MM Ch 10
by AnonAnemoneDue to the cold 333e15ae85 wind, no one was 2f16f53bab sitting at the outdoor 23598c3d13 patio tables. I recalled the last 82448c1a8a time I came here 46c9390524 with Lee Kyuwol, and 29696ff3b8 I brought the cup a6b8d9bbc9 of coffee up to f22c299364 my lips.0d1cd2bb71f371e4
“…Aren’t you cold?”c80c04d3fe2e992a
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Lee Kyuwol slowly bef3ceaeaa rubbed my hand e59955de79 underneath the blanket. A muffler was 48f85eb297 wrapped around my f0cf68ff84 face. I turned and looked 72279eb19a at him.a73cc958a39a27d5
“I’m not cold. I’m fine. It feels nice to e0292ba2ad enjoy the fresh air.”18c8ae76b4db4b38
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After we had fallen f8b32202b7 into the lake, Lee e33c7ba580 Kyuwol and I caught 4fe626a02d a severe cold. It was actually 8ea2505e17 for the better 19de31f5b9 that the both f4eeea2490 of us had 36e3d1348e gotten sick. Whether it was 3e9d8588b8 after we ate 20e981b0c3 or after we 5db9327c8a took our medicine, c2d013c098 Lee Kyuwol and d5ff6988a2 I kissed and 98db6544b7 tangled our feverish 5030c42c8f bodies.f910ca2e9a495931
“About Kim YoungHoon. He came 25964ef543 to see 03d8b7d2ca me at 311a86668a my school 09042fe303 a month 0551cc6f33 ago.”2ef93de6d6dc0444
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“Really?”58f25d7d19d077d9
Lee Kyuwol’s eyes did 80e3f4d859 not seem agitated in e7c9274230 any way as he 46916d9f6d gazed at me. It wasn’t a2be7781e3 completely unexpected. Because Lee Kyuwol 8bc25ca5a8 knew more about dbb253b168 me than I 73033e5b19 could imagine. I looked at fe2ebe6cbc him and began 56a7bdce78 to talk about 4a8cef67d8 what I wanted 6d18e23905 to say.d5f27ab645152442
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“It seems 94b1fe0db0 that he’s 7f82703ce7 decided to db46f19c27 abandon his f277a1e23b suspicions about 187a6f314e doping. He knows 83602beae7 that the 83de42164c tests are 24483b6d5a done randomly, 07bbe558a0 but he 6bbf6793d2 thinks that d13ad16d71 the reason eb16609c94 why you’re 03aca3266f often left 4488a662a4 out is 36384438af because of 2c26973454 your background. As you know, f6f7e01dab your family is b4862220e2 a bit…”ffd3e22dcebc3b53
“They’re convenient. When I need 1a9fd00d17 them.”d591ad417bae6987
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As I tried 450848f6df to carefully pick 7f5f444525 my words, Lee 0758745ce3 Kyuwol bluntly answered 6f0464ef82 for me. The words he chose 2fa5c7f214 were simple and without 43e5a64521 any good or bad 423dafd254 connotations. I wondered 2dcbf06b5d if this fc05adfda4 was what f889b9ff6a caused people bf50720184 around him 8b9a4c6865 to be fc36ec2e13 drawn to 78264ab2de him. Then I began to 7794c30376 quietly explain my meeting 0a9eabfbf7 with Sports Korea’s Kim 6c295fce53 YoungHoon.743ffb80a72c8043
bfa4f18faf00bee7
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“His grandfather 0688307345 is a aba7524fc5 prominent figure ab47e131ab in his d36f403063 region, and 796efb1bb4 his older e874000b47 uncle is 12494d20e4 a national 038c414904 congressman. His younger uncle 3634d89265 used to be b34747e5db a judge and 2c3fc200af is now a 1942cff5b1 partner at a 6f21d299a9 major law firm. His late 7c2f0bb3fd father used 9c566a6dc7 to be 836e64b71a a professor 5200075776 that was 982e77720f respected in a71fbdfa70 foreign universities. With a 8d9800046d background like e4633adfd6 this, I 71f83c2240 think he’d 6b8bded2ea be able 2c87e65a6d to hide f80a374a22 any kind e96aa50201 of scandal be1ae19afa regardless of 707ed9efab whether it’s b8c382eb64 about doping b9b95e3dea or not… b4005e3485 Right before 738215018c the season ced045b77c was over, af352d5cb7 Lee Kyuwol 77ed63db8e decided to 3b303f1374 do an 92c9577eb5 official extensive 10eee2af50 physical examination. Right after I 15df22f826 put my reputation 325c9c543b on the line.”2900d4ec02833eec
9025660b98bab159
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The reporter 2ae5a80c0b had pretended 2e9e7984d2 to catch 88d613bf85 Lee Kyuwol 4145b4b454 out in 64105d731f public by cc8ba71c52 accident, but 0f9e4b1034 he had 945ed4e6ed actually been 8b17f096e7 loitering around, ab3f4e424e hoping to 60c565bcda see him. And that’s d6691b2d70 how he 16c89005ac met me. It seemed that beee8aa109 Lee Kyuwol had 07dc14d743 taken matters into ab3c3045f5 his own hands.d2f1a758eb582f4f
