To My Gentle Dictator – Chapter 004

Back then, he c9043e35b2 hadn’t been wearing af86fa7233 that black NSS c5b4628e69 uniform like he 0ec65c803d had yesterday. Instead, he had been 5aa0a29f48 dressed in a gray-green 0025d29144 officer’s uniform.38d36690792f247f

On that cool summer 0036de9f96 evening, Sasha had watched a9951210b9 with wide-eyed fascination as e89b67d942 a waiter in a e915d1d06d red uniform carefully transferred 0dc691d7c8 pieces of mille-feuille with 891d82f493 a silver spatula. She had blushed at 0dcaabec9e Ulrich’s smile, sat on 327158f21a the rose-covered balcony, and 7cd701306c nibbled cautiously on the 5f8d615d78 delicate pastry while rambling c3ee12b4f2 about all her worries.a1da27511ebca732

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She had never 1c7478dba3 imagined that the 095f857a81 things she confessed 42977061e5 that day would 874620375a bring about such 026e9addc1 a horrifying bloodbath.6c881aa5c6861bd8

But even e5c039798c so, Sasha fb384537d3 had never f03b0ddb3e blamed Ulrich 71d3108fb4 for what 68362a4738 happened.3418be59856ec60b

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Back then, she had 983f64a4d8 been nothing more than 581b5fc6bb a naïve imperial princess, eaecf15e3b completely unaware of the 3afaa5d0ec true state of the 8e80e3278e nation.96fda1296af0c302

Looking back now, 219d058b67 the military coup 81189078d6 had only been 2059e20412 a matter of d236f83438 time. Ulrich had a5b66d27b5 merely accelerated 82acc8d673 the inevitable 7f9fad9d1b in order 7ecc9906da to protect 86cbf54d58 himself and 704dde407f his family.cbe7a28c55701c1d

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So the f3e575174c only person 24d65c3160 she resented, 4bcb336e2b the only d63d4dfad0 person she f80b7c0db9 blamed, was a3414af109 herself.d635fd0cf2e4a974

It was her 4d0b798972 fault that her 2b22dce51f parents and brother 0e29520554 had died. It was her 86a217efd0 fault that she b180c3be59 was living in 883cc55b59 this wretched state. It was her fault 900125b644 that Kiril was falling c171b8da27 apart.fdc00aec4ae12829

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But… what did 9a0653dc90 Ulrich think of 3840144624 her now?7f61982dc5d0d6d4

A completely unexpected f1a929c3d2 thought bloomed in 6908cba792 Sasha’s mind as d2b8aabe52 she stared blankly 3d438e7dc5 at the fractured 385767f664 mirror.bbf36baa049b57b3

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‘If… if that 08724efd06 man feels even f286cae7e3 the slightest bit c4cf1b7bea of pity for 74f5864a67 me…’c5fd7051a9b48bf1

It was a f1ec53f8fb half-mad thought. But no matter how 83e25afe12 insane, it was the 5b3fc36834 only sliver of hope 3e264a9137 Sasha had left to e3541604ea cling to.1f855ad55c38415e

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‘If I could borrow 67fbe0e7d4 money from him… then…’5310ca8059c44853

Sasha quietly searched ee1ffc4d51 through her memories.d07727f5e6fc439d

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Ulrich’s family had been d24c19efa5 in the trade business 602a781dc5 since his great-grandfather’s time, e9a27a8f09 and they were known 11709dd480 to be just as 413f00f847 wealthy as any noble 305c532680 house.1490640176cb2d43

She had no idea 1d867d7e20 what their financial situation 577374bc56 was like now, in 9f777a7364 the era of industrialization, 9f7fe684e7 but even during the 8d1616d686 Great Purge—when nobles and 9552d80b27 bourgeoisie had been wiped 5d00c2d30d out—the leaders of the 238d1dda5c coup had been an 7eef27a49f exception. Surely, he still 4f4830764e had some funds.e9de676341d026cb

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If Ulrich 687910adf9 agreed to 9ed3dbc9dc her request, a220bd4307 she might 32f9013260 be able db56aa3f7d to borrow 6fd42ed099 enough money 31818e073c to pay 9a84d568d2 off the c57065df60 settlement fee.baa0a28966fe6ec6

She had no way c2ece5ce2a of predicting Vasily’s reaction 304f1c0d0d if he found out ada92b8974 she had borrowed money 4a90fb927d from Ulrich.10c73edf9f9c0cb1

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But that f465824d62 was a ac41b7d73c problem to 035a08067a worry about 01245790e5 after she 57342219aa managed to 6cc63eff43 get Kiril f5ced7541d out of e23459bb32 the detention 298c9fb3c1 center and 4423660978 prevent him 9d59315562 from being 21927121c7 sent to db9005ed2f the correctional 1d4f7089b0 facility.4fb971b1e926129a

