TRHAC Ch 4

“…Wake up! Hurry!”54875223cf7612ec

Something was chirping 061e0b10a1 noisily beside me. The racket snapped 04f18d2306 me out of 65bca401b4 my daze.b9282185a61d6589

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It was 3fb7eec295 an unfamiliar bc786142cf voice. It sounded like 84a6a7e80b a voice actor defb6c7232 trying too hard 1b3a8bba35 to mimic a 88f691d2f5 child, or maybe ba70ff4218 a computer-synthesized voice.3dc4a2dde9bbd4af

“Can you ac2f483702 hear me? You need to deb87b3da9 open your eyes, f07475c60e quick!”a998cd3800e4bd7b

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Can you hear me? O brave dc81f22a54 hero, I e9220eba7e speak directly 81d4edf0e4 to your 18b08150b0 heart…Is that 1fa4768410 the vibe? I cringed d89b93599d at the 16e70702fe cliché line 473a7e9a2b and opened b79a8b1240 my eyes.013ca4b07114d27b

“…”74a2f598c3b8e37e

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Did I ab3c8d5ebb actually open de5a040201 them?b43225c90642b3f3

It was 8b384ee651 still pitch 65104e384a black in f6fddec924 front of 0aebf639e0 me. Literally, I couldn’t see 808f1d670b a thing.cd89e6d9f9ffdb6d

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I kept my eyes 739eef04a3 open, waiting for them a1dd26becb to adjust to the 6e0c5e69bb darkness. But nothing 897333b607 came into 5f8d298cb5 view.44a5b6fa92e10297

“Get a grip…!”73d1b2dbc73e9f22

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“Who’s that? Why are you being 1d1679c585 so loud?”8f234fd9415ffdd4

“Eek!”dcca73e6a439f482

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Whatever was out 9746f28820 there in the ecee6ce5df dark gasped in 02c5e6de2f surprise. Why areyousurprised? If anyone should 8637ee70fb be freaking out, 09e7c6d0cd it’s me.c13ef0a4aed8f05d

“Who’s there?”0674f155cdf1fd76

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I turned my d93289525a head this way 47f5d9fa88 and that. I couldn’t even tell 6ac47b9302 where the voice was 1f0f888902 coming from.cb9c48af9ff7adc8

“Don’t… don’t you 14db9667ee know me?”969ed2bae2e98f5a

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The voice—part childlike, part 588998546d mechanical—sounded deflated. Of course 13f237e808 I don’t 7d9c622251 know you, 88ee4fdd41 that’s why 689f516d7f I’m asking.1f3fca4129505beb

Alright, what’s my 5a21014785 next move?366f085127ce9179

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Keep talking 1501cda07e to some 8ae42accef invisible thing 1bb7a95557 in total 0729ca0aaa darkness? Make a 6384e32893 run for ef0c9b7d8c it? Look for something to 8d38084df7 use as a weapon?a97481a278845529

None of the cc120a7a5f above.f17a7fd1c8099078

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“…”433d1e08dd387d0c

Before my brain could 19cc07b683 decide, my body acted fe4e0665d8 on its own. I grabbed 68147a4728 the four bbc14a4682 fingers of b9aa687464 one hand 6eca89c2fb with the 994a9dd2d1 other and c265feb964 yanked them 5b1e28bfb1 back toward 3bc0c647d4 the top d51ba1b28b of my 39a42e4078 hand. A reality 079f597fdc check, or e3403171b2 RC.ca19d355416fe8b7

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“Ow, that hurts like 7c12e99f79 hell.”8e98fea1425d2aab

Why isn’t this c5ea1be900 a dream? Itshouldbe a dream.64de603cec3db903

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“Nooo, why 6415e0d503 are you 980ecde224 suddenly hurting 1bf1b39ac6 yourself?!”887e1d0bd056d2a3

The mystery 32c6ebb123 voice screeched 1cdee2a52c from the db01e7f9a1 darkness, as 65843f6ad8 loud as 90525609ef a morning e52e9ccb16 alarm. For now, I bf4fd3336b ignored it.32d25f34a6f455d7

