MS Ch 6 part 1

Click, click, click.

She blankly flipped through the channels.

A variety of sounds burst out of the TV as the channels flew through the screen. The raucous laughter of a variety show, the flashy music of a music program, the lively comments of a home shopping channel. Despite all the noise, none of it registered to Euncho as she sat dazedly in front of the TV. In fact, the TV didn’t even seem to enter her eyes.

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‘Did you meet that person?’

‘……’

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‘Did that person speak to you? What did he say?’

She placed the remote down and stroked her shoulder. She felt strange. She felt as if Heejin-unnie’s hand was still stuck to her shoulder.

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Euncho let out another one of the countless sighs she’d made today and picked up the remote once again.

Click, click. She was now back at Channel 1 and began to flip through the channels again.

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She wasn’t trying to find anything particular to watch. She was just doing it to keep the raging thoughts at bay.

A commercial had ended just in time, and a film began to play. Ah, it’s that movie. It was the hotel movie that Euncho watched whenever it aired. She placed the remote down and hugged her knees to her chest.

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‘Euncho, don’t get mixed up with that person. He is a really dangerous man.’

However, the movie didn’t seem to register today.

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The area where her chest touched her knees felt damp. Euncho drew circles on her belly the same way she’d done to her shoulder. There was nothing there, but… Her heart kept sinking. It felt as if the monsoon that had passed was now wreaking havoc in her brain.

‘Euncho, please…’

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Has Heejin-unnie ever cried in front of me before?

The sudden question floated inside her head. The answer came to her quickly. No. Never. Although she had laughed in front of her many times, she had never shed a tear in front of Euncho. In fact, whenever she was in front of Euncho, she’d do whatever she could to hide the shadows and gloominess of her life from her. As if she truly believed what she had always said to Euncho. That Euncho was at an age when she should only see and hear good things.

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That same unnie had wept so miserably. Until the front of Euncho’s T-shirt had become drenched.

Euncho didn’t know what to do and gently patted Heejin-unnie’s back. Because there was nothing else she could do.

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What kind of relationship do they have for her to act this way?

What kind of relationship does she have with Ki Taeju?

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What did Ki Taeju do to Unnie?

That person… What did that person do to Unnie…

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The words that were stuck inside her throat did not come out. She kept feeling afraid. Afraid that the assumptions she had been pushing back as she rolled around with Ki Taeju would be true. Afraid that the two of them had a much deeper relationship than she’d thought.

Even though she knew she was being stupid…

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She laid Heejin down after she had fallen asleep from crying. She placed a thin pillow underneath her head and covered her with a thin blanket. Euncho couldn’t leave her unnie’s side for a long time. Her eyes kept being drawn to Heejin’s red, swollen eyes.

She stayed by her side until it was almost time for her mother to return home. Before leaving Unit 203, Euncho left behind a note. She told Heejin to make sure to eat her meals and that they should talk again soon.

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There was no point in avoiding this any longer.

Euncho realized this as she exited Heejin-unnie’s apartment.

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It was a strange and ambiguous relationship from the very beginning, and it had continued even after Euncho, a complete outsider, had gotten involved. It was as if each of them were covering their true feelings behind a thin layer of film. If it were left alone, it would only fester before exploding altogether.

Isn’t that what she’d seen with Heejin-unnie? She had endured and endured until it finally burst open…

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Euncho raised her head.

The uniform she had picked up yesterday was hanging on the wall. Her fall uniform was hanging next to her summer uniform. As if to let her know that autumn would always come after summer, it was very clear.

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That’s why she felt even more distant. Once the summer was over, she felt like the ice floor underneath the three of them would crack.

As if they were trapped within an illusion created by the blistering summer.

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Boom, boom.

Suddenly, she heard someone banging on the front door.

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Euncho’s shoulders flinched. The uninvited guest who had been visiting all summer. Even though she should be used to this by now, she was oddly startled by the arrival.

‘He is a really dangerous man.’

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Was it because of those words?

He was someone who had never been a threat to Euncho. At first, they had only gotten involved due to sexual curiosity, but as time went on, it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that she had melted into the affection he showed her.

