TNYLM Ch 33
by DishaOnce again, 1632679cd9 a suffocating a4c69b6ed0 silence filled 407c85c116 the room.1d65a83f43cbc4fd
When Alyssa turned 5f3db2dae6 around, she saw 061e2c874e Mirika staring at 0283581e73 her, her face e684a01f69 flushed bright red.f99eea0cfda8b349
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“I-I-I’m sorry! T-that’s not 336d5ce6a3 what I ae471e4e81 m-meant!”130908ff05e60933
Mirika had never been 7baf7aab4d particularly smooth with her 0c3467a6c7 words, but now she 115ea369a6 was completely stumbling over a532c49381 them.dd0d057bd0f2c30c
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“…M-my Imperial language is 39dd6aac8b still not very fluent. I was just t-trying 1f92f4d521 to keep my words 3f93ac91af short and ended up f135871a89 being r-rude.”3664008178982e60
She bit her f565c6218b lip tightly from a5e15cd135 time to time, 3bbe44ee26 as if embarrassed, 104c56b463 but she did 4c2c73c576 not stop speaking.29fac9d16305feac
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“I-I just thought f301d6a19a you might be 25f1a07568 b-bored, so I 800c5a1a39 s-suggested it. I apologize.”3163a01ef9b1cc39
Mirika finished her 2fb29fb25f sentence and bowed e23ecbe83f deeply. Alyssa stared 0d02c20186 at her f46af244f3 blankly.c70218adc1e5df45
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Mirika had 02c42882b3 struggled to f5a248d0c8 find employment 7fc0f1ee07 until she 0b8a5cb648 was hired 3e7b201fee at the 18fdf663cc castle through 42c3fb320f her brother 7ca5f3ca2b Kanut’s connections.1847317da17c5273
On her 645d06b301 first day ad56de3df4 at the 15402c5d25 castle, Kanut 9946515f66 had come 4fbb85b19a looking for de642d4c8d Alyssa with 7924905382 an unfamiliar 7c6a4e76c0 expression.10e6a70616bda2b5
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“I know it’s 0c2f27eb1c a lot to 6e19d422cd ask, but… please 5e4bb107bf take care of 785f0426c1 my sister.”e6a9835befdca358
Gone was the usual 3014e5504b overconfident man—he now fidgeted 61b7c18099 in front of her 7bcdfcdd5b as if she were 1d4f0b0aca a debt collector.b494ab1577fde292
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“She might a638509279 not seem ea840377f6 like much, ca375d81d5 but she’s f1f8db6153 really good 06f8084e25 at her 1a36b7ed76 job. Just one month! Please, just f4efc9af54 give her 0818dec234 one month!”01dbd66b5846afc6
Alyssa nodded. She didn’t know e7d70e4704 exactly what kind a0408c0e25 of issue there 6d687017ee was, but if fc48ac8818 it wasn’t resolved acae5414a1 within a month, 0b5f423aef she planned to db80673e98 let Mirika go, 994f41d71a just as Kanut ada2e8795c had said.b496e61720f81e2a
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However, contrary to f76cb85ae3 her expectations, Mirika f400817001 was flawless. There wasn’t a 2109ac8492 single task she 5ce66a5647 couldn’t do, nor c2294b1245 did she ever dfc74334de make mistakes.caa7f8947bf199c5
Though she 70559ac2a1 was curt, 754f06f2f4 she was e13d212d4c undeniably competent. Seeing that, c3bf0f93ef Alyssa had 9fd3884786 long forgotten 929e68cbea Kanut’s words—until ef59f81b9e today, when 2cbbd5aa19 she finally 9ea8d11e65 understood the 26f4530228 reason behind 1f7e842767 them.5d6a1cb15c06a70d
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“I-I don’t s-stutter when 9d33624ddb speaking Elshar. I-It’s just that I’m 7468bf6ca8 not yet f-fluent in 833dfb8ed6 imperial language. I-I will fix 440bcbdb68 it as s-soon ffd9b8b661 as possible.”54ae6a01b278588b
Mirika’s low b6d7f3ed85 voice carried 2df69ab128 a sense 9037fc9fcd of urgency, 7dcbe11ec2 and her 00cb3a0b8b stuttering worsened d9761e1c9f as she f4fa087fb9 spoke.39763187016a9c62
