, Baekyung sat beside him and said so. Then, touching Jehyun’s thigh, he whispered.

“Show me, Sunbae, what you wanted to do with me.”

“…….”

Despite his anxiety, Baekyung’s gaze was unwavering. As expected from when he first showed his displeasure, it seemed Baekyung had made up his mind long ago.

Now, there was no excuse for Jehyun to run away.

At that moment, Jehyun realized that he was the one who needed to make a decision. He didn’t want to hurt Baekyung… but now there was no turning back.

“…Okay.”

Alright, fuck it, let’s do something today. With resolve, Jehyun raised his slightly trembling hand and gently grabbed Baekyung’s waist.

Unlike Jehyun, who had little muscle or fat, Baekyung’s waist was thick. Baekyung, who swam at a pool near the university early in the morning, would run 30 minutes to get there, swim for an hour, and then run back home. Thus, his physique was quite different from Jehyun’s, who sat like a ghost in front of his desk and monitor.

This unfamiliarity excited Jehyun. While touching his own body during masturbation did nothing for him, just touching Baekyung’s body made his heart race.

“Lie down, let’s see.”

Jehyun licked his dry lips and pushed Baekyung down. Baekyung, too, relaxed his body with a tense face. Thud, lying back, he looked up at Jehyun with his arms limp.

“…I’m lying down. What are you going to do now?”

He asked.

Jehyun licked his lips again, then moved to straddle Baekyung’s thighs.

Baekyung’s legs, made of bone and flesh, were firmer than the metal and plastic of the bed. Feeling like he was sitting on stone, Jehyun slowly lowered his gaze.

Between his spread legs, right in front of Baekyung’s crotch, was his center. It looked quite substantial even at a glance, but that wasn’t important. After all, Baekyung wasn’t the one penetrating. Jehyun placed his hand over Baekyung’s belt buckle, thinking about what was beneath.

At that moment, Baekyung urgently grabbed Jehyun’s wrist, his voice trembling.

“…Sunbae.”

“It’s okay, we’ll go slow.”

“That’s not it… how far… are we going?”

His voice trembled, seemingly scared. Jehyun wanted to reassure Baekyung, but he couldn’t hide his own tension. His stomach was churning like he might vomit. However, in front of Baekyung, who was four years younger, he couldn’t act like an amateur, so Jehyun tried to smile reassuringly.

“…I’ll make sure it doesn’t hurt. Don’t worry.”

He was too embarrassed to say outright they were going to have sex, so he answered indirectly, but Baekyung blinked blankly, then asked with a confused look as if questioning why the position was decided like that.

“You’re going to put it in…?”

When two guys have sex, one has to be active, and the other passive. Jehyun was certain he’d be the active one because Ha Baekyung was like a little puppy, and Shin Jehyun was very masculine.

“Ah…”

But after hearing Baekyung’s question, Jehyun realized he had been inconsiderate. Despite how cute, lovely, and adorable Ha Baekyung was, he was still a man. Naturally, he might want to take the dominant role. Realizing this, Jehyun, risking embarrassment, asked straightforwardly.

“Do you want to be the one to put it in me?”

At this question, Baekyung bit his lip and smiled. Then, he gently moved his hands to lift Jehyun off his lap and set him aside. Sitting up, he faced Jehyun with a composed look.

At that moment, a surge of anxiety ran down Jehyun’s spine. Am I going to be on the bottom? Hiding his panic, Jehyun met Baekyung’s eyes. Baekyung, smiling late with his eyes, spoke.

“I… thought I’d be on top.”

With that, he realized it wasn’t something to be decided hastily. Neither he nor Baekyung wanted to miss the chance to prove their masculinity.

Anyway, Ha Baekyung, claiming to go on top, had a flirtatious smile in his eyes. He was clearly not willing to give up the role he had in mind, seducing Jehyun with that pretty smile.

