LMUC Ch 9
by mimiJust then, Koi, who was drinking water, spluttered it out in surprise.
“Cough, cough.”
Choking, he coughed urgently, and Ashley handed him a napkin.
“Th-thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
After finally calming his cough, Koi straightened up. In the meantime, Ashley finished preparing breakfast.
“Did you make all this?”
Koi asked, looking at the plates of food. Ashley replied casually.
“It’s nothing special. Just had to cook it.”
Indeed, it wasn’t anything that required exceptional culinary skills. It was just bacon, eggs, sausages, potatoes, and salad. But the fact that he prepared it alone was impressive. Koi looked at Ashley sitting across from him and asked.
“Do you always have breakfast like this?”
“No.”
Ashley answered readily.
“I usually just eat cereal.”
“So, you made this because of me?”
Koi asked on purpose. It was clearly a joke, but Ashley’s response was just a smiling face.
Oh.
Koi hesitated. Did he really do it for me?
“Eat up.”
Ashley said as he unfolded a napkin. Koi hurriedly picked up his fork and replied, “Yeah.” It had also been a long time since he’d had breakfast, and it turned out to be one of the best breakfasts he could remember.
🏒
“Ash! Hey, are you okay? All better?”
As soon as they arrived at school after a long time, Bill, who was parking his car, greeted them happily. Ashley, getting out of the car, naturally gave him a hug before pulling away and answering.
“I’m fine now. Nothing much happened?”
“It’s only been a few days.”
Bill said with a sly smile.
“You came back sooner than expected. Didn’t you say you’d rest for about a week?”
“The coach misunderstood. I clearly said I’d rest just a little.”
“Oh.”
Bill whistled shortly and inspected Ashley’s slightly swollen cheek.
“It looks a bit swollen, but this should be fine, right?”
“It was pretty painful.”
Ashley smiled wryly. Though he deserved it.
While walking together, Ashley half-listened to Bill chattering away. According to Koi, a rumor had spread that Ariel dumped Ashley, but he didn’t really care.
As expected, Bill’s talk was filled with trivial matters. After hearing about a dog that pooped on the street during a walk, Ashley almost yawned.
“Did anyone come looking for me while I was out?”
Trying to change the subject, he asked. Bill answered, “No.”
“Nobody?”
Oh no, Ashley thought. Did he forget meeting Koi?
“You told Koi that Ariel dumped me, right?”
“Koi?”
Bill tilted his head and asked.
“That small, skinny guy? Why? Oh, right.”
He snapped his fingers belatedly.
“He came by and asked why you weren’t around. I told him you were resting because you were sick.”
Bill walked away humming a tune, and Ashley frowned.
“…That’s all?”
“Yeah, that’s all. Why? Is there a problem?”
Bill asked curiously. Ashley feigned ignorance and quickly changed the topic while taking off his shirt.
“So, what happened with that dog?”
“What? Oh, right. I tried to pick up the poop, but I didn’t have a bag…”
Ashley let Bill’s chatter wash over him.
Nothing much happened.
Ashley didn’t mention Koi visiting to comfort him. It was enough that only Koi and he knew.
Just then, a group approached.
“Ash, you’re back.”
“Hey, why are you always getting beat up? How many times is it now?”
The bulky guys greeted him enthusiastically, jostling him around. After giving them all light hugs, Ashley prepared for class. As he looked for Koi, he spotted a familiar head in the distance and smiled slightly.
It’s Koi.
No matter how many people were around, he could always find Koi instantly. It was a new and fascinating experience. Among the crowd, Koi stood out brightly. He could recognize him with just a small glimpse.
Koi opened his locker. After rummaging inside, he closed it and turned around. Ashley waited for him to notice.
Their eyes met.
Ash.
I could clearly see his lips forming my name. Ashley’s smile deepened, and Koi waved back with a smile.
“I’m off.”
Ashley said goodbye to the group and walked briskly. He pushed through the crowd, heading straight towards one point.