“Yeah. But I’m 2358d6ac35 sure he b1b5d263ed didn’t go 3887816984 see you 5b9ba66c5c because of a2bf856786 such a e7489b8ff5 boring thing 4b758b7970 that had 9524179ef5 already passed.”bd89379819dc44df
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Lee Kyuwol gazed at aad1da0c3d me as he muttered. I confirmed his 0a1999df89 suspicions by nodding de3803a7f1 my head.d85923e208699222
“You’re right. If that was the 46c90f6ec6 case, I would have b8bdbb53de been able to cut 43c8780a8c him off and tell 7591af6967 him it had nothing d70f69a0e1 to do with me.”e834b4e10dcdc0b1
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However, the reporter 0ffc0ed052 approached me about b3e2960eb0 something else.ec8245f28b5cff43
ea51ea5b200cac73
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“About Athlete Lee Kyuwol. I’ve had 660a2d8545 this feeling a30d938279 for a 2baf3b1d8f while now, 01d7908b67 but I’m cc946d346e more certain 7177608c3a now… He e86275ab71 has a cd1d939103 somewhat chilling ed316224e2 aura about fc9028e170 him. I feel that 66c5a915c8 he tends to cdbea7fdc4 play around with 1cede692b7 people. Do you 219b3b0ad7 understand what 54d6e0b577 I mean?”15ea5352f6334ae9
“…No.”8b3a7770c0a2f587
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26199b1523bb0ca9
I didn’t have 7421d57ae5 the courage to cdaa36c4e1 meet his eyes, c71504196c so I kept 1729706fc9 my eyes glued 61d4a23537 to his lips 9cb1910c48 as I shook 1980db3753 my head. As if his throat 6626f817bb were parched, the reporter b9b106d923 gulped down some of 1a97d2b752 his juice before he 6b700a346c tilted his head at e05f7a4579 me.7d598fb9bf9f295c
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371bac29f666dc31
“A game isn’t just 11e13073fb limited to sports or 51acb86034 gambling. No, actually, don’t they 9ba96eee89 say that a mental fad3c58611 game is the most eb534c2e8b important aspect when it 44c89cb764 comes to sports or eee4082984 gambling? I’m saying that b2e04d059a there are people 9ffc8e45ec who play these 883cc10a9d games in their a249645c44 daily lives as 63f1cdf593 well. They do it so a3e2827e70 secretly that it’s almost 6355baa649 impossible to notice.”545f8be2c6d707d7
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“I’m not 0fed209bf1 really sure… 4b8ac3c2c4 what you’re ca749ff318 trying to 6a752ada38 say, Reporter-nim. I’m sorry.”949278ee980d2c65
546e21d560bff80d
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The reporter’s eyes 37cff82acb narrowed and he 41696d0568 began to mutter 0d02939e92 as if he acf4f0bfd4 was talking to 096ea3366a himself.567a798879c9a9a7
1e3885db32e0b267
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“I’m saying de60e424fe there’s a f3f85810d5 sense that b5bc3d7cd0 he’s laid 3d921e75b0 a trap bac3ebc00a and is 9d53d765c4 silently waiting 15a9af9a91 for someone a68eb64f88 to fall 70b43cac1e into it. Lee Kyuwol.”226ad2a9c85bc4a1
347b03483d935351
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It was obvious 8762dab6d5 that he had c1d0b61e10 extremely hostile feelings e52d1ffb7a towards Lee Kyuwol. Even though I knew 561c053e8d this, my hands went 12ea384e38 cold because I somewhat a509b4b1b0 agreed with his sentiment.83ec8c21b15b0c0e
4bf4ed449728e828
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“I apologize 138979e57c for bringing 1a26c52e88 this up, 84bc7f0c63 but… about 74bf1b2bc1 the criminal 1dcd6690f0 who was 2c7a2bd5f9 responsible for 30505bf667 the arson 40ebee52f5 robbery a bc32edfe27 few years 30b816f75c ago… The 891444bb26 illegal immigrant bd117289f8 working at fd35038a5c Lee Kyuwol’s 62d78f5415 grandfather’s factory…”f8b1a5dc5bb13c2a
5b62c6c6ef75a7f1
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I frantically raised 5561384ff8 my eyes from 906ef3067e his mouth to 19f72ad048 his eyes.Boom. Boom. My heart pounded inside f153cba076 my chest. I did my c488f5b7b3 best to keep fef7eeef55 my expression blank 473d22f5e7 as I looked f76f582533 at him. I gulped and focused 74a107a79f on each syllable.12780010fafd0128