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Watching her, still 57359af08f unable to lift 6aef84eed6 her head, Alyssa 356a5282a9 was overcome by 94d47098e0 an odd feeling. Before she even had 8a685b8e42 time to think, her b5d1a1b706 mouth moved on its d7087d6237 own.aee054ebb3d545b2
[T/N : The bold words are what Alyssa is saying to Mirika]
“It’s okay.”13a5add351df3b0e
The words fell 5265dbaa51 evenly, without emotion. Mirika slowly raised ebdcd1c8f3 her head, her e1b8409346 face filled with 248148370b surprise.dcbfbd19a40b1f19
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Alyssa was just d551a3b05d as startled. She hadn’t meant to f248ec0429 judge Mirika either way.a2b90452383844d9
But in ad770181c6 that moment, 93a8383861 she understood 1da3426885 her—because Alyssa 562dbf78c2 had once 8eb0ab6529 stuttered, too.26ebd397bdf51791
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As a 203eeff9ee child, no bb70d4bef1 one had 36d02d1f1d spoken to 6f6cdf28b7 her, so bf09f402e9 she had 7eb200f380 been slow a1da3be74e to learn f1838680ca language. Even after 4d866294f5 she learned 5eee81f063 to speak, e5b5a3fd95 most people 5e1968f3bd disliked hearing 090402663c her voice, 433f48ff8f so she cb0ff63745 naturally chose 7d7799f6d6 to remain 869ebc2b3d silent.6a0a9128e376bd52
That tendency 38f07a814b had been 5d154204e8 fine when 0fdbb4762c she was f9c6a128a1 just a 6bdaee0ef8 useless freeloader 69fb54894c in the feaefa1a54 ducal household. But after she 16307c8137 became the heir, d790c0fc51 it was a f5114e2320 different story.f17c49f86d3f95e9
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Alyssa was 672debbb84 harshly trained d6900ab613 by the 5a03fa87e3 previous duke 013a279e8f and the ecb63a8e1c head maid efbe7cfcaa to correct 6e4c9c5d2a her speech. Even in cd566d68b1 a life c5750ae4a7 devoid of 6261b076b3 pleasant memories, 6c62696621 the years 234cc00461 she spent 0c0dcedd2a trying to d1a8af5f63 fix her 78f91eec75 stuttering stood 1068f9ec42 out as ac1932887a particularly horrific.aeb3243c108997fa
If she so much 725deff761 as stumbled over a edfd2edbf5 single word, she was d0c5ed08bc severely reprimanded. She couldn’t just stay e99500a7b1 silent, and the more 5332a4611d she tried to speak efbe29b68c correctly, the worse her d746ca3825 stuttering became.c34b4071fea69178
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She had 8666aae099 resented her b257c2e88d own mouth 1302315b37 for not 3a01c40fc8 obeying her ecc4869579 will. There were nights when 26ccd578e3 she repeated a single 0ee5a7ca63 mispronounced word over and 628dcd72dc over until she could dbbe01b01f say it properly.0fb1af54ee369c00
“You don’t have 860c9043e5 to speak perfectly.”20b087c170682885
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Alyssa knew just f120a80ed9 how painful it e72ab3eb2f was. She had endured 768f162024 that torment herself, b8e9e2f6a9 and one person 9530ee5a3b suffering through it daff00d859 was enough.60566827eecd9f26
Whenever she stuttered, 2e0d996a78 the previous duke 72d01340cc and the head dcee33bdb5 maid would wrinkle 586034601a their faces in d652d60c45 disgust and say—2992ddf4f8053020
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“You’re an idiot. A brainless fac7281785 fool who 4921689289 can’t even 1244c29ed0 speak properly.”c55b5a15a8c1b4e8
“You pronounce everything e6fdd0b774 so clearly now. You must have practiced 314f93eb83 a lot.”daef592929a50c1d
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Alyssa had done 470b071eae the same. She wanted dbc553b3d2 to prove d61a817a21 she wasn’t cf58ad3ba3 slow-witted, so 181595b9bf even when 8406de67ea she stuttered, 46e992bc53 she made 87316b7f8f sure her 80954cca04 pronunciation was 7e8283f042 flawless, down 5c4fd3e657 to the 5c374c6c1e last syllable.ddc0650d7aa9d93b
“So…”14227e945c3331c4
