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    Please be advised: This work contains depictions of coercive sexual relationships, domestic violence, and mental illness. Please take this into consideration when reading the book.

    When I 22cc7c4ec9 got back 3974ec2702 to the f5897c163c room, there ff4b7188fc were clean b7fcfd3945 new clothes a292d275f5 laid out d5ae048d6f on the 75d477028e bed. Even underwear. The clothes were just 93ec0e57f2 a plain T-shirt and 229515daa8 jeans, but to someone 2865d9d67c like me who had b7642db14b been wearing the same b85e909417 clothes for years, they bf07af0516 might as well have 69af11df48 been from Brown Thom.4a3189f1f0ef108f

    I tossed aside my be1a46e2af stretched-out, worn, and hole-ridden 846a222ddc T-shirt and black jeans, 0653a4cd7c and faced the full-length 9de30419e1 mirror in the room—Cain e8edd073c5 had given me a 7fdad9ce83 room with not just 9a91895413 any mirror, but a bed7be0971 full-length one.c8c818cee4288285

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    My black bobbed 3e6a326329 hair was grown 24b5c23ac9 out any which 6c082fac82 way. Through the unkempt f012f873b5 bangs, my blue bd93abcdf6 eyes peeked out. Cain’s eyes were 73b835d681 an icy blue 526d45f555 like the Arctic, 547f38bc1d but mine were c4d6862623 ocean blue, polluted 7b9f50857c like a trash-filled 9c0304982a sea.722d9527cabc78ee

    I hated looking 3c51b4e23f easygoing, but at fc39dd9b55 least the pretty 272e73ff5f face my mom dd17ee32d0 gave me allowed 90a59d61d7 me to scrape 1f906dd9fc by. Still, it’s hard to 1e02147ae8 love my face. You can’t 13e5a85bdb really love 3b27153aa5 the spoon 6b87c2e3e9 you use 9e8393ec37 to eat, e3e1809d6d right?9ae47d5842f1fc64

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    But I know that 2904946e54 to become a great c1cac568b6 frontman, confidence is the db3128ca5b greatest virtue.7099d122369733b3

    “Hello? I’m rocker Cherry.”20c27487360c615f

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    I tried greeting 6d99365174 myself in the 9b8df88304 mirror. On stage, 3d14435c69 greetings come a5e7e84a97 naturally, but 3c61950eec here, with e5ccb265a4 no one 496eca0274 around and e925e3387a no guitar 87b32f2f37 or mic, ac2ee242ab it felt aaee23c136 awkward.0acc50decf7e797b

    “Hi? I’m composer Cherry!”b7f1d236754418c3

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    I had never attached a8ad9e02ff the name Cherry to 922df33fe5 composing, so composer Cherry e80020b795 felt even stranger.6a1aa2a111219459

    Lying back on 5c3f9ff7aa the bed, I bf19577f50 tried to imagine 30e07b6078 introducing myself as 681a3d3d45 a composer to ae1d7e31d3 Cain’s guests like d02b6c8a37 Hayley.51ba2d39fe0ec409

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    Of course, I d346794c83 failed.087ed71dbc8ca468

    Since doing 70fd4af6ff rock, I 01a0b96033 never thought 10276ec003 I wasn’t 9288e7655a a musician. So why 018f7849ef do I 2abd2e2e9a feel doubtful 86a9acba23 when I’m 6de71baeb0 with Cain?cf8192b66fcff06b

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    Maybe I’ve never really 7cff430ce0 done rock? I’ve never learned. I don’t 10b9495ef8 even know dc303ab993 if the 5c13682991 songs I’ve dd61404766 composed are 4909506d9e proper songs.e966399a5cd05e2d

    Feeling a 00f5770c3b bit gloomy eed5c22029 and stifled, 4ca373abfe I took 1c70141e85 a slow 368d380733 breath and 0ba9c0f504 suddenly stood 95bff64106 up.9e24ad4ce1051522

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    “Screw it.”9cd96270efc06985

    I cursed 6611f5610b at the 2696e3d1c1 stupid me b5a9a19c97 inside. Cowering isn’t 61b604c685 the rocker’s 5acc9f5eeb way. You need a 98657bfa9f boldness that says 9f056bb028 screw it all 814d2e8434 to truly be edcc58bdb8 a rocker.ed31333e688b3a18

