LV Chapter 7.2

As soon as he arrived at school, Sasya realized he had been greatly deceived by George. He had arrived 30 minutes before the morning class was scheduled to start.

George seemed to think he needed that much buffer time to get ready, but he was wrong. Since he didn’t even need to go to the locker room, arriving just 10 minutes early would have been enough. Feeling annoyed at having rushed unnecessarily, Sasya headed to the studio while internally criticizing George.

There shouldn’t be anyone at this time…

“Ah.”

However, as soon as he entered the practice studio, Sasya’s eyes immediately met with unfamiliar people inside.

He thought they were people he didn’t know well, but one of them was Romashina, a former principal dancer who had retired a few years ago, and he could see several current dancers as well. As Sasya glanced at them while putting down his bag in a corner by the window, someone spoke to him.

“So you’re that kid. The one who always practiced in the Met Opera backstage…”

“Ah, he’s the little ghost?”

“Little ghost?”

“Some said there was a child in white leotard wandering the backstage but would run away if anyone tried to talk to him.”

“I remember him too. I tried to share some desserts that came as gifts, but when I went back, he was gone.”

Sasya just stood still without saying anything, feeling shy. He had been regularly visiting the theater’s backstage since last year, and it seems he had caught the eye of the current dancers because of it.

Actually, the times when Sasya visited the theater were, even without him realizing it, fixed to when he felt very lonely and down. When he felt intimidated or depressed or couldn’t find a reason to stay in New York, Sasya instinctively sought out the vitality of the backstage. The backstage had over 400 people coming and going, from dancers to orchestra members, lighting, music, stage crew, costume, wig, and makeup staff.

And in that bustling crowd, Sasya would stretch or practice the center enchaînement movements learned that day. When the chandelier rose to signal the start of the performance and the orchestra’s majestic music flowed through the backstage monitor speakers, he sometimes felt as if he himself was on stage. As he followed the movements while watching the monitor screen in the quiet corridor after the performance crew had left, his gloomy mood would gradually wash away.

“You’ve grown a bit taller.”

“Only a little…”

As Sasya muttered, a notably distinctive person approached him. It was Romashina.

“I think I saw you at the party once. You were really just a baby then. Your frame has gotten a bit bigger and you’re slightly taller. Kids really grow fast.”

Sasya found himself looking up at her with admiring eyes.

Romashina, like Sasya, was from Russia and was an incredibly successful, world-renowned ballet star. Even after retirement, she continued to participate in gala performances around the world, and currently was also managing the scholarship foundation from which Sasya was receiving his scholarship.

The first time he discovered Karel was because he was with Romashina.

At the party held when he first came to New York as a scholarship student. There, Sasya looked at Romashina with the same admiring eyes as he did now. When other children were taking selfies with Romashina, he wanted to take one too but found it difficult to join in, and while lingering around, the person Sasya had approached was Karel.

‘Could you take a photo for me too…’

When Sasya had hesitantly and timidly asked, Karel had gladly taken the photo. And then, to Sasya who was excited about having gotten a photo with Romashina, he asked:

‘Why did you talk to me?’

‘Because you looked kind…’

Though it was a year ago, he clearly remembered it. It was strange. Back then, he had been desperate to talk to Romashina, but now he had become so close to Karel.

Moreover, Karel said he had been watching over him consistently for a year. He was even living with him now. Sasya thought it was amazing how so much had changed in just one year.

“What was your name again… I think you told me back then.”

When Romashina slightly furrowed her brow, Sasya quickly told her his name.

“I’m Sasya.”

“Ah! Sasya Shchedrin. What a cool name.”

Sasya just smiled, understanding why Romashina winked as she said that.

“Are you good at ballet?”

A dancer who had earlier called Sasya a little ghost came closer and asked. With dark skin and piercing eyes, he seemed to be from Southern Europe like José, or possibly from South America. Sasya nodded.

“Yes, I’m good…”

Sasya had only said one thing, but the gathered dancers showed an excessively dramatic reaction.

“Wow! He says he’s good with his own mouth. So confident.”

“Looking forward to it.”

“We’ll be selecting directly today.”

To the gathered dancers’ words, Sasya asked, “Select what?”

“Season promotion. We’re choosing thirty students from the ballet school to dance together.”