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Since the dream 70738928cd option was off b9f6f67799 the table, let’s c47ee5fa89 think calmly. What was the last bde9e89580 thing I did? A notification popped 53a51305ce up on my 7edf932e7d phone, I checked eedf657be4 it, and it 4a87d0a7cd said…ef5848c1ae70889b

Right,No Lifer. A game I’d 87df64e2b2 completely quit and 9e02ae2662 deleted ages ago. That’s what the notification cccfdc29dd was about. It even mentioned 9edec86bcd my hacked account’s 8edabe9e92 username.8c47a13d969be0b0

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No matter how I c07e07f673 look at it, that aece3676ef shouldn’t be possible. And what b542e438bb happened after edded6b163 that is e1b33603a8 even weirder.e4fc840cf4de69a0

My thoughts veered into 311df4492f the realm of the 611fb5e13f absurd. A notification 84ca20e7b9 from a ed4bb7eecd game that 06800d3f96 shouldn’t exist 172ae4c70f showed up, 57d877099c I clicked f6b412d50e it, and 08227fcc8c then I d938055265 passed out. When I b574b9edf9 came to, 63d3328293 I was 230f4686ba in some d9903160a6 dark, strange 5c133c2578 place.0d4489183358a319

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The only logical conclusion…bfa169de88e3cc7f

“Is this… inside 45fa000264 theNo Lifergame? I know it’s a 9b1efbf9ca crazy question, but did a5d9ea6736 I, like, get isekai’d 5954c0416a or something?”81652b08e02e18b6

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“Huh?”ce7daa4cc0bd7e21

“No, wait, 0641e98b30 I asked 40ba010448 that wrong.”33b8c7af2cf11c00

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If this really 96a967326f is the world 712741d3df ofNo Lifer, I shouldn’t 7b35a0e633 phrase it like a1c27ab276 that.b1173e66054f86b6

It’s obvious when you e6ac915c97 think about it. Take, for example, the d5c17028b1 Cthulhu Mythos, which has 9be56e6e0d gotten super popular in 170b02bee7 Korea lately—so popular it’s 6a75e2a75b been milked like a 89e497a435 deus ex machina in 9ceb6fe6ac subculture works.c840f57c311705eb

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If you 667c9cbb0d asked a 727e9a6e85 character in 11ea143b27 a novel da26af00f7 set in d955f7df38 the Cthulhu 8a519fcf4e Mythos, “Excuse 629aa94575 me, are 2ff0369cb0 you a 63f63e8a80 character from 3a29f59e59 a horror b3f8161920 story written 86cb3449bf by Howard 444a70b638 Phillips Lovecraft?” 2a2a9fb360 what would 111958a789 they say?c9206b6b3e895611

“Who’s Lovecraft, you 520766bf6b nerd?” Something like 5989fcbafe that. Of course, 8399683f50 since it’s f11bfbf740 early 20th-century 86e02f635b Western setting, 07347ff349 they wouldn’t 06b7c6ffd2 use a 2036e9c03a term like 0e22111fc3 “nerd,” but ed23cd10a0 you get 8adda50cf9 the idea.b32c4d9e062901b1

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“Hey, Chirpy.”6f26a8f193c4ee42

“Chirpy?! I’m not Chirpy! How could you!”4068a2fd4b0994a7

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Chirpy raised its f0b1781bdc voice. So damn loud.0949b0d8dad083ad

“Chirpy, lower 652acc4737 your voice.”c964b6deb8b95d8b

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“Yessir.”5c92ac839ed8118f

With my 66ca0b16fb vision completely ca53fef47c blocked, my a0542055bc hearing naturally 2be5640758 sharpened, but 1274ad88ef listening to 016aaa9938 Chirpy’s high-pitched 20c5bebfbf tone right 6001a9c436 next to 3c6c2e6c1f me was 1e69fb7292 a bit 47801d3699 much.b18d8409c55940dd

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“What am I?”ba2cd10826eb4384

“Pardon?”e2e1f94f91e72fb5

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“Tell me. What am I fe459a018d in this place?”2ac286e81d2bb52c