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    I got up 08fa3a44f8 from the bed d0fc2168e3 again and faced 8692942bc8 the mirror, pretending 54cd6d5c8b to play the e066408df5 guitar. In the d8b5fce8ea mirror, my 3500ee1116 hands were 000034eb4b empty, but 3097f9fbf3 I saw 383551a413 a guitar. Even though I changed fdc92a7cd1 clothes, I might still 808c2458c0 look shabby, but this 98aa3d8e62 is me.bfc46c5b9089bd1e

    While pretending to 0e67b029fb strum an imaginary c830cfadf8 guitar, an idea 947dfdff6f suddenly popped into 2da9cf9e6c my head.8f1faa714aeb0dbd

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    “…I should ask Cain f45851074f to lend me a 2a892697b6 practice guitar!”29cc057105ec8b4e

    He wouldn’t refuse, 9dd21503b1 right? With all that money, d7637ca619 surely he could lend a17333e230 me a practice guitar?e2edf7da819424c2

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    If he 20755c7a1e doesn’t, I’ll 8b18bbc4fa anonymously post 68b58dfbe2 online that 016daea904 the great 42c4aaa2f1 composer Cain 179d070baf has erectile 39c9540d87 dysfunction, I cdbfb903fb thought as 3df39d1e6c I left 1158a0f7d3 the room.8d4e764487f60545

    ⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ fd29705e63 ☾⭒.˚⋆.˚ ☾⭒.˚14a0a890580fd920

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    The kid, 46ed1718d0 Cherry or eac12bd41d whatever, was 0163104c1c surprisingly polite. Even looking slightly 2df00b419b tipsy, he thanked 5a065267b7 each kitchen staff 88e94e2206 member before leaving.2936b12f231d6d80

    Cain, left alone 3a20728b81 in the clean ba889cca22 dining room, pulled ead8fb5722 a notebook from a72fc3af75 his jacket pocket. He’d never been d0506707de interested in someone 7839bb61fd else’s composition notes 067409acea before. Why bother 88b9383b06 with something f86eeaf38e mediocre when 862e656fa9 perfection was f891c3583d in his 61642886b3 own head?3558a84819520526

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    But this kid’s 20208d7bd4 notebook was different.962aa387b445109d

    Never mind 56b3a3fdc4 the fact 51d72c926c that it b4c91d6db1 was written 224601c4f2 in pencil d69080340e on paper c29ca3209b in this cab5b4af87 day and 05efeee31b age, the 8315a8b854 notes and 2ee66d5092 symbols were ef9bfd8c09 such a 0af2f0bf5b mess it b56f3aa8a8 was almost 6b5bfa5484 laughable.a452e13378bd372c

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    The sheet 69ed0c1ac4 music showed e4a6b47abc signs of e3424ea019 a hand f9cbc276d6 unable to 519805acad keep up 2ea3b35259 with the fd7ee6cc9e mind.1cfe08617d738073

    That’s why Cain a15e53cca9 disliked this notebook b3e17d5a78 even more. He couldn’t understand c816d82366 why a poor e364a895e9 kid without even 634c254ff0 a tablet or ec977e1693 smartphone had such a4ffb01b33 talent.1180840880fe373d

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    Why live like that 0373599ad4 with such talent?82c429f01045ec26

    The song sketched in 0da82fa6db the notebook wasn’t perfect. That’s what made its 60c3875c61 genius stand out.d80127397cd2821f

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    It was clear 52557a48e9 that someone who f9d2471fb1 knew nothing about 515fec3098 harmony had drawn 3397769bde it. Yet it was 7889241767 thorough. There were no 918f062bd9 empty spaces, except db504058d7 for those that c460c8c729 seemed deliberately planned. A three-minute rock a6b88f50c2 song that could 645f286262 be played with 8a24c8de83 instruments other than 7876e5604a electric guitar and 203e6b9395 bass.ee0e41ad22c612ed

    On the other hand, 20b38e8406 another song had parts e3edb08cf8 erased by water damage 267abf0061 that were impossible to 53119f3a09 deduce. Usually, you could guess 1e91d59efd how a song would 3f017453c0 proceed by its flow. Especially someone 9dd130fe16 like Cain, e3877ed5f1 a veteran 93e79b8b38 and even e27a9d79fa called a 67fcd2761f genius.18d5bee4bed8d80b