Sasya’s heart pounded. It seemed the results of the choreography practice that Vadim had organized into groups would be revealed today. He hadn’t imagined that actual current dancers would be judging.

And just then, Vadim was entering through the practice room door. As if he knew about today’s schedule, Vadim naturally approached and greeted the dancers, also hugging Romashina. Some called him ‘teacher,’ suggesting he had received instruction from him.

“Master, this little one says he’s very good at ballet.”

“Hmph, speaking nonsense with that loose mouth.”

Though Vadim said this while rolling his eyes, he personally moved the barre in front of Sasya. When Sasya grabbed the barre and began stretching with his leg raised on it, the dancers again moved back to the wall. They seemed to be carefully examining the boy’s natural physique while talking among themselves.

His body balance and center of gravity when standing straight, the small thorax made slim by tightening his stomach as much as possible, his completely extended knees, and beautifully raised insteps.

Sasya was born with an almost perfect physique for ballet, but he had one weakness. It was always his lower butt and hamstring muscles that were pointed out. Sasya tensed his buttocks while conscious of his turned-out legs. Only by tightly tensing and making his butt as small as possible could this weakness be compensated for.

Sasya’s body, stretching with his neck extended to its limit and arms reached out, was like a scene from a masterpiece painting. Just maintaining proper posture caused beads of sweat to form on Sasya’s neck.

And during this time when Sasya’s form could be shown to others, Vadim was wearing a rare satisfied smile.

Shortly after, students wearing leotards for morning class filed into the practice room. Some recognized the dancers and covered their mouths or let out small screams. Oksana, who came right next to Sasya and grabbed the barre, looked somewhat surprised.

「Who are those people?」

At Oksana’s question, Sasya turned toward her and grabbed the barre with both hands. Then he stretched his right leg high into the air in a derrière position. As his upper body naturally tilted forward, he whispered to Oksana.

「They’re judging today. It’s the season promotion.」

「What? Why today of all days? I’m on my period.」

「Ah…」

「Look at this. My breasts have gotten bigger too.」

「Um…」

Sasya tried not to look where Oksana was pointing and turned his gaze away. Perhaps because it was a profession that used the body, not just Sasya but most dancers tended to think of their bodies as tools rather than flesh. Both Vadim and the ballet masters always emphasized that a ballet dancer’s body was a tool completely devoid of sexual implications.

He knew this… but still, hearing such direct comments was a bit embarrassing. Sasya looked around, confirmed that José was far away, and then muttered in Russian.

「Don’t say such things to José.」

「Ah, I would never say such things to that cheeky pervert.」

Oksana grinned as if she already knew.

Does that mean I’m okay then? Sasya remembered again the fact that Oksana misunderstood him as being gay. He couldn’t decide whether to be happy about this as a sign of trust, or frustrated that the misunderstanding still hadn’t been cleared up.

At the same time, Sasya felt his aching back as he stubbornly extended his leg once more and grabbed his left knee again. Then he sent his knee straight back behind him, fully extending it.

「I’m going to fail.」

Oksana muttered bitterly. Despite saying this, her stretched derrière height was incredible. Sasya wasn’t good at comforting others, but he wanted to encourage Oksana.

「Why do you think you’ll fail?」

To Sasya’s question, Oksana answered, ‘Because I’m not in my best condition.’ Somehow that sounded like something a real professional dancer would say, so Sasya thought he should remember this too. Recently, Sasya had been making sure to remember Oksana’s impressive responses, as she was good with words, to use them sometimes if he was in trouble.

For example, today’s could be used like this. If Vadim or someone criticized his dancing, it would be perfect to say ‘It’s because I’m not in my best condition today.’

Sasya whispered.

「If you make it when you’re not in your best condition, that would be really, really amazing.」

「Well, that’s only if I make it.」

「Still, Oksana… I think you’re the second best dancer in our class.」

「What? Second best?」

「Yeah, because I’m first…」

He was going to say that therefore she would easily make it into the top 30, but Oksana seemed to take it differently. Contrary to Sasya’s intention to comfort her, Oksana became fierce again. Before Sasya could finish speaking, she cut him off, saying it must be nice to be able to speak so comfortably as last year’s top student, and became thoroughly upset.