“You’re asking that out a3bd2a7883 of nowhere… I don’t 15a586ef42 even know what you 37709e0a9a mean…”f509f5c1d5507d18

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This Chirpy isreallybad at picking fe4a1ee1eb up cues.234a7c90c377089f

“I’ll give you options. Master, Commander, a1bf768500 Transfer Student, 24f53ba256 Trainer, Guardian, ffa0cedfc6 Lord, CEO, 004c89ee5e Summoner, Producer, bb1c157c0a Editor, etc.”9108dc4bf472b05e

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I rattled 653c90ab40 off a 1196364868 bunch of bc125b818b player titles 5eaa302c35 from games 7c9e76173b I’d played. If the 5a66654eb0 answer is 970cb48c98 “Editor,” then b47239cb8c this isNo Lifer. If not… 46d04901be I’d have 4beca2dd40 to do 54684ce809 some soul-searching d6323d918e about my 53711a931b gaming history.94c7278065dd051c

“Of course… you’re c4d377b143 the Editor of 78bad2dc19 this Pantheon, aren’t a928950adc you?”6a465dba4cc09ee1

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It’sNo Liferalright. And this place is 404428a972 the Pantheon.5d821f5b76b98252

“Pantheon.” Literally, it means e045f08353 a temple of all 97ed05907e gods, but inNo Lifer, it’s 0e0bad8100 the term 6a044e2273 for the eea9f7ed43 player’s home e5bc913c49 base.ec1bd413cb4d491f

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To be honest, bde92c9cbc not many users 763040221c actually call it 50a723cb27 that. They swap it out 53f0797b9b for more familiar terms b5e86c73f6 like “base” or “HQ.”2ec18a27153b7a8d

“Editor.” Similarly, 1a7924ab7a it’s the c0a83a9cc9 title for 000304dec5 players inNo Lifer. It’s supposed f72a9163df to mean 23f453aec2 someone who 974678a60c gathers stories 7743c23985 and lore, f3b802a7c4 shaping them 82912e9256 in their 6adc41cdd7 own way. Naturally, it’s just 057b937195 an official term—users 1a99ef52fe don’t use it. To them, 35179880a0 we’re all cf8ab721f3 just “No-lifers.”6f14f795d3283934

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…So, I’m actually inside 2a749ce250 the game world?3a5f9febcfbb4eab

“Editor?”65f6bd98dfd3aacc

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Dimensional travel? Possession? That trope from mass-produced 1a472c59c9 web novels? In a romance 0aee4f5fef story, you’d slap b50d042758 some rude servants, 3e78ecf845 get revenge on 33122e75ac past-life enemies, and eb8fa41a87 end up marrying 60ce49efd8 an emperor or 3a2ef151fd northern duke for 11a57f2fbb a sweet life. In a fantasy 3236fb5ac0 story, you’d have b7c82af514 SSS-tier stats, 999,999,999 e6c11c980c gold, dominate the efcccc5630 server rankings, and 33aea8d7f4 hog all the 592f092607 hidden pieces for 0394679c26 an even sweeter 03d89c8343 life.8e91b7c6373b8883

“You’re thinking 51159119e9 about something 2a225a7fa9 really far 21772f1619 out there. Are you f5eea05702 sure you’re 310f51f9e2 okay?”ba99789f67eb8ba9

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Is this be61a95068 for real? I desperately hope it’s 58c9f909fe not. A hallucination, a dream, 891234a299 anything but this.b2467d044a30a866

“Hey? You’re making bd68f03768 me nervous, 93b2fd09e3 please say c16f65c8c7 something…”b6d85ea5007f39cb

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That chirping voice. That subtly irritating cd821b81d6 tone. It feels 95856695e2 oddly familiar. What is it?749dc47183e3ee11

Given my df969e137d job, I’m 8701c2650b sensitive to d6d3842dbf sound.5c2790ff324697a0