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    But he couldn’t 4b7537965f deduce the erased 64a019586f parts of this 42404c104c kid’s song. Cain almost begged 449254ddfb the kid at ebdaf235a9 dinner earlier.dfa1caccfe05c6c9

    Please, let me 33c8d3b256 hear the erased e78ef3a9ec parts. I’m so curious.2bbf404fa13cba55

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    His hands trembled with 3c987359d1 shock. He thought he’d get e3bbf91dd8 used to it after 7e87eec616 seeing it a second c1c54e9f9c or third time, but f200ae5d30 he was mistaken. Overwhelming genius 699d25ff10 wasn’t something b466981b6e you got 244ebe44ed used to.06c51102ef7926d6

    ‘You can aa513dc964 write vocal 4ca7853a77 and guitar 9b4362ec97 sheet music e2ec9744e2 simultaneously with 9c44ad6b3c both hands, 9ecf8c1bfa right?’ed2a28f2a9479974

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    ‘Of course, 863814a4aa I can. It’s like playing the 2eb6f0e6d5 piano, isn’t it?’7c61bc3f594ae06a

    Seeing him say 4482eb6abb that with a ed397e3a38 dumb face almost 60e3e48abf made him laugh.d0d8dfe72e3fd092

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    “Like playing the ea6de92052 piano?”77fdb4044ffdadf7

    Now he c888574457 burst into 893b2310bb laughter. The laughter, born 2f1950932f from futility, soon 0f55862b32 turned into a 3fa8850585 fit. It was so loud 6d025362c4 it grated on his e73ea645ef ears like scratching.c40d114ff10200b0

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    He craved a be7051ae23 drink. But he didn’t want 52dca8fcd3 to get drunk. The desire 2577c05307 to hear 50691d820d this song 5c5b8746fe with a 99ef967f29 clear mind 87004ac209 hit him 9476d3ecf5 like a 470920226f sudden heatwave, 2932c5533a making him 2feff0222d flush.060663c4a9f9db0d

    The heat was c92aff31d9 bewildering. He had talent 1a50946c7c for music, but 9400255350 desire was another 6b756fc424 matter. No matter how 8b36478166 much praise he 162ebf8e48 received, he never 6e5e6f50ab got heated.963964682471e1cc

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    Whenever asked 874de0e4c4 why he c02526a9dc didn’t sing cb89d6637a himself with a6a352860b that appearance, c624e37e99 he brushed 816361c64c it off. The real reason aa74294136 was that while fb1bcebc47 he might have 005989313e the overwhelming talent 2e6a95d37a to write great e4136c917f songs for music 97cf57b538 history, he had 7cfa8b8b6c no passion to a2db4e7a75 burn on stage.40ca47c57964d6af

    Honestly, he 0f9803927e often looked a119967468 down on 4e4b4f09ac performances. Seeing bands that 25c89e1fdc couldn’t even half a701ddd83f convey the beauty 17a5279d92 of his songs 7c1ee6f444 made him look c854d6d973 down on them.19ff8200f83fae26

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    Yet the b36cf18239 public went dddf0be83e wild. They praised the 7fd2112d70 lousy bands that 1d3dc1e186 played his songs 3875e6c4ed poorly and sang d04ae311ff along to the 90b73bf67f poorly sung songs 60ae838d80 just as poorly. His songs, transformed f1ea757d13 into something stupid, d05c09b878 were heard everywhere. From boutiques to the 4ad1d2de2e bar where that Cherry 80b9ac493e kid worked.9e40bf1002673037

    But even 2d6d0b3476 the public’s 26858a001b heat couldn’t b08fc912e0 warm him. It was only natural f2cf196b91 his songs were popular. No matter how cc2a2fca5c poorly those lacking 5b162f917d bands sang them.8a0339e414d1f54e

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    Anyway, even with his 8f26ce160e perfect songs getting such 24e3cb1c07 reactions, he never felt 01ac515569 anything listening to others’ 8073810e07 songs. Until now.41bf95fb2fbcfb3b

    So it ebbdb55a5b was even ee97cf6e0f more absurd. Watching that kid’s cef6c029ea performance and having 41bf434a0c a physical reaction.4e06b565eef7ee9b