“Koi!”
Calling his name from behind, Ashley pounced on Koi, who let out a soft cry.
I like you.
Ashley felt a surge of joy as he hugged him tightly.
🏒
“Joining the cheerleading team?”
Looking surprised, Ariel, the cheerleading team captain, stared at Koi. Despite much hesitation, Koi had finally knocked on the cheerleading team’s door.
“Are you serious? You know you’ll have to wear a skirt, right?”
Ariel asked with a frown. Koi diverted the conversation instead of answering directly.
“I’ll do my best.”
“Doing your best isn’t enough. You have to be good.”
Ariel snapped. Koi had already thought they were different from him, so he had nothing to say. Ariel continued, seeing his embarrassed, blushing face.
“Are you sure? The season has already started. It’d be a problem if you back out.”
“Please let me join.”
Koi pleaded desperately. Ariel crossed her arms and scrutinized him. Her face showed clear signs of contemplation, and Koi held his breath, waiting for the result.
Finally, after giving him a reluctant look, Ariel took a big step towards him. Startled, Koi flinched as she whispered softly.
“I know you’re doing this for extra credit.”
As Koi gulped, she gave him a sharp look and warned.
“It’s good that you volunteered for extra credit, but if you mess up our team, you’ll regret it.”
A chill ran down Koi’s spine, and he nodded hastily.
“Y-Yeah.”
“Alright.”
Ariel stepped back. Returning to her strict captain demeanor, she spoke to the petrified Koi.
“We’re in a hurry, but we don’t just accept anyone. In the worst case, we’ll change the routine and finish the season ourselves. Got it?”
“Yeah, got it.”
“Good.”
Ariel nodded again and handed him a prepared printout. She explained to the hurriedly accepting Koi.
“These are the basic moves. Practice and we’ll test you to see where you stand. If you mess up, you’re out. So focus.”
“Got it. Thanks.”
As Koi quickly checked the printout, Ariel pulled out her phone to check the date and said.
“This day works for the test. Prepare by then. The whole team will decide if you pass.”
“Got it. I’ll be ready.”
As Koi rushed to put the printout in his bag and leave the room, Ariel called out.
“Wait, Conner Niles.”
“Huh?”
Pausing and turning around, Koi saw Ariel looking at him suspiciously and asked.
“Just to check, you can skate, right?”
“S-Skate?”
Caught off guard, Koi stuttered, and Ariel frowned.
“Obviously. Don’t you know our school’s ice hockey team is the national high school champion? Naturally, the cheerleading team supports the ice hockey team.”
“R-Right.”
He had forgotten. No, he hadn’t even thought about it. Seeing Koi’s delayed reaction, Ariel’s expression changed quickly.
“Are you serious? You can’t skate?”
“N-No, I can, of course, I can.”
In his panic, he denied it vehemently. Ariel still looked suspicious but didn’t press further.
“No matter how well you skate, if you can’t do the basic moves, it’s over.”
With that, she turned and walked towards the team members stretching. Koi hesitated for a moment before hurriedly leaving.
I’m in trouble.
As soon as he stepped outside, reality hit him. Koi turned pale and grabbed his head. Skating? He hadn’t even thought about it. Skating while performing routines?
He couldn’t even skate, let alone owned a pair of skates!
Standing there with a blank expression, Koi had no idea what to do.
How do I handle this? Should I back out now? What about my extra credit? Ask for something else? No, this is the last chance. What about my grades if I don’t do this? Is there really no other way?
Groaning in distress, he heard a familiar voice from behind.
“Koi? What are you doing here?”
Startled, Koi turned around. Seeing a familiar face approaching, he felt a wave of relief and shouted involuntarily.
“Ash!”
Koi, delighted, ran up and stopped right in front of Ashley. Ashley, who had been waiting, smiled but looked puzzled. Koi took a deep breath and began to speak.