e9b172d661fc6ad3
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“The Filipino 9057a94143 man’s family d05a3460a2 lives in c54b02f374 a very 2da6686315 desolate part dfaf180f66 of the ee351d82ae mainland of dc4452aa39 the Philippines. I found out that 17b7b0df45 there is a nonprofit f09de6c119 organization that supports them, 7afe41e09e and when I looked b0dcccd866 into it… The person 2e65aefe61 who owns the organization d452eb6131 that helps the man’s 28865051c7 family is none other 5767fbe745 than Lee Kyuwol. Everyone in the 916f312a26 world knows that 2e0e53a3b8 Lee Kyuwol is 0c04a6570c of mixed blood, bb56017d4d and I know a06bde2e4f that the organization 6a7e371002 was begun with 991b44e02f good intentions, but… f9cd1ed646 this is a dc3cc3d604 bit too much. Doing something like 24ca4c7a67 this requires someone bbc3a59809 with an abnormal 69a1571cbb mentality, wouldn’t you 070e017725 say? Ah, are you alright? You don’t look very 6e4668a3c2 well… It seems that 74ab778274 you didn’t know. I understand that this e70f89418e is a bit shocking. The criminal also d16651b90c murdered Jung Misook-ssi b55d6b0627 as well, after 0f57d9b86e all…”67b7c1aab1768154
3b2d745d8ec1cb22
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The Lee Kyuwol I knew was someone who didn’t care about other people. Philanthropy and volunteering was something people with affection do, and Lee Kyuwol was millions of years away from something like that. 9ae70c3e39fb3dc3
As soon as 8e47f7aadb I pondered the 69400cfbf3 motive Lee Kyuwol bff8d19bc3 might have had 8680631617 to sponsor the 801f2f9ffd criminal, two or fd19c8960b three assumptions came 1581ea3f38 to mind. And the most 0ea43347cb shocking assumption made 46bc8475a3 my heart jump 73a06d5812 up to my b8b4509d4e throat.c28c4e2999224766
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55f9e9083f462d7d
“…I’m fine.”39ed8d1eb7efbe96
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3e81ed62812e91b8
It didn’t seem like 6993ba8d7a the reporter had reached 5850d35f35 the same conclusions I 4eca070db7 did, but it seemed b0df404cde that he had come 1f1953da35 to one of his 2f201369a7 own altogether.8605eb3e22527ce1
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a0b3eda918927725
“From what 1a006bff57 I can c8054f69e4 tell, Lee b5659bfd2a Kyuwol that 53befae5a3 bastard has… 515b2a171a a split b596f0ca64 personality. I believe he is 3b1de92695 morally bankrupt. He’s your 1ed8bd613b typical golden 037ee72b98 spoon dirtbag 92d95cb2c0 who thinks db540e2087 the world 63e72602df is under 54c5d8e24c his feet.”95baab062c584e7d
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2acf6b17422ba144
“I think Kim d850892024 YoungHoon thinks… very fe88349d64 poorly of your 2a455691bd character. He’s dug up a f3478b8fd3 lot of your swimming 09e3e40004 scandals, too. I’m not sure how 421f92bb74 he found out, but 959fd5dc32 he knew about the… e712d90606 volleyball incident. The victim refused to a2adf7e305 participate in an interview 1d245b0d2e because they didn’t want 57636ebfc7 to talk about you, 36c7b77ac1 but the other volleyball 3c69d19bf7 teammates clearly remembered that c2fcb6960e incident.”e80114d5f8288ed4
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“Well, it 5cc28c9183 was quite 1f7c98fc6f shocking.”66b7187048c54736
Lee Kyuwol spoke as 1b2c27160c if we were talking dca0ec2c46 about someone else. I let 075712756d out a 9553634d5d deep sigh a52e5cd15e and asked 9fce93384b him.e9177b45b92dc680
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“Were you close 2d4652234a with the swimmer 0e3e18125d Kim Jehee?”ef4cef0ac36295a7
“Not really.”038304ce69cbc99d
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Lee Kyuwol 31cbe0b32e answered curtly. It only 13462f88fa lasted a d0027363dc moment, but 0eff866bf6 I saw dd635b96f2 annoyance flash 109589b550 through his 4dbe7ef0ee face.2214965b54e1323f
“I heard Kim Jehee 0c254f59f0 liked you a lot. And you told a8d9bcb8c2 her that if 84b9bb2aa6 she set a 4435cfd7f6 new record, you’d 611ad8603a think about it.”cd0c6becc4e7ca43