Jehyun quickly understood his intent. Glancing at the hand moving up his waist, he responded.

“Oh, is that so? I see…”

It was a soulless response. At that moment, the air felt tensely pulled, and both fell silent. A strange atmosphere ensued.

Although he might be considered somewhat petty for not wanting to be on the bottom with a boyfriend four years younger, Shin Jehyun had no desire to be underneath. He wanted to make Baekyung feel good, to handle him with care, making him feel loved.

Whenever he imagined doing something with Baekyung, he was always on top. Of course, Shin Jehyun was a virgin, didn’t watch porn, and didn’t want to be rude to Baekyung, so he never specifically imagined the act of penetration, but in terms of position, he had never thought of himself grunting under Ha Baekyung.

Of course, Ha Baekyung was also a man. Wanting to penetrate during sex was an inherent male desire based on the laws of nature. In nature, usually, the larger, more endowed male would dominate. Even when animals establish hierarchy by mounting, it’s almost always the larger one on top, like Ha Baekyung.

But? We are humans.

Humans think far more complexly than animals, and Jehyun had a winning, no, a rational logic for why he should be the one to penetrate. It was a last resort, though…

Absolutely, absolutely! He wasn’t trying to back out cowardly because he didn’t want to be the submissive one. He just wanted to see Baekyung look happy because of him. He wanted to see that cute, pretty face flush with pleasure. Wanting to please a boyfriend four years younger isn’t wrong, is it?

After rationalizing to himself, Jehyun sighed softly. Then, he looked down at where Baekyung’s penis would be and shook his head.

“But Baekyung, I don’t think you should do it.”

At those firm words, Baekyung let out an awkward laugh. His expression showed no room for persuasion, as if asking what nonsense Jehyun was spouting. Instead of waiting for the next line, he sparkled his eyes, appealing himself.

“Why? Why me? I can do it well. I’ll try hard. It’s my first time, but I’ll do my best. I’ll make sure you don’t regret it.”

“I’ll make sure I don’t regret it too. I’m confident, Baekyung.”

“I’m more confident! I can really do it well, Sunbae!”

“I use my body well, Baekyung. You saw me playing foot volleyball at the sports day, right?”

“Sunbae, I swim. Do you know how smoothly you need to move in the water?”

With those words, Jehyun imagined Baekyung moving his waist powerfully in the water. His cheeks flushed, but this wasn’t the time for that. Had he been hesitating for months for this? He thought they might end up deciding by rock-paper-scissors like fools if this continued. Jehyun, wanting to end the debate, spoke firmly.

“I can move well too. And Baekyung, let’s think objectively. Wouldn’t it be better if I did it? I’m older and have more experience…”

But at that moment, Baekyung’s eyes narrowed at what Jehyun said. A cold voice immediately came out from him.

“…Experience? Sunbae, you’re not a virgin? Who did you do it with?”

The cold question snapped Jehyun back to reality. It was a mistake. He was talking about various masturbation experiences…

However, unlike earlier when he was sexually appealing by talking about how well he could use his body, facing Baekyung’s lowered gaze, he couldn’t say, “I’m four years older, so I’ve masturbated 300 times more.” He felt somewhat lewd and petty. So, Jehyun quickly changed his explanation.

“No, I am a virgin… I meant, I was talking about various social experiences.”

At that response, Baekyung’s face softened immediately. With a melting smile and in a cute, coquettish voice, he said:

“That doesn’t seem very helpful… Sunbae, I’ll try harder. They say being on top is harder, so it would be better if I, who has more stamina, did it. Right? Sunbae? Huh?”

Baekyung’s charm was deadly. For a moment, Jehyun almost nodded in agreement but remembered his male pride. He reaffirmed his desire to lead Baekyung magnificently and spoke.