“So, I…”
Just as he was about to continue, Koi paused. Suddenly, something crossed his mind. Ashley had dated Ariel. Even if that wasn’t the case, most athletes were close with the cheerleading team and knew their internal affairs well. Hadn’t he heard about the critical shortage in the cheerleading team?
Could it be that he knows about the skirts too?
Though it was an inevitable reality, Koi couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud, especially not to Ashley.
As Koi hesitated, Ashley looked at him curiously. Before he could ask, the cheerleading team’s door opened, and the voices of the girls were heard. Ashley quickly grabbed Koi’s arm and pulled him along.
“Let’s go.”
“Huh, okay.”
As he was being dragged away, Koi realized it was still awkward. He thought to himself as he followed Ashley diligently.
“Now, tell me.”
Ashley led Koi to an isolated spot behind the school and spoke once they were alone. The opportunity had come, but Koi couldn’t bring himself to speak.
I’m joining the cheerleading team and have to dress up. I need to practice routines. And now, I have to skate. I don’t even have skates! Why? Because I can’t afford them!
“Koi.”
Ashley said to Koi, who squeezed his eyes shut.
“Talk to me; otherwise, I can’t help.”
In a soft voice, he coaxed Koi. It was clear Ashley genuinely wanted to help. But Koi, who had worn so many layers of defense, couldn’t easily reveal his true self.
“Koi.”
Ashley said to Koi, who stood with his head bowed.
“Don’t you trust me?”
“N-No.”
Koi hastily shook his head. Embarrassment quickly turned his ears red.
“…I’m just embarrassed.”
“Embarrassed about what?”
The question came again. Koi groaned deeply in his throat and then finally sighed.
“Well, actually…”
Koi struggled to speak. Ashley listened patiently to his fragmented words. Koi tried to be as honest as possible, omitting only the fact that he had to dress up.
“So they’re filling the vacancy that way.”
Ashley murmured after hearing the story. Koi felt tense but relieved that Ashley seemed unaware of the latest news. So, he really doesn’t know about the break-up with Ariel. Koi mentally sighed in relief. Thank goodness.
Ashley thought for a moment and then spoke.
“So, your concern is that you can’t skate and don’t have skates?”
“Y-Yeah.”
“It’s best to buy skates that fit your feet, but since you only need them for one season…”
“Yeah.”
Ashley provided a solution to the tense Koi.
“Let’s do this. We have an ice rink in my house’s basement. You can practice there.”
“A-An ice rink? In your house?”
Ashley continued, seeing Koi’s astonished look.
“I probably still have the skates I wore as a kid. Let’s see if we can find a pair that fits you. How about it?”
“O-Okay.”
Koi nodded absentmindedly. Ashley smiled brightly and said.
“So, that solves everything, right? Any other issues?”
“Um…”
Koi blinked. No. His problems had been solved instantly.
“No, nothing.”
Koi’s face flushed as he nodded hastily.
“Really, it’s all solved now, everything.”
He looked up at Ashley with sparkling eyes, almost reverently. Ashley nearly burst into laughter.
“Good to hear.”
Ashley continued with a smile.
“So, how will you practice? You need to train every day to get used to it. I won’t be free until 7 pm due to my practice. We can go to my place, have dinner, and practice skating for about 2 hours. We’ll finish around 11 pm. Is that too late? Can you manage?”
“I can. I can manage.”
Koi nodded hastily.
“My part-time job also ends around that time.”
In reality, his job ended at 10 pm, but the additional tasks took another 1-2 hours. Of course, there was no extra pay for that.
“I can quit my weekday part-time job.”
He would have to work all weekend, but it couldn’t be helped. Maintaining his grades was a priority.
“Isn’t that too much?”
Ashley asked, frowning with concern. Seeing his worried expression, Koi forced a brighter smile.
“It’s fine. This is more important right now.”
“Well, I guess that’s true.”
Ashley nodded in agreement with Koi.
“Alright, then we’re all set. When do you want to start? Today?”
