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PS | Chapter 2.4
by RAEJehyuk sneaked a glance at Sihoo. Standing under the cherry blossoms, Yoon Sihoo looked as if he had belonged there since the beginning.
“We’ve still got a long way to go.”
At that moment, Sihoo spoke calmly.
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Jehyuk, who had been secretly stealing glances at him, flinched in surprise and turned his gaze to Sihoo, feeling as if he had been caught. Embarrassed, he quickly opened his mouth.
“We’re almost there. Sorry.”
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He felt bad that Sihoo had come all the way up here just to help him practice. But Sihoo shook his head.
“That’s not what I meant.”
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“Then what?”
“It’s just that… I think it’ll take at least a month before you can hold hands naturally.”
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Oh. He was talking about physical affection.
Hearing such a precise timeframe, embarrassment surged inside him. But at the same time, a strange sense of relief washed over him. They were still holding hands. Sihoo wasn’t showing any sign of discomfort. Maybe he was just tolerating it, but at least he hadn’t reacted negatively—so for now, Jehyuk could breathe a little easier.
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He bit the inside of his cheek and mulled over Sihoo’s words. He couldn’t exactly deny them. This was their first practice session, so maybe that was why it felt like nothing would change. Trying not to let doubt creep in, he finally managed to respond.
“Well… being cautious is a good thing.”
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Sihoo chuckled at the lame excuse and followed up with a playful question.
“Then, what about a kiss? Would that take a year?”
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……?
Jehyuk’s steps came to an abrupt halt. He blinked, wondering if he had misheard, then slowly, his face turned red.
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A kiss… as in…
His brain short-circuited. It wasn’t like Sihoo was saying they should kiss—he was just making a hypothetical comment. And yet, Jehyuk’s heart suddenly pounded wildly. His whole body felt hot. Frozen in place, he couldn’t figure out where to look, his mouth opening and closing uselessly.
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Sihoo, watching him, let out a quiet laugh. The deep, resonant sound sent a shiver down Jehyuk’s spine.
“Looking at you, I’d say it’d take even longer than that.”
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Damn it, Ji Jehyuk. Get a grip.
He scolded himself and forced his voice out.
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“Do we even have to kiss? What if the other person doesn’t want to?”
“Hmm.”
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Sihoo gave their joined hands a slight tug.
Jehyuk, who had been standing still in shock, was caught completely off guard and stumbled forward. He barely managed to brace himself, planting his feet firmly to stop from falling. But in the process, his hand pressed against Sihoo’s chest.
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The sensation beneath his palm was all too vivid.
Despite his smooth, delicate-looking exterior, Sihoo’s body was firm with muscle. He was even more solid than Jehyuk, who had built his body through years of training. The unexpected contrast threw Jehyuk off. His palm burned at the unfamiliar touch.
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“When you like someone, you want to.”
The sentence was left open-ended, missing a subject.
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Jehyuk instinctively lifted his gaze.
Their eyes met.
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It wasn’t often that he got a clear look into Sihoo’s deep brown irises, but now they were staring straight at him, unwavering.
“Holding hands, touching….”
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The world around them fell silent. It was as if all other sounds had vanished, leaving only Sihoo’s voice ringing in the still air.
“And kissing, too.”
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A quiet, thick with something unspoken, settled between them.
And in reality, there was no one else here but the two of them.
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Under the bright sunlight, Jehyuk found himself unable to look away from Sihoo’s face. He should say something, anything to break the tension, but his body refused to move. The word kiss echoed in his head.
It’s not like I’ve never thought about it.
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It was a word he’d heard countless times. Kissing was a staple in movies and dramas. Even among his classmates, they had played all sorts of drinking games last year with a kiss as the penalty. Jehyuk had left before it got awkward, but he wasn’t ignorant of the concept.
Still, to him, a kiss had always seemed like a dirty act.
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He never understood why people liked pressing their lips together so much. Even when he dated, he’d felt the same. Saliva was disgusting. The idea of exchanging it had never seemed thrilling or romantic to him.
Even now, his thoughts hadn’t changed.
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And yet…
For some reason, just a little bit—no, the tiniest bit—he thought he might be starting to understand.
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He didn’t know why.
But looking at Sihoo up close like this made him feel something.
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For the first time, the thought of lips meeting didn’t seem gross.
The curve of Sihoo’s nose cast a soft shadow over his lips. They were a perfect shape—not too thick, not too thin. A natural shade of pink. But under the sunlight, they seemed to have a deeper, rosier hue.
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Jehyuk knew, logically, that human lips didn’t taste sweet. That was just common sense.
But for some insane reason, he found himself thinking—what if Sihoo’s did?
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“Jehyuk-ah.”
“Huh?”
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Sihoo’s voice pulled him back to reality.
Jehyuk blinked rapidly, realizing he had been staring at Sihoo’s lips.
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And worse—Sihoo was right there, so close that their lips were nearly touching.
“Is there something on my lips?”
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Underneath those sharp, dark brown eyebrows, Sihoo’s eyes curved into a grin. The smooth arc of his gaze made it feel as though he was reading Jehyuk like an open book.
As soon as Sihoo spoke, Jehyuk’s heart dropped. It felt like his thoughts had been exposed, leaving behind an unexplainable embarrassment that washed over him.
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His frozen body refused to move. Never before had his mind and body been so disconnected. He knew—if he just turned his head away, if he just said anything, this suffocating tension would disappear.
“Or maybe…”
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Sihoo tilted his head slightly.