“Oh, I didn’t know being on top was harder? Then I should do it. How could I make you do something so hard? I wouldn’t be able to bear seeing you struggle, Baekyung…”

Murmuring in a tender voice, he gently stroked Baekyung’s cheek. Ha Baekyung, seemingly entranced by the warmth, was about to say “okay” but caught himself just in time.

This wasn’t in the plan. Licking Jehyun’s toes or the top of his feet was one thing, but imagining giving up his back to him was something he never considered. No, this is not right. Baekyung, feeling a sense of crisis, tightly grabbed Jehyun’s hand.

“No, Sunbae. I can do it. Make me stronger. I’ll work hard.”

With that firm voice, Jehyun bit his lips. Neither of them could back down, and the standoff continued. This won’t do. If normal words won’t convince him, he had no choice but to bring up that logic.

“Of course, I know you’ll work hard, Baekyung…”

But there was one dangerous issue in this relationship that couldn’t be overcome with just Baekyung’s effort. Jehyun shook his head, looking regretful.

“But you see, Baekyung. You… that.”

“What?”

“It’s… big.”

“Huh? What did you say?”

At Baekyung’s question, Jehyun’s face turned bright red. He had never in his life had a conversation about genitals, and he felt like he might die of embarrassment, but he couldn’t keep silent here. He had to say it clearly. With his eyes tightly shut, he whispered quietly.

“Your, your penis is too big…”

Baekyung struggled to understand. What does it mean his penis is big? Doesn’t that mean I should be on top? As soon as he raised the question, Jehyun continued.

“It’s too big; it’ll be hard. The person receiving might hurt. So, I’ll do it. I’m… smaller. I’ll make sure it doesn’t hurt.”

“…….”

“If you hurt yourself while inserting it, it would be a big deal. Your corpus spongiosum could even rupture…”

His male pride was crushed, but it was an objective and logical statement. Among lovers, compatibility is important, and if something happened with Baekyung’s visibly impressive penis, what then? Jehyun thought such an accident must be avoided and spoke decisively.

“Sex… is about technique.”

“Doesn’t technique require some capital to back it up?”

“Sometimes, having too much spec can be harmful, Baekyung. So don’t be too scared. If I do it, we can both finish feeling good without pain…”

Jehyun’s resolve was firm. If it meant both could enjoy a carefree and pleasurable sex life, he was willing to set aside his pride. He humbly acknowledged that his penis was smaller than Baekyung’s and was ready to serve him.

“Relax… I’ll make you feel good.”

By now, he should understand. Jehyun sighed softly, summarizing the situation, then reached out again to unzip Baekyung’s pants.

But then, with a snap, Baekyung grabbed his wrist again. “Why again?” Jehyun looked up to see Baekyung’s face, chewing his lips with an unreadable expression. Baekyung, with his cheeks flushed, rolled his eyes, looking both embarrassed and shy. After hesitating for a moment, he spoke.

“I didn’t want to say this before you saw for yourself…”

“What?”

Jehyun tilted his head in confusion. His gaze darkened soon after.

After all this talk of proving how far he had imagined with him, this kind of preamble? And Baekyung seemed hesitant, furrowing his brows as if he couldn’t easily bring himself to say it. It seemed like something serious was about to come out.

What on earth was he trying to say? Was he going to say he was impotent or not a virgin? Surely not… While Jehyun waited patiently, pondering various possibilities, an unbelievable statement reached his ears.

“I… actually, I have a micropenis.”

“…What?”

Jehyun furrowed his brows.

A micropenis? Even at a glance, Baekyung’s lower half looked substantial. Even through his pants, when erect, it looked like he was hiding a 1.5-liter water bottle inside.

Moreover, isn’t the size of the penis usually proportional to height and build? So unless Baekyung had a condition like micropenis syndrome, his penis should have been at least larger than Shin Jehyun’s. Since Jehyun wasn’t small either, Baekyung’s should have been overwhelmingly large compared to other men.