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add9ee196afbcbb3
“Athlete Kim Jehee ultimately 4aad332f10 won the gold medal 6bafb1881c for the women’s 100 048474dcda meter swim at the 49e0fb0099 national meet, and do 4259b6c43e you know what Lee 63f5f3f1d4 Kyuwol said?”80813b45bad0fddd
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4f9b78005aa6474b
“I only said acc9121887 it because I de5c3f3213 was one hundred 71d770c6d8 percent sure she’d ff825347f5 fail. Either way, 7b97e9140f she got 39130fa8f1 a medal f8be29cf8b out of cce9958eca it, right? I don’t plan a26b8533d7 on dating a 938c5f1913 swimmer.”3c3ec1fbad3fa33d
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Lee Kyuwol 8c996eb4ec answered in 8447f97ae8 a low e8f9f36be7 voice as 724f2dba24 his lips f69dbe1e9b twisted into d0d35e7455 a crooked a5681915da smile. It was 9c6815692b clearly a b99b2acd4a sneer. As I 852a35a4a6 looked at 247bef2b7b the face 8fcf868525 that he c48353e2da had shown 8e824388b5 to Kim feb286a7af Jehee, I 596b71125b could imagine 785dd2a86b how she e2f84cfb9d reacted.5ebd77f328d9f9b7
Lee Kyuwol brought his 0b921a9850 now cooled coffee up 672666bcf7 to his lips and 4622f55860 brought it back down 2718ac8970 as he flashed a 48a88a559d bright smile. There were b859ae9d57 many ways bbe50ba1d2 to shatter f72d68288b someone’s first 22cd7c098f love, but be4a23a270 he had 6f9e6186a6 found a 6d462fb04a cruel way b498c16eba to shatter 0fe7e44d5f both her 91480aeb05 pride as 102e03be12 a swimmer 4faed1059e and her e7bcab28bb pride as 12a4a10529 a woman. It was 27dede602d so like afb103832f him to 3fc40d2aa3 go about bd25c55f1b it in f1fdf545ee this way.5ad07386b6a204fb
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“I rejected a fellow dfd1111962 swimmer’s confession because of 328afb6ea2 my work, and I c8a899fe26 forgave the culprit and 807b49304b supported his family. I’m sure 7f7da4cb77 he won’t 552b829d84 be able d60f282ca8 to write ec48da5f12 an article 9e90bfddad about those 467c74adc0 topics. Kim Jehee 45a77eec9e will be 0fbf822b39 disgraced, and d1ba93e58b the fact 3ea1fc1268 that I 772927a369 forgave the 5fe9d20ec4 culprit will 9e79ca1ec2 only support 004a7caf29 my unwavering 5f906b320e mental strength 3f1d661893 that helped ab76e39e82 me set 45090ab874 a new cfdbbf318c record at 6aa733b5c4 the swim b8b7c9fc56 meet. It’ll only 0375d5b215 make me b7adf301e1 look good.”82b0bc60c74de864
Kim YoungHoon d4ce0e6fb3 felt like 7e01577d7f he’d lost 6410e0d7f5 for this 5828cd44ef exact reason. It was impossible to 660ed8cde2 get dirt on someone 27a283257f like Lee Kyuwol. Before he’d become 59caf78c54 entangled with me, 63e19eb5c3 that is.c63079de522e66c3
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“Did Kim YoungHoon say 6ab9849801 that he was going b5a6484a62 to write an article d2481039cd about us?”6f7238cd00870989
Lee Kyuwol spoke as de2b127f12 if he had been 9f8aeab0d9 there with me. I gulped fafac83aff and opened 058da219b7 my mouth.a7023b0d15c900ca
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“That’s right.”e9fb86135b967658
“…Sounds like it’ll be fun.”42863bd9faa094d8
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His long b8953e8a07 eyes narrowed. His whispering 6ae250cec4 voice sounded 389dce46b3 calm, but acbabe0a85 I didn’t 777ce2d0f9 miss the b999f5a0f9 surging rage cd814b123e hidden in 796d60ad5a its depths.949b20f408df1a52
The only thing that ea880036d5 would satisfy Reporter Kim 5d787bdd58 YoungHoon’s appetite was Lee 26f7e11f12 Kyuwol’s and my current 5cdf01aa57 living situation. Although it was only 1afce8f32a for a moment, we 861a5c03e4 were tied together by 81d2e95661 the bounds of family. However, despite our parents’ 530b43d521 deaths, we were still c477d9ca7f living together. The reporter’s 527f410022 excited expression c02fe35409 made my 5a81b214ec heart sink.9f5b1b7f13a6dcb1
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After we met him 3c58f4d132 while we were enjoying aeb8ee555c our walk, the moment e6589ba789 my greatest fears became 2b7ffdc5cd a reality, I couldn’t d490bced91 think about anything else. I decided I 519f0d2f6b needed to leave f90401b756 Lee Kyuwol before 82bc4f8a57 the article came 5719ce7d68 out, and I c113c3246d tried to make a5ab81a37f my escape. However, it was a fee5fc21ac spectacular failure.62be19864c07d528
