SHN Chapter 2

It was Hyun Seonwoo’s scent, the one he had smelled the few times he had tried to greet him. Half-embraced like this, his heart felt like it would explode.

“Y-yes. …Hello.”

Feeling like he might throw up, Lee Daon reflexively blurted out a greeting and immediately regretted it. He should have thanked him for catching him.

Perhaps finding it amusing that he was greeting him so calmly in this situation, Hyun Seonwoo chuckled.

“Alright.”

He let go of Lee Daon abruptly and walked forward without a second glance. His friends were waiting to go to the lecture hall together.

Staring at his familiar back, Lee Daon blankly replayed the previous moment in his mind. Being close to Hyun Seonwoo was certainly heart-fluttering, but something felt off.

The strange sensation, as if his body was being controlled, was the problem. It was odd that he had missed a step when he had finally gotten some sleep and was feeling good.

Moreover, Lee Daon had been looking directly at the stairs as he walked, habitually lowering his head.

“Ha……”

Absurdly, there was one thing that came to mind regarding this strange situation.

That hypnosis app…could it actually be real?

🍥

At first, he fiddled with the hypnosis app, thinking it must have been a coincidence.

Thinking of Hyun Seonwoo holding him as if embracing him made his cheeks flush repeatedly. He was just happy that he was able to greet him naturally.

Unable to resist the temptation, Lee Daon turned on the hypnosis app. He was curious. He wanted to see if it was real.

However, despite diligently entering strings of characters into the app for several days, the results were not good. This was because everything Lee Daon could think of was vague.

Only trivial things like greeting each other when passing by or sitting next to each other in the lecture hall.

‘Hi.’

Even before, they would exchange greetings if their eyes met directly. Although it was mostly Lee Daon unilaterally lowering his head and Hyun Seonwoo responding with a wave.

‘Hi. Is this seat taken?’

As for sitting next to each other in the lecture hall, it could just be that there were no other seats available.

Anxious, he tried entering the command about catching him when he fell, like the first time.

After doing that, his heart pounded nervously the whole time he approached Hyun Seonwoo. As a result, he actually missed a step, so he couldn’t be sure if the app was truly effective.

‘You fall often, junior.’

‘S-sorry.’

Hyun Seonwoo helped him up again, similarly to before. However, it seemed a bit strange that it happened again after only a few days.

“Hmm……”

He could just stop if he was scared, but strangely, he felt reluctant. Honestly, he had really enjoyed being able to linger near Hyun Seonwoo, even in such a trivial way, for the past few days.

If it was real, he could secure a seat next to him every time. At least a greeting once a day.

He shouldn’t be greedy, but his heart grew uncontrollably. He was even more thirsty for it because it was Hyun Seonwoo, not the antidepressants, who saved him when he was at his lowest.

Lee Daon bit his lip and moved his fingers busily.

Tomorrow, Hyun Seonwoo will have lunch with Lee Daon.

“Ha……”

He ended up acting impulsively. Regret surged as soon as the sentence was complete. He tried to delete it immediately, but the app flashed brightly, and the screen froze.

It was an effect that always appeared after completing a string of characters, but he hadn’t realized it would prevent him from deleting it right away. This must be why there was a warning message to be careful.

He tried turning the phone off and on several times and tried various other things, but the entered command didn’t change.

And so, the next day.

“Ah, junior, your name was… Daon, right? Sorry to ask so suddenly, but do you want to have lunch together?”

As soon as their morning class together ended, Hyun Seonwoo approached him and asked.

🍥

What do I do?

Intense regret overwhelmed Lee Daon again. Why did he have to write that they would have lunch together?

He should have written something like having a long conversation. Seeing as his mind was only working now that he was in a crisis, he must really need a beating to come to his senses.

He was very worried because he felt Hyun Seonwoo shouldn’t have to eat a meal with his face in front of him, a face known to ruin appetites.

Moreover, the process of going to eat together was uncomfortable in many ways. This was because Hyun Seonwoo separated from the friends he usually had lunch with in a very unnatural manner.