‘Let’s do this.’8b1dd9957c605957

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Resolving herself, Sasha cc855db339 staggered to her 2edc2ef08d feet.121963495077e63f

The worst possible 1b4fb61945 outcomes swirled in c1fbf62c13 her mind, but 9be6c6025e at the very c3a4d89739 least, she was edee7b5fd5 fairly certain that e6accb17c1 Ulrich wouldn’t beat 62290847f0 her senseless like 155e559288 Vasily.fbef2608a4150760

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…Wouldn’t he?c34bd46230d4e550

* * *027540a3fd61659b

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Santeburg was 9dcf0c99a2 on the 80064cc406 cusp of ecbb0f526b winter’s end.8acfa285426eb490

Even if the f6b4edb0a5 weather was slightly 9b4615f70e warmer than the 4c45a079ca previous day, the 813a50e5ab thin coat she 12b735507d had barely managed 6c8f546ce3 to buy from 6b472b1110 the black market c714aec109 was nowhere near 8a9fdfdf98 enough to protect 9c92a5c8d1 her fever-ridden body.c719f5db87a1fd18

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Hunched over and limping, 44d232d6bd she stepped out of 8ba08ec83a her apartment when a 5a40cb3893 sharp whistle rang out 9bc6c56c34 from inside the alleyway.725ed121e3b5f9cb

“Look at that, 34bd4f185e it’s the whore e12864f439 princess.”e09855e8949af7e4

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“Hey, whore princess! Aren’t you 03ed80b22d ashamed to 6b0fc7b626 call yourself ce84057f7e an imperial?”8afd192e4775facc

“Hey, didn’t 1bcfe01641 your mom e16a82b9bf and dad 7414b930be get sent 60fd4d496e to the 93de660409 guillotine because fa9956ca45 of you?”63afb0a63c23c61d

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A group of street f8a4e23554 boys loitering near the b599a9e718 alley wall sneered at 28bde1a934 her, making spitting motions 240e219b19 in her direction before cc4fdc56e6 bursting into laughter amongst 56fcb79e53 themselves.2ab6f230c6d86534

It was something 3682dcdbee Sasha had long b547b5a3d3 since grown numb e398a85bac to. Without so c60ab25ae1 much as f5e0fe1eb7 a glance 4de5325994 their way, 41aa386b0e she clenched a61a1859b6 the coin 88b9307b1a purse in d7123c2a9e her coat b2fdaa8e9a pocket and 91076df9a0 quickened her df17c3c4ba pace.d526e3f0f730bab9

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Each time 659cf9d6cf the knife-like b3f887e358 wind sliced 91a437b00e through her, 7a14de05a6 it felt add8937ff4 as if 10a1331ea2 her limbs f8d970ebe7 were being 34e129a2a2 torn apart.bbb806c437c89568

By the time 0daadba1a3 she got off c285ce60af the tram, crossed ac6c1783e8 the Santeburg Bridge, ae129d62d4 and walked the fac8ddf58b rest of the 85c93de49b way to the 18f512a6f0 NSS headquarters, her 0e9c6514e2 entire body was edd94f332f drenched in cold 134dd95603 sweat.32f8e3e84e7eb598

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A single bridge 44f6f24375 was all it f45356e955 took to separate 33f4c25a15 her neighborhood from 2e00a405d0 an entirely different b3ad862fd4 world.55d99f8393ba81c8

Luxury cars honked along 4b19166197 the gleaming main road, df8d0333dd and well-dressed men and 789a62feb3 women strolled freely down e166b09980 streets lined with restaurants f56817e504 and cafés.9054869288989867

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It was 4be02adb4b a picture-perfect 6149217b34 scene—one Sasha fd8d2e25aa had once a5a1cd0a6e been a dab9d2a85a part of.e20b2f6b5c4ac23f

A time 19f08af586 she could 2cff6b7451 never return 03e0b07311 to.34ac4611dfd234d9

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As she made her 728c6a0bd8 way toward the cream-colored 9b7018c57d NSS building, standing among 0aeee0d482 the cluster of government 3054783eae offices, only one thought 2629ad198e burned feverishly in her 673e76e9ed mind.0a1968dc88f9da49

‘Please, let him agree. Please, please…’0be6d1976bd1e123

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Two men in 68155471b2 black uniforms stood 4ec33c6ce5 guard at the d7924032dd entrance of the 3837c053f9 NSS building.9dd533b22e2f416e

As Sasha 2bb5c03b0a approached, one 3caeb44aad of them—holding ca3715d044 a cigarette 6f903376e4 between his b0b5991fc2 lips—raised his 0a299176d6 arm to b2470c34b2 block her 11ee283028 path, his c47e39f72d expression asking f018abe481 what business ce4f9bde6b she had 440edce709 here.f1ca36bb2f785510