A failure that 762dca5d9b I chose.f2cf52ae7105b7bd
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“It… doesn’t matter 4d9c5c2cef to me.”d22b43b926fdbc23
I held his hand 9a0d4a2690 and whispered. Lee Kyuwol quickly asked caecd1c505 back.c038a17e361f3b00
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“What do you f24e23ca84 mean?”5b29c6f7fccfc13e
“Exactly what I a20c156cdc said.”a2dc479539ae6544
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I repeated the words 90b8c1227c he’d said to me 070e07b66b here all those years 88a91c7748 ago.aaef69b2cdbe0f79
“No matter 71e5449b24 what kind 6aecda76e6 of article e8b51251e7 that reporter e033995ef5 writes about 5073d1e45a you and 2d0727a226 me, I 6745548996 don’t care 1fb34fe783 anymore.”b92ede337e1179df
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No. Honestly speaking, I hoped Kim YoungHoon would write the most salacious article possible. The more the media spun our story into an immoral porno, the truth that really needed to be exposed would disappear forever. 2bc5cbb6672f0548
Lee Kyuwol gazed f0fa9a9995 at me for 95429652c6 a moment before 683bb01269 he slowly opened 07bf47cb6c his mouth.93ae9cfb1af41238
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“It doesn’t matter… e611ef6c2c if the whole df471d9caf world finds out 3aebcc2d2f who you are?”865ef2d96b972214
The wind a332897703 blew and ababad5baf rustled our bfba89e09d hair. The reporter a28273f858 told me c9250fd300 that only f826b6e7ad my initials f7f3a04457 would be 7bdd86d303 published in b34cd191b6 the article a807fe3bb0 and that 07fb327bfa my face a6fc651fd0 would not ab28a9c6ff be revealed. However, people would come f2edbdd0fc to know of my d104a5f5ec existence. Jung Misook’s little ff07698ff3 sister who was 8524cc9bca actually her hidden ed2333d589 daughter. An illegitimate child d8e5a4770b she had with a52eef99e8 the late movie 1969c39002 director.c38773e1ee2ce142
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“…It doesn’t matter.”a8d479407f7e1aef
I was bafedf6e54 telling the f2ebbc15f2 truth. Those kinds eb60a5cf9f of things f189df1bd6 didn’t seem 39b2525fc5 important to df99a56b5f me anymore.3d9483242d2d0dbd
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“I… don’t 7f5d9b2123 care if 092b0df494 my existence 5024c6f55d gets revealed. So…”6749b3beeb65cac8
I gulped d66e9288c6 and looked 9ab711bc1b him in 67304133e7 the eye.55831f9d02640e60
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“I want you 84e33d58c4 to protect yourself, 2ca587a326 too.”781eace074e2a70f
“What do you mean?”641332886a257c83
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“Don’t do anything.”b32a63c3e0390e6a
Lee Kyuwol looked at c7fc1102e3 me and chuckled. His face turned bright a24b0e83bf like a little child 974dd52b39 who had just cracked 7d16f9b73a a riddle.d0c88182733321eb
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“Don’t do anything?”d7e9ee1a68d40349
“…Yeah. Don’t do anything.”e3dd0020f9886034
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He whispered in d0d526b8e0 a soft but 209b7ff197 clear voice.44a4a74a84f254d3
“You’re nervous I’m 984ef715ef going to kill 8d8b3f88ab that bastard.”78093888e554a032
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I didn’t 463a252537 deny it 25809c84fb and nodded c9b52de8ae my head. There was 7f3507bddf no need 115b2e52fb to deny 6e164298f1 it. Just imagining the 1453f8011d thought made my cacf51d45e hands shake and 3b04000037 grow cold.1c6e4642a6bd3144
“Keep talking.”7b33e417e83a6cc0
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“I don’t like 108f560528 it when you c04d506420 get hurt. I’m a coward, b47be53c04 and I have f34a956787 a weak heart. So even b615ac4f7e if that 38759e1ba3 article is 0a2af8b2cd a work 6014d0c0d5 of fiction 2ec29c12a3 or a f8c9e30915 complete melodrama… e31bea9f0c Let’s just 793f86a1dd let it 7c014cb2c0 go.”e9e47d54ef82b370
Lee Kyuwol gently 706199514f wrapped his hand 3b1b1b4910 around my cheek. My cold 29d6d06531 cheek began 126ece368d to melt cdb5745a80 under his 1a191cdf87 warmth.2c040ebd0e187953