‘I’m eating with him today.’

‘What? No, we were going to eat out, remember?’

‘See you later.’

Just like that, Hyun Seonwoo passed by his friends without looking back, looked at Lee Daon, and kindly asked, ‘Shall we go?’

Looking at Hyun Seonwoo’s face as their eyes met, Lee Daon nodded as if mesmerized. And the whole way to the school cafeteria, cold sweat kept dripping down his back.

He suddenly came to his senses.

The hypnosis app is real.

Before he could fully process this fact, a female student who was passing by called out to him.

“Daon. Where are you going?”

She was a classmate he had met in another liberal arts class. After they exchanged names because of a team project, she would greet him first like this.

It was always both apologetic and burdensome for Lee Daon, who lacked social skills. Although he was desperately trying not to be a burden on the team project.

“Oh? Uh, I’m going to… eat. See you later.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Normally, she would try to make small talk, so Lee Daon quickly ended the conversation. Then, he stood close to Hyun Seonwoo.

Hyun Seonwoo’s lunchtime had already been taken away because of him. He became anxious, not wanting to delay him any further.

“A friend?”

“Yes. A classmate I’m doing a team project with.”

“I see…?”

He worried that his voice might tremble when answering the casually asked question. He was so happy to have a normal conversation with Hyun Seonwoo. It felt even more meaningful because it was one of the few moments like this since he started taking medication.

Finally, they arrived at the cafeteria building.

It was a little early for lunch right after the morning classes ended. Thanks to this, the cafeteria wasn’t crowded.

He absentmindedly thought it was fortunate that not too many people would see him eating with Hyun Seonwoo.

“What do you want to eat?”

“I, I’ll have the set A.”

“I’ll have the same.”

After Lee Daon chose one from the models at the entrance, Hyun Seonwoo chose the same one.

Even that small overlap was sweet, and Lee Daon clasped his hands together, fidgeting incessantly.

Then, Hyun Seonwoo naturally went to the ticket machine and tried to pay.

“I’ll! I’ll pay.”

Hurriedly approaching him, Lee Daon rummaged through his wallet.

How much did he have left? He had enough money for meals this month, so he should be able to pay.

However, before he could even take out his card, Hyun Seonwoo gently grabbed his shoulder.

“Haha. I asked you to eat, so I should pay. Besides, I can’t let my junior treat me.”

“Ah……”

The warmth that touched him was so warm and heavy.

In the end, Hyun Seonwoo paid for his meal as well. Seeing that, Lee Daon felt the blood drain from his face.

He had caused this, and now he was being treated to a meal on top of it. He couldn’t stand how pathetic he was.

“Let’s go.”

“…Okay.”

Holding their trays, they sat down in a corner. Lee Daon had consciously led him to a spot where people didn’t pass by.

Eating a meal together, facing each other like this. Lee Daon felt like this situation was a dream… and that he might get indigestion.

Still, true to his reputation for being sociable, Hyun Seonwoo kept the conversation going. Feeling like he was practically shoving the food up his nose, Lee Daon focused on diligently answering Hyun Seonwoo’s questions rather than his own meal.

After talking for a while about the class they had just taken together, the topic of conversation shifted.

“Do you have another class after this?”

“Yes. I have a long break… and then another class in the afternoon.”

“Ah, I have a long break too, so I was originally going to eat out.”

Actually, the class Hyun Seonwoo was talking about also overlapped with Lee Daon’s schedule. Every Tuesday and Thursday, he could see Hyun Seonwoo twice a day.

It was a required liberal arts class, and he was lucky. However, Hyun Seonwoo seemed completely unaware that Lee Daon was also taking that class, as the lecture hall was quite large.

Even when he first caught Lee Daon when he fell, it was on a day they had a class together.

With three overlapping classes this semester, except for Wednesdays, they had at least one class together every day. But today was the first time Hyun Seonwoo had acknowledged Lee Daon in the lecture hall.