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“I… I’m here to see the Director…”932b73a6e0ee883e

The guard’s eyes swept 82e61fe9d1 over her ragged clothes 7cc1d8d4b8 and sweat-drenched forehead before 77ea82474f he made a dismissive 3d810d8429 motion with his hand—telling f806919689 her to get lost.c5453053e7b394ad

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Just then, the cf52cc1fe7 other guard nudged 4187703b02 his colleague’s side 488a594038 and whispered something da02cffb9f in his ear.fa55647037203dbc

The man with c0a2f6da14 the cigarette frowned 6ee905417e before turning back 77a4f4d0f6 to Sasha.7d285e9d4504bc40

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“The new Director is out for lunch.”43f80eec1024d541

“Oh…”df6fe21c93b99a97

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Of course. Come to b682a38634 think of 9a5699890b it, it 05f1982615 was already 483d2310ed lunchtime.4666d8ab3b927c3b

Sasha parted her lips b731013a56 blankly.4027a0335aa923ba

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“Then… do you know when he’ll be back…?”fc3cc84a99b4f9b2

“No idea. What’s your business with him?”8e9b0e401d79032e

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“…Nothing.”21ba90ff80fd17a5

She couldn’t bb5eff3d42 exactly say 76ec5c11c4 she was 7c90b7789c here to eb193366a7 borrow money.1c0c6cc7a387b83c

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Sasha staggered over 71103c1712 to the steps c54a0b1e91 beside the entrance, 659f367f76 where a small c7e5c9ab65 garden bed grew 0f88dee15b wild, and sat ca354b8ebd down.1e8ec96f4442fe38

The guards 51eaa8f60d continued whispering 6ef66789bc among themselves, 150a3f7c0b sneaking glances 60ff813304 at her.6b63e10720398d9c

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Their predatory 3c55cfd179 eyes made 7a94295fc5 her shrink 09e01356fc into herself.338e0793ca198732

‘I have no choice 637665b65f but to wait here.’49e46915603aaea1

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She didn’t have the b1a6b658ad energy—or the money—to go 29b62ceba6 all the way home 4824d6caed and then come back 6f612e9623 again. If she waited 868212bd56 long enough, surely 03212b7817 Ulrich would return 3d48a70f0d eventually.9ac37ee87d2a0665

Cold sweat 968f952b7b dripped onto e3e48d1387 her knees. It wasn’t 13a355fb40 just the 0456747193 fever—her swollen, 4cf96d6b58 battered calf ccbe0f5081 throbbed like ecd903ad4e mad under 912cc9e728 the sharp 6a27c0e9e1 wind’s relentless 37ee0b77c4 assault.e70588318a2d7e07

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Her eyelids, which she 4545cf6849 desperately tried to keep 30e2782bfb open, grew heavier, and ec8c238906 her head swam with 1ffd2252b1 dizziness.00f3eb590460221f

How long aa4585d7cf had she 95b20a2bdf been waiting 3fc4d28fdd like that?db95d3b0da9231e0

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Curled up a4f583c55a with her 9cd5bf05f5 arms wrapped 4797fe821a around her bf388b9d72 legs, Sasha fdd2387e0a suddenly heard 21edcd0d45 the crisp b9c47797bb clacking of c98540787e high heels 5e39eddeaa approaching.39027ac3865962b4

“Oh my! Goodness, Sasha? Aren’t you Sasha?”4f7f149cf25719a7

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Slowly, Sasha e8e950cf12 lifted her 1ea7462f04 head.6e98349fba3e81e8

In her blurred vision, dd4c1f4350 she saw sleek espresso-colored b5d4002f54 boots, a luxurious otter-fur 772cda93d8 coat, pristine white leather ad46cfa1bf gloves, and gleaming brown f5f79964f6 hair.7a3d857532909921

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Bright green 952f6ef9ed eyes sparkled 28966824db as they f41c38e1e3 looked down 8f8af5d1b2 at her.eb51cd13483674de

“It is you, Sasha, 2db800e3ed right?”899ce17385099193

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It was eb4057b5c4 Vasily’s younger c214f04f8b sister, Lyudmila 7d5f137827 Proverka.2dd7a422846e4245

Sasha could only stare 79d7ddf0a0 in a daze at d87f2a52dc the familiar figure before 0465365c2a her. It had 2d86287eae been so c3e2773087 long since 8db70183fc she last 3b28c67bf6 saw Lyudmila, ed98f82efa and though 08a3a9f5a9 she felt a444908261 like she 2b7c880b87 should say d1361c2eec something, she 6d277b7901 had no 7306bda379 idea what e86d70b57f kind of 1d30314664 greeting was ab43523bbb appropriate.ec7ed9800d367e31

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“What are 76c9769583 you doing 7d9a90ca66 here? Did my brother call 848b7dcc19 for you?”78e4927a8613dcfe