“Please. I don’t have much time to practice. I need to memorize the basic moves too.”
Koi urgently pleaded. Every day, every hour was critical. Although he had skimmed through them, he couldn’t understand the moves at all. Seeing Koi’s desperate face, Ashley murmured knowingly.
“There’s a lot to do on the cheerleading team.”
Ashley, who seemed to be thinking for a moment, then spoke.
“Alright, let’s meet at 7:10 pm. I’ll keep the car running, so come to my car. I’ll park it on the road in front of the school. Can you find it?”
“I think so.”
There wouldn’t be many cars left at that time. The Cayenne would be hard to miss. But Ashley still seemed unsure.
“If you can’t find it, call me.”
Leaving these instructions, he hurried away. It was almost time for the ice hockey team’s practice to start.
Koi on the cheerleading team.
As he walked quickly, Ashley sighed.
Never thought they’d actually make a guy dress up to bring good luck.
🏒
After class, while sitting alone in the quiet cafeteria waiting for Ashley, Koi looked up the basic moves Ariel had given him. He couldn’t understand them from the text and illustrations alone, so he watched videos, but they were still incomprehensible.
Why does the human body move like this?
Koi, who couldn’t even do a simple cartwheel, couldn’t imagine how to perform these moves. Even as a child, he couldn’t do the easiest rolls.
Can I really do this?
Time flew as he sighed and rewatched the videos. The alarm he had set rang loudly, startling him. He quickly gathered his things and left the cafeteria.
He had already noted where Ashley’s car was parked. First, he needed to retrieve his bike. Though bikes often disappeared, no one stole Koi’s old and worn-out bike. It was alone, just as he had left it. Koi expertly mounted it and pedaled away.
Finding Ashley’s Cayenne wasn’t difficult. After passing the sports ground and exiting the parking lot, he saw Ashley’s car. Ashley, seeing Koi approach through the rearview mirror, opened the trunk.
“Get in.”
Ashley, who had gotten out of the driver’s seat, stood in front of the open trunk.
It’s my bike. Shouldn’t I do it?
Hesitant, Koi moved towards the passenger seat, watching Ashley lift his old bike with one hand and load it into the car. He quietly sat in the passenger seat.
Ashley quickly returned to the driver’s seat and fastened his seatbelt. After checking Koi’s seatbelt, he skillfully turned the steering wheel and asked.
“How about having dinner at my place? Is that okay?”
“Huh? Sure, that’s great.”
Koi answered enthusiastically but blushed, feeling he had revealed his intention to save money. Whether Ashley noticed or not, he continued.
“We need to practice right after eating. Any detours would waste time.”
“Oh, I see.”
That’s a relief. Koi thought, feeling reassured. Ashley drove expertly, heading straight for the country.
🏒
The dinner Ashley prepared was made in advance by a housekeeper, and the quantity was enormous. Koi had never seen such a large salad bowl. So, people eat this much greens too. Well, elephants are herbivores, after all.
The mashed potatoes in a similarly large bowl beside the salad bowl made Koi wonder how much would be left over.
Contrary to his expectations, Ashley served only chicken salad, steak, and mashed potatoes for both of them. Koi, expecting continuous servings, looked curiously at Ashley sitting across from him and asked.
“Don’t you eat much at home?”
“Well, it’s not that.”
Ashley, as if suddenly remembering, stood up and added.
“This is all we have for now.”
“Ugh.”
As Koi cut a large piece of steak and put it in his mouth, it got stuck in his throat. Quickly patting his chest and gulping water, he barely composed himself. He looked at his and Ashley’s plates alternately and decided to cut his remaining steak in half. It was the only solution.
“What are you doing?”
Ashley asked, noticing Koi moving his steak to Ashley’s plate. Koi froze and looked up at him.
“Well, it’s a bit much for me.”
“That’s all you’re eating?”
Ashley glanced at Koi’s plate. Seeing the drastically reduced steak, Koi forced a smile.
“Yeah, I don’t eat much.”