Even that only happened after he coincidentally sat next to him because of the previous hypnosis.

“Yes.”

Anyway, without revealing anything, Lee Daon diligently nodded and responded to Hyun Seonwoo’s words. He was confident in this kind of response, having been hit on the head a lot for pretending not to listen.

After the talk about their break, the conversation suddenly stopped. He glanced at Hyun Seonwoo cautiously, but he was just calmly eating.

Only then did Lee Daon realize that he had only been answering and hadn’t asked any questions. Anxious, his toes felt like they were being cut off, and he felt short of breath.

Shoving another mouthful of plain rice into his mouth out of obligation, Lee Daon managed to come up with a topic of conversation.

It was the most difficult moment since he turned twenty.

“D-do you, s-still play basketball?”

“Huh? Ah. I do sometimes, but the court is always full.”

“I… see.”

In high school, he had seen Hyun Seonwoo playing basketball from afar several times. He looked really cool back then.

He asked out of a sense of longing, but Hyun Seonwoo responded casually. He used to play basketball quite often back then, so had he lost interest?

The pressure to say something more made his stomach churn. But since keeping his hands still would look strange, he scooped up some more plain rice and forced it into his mouth.

Then, Hyun Seonwoo, who had been eating silently, raised his head.

And, with his eyes crinkling, he smiled gently.

“You seem clumsier than you look.”

A large hand reached towards his mouth. Like a slowly replayed film reel, the surrounding air seemed to freeze. In that moment, Lee Daon also held his breath.

Removing a grain of rice from the corner of his mouth, Hyun Seonwoo smiled again. It was probably because he was making a rather foolish expression.

The skin that his fingertips brushed against was very warm.

Lee Daon was certain that he would never let go of this unrequited love.

🍥

Until the moment he parted ways with Hyun Seonwoo after finishing their meal, Lee Daon could only manage to hold onto his dazed mind.

As soon as he returned home, he curled up on the edge of his bed. His hands, hurriedly undoing his pants, were desperate.

The sensation that had been tickling him slightly as he walked home exploded as he climbed the stairs.

Yielding to the overflowing impulse, he grabbed his penis and stroked it mindlessly.

“Ah, ha…”

Since he didn’t usually enjoy masturbation, his touch was very clumsy. Despite that, his penis, already stiffly erect, leaked sticky fluid from the tip.

Hyun Seonwoo kept playing in his mind. Like a broken projector, he kept replaying the smile he had witnessed earlier.

He kept reliving the warmth that brushed against his cheek, unwilling to let go. The burning sensation and Hyun Seonwoo’s large, veiny hand.

He used to hold a basketball in that large hand. As even past memories flooded in, the strength in his waist suddenly gave way.

“Haa…!”

A heady pleasure made his back arch. Curling up further like a caterpillar, Lee Daon let out ragged breaths.

Only after he caught his breath for a while did the lingering pleasure relax his whole body.

As the strength gradually left his stiff limbs, his mind slowly began to work again.

What did I just do?

An immense sense of self-disgust scratched through him. Embarrassed by his actions, Lee Daon awkwardly straightened his waist and sat up.

His messy clothes and bed seemed to represent his current state of mind.

Am I a pervert? How could I do something like this? He even seemed to have a girlfriend.

Until now, his feelings for Hyun Seonwoo had been close to admiration. A youthful, ticklish excitement that made his heart flutter just by looking at him.

However, at this moment, what Lee Daon felt had become something more. His runaway heart had finally clung to Hyun Seonwoo, stickily.

“Ha……”

Self-deprecating laughter mixed with emptiness made his head ache. He felt like sinking to the bottom, disgusted with himself.

“……I shouldn’t do this.”

He hurried to the bathroom and washed his messy hands. Biting his lip repeatedly and pacing anxiously, Lee Daon picked up the hypnosis app from his bedside table.

And with determination, he walked to his desk and shoved it deep into a drawer.

As if he would never take it out again.

🍥

The sound of a basketball hitting the backboard echoed across the court.