However, Baekyung covered his eyes with one hand as if embarrassed, contradicting Jehyun’s assumptions. Avoiding Jehyun’s gaze, he murmured.

“I, I once mentioned it in a game… that my testicles are like turnips…”

“Turnips?”

“Yes…”

Hearing that word, Jehyun vaguely remembered something. Was it that his penis was like a chili pepper and his testicles like turnips…? As Jehyun nodded, narrowing his eyes, Baekyung moved his arm, avoiding his gaze, and placed his hand gently on his bulging crotch, confessing.

“This, it’s all just the balls… My penis is really small…”

“……”

But Jehyun couldn’t believe it. Given Baekyung’s size, it seemed implausible. Could human testicles really be that big? Could balls have that much volume? It didn’t make sense.

Not believing it, Jehyun reached out towards Baekyung’s crotch without thinking. Baekyung quickly covered his genitals with both hands to protect himself, looking at Jehyun with wide eyes as if he were a pervert. Jehyun shook his head in embarrassment.

“No, I mean…”

He almost made a mistake. He hadn’t intended to touch Baekyung’s penis suddenly. While Jehyun was reflecting, Baekyung continued in a voice full of shame.

“I… it’s so small that before it gets erect… I don’t want to show it to Sunbae… Even touching it is embarrassing…”

…Is it really true? Jehyun bit his lip, looking into Ha Baekyung’s face.

His innocent, cute expression was full of shame. His eyes were moist as if he might cry any moment, his lips twitched throughout his confession of his complex, and his face was red as if it might burst. He seemed genuinely embarrassed, not even meeting Jehyun’s eyes properly. As if to prove his thought, Baekyung added in a dejected voice.

“When I was little, my nickname was ‘Hamgyeong’. You know, the Golden Hamster… Hamsters have small penises and big balls… So, my friends always teased me, calling me ‘Hamgyeong’…”

His drooping eyes looked like they might touch the ground. His voice, on the verge of tears, softened Jehyun’s heart, making him furrow his brows and soften his expression.

He couldn’t bear to see Baekyung, who was so small and cute, feeling so pitiful. He must have been so embarrassed every time he changed clothes in the locker room while he was swimming in middle school. Suddenly, Jehyun understood how he must have felt.

“Was that so? I’m sorry, Baekyung…”

Jehyun quickly comforted him with a gentle voice. He couldn’t imagine how much courage it took to bring this up. Baekyung seemed brave for confessing before they proceeded with intimacy.

Anyway, even if it was a complex for Baekyung, Jehyun didn’t mind his penis being small. Since his own was much larger, thicker, and more intimidating, he could generously let Baekyung take the lead for safe and enjoyable sex.

As Jehyun gently hugged and patted Baekyung’s back, Baekyung let out a relieved sigh. Soon, a pleasing, soft voice came from Baekyung.

“Anyway, they say smaller is safer, so wouldn’t it be better if I were on top, Sunbae…?”

He was right. There was no way Baekyung would lie about having a micropenis, going so far as to sacrifice his male pride. Even if he might show a childish side in Caplet, in reality, Baekyung was just an adorable, lovable little puppy.

Fuck, if Baekyung has a complex about this, does it even matter? Jehyun nodded, lowering his hands.

“You might be right, Baekyung. Then…”

But before he could finish his sentence, Ha Baekyung suddenly embraced Jehyun. Overpowered by his weight, Jehyun found himself lying on his back on the bed, blinking blankly at Baekyung.

“Sunbae, Sunbae…”

Baekyung’s sweet kisses rained down on his cheeks, eyes, and chin. Feeling like a dog licking his face, Jehyun burst into laughter. After the ticklish kisses ended, he could look into Baekyung’s excited eyes.

His dilated pupils seemed out of focus, right in front of him. In the moment Jehyun was slightly taken aback, Baekyung murmured in a thick voice.

“I’ll show you too. How I wanted to do it with you…”

With that low whisper, their lips met. As Baekyung kissed him softly, Jehyun clenched his fists, feeling the tension.