“…Really?”
While Ashley responded, Koi quickly transferred the steak. Completing his mission successfully, he felt a sense of accomplishment. Smiling contentedly, he heard Ashley muttering to himself.
“That’s why you’re so small.”
Had Ashley not said that, Koi would have retorted, have you ever seen such a big bean? Isn’t it you who’s excessively large? If all humanity ate like you, the earth would be long gone. With all that meat and greens, how’s anything supposed to survive? And so on, loudly.
However, the fact that it was Ashley completely dampened his resolve. Instead, Koi nodded, thinking, if Ash says so, then it must be true. Ashley then asked.
“What drink do you want?”
“Huh? Oh, cola.”
He answered absentmindedly, and Ashley, standing by the refrigerator door, asked again.
“Mango, apple, lime, zero, original, which one?”
“M-Mango!”
Ashley grabbed two mango colas and two glasses, placing one in front of Koi.
“Thanks.”
He thanked him again, but Ashley didn’t respond and turned to the fridge’s ice maker, filling his glass with ice. Sitting back down and filling his cup with cola, Ashley took a big gulp, and Koi blinked.
“Um…”
“You don’t like ice, right?”
Ashley’s question cut off Koi’s words.
“Y-Yeah.”
He stammered, swallowing his words and quietly drinking his cola. Though Ashley had said that was all the food, it turned out to be a lot. Koi filled his stomach with mashed potatoes and salad instead of the missing meat.
Feeling quite full, Koi put down his fork and leaned back in his chair. Ashley, having also finished his meal, wiped his mouth with a napkin.
“Is it enough? Not too little?”
Koi asked, and Ashley responded nonchalantly.
“I don’t always eat that much. This is fine.”
Standing up first, he began clearing the plates. Already? Koi, surprised, quickly followed suit. After quickly clearing the table, Ashley spoke.
“Shall we head to practice?”
The food he had just eaten suddenly felt heavy in his stomach. Koi nodded, feeling a tightness in his chest.
“Yeah.”
🏒
The ice rink Ashley mentioned was on the second basement level. When Koi asked what was on the first basement level, Ashley simply answered, “Wine.”
…Cold.
As soon as the door to the second basement level opened, a cold breeze hit them. Koi shivered and breathed heavily. Ashley, who had entered first, turned and asked.
“Are you okay? Do you want a jacket?”
“C-Can I?”
Seeing Koi’s chattering teeth, Ashley readily opened one of the several closets. Inside were various clothes and skates. Ashley took out a thin jacket and handed it to Koi.
“You should get used to the temperature. You have to if you want to join the cheerleading team.”
“Yeah, I will.”
Koi nodded obediently, but for now, avoiding the cold was more urgent. The jacket Ashley gave him wasn’t thick enough to block the chill completely, but it was better than nothing. Watching Koi hurriedly put it on, Ashley asked.
“What’s your shoe size?”
“Huh? Oh, 7.5.”
“What?”
Ashley turned his head while searching for skates. Koi felt embarrassed but answered louder.
“7.5. Seven and a half!”
“Wow…”
Ashley exhaled in surprise and turned back. He was muttering to himself, but in the empty rink, Koi could hear him clearly.
“I wore size 8 in fourth grade…”
Koi wanted to hide from embarrassment.
The skates were well-preserved. According to Ashley, he grew so quickly that many of his shoes and clothes had never been worn and were just stored away. That was something Koi couldn’t imagine.
“Is this better? Or this?”
Ashley asked, and Koi pondered for a moment. The right skate fit well in size, but the left felt more secure. Being honest, Ashley made the decision for him.
“Let’s go with the left. Skates should fit snugly.”
He added that loose skates could cause injuries. Koi followed his instructions without a word.
“Sit down, I’ll tie them for you.”
Ashley had Koi sit on a bench, then knelt in front of him. Startled, Koi reached out.
“It’s okay, I can do it.”
“Next time.”