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But Heejin-unnie told her to stay away from him because he was dangerous. She told her to ignore him if he spoke to her and to pretend she didn’t know him when they ran into each other.

Euncho moistened her dry lips and quietly walked to the door to unlock it. As expected, Ki Taeju walked inside with ease. He moved to take his dress shoes off when he raised a brow. This was because Euncho had raised both hands and gestured for him to stop.

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“Why?”

He asked calmly. His question caused her to choke up. In the beginning, their relationship had started through Heejin-unnie, but at some point, she slipped out and disappeared.

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Because of this, Euncho had forgotten how this had all begun. But now, she needed to bring it back, and it was making her heart ache.

“What kind of relationship do you have with Heejin-unnie?”

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Ki Taeju’s puzzled eyes as they gazed at Euncho suddenly changed. He had recognized the emotion brewing on her face, but now it was as if everything had been sucked away, leaving only a calm stillness. His reaction caused a shiver to run down Euncho’s spine, filling her with dread.

“You say you’re not her boyfriend.”

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“……”

“But you still had sex.”

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“……”

“It doesn’t seem like you’re having an affair with Unnie because you don’t seem to… love her.”

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When she put it all together, it came out like this.

It couldn’t be described with one word, so she continued to ramble.

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“I wonder what made you so curious about this all of a sudden.”

Ki Taeju leaned his large body against the wall. Unlike Euncho’s frayed nerves, he seemed rather calm, almost as if he had expected this to happen at some point.

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He slightly drew in his chin as his black eyes grew cold.

“Did Yu Heejin say something?”

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His animalistic eyes shrewdly gazed at Euncho as he asked the question. Then he began to chuckle as he tilted his head.

“There’s no way she’d tell you.”

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He was right.

Heejin hadn’t told Euncho anything of substance.

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She only told Euncho that Ki Taeju was dangerous and not to get mixed up with him.

Only pleas and warnings. She didn’t say what kind of relationship they had or what he had done to her to make her so afraid of him, scorn him, reproach him. She hadn’t said a word. Euncho hadn’t been in any place to ask her to explain as she held her weeping body.

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Therefore, there was only one way left for Euncho. Not Unnie but the other person. She had to ask Ki Taeju.

“That’s why I’m asking you!”

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“……”

“Heejin-unnie told me not to get mixed up with you.”

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Ki Taeju frowned imperceptibly. Euncho, who was looking at the floor, didn’t notice.

“She said you were a dangerous man…”

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“So?”

“……”

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“Is that what you want?”

It was a fleeting reaction, so by the time Euncho raised her head to look at him, his face was sleek and calm.

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“Then tell me. I’ll leave you alone.”

Ba-dump. A corner of her heart twisted.

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Suddenly, she couldn’t breathe. It was the result of Ki Taeju’s indifference. It was strange and unfamiliar, so it pained her. Why? When they had met before, he had hugged her so tightly that she felt like she was going to melt. Why was he being so cold now that Heejin-unnie was being brought up?

Euncho clenched her fists. A corner of her heart that had been ripped to shreds was beginning to stir.

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“Heejin-unnie… is one of the few people who are precious to me. Even though we don’t have a single drop of blood in common, she’s someone I consider family.”

“……”

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“I don’t want to grow distant from her.”

“……”

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“But the more time I spend with you, the more difficult it becomes.”

Euncho crossed the imaginary line she hadn’t crossed until now and walked to the door with her bare feet. She grabbed the hem of his clothes.

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“Are we going to keep up this ambiguous relationship?”

Don’t be so cold. Don’t act like you’re going to cut me off. She looked up at him, hoping he could sense her desperation.

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As she drew near, he stared at Euncho through the hazy darkness. The air grew tense, and her mouth went dry. Euncho gulped. Ki Taeju’s large hand rose and slowly rubbed Euncho’s cheek.

“I don’t plan on ending things with Yu Heejin.”

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Someone once said that words have power. At this moment, Euncho realized the truth of this saying. She felt like her heart was being crushed by the voice of another.

No, it wasn’t the power of the voice. It was the implication behind it.

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“So you should be the one to decide.”

Ki Taeju’s finger continued to affectionately stroke Euncho’s cheek. Euncho felt conflicted. She wanted to smack his hand away, but she also wanted to grab onto it so that he couldn’t leave.