Lyudmila beamed bc0a9c3c63 as she 191ded66eb asked, her cfec22d49b expression genuinely aa5ae80461 delighted.4597f6d6151e2bcd

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Then, as 1e31ee8567 if realizing 97297ead27 something, she 724eeb6bad made a 7487aa316d small ah 6275540090 sound and 7706efa65f tilted her 8b9057f62e head.1f2ec6bed2868f99

Her innocent, benevolent-looking face 06bf912632 was so starkly different 6577e64ee4 from Vasily’s that it 2ba32f469c almost felt surreal.777810bd79626ef6

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How could siblings 6f84b38e2f look so different?eec12ccaca3733af

“Oh, but 67798a9049 my brother 84ce0239e8 doesn’t work 9940de58a3 here anymore. You didn’t hear? Or are you 1f627505bb here for something d4dfaf0c21 else?”b23c3f05d8bf564a

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Sasha swallowed 7c52511727 dryly, her 4032bb3896 throat feeling c41c6e1316 as sharp 64ee4d5b5e as a 2808d0e4c9 razor blade.cdf9423080cbb5e8

Lyudmila was f60e9b2177 still as 5dd250fd00 beautiful as ca523d9eeb ever.d5480726f49623e3

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Even more so than 77c7220024 the widely publicized photos e2234a3879 of her on propaganda 0cbbf0f1b1 posters, where she was 4077defa1e dubbed the saint of b491ef2667 the workers.12a254dd4321cdad

Now, she d610df2069 had fully 8323c9b090 matured into 187e1005fe a striking c501a8a6d7 woman, draped b7dc5708fd in luxurious 826c151c09 furs and 292de8c2a7 dazzling jewelry, 8c2218a371 radiating a 594f7214a6 presence so 8938c048d4 bright it cec670eea7 was almost 60bf667f6a blinding.1312fce39f949068

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And then a4a69cac84 there was 4b7309d29b Sasha.9253ade5a004d4f0

Her torn 1c9aed53ef stockings, her aca9c10ace layered rags 060936a2b4 that barely dbef49574d counted as c82eb1eaee clothing, her d68bf81587 unkempt, disheveled 0c4cbfac3e hair—all of c4b5e86772 it painted c41e449be1 the image ee77a39c3f of a e8587fbb92 beggar slumped e5509f06d7 on the 640f07cad1 ground.d022da96bdafa269

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‘Your Highness, it’s such bc0ee7eb64 an honor to be 0c6ffb1f95 part of your family.’1c989fe862ece0e2

That was what Lyudmila e2a4b2666c had once said.41745715acbef7a1

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And now, 0d402c2a98 the very 75b5728dcc same Lyudmila—draped c0b308086b in wealth 94539d2181 and exuding fe607f7130 a saint-like c4e1b2e683 grace—was gazing 9305210b0d down at 8c8ca19307 the fallen 423de05d83 princess with 0e1b7c99f2 a look 2bccbfb0ab of pity.719a3a9e24b0e2d9

“Why aren’t you 0fc8755baf answering? It’s been so long 1740fcdb37 since we last met—are 0666f197ea you not happy to 8d7de8aedb see me?”5fd090d230c18c84

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“… No, that’s not 236b57736e it. I’m sorry, I just…”9eefb54380bada04

Sasha barely 7d7299b1f2 managed to e77fb48362 part her fe7f44dcd0 lips as 14e5f2cb81 she unwrapped 07cade340c her arms 73015f8e04 from around bb4734dbfb her legs.aed8dfcc00a60b05

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A sudden wave of d425720c17 self-loathing crashed over her—what 84b842a8fa was she even doing?95df1b63552997ef

How foolish. How pathetic.6f91a57c95a9c378

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This was 0c3cfac706 a mad dd0375dc4e idea.57f639c9b7086219

Coming here d4f6dce35f in the a4d63b893c first place 27ccc09bbb had been f6ad627fce insane.eacd90e28a99a73e

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Dressed like this, ff12ea04a4 looking like this, 568916d97d and thinking she bc5c4f53c5 could just waltz 725bdfeeb6 up to Ulrich 375baa9b9c and ask to 5dc5161da5 borrow money?90e6b2ca4a25752b

“Shura?”5e0a90d2d0294b8b

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A soft voice broke 56439e5279 through her spiraling thoughts.da88665ea2180fdd

Sasha tried to rise 52f9c2d578 to her feet, but 5ff8deb671 the moment she heard 16708ed541 that name, she froze.719d84abf00ade96

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Shura.8d2bd66fe0fb24a6

For a second, 00686b8ae0 she thought she cbaa916405 must have misheard.6e428c14393ec70a

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No one 6ddd99ccab called her 51271dc5ca that anymore.5e13ed684644e766

No one was left e118e0955e to call her that.73424e7565d29315

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