Ashley said, skillfully tying the laces.
“I’ll do it for you this time.”
Ashley was excessively kind. Koi’s heart warmed at his kindness, but he reminded himself not to get overconfident.
Ashley is a good person and kind to everyone.
Thinking he was special just because they became friends by chance would be a huge mistake. Ashley had many friends, and even more people liked him. Everyone wanted to get closer to him. So, a situation like Koi’s could happen to anyone.
Just be grateful.
Koi calmed himself and looked down. He saw Ashley’s cowlick for the first time. It was strange and fascinating. He never imagined he would ever be looking down at Ashley.
And Ash kneeling in front of me.
Koi held his breath and watched him. Ashley’s delicate fingers, skillfully tying the long, thin laces into knots, captured his attention. His fingers were long and graceful, and even his square nails were pretty.
Lost in thought, Koi asked inadvertently.
“Ash, do you play any musical instruments?”
“Hmm… the flute?”
He asked without thinking, but the answer was unexpected. Koi blinked and asked.
“The flute? Really?”
“Yeah.”
Having tied one lace, Ashley straightened up and took hold of Koi’s other leg. Gently holding his calf and pulling it towards him, he bent down again, winding the loose lace around his fingers.
“I even did my music exam with it.”
“Really? What piece?”
“Sentimental.”
“Sentimental?”
Repeating his own words, Koi asked, and Ashley answered.
“Yeah, Claude Bolling’s.”
It was a name Koi had never heard before. He wasn’t well-versed in music. Instead, he made a mental note to look it up later. But as if understanding Koi’s thoughts, Ashley paused his lacing and quickly tapped something on his phone.
“Here, listen.”
“Oh.”
Ashley placed his phone on the bench beside Koi and returned to lacing. Just as Koi was about to thank him, the music started.
Soft jazz music played gently. The beautiful melody, which Koi had never heard before, left him speechless for a moment.
Ash played this…
As he listened intently to the flute, he imagined how Ash might have played it. Did those long fingers press each note like they were tying the laces now? Did his eyes look down, long lashes occasionally fluttering?
He must have taken breaths between notes. Opened his lips, inhaled, and slowly exhaled with each note.
Ah.
Koi thought.
How beautiful he must have looked.
An inexplicable sadness filled his heart, and just then, Ashley lifted his head, having finished tying the laces. Koi, who had been watching, suddenly met his eyes. Ashley’s eyes curved, and his lips formed a gentle smile.
“All done.”
“…Yeah.”
Koi quickly cleared his throat to steady his voice.
“Thank you.”
“Sure.”
Ashley responded simply, and this time, he put on his own skates. Unlike the careful lacing of Koi’s skates, he finished his own quickly. Watching, Koi asked.
“When did you start skating?”
Ashley moved to the rink and answered.
“Let’s see, when I was four?”
“What?”
Koi’s astonished voice echoed as Ashley skated away. From the bench, Koi watched Ashley glide freely on the ice. After skating a lap, Ashley returned to Koi.
“Come on, your turn.”
Ashley extended his hand. Koi took a deep breath and stood up with courage. As he wobbled, Ashley quickly grabbed his arms.
“Thanks.”
“No problem.”
Ashley lightly brushed it off and took Koi’s hands, stepping back. Following Ashley’s lead, Koi took slow steps forward. Finally, when both feet were on the ice, he exclaimed.
“Ahh!”
“Koi!”
With a scream, Koi fell, sprawling on the ice. Luckily, his hands were unscathed, thanks to Ashley’s firm grip.
“Koi, it’s okay. I’ll hold you, so slowly…”
Ashley bent down and helped Koi up bit by bit. Koi tried to stand by himself, but his body wouldn’t cooperate. Each time he set his skates on the ice, the blades slipped, and his legs slid out. Even when he managed to stand, the skates often toppled sideways.
After several attempts, Koi lost all confidence.
How can I dance wearing these?