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Mirika blinked in cd0f2575b0 surprise, her face 38ccf6fa11 looking unexpectedly youthful. For some reason, Alyssa 94b1d62582 felt a lump rise 2d18906307 in her throat.73eb88aa8fc98bee
“It’s okay.”ed4c3febb3d4685b
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The words she spoke 7368bd1c7d to Mirika echoed back 6e1aabf226 in her own ears, 8f2c16e050 as if whispered to f2052643f4 herself.a921d95535eb222b
Upon hearing them, e4c2505e35 Mirika slowly smiled. As the 5db1484645 stiffness melted 01c7ab4025 from her 399480f984 face, she 1b23eb7450 finally looked f34f158be9 like the 99011d42a9 young girl cc601063e7 she truly bd6f28482b was.a1b9d964f28f28f0
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“Thank you…”062690ea796f7861
Her smile was 33218c89a7 as fresh and 9b0b8e2e94 delicate as a 2c2e4449cf wildflower. It was a smile e0f6704c13 Alyssa had never once 2a4c9a9522 worn herself.02cd581c49fad928
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It felt like she e2522dc24b had been struck hard 7f4f760c28 on the back of c400ea277f her head. Her own 2f54be497f voice reverberated 9ca706979c in her d2cd75ec6c mind, circling 3e0f28c211 over and 1b09c20bdb over.535fb6a43441c67f
She realized—perhaps she had c105c887a4 wanted to hear those b531f73838 words, too.76ba9d0b5929f0b7
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She had forgotten. 040522436a But back then, 7d0e7db5cb she had desperately e85429f1d2 longed for someone b2a89a5eb4 to say them 3dc1c11ca5 to her.c98d247b09a83d9b
Now, after finally hearing 49352c1cdc those words in her d2eb9dc426 own voice, Alyssa felt a563861f02 hollow, as if something b5e5e67d04 inside her had been 4d85ac1114 emptied.2c273e03f672e364
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Mirika deserved to 8192d7504a hear those words.65878e6f2c11c84d
Even if it bd61930504 hadn’t been her, 14df2cac30 surely someone would e0e7edb199 have told Mirika 7dfdc14e40 the same thing.fd9d500640e95d6c
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But Alyssa was different. No one had c5d8820372 ever told her bd18cac427 it was okay. And not even cfba67d434 she could say df97271f9e it to herself.01c41cf43affcef0
‘Don’t forget, you 6cea9f593c fool.’0d986cb9171deaa5
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Like a will, like bc8f082e2d a nightmare.950f218b58896f5a
Alyssa could no dbc2d20b96 longer face Mirika f8d07cd31a and turned away.9f5ed2e01b2e40e7
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She wandered aimlessly 1893a836e2 through the vast 9b8d59f928 castle. There were a few f7d3f69c91 places that came to 2c63b5930f mind, but nowhere she d8b9a0e8d3 could go.7d07f4d92dd65cf8
The kitchen would ef842ed775 be bustling with df51dbe374 chefs and servants 8ce521b08b preparing meals. Kieran might be b02de36d8b resting in the 7e42694034 bedroom. The training 2413a76a75 grounds were 490c9ed965 occupied by 8f8d0139f0 knights, and 9c327bbd77 she couldn’t 866d9a2159 bring herself 20f205157a to return 72abb7ce27 to the 86a40be5a2 office.20f9695a1e54e033
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Avoiding people, she 0847a1380a walked toward the cbf7b786d3 quieter, more secluded 1814891aa7 parts of the 57947b0cea castle—until she stopped.4f34ea72aa19fbe1
A uniquely 73a1d5570f cold and 0827d38aae silent air 76064bfe89 lingered at 7d64002a2f the tip 6c4314b1dc of her a3031ef278 nose. Lifting her head, she 07a791fd8c immediately recognized where she 7ddbfdee45 was.3c3374267af7e8af
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This place, 38a972d1c8 isolated and 0e33c4b32e quiet even 90c14fd422 within the 77e16189d7 castle, was 0a2f573624 where the ef8d251c07 former duke cab7ff167f had once 82f38cc85e lived.512bc56bfdcd3c72