Seeing Baekyung’s face, ready to cry as he confessed his vulnerability, Jehyun made a decision, but the thought of starting made his heart tremble. Baekyung was much larger than Jehyun. If there was a 10 cm height difference, the weight difference was over 20 kg. The thought of him on top was overwhelmingly pressuring.

“Sunbae, I’ll really make you feel good. Don’t be scared…”

But it seemed the trembling had reached Baekyung too. At one moment, as Baekyung pressed his forehead against Jehyun’s, Jehyun let out a trembling sigh. Looking up, he saw Baekyung looking at him with kind eyes.

He was supporting all his weight with his arms and legs to not burden Jehyun. Feeling that tender care, Jehyun’s heart melted, and his tension eased. He reached out, wrapping his fingers in Baekyung’s hair.

“More, ah, harder, suck…”

Jehyun murmured with a sigh, sticking out his tongue. Ha Baekyung sucked on his tongue with force, beginning to move one hand slowly.

Baekyung’s thick fingers slid under Jehyun’s black t-shirt. With a twitch, his slender waist was encircled by the fingertips. Finally touching skin without any barrier, it was as soft as his small lips. Baekyung struggled to keep his sanity from flying away as he slowly caressed Jehyun’s lower back.

“Huh, Baekyung…”

His skin was thin, and his waist was narrow. It felt like his hands could meet if he grabbed with both. Swish, Baekyung lifted Jehyun’s t-shirt and traced his lower abdomen with his fingers. As he gently circled around the indented navel, Jehyun shook his head, trembling. It meant no.

Like an obedient child, Baekyung moved his hand to the side, following the line of Jehyun’s waist down. He finally reached the short shorts he had wanted to peel off for so long.

But instead of immediately undressing him, Baekyung placed his hand on Jehyun’s thigh to satisfy the desire that had been tormenting him many times.

“Ahh, this… a little…”

It’s embarrassing… Jehyun whispered in a shy voice. Baekyung, laughing as if to say it’s okay, kissed him, peck, peck. With those soft lips touching, making him feel cherished, Baekyung suddenly… slid his hand through the pant leg.

“Ah…!”

“I won’t hurt you…”

Baekyung murmured as their noses touched. He wanted to do whatever he pleased with Jehyun, but he couldn’t. He wanted to treat Jehyun dearly.

Baekyung stroked Jehyun’s smooth, hairless thighs up and down. Since Jehyun had said he didn’t grow hair except for on his head and eyebrows, it would probably feel similar inside. Or even smoother… That thought made it unbearable to wait.

“Sunbae, ah, can I touch you…?”

Baekyung’s fingertips grazed the edge of the underwear. Just a little further, and they would cross an irreversible river. It wasn’t fear; it was just somehow embarrassing and awkward.

Jehyun wanted to hide under the covers, but he couldn’t escape Baekyung’s gaze looking down at him. Like someone ensnared, Jehyun nodded powerlessly.

“You can touch… ah, hmm…”

Before he finished speaking, Baekyung’s fingers slipped into his underwear. Tense, the fingertips moved to his groin, then straight to the center.

And finally, Baekyung touched that place which had never felt another’s touch.

Blood rushed down like water from a broken jar. Already erect, his penis swelled even harder, making Jehyun shut his eyes tightly. He couldn’t meet Baekyung’s eyes.

“Sunbae…”

Baekyung’s fingertips continuously caressed between his legs. Running up and down the smooth, hairless shaft, then gently touching the beautifully flared head, he soon moved down to fondle the flaccid testicles in the heat.

Ahh, Baekyung’s panting breath reached his ears. Glancing up, his eyes were tinged with a rosy flush. Jehyun felt a slight relief knowing that Baekyung was also embarrassed.

“It’s so soft…”

“…Don’t say that.”

