PEN Vol 4 Ch. 18

On the morning of December 29th, Cheon Sejoo had a long conversation with Shin Gyoyeon about what would happen after Kang Junmyeon returned to Korea.

Several strategies were discussed, but since Shin Gyoyeon wanted to interrogate him personally, Cheon Sejoo and the disposal team planned to kidnap him as soon as he returned home on January 4th.

He was a long-time member of the organization and had established his own power base, so considerable resistance was expected. Therefore, Cheon Sejoo reviewed the plan several times with Shin Gyoyeon and Chae Beomjun before leaving the CEO’s office.

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It was then, as he took out his phone to check it, having previously set it to silent, that a call came in from Kim Sunhee, Kim Hyunkyung’s caregiver. Seeing the numerous missed calls along with her name, Cheon Sejoo instinctively knew that Kim Hyun Kyung had passed away.

“…Hello.”

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Cheon Sejoo pressed the answer button and forced out his voice. The caregiver responded in a low voice.

-Ah, Mr. Cheon. I thought I should call you…

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“…I’ll be right there.”

No further words were needed. Cheon Sejoo said this and got on the elevator. He wiped his face with his dry palm. His throat tightened. It was hard to breathe. Despite this, he showed no outward sign of distress and went down to the basement to find the car he used for work.

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“Did your discussion go well?”

Sunhyuk, who was waiting in the driver’s seat, looked back at Cheon Sejoo and asked. They were supposed to go and review the plan. They needed to double-check the route from the airport to the workshop and prepare escape routes in case of unforeseen circumstances.

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But at this moment, he couldn’t leave Sejin alone. His mind was filled with thoughts of Sejin crying. Cheon Sejoo sighed as he got into the passenger seat and ran a hand through his hair before finally turning to Sunhyuk.

It wasn’t pleasant to have to disappoint Sunhyuk, who looked at him with such unwavering trust, but he had no choice.

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“Sunhyuk.”

“Yes, Manager.”

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“Can you go alone?”

At his sudden question, Moon Sunhyuk, who was about to start the car and leave, raised an eyebrow. Then, glancing at Cheon Sejoo, he nodded and asked,

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“Yes. I can. Leave it to me. Did the president give you another task?”

Until now, Cheon Sejoo had always been in charge of checking the preparations before carrying out a job.

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He had been bringing Moon Sunhyuk along for the past year, but, following Seok Yoonhyung’s advice that it was best to keep important plans known to as few people as possible, Cheon Sejoo had always checked the most crucial elements himself.

It was rather pleasing that Cheon Sejoo was entrusting him with this task. Moon Sunhyuk, suppressing a smile on his face, asked him. However, the answer he received was different from what he had expected.

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“No, I think I need to go to a funeral home.”

“…….”

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Moon Sunhyuk’s left eyebrow, unseen by Cheon Sejoo, twitched slightly. He was one of the few people who knew that Kim Hyunkyung was on her deathbed. He was also the only one who knew that Cheon Sejoo was covering her medical expenses for Sejin’s sake.

This wasn’t like Cheon Sejoo. Ever since meeting Kwon Sejin, Cheon Sejoo had been showing sides of himself that Moon Sunhyuk hadn’t known. He didn’t like it, but Moon Sunhyuk remained silent.

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He figured it wouldn’t last much longer, as Cheon Sejoo had said he would send the kid away when he became an adult. The New Year was two days away, and then Kwon Sejin would be twenty.

Once Kwon Sejin left, Cheon Sejoo would stop acting so out of character.

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“I’ll take care of everything thoroughly. Don’t worry and go ahead.”

“…Thank you.”

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Cheon Sejoo, staring intently at Sunhyuk, suddenly smiled faintly and said so. He reached out and ruffled Sunhyuk’s hair, which was a handspan taller than his own, before folding his arms. He closed his eyes and took a brief moment of rest in silence.

Sunhyuk dropped Cheon Sejoo off at his apartment. Cheon Sejoo went up to his home, put on a suit, and took out his ironing board.

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He could have rented a black suit for mourning at the funeral home, but he thought they wouldn’t have one of Sejin’s size, so he ironed and packed his own suit jacket and pants.

While he was driving to the hospital, he received a call from the caregiver. She said she was cleaning up the hospital room and heading down to the funeral home. He got the location of the funeral hall from her and hung up.

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When he parked in the parking lot of the funeral home attached to the hospital and got out, sleet was falling from the ash-gray sky.

It was better than rain, but the damp, heavy air reminded him of that day. Cheon Sejoo ignored the sound of sirens ringing in his ears and walked on.

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Room 3. 