Can I even join the cheerleading team? What about my extra credit? If I don’t get the points, I won’t get into college. No matter how poor or difficult things are, failing because of my inability is different. Am I going to fail without even stepping into college?
Even with Ashley’s help, Koi couldn’t stand steadily on the ice. Everything seemed impossible. His expression hardened as a sense of hopelessness washed over him. Then, it happened.
“Koi, Koi, Koi.”
Ashley called his name repeatedly, as if urging him to get a grip. Looking into Koi’s panicked face, he spoke calmly.
“It’s okay, don’t worry. I’ll help you, you can do it.”
Ashley’s soothing words didn’t reach Koi, who shook his head, teary-eyed.
“I can’t…”
Feeling foolish and defeated, tears welled up. Standing in front of kind Ashley made the emotions surge faster. Memories of past struggles filled his mind, and words of frustration spilled out.
“I’m really bad at sports. Why do they have to include this in the grading system? Some people are good at it, and others aren’t. I’m not good at making friends or moving my body. It’s too harsh. Are they saying people like me shouldn’t go to college? It’s so unfair…”
Feeling both frustrated and embarrassed, Koi began to sob uncontrollably.
Can’t trying your best be enough? Despite the tough circumstances, I’ve done my utmost to endure, but everyone says that’s not enough. They say you have to do what you can’t, no matter what. Even if I try my hardest, it’s not happening. Look, others can skate, and I can’t even stand. This is it. I’m completely ruined.
Everything was a mess. As Koi sobbed, Ashley remained silent, simply waiting for his tears to subside.
After some time, when Koi was left sniffling, Ashley spoke gently.
“Feeling a bit better?”
“…Yeah.”
Koi nodded. With the sudden surge of emotions receding, guilt set in. Ashley had taken time out of his busy and tiring schedule to help, and Koi responded with complaints and tears. He couldn’t even lift his face.
“Sorry, Ash…”
He apologized in a small voice, and Ashley shook his head.
“It’s okay, everyone feels down sometimes.”
“Everyone?”
Koi looked up. Ashley laughed at the sight of his red-tipped nose.
“Yeah, everyone.”
Koi knew well that “everyone” didn’t include Ashley Miller but chose not to voice it. It wasn’t the time for more complaints.
“Sorry, Ash. I’m okay now.”
Taking a deep breath, Koi said.
“I’ll try again.”
“Good, but first…”
Ashley slipped his hands under Koi’s arms and lifted him upright. Startled, Koi blinked, confused. What just happened?
It didn’t end there. Ashley suddenly picked Koi up.
“W-What?”
“Hold still. It’s dangerous if you struggle.”
Koi, flailing instinctively, quickly huddled at Ashley’s warning. Skillfully gliding on the ice, Ashley returned them to their starting point.
“Here.”
Setting Koi down on the bench, Ashley brought him a bottle of water. Koi thanked him and drank deeply. His throat was parched from crying. After drinking, he set the bottle down, and Ashley spoke.
“When you’re calm, let’s start again.”
“…Okay, thanks.”
“Alright, you’ve thanked me enough. You don’t need to keep saying it. Got it?”
After adding the final words, Ashley looked at him as if it was time to respond. Koi nodded hastily.
Different music played from Ashley’s phone. He turned it off and tossed the phone aside. Silence returned. An awkward stillness settled. Trying to calm his still-sniffling breath, Koi began.
“How did you start skating so young?”
“It’s a trivial reason.”
Ashley said.
“My dad made me.”
“Ah…”
Koi tried to picture his father, a talented but devilish lawyer from the East. Ashley added as if to himself.
“I started with figure skating.”
“What? Figure skating? You?”
It was unexpected. Koi exclaimed, and Ashley laughed.
“Yeah. Why? Doesn’t it suit me?”
“N-No.”
Koi asked, still in shock.
“Why did you quit?”
“Well,” Ashley answered indifferently.
“I kept growing.”
It seemed plausible. Feeling satisfied, Koi changed the subject.