“Why? I like it…”

Baekyung’s voice carried a light laugh. He wasn’t teasing about the lack of hair… Feeling a bit upset, Jehyun furrowed his brows, but he saw Baekyung’s expression melting into a daze. He didn’t seem in his right mind. And as soon as that thought crossed his mind, Baekyung pulled his hand out from below and said:

“I want to see it with my eyes.”

“What? No, ah!”

There was no time to stop him. Baekyung grabbed Jehyun’s pants and underwear, pulling them down at once.

The sudden exposure to the cold air from the AC felt like madness. Jehyun covered his face with both hands, not knowing what to do. In the military, not having pubic hair was nothing, but showing it to Baekyung made him strangely embarrassed. Unable to say anything, Jehyun bit his lips, waiting for Baekyung to react.

“……”

But even after waiting, no words came. Wondering what was happening, Jehyun lowered his hand slightly. Baekyung, with his head bowed, was staring at Jehyun’s erect penis. One hand cupped his testicles, the other holding the shaft.

“Sunbae…”

Then he spoke…

“Your penis is so pretty.”

Saying such nonsense.

“What are you talking about?”

Jehyun grimaced in response, and Baekyung looked up, laughing. With cheeks flushed bright red, he smiled brightly, then ran a hand through his messy hair and moved closer, his face near Jehyun’s chest.

“Ah, wait a moment…”

Baekyung’s left hand toyed with Jehyun’s glans. The unfamiliar, thrilling sensation made him shake his head, but then his chest felt cool as his t-shirt was lifted.

Now, Baekyung focused his gaze on the fully exposed chest. That gaze was intense, almost perverted. It made Jehyun’s skin feel hot.

Is it always like this? Is this how it’s supposed to be… embarrassing, awkward, shameful, throughout this? Since it was his first time, he couldn’t know.

Baekyung probably felt the same, but unlike Jehyun, who was almost naked, he was still dressed, so there was no sign of shame from him. Only his excitement was palpably conveyed to Jehyun.

“…I want to suck it.”

“What…?”

“I’ll suck it.”

What would he suck? While Jehyun was in shock to the point of his pupils trembling, Baekyung bowed his head. Something wet touched the exposed nipple…

“Ah…”

It was a place he never thought would be an erogenous zone. He was a man, and those nipples were just evolutionary remnants after all. But contrary to the expectation that they wouldn’t give any sensation, the feeling was strange.

Peck, as if kissing, Baekyung pressed his lips to Jehyun’s pink areola, then stuck out his tongue to tickle the tip of the nipple. At the same time, below, his fingertips were gently toying with the tip of the glans. With these unfamiliar sensations coming from both above and below, Jehyun’s body tensed up.

“Ah, huh, it’s weird…”

Every time Jehyun shook his head, his black hair scattered on the bed. The small, pierced ear tips were already flushed red, ripened like apples about to give off a sweet scent.

With his lips still on Jehyun’s chest, Baekyung looked up. While taking in the sight of the handsome face of Shin Jehyun, flushed with excitement, he licked and sucked on his chest.

“Ugh, mm…”

Jehyun, biting his lips to suppress a moan, made a sound that was pleasing to hear. Feeling Jehyun’s penis swelling to the point of bursting inside his triple-layered underwear, Baekyung gripped and shook it from top to bottom. It seemed necessary to relax him first.

It wasn’t hard. He just had to do what he did in his dreams every day.

“Baekyung, Baekyung, I, ah, I think I’m going to cum, ah…!”

His eyes, narrowed in ecstasy, trembled. Jehyun’s sharp features had now softened into an innocent look. Seeing him look troubled as if he was about to ejaculate in his hand, Baekyung found it endearing, so he bit and nibbled on Jehyun’s nipple while tightening his grip on the penis.

The penis, snugly wrapped in his palm, was incredibly slippery. The sensation was amusing, like waves. Each time Baekyung shook Jehyun’s penis, he recalled the smooth feeling of moving through water.