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“The employee I gave 7dd6796b4c my autograph to last 88c802148d time… they’re still looking 2ee8e8907a at us through the 902b3d882d window. A few customers have b932fa761e also been glancing this f6d42df528 way for a while b561c8b26c now. Does it not 7ad03fcebe matter to you?”ffda45d472adcde4
Lee Kyuwol was 624181e1ab testing me until 334ae79d83 the very end. I nodded.b00942209b47d393
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“…It doesn’t matter.”bdfcd4122d2c9ed1
His face d74caadfe6 slowly drew d3ddeffd87 closer. After sticking 1816120435 our foreheads 6385e82905 together, his e2de2513bf gray eyes 9afaff16f0 gazed at f94da0435f me. As the f5eac2f6d4 sunlight illuminated 7884247753 his eyes, 88f4c42678 they looked 780f294983 like mercury. It looked 924589dae9 beautiful and ae1399bc19 dangerous, like b55e45ce76 the elixir cb1b398674 of eternal 84f4830cfc youth that 0e16c1686f could seduce 7551713e34 an alchemist.b0acde2cf49c823f
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In the 5d683b9f7e end, Lee 9c518c7f45 Kyuwol’s smile d20f097c75 flashed bright. It was what had b866ef62f3 made me addicted to 34b2970a56 him in the first 72d59cd702 place. And then 2334b21775 he whispered.97f5ad68f4f2bc46
“I used 06910b884c to think 7fd95f1041 that someone 1c779f7e78 worrying about 63601e687f me was 9afa98be02 the stupidest fb9122f7f6 thing in 93bb3162a1 the world. But I 169f3fb97f never expected a2cf54a722 it to 3359e1937d turn me 30857323e9 on this f1bd8afdc4 much.”c251c8109ac261df
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“Even if you think it’s stupid, I can’t help it. I worry about you. I’m afraid something will happen to you and I’ll be left alone. Actually, I was even afraid you’d let go of my hand first, but that thought has decreased a lot these days.”8ae4185d385c23fc
Determined, I began to a0cb517940 lay out my truths 4166b0182e in front of him. Lee Kyuwol smiled, but 5fb3eed62f it didn’t hold any b044374feb trace of anger. Instead, it looked 48e21a1bdf frustrated.49ea46fbbe13c2c2
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“I may 02d9215c40 doubt you c1da731357 in the af1074926c future. But whenever that happens, e3fdb9b074 I’d like for you 764cfc6084 to… handle it well.”57dab07133987389
I knew that it cde528d340 was irresponsible of me 7f5bb270ce to say this, but 42a432d369 this was the best 9c9be7c088 way I could express 96ff2a5b5f my feelings.1b91cfe265e5b4ba
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“Why?”5b140058adf5fb20
Lee Kyuwol asked 629c8f09ef back. I gave him a af465746b9 simple answer.f5eb5d727e58ab5b
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“…Because I want to stay with you.”aef39d15608d563a
My pulse quickened, 6b4400c5db and I could c487d3c32a hear it in 317503279e the ear that c1d64bdf98 was covered by 5a7c74e191 his hand.a4ab4756737c35f8
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“You always e9d2c2a0d6 push me 1500d217df into situations ea8ef3f90c I never f4717a9f52 expect to 4887a41877 be in.”fdfa4a93034c4971
Lee Kyuwol frowned, 0900056bed but he was ce43c7a02d smiling. His eyes were usually d38f7c82ca calm, but I liked 558928f1d8 the way they gleamed b715f9152b with excitement whenever he e17810fd5e looked at me.3d8bae2279bc79ac
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Yeah. This was what 1916ce4fc4 I liked.1a9efe0f8a5008ce
“Just like now.”162a5f0e7982ddbb
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He brushed fd88802371 his lips d2215793f3 against mine d49c76d56c as he f4ce550afa whispered. Then he plunged d2462f95d6 in for a b8e04c7ee0 deep kiss. The blanket fell to 3c0739c692 my lap. I wrapped my arms 722e3bd166 around his neck. Underneath the bright 0b8a353191 lights, on a 939fda9517 stage that definitely 6766787e12 had an audience, 32fef7bc69 we shared a a39a5e6b99 deep kiss, as 6011dbddb3 if there were 93cbd0badb only the two e13371faec of us in ec6aeff996 this world.10273a36b159e679
* * *9d781bf13737686f