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“Whether you end things with me or with Yu Heejin. Decide.”

“…And if I say I’ll end things with you?”

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“It can’t be helped.”

Again. He was doing it again.

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His lukewarm attitude created a long scar on Euncho’s heart.

Why couldn’t it be helped? What did the time we spent together mean to you? Why don’t you feel any regret? Why didn’t you even flinch when I said I might end things with you?

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Euncho began to glare at him with hatred in her eyes. Her heart felt cold and hot at the same time. This was the first time she was experiencing something like this, and she was swept away by the unfamiliarity of it all.

She tried to hold it back, but the lump of sorrow began to surge up from deep within. Even at this moment, Euncho felt like she was an idiot for being unable to push his hand away.

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It was because she remembered what it felt like for those hands to wrap around her. The hands that had soothed her into a sweet sleep in the suffocating summer. She remembered it so clearly, so how could she push it away?

“This time, instead of just looking like you’re going to cry, are you really going to cry?”

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The fingers that had been stroking her cheek grabbed her chin.

Ki Taeju bent down and stared at Euncho’s face. As Euncho’s eyes began to glisten with tears, the man’s eyes grew cloudy. Euncho bit her bottom lip and moved to slap his hand away, but Ki Taeju was one step ahead of her.

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He pulled her hips and kissed her. Euncho’s eyes widened as tears trickled down. She tried to move away, but Ki Taeju didn’t seem like he was going to let her go. He stuck her closer to his body and pushed his tongue inside her mouth.

The kiss was just like him, so her eyes began to grow hot with more tears. It felt like he was trying to console her through the kiss.

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She tried to close her mouth, but he had already thrust half of his tongue inside. Euncho’s tongue was quivering, just like her, and Ki Taeju began to suck it as he stroked the back of her waist. It felt like his hands were patting her. Like they had in the middle of the night as he tried to lull her back to sleep.

Her pursed lips parted as she slowly melted into him.

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Ki Taeju pushed her to the wall and began to kiss her in full force. The kiss sucked her in completely like a carnal caress. His finger quietly approached her face and wiped away the tears that began to trickle down. Just that simple action made her heart waver. It was already wavering, but now even more, more, more…

‘Euncho, please…’

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Her eyes burst open.

Euncho frantically turned her face away. The kiss had been so intense that a string of saliva formed between their lips as she pulled away.

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“No. I-I don’t think this is right.”

Euncho rubbed her lips with the back of her hand. Yes, this wasn’t right at all. She knew full well that avoiding this was useless, but she was still doing something like this. I must really be an idiot. The tears that had gathered in her eyes began to fall as she moved her head. They trickled down her cheeks.

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She heard him click his tongue.

As soon as she looked up at him, his large hands stretched out towards her and wrapped around her cheeks. He wiped her cheeks as if he were cleaning a young child’s face. His eyes did not look that much different from when they were having sex.

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It made her feel really sad. In some ways, it was the same as it had been in the past, but from a different angle, he also seemed like a total stranger.

Euncho made up her mind and pushed Ki Taeju’s chest. As his hands fell away, regret took its place. And with it, a painful ache. But her outstretched palms did not waver as they pushed Ki Taeju away.

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They pushed and pushed until he was outside the door.

“End things with Unnie.”

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“……”

“That’s all I can say.”

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Her hand trembled as it held the doorknob.

“Don’t come here until you’ve ended things with Heejin-unnie.”

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She tried to make her voice sound strong, but it held a hint of a tremor. But Euncho still gathered her courage and stood firm. This was a strange relationship, and the strange summer that had kept it going had come to an end. Therefore, it was time to escape this strange swamp.

Euncho let out a ragged breath and mustered up the courage to look into his eyes which she had been avoiding all this time. Slowly, ever so slowly, her eyes looked up.

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“Until then…”

“……”

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“I-I won’t see you.”

When Ki Taeju’s eyes met hers, she spoke in a firm voice. Afraid that she would waver, Euncho quickly closed the door. Bang, the sound split through the air. She thought she heard Ki Taeju’s baffled laugh. It soon disappeared in a haze as if it had been an illusion all along…

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