Since he was taller than Jehyuk, this angle made it easy—convenient, even—for him to close the distance between their lips. His whisper tickled Jehyuk’s ear, soft as the cherry blossoms drifting down behind him.
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“Were you thinking of something else?”
Now was the time to say something. To shake his head, to react in any way. The urgency hit him like a wave, and Jehyuk finally managed to squeeze out a response.
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“N-no, nothing like that.”
His voice came out rough and low, forced and unconvincing. A poorly crafted lie, obvious to anyone. Sihoo quietly observed him, the corners of his mouth hinting at amusement.
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A breath—soft and warm—brushed over Jehyuk’s lips. Lighter than the spring breeze.
“You were staring so hard, I wondered.”
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A scent lingered in the air between them. It was so sweet, so distinctly Sihoo, that it made Jehyuk curious—almost as if he could taste it. His entire vision was filled with nothing but Yoon Sihoo.
He just stood there, watching as Sihoo leaned in closer.
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Almost as if… he was waiting for something.
“Are you curious?”
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Even though the sentence was incomplete, Jehyuk knew exactly what he meant.
He was supposed to say no.
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Of course, he was supposed to say no.
But his lips wouldn’t move.
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Something was wrong. Something had been changing since yesterday. He didn’t know what, but something inside him was shifting.
The silence stretched. And silence, in itself, was an unspoken permission.
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Sihoo seemed to have waited long enough. He moved.
His broad frame leaned in entirely, closing the distance between them. A breeze swept past, carrying the scent of fresh leaves, branches, tender buds shedding their skins, and the fluttering petals of cherry blossoms. The mix of it all filled Jehyuk’s lungs.
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It felt like time had stopped.
Trapped in this moment, Jehyuk forgot how to breathe. He could only stare, wide-eyed, as Sihoo’s face drew closer. He saw the slow flutter of dark eyelashes, felt the brush of a perfectly sculpted nose against his cheek.
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And then—
Their lips met. It was light, delicate. Like a piece of cotton candy melting on his lips.
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Like the touch of a falling petal.
No, it was…
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Impossible to describe.
No past experience could explain it.
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It was unbelievably soft.
And warm.
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Without realizing it, Jehyuk clenched his fists and held his breath.
Sihoo pulled away, and only then did Jehyuk gasp, releasing the air he hadn’t even known he was holding.
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A moment that had felt like infinity had, in reality, lasted no more than a few seconds.
So that means… right now… “Breathe, Jehyuk-ah.”
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Sihoo had just—
No, they had—
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“Hyuk-ah.” A large hand gently cradled the back of Jehyuk’s head.
The other wrapped around his back, pulling him into a warm embrace. Jehyuk didn’t even have the mental capacity to refuse. If anything, it was a relief.
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With his face buried against Sihoo’s chest, at least he wouldn’t have to show whatever expression he was making. Finally, he exhaled, drawing in deep, shaky breaths.
Sihoo’s hand moved soothingly over his back.
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“Sorry. I didn’t think you’d react this much.” His voice was calm, genuinely apologetic.
Reality slowly pieced itself together.
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And Jehyuk—at last—registered what had just happened.
For the first time in his life, he had kissed someone.
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He blinked. His eyes felt dry, as if all thoughts had been drained from his head.
“Did you hate it that much?” Sihoo’s voice reached him again, gentle yet cautious.
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“I thought you were fine holding hands, so I figured… something small like a peck would be okay. Sorry, Hyuk-ah.”
Jehyuk, still lightheaded, caught onto one particular word.
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A peck?
That word—its innocent, almost playful tone—felt even stranger to him than kiss did.
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Still too embarrassed to lift his head, he mumbled against Sihoo’s chest.
“…It wasn’t a kiss?” His voice was thick with confusion.
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Sihoo’s hand stilled for a moment. Then, he burst into laughter. It was a genuine laugh, full of amusement.
And damn it, even that sounded good.
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For a split second, Jehyuk wondered—how the hell was someone like this even real?
“Mm, nope. Not a kiss.” Sihoo murmured, his voice low as he rubbed soothing circles on Jehyuk’s shoulder.
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Embarrassment gave way to sheer bewilderment.
Jehyuk pulled away, lifting his head with a sharp motion, his face openly displaying his confusion.
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“But it touched my lips.” He didn’t even bother to hide it.
So, in Jehyuk’s mind, a peck was something you did on a place that wasn’t the lips. When lips met lips, that was a kiss.
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Which meant… just now, Yoon Sihoo had become Ji Jehyuk’s first kiss.
“This doesn’t really count as a kiss. Besides, Hyuk-ah, your first kiss should be with someone else, not me. This was just practice, after all.”
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His heart, which had been pounding like crazy before their lips even met, gradually slowed at those words.
“…Someone else?”
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He felt like he kind of understood why Sihoo was saying this… or maybe he didn’t. His mind had turned to stone, and he struggled to get it moving again. If he traced back how they even got to this point—no, why they ended up kissing in the first place…
“Oh, right. Someone you actually like and will date in the future. Not just any relationship like the ones you’ve had before, but a real one.”
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That’s right. They were just practicing. He finally understood, but it didn’t quite sink in. He was still confused. Why was this any different? What exactly was the distinction?
“Then… a peck is fine?”
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The more serious Jehyuk’s expression became, the wider Sihoo’s smile grew.
“People give pecks to just anyone. Even kids in kindergarten do it.”
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Jehyuk had lived a life far from normal, so of course, Sihoo was probably right. But the problem was, Jehyuk had never even done that before. Not until today.