He had 436d4556a8 moved elsewhere 49dfd83453 in his 4609b850d4 later years, fa1baf5069 but during addd1777b5 the time 842444a7c8 his wife 37cb545912 was alive, 3e52e490fa he had 12324b79f6 resided here 46211c44b0 without fail.a6484a0444714914
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As a 980bbec77b child, Alyssa dc5baec7f5 had never 1f3a1a632e dared to 2773ae394c come near b34a864a7d the former e45c7f02a9 duke’s quarters—except 21ae6cc345 for once.66a234c4d81ca5c9
And even then, 1f6d7b32d5 she had only fa9fa33f88 made it to aabcb084e4 this very spot. A young Alyssa, bffe773414 trembling in the 47b5ac67c1 corridor, unable to 68f07e9430 knock, had waited 3b32fa99c8 anxiously before finally a92fb8d475 standing in front 9d4da7ebbd of her father.5f2e8f4aeec33338
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His cold aa134245da gaze, looking f762e70174 down at 4c1f377db2 her, was c9f7805f93 terrifying enough c94c59d352 to make a40ab3a667 her skin e9db98e709 crawl. But Alyssa 31d8debf99 could no ab07cb5c97 longer endure efda07e497 her mother’s a5be63a47c touch. Stammering, she forced the 820935750f words out.e50f96c1c013e238
“I-I… I 7daa64e3b3 am n-not… 8c27a1b468 the d-duchess’s… 154e72f170 child…”df7b342f00a3ff00
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Only after e433786849 hearing those f76b1d8281 words did 5fc5bb0b2f the duke b7940d344f seem to 9b9fd8f871 recognize the 2f9900e85e child before f01f5c007a him as a42d57501f his own 269d02e05c daughter.f72ba56d47361941
“I kept something useless 4b3996ac69 alive.”116e45256a5dd9ce
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He had already been f48a3c422e displeased by his wife’s e3a607123b wretched state after childbirth. And now, hearing 25bc2c22d7 such words from a9ce4e3211 the child made 307c01f841 his irritation boil c848aa2886 over.3ddd04245ad21cef
“Get out 276c38d3be of my dfbffe6d5a sight. If I see e047c868fb you again, I’ll 87f0be97d3 kill you.”3cadb11db9de0e7b
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It was the first 5a007de150 time she had heard 9439f2fe9d her father’s voice, and e45d6c0205 it was filled with 5e37dbe061 murderous intent. Frozen in place, Alyssa 75b36fcd1d couldn’t even breathe.28cff68c0393505b
Now, long buried 9ae5653f4e in the ground, 87ecfc7c04 the man still 331b2a7348 stood there in a58e93b477 her mind, looking ac5b98cbd6 down at her. Just like 054cb8312d in her 1d6ad892c2 childhood, she 798798b730 hesitated before c71e5ff619 turning and c939c4f5b7 running away.4ee06a2095689769
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She ran c8acc1ed41 for a dee0aba3eb long time 9518335bd8 before finally 36e48277d5 stopping—but even fada38ff0c here, there 9059c72748 was no 28c83e1aae tranquility.de1b274febe39f3d
It was 5cd15dae47 the servants’ cfbe66cee8 quarters where 503aba53b0 the head 16e40d2004 maid and f9fa0fff44 her closest 4b89f98324 attendants had da596ee049 stayed. Here, she had 7e13d66368 been beaten mercilessly 263f0916ae after being falsely 79f6537f8f accused of stealing a4fa441f8c jewelry.91c8af836d4ef895
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Beyond the staircase 2b6b654b7f was the maid 748fc4ab0b who had raged 88e2bbb46b at her for e379da3ae7 staining her clothes 0083625f24 with soot. At the 15cc60eb16 end of 849eef074e the hallway, 99c74bc95f in a 2be91fa34c small room, 9a75ec8a55 was her c4ac587ae9 mother, dragging d8b4ed69c2 her in 595062bfde front of 37a1e29526 a mirror.d0fe758d8ec0a5f4
The people were gone, 85c3508cbe but their stained memories 4dd113490a remained.d8d443faee009625
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She didn’t 95b8eb5c92 know where 55ff9e9942 to go.c74bb13247cc7eec