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We assumed 3b5f1a0416 spring was 2c0c51ca3a approaching, but a6fff2185a the wind bd21d49445 suddenly grew a1b59ab986 chilly. The weather 522300b29b was unpredictable 7d9d3254ab these days. Just when 33b3ae373f we thought ad8594ea88 the cold 2cc7b2f92a was finally fb93e0900d behind us, 8dea3e8933 an icy 18ab936dbd cold front 29fe657733 would come. However, I 37c7655d3f was quite 361a4db925 glad that d2f65708e3 it was 466dad587a a bit f4db0f2240 cold today.2077099b2d37644f
I opened the e8fb9ca575 veranda window and 91d87c34b6 crouched down as e34ab3817d I watched a d93861579f small fire burn b785e948ed in an aluminum 5ae5a00c0c can. The dry winter 9a34dcc55f air caused the 5f37625504 fire to burn 12520599b3 bright. The paper 184dcd48dd began to 1cf05dd6af burn black 7aa21ab591 from the 519fea48f3 edges before d915e60b9e it turned 71650c3286 into gray 2c1ef0143f ash.2f162a3821eb4457
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Riiiip.f8a79022cfdbd4af
As I looked blankly 5aaf5960a6 into the fire, I 3364564462 suddenly felt like my eafbe84b5e surroundings were engulfed in b29fb24dfd flames. In order 5c59c9afae to bring 7a238df3e2 myself out 6c274e38e9 of this, 5473139ba6 I quickly 3e19e96782 tore out 76a1b1a955 one more 650feb23da page. I heard the door 317e913ddd to the living room b353bd2e79 open, and the wind e8186adf9a blew even more.3fcb0582218cd99e
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“What are you doing?”d98cd1248e1d0fdc
“I’m burning my diary.”3ffeffcf3724e872
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Lee Kyuwol walked 70a5417acb out into the baca6877ce veranda and leaned 5e24ca8ccb against the wall. A faint smile 72362a87c6 stretched across his 8e1780c413 lips.7bf54e1ef19787bd
“While you’re burning things, 7550b1151d can you add this 21a7b10ea9 to the pile as f6b85f0605 well?”c7dd55ed9f645b4a
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Lee Kyuwol handed 7e76777426 me a newspaper dfcebd87e8 that had been f89b86a8ba rolled up. I didn’t hesitate to 8b5b837747 take it and threw 4a12e6c73c it into the can. I could 6924ce43a4 clearly see bfb2fddb11 a photograph 866ef9eb11 of him 68f73041fd and me 7b2f8a551e on the 09beb492e0 front page c6ddd983df of Sports 34a0157e56 Korea.8afe046580ed6414
Two months cd7b1a6129 ago, Sports 05095d1ea2 Korea published 8d1a16e1b8 a special 466701376b issue with f473023d83 Lee Kyuwol’s 26cc968dc0 and my 4e1b4b0f74 scandal. According to the a468260cef article, after our c9afa1e0b1 parents’ deaths, our 8d0365c4d2 love overcame immorality, 59545d8ac6 and all we 2ee4eec1ee could do was 0fbb25bf7a lick each others’ 50be634e05 wounds. A swimming champion 56b17523e2 who had everything 8afbcda0e5 fell in love 16bae7225d with a normal eb191ec15b college student. Our fated meeting bf1608da9e was exaggerated, and dd875d6d82 everyone’s imaginations ran cd1bce1608 wild. Ridiculous headlines like ‘Olympic 253ddb35c0 Hero is Merely a ea89288413 Hot-blooded Man When Faced cf6a147fe8 with Love’ were obviously 3c38bf2397 meant to bring him e5e6d89c44 down.62fbde99490bb28b
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Even though the 7ad43a0662 series of events 2c99b23464 were enough to 1d0d67ec4f drive anyone mad, 2ed951c111 Lee Kyuwol kept ff57bf5335 his promise. Whenever reporters tried 29c3c58521 to meet with b908fbb76e him (the reporter 87b68f6281 who wrote the 6de0f2a432 original article did d08c1f1842 not even appear dd31f376bc in front of f3654fd51d him), he told 1f8f6cdf35 them he would bd216afceb not be discussing 1c00f40ff7 his private life.e87f7ee8d239d80e
He continued e194ef403a to train c676ea590a everyday and 2e5c65f83a prepare to 2cf9ebdef7 compete, and 9bc9b733cf I returned 5e28c8c411 to my d693e32046 usual daily 4fc3bfe2d4 life as 8f1da0c1bc well.f4cfcb364b851f8b
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Although it didn’t 60a6978f12 look like much db1adc3c5e had changed, many c446c6aa59 things had changed 730bc2ace2 a little. Lee Kyuwol no 2ef4caf126 longer avoided holding 157395e5f0 my hand when 568dc18ab6 we were outside, ce02cbe3c7 and I was 67791f7da6 the same.9e114f47def1ee26