The barre work began with Sasya in this flustered state. Even when he might make eye contact while turning in soutenu to do the other side, Oksana deliberately never looked at Sasya.

Moreover, Oksana with her competitive spirit awakened was incredible. She kicked out her battements powerfully, and maintained her points so stubbornly that you could hear the sound of brushing against the floor. Thanks to this, Sasya too was dripping sweat down his back as he extended his neck and stretched his muscles to the tips of his toes.

After the barre work, instead of clearing away the barres and doing center work as usual, everyone prepared the choreography they had memorized. The eyes of the dancers leaning against the wall watching the barre work also became filled with excitement.

Sasya and the five other kids in his group sat down on the floor and put on their tap shoes. The girls who would be doing pas de deux changed into pointe shoes and pressed their toe boxes or warmed up their feet by repeating demi-point to relevé, occasionally holding their male partners’ hands to check their balance.

Looking at such unity, Sasya looked down at Oksana. It would be awkward if Oksana didn’t get over her anger before they had to synchronize even their breathing. But even when he extended his hand to Oksana as she had finished putting on her shoes, she just snorted ‘hmph’ and stood up on her own.

And in the blink of an eye, the first two groups had passed. The teams doing pas de deux in pairs of two could be said to have one or two good dancers, but it felt more like “students trying hard” rather than dance. The next team doing character dance had perfectly memorized the choreography, but lacked the most important thing: character acting and mime. Sasya looked at their dancing while thinking about ‘what would I have done?’

‘I would stretch my toes and press into the floor more deeply right before the turn. Ballet’s beauty comes from the power of extension. And instead of turning with force, I would turn exactly three times and stubbornly stay in passé. Also, I wouldn’t stick my hips out while supporting the girls. I’m not just a support for the girls but a dancer… I should perfectly turn out my extended foot and keep my waist straight.’

Watching others dance makes you want to move your body too. In Sasya’s heart, instead of tension, an eager desire to dance quickly had now taken root.

“Next, the tap dance group.”

Six children, including Sasya and Oksana, came to the center. All of them had long, slender limbs and graceful necks and calves. Whether by coincidence or Vadim’s arrangement, the six boys and girls were similar in height.

Sasya lightly tapped the floor in shoes while flexing his legs after having stretched his legs until his insteps hurt earlier. The vibration starting from the heel of the shoes traveled up through the knees, spine, and back. Tap dance has a completely different center of gravity from ballet, which moves statically against gravity, and instead requires agility, something Sasya was confident in.

He extended his arms to match the slow violin melody, then quickly tapped the floor at a tempo slightly faster than the beat. Without needing to maintain passé, he kept the firmly extended leg axis with a low relevé up, then did twelve rapid turns with precise spotting. After turning, to avoid staggering like a bear drunk on fermented grapes, one must maintain spotting.

However, in the last three turns, Sasya noticed Oksana’s body and head turning together – because their eyes met in mid-air! – Sasya quickly moved half a step closer to her and carefully pushed his left shoulder forward. Although this caused Sasya’s line to deviate slightly, it wasn’t very noticeable.

And with Sasya’s help, Oksana quickly regained her diagonal direction and posed gracefully, extending her arms and legs in croisé position as if she had never lost her spotting. Sasya and Oksana’s eyes met through the mirror in front as he held the same pose.

Then without even a moment to catch his breath, they did a grand balancé, with arm movements that seemed like tango and diagonal crossing steps, ending with eight quick chaînés turns.

As the six dancers finished in identical poses with the characteristic heel-striking sound of tap, applause suddenly erupted. At the same time, Sasya noticed his fellow dancers in the mirror wearing puzzled expressions. Still, since he couldn’t break form until the music ended, the children maintained their poses until the final drawn-out violin notes ceased.

“Next!”

Moving back from center stage, Sasya wiped his nose while glancing at the dancers standing against the wall. The applause had definitely come from that direction. However, Romashina and the others merely wore satisfied smiles, without offering any particular praise or words to the boys and girls passing before them.

Feeling somewhat deflated, Sasya stood against the wall following the other children who had finished their performance. Then a small voice fell beside Sasya.

“Spasiba.”

It was Oksana. At this word of thanks in his native language, Sasya turned away shyly, wiping sweat from his chin.