“When did you start ice hockey?”
“Fourth grade. A bit late.”
“Since you already knew how to skate, was it easier?”
Surprisingly, Ashley shook his head.
“Koi, Koi, Koi.”
Ashley called his name repeatedly, as if urging him to get a grip. Looking into Koi’s panicked face, he spoke calmly.
“It’s okay, don’t worry. I’ll help you, you can do it.”
Ashley’s soothing words didn’t reach Koi, who shook his head, teary-eyed.
“I can’t…”
Feeling foolish and defeated, tears welled up. Standing in front of kind Ashley made the emotions surge faster. Memories of past struggles filled his mind, and words of frustration spilled out.
“I’m really bad at sports. Why do they have to include this in the grading system? Some people are good at it, and others aren’t. I’m not good at making friends or moving my body. It’s too harsh. Are they saying people like me shouldn’t go to college? It’s so unfair…”
Feeling both frustrated and embarrassed, Koi began to sob uncontrollably.
Can’t trying your best be enough? Despite the tough circumstances, I’ve done my utmost to endure, but everyone says that’s not enough. They say you have to do what you can’t, no matter what. Even if I try my hardest, it’s not happening. Look, others can skate, and I can’t even stand. This is it. I’m completely ruined.
Everything was a mess. As Koi sobbed, Ashley remained silent, simply waiting for his tears to subside.
After some time, when Koi was left sniffling, Ashley spoke gently.
“Feeling a bit better?”
“…Yeah.”
Koi nodded. With the sudden surge of emotions receding, guilt set in. Ashley had taken time out of his busy and tiring schedule to help, and Koi responded with complaints and tears. He couldn’t even lift his face.
“Sorry, Ash…”
He apologized in a small voice, and Ashley shook his head.
“It’s okay, everyone feels down sometimes.”
“Everyone?”
Koi looked up. Ashley laughed at the sight of his red-tipped nose.
“Yeah, everyone.”
Koi knew well that “everyone” didn’t include Ashley Miller but chose not to voice it. It wasn’t the time for more complaints.
“Sorry, Ash. I’m okay now.”
Taking a deep breath, Koi said.
“I’ll try again.”
“Good, but first…”
Ashley slipped his hands under Koi’s arms and lifted him upright. Startled, Koi blinked, confused. What just happened?
It didn’t end there. Ashley suddenly picked Koi up.
“W-What?”
“Hold still. It’s dangerous if you struggle.”
Koi, flailing instinctively, quickly huddled at Ashley’s warning. Skillfully gliding on the ice, Ashley returned them to their starting point.
“Here.”
Setting Koi down on the bench, Ashley brought him a bottle of water. Koi thanked him and drank deeply. His throat was parched from crying. After drinking, he set the bottle down, and Ashley spoke.
“When you’re calm, let’s start again.”
“…Okay, thanks.”
“Alright, you’ve thanked me enough. You don’t need to keep saying it. Got it?”
After adding the final words, Ashley looked at him as if it was time to respond. Koi nodded hastily.
Different music played from Ashley’s phone. He turned it off and tossed the phone aside. Silence returned. An awkward stillness settled. Trying to calm his still-sniffling breath, Koi began.
“How did you start skating so young?”
“It’s a trivial reason.”
Ashley said.
“My dad made me.”
“Ah…”
Koi tried to picture his father, a talented but devilish lawyer from the East. Ashley added as if to himself.
“I started with figure skating.”
“What? Figure skating? You?”
It was unexpected. Koi exclaimed, and Ashley laughed.
“Yeah. Why? Doesn’t it suit me?”
“N-No.”
Koi asked, still in shock.
“Why did you quit?”
“Well,” Ashley answered indifferently.
“I kept growing.”
It seemed plausible. Feeling satisfied, Koi changed the subject.
“When did you start ice hockey?”
“Fourth grade. A bit late.”
“Since you already knew how to skate, was it easier?”
Surprisingly, Ashley shook his head.