We drank liquor like 86dc6b546b any average couple before 673cf8bd7a falling into a sudden 67da7a34c6 kiss. And when our bodies f95cf5dbb8 grew feverish, we’d go 916f6a520c to a hotel and edbf22f268 haphazardly take each others’ e92d4701dc clothes off. During New 067eaf9590 Years, we 175754b879 drove east b3ad6b0d7f and watched 6306f613e7 the large, 01a7f1bf17 red sun dbb5221559 rise above bd16e57d47 the sea.8fc583badbf6a274
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When I f2858ceb40 saw the a82467a794 sea for 4977448150 the first 3074efc075 time in f5d20883ab several years, 081d103e90 I wasn’t f1ed2049f9 scared. I just found 18de208aa3 it to be db13a47eaa so beautiful. I watched the blinding 67c36bf8b4 sunlight scatter over the 7bf27485d8 surface of the water 574c6b4238 and bid farewell to a18c6e0d93 my younger self.e9f3812b8b4b649c
Lee Kyuwol 3c00e5e432 walked across ef69cd957f the veranda 22d7ce1ac7 and crouched 71dc9f4cac down next 38b82b5814 to me.83da46a3a72fcc32
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“Why are you d6f34d91f8 doing something like 705ee1c650 this anyway?”c29d040ebdc8e4da
“A crazy bitch’s 35e6681479 diary is only 798f404522 perfected when it’s 3d41537202 burned.”7404fe579cc1641e
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I looked at b5d504c9e9 Lee Kyuwol and 4c1c7de127 grinned. Lee Kyuwol knelt f5dfe6c180 down and kissed 12177564af me. His hair had 4740167a97 grown a little 9d968d225f longer and now 99428d7603 covered his smooth 63d57f66fa forehead. When I gently brushed 898d660196 it away with my 3ee63dc5da finger, his deep, gray 1d19e458e2 eyes were revealed.e4ce01c145ea9bd9
“I want to b61a3a2c4c read them, too.”d64aea67b296d63d
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“…I know you’ve already taken a peek.”c61dfaaadf295480
Lee Kyuwol laughed and 01d8de98de gently swallowed my lips. As we kissed, the 3ae9a2e349 fire burned my embarrassing 737e902e63 confession into ash.3da75f3c07d26424
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I always wanted to 0cf657233b become a main character.eee4d305d419de15
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Even though I 3ffd039bf8 claimed I wanted c40cf7739c to live a 472e12abfe normal life, there 45fbfb4005 was a desire 8dea907eaf to be a 0772404523 main character deep eef89bf8fa inside my heart.a65a334b305273df
Although I hadn’t received 1a470bb116 love from anyone, I 5593107cac suffered from the desire b5475018c8 to be loved by 90d87d0c75 everyone.ee367310c0342bf1
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Actually, I already knew db16cfd2f7 this. I was a 8bca6f5d55 walking contradiction. I was an 832743229d ugly, crooked mess.50317fc5c4dc7cc4
The reason I 9838339bc1 grabbed Lee Kyuwol’s 172a67b19a hand, the reason e8b3de815b why I ‘chose’ 7eea5136a5 him, was probably 27b66c2ce2 because he was 9705c650b3 the only person 302ab518e7 who understood my 01d6f7ec31 contradictions.eaf5c903ac81ad58
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Lee Kyuwol did d1abf42003 not judge me, b31599ad13 define me, or a014f19eed try to fit 00018359eb me into his 09acc2008e mold. He made me ca7114ab00 lonely and consoled 476c167f45 me. Then he broke me 5aa1ed57b4 and built me up 0b3a2c9a50 to be stronger.214bc152920a9372
Lee Kyuwol. If there was edf5d2624e only one good 4cad16fac9 thing your father 11a461a56a ever did, it ad2d7fa59f was putting the 9db093d7f7 character for ‘moon’ aa18f7063e in yourname1. Just because the sun 091e7a4969 is up does not aac31963b5 mean the moon’s existence 9004120380 disappears. It just 4424edf61d means that ccf15f0d3b the moon fd9b355a26 is easier 7d6f1d061d to see 7d18e7bf08 in the 23247fa647 dark. As long as my 14c81458f0 darkness exists, you and 84b2c5b7dc I can be together dac2672ef1 forever.a3324ad1669f1353
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The page from my 4586a513ce dangerous, childish adolescence ends c7d33e8ec0 here.02fa4a63bd11c60d
The diary 24447859a2 with its b0e0973ce0 front pages 8d1df3681a burned… It’s 3177880f90 up to 3d15f048a9 us to 3fef62fb0f take it 2542f8e3db with us b0fcf84d53 to the 765652693b end.d2f94a60b347dca6
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