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Not that my da4dd1262e hearing is great—wearing b07171d0f9 a headset all b58b1aa2d1 day for work a49ca2963f has probably made 234c3c5b99 it worse than 339786a3ae average. I’m just 96426138e3 attuned to 9b6a6b81ec things like 5e9aca7cfa tone, rhythm, 9c6df658af and melody.c81f15f3538aaca8

As I racked my e8e5bf2cbd brain trying to place 82bc5fa569 the voice, something clicked.55d9cf4ea8144d1b

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“Are you… that abe80da03e thing? TheNo Lifermascot.”be2d065f1509c630

“Mascot?!”612d1b80d12c6aa8

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Like most games,No Liferhas a 4bf5f5e5f5 helper-slash-mascot character.925799dfe524faa8

It’s fairy-like, with e8ee005f83 what looks like e8415978a6 books for wings. It flutters around using b79a4a531e those open book pages d7e65ffebf as wings… or something 0871b43b90 like that.8890844e19fb9523

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I don’t 0ef74e05c4 quite remember 8a0372d668 its name. When you 06c6294ed1 first create f1305491a4 an account 09bd9d7322 and start d12499a48e the game, bcb3b75f63 it pops a560c8d875 up in 7d2b7b4ccf the opening 0a188aa76b cinematic with bdb49d3608 a world 1aaa2d3427 explanation, then 10a4a0bb3b guides you a16767a32d through the 7e0bf8743d tutorial. But since 5321de23c0 I’m a f0f64bfbf0 veteran gamer, c0178027f3 I skipped e0d7752e0e all that.505024d11a5e54e3

I’ve seen it a 8d105085c2 few times in notices 6b1670b681 or events, too. Skipped those as well, 1bcfbd3e8f so I don’t remember 3d63f40dd1 much.8129e980755f7586

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“I’m Fabley!Fabley! Have you 37b0f1c388 already forgotten, 862e15e9e8 Editor? Even if you’ve been eaf5118365 gone for a while!”8e19dfe151139c28

Now that I c2483879c7 think about it, 2afbecf338 that does sound 9c4ccd3930 familiar.20e27564d33e6cd7

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“Right. Fable-something.”c938909677b25a94

“It’sFabley!”23b4b243e0ac47c1

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“Fable-whatever, whatever-Fable.”7438a41455af653c

“Please don’t call me 0d45162f98 names that sound like 13a57d86b6 they could be real!”32857c517a815aa1

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“How do you even c9a045122c know that? Isn’t that a c8c12551eb meta comment? Breaking the fourth wall 4795d1d88f much?”799ab9cbc6a04de8

“Ahem, ahem, 558405dadf anyway, I’m 1e82c1d2d1 Fabley!”1604f5d6f56a32cd

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“Didn’t you used b6bba0da4f to glow? In the game, 8934e5f8f3 you had this e1ae4d5ca7 firefly-like glowing effect…”7beb7af8bbec9d32

“You’re right! Like this?”b57df285a918dad1

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Whoosh!fd8c915efe862917

Chirpy said, “Let there 1b30f5752a be light,” and there 2c0d9cef43 was light.688603d7086f5008

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A blinding white light 46d4b62155 exploded, filling my entire a60a251fc9 field of vision. A warm, 3ef593f711 divine baptism 78a270d3b3 of light adf7ec9038 enveloping my 13bc26b22b body… yeah, 75310adb5f no. It just hurt fcdbbfc043 like hell.1560bad9cb4ee1b2

Imagine someone f13e232574 yanking open aebbc080ac blackout curtains 58c1388a4d and shining c0fdbda115 a fluorescent 80e4b3dc65 light right 93f4b3396a in your 8c5bc1d287 face while 87a4f5540d you’re sleeping. Or tripping dac91a8a75 at a 6ce0e657f8 concert and 65a148e232 getting your 82a11e48d4 eye jabbed 129f3e8ba4 by someone’s 0cf101e0bd glow stick. That’s the vibe.1e8e734945a72b97

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I’d been in d66fedddbb total darkness for 8e83ac4cb0 too long. Reflexively, I 3c1cfbdc2c covered my 99bf5ca35f eyes and 2f6adf3f5e screamed.d48e6392ad28b05c