In the dusky late afternoon, Lee Daon and Hyun Seonwoo were the only ones on the court.

Perhaps because his friends had all gone inside today, Hyun Seonwoo was practicing shooting alone. As soon as he saw him, Lee Daon emptied his pockets and bought a drink. He wanted to give it to him.

However, perhaps because Hyun Seonwoo looked serious, deeply absorbed in basketball, time passed like this without Lee Daon being able to speak to him.

Then, Hyun Seonwoo, who had been watching the bounced ball, turned his head abruptly.

‘I, I, that is…’

Their eyes met directly. Only then did he realize that he had been suspiciously watching him for far too long.

He ended up staring endlessly at Hyun Seonwoo’s arm extending towards the hoop and his fingertips. His gaze also lingered on the sculpted abs that were occasionally revealed when he pulled up his shirt to wipe his sweat.

He should at least greet him properly, but what should he do?

‘Did you buy that for me?’

‘Y-yes! …If you don’t mind….’

As if saving him, Hyun Seonwoo spoke first. Thanks to this, strength returned to his frozen body.

He finally extended his arm and offered the drink, but he was worried that it had become lukewarm from his body heat.

‘I’ll enjoy this.’

Nevertheless, Hyun Seonwoo accepted it without a fuss. It was the first time he had been able to repay him since he saved him from being dragged away.

‘See you later.’

Hyun Seonwoo, with a refreshing smile, ruffled Lee Daon’s hair.

This was also the day Lee Daon truly realized, while looking at him,

That what he harbored was romantic love.

🍥

The next day.

It was another day with an 8 AM class. Other classmates were happy that it was Friday and soon the weekend, but that didn’t apply to Lee Daon. Weekends were even more tiring for him because he had to work part-time.

It was also a day he had a morning class with Hyun Seonwoo. Unlike usual, his steps towards the lecture hall were very heavy.

He wished Hyun Seonwoo would recognize him in every class, but today was an exception. After yesterday’s incident, he couldn’t bear to face him.

Moreover, he felt even more guilty because he had dreamt about the sparkling memory of that day. It was as if he had defiled a memory he had cherished with all his might, so that it wouldn’t fade.

“Check the syllabus before the next class. We’ll be forming teams for the project soon.”

Fortunately, the class ended without incident.

As usual, Hyun Seonwoo paid no attention to him. Lee Daon, who had been sitting near the wall with his head lowered throughout the lecture, breathed a sigh of relief.

Something that was only in his head, something like having a meal together yesterday, would mean nothing to Hyun Seonwoo. He had overreacted.

“Daon, could you lend me a pen?”

Then, the female classmate next to him suddenly spoke to him. Tensing up habitually, Lee Daon instinctively handed over the pen he was holding.

“Oh, uh. Here, use this.”

Looking closely, it was the classmate who had acknowledged him first on Monday. He still felt tense around his peers, and a sense of anxiety settled in his back.

Still, perhaps because he had even eaten with Hyun Seonwoo yesterday, he felt a bit better today. Especially since he had initiated a conversation topic yesterday, it was a huge improvement.

At this rate, he might even be able to make friends.

“I’ll give it back to you later.”

‘Hey, I’ll give it back to you later.’

However, past memories suddenly rushed in. A sneering tone, completely different from the kind voice he just heard, pierced his heart.

Startled, Lee Daon quickly raised his head to check his classmate’s face.

“Huh? What’s wrong?”

“Uh, uh…. Nothing.”

His classmate still had a kind expression. They weren’t the same people who had bullied him relentlessly in the past.

Even though he knew that, his stomach churned. It was even worse seeing her worried expression, concerned about his sudden strange behavior.

What if she tells someone about him? Bad rumors might spread.

…Then he would be ostracized again.

“…You can keep it.”

Lee Daon managed a half-smile and spoke to his classmate.

He had long learned from experience that being seen as a pushover was better than being seen as a smelly beggar.

At that moment, he heard a familiar voice from behind.

“We’re in this class together too.”