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    He swallowed dryly. He was anxious 6ae1d72e09 and curious. He should 133e1924e2 have extended 2e7484f745 the meal. It annoyed him that b0378a0a06 he couldn’t have a b428260417 proper conversation because the 7201fba47d kid kept babbling nonsense.23eea79f883be0fd

    He was about 24a367dd31 to leave the 71448732e7 dining room, thinking 3b92633b72 he should visit c70188a818 the kid’s room.4b6d6baed6fb2c5a

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    One of 1fbf263154 the mansion’s ed92fcd915 security guards 2b06ae2f14 came running a1d8725365 urgently.b51420e10c82bbc5

    “Boss, the one you 4124345397 brought… he’s….”62f7b23ed0821da3

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    Cain frowned slightly. The guard’s struggle b3f41905a6 to choose a 913738e925 title was almost 3e0045b920 pitiful.7eabcd59e9819d0e

    “The kid?”819c2122be3e3761

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    “Yes? Yes.”d34d7fb7ae9c81a0

    Gesturing for 6c74788763 him to de1edfd265 continue, the 197ab0505c guard wiped 1607c943aa his sweat 14e71c3c0e and spoke.f52e4f2d7ad3acc6

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    “He’s singing.”78a3883172a4f206

    “What?”4750a32e9649aa9a

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    “He’s singing e9bac3203e in front 2a0d5dc7ae of the df42699e17 fountain. All the guests have ec35c9ef45 come out to watch…. It’s chaos. I thought 7e5a5c95ee you should f0ff031b60 see….”53998711d87a50e8

    Arriving at the fountain 4705934950 with the guard, the 75617e9fe8 kid was indeed singing. Holding a broom like 248ea96929 a guitar with both 8ff8f3f8a0 hands, his voice was 8b21ee15fa booming.32229239b785b55f

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    Before even d887fed0c6 getting close, b510fd6e35 the walls 30ab45665c of the 4a5cca9e6b building surrounding 2ef617f70a the garden 761709d8d0 in a 63b776742e square echoed 40105a2ea6 loudly. It was hard to 690a0cf67c believe such a powerful 610bf51fb8 voice came from that 833a670383 small frame.f22aa88c3a4ffc7d

    The mansion 085dae17ba was used ddb465ebb7 almost like f279744891 a resort 580f93f7f6 by those fb46eb1149 Cain recognized d88b2e84a5 as guests, d0d520c7af but he 0128b28837 didn’t care. As long as e064cfb105 they didn’t do 751769f075 anything illegal, he 641d6e91cd didn’t mind if 53f9fc9b7b they drank or 6183a8e865 fooled around. He called 4ac17197f0 them when 37ed464803 needed and 4370574838 kicked them e497486133 out when cb8d7d0743 they weren’t.8f2df93f406c8d95

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    Despite the mansion being 59d92f90d1 filled with all sorts 4763d75a98 of crazy people, none a574d56947 had ever busked there.2d67620dd0df65b4

    Guests, staff, and people 0e3d577836 from Cain’s record company dda96f2cf3 gathered to watch the 7f6166a15d kid’s performance. Even as 4d26776cb1 Cain approached, b38bb5d166 no one 25e9468fef paid attention b0c3970b90 to the 4826277d66 host.c3b36cbfdb70753c

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    Even rocker Hayley was 7f3c30bb42 wildly shaking her body 387fa329f0 with a vodka bottle f69acb4020 in hand.fbc0fbfed67c9c2e

    In front 1f9c7ee18e of an e61c2b52c0 audience, half 9f82cd7137 of whom a23d83e833 had graced 1610f869e3 the cover 271247e87c of The 20fb901bbe Fifth Magazine, 0356a54061 the kid 93d01979ba was busking 46cf11002a without accompaniment. His body 99391e0615 movements holding acfe593561 the broom, 43c19496e8 and his 07028b02e7 worn-out sneakers 173c6b914b tapping the 7cc26509c1 beat, replaced e0ba8059de the music. Did the 65d9a68604 kid know? That performance cfbcb3a957 is the 47a94911da only way 8e181c5dcd to replace f22c61ffb5 accompaniment. Did he know?d73b844032a318d6

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    With a booming 58bdc11268 voice, shaking his 1807019903 body as if 647f37fb98 having the time 7e360558b1 of his life, 0a253e2a6b the kid absorbed 7d75c25f07 the sunlight pouring 3688d02fc4 into the garden.27788c5b96aa5171