Kim Hyunkyung and Sejin’s names were displayed on the panel in front of the funeral hall. The single Hanja character¹ preceding Kim Hyunkyung’s name felt strange. Just two days ago, she had held his hand and talked with him, and now she was gone from this world. Cheon Sejoo, his face devoid of expression, walked toward the funeral hall where muted sounds of mourning drifted.

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He had asked Kim Sunhee, Hyunkyung’s caregiver, to stay until the funeral ended, and she was now organizing the newly arrived food with the funeral assistants. As she transferred side dishes to plates and covered them with plastic wrap, she noticed Cheon Sejoo and greeted him.

“Mr. Cheon, you’re here?”

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“Yes. You’ve worked hard. Where’s Sejin?”

“He’s… in the inner room. It’s just that…”

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Kim Sunhee trailed off, her eyebrows furrowing. Sejoo could easily picture Sejin’s state without having to see him. He knew that no words of comfort would be of any use, but he couldn’t leave the funeral hall empty like this, so he told Sunhee to prepare only a small amount of food and headed towards the inner room.

Seeing the empty head mourner’s seat, Cheon Sejoo took off his shoes and stepped onto the wooden floor. The funeral hall, where the flower arrangements had just been completed, was empty.

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There was no incense burning in the censer, nor were there chrysanthemums placed on the altar. A picture of Kim Hyunkyung, the one Sejoo vaguely recalled seeing on Sejin’s phone once, was placed where the portrait should be. In the picture, she was smiling brightly.

Cheon Sejoo gazed at her for a moment, then bowed twice before rising. He lit the first incense stick, placed a chrysanthemum, then picked up the suitcase he had leaned against the wall and opened the door to the family room inside the funeral hall.

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The light was off. A thin beam of light from the funeral hall illuminated a figure huddled against the wall. Sejin was sitting with his knees drawn up like a child, his head leaning against the wall, weeping silently. The tears streaming down his cheeks felt like they were constricting around Cheon Sejoo’s throat. Fighting the suffocating grief, Sejoo forced himself to move.

“Why are you here like this?”

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“……”

Sejin looked up at him without blinking, his reddened, swollen eyes were soaked with tears. The hastily put-on suit he wore was too much short for him, leaving his wrists and ankles exposed. Seeing his clothes, Cheon Sejoo placed the suitcase he had brought beside him. Sejin’s expression contorted in pain. He slowly opened his mouth.

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“You… why are you here?”

Cheon Sejoo didn’t respond to the barbed question. Sejin asked him again, continuing to sob quietly.

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“It’s nothing important to you, why did you come all the way here…?”

“…….”

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Cheon Sejoo realized how deeply their argument from two days ago had wounded Sejin. Though his heart ached, he forced himself to ignore the words, painfully swallowing down his rising emotion. Only after several attempts did he manage to speak in a calm voice, addressing Sejin.

“Get up. You have to see your mother off.”

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Sejin shook his head. Tears welled up and spilled down his cheeks with each blink. Pretending not to notice Sejin’s sorrow soaking into the floor, Cheon Sejoo grabbed his arm and pulled him up. His unsteady body felt light.

“Kwon Sejin. You’re the only one who can take this place. Don’t leave your mother alone.”

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At Cheon Sejoo’s firm admonishment, Sejin finally let out a shaky breath. Without even attempting to wipe away the tears streaming down his face uncontrollably, Sejin leaned his forehead against Cheon Sejoo’s shoulder. His breath, heavy with sorrow, dampened Sejoo’s neck.

“I don’t want to go out there….”

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“You have to.”

“I don’t want to….”

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The sorrowful voice choked Sejoo. Unable to bear it any longer, Cheon Sejoo wrapped his arms around Sejin’s back. Sejin had lost weight during the two months his mother had been in the intensive care unit. As he placed his hand on Sejin’s back, feeling no trace of fat, his fingers brushed against his protruding spine. Cheon Sejoo held the pitiful Sejin tighter, pressing his lips against his bowed head.

“Sejin-ah, Sejin-ah….”

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His gentle voice soothed Sejin. He softly comforted Sejin, who was struggling to burrow into his embrace and shedding tears. 

Cry if you want to. But eventually, you have to go out there. You have to take your place. 

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At Cheon Sejoo’s soothing words, Sejin finally let out his pent-up sorrow in a long time.

“Why did my mom have to die?”

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His tear-soaked voice was filled with resentment. It felt wrong. Someone else should have died, so why did someone as kind and innocent as his mother have to suffer so much and leave this world? Sejin couldn’t understand it at all.

“What did we do wrong…?”

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