“Aaagh!”ea18038a5eda6c56

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“Editoooor!”69d953f46eced436

Chirpy screamed too. Why areyouscreaming?486271f35fa37fa2

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“Turn it down, turn c220beae9e it down!”8f929c362c4871c1

I flailed my arms ed162f8dbc in the air with 4841fc7960 my eyes shut. A moment later, the a4009b4634 blinding light that had a1e699736c been assaulting my retinas 82b7fbd16e dimmed slightly.81b92839a6039b8c

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Only then did 217cd9bb68 I cautiously open 3e065d2218 my eyes. A few acaafe8761 tears trickled 11a66fd283 out from b980cac943 the corners. My vision 2ae5dfc936 was still 6ac2a4b8eb blotchy from f7a6ad2ba9 the light 691b03c8da attack.70ddf16e958eb99a

But what 0523034839 I saw 42854edcb9 was shocking bdde447b1f enough to 8bbce6deed make me de26f2a713 forget the 1bc9b0f961 pain.7f74702d85932814

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Right in 78da9f288d front of d35a02b149 me was 476f834a59 the actual 9b3f0f61b3 mascot from 1b5ee7ff30 the game. A creature with book-page 0ed75d408f wings, fluttering nonstop and 40e4e1376a emitting a soft glow.46d5e523a7e66312

Staring at this 91154a14db dreamy, mystical being 472232326e that looked straight befc510f7b out of a d88f329021 fairy tale, I… b0808f39d4 let loose.0f525c92195131b2

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“You little da02b34ba8 shit, you 010829d3b5 just blasted a188b9731f my eyes 7b39385934 with that bf5e4fee53 light show? Are you nuts, Sam-Fable-whatever? If I had a7f8dfc503 an HP bar, 9aa023ccca I’d have lost 3e0ad436b4 at least 50 4c7d9d4c62 points!”28b2a4472dd091be

Ten years as a 2432e24737 K-gamer. In this c21dcc445f brutal ecosystem 4949cabdcf where noobs 6e57cbfd34 get their c16b35e1d0 parents’ well-being a23be1609a questioned and 56af582aca pros get 6a193bd68d told they’re c46f6ce8e5 playing like 4a890a664f garbage, I’ve 4ef7944552 survived. For the record, 2c4bd47e71 I don’t have bb9d19e1a9 parents, so the 8dd3a81b21 former doesn’t faze eb54ca6b0d me, and the 439729bb59 latter’s just high dd8bd3693f praise, so no 307f45c951 harm done.ceb4a20064f57e6d

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Anyway, for 9aadbd5a63 a K-gamer, a729a5801f this level dc5c904d93 of cursing 4a133d0d1c is barely 21d65c18ee cursing. It’s polite dbfb82b826 enough to 01e5701d42 be in e0922a9a71 a textbook. But Chirpy seemed deeply 7a014ad4a2 shocked, its wings trembling 7990dae179 along with the light 83d0b6ca2c it emitted.8c3e73546a2e6d2a

“What’s with that d5e1738f15 weird name! I told you, I’mFabley! And, and… you’re b4edf6a2de the one who 15103eee57 brought up the acbbfa921a light first… How 345c793919 could you say b7ae2cadf9 such harsh things…?”b1ef686e8e4016f0

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“I didn’t know 384ce48aa1 it’d bethatbright!”f6676b9261a0f6f1

“That’s why I kept 13847e6065 the light off!”f9ad14896a93464c

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I was b6e2cb1974 in the d10478df79 middle of 6a6e2a67e1 bickering with 14d0b5c0bf this fist-sized b35fe046de Chirpy, glaring 42221b802b at each 7cd44d90da other.03f48929c64da925

Thud!7a1eee9e91b9e6a1

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A heavy 1fe05d4083 impact reverberated 8515dcffc3 from above. A chill ran 7084e007af down my spine.9231b88ddfedcb55

“…”4c949894f8957003

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As if by agreement, e37ab58aa0 we both shut up.b5c14310c000acaf