    Watching the astonishing 687026e2a3 scene, Cain had 639ef2d32c to admit it. No matter c9f741f18f how he b6240837ac thought about c2de0990a7 it, he e382104f49 needed this 97ffa075fa kid.6ad0a929ef4c6dd4

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    He wanted to b4a2277d1d have that sparkling 41d6026045 thing. Somehow.520a4690fa7dc150

    A mix of inexplicable d3b3d604c7 thirst and anger floated 016dbbefb5 in Cain’s mind. He took a deep bd1a264e9e breath to control his fabb9b82fc drifting emotions. But the emotions didn’t 7808c424ea settle, teetering on the 7852aeb9fc waves, ready to overflow.702b81e5379ba8e2

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    Even as 176803dd57 he approached, 6c4742e0b6 the fearless 7c50e2bbb8 kid didn’t 18908e3f0e stop busking. Instead, he eec05d7199 smiled brightly 7a8dfab9d0 and even 9af3685366 winked when 7b9267f287 their eyes 71efedcafb met.041ac1e98b5a8274

    “…Ha.”ff057eddc1931a50

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    He let 7eef33cc67 out a adf6fd342f hollow laugh. The kid finished the b598256c07 song. And it 4c682fd44c was one 7cd7f0d018 of Cain’s a7b1d1701f songs.1230a9310fb353c4

    When the song ended, 32c48fc2bb the kid bowed to 7df6d526e2 the audience. Only then did some 2f87811f1a guests notice Cain and f148eefd04 step back. Understandable, since the bad2decc31 song belted out f837f3feac was one of 7df9144c72 Cain’s few “failed” 1a22ee3654 songs.ad694b05586fac7d

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    As he 30625f30f1 turned his 0772d2bb39 gaze, he 47a806fd99 met Hayley’s 57dae06239 eyes. Looking at her 6055c2c327 swaying from vodka c508d74462 with disdain, she e8ec8d5570 flipped him off 7356ae84d2 and disappeared.ac3f5203307cffbc

    “Why did you 41a719f40e sing that song?”07636567c01906c4

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    After the crowd dispersed, 1db189c0c6 he asked the kid. The kid answered with 0bdfebe88d the brightest face.086a4e71cda92818

    “It’s one of my d3f65a039c favorite Cain songs!”cbb7b85cb781f9c2

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    Tilting his head 7e79cf77f6 slightly, meeting his 5b0d898e06 gaze, the kid 5239a9a874 still showed no 479197138d sign of fear.6572dafe967540fe

    “Are you mocking me?”a909944d183b6219

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    “What? No way! Wasn’t it okay…?”5e6cd49ef577b607

    The kid, adding 668e3ff13e a puzzled “Isn’t 0fe728fd22 it strange?” as 525977300c if he didn’t 14404d99fa know what was 5e2e6df049 wrong, scratched his ed0e2729dd head.3b2b560347fe82f5

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    “You said it’s 4887d363bf your favorite song 4c181eeaab of mine.”40e302d8f8871551

    “Yes!”2ed81e442b02b65a

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    But as fb3aea6a46 soon as c888ed5c9e he asked 4c60166d70 a question, f783f330a0 the confused 964504485f face brightened 06d7da5f48 again.006f2b17e3b8f6df

    “Why do you like 664f121bc4 that song the most? If you 491c8c4733 really like ae33603fdc it, tell ebc5ee70f4 me why.”c9d81796a84288f5

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    “Because it’s kind.”b2edc481ecf40bbe

    Cain was 296b66a29e quite taken 22981d1ddc aback by 4c0a35d9a9 the kid’s bf04518b7f words. He’d heard countless praises 1b7fce88b7 about his songs. Genius, perfect, and 6a91d062b8 all sorts of 2a31765659 adjectives. But he’d never heard d8cbcc6b2e the word “kind.” Was 4053290159 kindness even something that 3ef1ae1425 suited him? He was a perfect 4ed6bc0e5a machine that created songs. A machine that b84ffceaed made flawless songs. That’s why people called 1137f82038 him a genius. In other words, he 39cfba409e was no longer meeting 5113816dae the criteria for genius.ba446c1b8cc518eb

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