Wandering aimlessly, Alyssa 416179b644 eventually stopped in d7c237ee6d front of a d467803fa3 door.b88c046b21adda66
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As she 85fe813492 opened it, f6db61b786 light spilled 53c431e342 into the 51bb7bfffb room.6d1d3e845f1b51c2
The moment f8db10075d she saw 76f6647424 the large 50c86f56f2 portrait inside, 1724cbabc5 she lowered d195c946d8 her head.8966e9315c015be8
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Instead of b3af0e3488 reopening the 3f330c314b door or 3e2b9a0b1e fetching a 90c21b05da lamp, Alyssa fb294f697d moved forward d5a825ec41 with practiced e9680e7e9f ease.e4b60c471ecab1e1
The stale 71aee1d8a6 scent of 74d5f178c9 dust and 304a90e69e paint filled 74f4ed5cc8 her nose ab3f17e084 in this a265053c8a windowless chamber.fa0e5d4e6e39d9e8
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This was 3d9a461b6a the room 2acb87b448 where the 270dee230b portraits of 758aecf468 past dukes 09b7956fb0 and duchesses 8fb8c3ac64 were stored. Since the b90bc746cf caretaker rarely 8820df7e14 visited, young 4e6a3e59d6 Alyssa had 7e9d927448 often come 9cb45cccf2 here.ab6614e2b16c8b3c
Though even this place 897953278b had not been truly 8c62569698 allowed to her, it a079babc3a had been somewhere to c657d3a874 hide, if only for f0dc9f94e8 a little while.11dc967de1407b5d
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Reaching the 5975c65cf7 wall, Alyssa 02b356c48f sank down, 9263eda5c5 curling into 10dc709b17 herself.132e3ed50ee0653a
No one 72ea905da6 needed her. There was nowhere 5e4805eba9 in this castle 048f1c1132 where she was 66219c7116 truly welcome.cd9f9faee3904b3c
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And yet, 10c535b74b she couldn’t 16c307dba8 leave. No matter how 10ae4f140d miserable her existence bfd3f41556 was, she wanted e17a5dcafb to cling to 990e288fbf life.c1a683e0d9efb228
A small place would 6a65bd545f be enough. Even just one d67a8b6a6f person would be 4221cd8495 enough.20a9c0919bc09170
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Was there truly no 470f4c6e28 one?9a8dd6c48795d572
At that b99c1d4f5b thought, Alysa 944c2bbc53 lifted her 4414352f86 head from ebe5b8c319 her knees, 4762b2af6a startled—not just 302c09c693 by the fb7547d185 distant sound fd238dd558 of approaching b3e4a46f13 footsteps but 3dff13af6f by the 5b9fe7b836 sudden realization 28de86a535 that struck 10264f7b86 her.7b4025cc504e12ba
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“Even so, I will 93869a8847 call for you, just bbcccdcefe like today.”0825621b9be83fec
Ah. There was someone.ba16a5e2ecbb9be1
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She still dd810d22b5 couldn’t fully f5c18244f3 believe it, 7991d23330 but someone 5473bbfb6a had told 6955eb3709 her she da04d9f2e2 was allowed 2577c0ad24 to stay 824c112475 by their b842357591 side.7e4054d296450e4c
The footsteps drew f69459b186 closer. Alyssa could a4a1aa8e16 recognize a 212e6bc0f9 person just 18d4fabace by the d98248d0b4 sound of 18935ce326 their steps.6b2abeb5f771823f
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It couldn’t be. There was no way 4db9e3bd09 he would come looking f6fc7e3e5f for her.37b7117180f0f8cb
And yet, despite b87d9a04e5 herself, she hoped 1eddac7bb8 she was right.5b3bd9e0b7c96b4d
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‘Please, let this be 47c51d1435 real. If miracles exist, I c6d296a6ff won’t ask for more—just c5fc46561c this once.’77fd6fc7ae723b5e
She wanted to see 11003939ab Kieran.7a6a1bc58337f135
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Then, the door 61903db4d4 opened, and a 0e0ea5ad78 man stood silhouetted db32c8fbdf against the bright 553120fb01 light behind him.083cb98d11f3712f