“Ah, ugh!”

Finally, as Jehyun’s body tensed up, he ejaculated into Baekyung’s hand. Hot semen spurted out, drenching his fingers.

Baekyung, with a mesmerized look, watched the semen-soaked lower abdomen of Jehyun and the liquid tangled on his hand.

In dreams, Baekyung only knew masturbation, so he would usually wake up around this point, but not now. The real Shin Jehyun was in front of him. This naive Shin Jehyun, who had decided to give himself over to Baekyung’s cunning tricks, was right there. Feeling a surge of dirty desire, Baekyung sat up.

“Ha, Sunbae, I’ll make it painless…”

He said, looking down at Jehyun, who was panting with exhaustion. Then Baekyung threw off his t-shirt. Without noticing Jehyun’s surprise at his toned body, he knelt down and leaned his head towards Jehyun’s penis.

“No, ugh, don’t do it…!”

Jehyun, startled, tried to push Baekyung away, but he couldn’t overpower him. Holding Jehyun’s wrists, which were pushing him away, Baekyung brought his lips to Jehyun’s semen-covered abdomen.

A familiar yet strange scent pricked his nose. If it had been his own, he might have felt disgusted, but knowing it was Shin Jehyun’s, it was entirely different. Baekyung licked up every bit of semen Jehyun had spilled.

“Huh, ah…”

With each breath Jehyun exhaled, his abdomen contracted and expanded. Baekyung moved his tongue along the faint contours of his muscles.

Lick, after licking his skin, Baekyung’s lips reached Jehyun’s indented navel. “Don’t, I don’t like it,” came a voice in his ear, but he wasn’t in his right mind anymore. Even that small navel was cute and erotic. Baekyung sucked on it like a madman.

Next was the still erect penis.

Fuck. Seeing Shin Jehyun’s penis in front of him made him want to curse. It was as adorable and well-formed as his tiny, pierced ears.

Dark pink, with the tip flushed red from the blood rush, the penis was uniform in thickness and length. It was straight and not grotesque, and particularly, the rounded glans, smaller than Baekyung’s, reminded him of Jehyun’s earlobes.

Baekyung took the semen-soaked glans into his mouth without hesitation. After swallowing the high-viscosity liquid that spread in his mouth, he licked upwards along the shaft with his tongue.

“Ha, it’s dirty…”

Jehyun muttered such things, but Baekyung didn’t care. He felt like devouring even the faint scent of sweat mixed with the skin’s aroma from Jehyun’s groin.

“I like it, Sunbae…”

Baekyung answered while subtly pushing Jehyun’s legs up. With Jehyun’s penis in his mouth, moving his head up and down, he could feel it twitching and growing. He could physically feel Jehyun’s arousal reaching its peak. Consequently, Baekyung felt like he was about to cum too. His penis was about to burst.

Tucking his lips inward, he licked around the crown of the glans, and he saw Jehyun tensing his toes. Shin Jehyun, biting his lips and unable to relax his body, looked cute. Baekyung kept thrusting Jehyun’s penis into his throat while sneakily watching him.

Swallowing it deeper would feel even better, but that was still too much for now. Thinking he needed more practice, he let go of Jehyun’s penis.

“Ah, ha…”

Every time he heard Jehyun’s moan, Baekyung felt like he was going to cum. He wanted to enter him right away and ejaculate inside, but it wasn’t time yet. To give Jehyun an unforgettable first experience so he’d never think of topping him again, he needed to heighten his sensations further.

Baekyung concentrated as if adjusting the second hand to steal time in Mallorca. Peck, peck, he kissed along the shaft of Jehyun’s penis, moving down to suck on his sagging testicles.

Ah, Jehyun moaned, tensing his thighs. The two legs pressing against his head felt just erotic. It felt like they were begging him to suck harder.

“Here, ah, do you like it?”